


Revealed in Discovery

by ragcat



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Bottom!Loki, Complete, Fluff and Humor, FrostIron - Freeform, M/M, Mpreg, Oral Sex, Romance, Slash, loki/tony stark - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-22
Updated: 2016-05-01
Packaged: 2017-12-27 07:54:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 54
Words: 177,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/976322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ragcat/pseuds/ragcat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The God of Mischief has been rehabilitated and keeps showing up at Stark Tower. Tony knows he should keep his distance, but he's never been good at resisting temptation. And, what you don't know may not hurt you, but it sure can lead to some awkward surprises.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Español available: [Revelado en el Descubrimiento](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5938483) by [AnnMarcus63](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnMarcus63/pseuds/AnnMarcus63)



> This takes place about a year after "The Avengers," and I'm ignoring that peek at Thanos they gave us there at the end of the movie. This is my first fic in this fandom, by the way, and being late to the game, I'm sure this premise has been done before, but I really like the idea of Loki trying to cope with being in a recovery-from-evil program and Stark trying to figure out what to do with him. There will be smut in the next chapter.

**Discovery:** _A category of procedural devices employed by a party to a civil or criminal action, prior to trial, to require the adverse party to disclose information that is essential for the preparation of the requesting party's case and that the other party alone knows or possesses._

* * *

 

The first time it happened, Tony Stark wasn’t prepared.

Well, that would be an understatement. Having the goddamn alien God of Mischief suddenly materialize in the middle of a guy’s kitchen floor isn’t exactly the kind of appointment a genius billionaire-playboy-philanthropist type has entered into his Outlook calendar.

The kitchen was a mess too, as Tony had just put a panful of eggs, onions, sausage, bacon, and cheese (cholesterol be damned) on the stove, and he’d left greasy knives, soiled utensils and discarded packaging in his wake. But, he didn’t have time to be embarrassed by his less-than-pristine cooking style because by the time Loki got through apparating, or whatever it was that he did, he'd made Tony’s previous mess look like the Royal Palace on inspection day. You know, what with the whirlwind of air displacement kicking up dust and throwing potholders, place mats and dish towels around like so much confetti.

“Hello, human.” The malevolent sounding voice seemed to swirl around Tony's head, and then Loki stood there, tall and majestic in his leathers, his long ink-black hair settling softly around his shoulders. His eyes were glittering with intent and he had a slight smile on his lips.

“Aw, shit...” Tony muttered, unable to take his eyes off a grocery list fluttering slowly to the floor. But then he got a glimpse of Loki’s eyes and quickly diverted his attention. “Well, hey there, Reindeer Games! It’s been too long, by which I mean, it hasn’t been long enough. What the hell are you doing here? And, I _am_ armed, well, sort of.” Tony hastily picked up a slippery-handled kitchen knife, intending to brandish it threateningly, but it promptly slid between his fingers and fell to the floor. He dove to pick it up, but it disappeared. When he stood up, he saw it glinting in Loki’s hand.

And, oddly, Loki handed it back, handle first. “This is disgusting. What were you doing, preparing to roast a boar?” He had a puzzled sneer on his face.

Tony gazed at the proffered weapon and/or kitchen tool, and gingerly took it back. “No—I got a little nostalgic for my mom’s Sunday morning omelets, and I guess I got carried away. Oh, and _why_ haven’t you plunged this thing into my guts yet, by the way?”

Loki rolled his eyes. “Didn’t my brother tell you? I’ve been rehabilitated. I’m a good little son of Odin now. Certainly no need to stir up my father’s minions by skewering lowly mortals. I’m simply paying you what I understand is known in this realm as a ‘courtesy call.’”

“Courtesy call. What the hell does that mean?”

Loki took in a deep breath, letting it slowly escape between his lips as if he were about to dip his hands into something rank, and then he said, “I’m... sorry.”

Tony stood in his typical cocky pose with his arms crossed, blinking at an unnaturally rapid rate. Then, he shook his head, a contorted expression squishing all his features together as he spat out, “Sorry? You’re _sorry?_ For what, destroying half my town? For throwing me out a window?” He suddenly strode up to the god and got in his face. “Or, for _killing my friend?_ Which is it, low-life?”

Loki met his eyes, then dropped his gaze to the floor. “For everything. All of it. I know my words mean nothing to you. I know I am fully deserving of your anger, your hatred—and more. Even so, I wanted you to know that I no longer believe myself to be above you and your kind, or any other living being for that matter. I wish I could make amends to you and everyone I hurt. It is impossible... yet I wish it all the same.”

Tony felt his fury rising. “Aw, poor baby. And, what am I supposed to do now, give you a hug? Tell you it’s okay, that that’s all I needed to hear and, woo-hoo, all is forgiven?”

Loki shook his head tiredly. “No. I expect nothing from you. No forgiveness, no kindness. It was just an attempt to... offer something.” He laughed softly. “I have little else to give, besides my words. It is my hope that I can one day use them to bring forth something other than misery. This was... a start.” Loki drew himself up and Tony could see he was about to disappear.

“Well, it wouldn’t hurt to lay off stuff like saying ‘lowly mortals’ when you’re talking to one of us. Just a suggestion.”

Loki gave a wry grin. “Ah, yes. Old habits, Stark. Apologies.”

And with that, he was gone in a whoosh.

When Tony looked around, the kitchen was spotless. The mess in his frying pan was now a perfectly turned omelet that would have done his mother proud, and his grocery list was back on the refrigerator door.

* * *

 

The second time it happened, Tony was drunk.

Jane Foster was in New York for some conference or other and Thor had turned up at Stark Towers to invite him and Pepper to have dinner with them at a fancy restaurant. When the ladies headed off to the bathroom, Tony quickly scooted closer to Thor and said, “I saw your brother the other day.”

Thor was still eating, but he paused mid-chew. “Loki,” was all he said. He didn’t sound surprised, and the expression on his face told Tony how much sorrow the younger god had already caused him. “Did he attempt to harm you?”

“Uh... No, but of course, I was pretty heavily armed. I think he knew better than to mess with me,” Tony said in what he hoped was a nonchalant tone.

Thor did him the kindness of hiding a smirk. “Well, then, what did he want?”

“He claims he came to tell me he was sorry.” There was no missing Tony’s bitterness; Thor looked interested.

“Ah. And how did you respond to him, Man of Iron?”

Tony was aware that Thor’s clear blue eyes were on him, that he was being studied. “Well, to be honest, I wasn’t exactly gracious about it.” He took a sip of wine and then met Thor’s gaze. “Do you think I screwed up? Was that some kind of test?”

“Test?”

“Yeah, I don’t know. To see how far he could push me or something?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Thor sighed. “I cannot imagine that my brother is up to such childish nonsense, given his recent incarceration.”

“Speaking of which, what’s this about him being rehabilitated? I mean, like— _really?_ Do they do therapy in the dungeons of Asgard?”

Thor glanced toward the ladies’ room and observed that there was a substantial line, giving them plenty of time to speak privately. He turned back to Tony and lowered his voice. “No. My brother was treated like any other criminal—beaten, starved, humiliated, made bereft of his magic.” Thor’s jaw was tight and Tony noticed he was gripping his fork so tightly that it bent. “I visited him as often as I could, trying to give him strength. But, he simply turned away from me. I couldn’t bear the thought of my little brother, my Loki, being lost forever. I pleaded with my father to... to find another way. He loves Loki, in spite of what my brother has long believed. And, at last, he sought counsel with a healer.

“Now, we have no shortage of healers in Asgard. It is a noble profession, worthy of much respect. But, most care only for the ills of the body. My father found one that cares for the _mind._ He was sent to speak with Loki. When he returned, he came to my father and told him he believed that Loki suffered from madness, and not just that put upon him during his dealings with the Chitauri.”

“The Chitauri? You mean those... things we were battling?”

“They come from another realm which is ruled by a being known as the Other. Do you recall how Loki took control of Agent Barton’s mind? And, that of Dr. Selvig? The Other did the same to Loki.”

“Whoa, there, Point Break. Are you saying Loki wasn’t responsible for his actions?”

“Not at all. But, you see, the healer said Loki’s sickness—his _mind_ sickness—came from within himself, through no fault of his own. That happens sometimes, and your history tells me it happens to humans, as well. The healer said the sickness had been there all along, but when the truth of Loki’s birth was revealed to him, the shock caused it to become manifest. Had that not been the case, the Other would never have been able to exert his influence upon my brother.”

Tony waggled a breadstick as he pondered Thor’s words. “So, you’re saying Loki has some form of, what, schizophrenia? Bipolar disorder? Paranoid psychosis or something?”

Thor looked at him uncertainly. “I know not of the ailments to which you refer. But, Loki’s mind is wounded. My father allowed the healer to take him from the dungeons and bring him to a place where he could mend the damage.”

“Like, a psych ward?”

Thor wrinkled his brow and shrugged. “I know not the mortal term for it. But, when Loki was returned to us, he was healed.”

“Listen, big guy, I’ve gone a few rounds with a shrink from time to time, and I can tell you—what Loki’s got wrong with him doesn’t just go away. He’s, like, Hannibal Lecter-crazy—you know, with the hockey mask and the two-wheeler?”

Again, Thor appeared mystified, but he shook his head slightly and said, “I don’t know about all that, but on your main point I agree, my friend. And if the healer had simply spent time attempting to talk with Loki, I would have no faith in his continued recovery. But, Loki underwent numerous _forms_ of healing.” A sad expression crossed the god’s face. “Extreme forms. I have seen it work on others. True, none were so greatly deranged as Loki. But, the healing has proved to be successful in the past. I have great hopes that it will continue to mend Loki, as well.”

“So, that’s it? He’s now free to roam around and everyone just hopes he won’t suffer a relapse and destroy a small town? Or, a _big_ town? Aren’t psychos supposed to be locked up, so they can, you know, weave baskets and take their pills on time?”

“There are no ‘pills’ that I know of, although I believe there is a draught he must take every so often. But, the healer has sworn upon his own life that Loki no longer poses a threat. And...”

“What?”

“My father could not allow Loki to remain free in Asgard. His subjects would have lost respect for him. They would not understand the conditions Loki is living under, believing only that my father would give his son leniency when he should be living out his days in captivity, or be put to death. So, Father banished him from Asgard.”

Tony started to ask another question, but the girls returned to the table, laughing at a shared joke as they sat down. Pepper observed the somber expressions on the men’s faces and asked, “Everything all right?”

Jane frowned. “Yeah, you two look way too serious for such a pleasant evening. What’re you talking about?”

Tony pulled a cheery smile out of his hat and said, “Aw, no big deal, gorgeous. You’re right, we need to cheer up. How’s about another bottle of wine?” He caught the waiter’s eye and in no time, everyone had another full glass of the best merlot the place had to offer, and by the time everyone decided to call it a night, Tony was pretty well snockered.

* * *

Happy dropped Pepper off at her place and then took Tony home. The billionaire made his way up to his living room and collapsed on the couch. He liked being horizontal, because when the room began spinning, he didn’t have to worry about falling down. In fact, he was willing to bet that that was how the couch came to be invented in the first place.

He was almost asleep, when a soft voice said, “So, my brother told you my story.”

Tony forced his eyes open, just to be sure he was properly hallucinating like a nice, normal drunk, but it was hard to deny what appeared before him—Loki was back, perched on the arm of the far end of Tony’s couch.

“Uh... Huh?”

Loki looked wild, his hair a wind-swept mess, his leathers dusty, his boots caked with mud. “I said, you now know the details of my recovery. What do you think? Am I to be trusted?”

Tony woozily pulled himself into a sitting position, rubbing his eyes. He still wasn’t entirely convinced he wasn’t hallucinating, and he kind of hoped he was, but he responded, “I have no idea. Right now, I’m too drunk to care. But, the real question is—why do _you?_ Care what I think, I mean.”

Loki stared at Tony for a long moment, and then he looked away. “I don’t know. I suppose it doesn’t matter. But my oaf of a brother is so pathetically hopeful that, now that I’ve been released, everything is going to be all right, it’s difficult to maintain an objective viewpoint. I suppose I thought you might offer another perspective. But, I can see you’re in no condition to assess the mental health treatment methods of another realm.” Loki’s eyes took on a mischievous expression. “I’d think you’d do well to look into some sort of twelve-step recovery program, yourself, mortal. I understand extreme amounts of alcohol do the puny human liver no good. Yours must be well-pickled by now.”

“Hey! I can stop anytime I want—”

“Just a suggestion.”

“Listen, I—”

Before Tony could finish his thought, Loki grinned and then somehow, the place where he’d been was nothing but a lot of thin, wavy air.

Tony lay back down, but the room had stopped spinning, and the contours of his furniture were all too solidly real every time he opened his eyes, so he just went to bed.

* * *

The third time it happened, Tony was naked.

He’d been in his lab for the better part of thirteen hours, and things just weren’t coming together for him. He decided he needed to give his brain a break, and his muscles had that tight, under-appreciated feel to them, so he headed for the Olympic-size pool he’d had built on one of the lower floors.

He stripped off his clothes—he preferred swimming in the nude, kind of fun, feeling the water skim around his privates—and dove in. He swam a few slow, lazy laps up and down the length of the pool, letting his mind wander and his body recharge. When he was sufficiently tired, he swam up to the shallow end and sat himself on a ledge made for lounging.

He stretched out and wiggled his toes in the perfectly temperature-controlled water and became vaguely aware that his stomach was empty. But, just as he was considering actually getting up and doing something about that, a water spout appeared in the middle of the pool. Tony watched transfixed as the column of water dissipated, revealing a raven-haired form hovering over the water. It was Loki, naked, and he appeared to be balancing himself on some sort of invisible fulcrum before simply diving into the water, much as Tony had done earlier.

Tony watched the lithe body wriggle along underwater, and he frowned as Loki came up for air and sat himself beside Tony on the ledge.

Naked.

“Hello, human,” Loki said, shaking water from his hair like a dog.

Tony wiped the spray from his eyes and snarled, “What the living _fuck_ are you doing? Can’t you see I’m trying to relax?”

“Oh, I don’t intend to interfere with your relaxation,” Loki said cheerfully. “I merely wished to seek some advice.”

“Advice. You’re coming to me for advice.”

“Yes. Is that unusual in some way?”

“Kind of. You know, with the whole you trying to kill me and take over my planet thing that happened, yeah.”

Loki gave him a reproving look. “I did apologize for that, did I not?”

“Well, yeah. But, still.”

Loki now looked uncertain. “You wish me to leave?”

Tony took a moment to actually look at the god. There was something rankling in the back of his mind that he’d always made damn certain didn’t inch forward into the _front_ of his mind, or his pants, but it was sort of, you know, _hanging_ there now, and it was kind of hard not to notice.

Loki looked _good_. He always did, with his freakin’ leather coat and boots, his mane of hair, his goddamn green eyes that could go from pools of pure sorrow to innocence to murderous deviltry in a fraction of a second. Even so, it had always been pretty easy to ignore that stuff. Having your life and the lives of those around you in jeopardy does that to you, he supposed.

But now, here, sitting less than a foot away and naked, it was just about impossible not to notice that Loki, the alien God of Mischief, was a pretty damn sexy motherfucker, and...

Tony cleared his throat.

“Uh, well, no. You’ve got me curious. What did you want to ask me?”

Loki sat back, stretching out his long legs, much as Tony had right before his arrival. He raised his eyes toward the ceiling and said, “I recall coming upon a certain comestible in your realm—at the time, there was no opportunity to partake of it, but the smell was intoxicating. I’ve always wanted to try it, but I am unsure of the procedure, as there are apparently numerous different ways to prepare it. Do you think you could help me identify it?”

“What... ‘comestible’ are you talking about?”

“The name escapes me—it’s an odd term, but the item is round and appears to have a doughy base covered with some sort of red sauce, to which a layer of fermented milk is then applied. I’ve seen a variety of vegetables and meats placed on top of that, although it does not appear to be mandatory. Do you know of this alluring foodstuff?”

“You mean, pizza?”

Loki’s eyes widened. “Yes! That’s it. Pizza. Have you tried it?”

“This is New York, buddy. We have an entire style of pizza named after us, it’s sold on every block. Yeah, I’ve had pizza. Do you want some?”

“I do. If you can just tell me how to go about acquiring it—”

“Look, I’m starving, myself. I tell you what, I’ll order one for us, and then you can go on your merry way and leave me alone, how about that.”

Loki shifted, regarding Tony suspiciously. “You would take a meal with me?”

“Sure. No big deal, right? I mean, you’re not going to try to kill me or do the window thing again, I’m assuming. So, why not?”

“I don’t wish you ill, Tony Stark.”

“Okay, I’ll get right on it. But first, would you mind, you know, putting on some clothes?”

Loki looked down at himself as if he’d forgotten he was naked. He gave a nod of understanding. “Of course.” He stood up and Tony had an eyeful of taut muscles flexing under pale skin, rather substantial genitalia, and then a firm, round ass as Loki made his way out of the pool. He watched as Loki made a fluid move, and in one second he was clothed in a black t-shirt, skin-tight black jeans stuffed into sleek boots, and a tailored wool jacket that fit him like a second skin. Even his hair was dry. “Is this acceptable garb?”

“Yeah. I’m feeling a little underdressed now, though. Turn around, will you?”

Loki gave him a questioning look, but did as requested. Tony hastily stood up and grabbed a towel, wrapped it around his waist, and then picked up his clothes. He went to a nearby changing room and dressed. “All right, let’s go to the den. We can catch a game while we eat.”

* * *

In the elevator, Tony pulled out his cell phone and punched the speed dial number to his favorite pizza joint. “What do you want on the pizza?” he asked Loki.

Loki frowned thoughtfully. “What are those little red discs of meat? They appear to be some sort of sausage amalgam.”

“Pepperoni? My fave. Okay, you’ve got it. How about onion, anchovies and hot peppers?”

Loki raised one corner of his mouth in distaste and shook his head.

“Not as adventurous as you look, are you, bub? Okay, no problem, I’ll have them put ‘em on my half only. Hello? Yeah, I want to order a pizza...”

A half hour later, they were sitting on Tony’s couch, each balancing a paper plate full of pizza on his lap. There were two bottles of cold beer on the coffee table in front of them, and a football game on the giant TV.

Tony was wolfing his slice down with relish. He looked over at Loki and noted how slowly he ate, long elegant fingers gripping the pizza in such a way as to prevent drips of grease from staining his shirt.

“You don’t eat like your brother, that’s for sure,” Tony observed. “Did he miss out on table manners 101 or something?”

Loki glanced at Tony and then shrugged. “I’ve never cared for stuffing myself. Food is nothing more than sustenance and I don’t require a lot. But, this is quite delicious.” He bit his lip and then added, “Thank you.”

“Well, you can get the next round.”

Loki chuckled. “Surely you’re not suggesting we make a habit of dining together?” He sounded scornful, but Tony thought he picked up on a hint of something else.

“Hey, look, I got no problem with you, man. Your brother tells me you’re trying to get your head on straight, and I respect that. I believe in second chances. God knows, I’ve been lucky enough to get a few. Just prove to me that I can trust you, and we’re golden.”

Loki chewed for a moment, and then asked, “And, what would I have to do to gain your trust, in order to achieve this state of gold you mention?”

“Well, not killing me is a great start. Not killing anyone else is good, too. Let’s see how you do with that, and then we’ll go from there.”

Loki broke into a smile, and it hit Tony right in the crotch. He shifted uncomfortably, crossing one leg over the other and forced himself to take an interest in the game. Eventually, New York scored a goal, and he whooped in delight. “That’s what I’m talking about...” he said proudly. He looked at Loki, who was observing him with a bewildered expression.

“What? Don’t you like football?”

“I... am not familiar with the rules, so it’s difficult for me to know when one of the competitors has gained an advantage. I take it your warriors have brought honor to their side?”

“Uh, yeah, they just scored against the Steelers. Don’t they have team sports in Asgard?”

“We have something like this, but it’s traditionally played using the head of a vanquished enemy in place of a leather ball.”

“Jeeze. No wonder you guys are so bloodthirsty.” Tony shook his head wonderingly, and the two finished their food in silence.

* * *

When the game was over, Loki stood up and faced Tony. “I thank you for this evening. It was... pleasant. However, I should allow you return to your solitude now. Goodbye.” He closed his eyes and drew in a breath in preparation of departure, but Tony put his hand on Loki’s arm.

“Wait! Hold on, hot shot, don’t run off just yet. You want to play some pool?”

Loki eyed him warily. “Forgive my suspicion, but we have already enjoyed your pool. Why would I wish to repeat the experience so soon?”

“No, no, I mean... It’s a game. Like, billiards? You know, little balls on a green felt table, you push ‘em into holes with a stick?” Tony pantomimed playing and Loki watched with interest.

“Show me.”

Tony led him to the game room and began racking up the balls. “It’s real simple, but it takes a little practice to get the balls to go where you want them. Here, I’ll run this round to give you an idea of what I’m talking about.” He cued up and broke the rack, then proceeded to drop ball after ball into the pockets.

Loki followed the balls’ trajectories, nodding. “I see. Very intriguing. May I try?”

“Sure. Now, look, here’s how you hold the cue...” Tony took Loki’s hands and placed them on the cue, noticing how cold they were. He stood beside him, demonstrating the proper stance to take when he took his shot, explaining the rules as he went.

Loki made an experimental stab at it, but the cue ball sailed past his target. His eyes narrowed. “Blast. That was... disappointing.”

“Now, it’s your first time, don’t get down on yourself. Here, let me show you something.” Tony stood directly behind Loki, leaning against his back and reaching around to put his hands on the god’s arms and guiding him in his next shot. Loki leaned forward, and somehow his butt pushed back against Tony’s crotch.

And, somehow, Tony’s erection jumped to life.

And, somehow, he sort of... pushed forward.

There was that horrible moment when he realized that Loki realized that he was hard. That tense moment when he wasn’t sure if Loki would punch him in the nose or cause fire and brimstone to rain down upon his oak-paneled designer game room. But, Loki merely looked over his shoulder and smiled. “Obviously, there are subtleties to this game of which I am not aware. Perhaps that green felt has a secondary purpose?”

“Aw, shit. I’m sorry, man. Damn it.” Tony backed away and strode out of the room, his breath coming hard. What the hell was he thinking? Or rather, what the hell was _little_ Tony thinking? Not that his dick had a stellar history of using wisdom and logic when it came to getting boners, but damn. This was kind of terrible.

Loki came out of the game room and went to stand in front of Tony. “Stark—it’s all right. A little drink of ale, a little exchange of warmth... It happens. Do not feel ashamed.” A very naughty grin crossed Loki’s face. “I rather liked it. Thor tells me that mortal women—well, _woman_ , he’s only had the one so far—are quite satisfactory companions in the bed chamber. I’d be most interested to find out if the same is true of your men.”

“Okay, now hold on, tough stuff—that was a mistake. I just, you know, had a lapse. Not a big deal—”

“It felt like it might be a rather delightfully big deal.”

“Ah, ha ha. You’re scary when you flirt, you know that?” Actually, that wasn’t even a little bit true. Loki’s eyes were a soft smoky emerald and the smile on his face was languid, teasing. Tony’s erection unhelpfully quivered against the fabric of his jeans, and Loki seemed to know exactly what it was doing, as his eyes trailed down Tony’s torso and landed right on the tent in the front of his pants.

Tony gave a choked little cough and turned his back. “I think you should go,” he said. Tony didn’t like saying the words, but the alternative was too freaky to contemplate.

“As you wish.” Loki shrugged and there was that thin air again.

Tony felt caught up short. He’d been prepared to argue; it was a little disheartening to find that the guy he’d just had a sort of intimate moment with, a guy who’d definitely seemed interested in him, would just disappear, _literally,_ at a single word of dismissal. But, of course, it was for the best. The last thing Tony needed was to have a roll in the hay with a goddamn alien being, one with mental health issues, to boot. Still, he felt a little... let down.

A little lonely.

But it was late, and he was tired, so he headed to his bedroom.

Where the goddamn alien being was lounging, naked again, on his bed.

 


	2. A Little Sex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut happens, and some conversation, too. Next Chapter will have Loki's POV.

Tony scowled at Loki. “I thought I told you to go.”

“Oh, you did. But you failed to stipulate where it was, exactly, that you wished me to go _to._ You should have been more specific.” The god flashed Tony a wicked grin.

“Yeah, well, this wasn’t what I had in mind. At all.”

“Mm. Well, that may be, but if you think your poor planning is going to infringe upon my having a good time, you’re mistaken. Now, stop hovering there like a constipated owl and join me.” Loki patted the bed enticingly.

Tony sneered defiantly. “No. Uh-uh, not gonna happen, not now, not ever. I’m serious—leave.”

“Oh, please. What’s a little sex between friends?” The god stared at Tony, clearly keeping the amusement off his face only with considerable effort. He then lazily raised one arm and draped it over his head, making Tony wonder when the hell he’d started getting turned on by armpit hair.

“We’re not friends,” Tony said sharply.

“Enemies, then.”

“We’re not that, either.” Tony suddenly felt tired. This whole evening had been one confusing roller coaster ride of unasked-for emotions, none of which had been at all helpful. He sat down on the edge of the bed, trying to sort through it all.

“Well, we’re something,” Loki mused. “And, I think we should take advantage of it. It’s been a long time since I’ve enjoyed pleasures of the flesh, and I suspect it’s the same for you. Or, am I wrong?” He reached out and trailed a finger downward between Tony’s shoulder blades, making him shudder with unwanted pleasure. That brought a chuckle from the god. “Ah, see? You quiver at the faintest touch. Have you no mate? That blonde woman—do you not bed her?”

“Pepper works for me, and leave her the hell out of this.”

“Works for you? A servant, then.”

Tony came out of his reverie to flash a shocked look at Loki. “Servant! Holy shit, dude, don’t ever let her hear you say that. Your ass’ll be knocked back to Asgard so fast your head’ll spin. No, she’s not a servant—she’s an employee, and she’s also my partner in a lot of stuff, she helps me... But, no, we’re not, you know... seeing each other.”

Loki was listening interestedly. “So, for nights on end, you’ve slipped into a cold bed with only your strong fingers to satisfy your needs. Tsk. I should think you’d be grateful for the opportunity I’m now affording you.”

Tony swiveled on the bed and fixed Loki with a dour look. “Listen—just because it’s been a while since I got laid doesn’t mean I’m going to jump your bones tonight, Reindeer Games. Now, as I was saying—get out.” But the words came out lacking the sting Tony intended.

Loki shrugged. “Very well, if you say so. Shame, though. I’ve been told I’m rather adept at this sort of thing. My one claim to athletic superiority.” He gave Tony a wink and made to scoot to the opposite side of Tony’s extra-wide bed, when Tony reached for him and clamped a hand on his arm. But, whatever he’d intended to say was forgotten when he touched the god’s bare flesh. Tony’s eyes widened in surprise.

“You’re cold.”

“Yes. Do you like it?”

“Huh?”

“My temperature runs several degrees below that of mortals—quite a boon to the necrophiliacs among you, or so I’ve been told. Are you one of those? If not, I can heat my skin as well, although it’s rather like holding your breath. I can’t do it for long without ill effect.” To Tony’s amazement, the flesh beneath his fingers warmed to a normal temperature. He looked into Loki’s eyes and saw deep concentration there. 

“Okay, that’s just weird. Stop it.”

“Oh, thank God,” Loki said in relief. “That really is a pain in the arse to maintain for more than a few seconds. Don’t worry, you’ll get used to the cold. Besides, it doesn’t extend to the places that... really count.” A rakish raise of an eyebrow underlined his meaning. “Come on, Stark, let’s do this.”

“No! I’m as open-minded as the next guy, but I’m not doin’ it with an extraterrestrial, and that’s all there is to it.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I thought you were the adventurous one.”

Loki’s expression was so mischievous, his pose so tantalizing, and the chilled touch of his skin so intriguing that Tony couldn’t help but break into a grin as he shook his head helplessly. “You know, this is a really bad idea, for a lot of reasons.”

“Such as?”

“Well, for one, aren’t you afraid we’ll make a little alien demi-god baby?”

Loki sidled close and nuzzled his face into Tony’s neck. When he spoke, his voice was a feral growl. “You’re saying Midgardian men can bear children? That’s remarkable. For, nothing would please me better than to fill you with my seed and plant my whelp in your belly—”

Tony grabbed him roughly by the shoulders and gave him a warning glare. “Whoa—if anybody’s planting anything anywhere it’ll be me, not you, and you can take that to the bank, get it?” He shoved Loki onto his back, crawled on top of him and crushed their mouths together, earning him a deep, delighted chuckle from Loki.

“So, you’ve decided to cooperate—very good. I didn’t take you for a fool, in spite of your regrettable humanity.”

Tony pulled back. Until that second, it hadn’t occurred to Tony that he might not have a choice in how this went. “That a threat?”

Loki’s lascivious expression faded and he looked puzzled. “No... I just meant... I didn’t think you’d decline an opportunity to enjoy yourself with one so willing.” Loki’s brows knit together. “What did you think I meant?”

“I... Nothing, never mind.” Tony dipped his head down to resume the kiss, but Loki put a firm hand on his shoulder, stopping him.

Neither spoke for a moment, their eyes locked together. Then Loki said softly, “You really don’t trust me, do you?”

Tony suddenly felt sheepish, but he answered honestly. “I guess not.” 

A dark look crossed Loki’s face. Tony felt him shift, attempting to wriggle out from under him. “I’m a lot of things, Stark, but I’m not a rapist. You were right, this is a very bad idea. Get off me, I’ll leave you in peace.”

“Wait!” Tony held him more firmly and ran a hand along the side of Loki’s face. “Don’t go. I’m sorry. But, you can’t blame me for being a little skittish, can you?”

Loki had a resentful set to his jaw, but it softened and he shook his head slightly. “No, I suppose not.”

“You have to give me some time.”

“Of course. I understand that.” He gave Tony a searching look. “I really do—I have much to atone for, and you’ve no reason to trust me as yet. It’s all right.”

Tony lay on his side and pulled Loki to him. They just lay there for a while, the silence seeming to heal them better than a torrent of useless words. Finally, Tony asked, “Are we okay?”

Loki roused himself, taking Tony into another deep kiss. He held Tony’s forehead to his own and said quietly, “Yes, Stark. We’re okay.” 

Everything felt lighter after that. After all, the god’s lanky body felt wonderful in Tony’s arms, and the chill of his skin mixed with Tony’s warmth created an intoxicating electricity between them, leaving Tony eager to move forward. 

“Good. Now, look, I think we ought to establish some ground rules before we—Hey!”

To Tony’s surprise, he found himself flipped over onto his back, and now Loki was on top of him, lying between his legs, a thick erection pressed into Tony’s denim-covered crotch. Tony yelped, and he pushed back, saying, “Oh, no you don’t. I told you, I’m a pitcher, not a catcher!” Loki playfully bit his neck, struggling to remain on top, but Tony gave a war cry and managed to work his way out of the powerful embrace. The two wrestled back and forth until the bedclothes were wrecked and they were both laughing and out of breath. Loki finally eased himself onto his back beside Tony. 

“All right, mortal. It really makes no difference to me who takes the dominant position.” He let his knees fall apart in a delicious gesture of good-natured submission. “Enter me.”

“Jesus-effing-Christ. Let me get some supplies.” Tony quickly skinned out of his clothes and then began scrabbling around in his nightstand drawer.

“Supplies? What sort of supplies?” Loki asked suspiciously.

“Oh, you know, the usual. Staples, note pads, pens, paper clips and such.” Tony looked back at Loki, expecting to see at least some appreciation for his wit, but Loki was frowning.

“I beg your pardon? Thor never mentioned needing such objects in order to copulate with a human.”

“No, no, I was kidding! Condoms, dude. Lube? Those kinds of supplies.”

“Condoms?”

Tony pulled a package out of his drawer and held it up for Loki’s inspection. The god examined it and comprehension dawned. “Oh! I see.” He shot another bewildered look in Tony’s direction. “But these are merely to prevent pregnancy. Surely you’re not so dull-witted as to not have noticed that I’m male. You needn’t worry—unlike your kind, Asgardian men are not capable of bearing offspring.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Oh, for God’s sake, neither are Earth guys! It’s to prevent disease, dumb ass. Don’t they have STDs on Asgard?”

“STDs...?”

“Sexually transmitted diseases. My God, this is the weirdest pre-sex conversation I’ve ever had in my life—and I’ve had some doozies...” Tony muttered to himself.

“We don’t, actually,” Loki noted. “And, we’re not susceptible to human ailments. You may use the condom device if you wish, but it’s certainly not necessary. And, I would think it would only detract from your enjoyment, would it not?”

“I’ll say. But... Yeah, okay, we’ll go bareback, what the hell.” He looked at the other item in his hand and asked, “You do use lube, though, right?”

Loki shrugged. “It may serve to... expedite matters, I suppose.”

“I would think so.” Tony went back to kissing his alien about-to-be lover and slipped a lube-slicked finger between his thighs, seeking Loki’s entrance. He gently spread the gel over the area and then slid his finger inside.

“What are you doing?” Loki asked crossly.

“Preparing you—I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I’m not some mewling virgin, Stark. You needn’t waste your time on such useless pursuits.” 

Tony pulled away and looked at the supremely irritated expression on Loki’s face.

“Jeeze, man, don’t they have foreplay where you come from?”

“They do. It’s called battling to the death.” At the sight of Tony’s stunned countenance, Loki’s near-murderous scowl disappeared and he broke into laughter. “I’m joking! Yes, of course we have foreplay. But, I’m impatient.” He buried his face in Tony’s neck, inhaling deeply of his scent as he again pressed his teeth into Tony’s soft flesh. “I want to take your manhood inside me. Now.” He lay back, his black hair fanning out onto the white linen of Tony’s pillow. “We can foreplay all you like... next time.” He smiled encouragingly and wrapped his legs around Tony’s waist, fitting himself against him.

Tony chuckled and obeyed his beautiful alien god with a good deep thrust.

**********

It wasn’t gentle. 

Loki was all spit and teeth and sharp nails digging into Tony’s back, scraping down his ribs, leaving hot scratches. Tony tried to keep things a little bit on the civilized side, but goaded by a constant patter of insults—“By the gods, Stark, is your pelvis broken? Is your puny cock destined to go no further than the mere shoreline of my entrance? Surely your balls contain something other than lukewarm dishwater—put some effort into it, man!”—Tony threw aside any semblance of concern for his lover’s well-being and fucked him into the goddamn mattress. Loki’s response was to plow his heels into the small of Tony’s back as he thrust his hips upward in counterpoint to Tony’s rapid-fire assault on his nether regions, keening as he gained purchase.

Loki finally shut up when Tony grabbed his cock and began brutally pumping him, sliding the cool skin up and down over what felt to Tony like a steel rod. Surprisingly quickly, the god made a little gasping sound and choked out, “Yes! There we are... Valhalla at last...” and he spilled a generous coating of hot spunk all over Tony’s hand.

“Good for you, space man,” Tony muttered. “Now it’s my turn.” Tony didn’t let up his pace—the skin on Loki’s chest and thighs was cool even after all that friction, but Loki hadn’t been kidding about certain other internal parts of him running hot. Inside, Loki was snug and slick and heated and he warmed Tony like his channel was lined with tiger balm, but it wasn’t unpleasant at all—just different. 

Mind-blowingly different.

Tony shot deep inside Loki and then collapsed on top of him, panting and gasping to fill his depleted lungs. Loki gave him a shove and he fell beside him, lying limp on his back in a sated, boneless mess.

“That... was freakin’ awesome,” Tony eventually rasped.

“It wasn’t bad,” Loki grudgingly agreed. “Better than I expected, really.”

“Oh, please. I bet your ass’ll be sore for days.”

Loki snickered. “I’ll have you know, I have amazing powers of resilience. But yes, I imagine I’ll be thinking of you every time I sit down for at least a few of your mortal hours.” He cast a sideways glance at Tony and saw that Tony was looking at him with an appreciative leer. When their eyes met, they both broke into laughter. 

Tony reached for Loki’s hand and then rolled onto his side and kissed him; Loki’s lips were icy, but the inside of his already well-explored mouth was hot and steamy, and Tony languidly wondered what that insane combination would feel like wrapped around his cock, assuming alien gods were ever inclined to give mortals blow jobs.

Well, Loki had hinted at the possibility of a next time, so Tony was content to wait to find out.

But, after Loki’s breathing had returned to normal, he rolled off the bed and stood up with that pre-disappearance aura in the air around him.

Tony stared in consternation. “Where the hell are you going?”

“I believe our business has reached a satisfactory conclusion.”

“Our _business?”_

Loki grinned. “I had to determine if your moniker, ‘Man of Iron,’ is appropriate. And, so it is...”

“Ha-ha. So, you were just using me all along?”

“Oh, don’t be such a pathetic child. My time in this realm is long, can you blame me for taking advantage of a distraction when it presents itself? Anyway, it’s not as if you didn’t have a bit of fun, yourself.”

“I guess.” Tony took advantage of Loki’s little speech to admire his bare body; his attention was firmly on the god when he produced the clothes he’d been wearing earlier and began to dress. He pulled on a pair of silk briefs that clung to his bony hips and outlined his thick cock and heavy balls as if they’d been painted with high-gloss latex. He put his arms into the black t-shirt and let it slide slowly over his head, gradually coming down to cover the smattering of fine black hairs trailing between his pecs, over the pert nipples that Tony hadn’t had the opportunity to lick and nibble the way he’d wanted. The shirt rolled down over his taut belly, and came to rest just above the line of his underwear, leaving a tantalizing bit of bare flesh exposed and vulnerable, making Tony want to pull him to him and bite it.

Loki lifted his trousers and pulled them up slowly over his long legs, and Tony watched entranced as the knobby knees and finely-muscled thighs he’d so recently found himself thrusting between disappeared. He was getting hard all over again, when it occurred to him that the goddamn alien god was doing a reverse strip tease for him and was about to leave him in a thoroughly frustrated state of blue-balls like he hadn’t experienced since his teen years.

“So, you’re just going to run off.”

“I thought I would, yes. Wouldn’t want to weary you with my presence.” He’d fastened his trousers and belt, and was now running his hands through his bed-ravaged hair, attempting to tame it.

Tony gave him a scornful sneer. “Got some outer-space nymphet waiting for you at home, do you?”

Loki laughed. “Hardly. I’m quite alone, these days.”

“Speaking of home, where do you hang your hat in your off time? When you’re not zipping through the ether or annoying the hell out of the occasional billionaire, I mean.”

“Nowhere. Everywhere. My ‘home’ is in Asgard, but I’m not allowed there anymore.” He sounded matter-of-fact, but Tony thought he caught a tinge of wistfulness in his tone. 

“Right, Thor mentioned that. By the way, you’re not going to, uh, clue him in about this, are you? About me rocking your world to a mortal beat?”

Loki regarded him for a moment. “Why? Ashamed of giving in to your baser instincts with another male? I gather that’s no more acceptable here than in Asgard, if not less so.”

“No, I’m not ashamed of anything. I just...” Tony looked down at his hands, considering his next words carefully. “Thor might spill the beans to the wrong person. I have a feeling S.H.I.E.L.D. wouldn’t like knowing that you’re on the loose inside Earth’s atmosphere again. They might... take action. Which could, you know, be inconvenient for you and me, both.”

Loki stood with his hands on his hips, his head cocked to the side. “I don’t fear them. Of course...”

“What?”

“Odin made it very clear to me that I’m to avoid engaging in any sort of conflict with other beings. I suppose you have valid concerns. But, I’m not telling Thor a bloody thing about this for the simple reason that with whom I choose to share a bed is none of his damned business.”

Tony gave a knowing smirk. “Ah, the love between two brothers, is there anything more beautiful.”

“Fuck you, Stark, and thank you for a lovely evening. Perhaps we’ll do it again some time.” 

“Sure. We’ll get Thai food. You know what that is?”

Loki smirked, and said in a mocking tone, “Why, no. I’m sure you’ll be happy to teach me, though.” He perched on the edge of the bed. “Just as you so kindly ‘introduced’ me to the joys of pepperoni pizza and Midgardian billiards... So very sweet of you, Man of Iron, taking me in hand like that.” 

Tony frowned. “Wait a minute... What are you saying?”

Loki laughed aloud. “Stark... Did you honestly think I’ve never had pizza before? And, as for playing pool, I could beat you on your best day with one arm broken and the other tied behind my back... without magic.” He gave Tony a pitying smile and leaned forward to kiss him on the forehead. “Perhaps next time you can guide me in the intricacies of checkers, or catch, or tic-tac-toe. Whatever you choose, I’ll be looking forward to it.” With that, he de-materialized, his laughter hanging in the air like the Cheshire cat’s grin.

Tony threw a pillow across the room. “I hate him...” he muttered. “He’s a good lay, but I hate him.” He clicked on the TV, feeling a combination of relief, aggravation, and self-disgust. 

Oh, and loneliness. He forgot loneliness.

He was on that damned emotional roller coaster ride again, and Loki was the fucking ticket-taker.


	3. Just Two Seconds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's POV, then a night out with Tony where they of course run into a couple of familiar faces.

Loki lay perched on the headboard of Tony's bed. There wasn't enough room, so part of him inhabited the wall. This would have looked odd if Tony had been able to see him. But moving the molecules of his body in an erratic pattern to fool the eye of both living beings and electronic Midgardian devices was an art he'd perfected in his youth; he couldn't do it indefinitely, but long enough to suit his purposes, usually.

For now, he simply wanted to observe Stark in the light of this newfound situation. The billionaire was handsome, he had to give him that. He had a boyish quality about him that was quite appealing as well, although there was nothing boyish about what he'd done to Loki's willing body earlier that evening. In spite of Loki's taunts, he'd been impressed with Stark's ability to fuck him into a state of absolute uselessness.

Now, the man was sound asleep, lying chilled and naked on top of the wrecked covers, the infernal television machine blasting some idiotic sales pitch for some idiotic product that was probably actually dangerous to the frail human constitution. He glanced at the wretched thing and saw it going dark and silent, and it did.

Then, Loki was standing beside Stark and he saw him lying warm under the covers, and he was. A soft smile crossed Loki's face and he warmed his hand and lay it on the man's cheek for just a moment. He then silently strode into the living room, where the pizza box, dirty plates, and beer glasses still sat on the coffee table. He saw them put away, and they were.

He sat down on the couch, listening to the room. There were low hums and the ticking of a clock. He could hear the city outside, a comforting sort of rumble even in such a secluded chamber high inside of Stark Tower.

Loki liked it, liked hearing the noises. He remembered doing this back home in Asgard, sitting still and listening, letting the jumbled thoughts doing battle in his mind be soothed by the familiar sounds of his world—servants bustling, his parents talking, Thor and his friends laughing and shouting inanely outside his window.

He missed that, missed having a place to be.

Now, he had the entire universe to travel, and not one place to lay his head that he could call his own.

Not one being that would vouch for him, that would claim him. Well, Thor... But, that was only out of some misguided sense of guilt.

Stark was the one human he'd found intriguing thus far, and not for the reasons that Midgardians seemed to find him so desirable. Oh, he was sexy, yes, confident, he looked good in his clothes, but there were many like that. His money seemed to make people, male and female, weak in the knees, but it neither impressed nor attracted Loki. What need had he of coin when he could conjure anything he fancied? Anything but a home, anything but someone...

He shook his head irritably and shifted in his seat. A little jab of pain caught him by surprise, and he laughed—Stark was right, he'd be thinking of him for a good little while following their tryst. He didn't mind. It had been fun, seducing the billionaire. Too easy perhaps, but fun.

Then, of course, he'd had to piss him off, he thought with a rueful chuckle. Well, that was his way—anything good or nice or happy in his life was soon ruined, driven off by his mischievous inclinations, by his cursed tongue so quick to betray himself. He thought of Tony's words—I hate him—and a little twinge of regret rustled in his gut. Normally, hatred was good, it meant he'd been noticed, it meant that he had some small bit of power, even if just enough to make a common mortal throw a pillow across a bedchamber.

But, somehow, it wasn't really what he'd hoped for.

Wasn't what was needed to claim a place in the Iron Man's heart, or even on his couch, not really.

Not for long.

Loki stood up and glanced out the window into the sky.

And then, the air grew thin.

And Tony stirred and reached beside himself, startled awake by the empty bed. It took a moment before he remembered that Loki had already gone.

His cheek felt pleasantly warm, and he wondered when it was that he'd crawled under the covers and turned off the TV, and then he remembered that he hadn't.

And, he smiled a little before going back to sleep.

* * *

The next time it happened, Tony didn't think it ever would.

For the first few days after Loki'd teleported out of his bedroom, Tony had that sense of anticipation that comes with the belief that someone you connected with is going to contact you—that, at some point, there's going to be a welcome knock at the door, a phone call, a text, an email.

A whirlwind in the middle of your kitchen.

But, there wasn't one, and there kept not being one, and Tony cursed the Asgardians' habit of eschewing technological devices such as cell phones. "Damn it, Loki, what's the matter—worried about brain cancer? Or, just don't want to get locked into a long-term contract? I can get you a pay-as-you-go deal from Walmart!"

He did that for a while, talking to the air as if the goddamn alien god were right there in the room with him.

But, it didn't help. Loki didn't show up, didn't give any hint that he was in the world at all.

And, as the days turned into weeks, Tony got busy. That sense of anticipation turned to a die-hard wisp of hope, and then to disappointment, and then he'd forced himself to forget about it.

He told himself that it was for the best. The last thing he needed was an extraterrestrial boyfriend, right? Especially one who'd tried to take over the planet.

_And, maybe it hadn't even happened, did you ever think of that?_  he asked himself one night, glass of scotch in hand. Maybe he was just drunk all the time now. Maybe someone put something in his drink, or maybe he was suffering the effects of some toxic chemical he'd been exposed to somewhere along the way, maybe even in his own lab. He made a mental note to ask Pep to take a blood sample from him and send it off for testing...

And then, one day, he turned around as he was looking for his stash of take-out menus, and there he was.

Lounging on his couch.

He had a bandana tied around his head and was wearing a snug black t-shirt, a leather jacket, tight jeans and motorcycle boots.

Yeah, motorcycle boots.

Tony repressed a gasp of delighted excitement, forcing himself into a nonchalant pose as he regarded Loki with a sneer on his lips.

"Well, well. Where the hell have  _you_  been?"

"I beg your pardon?"

The innocent expression on Loki's face was utterly disarming. Which of course was like waving a red flag in front of a bull to Tony. His nonchalance evaporated and he narrowed his eyes and snapped, "You've been gone a  _month._  That's over 43,000 minutes! You couldn't take two seconds to let me know you were okay?"

Loki frowned, apparently giving Tony's outburst deep consideration before responding, "I'm sorry, I thought you were Tony Stark. Have I been conversing with a fourteen-year-old girl by mistake?"

"Oh, no you don't. Don't you  _dare._  Don't you dare act like I'm overreacting because I'm pissed that you didn't call or come by, or send a fucking carrier pigeon, or whatever the hell it is you people do to let other people know you're not  _dead—"_

"The absurdity of your concerns aside, may I point out that I'm here now? Shouldn't that count for something?"

"Yeah, you're here. Great. I guess the only question is  _why?_  What the hell do you want from me now?"

"Dinner," Loki said mildly.

Tony's brows shot up.  _"Dinner?"_

"Yes, I want you to take me to dinner. And, someplace nice, none of your damn pizza parlors or hamburger joints. Not that they don't have their charms, but I'm really in the mood to be pampered a bit tonight..." He gave his long limbs a lazy serpentine stretch and looked up at Tony entreatingly. "All right?"

Tony gave a bark of laughter.  _"Pampered...?_  After your charming little exit from my bedroom? After you lied to me? That's rich. Get out."

Loki made a sad face. "Oh, dear. You really are upset with me, aren't you? I'm so sorry for my behavior." He strode over to stand in front of Tony. "Don't be angry, Tony. Please?" He gripped Tony's face in his hands and kissed him. It was a hot, wet kiss, and Tony reflexively ran his hands over Loki's lean frame, landing them on his cute little butt and squeezing.  _Amazing,_  he thought. Amazing how someone so... _infuriating_  could feel so right and perfect in his arms. Well, tough. Fool me once, and all that.

"Hey, stop it." Tony pulled back and grabbed Loki's thin wrists, wrangling him away from himself. "This isn't going to work. I told you to get out and I meant it. Go."

Loki bit his lip. "Really? There's nothing I can do to... gain your forgiveness?" He slowly dropped to his knees in front of Tony, his eyes huge as he stared up at the billionaire, posed in supplication. He never broke eye contact as his nimble fingers began unfastening Tony's belt. Tony thought he might have a tiny little brain aneurism from the amount of control it took for him to abruptly pull Loki up by his arms, but he did it, a grunt of exasperation underlying his frustration.

"Now, cut it out! I know your game, space-dude. You're just trying to manipulate me. But I'm not going to let you, 'cause I don't need this shit."

"Manipulate you?" Loki jerked away and pulled the bandana off his head, leaving lank strands of hair to fall into his eyes. He pushed them back and snarled, "Oh, of course. I was once a prince of Asgard, you know. A god. I even ruled for a short time. And yet, here I am, attempting to manipulate a mere mortal into sharing a meal with me. How? By falling on my knees and  _debasing_  myself to him. Pathetic, isn't it? Very clever of you, seeing me for what I am. And, also so kind, rubbing it in my face this way. Well, don't worry. I won't trouble you again." With a cynical huff, Loki turned, and Tony could feel he was about to disappear.

"Wait!"

Loki paused, and then turned around. "What?"

"First of all, I don't give a damn who your daddy was, and yeah, you were a prince, but you were also a criminal, and guess what—I don't give a crap about that either. All I know is that I like you. I don't know why, you're obviously nothing but an enormous pain in the ass, but I do. And, if you would just be honest and quit pulling this kind of bullshit on me, I think we could get to be... something. Like you said that night."

He went up to Loki and put his hands on his shoulders. "And, by the way, much as I would love for you to do that thing you were about to do a few minutes ago—if you think I'd want it, knowing it made you feel debased? We've got a problem.

"And if you think I would ever  _ask_  you to do something that makes you feel that way...? We've got an even bigger problem. So..." Tony rubbed a thumb over Loki's cheek, thinking of the way he'd woken in the night to feel a warm, invisible touch on his own. "...you tell me. Do we have a problem?"

Loki's stare burned into Tony's eyes, but then he shook his head slightly. "No. We have no problem."

A slow smile crossed Tony's face. "Good. Now, about dinner—I've got news for you, slugger, I can't take you to a five-star restaurant with you dressed like that. Not that it isn't hot—you're totally making me hard, here—but you look like you're ready to rock out at an Ozzy concert and that's frowned upon in our better Midgardian establishments."

Loki raised an eyebrow. "Ozzy?"

"Don't give me that shit. You know who he is."

"Oh, yes. The fellow who bites the heads off of bats. I quite like him."

"Yeah."

"Well, I have other clothes."

"Okay, but there's something else. I'm Tony Stark. I go out to dinner, my picture ends up in the paper, along with whoever it is I'm dining with. We can't have that. All I need is for one of my buds to notice that I'm hanging out with the guy who caused a little minor interplanetary warfare, and then to let Fury in on it—"

Loki held up a hand. "I understand. You're saying a disguise of some sort is needed."

"Well, yeah. But, it's gotta be good, no fake mustache and Groucho glasses, you know."

Loki looked as if he were going to ask a question, but thought better of it. "Give me a minute."

Tony watched him stalk off. Puzzled, he followed and saw Loki duck into the bathroom. _Huh,_  Tony thought. Loki wasn't exactly shy about changing clothes in front of him, and he wasn't even sure that the Asgardian ever even  _used_  the bathroom, to be honest, but he shrugged and went back to sit on the couch. Several minutes passed by and Tony began flipping through a magazine. After a while, he checked his watch and found that he'd been sitting there for nearly half an hour.

"Oh, shit," he thought.  _Did Loki just dump him?_  If he did...

Tony got up and returned to the bathroom. "Hey, Reindeer Games—I'm sure you're pretty enough, let's go!"

He heard Loki moving around and in another minute, the door swung open.

Tony's jaw dropped.

Standing before him was the most striking woman he'd ever seen.

* * *

She was tall; her hair was blonde and fell in soft waves around her face. She wore a clingy red dress that was sexy as hell, but not in a slutty way. It hugged her perfect little firm high breasts—size of oranges, just enough to fill each palm, exactly like Tony liked 'em—and a tiny waist. Large green eyes dusted with fawn colored shadow and framed by long black lashes peered questioningly at Tony.

"Is this all right?" she asked in Loki's voice, breaking the spell. Tony blinked.

"Shit."

"Does that mean yes?"

"Uh... yeah. That's... pretty good. No one'll recognize you now."

"Good. Let's go, I'm starving."

"How did you—"

Loki raised a perfectly tweezed eyebrow. "If you want details, I'll explain after dinner."

Tony nodded and followed his statuesque date to the door. He studied Loki's ass intently, unable to detect the slightest hint of panty line. "What're you wearing under there?"

Loki paused. "Come here."

Tony came up behind him. Without turning, Loki reached back and took Tony's hand. He pulled up his skirt and guided Tony's hand underneath it. Tony touched delicious silk over Loki's slim, well-muscled thigh. He ran his hand upward, but Loki stopped him with an iron grip before he made it to the curve of his buttock.

"That's enough for now," Loki said with a soft grin. "More later. After dinner." He turned enough for Tony to see his dark eyes glance at him under his lashes. "When we're in bed."

The sound Tony made was something between a purr and a hopeless groan, and he had to take a second before having Jarvis inform Happy that he needed to bring the car around right away.

* * *

The restaurant was crowded as they'd arrived at the peak of the dinner hour, but Tony simply said a word to the maitre-d' and they were immediately shown to a table. An appetizer appeared and wine was quickly poured for them. There didn't seem to be any reporters around, and the dinner patrons were all rich and snooty enough to barely take note of the Stark presence. That was good, Tony thought—that boded well for a peaceful evening.

Still, Tony felt a twinge of unease—Loki didn't look at all like himself, but it was still  _him_  under that makeup and hair and dress. And, as far as Tony could tell, he certainly hadn't changed his personality. The horror of possibly running into someone he knew—and Tony knew a  _lot_  of people—was that Loki would be his usual snarky, pain-in-the-ass self and create some kind of incident.

Which, Tony was pretty sure, would not go well.

But, they were each given a menu, and Loki was occupied with perusing his, and nobody was paying them any real attention, so Tony had almost allowed that last little muscle in his stomach to relax when a familiar female voice exclaimed, "Tony!"

He looked up to see Pepper standing at their table, with Bruce Banner at her side.

"Pep!" he said, rising to his feet. "And, Doc! Hey! What're you doing here?"

Banner smiled. "I'm helping Miss Potts organize a humanitarian effort in Africa. We've been working all day; she was kind enough to offer to take me to dinner."

"Yeah, that's my girl. And, gosh, I'm not at all hurt that I wasn't included." Tony gave Pepper a cheery smile. She was smiling too, but her eyes were on Loki, who looked up from his menu with a blank expression. Pepper turned her gaze back to Tony.

"I did invite you, Tony. Remember? You said you were too tired to go out." She glanced back at Loki, and then added, "In fact, you said you were going to stay in. Alone." She broadened her smile and nodded at Loki. "Yet, here you are! Who's this?"

"Oh! Uh... This is my friend, uh—"

"Lola." Loki half-rose from his chair and held out a beautifully manicured hand. His voice was his own, but soft, with a hint of an American Southern accent. Pepper shook his hand, and then Tony pulled himself together enough to continue with the introductions.

"Uh... Yeah! This is Lola. Lola, this is Pepper Potts and Bruce Banner."

Banner reached for Loki's hand. "Pleased to meet you, ma'am. Have you known Tony long?"

"Oh, about a year now. We met at some conference or other. I always give him a ring when I'm in town, but we hardly ever get together, we're both so busy. Tonight was just... good luck."

"Right." Tony took a deep breath; to his relief, Loki didn't appear to be riled up by the man whose alter-ego had pretty well smashed the heck out of him a little over a year ago, and neither Bruce nor Pep seemed to have the slightest idea that Loki was anyone but yet another of Tony's eye-candy one-night stands.

A waiter had come to stand apologetically by their table. "I can come back, Mr. Stark," he said.

"No, no, please, go ahead and order," Pepper said. "I need to get Bruce back to his hotel room. It was lovely meeting you, Lola. You two have a nice evening." She gave Tony a slight smirk and then she and Bruce moved away, heading toward the exit.

Tony gave an audible sigh as he watched them leave. "Whew." He turned back and picked up his menu. He and Loki ordered, and once the waiter left, Tony reached out and squeezed Loki's hand. "Thank you."

"For what?" Loki asked in his normal voice.

"For putting on that little act. I don't think either of them suspected anything at all."

"Of course not." Loki got a bit of a dreamy look on his face. "Although, it was extremely tempting to... What do you think Banner would have done if he'd realized who I was?" he asked slyly.

"I... don't want to think about it."

"Oh, I do." Loki chuckled as he placed his napkin on his lap. "It would have been... most entertaining."

"You find repeatedly being slammed into concrete entertaining?"

Loki shrugged. "Oh, not so much. Been there, done that and all. But, he is a sight to behold in that state, don't you think?"

"You just concentrate on your calamari, young lady. No bringing out Hulk-boy tonight, understand me?"

"Yes, sir," Loki said, his eyes glittering emerald. He squeezed back on Tony's hand. "I guess I'll have to settle for whatever you decide to entertain me with tonight, eh?"

"I'll do my best to keep you from getting bored."

"I know you will." Loki took a sip of wine and then slowly ran his tongue around his delicately painted red lips. "I can hardly wait."

Tony thought of the slender thigh he'd had clasped in his hand for such a brief moment, and felt the napkin on his lap elevate with his erection.

* * *

Back at Stark Tower, Tony was positively strung out with lust. Loki had teased him mercilessly all evening—seductive looks, a hand on his thigh, a foot brushing against his calf, an unending string of double entendres that caused Tony to choke on his drink more than once. Just the way Loki moved was erotic; catlike grace with just a hint of naughtiness that was making Tony hot under the collar, although whether it was Loki's feminine appearance that was getting to him, or the fact that Loki was male—beautifully, deliciously male—underneath it all that drove him insane.

Assuming that he was indeed  _still_  male.

Tony was under no illusions—he knew Loki could change his form to be anything he wanted. Not knowing exactly what he'd chosen to have in store for Tony once they finally made it to his bedroom was about as titillating a proposition as Tony had ever encountered.

He couldn't fucking wait.

Once they crossed the threshold of his bed chamber, Loki dropped his seduction act and grabbed Tony in a passionate embrace. He kissed him and let Tony run his hands over his body, up over his breasts, down over his hips and ass, but as soon as Tony attempted to slip his hands under Loki's clothes, he'd twist away with a reproving  _tsk_.

"Now, now. Patience. Come, let's get comfortable." Loki lay down on Tony's bed.

"Jeeze, you're gorgeous."

"Yes? You like me this way?"

"Yeah..." Tony couldn't keep his hands off Loki's tits. He squeezed the immeasurably soft but firm little mounds, his breath was coming fast. "These real?" he rasped.

Loki put his hands on Tony's and sought his eyes. Once they were both still, he asked simply, "Do you want them to be?" It wasn't a leading question; it was as matter-of-fact as if he'd asked Tony if he wanted mustard on his sandwich.

Yet, Tony felt his answer was kind of important. It would have been easy to say, "Oh, hell, yeah!" Would have been out-of-this-world weird and sexy and bizarrely exciting, like nothing he'd ever experienced, he knew that. But, there was something in Loki's eyes that his words, his voice, didn't betray. And, Tony thought long and hard about his answer.

"No." He said it almost without realizing it, but he knew he meant it. "No, Loki. I like the guy I sat on the couch with, the one that ate pizza and watched football with me. The one I went to bed with. You're a damn knockout like this, but it's not you. I want... you. Okay?"

Tony thought Loki looked a little surprised, but then he smirked. He rummaged around in the front of his dress and pulled out a pair of silicon falsies."You're so easy, Stark. Did you really think they were the real thing?"

Tony leaned forward and kissed him. "No. I knew _you_  knew you didn't have to fake it for me."

"Oh..." A tranquil expression came over Loki's face and he lay back. "Well, yes. Of course I did. Do you want me to... change?" He gestured at his makeup and hair.

"Yeah. All except the dress, and whatever it is you've got on under it. That's the kind of kinky fun I can get into." Tony grinned and Loki grinned back. He got up and went to Tony's bathroom. When he came out, he was back to Loki of the black hair and skinny body, but still clad in the snug red dress. He lay down again and Tony wasted no time pulling the skirt up around Loki's waist.

Revealing black thong panties and a lacy garter belt that held up sheer black silk stockings.

"Oh, fuck," Tony said with a wolf-whistle of appreciation. He slowly unsnapped the garters and slithered the silken hose down one leg, kissing along the inside of Loki's pale thigh as he went. He gave the other leg the same treatment, prudishly ignoring the swelling bulge in the front of Loki's underwear. He heard a low curse and Loki started to reach into the panties, but Tony caught his hand.

"Uh-uh, gorgeous. You don't touch that pretty cock of yours. Tonight, that belongs to me, along with everything else below the equator, and I don't want you to touch my stuff,  _comprende?"_

Loki rolled his eyes. "You really are a tiresome bastard, aren't you? All right, as you wish. Hands off." Loki was propped up on his elbows and he raised both hands in defeat before plopping down flat on his back. "But you do intend to offer me a bit of genital stimulation  _sometime_  in this millennium, don't you? Because, if not, I noticed Banner eyeing me with some interest. I wonder what he's like in the sack? Do you suppose he can fuck as the beast? Do you suppose anyone could survive it if he did? I— _Oh!"_

Loki's highly annoying musings were cut short when Tony yanked down the panties and buried Loki's cock in his mouth.

 


	4. Tony Incenses the God, Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bit of smut, Tony/Loki sass-fest, Pissed-off Loki.

Tony tended to Loki with long licks, teasing nips, and a lot of good deep oral action, which was, by the way, not his usual M.O. 

At _all_.

In fact, he normally wouldn’t be caught dead going down on another guy—he didn’t mind it with women, and he loved receiving BJs so much he really, really didn’t care if the giver was male or female—but Loki was in some rare category that went beyond gender, kind of the way Tony didn’t like champagne, but found Dom Perignon absolutely delicious. So, when the panties came down and Loki’s member popped out, impudent, half-hard and proud, putting it in his mouth just seemed to come naturally to Tony.

As did all the other lascivious things his mouth decided to do, once it was in there.

After a while, Loki gave a low hungry groan, impatiently thrusting up past Tony’s comfort zone, and Tony irritably pulled back. “Hey, Shakespeare, that’s rude. Can’t you just lie there and appreciate what I’m doing for you for three goddamn minutes?”

“I’ll appreciate you once you’ve actually begun to fellate me... rather than this transparently facile attempt to... to merely shut me up...” In spite of his scornful words, Loki’s voice had a bit of a happily strained quality to it. Tony looked up, amused.

“What the hell’s wrong with what I’ve been doing?” Tony continued to use his hand to maintain attention to the task of driving Loki to distraction.

Loki cleared his throat, trying to sound as blasé as possible. “Nothing, if you’re attempting to seal an envelope or... Or, affix a sheet of green stamps to a page.” He managed to smother a whimper of pleasure.

“Green stamps! How do you even know about green stamps?” 

Tony’s hand never stopped, and Loki now gave a hum of appreciation, but raised himself on his elbows so he could look at Tony properly. “Thor is... inordinately fond of ancient Midgardian television programs. He recently forced me to—by the gods, Stark, continue doing that—to watch hours of something called ‘TV Land,’ while Jane Foster was out of town.” Another groan escaped before he could add, “In return, I intend to injure him most grievously at the first opportunity.”

Tony gave up on his efforts and laughed at the mental image of Loki being held captive by his big brother and forced to watch reruns of “The Brady Bunch.”  
“I don’t blame you, kiddo. But, say, if you’re so dissatisfied with the level of service I’ve been providing, maybe you should show me how it’s done.” Tony slid off the bed and undressed, and then lay down again, waggling his member invitingly.

Loki gave a huff of frustration. “Stark! You bastard... Well, fine. I suppose it’s time someone demonstrated a bit of proper technique for you.”

“Oh, I guess you’ve got skills in this department, eh?”

“I didn’t earn the moniker ‘Loki Silver-tongue’ for my verbal abilities alone.” With a long-suffering sigh, Loki pulled the dress over his head and then divested himself of bra, garter belt, panties, and stockings—much to Tony’s regret, but he didn’t protest as Loki lay down beside him, gripped the base of his cock in his long elegant fingers and settled into position so that he could comfortably take Tony in his mouth.

Tony had spent a lot of time imagining what Loki’s icy lips and steamy warm mouth would feel like on that particular part of his anatomy, but Tony’s imagination had poorly prepared him for the kind of pleasure he was instantly plunged into as Loki began his efforts.

It was insane, and when Loki gently rolled Tony’s balls in his hand, Tony was sure he was a goner. But Loki abruptly pulled back and gave him a chastising look. “Oh, no. Look at this—” he said, gesturing at Tony’s straining erection. “Do you really think I’m going to let it go to waste after doing all that work? Honestly, you should look into one of those Midgardian impotence aids, don’t they sell little pumps to compensate for this unfortunate condition of yours?”

Tony gasped, “Okay, you need to get back to what you were doing, smart-ass, and by the way, my dick works just fine... At least it does when I don’t have a goddamn extraterrestrial yammering on about some bullshit or other—”

Loki instantly pulled away and sat up. “Oh, forget it. I’ve lost interest by now. Where’s the television remote? I’m in the mood for something intellectually stimulating for a change, perhaps a bit of ‘I Love Lucy’ or ‘Three’s Company.’ Or how about ‘The Beverly Hillbillies? That’s more on your level, I would think, given your current standard of living. Also, the sociological overtones in that one are quite interesting, I’m sure you can amply relate to it—Ackkk!”

Loki’s jibe was cut off when Tony yanked him to him and buried his tongue in his mouth. He lay Loki down and kissed him, warm and wet and not exactly rough, and after a moment, Loki’s entire body seemed to give in and mold itself to Tony’s. For all the sass he’d had to put up with from his alien-god lover, Tony was ready to fall into worship of the long limbs wrapped around him, the strong muscles rippling under him, and the sweetness of the kiss Loki was now bestowing upon him. He ran his hand over Loki’s back and something about it struck his passion-addled mind as strange—he was warm. 

Loki felt warm.

“Hey,” Tony whispered. “Are you doing that thing?”

“What thing?” Loki whispered back.

“You know—that thing, where you warm your skin up for me.”

Loki tilted his head and frowned, puzzled. “No—do I feel warm to you?”

Tony nodded.

Loki shrugged. “I have no idea what’s causing that.”

“Are you sick?” Tony put his palm on Loki’s forehead, looking worried.

“No, I’m fine. What are you doing?”

“Oh—that’s how we check for fever here on Midgard.”

“Ah. No, I’m fine, Tony.” Loki kissed him again. “Stop worrying and make love to me.”

“But—”

Loki’s eyes narrowed darkly. “It must be the heat of unsatisfied passion that warms my skin. I trust you’re going to stop fretting and do something about that? Or must I summon the televising device from its sleep after all?”

Tony chuckled. “Okay, okay, chill out. I’m on it.” He returned to the kiss he’d interrupted, tenderly cradling Loki in his arms as he teased and caressed and prepared him with gentle fingers. 

Loki whimpered at the sensations; for a moment, it seemed he was unsure how to respond to Tony’s caring treatment. But then he pulled away and reached for the lube Tony had left on the nightstand. He poured some into his palm and slathered it onto Tony’s erection, and then lifted himself to straddle his lover. He reached behind himself and guided Tony inside, his head thrown back, dark hair falling around his shoulders. 

Tony couldn’t help but notice that Loki’s posture was as haughty and regal as always, in spite of the fact that he was allowing himself to be penetrated by a mere human being. Tony started to razz him about that, but he stopped as it occurred to him that this was who Loki was—a true prince, once a king, always a member of royalty, no matter how low his present circumstances might be. His manner was not an affectation, but a product of his birth and his rearing. 

The thought was a little bewildering to Tony, native of a country long unaccustomed to the very notion of being ruled, and he found himself studying Loki’s features with fascination. Then, all thought was forgotten as the god slowly lowered himself along Tony’s thick member until he was seated; his slim thighs gripped Tony’s waist, and Tony squeezed back affectionately. They stared into each other’s eyes, and Loki smiled benevolently.

I got no problem being your subject, Prince of Asgard-baby, Tony thought, grinning back. Rule me hard, sweetheart...

Loki then began rocking his hips, centering his energy on their joined bodies, and that made Tony moan as every nerve suddenly ignited—it was stunning, feeling himself inside that slick, clasping heat. He now watched Loki’s beautiful face, the flutter of dark lashes, his mouth slightly open, a tinge of pink on his pale cheeks. It felt so good, not just the sex, but having Loki want him, not for his body alone, but for his thoughts, his feelings... hell, his jokes. For a moment, Tony thought his heart would burst with joy; this was new, this was different, something so strong that he felt sure nothing and no one could ever take it away, almost as if...

Almost as if someone had cast a spell upon him.

...Well, shit, he thought. Of course. The revelation jolted Tony just as that pre-orgasmic heat was reaching his core. Magic... That would _totally_ explain how he, playboy Tony Stark, could have fallen so hard for another dude, which, normally, would not happen, I mean, sure, he’d had man-crushes before, but this was ridiculous... 

It would also explain how he could have so easily come to overlook Loki’s previous villainous behavior, what with the killing and the maiming and the wanton destruction and all. While he would like to think he was big enough of a person to respect Loki’s rehabilitation, it was still kind of a hard thing to just ignore, and here he was, hardly ever even thinking about it at all anymore. 

Not when Loki was in his arms, for sure.

Tony frowned. He looked up at the god, who was now shifting forward, about to bend to kiss Tony, and without a fraction of a second’s consideration, Tony blurted out, “Hey—have you done some kind of magic mumbo-jumbo thing on me or something?”

Loki paused, every muscle stilled. He looked into Tony’s eyes, bewildered. “What?” 

“You know, like, an enchantment spell to make me go all gaga over you? I mean, I guess it’s okay, it feels nice, I’d just like to know what I’m dealing with here, deprived of free will and all, and I—”

Abruptly, Loki rolled off and sat beside Tony, facing him. He had a look on his face that Tony seriously didn’t know how to interpret, and they were both quiet for a moment. Then, Loki began speaking matter-of-factly, sounding like a professor giving a lecture.

“There are two predominant types of enchantments having to do with sex and romance. One is a simple lust spell. It creates an overwhelming need to rut in the subject, and an experienced sorcerer can direct the being’s attention to himself or to someone else, as needed. It’s mostly used as a form of distraction, or if the sorcerer is simply attracted to the subject, but doesn’t wish to waste time wooing him or her.

“The other is a love spell. It doesn’t work the way you might think. It can’t create a feeling of love where none exists; it can only drive away whatever obstacles exist in the subject’s mind which are preventing him or her from accepting their true feelings. It is extremely powerful and long-lasting, and requires much time and great attention to detail in order to formulate it correctly. It would not be entered into lightly.” Loki’s gaze had been trained on the wall behind Tony’s head, but now he turned a laser-like look at Tony, and a thunderous expression came over him.

“And, if you think I find it necessary to stoop to such tactics to receive an invitation into your bed, you are even more of an egomaniacal, narcissistic, delusional nitwit than I originally thought. Fuck you, Tony Stark.” He stood up, all serpentine grace and fluid moves, and then he was dressed in his leathers, his eyes sparking fire. “I don’t give a tinker’s damn if you like me, or care about me, or even if you continue to want to bed me. I’ve been thrown out of better places than this many times, and I will be again—”

Tony was beginning to regret his inelegant approach to his query and he hastily stood up and reached for Loki’s shoulders. “Now, hold on there, hot shot, calm down. I didn’t mean to—”

Loki stepped back, evading Tony’s touch. “To answer your inane question, no, you are under no sort of enchantment and believe it or not, whatever feelings you might harbor toward me are of your own device. Good luck with that, and to hell with your puling ways. Find someone else to warm your bed and suck your cock. I’m _done_.” 

In a flash of lightning, Loki was gone, leaving nothing but a sputter of electricity in the air where he had stood.


	5. Thor, God of Helpfulness, Almost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki and Tony each unhappily stew over their last meeting, and Thor tries to help.

Loki departed from Stark Tower with as much anger roiling in his belly as he’d felt in many an age. So much of that dangerous emotion had been tamed within him through the therapeutic methods of his healer on Asgard, and more was kept in check with the draught he took once a year on the eve of the first winter moon. But, there was always a trace of it simmering within his soul, and damn it to Hel, Tony Stark had a way of bringing it out of him like no other.

 

He teleported himself to what was known as the Midgardian state of New Mexico, appearing on an isolated butte a little over a mile from the home of Jane Foster. He sat cross-legged on the rocky ground there, the lonely dark making him feel small, yet oddly safe. He stared up into the star-peppered sky and forced himself to take some peace from it so he could examine what, exactly, it was that had upset him so. 

 

Tony Stark was an _ass._ He knew that about him; he knew he could expect some sort of absurd nonsense to spew forth from his lips at any given time, so why was he so surprised? Why was he so disturbed to find that he was still no closer to winning the foolish human’s trust than he’d been when he first came to apologize to him? 

 

Perhaps doing so was simply an impossibility, given Stark’s past experiences. Perhaps the trust had been driven out of him in a cave in Afghanistan...

 

Loki fumed about that for a bit, but as he calmed, another painful thought occurred to him.

 

 _Perhaps he was simply such a poor excuse for an Æsir that he would never again be worthy of_ anyone’s _trust, if indeed he ever had been to begin with._

 

Of course, trusting others was a luxury he himself had long ago learned to do without.

 

Loki had had many lovers in his life, both male and female. The first, one of his mother’s handmaidens, had taught him the joys of physical pleasure, as well as an equally valuable lesson—the folly of ever trusting anyone offering him friendship, kindness, or affection under the guise of caring for him.

 

The girl had been beautiful and sweet, and young Loki had been quite taken with her, quite flattered and pleased that she chose him over his powerfully-built, golden-haired brother, who had women of all ages and social classes hanging on him at every turn. Loki had dared to hope that something strong and lasting would come of their dalliance, for even though the Æsir were not permitted to marry someone of common stock, it was perfectly acceptable for them to have a lifetime union with one, in addition to or instead of a spouse.

 

But, Loki eventually discovered that the girl wanted not him, but to influence his use of magic in order to take revenge on a previous lover. The realization had infuriated him, causing him to demand that his mother dismiss her immediately, but Frigga had wisely taken him aside and gently questioned him until she learned the truth. She explained to him that the girl had hurt him deeply, and it was that pain that was fueling his anger. But Loki hadn’t cared about reasons at the time, and he’d vowed never to allow another to take away his pride and self-respect in that way.

 

After that, he’d learned to cast a skeptical eye on anyone ill-advised enough to woo him. He’d learned to use his power, his pretty face, and his silver tongue to get whatever he wanted, and to then leave his lovers behind long before they had the chance to do the same to him. He gave only what pleased him, or was absolutely necessary to win whatever prize it was he desired.

 

In time, he’d hardened his heart again and again until it was crusted over with solid rock, until no one could gain entrance.

 

And, now, stupidly, he’d just begun to let Tony Stark chip away at it, only to find once again that his very nature, the essence of who he was, was nothing more than a trifling diversion to the man, a carnival amusement tied to suspicion and distrust.

 

By the _gods,_ he’d never again step foot in Tony Stark’s presence. Not by his own volition, anyway. The man could go fuck himself with a rusty railroad spike for all he cared, no matter how kind he’d been to him, no matter how intelligent and funny he might be to converse with, no matter how much Loki had liked being held in his strong arms, liked being touched and caressed by his gentle hands...

 

He let out a shaky breath, rubbed his eyes and brushed his hair away from his face, and wondered if Thor was in the odd little house on wheels that Jane Foster inexplicably chose to inhabit. For all their differences, Thor was the one person in the world he could still count on to receive him with some degree of pleasure and the one person who would allow him to keep company with him for an entire evening, assuming his lady friend was not present. He looked toward the yellow lights of the little abode and decided to take a chance.

 

He walked there; moving his limbs felt good, and it gave him more time to think, to let his tempest of emotions settle into a sort of numbness in the pit of his stomach. As he approached, he saw his brother sitting outside, tending a small fire in a makeshift pit. Thor looked up and saw him; a huge grin crossed his handsome face.

 

“Loki! My brother, how good it is to see you! Come, join me here by the fire and tell me what you’ve been up to as of late.” He rose and wrapped Loki in a strangling embrace, which Loki didn’t really mind, but he pulled away as quickly as possible in pretend annoyance and gave his brother a curt nod.

 

“Thor.” Loki took a seat in a flimsy looking “lawn chair,” as they were apparently called, stretching his legs out before him. “Where is your woman?”

 

“She’s doing something known as ‘field work’ tonight and will not return until the morrow. So, you are free to ‘hang out’ with me for the entire night!” Thor’s happy booming voice filled the night air and Loki rolled his eyes.

 

“Thank you for the kind invitation, but that will not be necessary. I simply wished to pass a few moments in the relative safety of this forsaken land to collect my thoughts.”

 

Thor nodded understandingly and clamped a large hand on his brother’s shoulder before asking, “Would you care for food or drink? I have beer... and leftover chicken wings from my dinner. They are quite spicy, you might enjoy them.”

 

“No, I want for nothing—just silence,” Loki answered pointedly.

 

“You seem troubled,” Thor observed, disregarding Loki’s subtle request. “What’s wrong?”

 

Loki was tempted to unload the pain in his heart onto his brother, but in spite of Stark’s idiocy, he didn’t want to reveal the nature of their relationship just yet, so he simply said, “I’m very tired, brother, that’s all.”

 

Thor sat back in his chair and joined Loki in staring up at the sky. “Beautiful, isn’t it? So different from the view in Asgard...” Thor instantly felt bad. He knew Loki missed his home and it always made him sad to speak of it. But Loki just nodded.

 

“Yes. The universe is so vast... It’s strange not to have a place in it.” His words held no tinge of bitterness, just a bit of wistfulness.

 

“How do you spend your time, Loki?” Thor asked gently. It was a question he had wondered many times, but had always feared to ask.

 

“I travel among—and beyond—the nine realms. I find a form pleasing to the indigenous populace wherever I go and assume it for a time; I learn their culture and customs, and find food and drink as I may. It is a blessing to have been allowed to keep my magic—I can conjure local currency as necessary. When I tire of the deception, I move on.”

 

Thor realized he was staring at his brother with pity; for all of Loki’s tendency toward mayhem and mischief, he had always had a focus, a purpose in life. Now, he sounded so adrift, so lonely, that it hurt Thor in his soul. “Do you not befriend the beings you discover?”

 

Loki laughed. “That is rarely an option. Aside from Asgard and Midgard, the other realms are typically very insular and most are thinly populated; a stranger attempting to curry favor would be looked upon with utmost suspicion. No, the chance of getting myself into trouble is too great—and you know what Odin will do if I create a disturbance anywhere in the universe.”

 

Thor turned away and went back to his sky-gazing, letting Loki’s words waft around in his brain. Thor wasn’t stupid; he was a master of battle strategy, quick to size up an opponent’s strengths and weaknesses, but he hadn’t had much practice in the kinder art of offering guidance to those struggling with psychological and emotional turmoil. Still, he longed to help his brother.

 

The two sat silently for a long time. Loki was just about to rise to his feet, happy to have had a brief respite, but just then Thor said, “Loki? I may have a proposition for you...” and after a moment’s hesitation, Loki stayed to listen to him.

 

 

*****

 

Okay, so, the last time it happened? Tony was pretty sure that that was the last time it would _ever_ happen, and he was almost right.

 

Loki’s parting words— _I’m done_ —were about as final as anything Tony had ever heard in his life, and while he spent quite a bit of time talking to the air again, he didn’t get one single vibe that the hot dude from Asgard was listening to anything that he said.

 

Or that he even wanted to.

 

In fact, after chewing on the problem for over a week, Tony was feeling less and less hopeful that Loki would ever give him a chance to plead his case, and he spent his time alternating between gut-wrenching despair and righteous anger over that all-too-likely possibility. 

 

On the one hand, Tony really was nuts about the guy. He liked everything about him—his looks, his brain (well, apart from that unfortunate insanity thing of course, but he really did seem to be doing just fine in the not-wanting-to-subjugate-the-human-species-anymore department, so Tony was willing to call that a win), his wit, and that weird _something_ underneath it all, that kind of lost-in-the-funhouse vulnerability that got Tony feeling all protective and caring and worried and stuff.

 

The bizarre fact that Loki could turn himself into an incredibly hot babe at will was deliciously kinky as well, but Tony knew that was just icing on an already mind-blowingly wonderful cake, and that he was one damn lucky bastard to have him in his life at all.

 

But, on the other hand, what the hell was the matter with the temperamental little shit, anyway? Was it really that hard to cut him some slack, just because he’d asked one unbelievably stupid question? _I mean, isn’t that the key to a good relationship—slack-cutting? ...Uh-oh._ _Relationship? Did I really just think “Loki” and “relationship” in the same thought bubble?_ he wondered.

 

The idea was really scary, but after stewing over it for a couple more days, he decided he kind of liked it. 

 

Which would have been just peachy, if only he could ever have the opportunity to be in the same room with the demented little bastard in order to pursue such a thing. And, it was beginning to look as if he wouldn’t. Ever.

 

No, he knew he’d have to do some world-class groveling to get Loki to forgive him, and the only way to do that was to get him to _talk_ to him, and that was... 

 

Not happening. 

 

So, somehow he’d have to get a message to Thor and talk him into mediating for him, all without actually explaining to the God of Thunder that his new bestest buddy, Tony “Man of Iron” Stark, had been repeatedly playing hide-the-salami with his mentally ill little brother.

 

And, eventually, he came up with some thoughts on how to go about doing that. He even figured out just what to say, too.

 

But, the entire problem was rendered moot one evening when he blithely walked into his living room after a long day of meetings, ready to lose himself in some football and vodka, only to find Thor standing there, bearing a beaten and bloody Loki in his arms.

 

******

 

 

 

 


	6. Wake Up and Stop Bleeding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blood and home-surgery, magic-style.

“What... the... _fuck...?”_ Tony gasped. He was beyond shocked; Loki looked dead. His already pale features were almost translucent wherever there wasn’t a scrape or  bruise, and his hair was matted with blood behind one ear. He lay limply in Thor’s arms as if unconscious.

 

Thor, Tony noticed once he was able to pull his eyes off of Loki, wasn’t exactly in pristine condition either. He had dirt all over him and a deep nick on his chin, and his right arm had been slashed open across his bicep. But, all his concern was for his little brother. The expression on his face was heartbreaking—he cast a pleading look at Tony.

 

“Man of Iron, I beg you—may I claim safe harbor for my brother here in your abode? He is most grievously wounded and we have nowhere else to go.”

 

“Yeah, yeah, of course! Put him on the couch. I’m calling a doctor—”

 

Thor carefully lay Loki down, but shot Tony a sharp look. “No! Your Midgardian healers can do nothing for him. I must go to Asgard immediately and seek assistance. He will be all right for the nonce—his magic is keeping him alive.” With that bit of information, Thor took off in a shockwave of thunder.

 

Tony stared at the phone in his hand for a moment, then decided that Point Break was probably right, and anyway, the only doctor he could call, given S.H.E.I.L.D.’s attitude toward Loki, was Banner and God only knew where the hell he was and how he would react. Tony strode to Loki and knelt beside him. “Hey, tough guy. What the fuck happened to you?”

 

Loki’s eyes fluttered open and one side of his mouth tugged upward. “Hello... human,” he managed to whisper. Tony had never heard him sound so broken.

 

“Jesus, Loki. Where are you hurt?” 

 

Loki had one hand on his side; he looked down, indicating the location of the wound. 

 

“Let me see.” All Tony could make out was that Loki’s traveling clothes were shredded and soaked in blood around his hand.

 

Loki shook his head as well as he could. “N-no...  Keeping my lifeblood from seeping out... can’t move my hand...” He swallowed thickly and shut his eyes again. 

 

Tony felt emotion well up in his throat. Loki couldn’t die in front of him, he wouldn’t allow it. He gently caressed Loki’s bruised cheek. “There’s got to be something I can do to help you,” he said softly.

 

Loki smiled without opening his eyes. “Stay...” was all he said. Suddenly, his features went slack and his blood-covered hand dropped to his side. As he’d predicted, more blood came out, thick, wet, dark red. 

 

Tony thought he would lose it, but he ran to the bathroom and came back with a bath towel. He pressed it onto Loki’s side, not even noticing that tears were welling up in his eyes. “Stay with me, man. You gotta do it, you can’t leave me again. Jesus, Loki, I just got you back! Stay with me, stay with me...” He murmured more such commands, hoping that by the sheer force of his will that Loki would live.

 

It seemed like forever, but Thor soon returned. He had a small glass vial in his hand. He pulled the cork from it, and without a word, he pushed Tony aside and stuck one arm under Loki’s shoulders, lifting him into a half-sitting position which would have hurt like hell if he’d been conscious, and managed to pour the liquid down Loki’s throat.

 

“What is that stuff?” Tony asked.

 

“A potion to keep Loki’s magic strong. Although...” Thor stared down at his brother’s still features. “...it may be too late.”

 

“No, it’s not.” Tony crowded in beside Thor and took Loki’s hand, pressing it tightly between his own. “Now, you listen to me, you smart-ass little twerp. You’re going to be fine. This medicine shit is doing its work, and you’re getting stronger every second, understand? So, wake up and stop bleeding, damn it!”

 

Whether the potion worked so quickly or whether Tony’s words actually got through to Loki’s mind was hard to say, but his eyes opened under heavy lids, staring unfocused for a moment. Then he blinked and seemed to come to. He glanced down at his wound, which was still seeping blood onto Tony’s couch. He lay his hand on it and Tony thought he saw a little gold spark flash under the god’s fingers. The blood stopped.

 

Loki had been breathing shallowly, but he took in a long, deep breath and spoke. “Thor, get out of here. I must mend my injuries and I don’t want you standing around wringing your hands. Go heat some water and find some cloths, that’s not beyond your mental capacities, is it?”

 

“I am not leaving your side, brother, I—”

 

“Thor.” Tony looked into the thunder god’s eyes. “He doesn’t want you to see him like this. Go, get the stuff he wants. I’ll stay with him.”

 

Thor looked bewildered, but then he nodded and rose to go find Tony’s kitchen. Tony looked back at Loki.

 

“Thank you,” Loki whispered, clearly exhausted from his little speech.

 

“I’m going to help you—just tell me what you need.”

 

“Help me... sit up a bit. I need to remove my coat.” Clearly in agony, Loki tried to raise himself, and Tony quickly got beside him and began working the heavy leather and metal garment away from Loki’s shoulders. Once it was off, Tony could see that the silken shirt underneath had been ripped apart, finally allowing him to see Loki’s wound. Tony blanched; Loki’s skin was torn wide open just below his ribs, skin hanging in bloody shreds around an opening that revealed Loki’s intestines, which were also torn and bleeding. A human would have been long dead from such an injury, and Loki didn’t appear to be far from it.

 

“What can I do?” Tony asked in a whisper.

 

“Just stay here. Talk to me.” Loki seemed to be in deep concentration, gathering what little strength he had.

 

“What are you going to do?”

 

“I must... mend each tear in my entrails.”

 

Tony’s eyes went wide. “Wait a minute—you’re going to...?”

 

Loki barely nodded, and then he stuck his own hand inside his wound, fingering the wrecked organs. He made a choked sound, and Tony couldn’t even begin to imagine how much pain the god might be in. Without thinking, he helped Loki find a better position so that he could maneuver inside his body cavity and he watched Loki’s blood-slicked fingers trace each little seeping tear; every time he found one, he’d pinch it closed and Tony could see the edges of flesh knit together, emitting tiny sparks of gold.

 

He glanced at Loki’s face every now and again. His skin was drained of all color and the god’s forehead was glistening with sweat. Tony reached for a box of tissues and swabbed the moisture away so it wouldn’t run into Loki’s eyes. 

 

Eons seemed to pass by, but Loki kept at it. Finally, he looked at Tony. “There’s one more...” he said in a gravelly voice. “Inside me. The pain... I can’t focus. Can you find it? Put my finger on it.”

 

Tony stared at him in horror. “You want me to... look in there? At your _guts?”_

 

Loki managed a thoroughly disgusted sneer. “No, I was hoping you’d check my scalp for head lice. Yes, Tony, find the last tear or I won’t be able to stop the internal bleeding.” He shifted, offering Tony better access to his innards.

 

Tony had seen battle wounds before, but he’d never been in a position to do anything about them, and to be honest, he was already a little queasy. But, what Loki was asking of him was nothing compared to what the god had already been through, so he decided he’d better just man up and see where the last tear was inside Loki’s entrails. 

 

It was sickening work, and he couldn’t see anything without... _touching_ the wounded organ, but finally he saw a raw tear seeping blood. “Here,” he croaked. He took Loki’s index finger and placed it on the wound. 

 

Loki looked close to losing consciousness, but he did the gold-sparking thing, and the last little tear was closed and no more blood appeared. Loki took a moment to breathe, and then said, “Help me close the exterior wound.”

 

That had to be a walk in the park compared to what Tony had just experienced, and  it turned out not to be too bad. He helped Loki pull the torn edges of skin toward each other so they met, and then he held them in place while Loki pressed his fingers to them, letting them ravel together before Tony’s eyes. Once he finished, the wound was an angry raw, raised pattern on the pale flesh of Loki’s torso, but the blood no longer came, and the god appeared to be stable. 

 

Tony helped him lie back, watching him draw in ragged breaths in the after-shock of his ordeal.

 

“Thank you,” Loki whispered. “I must rest now.” 

 

“Sure, kiddo. Go to sleep. You did great.”

 

Loki was already out. 

 

“Thor!” Tony called.

 

The worried blond god came striding in. “Yes? Is he...?”

 

“He’s all right. Get those wet cloths and a big bowl of water and let’s clean him up, okay? Oh, but first we need to move him. It’s no good having him out here where Pepper or somebody might barge in.”

 

“Where shall we take him?”

 

“My bedroom.”

 

Thor had a confused look. “Do you not have many bedchambers in your palace?”

 

Tony started to say, “Yeah, but I don’t want him waking up in an unfamiliar place,” but he caught himself, saying lamely instead, “Yeah, but that one’s the closest, and I have lots of... pillows. He’s going to need pillows. Look, just give me a hand, will you? Grab his coat.”

 

Thor went to pick Loki up, but Tony had already gathered him into his arms and lifted him. He met Thor’s eyes. “Your arm. You don’t need to be carrying him.” And, really, without his coat on, Loki hardly weighed anything. 

 

Tony led Thor to his bedroom and the blond man placed the bowl of water and cloths on the nightstand before pulling back the covers. Tony lay Loki on the bed and then they worked together to pull off his muddy, blood-stained boots and to get him out of his ruined shirt and bloody trousers. Once they got them off, they stared down at the injured man, shocked at how many bruises and contusions littered the rest of his body. Even his underwear was drenched with blood. Tony took a wet cloth from Thor and began carefully cleaning his lover, first the wound, then his hands, then his face, dipping the cloth in the bowl each time, making the water turn a bright crimson color.

 

“Look in that top drawer and find me a t-shirt and some underwear, will you? He wouldn’t like to wake up in dirty clothes.” 

 

Thor did as requested and then helped Tony pull off Loki’s blood-soaked underthings, leaving him nude. Tony grabbed a fresh cloth to clean him as Thor looked on with an uncertain expression. “You’re very kind to care for my brother in this way, especially considering the harm he brought to your realm.”

 

“Yeah, well, we’ve kind of been working through all that.”

 

Thor raised an eyebrow. “You have? He never mentioned it.”

 

Tony shrugged. “It hasn’t exactly been smooth sailing.” Eager to change the subject, Tony gestured for the clean clothes. “Give me a hand getting him dressed.”

 

Once they had Loki relatively clean, dressed, and settled under the covers, Tony led Thor to a sitting area under a window, far enough away that their discussion couldn’t be overheard by the unconscious god and possibly disturb his rest. Tony gave Thor a dark look. “What the hell happened to him, man?”

 

Thor’s face crumpled and he pressed his fingers into his eyes. “It’s all my fault. All my fault my little brother nearly died...”

 

“Okay, okay, that doesn’t matter now. Tell me what happened.”

 

Thor pulled himself together and took a deep breath. “I’ve been so worried about him. He’s been so... lost. I know he craves purpose, something that will challenge his considerable skills and talents. So, when a recent situation came up, I thought of him.”

 

“What was it?”

 

“There is a small realm beyond Asgard, a province of ours which my father has ruled for many ages. But, some time ago he decided to put its governance in the hands of one of his lieutenants. There were rumors of mismanagement and later, corruption. Lately, there has been ‘chatter,’ I believe you call it, to the effect that conditions have so deteriorated that an uprising was imminent. Father ordered me to pay the realm a visit, to try to determine what exactly was going on and to help him decide a proper course of action.

 

“Loki and I used to visit there in our youth, and I knew I would be recognized. I knew I would not be given an accurate portrayal of conditions there, either due to fear or favor. So, after hearing Loki’s habit of traveling among the realms, taking on an inconspicuous form and living among the natives, I knew he could help me. I asked him to take on the task of investigating for me.”

 

“Okay, so he was spying for you.”

 

“He was my eyes and ears for three of your Midgardian weeks. At the end of that time, he contacted me to have me join him. He wanted me to see with my own eyes the deplorable conditions he’d discovered. When I arrived, I found that Loki had returned to his normal form. What neither of us knew was that our previous conversation had been overheard by an insurgent—and a party was lying in wait. Poor Loki got there first, and was immediately attacked.

 

“The inhabitants are not so different in appearance from humans and are normally a placid people, but they are vicious fighters when provoked and they have a beast of battle... it is something like the Midgardian rhinoceros, I believe, but somewhat lighter and more agile. One came out of nowhere and I failed to notice it charging me from behind. Loki pushed me out of the way... There is a large curved spike on its snout, and it was that which impaled Loki. He was weary from battle, and could not move from its path quickly enough.

 

“He fought most valiantly, Tony, using only a wooden staff as his weapon. Our father would have been enormously proud of him. He... he saved my life.”

 

They both fell silent, Thor clearly still seeing the horror of the battle running through his mind’s eye, Tony trying to absorb all the information Thor had just given him. Then he asked, “Wait a minute—why didn’t Loki, you know, smite the heck out of all those fuckers with his magic?”

 

Thor shook his head sorrowfully. “Part of the terms of Loki’s freedom is that he is not to use his magic against any being in any realm for any reason. If he does, he will instantly be returned to the dungeons of Asgard, with no hope of release.”

 

A harsh frown darkened Tony’s face. “Not even for self-defense?” he demanded.

 

“No. Not even for that.”

 

Tony felt like tearing something apart. “What kind of sadistic asshole is this Odin bastard anyway?”

 

“I cannot bring to question my father’s decisions!” Thor cried out painfully. “He knows what is best, what is right.”

 

“So, his youngest boy is doomed to wander around the cosmos unable to defend himself? Kind of sounds like he wants to see him dead, one way or another.”

 

“He believed that, knowing magic was not permitted, Loki would choose his adventures carefully, thereby avoiding getting himself mixed up in conflicts among other worlds.”

 

“Yeah, well, then he made the mistake of listening to you, huh?”

 

A sick look came over Thor, and he nodded. “Yes. But, I swear to you, Tony Stark—I never imagined that there was such an organized and retaliatory element on what was once a peaceful planet. I would never have brought Loki into it if I’d known.” He stood up and went to Loki’s side, Tony trailing behind him. 

 

Thor gently brushed a lock of hair away from Loki’s forehead. “You were always so brave, my brother. From the time we were small, no matter how grave your disadvantage, you’d throw yourself into battle by my side with no thought of the consequences.” He raised his eyes to Tony’s. “Once he learned to use magic, he became as formidable an opponent as I. But, he was chastised and ridiculed for it, made to feel such tactics brought dishonor to our family. 

 

“So, he learned to fight without it, and no one is as swift and clever in battle as Loki. But, he simply lacks the strength and endurance to go for long without sorcery. I always feared something like this would happen... I just never dreamed I would be the one to bring it upon him.” Thor sighed, and then suddenly lifted his head as though he was listening to a voice in his head. He turned to Tony and said, “I must go, Man of Iron. May my brother stay here for the night? He should be better in the morning. I will return as soon as possible to check on him, but it may be some time before I can.”

 

“Yeah, it’s fine, but do you have any more of that stuff you gave him? He might need another dose, huh?”

 

Thor reached into his vest. “I do. But, this is not easy to come by, and he really shouldn’t need it. I would prefer you put it away and save it until such time as it is drastically called for—another day such  as this one. Which I hope to the Norns will never come again.” With that, Thor left Tony’s room and a clap of thunder signaled his departure.

 

Tony turned back to Loki. Some of the ugliest abrasions on his face were fading. Tony carefully lifted his shirt to examine the hideous wound in his side. It was still red and moist looking, but seemed to be healing. Tony said Loki’s name softly, but got no response. He covered him up again and went to get ready for bed.

 

He pulled over one of the easy chairs and an ottoman to the bedside; he would have preferred to lie down next to Loki, but he was afraid his presence would disturb the god’s rest, and anyway, after the way Loki had left his bed the last time, he wasn’t sure he would appreciate Tony taking the liberty of sleeping next to him without being asked if he minded.

 

Tony settled for clasping his hand in his. He propped up his feet, stretched out, and was soon as unconscious as his injured guest.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	7. Weak Magic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fluffy-yet-angsty chapter. Loki wakes up feeling terrible after his ordeal and Tony helps him take a shower.

Thor and Loki stood in a glorious sunny field, so different from Asgard’s dark forests. There were so many flowers, vivid and aromatic, like nothing they’d ever seen before. Little insects flew around them, creating a comforting buzzy noise. Small animals scampered about, some curious and unafraid enough to come near and sniff the boys’ hands. Even the birds were different there—tiny and colorful, making sweet music, so unlike the large predatory raptors they knew at home.

 

“It’s all right, lads,” their father had said. “You may explore all you like, it’s quite safe here on the governor’s grounds. Just don’t go beyond the wall. I’ll be right inside—speak to a guard if you need anything.” Odin had then given each of his young sons a squeeze on the shoulder before turning and heading into the huge old palace that was now the political hub of the realm of Trondheim.

 

Loki was happy to walk quietly, eager to observe more of the beauty of this different world, but Thor quickly became bored. “See that tree, Loki? I bet I can reach it before you. Let’s race.”

 

There weren’t many physical challenges at which Loki could hope to beat Thor, but when it came to running, Thor tended to be a bit of a plodder, while Loki was fast and nimble, giving him an advantage in spite of his much shorter legs. After considering the distance, he thought he might have a chance. He nodded. “All right. You count.”

 

Thor grinned, pleased that Loki had accepted his challenge. “All right—ready yourself. One... two... three, go!” The boys took off and Loki made it to the tree ahead of Thor by a hair. 

 

“I won!” he gasped, laughing in surprised delight.

“That you did, brother. But, I bet you can’t _climb_ this tree.”

 

Loki’s joy quickly dissipated as he looked up at the gnarled old tree. The lowest branch was several inches out of reach for him, while Thor could grab it easily. Loki shook his head. “I won’t bet you, brother. There’s no way I can get up there, I’m too small.” He sighed, and went to sit down on the grass to watch his brother exhibit his superior strength and agility. “You go ahead.”

 

If this had been back in Asgard, and if Thor’s friends had been with them, the bigger kids would have already clambered up into the waiting branches, leaving Loki alone on the ground, probably mocking him for being smaller and too afraid to even attempt to climb. 

 

But now, Thor glanced from the enticing arms of the tree to his little brother. “You can do it, Loki. I’ll help you.”

 

“Don’t be an idiot. I’ll just fall, and then we’ll both be in trouble.”

 

“You won’t fall—I won’t let you. Come on, try.”

 

Loki gave Thor a dubious look, but stood up and approached the tree. He stared up at the lowest branch and, knowing it was useless, strained upward to reach it. His fingertips didn’t even graze it. He shook his head again, more adamantly this time.

 

“You see? I can’t.”

 

“Yes, you can. Here...” Thor came over and grasped Loki around his legs. He lifted him easily, and Loki was able to grab hold, pull himself up, and throw one leg over the branch. From there, he had no trouble negotiating his way to the crook of the tree and wedging himself in. He was panting with the exertion, but was smiling excitedly.

 

“I did it, Thor! Oh, it’s wonderful up here. You can see everything!”

 

Thor laughed, pleased. He wouldn’t admit it, but he liked seeing Loki happy. He quickly climbed up and joined him. He followed Loki’s gaze and gave a low whistle. “It’s brilliant! The whole realm stretches before us. I wonder what lies beyond that wall.”

 

Loki shot him a disapproving look. “It makes no difference. Father told us to stay within it. You would not be so stupid as to disobey him... Would you?” Loki asked, a touch of horror in his voice as he realized that that was _exactly_ what Thor intended to do.

 

“No, of course not. But, it can’t hurt to take a closer look, can it? Come on, let’s go.” Thor let himself down by holding onto the low branch and then dropping softly to the ground. Loki bit his lip worriedly, but he followed, landing a bit harder, having farther to fall. He lost his balance and ended up on his bottom, unhurt but feeling decidedly foolish. He looked up to see Thor running toward the fence, already many yards away from him.

 

“Wait for me, Thor!” Loki shouted, scrambling to his feet. “Wait! I’m coming!”

 

Loki took off, sprinting after his brother. He paused in disgust as he saw Thor leap over the thick stone fence. He grit his teeth, thinking, “I know I’m going to regret this,” but he raced as fast as he could to join his errant sibling. He wasn’t big enough to simply vault himself over, but he was able to scramble up and drop down onto the other side.

 

“Thor?” he called. He looked to his right and then to his left, but couldn’t see Thor anywhere. He took a few tentative steps forward, and spotted his brother lying on the ground. A thin man with long black hair was standing above him, a knife glinting in his hand.

 

_“Thor!”_ Loki shouted. “You must get up! _Hurry!”_

 

The man raised the blade above his head, clearly intent on plunging it into the fallen blond-haired boy.

 

_“No!_ _Stop!_ Don’t hurt him!” Loki took off running, Not pausing to consider his size, Loki launched himself at the man, attacking him with his fists and all the strength and fury his small frame contained. He was yelling as he landed each vicious blow, but the man only laughed and shook him off, dropping him flat on his back beside Thor. He then brought the knife down in a graceful arc, piercing the flesh of young Thor’s belly.

 

Terrified, Loki looked up. The man was standing over him, laughing as the blade dripped blood onto the ground, and Loki saw he was himself as a grown man. The boy shook his head and whispered _“No...”_ He looked over at Thor, who was lying still, his eyes closed, blood pouring from his belly.

 

“Thor!” the boy Loki screamed, tears streaming from his eyes. He screamed his brother’s name over and over again until he felt a hand on his arm.

 

Loki woke up.

* * *

 

“Thor,” Loki gasped weakly. It came out barely a whisper, although he felt as if he were still screaming.

 

“Easy there, tough guy. Big brother’s run off for a while, you’ll have to make do with little ol’ me.” Tony was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at Loki with concern. “Bad dream, huh?”

 

“What?” Loki’s vision was blurred and he blinked until things came into focus. A dull ache in his side turned into a sharp stab of pain as he tried to sit up. He grimaced, but managed to say, “Oh. It’s you, Stark. How the hell did I end up in your bed again?”

 

Tony’s worried frown disappeared. He’d heard Loki cry out, and he’d had trouble getting him to let go of his dream world. Now, he smiled in relief to hear one of Loki’s typically snarky remarks. He reached out a hand and gently smudged away a tear that had run down Loki’s cheek.

 

“Oh, you know, a little wine, a little dance, a little song. Naturally, you found me irresistible. That and the gaping hole in your gut, which I had the pleasure of exploring. You really are fun on a date, you know that? No wonder you’re so popular.” Tony’s eyes were twinkling, and Loki tried to follow the meaning behind his teasing words and to make sense of his jumbled memories. Things began to fall into place, although a lot of it was still fuzzy.

 

“That was... _not_ a date.” Loki again struggled to sit up, but it hurt too much. He lay back, panting. “However, if you want to show me a good time, help me go to the bathroom. My bladder’s about to burst.”

 

The worried look crossed Tony’s face again. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea, gorgeous. All those magical stitches inside you—a couple of ‘em might come loose, then Dr. Tony’d have to wash up and go in again, and I gotta tell you, internal medicine is not my specialty, not _that_ kind of internal, anyway.”

 

“I’ll be fine. Just help me get up.” 

 

Tony reluctantly came around the other side of the bed and leaned down. Loki weakly wrapped his arms around Tony’s neck and Tony grasped him around the waist and they managed to get Loki to his feet. Tony heard him forcibly repress a scream of pain. “Are you okay?” he hissed.

 

“Yes. Just... give me a minute.” Loki hung onto Tony’s neck with one hand and pressed the other to his side. Tony could feel the magic vibrating under Loki’s skin. “There. I’m fine.” He let go and started to walk, but would have fallen if Tony hadn’t grabbed him.

 

“Whoa. I think you’re kind of _not_ fine, as in, not fine at _all._ Get back in bed.”

 

_“No._ I just need to get my feet under me, I’ve been lying down too long.” He again took a few steps, holding onto Tony’s shoulder. They slowly made it to the bathroom, Loki’s face drained of what little color he’d had upon awaking.

 

Tony maneuvered him to the toilet and Loki shakily stood facing it on his own. He looked down at himself for the first time since waking. “What the bloody hell am I wearing?”

 

“Those are mine. Fit pretty good, though, huh?”

 

Loki turned to look at him in distaste. “I’m wearing _your_ underwear?”

 

“What? They’re clean!”

 

“Ugh.”

 

“You know, you’ve had several parts of my body inserted into several parts of _your_ body, and you’re grossed out by my clean underwear?”

 

“It’s... fine. Now, get out. I prefer to piss in peace.”

 

“Okay. I’ll be right out here.” Tony stepped out of the bathroom and heard the heavy urine stream fill the toilet bowl, followed by a flush. Then everything was quiet for a moment, until a plaintive “Tony?” came from within the room.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I want to take a shower.”

 

“Okay. Go ahead.”

 

“I can’t, uh... I can’t quite manage the shirt.” 

 

Tony came back in and found Loki standing with the boxer shorts pooled around his feet and the t-shirt halfway up his torso, but the god clearly was in too much pain to wriggle the rest of the way out of it. It was a bit comical, but Tony could see the pain and embarrassment on Loki’s face, and he just smiled kindly.

 

“Here. Let me give you a hand.” He pulled the shirt over Loki’s head.

 

“Thank you.”

 

“I’ll get the water started.” Tony turned on the water, adjusting the temperature. It was a luxurious walk-in shower stall, with plenty of room for two. Tony helped Loki get in, and then he undressed himself, and joined Loki under the spray of hot water.

 

“What are you doing?” Loki asked tiredly.

 

“Making sure you don’t slip and dislodge vital organs. And, I _totally_ don’t have a boner, although I can’t guarantee for how long, seeing as how we’re both naked and wet, which are two of my top three favorite ways to be. Want to guess what the  third one is?” Tony asked, a leer in his voice.

 

“Hm. This may be difficult for you to believe, but I’m not really in the mood for any of your erotic shenanigans at the moment.”

 

“I know that.” Tony gently turned him to face him, an actual serious expression now on his face. “I’m kidding. I’m just here because it seems to me that if you can’t get a shirt over your head, you won’t be able to wash your hair either. And, this...” Tony gathered the thick mass of hair matted with blood and dirt behind his ear. “...this needs washing. Okay?”

 

Loki just nodded and turned back to the spray. Tony pulled the shower head out of its cradle and wet Loki’s hair thoroughly. He then replaced it and poured shampoo into his palm and began massaging it into Loki’s scalp, then carefully worked through the matted part, discovering a partly-healed gash underneath. Loki flinched when the water hit it, running a murky red down over his shoulders, but Tony noted that the other bruises and abrasions from yesterday were all but faded away.

 

The wound on his belly was still red and slightly swollen, but it no longer looked as if the skin was about to pull apart. Tony helped Loki wash himself, his neck, under his arms, over his stomach...

 

“That will do, Stark. I can manage from here.”

 

“Good plan, admiral. Just holler if you need help getting out.” Tony saluted cheerfully.

 

Loki didn’t answer, and Tony stepped out onto the fluffy bathmat and toweled off. He found a fresh towel and left it on the rack for Loki, and then got dressed and went to wait in the bedroom. He did a not-too-bad job of changing the sheets and was just taking the wad of blood-stained, dirty bedclothes to the hamper when Loki emerged, wearing a towel around his waist, his hair dripping wet. He supported himself with one hand on the door jamb and asked, “Do you have any more clothes I might borrow?”

 

“Are you kidding? I’ve got a walk-in closet the size of JC Penney. But, don’t you usually just, you know, conjure up a stylish outfit in your size? You’re a teeny bit taller than me.”

 

Loki gave him a look that was almost a smirk. “‘A _teeny_ bit?’ Right.” He hobbled toward the bedside chair and sank down into it, clutching the towel around him. “As for the conjuring—I tried. My magic seems to be a bit useless just now.” 

 

“What do you mean?” Tony sat on the ottoman facing him.

 

Loki stared past Tony, pursing his lips. “I’m not sure what’s happening... It’s very weak. I’ve never had that happen before. Of course, I’ve never been gored by a Tronderian nesehorn before.”

 

“You mean, the outer-space rhino thingie?”

 

“Uh, yes, I believe so.”

 

“He did quite a job on you.”

 

Loki shrugged. “My own fault.”

 

“How so?”

 

“I’d never seen such a creature. It was coming straight for Thor. I was a little... dazed, I suppose, from fighting the insurgents. I was standing there, thinking how funny it would be if the damn thing butted Thor right in the ass and sent him flying through the air. Then I saw the horn... By the time I reacted and shoved my brother out of the way, it was too late.”

 

“You almost died, Loki.”

 

“Mm.”

 

“I thought you guys were immortal.”

 

Loki gave a pained laugh. “No. We have our weaknesses, believe me. My kind more than the Æsir, it seems.”

 

“What do you mean, ‘your kind?’” Tony asked with a questioning frown.

 

Loki raised an eyebrow. “Thor never told you? You knew I was adopted, right?”

 

“Yeah, he mentioned that.”

 

Loki snickered. “He didn’t tell you the whole story, of course.” Loki gave Tony a rundown on his birth, on his true form, and how Odin had placed a lifelong spell upon him to change his appearance.

 

After he’d finished, Tony was quiet.

 

Loki gave a bitter huff. “So... how does it feel, knowing you’ve been fucking a monster?” 

 

Tony took his hand. “You’re not a monster.”

 

“If I took on my Jotun form, you’d change your tune.”

 

Tony met his eyes with a level gaze. “Try me.”

 

Loki leaned his head back and closed his eyes. Tony watched in fascination as Loki’s skin became a soft blue color, then deepened to indigo. Tribal markings appeared, and when Loki raised his head, his eyes glowed red. 

 

Tony’s mouth fell open.

 

Loki gave a soft laugh as his skin color gradually faded and his eyes became their normal green. “You see? You can’t even find the words to express your disgust.” He shook his head and stared out the window. “Don’t worry. As soon as I recover sufficiently, I’ll be on my way.”

 

Tony cleared his throat and swiped a hand over his eyes. “Okay, I’m not saying that wouldn’t take some getting used to. I mean, two seconds isn’t long enough to sort of... wrap my mind around that. But it doesn’t mean that I think you’re a monster, or that there’s anything wrong with you. And, by the way, I’m really getting pissed at how badly you underestimate me. I know I’ve been a little... insensitive here and there, but hey, at least I’m trying, which is more than I can say for you.”

 

Loki’s brows knit together in as stormy a look as he could manage. “What do you mean?”

 

“Well, it’s not like you’ve gone out of your way to work with me, is it? You get mad, and then, poof, you just disappear, and I have no way of contacting you. I mean, I’ll do whatever it takes—gifts, flowers, self-flagellation, anything—to make things right when I’ve screwed up, but you won’t let me. Why, I bet if Big Bubba Thor hadn’t brought you here after you got hurt, I’d still be sitting on my thumb, wondering if I’d ever get to see you again. Right?”

 

Loki shifted uncomfortably. “Most likely.”

 

“Yeah, see? It’s a two-way street, dude.”

 

“What is?”

 

“Being in a relationship!”

 

A slightly amused grimace crossed Loki’s face. _“Relationship?_ Are you seriously under the misapprehension that we’re in a relationship? How? When did this happen? Oh, perhaps it was between the time I was forced to pretend to be an absolute moron about Midgardian pastimes in order to be granted the pleasure of your company for one lousy evening, and the time I had to transform myself into a woman to prevent your closest friends from cottoning to the fact that you deigned to share a meal with me. You’re subtle, my friend, because I certainly didn’t feel like I was being included in any sort of _relationship,_ other than to perform as your own personal circus bear _.”_

 

Loki looked exhausted by the end of his rant, and Tony felt confused between anger and guilt. He stood up and stalked to the window, forcing himself to get a hold on his emotions. He then turned and went back to Loki.

 

“You expect too much.” Tony spoke in a reasoned tone, but Loki could hear the barely-concealed anger underneath it. “You think this is easy for me? You think I’m just being an asshole all the time? I’m worried about a few things, not the least of which is that if Fury and S.H.I.E.L.D. find out about you, that you’ll be nabbed and God knows what’ll be done to you then.”

 

“I told you, I’m not afraid of them. They can’t contain me, I would just—”

 

“Just disappear? Sure. Look at you now. You can’t even come up with a pair of jeans and a t-shirt in your size, hell, you can barely sit up straight without looking like you’re going to pass out. What do you think you could do if Nick Fury came through that door right this minute?”

 

“I _will_ recover, Stark. This is a very unusual circumstance—”

 

“Life is full of unusual circumstances.”

 

Loki sighed and let his head tip back against the chair. “True. But, I really don’t care to argue anymore, if you don’t mind. I’d like to... lie down for a while. Please.”

 

Tony’s expression softened. He got up and found a t-shirt and a pair of brand-new sleep pants from his dresser. “Here. Pepper got me these and they’re too big. Should just about fit _you,_ Daddy Long-Legs.”

 

Loki took them, and nodded his gratitude. 

 

Tony stood, leaned down, and pressed a kiss onto Loki’s cheek. “Do you need help getting dressed and back in bed?”

 

“N-no. I’ll manage.”

 

“Okay. Well, I’ve got stuff I need to do. If you need anything, just speak to JARVIS—I’ll instruct him to respond to your voice.”

 

“All right.” 

 

“I’ll check on you later.”

 

“Fine.”

 

Tony stood looking at Loki until Loki finally looked up at Tony. “Yes?”

 

“Are you still mad at me?”

 

Loki rolled his eyes. “Honestly, you are the most exasperating creature. I probably am, but fortunately for you, I can’t remember why. So for now, let’s just pretend I’m not, and you can go on about your business. I’ll... turn you into a warthog later.” He made a dismissive motion with his hand.

 

“I’d be a sexy damn warthog.”

 

“No doubt.” Loki looked up again and a grin stole across his face. Tony grinned back.

 

“I’ll see  you later. _Right?_ No disappearing on me?”

 

“I couldn’t if I wanted to. And, I don’t want to. Yet.”

 

Tony gripped his chin and gave him a warm kiss. “Good. I’m going to do my damndest to keep it that way.” Tony gave him one more peck and then left, headed for his workroom.

 

Loki regarded the odd Midgardian clothing he’d been given and smiled. The pajama pants were a rather feminine shade of purple with something called “Hello Kitty” imprinted all over them. Loki examined the label and saw that they were a ladies’ size “large.” He almost laughed out loud as he approvingly thought, _“Pepper Potts is a cruel woman.”_

 

He then began the excruciating task of slipping them on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	8. Chicken Soup for the Mischief God's Soul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki reflects, Tony worries, and they have a nice bowl of soup together.

It was now rather obvious to Loki that his body was intent on betraying him in every way possible. Oh, the stabbing pain in his gut had subsided to a hot, dull ache, and the cuts and bruises all over his body had faded, leaving nothing but little jabbing reminders when he inadvertently touched them, and the seam where the torn flesh of his side had knit back together now just felt itchy and tight. He’d managed to dress himself and crawl back into Starks’s bed, settling on what he absurdly had come to think of as “his” side, without assistance. And, his mind was clearing, his memory of the battle on Trondheim—and what came after—coming back in full force.

 

But, he still felt lethargic and fragile, still felt as if any sudden movement might rip his insides apart. Stark was right, he couldn’t trust his body to support him in the event of an attack. And, his magic... 

 

That above all was the most puzzling thing, and the most disturbing.

 

It wasn’t gone. Far from it. Instead, it felt _heavy_ , cloying, like a huge feather pillow being held to his face. When he’d tried to conjure his clothing, instead of the expected crackle of energy coursing through his body, he’d felt a dull “thunk,” as if he’d tried to roll a boulder out of his path. And, nothing had happened, as he’d pulled back the moment his _seidr_ resisted, but he wasn’t sure what would have resulted if he’d allowed it to go on.

 

Perhaps he’d have produced a full-sized space-rhinoceros, as Tony called it, to be deposited in the middle of of the billionaire’s bath chamber. A smile tugged at his lips at the thought, but then a little shiver of distress went through him. Who knew _what_ might happen, with him in this state? He’d never experienced anything like it before. Never heard of it happening to anyone else either, although he had a vague memory of one of Frigga’s handmaidens laughing about how her _seidr_ had gone haywire when she was expecting a baby. Loki rolled his eyes. 

 

 _It’s a bloody good thing men can’t get pregnant,_ he thought with some amusement. _I’d make a wretched parent._

 

He closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep—he was past simple exhaustion, well into some sort of physical systems breakdown that was only just beginning to repair itself—but his limbs were restless and he hurt too much to toss and turn as they commanded him to do. He thought of asking JARVIS to send Tony up to amuse him, but of course that would be incredibly rude. Not that he cared. But he had a feeling he was going to be stuck in the halls of Stark Tower for a while during his recovery, and he supposed it would behoove him to stay in his host’s good graces for as long as possible.

 

And, anyway, Stark was probably napping himself, having spent the night in that uncomfortable chair. Loki remembered coming to consciousness in the night and finding Tony sitting right beside him, holding his hand. His stomach dipped at the memory—he’d seen Odin like that once, sitting up into the early morning hours beside Frigga. He’d been very small at the time, and it was only much later that he’d learned Frigga had had a miscarriage, but to his boyish eyes, it had seemed like the most romantic thing in the world, staying up with your love when they weren’t feeling well. 

 

He wondered what had been in Tony’s head when he took his hand.

 

He shoved the thought aside and gave up on sleep. He tentatively imagined the television set coming on, but felt that same resistance and hastily canceled the image in his mind, worried that the damn thing might blow up. He grinned at that mental image—oh, that would definitely irritate the billionaire, especially considering that Loki would have not one clue as to how to repair it, even if his magic was behaving properly.

 

Instead, he found the television remote and took a moment to study it. He understood perfectly well how _that_ worked, and he’d seen both Tony and Thor use one, but he’d never had occasion to do so himself. He had a surge of frustration when he punched a few buttons with no result. Then, he turned it around, and rolled his eyes at his own stupidity when the device sprang to life. 

 

Loki contentedly “channel surfed,” as it was apparently called, for a long while, amazed at the vapidness of what the mortals apparently considered to be entertainment. He eventually came across the station that Thor had introduced him to, TV Land. He  watched an old episode of Leave it to Beaver, amused and bewildered by the insipid Midgardian version of a family with two brothers—he could rather see Thor as Wally, but young Theodore was far too guileless and inept for him to identify with him in the least—and then at the station break it was announced that the next show would be something called “Bewitched.” Loki liked the sound of that title, wondering what it could possibly refer to, given the staunch disregard given to magic and witchery by this realm.

 

But, he was intrigued to discover that the show featured yet another “typical” American family, only in this one, the wife was a beautiful blonde witch. He was instantly disgusted at the basic premise—for some unfathomable reason, Samantha was not to use her magical talents under any circumstances, although, of course, she used them all the time, thus constantly bringing dishonor and humiliation to her fool of a husband—but Loki loved seeing the Midgardian notions about witchcraft played out in a production intended for family viewing. “Such hypocrites,” he thought, shaking his head.

 

He watched for a while, and had nearly slipped into sleep when he realized that, in this particular episode, Samantha’s magic wasn’t working. His curiosity was piqued, and he roused himself, soon drawn into the story. He chuckled in amusement each time Samantha attempted to cast a spell, only for it to go comically wrong. The source of the problem turned out to be exposure to an exotic flower, but his brow knit as that led to another thought—could there have been some sort of poison on the horn of the beast that gored him? He mulled that over, shaking his head as he rejected the notion. No, his magic had worked well enough to keep him alive and to mend his open wounds; surely any poisonous effects would have been instantaneous. Still, it was something to explore if his _seidr_ continued to malfunction.

 

The show ended, and Loki clicked off the TV. He felt a little better and found the strength to pull himself out of bed and pad barefoot to the window seat, carrying a couple of extra pillows with him. He settled in cozily, resting his head against the cool glass. It was nice to be out of bed in a chamber so high above the ground, and he was glad to watch the sprawling city bustling along on its way to a full recovery from the destruction he himself had wrought upon it. 

 

*****

 

Tony puttered in his workshop for a few hours, but he found it hard to concentrate. He kept bugging JARVIS with questions like, “What’s Loki doing?” and “What’s he doing _now?”_ and “What do you mean, he’s doing nothing? He’s breathing, right? Wait—he _is_ breathing, right?” and  “Does he look okay to you?” and “Is he asleep?” and “I wonder why he’s not asleep,” and “Has he said anything?” and “Are you _sure_ he hasn’t said anything?” and “Do you think he wants something to drink?” and “Oh, he’s watching TV now? What’s he watching? Does he like it? You think he’d like to watch a movie instead?” He thought he heard an actual note of exasperation in JARVIS’ AI voice when he suggested that perhaps Tony ought to go check on Loki, himself.

 

“No, man, I’m too busy.” Tony picked up a random screwdriver and waved it in the general direction of the security camera. “See? I’m swamped, I don’t have time to go playing nursemaid to an alien god. That’s what I have you for, isn’t it?”

 

“Of course, sir. It’s just that, you seem very concerned about your guest’s well-being, and since my observations don’t seem to have satisfied your curiosity, perhaps you should go take a look at him yourself.”

 

“Yeah, well, I’m up to my ears here in work.” Tony gestured at nothing in particular, frowning. “You sure he hasn’t said anything? Hasn’t, you know, asked for me or anything?”

 

“Quite sure, sir.”

 

“Well, good, that’s good. He’s probably fine, then. Although... I bet he’s hungry. Do you think he’s hungry?”

 

“I wouldn’t know, sir. Shall I ask him?”

 

“Nah, don’t bother, he’s got to be hungry. I mean, _I’m_ hungry. What do you think he could eat?”

 

“Given the nature of his injuries, perhaps something gentle on the stomach such as soup would be best.”

 

Tony brightened. “Soup! Sure. Listen, have a couple of orders of chicken noodle delivered asap and let me know when it gets here. I’ll take it up to him myself.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

“Great. That’ll give me time to... get some more work done down here.” Tony very efficiently put the screwdriver back on his work table, lining it up neatly with several other recently unused tools, and then he turned to head up to his living quarters to find something soothing for Loki to drink and maybe to see if he’d like to watch a movie with him.

 

*****

 

Tony carried a tray with bowls of hot soup and cold drinks to his bedroom and lightly rapped on the door before opening it and swiveling to set the tray on the nightstand. But, Loki wasn’t in the bed. 

 

Tony felt an irrational moment of panic—all he needed was for Loki to go roaming around Stark Tower, injured and with bad juju going on—but he caught sight of a hand combing through dark hair, and then he saw Loki sitting by the window.

 

“Oh, there you are. What’re you doing out of bed?” Tony brought the tray over to the lounging area and set it on a coffee table.

 

“I couldn’t bear to lie there another minute. My legs feel like they’re made of lead.”

 

“I brought you some soup.”

 

Loki hadn’t bothered to turn to look when Tony came in, but now he gave the tray an interested glance. “Soup? What sort?”

 

“Chicken noodle. The best in town. Hungry?”

 

“I am, a bit.” He took the proffered bowl from Tony, tipped his head in thanks, and then took a tentative spoonful. He nodded. “Very nice. Easy to digest. Reminds me of a concoction my mother used to make for Thor and I when we were small.”

 

Tony gave him an amused grin. “Your mom is, what, like, queen of Asgard? And she used to make you guys soup?”

 

“Oh, we had servants to prepare meals, but she enjoyed cooking for us. Said she liked making sure her boys were properly nourished while going about the business of leveling the palace on a daily basis.” He had a sad smile on his face and looked to be miles away.

 

“She must be a good mom.”

 

Loki nodded firmly. “Yes. She never... distinguished between Thor and I. We were both her sons.” He took a deep breath and a pained look crossed his face. Tony wasn’t sure whether it came from the effects of his recent injury, or from a long ago hurt of a different sort.

 

They fell silent for a while, concentrating on the soup and their own thoughts. When they were nearly finished, Tony spoke up. “So, I’ve still got a ton of stuff to do, but I was thinking—maybe we could watch a movie later. We could order in and eat and watch in bed, have our own personal slumber party in our jammies. What do you think?”

 

Loki frowned slightly. “Well, that brings up a question. I can’t go anywhere until I regain proper use of my magic, so I’ll have to stay another night or two, at least. But, I’ll not depose you from your own bed, and I’m sure you don’t care to sleep beside me when I’m not well enough to provide you with sexual diversion. Where would you have me pass the night? Anything will do, I’m accustomed to far less hospitable accommodations that this, I can assure you.”

 

Loki scraped up the last spoonful noodles and popped it in his mouth before looking up to see Tony staring at him with an aggrieved expression on his face. "What?" he asked.

 

“You’re a trip, you know that?” Tony huffed in exasperation. “You really think the only reason I’d want to spend the night with you is for sex?”

 

“Given our history, it’s really the only explanation that makes sense,” Loki said reasonably.

 

“For your information, I’ve been waiting a long time—a _damned_ long time—to sleep with you. I mean, I’ve done some really cool things in my life, my bucket list is shorter than most, but one thing I’ve always wanted to do is to fall asleep beside a goddamned space alien god of mischief, and, sure, I’ve come _this close,”_ he said, holding up his pinched thumb and forefinger, “...on a couple of occasions, but, hmm, somehow it never worked out, and gee, whose fault is that, I wonder? So, yeah. If you think I’m going to miss out on my chance to take advantage of your feeble state to hold you, and like, _cuddle_ under the covers with you, and maybe even wake up in the friggin’ morning with you, you’re crazy. Sorry, no offense, that was... insensitive. Really sorry, don’t disappear.” Tony was blinking a bit rapidly by now.

 

“As I believe I mentioned earlier, I couldn’t if I wanted to,” Loki said dryly. “And, I still don’t want to. Although, I’m not much of a cuddler. But, the rest of it... sounds fine. The movie, and such, I mean. And, waking up together. That would be—pleasant, I think.” He looked down into his mostly empty soup bowl and idly poked at a scrap of chicken with his spoon.

 

“In the interest of full disclosure, I do have pretty aggressive morning farts,” Tony admitted bravely.

 

Loki broke into a full-on grin. “Well. I daresay you’d have to go some to rival a few of my previous bedmates. And, that’s just the women.”

 

Tony cracked up. “Well, I’ll let you be the judge of that. Okay. I’ll be back around dinner time. Be thinking of what you want to order, and look at the pay-per-view channels and pick a movie. Anything else you need in the meantime?”

 

“No, I have all I need.”

 

Tony began striding to the door, when he heard Loki say, “Tony?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“You were wrong.”

 

“About what?”

 

“When you said I haven’t been trying. I _have_ been trying. I suppose it’s difficult to tell, but... I _do_ expect too much, you were right about that. It’s just that, every time I’ve cared for someone, they’ve disappointed me. And, it’s not even their fault, usually. I just want so much for things to be a certain way, and when they’re not, it hurts. Because, in truth, the fault usually lies with me.” He shrugged. “I’m sorry for running away before. I won’t do it again, even when I’m able.” 

 

Tony came back to his side, leaned down and took his face in his hands. He gave him a warm, lingering kiss. “That’s the best news I’ve had in a long time.”

 

“I doubt it. You’ll be begging me to leave before long.”

 

“Probably. I’m looking forward to getting to that point, though.”

 

Loki chuckled, but then grimaced and clutched his side. “Bloody hell, Stark. don’t make me laugh, it hurts.”

 

“Then, get your ass back in bed and rest. Come on, I’ll help you.” Tony gave Loki an arm and they made their way to the bed. Loki slowly eased himself down, and Tony covered him up before pressing a kiss on his cheek. “There. Now, stay put and I’ll see you later, okay?”

 

“Okay.”

 

“Good. Oh, and about the disappearing act? I forgive you.”

 

Loki raised tired eyes to his. “Really?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Good. Thank you. And I forgive you, too.”

 

Tony sighed elaborately. “For what?”

 

“For being an ass—on numerous occasions.” 

 

“Well, I hope I built up some credit over the last day or so, ‘cause that shit’s congenital with me.”

 

“Mm. Well, I suppose we both have some issues to work on.”

 

“There you go—Loki, master of the understatement.” Tony gave him another kiss and a wink goodbye, and then headed back to his lab, where, miraculously, he managed to work for over two full hours before asking JARVIS what Loki was doing.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	9. Gentle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's feeling better and sexy-times ensue.

Tony brought up his and Loki’s order of Thai food. 

 

Loki had taken over the bed with books, magazines, and scattered pillows, and as Tony stripped down to a t-shirt and underwear, Loki quickly made room for him to join him under the covers. Tony turned down the lights; Loki had chosen a shark attack movie for them to watch, and they were soon absorbed in laughing at the absurd plot and gratuitous violence as they ate by the glow of the large television screen.

 

“Well, that was pretty good,” Tony said approvingly as the end credits began to roll. “There’s another one coming up, let’s see—‘Mega Shark versus the Giant Octopus’—how does that sound?”

 

Loki chuckled. “It sounds ridiculous. Very tempting, but...” He stifled a yawn. “I think I might just go to sleep. Feel free to keep watching, though, it won’t bother me in the least.”

 

“Nah, that’s okay. I’ve killed off enough brain cells for one night.”

 

Loki bit his lip before asking, “Are you certain you don’t want me to move to another of your bedchambers?”

 

“Yes, I’m _certain,”_ Tony said in mild exasperation. “I like this arrangement—quit worrying. I told you, I want to wake up next to you for a change.”

 

“Very well.” Loki smiled. “In that case, good night.” He scooted a little farther away from Tony, pulled the covers over himself and closed his eyes. Tony gave him an appraising look.

 

“How’re you feeling?” 

 

Loki opened his eyes. “I’m well enough. The pain is gone, for the most part.”

 

“Let me see your boo-boo.”

 

Loki raised himself on one elbow and gave him a bewildered glare. “My _what?”_

 

Tony gestured in the direction of Loki’s belly. “Your ouchie, you know, where the space-rhino gored you.”

 

“Oh! All right.” Loki pulled up his t-shirt and turned on his side so that Tony could examine the nearly-healed wound. Impressed, Tony gave a whistle.

 

“Wow. You can hardly tell that there was a huge gaping hole in your tummy just twenty-four hours ago.”

 

“Yes. I really think that with a decent night’s sleep, I’ll be fully recovered by morning.”

 

“Wow. That’s hard to believe, but good... Well, I’m beat, too. I think I’ll join you in dreamland.” Tony flicked off the TV and then got up to clear away their dinner tray before turning off the light and nestling in beside Loki. “Come’ere,” he said, holding his arms open.

 

Loki gave him a dubious look. “I told you, I’m not a cuddler. This is a huge bed, you have plenty of room on your side.”

 

“Okay, no cuddling. Fine, then let’s talk shark movies. What’d you think of the production values on that one? I thought the cinematography was above average for this type of thing, but don’t you agree the plot dragged a little in the third act? Oh, and could you tell when they shifted to CGI? I—”

 

Loki rolled his eyes. “I don’t think there’s enough substance in the entire shark film genre to support an in-depth discussion, and anyway, I did mention wanting to go to sleep, did I not?”

 

“All right, not interested in film analysis, no problem. Let’s dish. What do you think Thor and Jane Foster do in bed? Think they get kinky? You’re his brother, I bet you’ve seen his dick, is he huge?”

 

Loki shot a baleful expression at Tony, but took a moment to appear to give Tony’s questions deep consideration. “Hmm, let’s see—one, I don’t care; two, I have no idea; and, three, yes, but not so large as you’d think, given his height. Now, please be quiet.”

 

“Well, I wish I could, but I’ve got all these cuddling urges coursing through my veins, and I’m sorry, but if they go unsatisfied, they’re going to come out through my mouth. It’s a thing, look it up. So—”

 

With an exaggerated sigh, Loki rolled into Tony’s arms. Tony gave a low laugh and pulled him closer. “Ah, that’s better. I’ll hardly have to talk at all now. In fact, if I could just get a kiss, I might even be able to go to slee—”

 

Now Loki was laughing, too. “Gods, you’re a needy bastard. Here...” Loki gave him a deep, soulful kiss and then nestled against him. “Now, if you could possibly shut the fuck up, I would be very grateful.”

 

“I’ll see what I can do.” Tony yawned luxuriously, and soon they were both sound asleep.

 

* * *

 

 

It was a miracle. 

 

Tony woke up at dawn and found Loki still in his arms. He’d twisted and turned in the night, and now his back was to Tony’s chest, but the length of his body was still pressed in close and their legs were tangled together. Tony managed to suppress a triumphant “Woo-hoo!” and just gathered Loki closer. 

 

In the dim gray morning light he was able to study Loki more intimately than ever before, and he reveled in the little details. The way thick strands of long black hair had fallen aside, revealing an undergrowth of soft curls resting on his slender neck. The elegant line of Loki’s arm, pale skin covering well-defined musculature. Tapered fingers, deft and graceful, just as capable of wielding a weapon as a paintbrush. Tony inhaled him, and listened to his steady breathing and felt the rhythmic beat of his heart. He hadn’t been kidding when he told Loki he’d waited a long time to wake up next to him, and now he realized that, _damn,_ it was worth every impatient moment. 

 

Loki stirred. He gasped, startled, and then turned to see Tony beside him and the confusion in his eyes disappeared. A slow, lazy grin crossed his lips and he turned over to face his bedmate. “Hello, human,” he said in a quiet rasp.

 

“Well, hello, beautiful.” 

 

“Hm, do you think me so?” With his forefinger, Loki traced a line from Tony’s dark eyebrow down over his cheekbone to his lips. “You’re a rather decent specimen, yourself.”

 

Tony frowned thoughtfully. “I guess that’s your idea of a compliment?”

 

“It is.” Loki kissed him and then pulled back, something primitive shimmering in his dark green eyes. He slid a hand down Tony’s back, holding him in place as he pressed his groin against the swell of Tony’s morning erection. “Well. It appears we’re both waking up in a similar condition.”

 

The friction Loki created was delicious and Tony’s cock got even harder, straining against his silk shorts. “Ah—damn it, man, what’re you doing to me? I’m not so good at the whole delayed gratification thing, and—”

 

“Who said anything about a delay?” Loki chuckled and moved to take off his Hello Kitty sleep pants. “I have no intention of postponing a tryst with you any longer. Come along, mortal, drop your knickers and let’s get on with it.” Loki pulled the t-shirt over his head and lay back wantonly, giving Tony a lascivious grin as he spread his knees apart.

 

Tony felt like a dog being served a steak dinner, but he forced himself to take a deep, calming breath. “Okay, let’s discuss. Day before yesterday, you _almost_ _died_ , remember? And you were in so much pain yesterday morning you couldn’t dress yourself. And now you’re all ready for a little sexy-time action? I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

 

“I’m _fine._ Look.” Loki pointed at the scar from his injury; this morning, it was nothing but a faint line, barely noticeable. “See? I’m healed, there’s nothing to worry about.”

 

“But—”

 

“We gods heal quickly. If you’ll recall, I was tossed around like a rag doll by your gigantic green beast, yet I was on my feet asking for a drink mere moments afterwards. Which you never did get for me, by the way.” Loki had a teasing tone in his voice and he reached out to cup Tony’s chin in his hand. “I promise you, I’m perfectly well, barring my magical abilities which are still unstable. But, that has nothing to do with _this.”_ He kissed Tony again. “Please don’t worry. I’ll tell you if I feel any discomfort. All right?”

 

“Do you know how dead I would be if I hurt you with my dick and had to explain that to your big brother?” 

 

“I seriously question how much damage that minute little organ of yours could actually do, so it’s a moot point.”

 

“You know, you’re hot, but your sexy-talk could use some work.”

 

“You seem to like it just fine,” Loki purred, sliding his hand into Tony’s shorts and gripping him tightly. 

 

Tony made a choked sound and with supreme effort took Loki’s hand and pulled it away. “Yeah, okay, I kind of like the abuse, but really, Loki, I’m just afraid we might—”

 

A thunderous expression crossed Loki’s face.

 

“Why must I always romance you into fucking me?” he exclaimed bitterly. “I know my own body, Stark. If I say it’s all right, it’s all right. Now, shall we do this, or should I take advantage of whatever means of transportation you Midgardians employ to depart from an inhospitable host’s bed?”

 

“Now, chill out, Shakespeare,” Tony said soothingly. “I’m just trying to take care of you.” He caressed Loki’s face and then took him in his arms. “I just want you to be okay.”

 

Loki allowed himself to be held and his momentary irritation subsided. “Oh. Well. I... I appreciate that.” He pulled back and looked into Tony’s eyes. “I’m well, Tony, I promise you. Please... I want you.”

 

“I want you, too.”

 

“Then, have me.” Loki’s wicked smile was back and he pulled Tony on top of him.

 

 

* * *

 

 

This time, it was gentle. 

 

Tony refused to hurry, pointedly ignoring the initial onslaught of Loki’s goading insults. He shushed him and concentrated on nibbling his neck, laving his nipples, and caressing his back and the taut lines of his belly with faint brushes of his fingertips. He kissed Loki slow and easy, dipping his tongue between his lips and licking the warm slickness he found inside them. He murmured soft little endearments, words Loki had heard rarely in connection with himself, and the god found that his sharp tongue had somehow been stilled, given over to breathing soft moans and whispering Tony’s name.

 

For Loki, sex had always been a cerebral business, his mind always calculating, even down to which particular movement would bring the most pleasure to himself while at the same time bestowing whatever effect he desired onto his partner. He always held tight control, determined that he not allow himself to make the stupid mistake of trusting another with his mind, his body, or his heart.

 

How funny that all that power, all that control, could be stripped away by one cock-sure little human. 

 

Tony’s hands were strong, and he seemed to know just where to touch, to stroke, to  probe to make Loki lose himself. Loki felt like a drowning man pulled out of the water, gasping as he filled his lungs with good clean air. For the first time in his life, he didn’t care what would come later. As Tony entered his body, Loki felt like weeping, because Tony was _careful._ Because Tony asked “You okay?” when his breath hitched, because Tony held him and kissed him even when he was fucking into him hard and fast, and because Tony made him feel like he was the only thing in the world that mattered, the only thing that he loved. 

 

Loki knew he was a fool, but he didn’t care. Whatever Tony was willing to give, he would take. Even if it all ended tomorrow, he _wanted_ this, wanted these memories of being held and loved, memories of a time when someone cared enough to call him “sweetheart” and to whisper “You’re my angel, my baby,” in his ear, even if he didn’t really mean it. 

 

He’d need those memories for those times ahead that were sure to come, when he would be left beaten and broken and alone. 

 

He’d need to remember that, once, there was someone who’d cared enough to be gentle with him.

 

 

 

 


	10. Loki's Keeper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony has to go to work, but he doesn't want to leave Loki by himself all day.

Tony and Loki couldn’t quite persuade themselves to get out of bed. They stayed snuggled together with their faces just inches apart, allowing for easy access to each other’s lips. They teased with naughty fingertips, pinching soft nipples into hard peaks, stroking the outline of biceps flexing under smooth skin; they combed through the thatches of hair under their arms and above their cocks, and then drew lines and circles on sensitive flesh, sometimes a scratch, sometimes a tickle, each eliciting a laugh, a moan, a gasp. 

 

They spoke in low whispers, silly random thoughts that would have made no sense in the harsh light of day, but which now made each other giggle like children. Tony relished the feel of Loki’s lithe frame pressed against him and lost himself in ocean-colored eyes that seemed to hold the secrets of the moon and the stars.

 

And Loki, Loki felt an unfamiliar fullness in his heart as his hands spanned the the bulk of Tony’s muscles, as his thin pale lips met Tony’s full red ones. He’d never have admitted it in a thousand Midgardian years, but he loved Tony’s dark eyes, the little lines that crinkled when he smiled, how they sparkled when he talked, and the way Loki felt like he was falling when he looked into them in quiet moments like this.

 

In a burst of self-awareness, it occurred to Tony that they were acting like sappy teenagers, stupidly giddy to be left home alone without adult supervision. But, with the blankets for a cocoon and the bed their whole world, he didn’t give a fuck; he’d have been content to stay nestled with Loki like that forever, or at least until their bladders threatened to blow up, or their stomachs’ rumbling drove them to the kitchen—or, until the harsh blare of Tony’s cell phone forced them to scramble apart. 

 

Which it did.

 

“Damn it,” Tony swore as he fumbled for the accursed device.

 

“Can you not silence that thing?” Loki asked plaintively, holding his fingers in his ears.

 

“I can’t do it with my _mind,”_ Tony retorted in frustration as his fingers struck the phone, sending it to land behind the nightstand just beyond his reach. He slid down the side of the bed, his naked butt sticking up in the air as he blindly strained to reach the cell, making Loki laugh.

 

“Now, that’s a fine sight with which to greet the day,” he said approvingly.

 

Tony managed to retrieve the still-jangling phone, and he sneered as he settled back against the headboard. “Shut up, you know you want it. And, now all the blood’s rushed to my head, the very _opposite_ of where I like it to be.” He sniffed in annoyance, punched “talk,” and barked, “Yeah,” none too happily.

 

“Well, good morning to you, too,” Pepper said in a warm lilt. 

 

“Hi, Pep. Sorry, I was... sleeping.”

 

“Oh, really. Nice try, but this is not your Pepper-woke-me-up voice. This is your I was-busy-canoodling-and-Pepper-interrupted-a-pivotal-moment voice. Who is she?” Pepper sounded amused.

 

“Uh... Miss, may I ask what this call is in reference to? If this is about my overdue electric bill, I swear, the check is in the mail. Please don’t shut off my lights.”

 

“You have a ten-o’clock shareholders meeting. I know this comes as a shock to you because the notice only came out two weeks ago, and wow, silly me, I only put the reminder on your desk calendar, your Outlook calendar, _and_ the Betty Boop calendar you have hanging in the kitchen, when clearly I should have tattooed it on your forehead—”

 

“Wait, is that what that big red circle was for? I thought it meant my period was due. In which case, oops, looks like a shotgun wedding might be in order, ‘cause Auntie Flo hasn’t made her monthly visit yet, and I—”

 

“Tony, it’s 9:15. Get your your ass out of bed, shower, and get over here pronto, do you hear me?”

 

“You want me to come straight from the shower? Because, the shareholders seemed to think I was a little underdressed last time I did that.”

 

“Put on clothes, please.”

 

“Okay, great, sounds like a plan. I’ll see you in a few.”

 

“See that it’s a _very_ few. Don’t make me come over there.”

 

Tony’s eyes widened at the thought. He glanced over at Loki, who was now stretched out naked, his head propped on one hand, the other idly scratching behind a bent knee, listening to Tony’s end of the conversation with an interested expression. “God _damn,_ he’s freakin’ hot,”Tony thought with a little jump of excitement. Yeah, all he needed was for Pepper to walk in on _that._ “Don’t worry, Pep, I’ll be right there, as promised.”

 

“Good. That would be good.” Pepper hung up, and Tony turned regretfully to Loki.

 

“I’m sorry, babe, I’ve got to go to work.” He kissed Loki and tried to ignore the stormy expression that crossed the god’s face as Tony rolled out of bed and headed toward the shower. When he returned, he noticed that Loki was standing by the window, dressed in his t-shirt and sleep pants. He turned and gave Tony a sour look. 

 

Loki had known perfectly well that this was going to happen. Of course it would—he understood the responsibilities laid upon the shoulders of one leading many, whether they be in the form of a battalion or a multi-billion dollar corporation. But, somehow he’d hoped he might have just one measly day with Tony before he was pulled away, now that they were getting along and Loki was recovered well enough to enjoy it. He made no attempt to disguise his irritation.

 

“And what am I to do all day while you’re gone?” Loki asked sulkily.

 

“I’ve taken care of that. I’ve arranged a play date for you.”

 

Loki’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “What the hell does that mean?”

 

“I’ve got Thor coming over to hang out with you.”

 

_“Thor?”_ Loki gaped at Tony. _“Why?”_

 

“Well, whether you admit it or not, you’re still recovering and I don’t want you to overdo it. Plus, you don’t have your magic and you might need help with some of our mysterious Midgardian devices, like the ice-dispenser and the microwave.”

 

Loki snarled. “And, you think _Thor_ will prove useful in that regard?”

 

“He’s hep to the microwave. Well, I’m pretty sure. Okay, maybe don’t use the microwave. I know he can use the _stove._ I mean _,_ I think he can, seems like Jane mentioned him heating up a can of soup one time, but now that I think of it, he might have built a fire in the oven or something. Listen, just order a pizza, huh? The number’s on the fridge and I’ll leave some money on the counter.”

 

“I don’t want to see him!” Loki snapped. He then looked down at himself. “And, I don’t want him to see _me_. I-I’m weak. And, I look pathetic in this attire.”

 

“Hey.” Tony went to Loki. “First of all, you’ve survived a pretty rotten ordeal. Thor’s not going to think you’re weak if you don’t go around zapping this and disappearing that. And, as for the clothes? Not a problem. I ordered some for you. Of course, I didn’t know your exact size, but I just told ‘em ‘tall, skinny and hot,’ so they ought to fit. I’ll bring them up, why don’t you hop in the shower in the meantime?”

 

Loki gave him a dubious sneer, but Tony threw on a robe and went to check the mail. He grabbed the packages that had come in and then went back to his bedroom and was glad to hear the shower going, suggesting that Loki was willing to give him at least a tad bit of cooperation. Tony hastily got dressed and had just finished when Loki emerged, a towel draped around his waist. His hair was wet and he gestured at it impatiently.

 

“It’s most inconvenient, washing my hair without _seidr_ to dry it. Don’t you have one of those Midgardian devices you mentioned to assist in such a task?”

 

“Uh, yeah.” Tony got the hair dryer and showed Loki how to use it, and then continued sharing his vision for Loki’s day. “You and Point Break can swim if you  want. Play pool, watch movies...I’ve got tons of video games, plus old-fashioned stuff like board games and chess. Oh, and I re-programmed JARVIS so that he’ll alert you if _anybody_ , including Pepper, approaches an entrance. You can go anywhere you want and still have plenty of time to make yourself scarce if someone unexpectedly shows up, so feel free to explore. Just stay out of my lab, I want to show you that myself sometime, and—”

 

Only half-listening, Loki had sorted through the clothes Tony had brought him and he dressed himself in snug black jeans and a dusky green cashmere sweater, causing Tony to stop in mid-sentence at the sight standing before him. 

 

Loki, tall and thin, serpentine and regal, looking for all the world like... 

 

Like a goddamn alien god. 

 

“Well,  _fuck...”_ was all Tony could utter as his stomach fluttered with desire.

 

The clothes made Loki feel better somehow. Stronger, more in control. He shot Tony a searing look. “I don’t need a baby-sitter, Stark. Nor a keeper. Inform Thor that he is not to come, and do it _now,_ before he—”

 

Just then, a clap of thunder rattled the walls and a bolt of lightening lit up the room.

 

“Oops. Too late,” Tony said, turning his mouth down in mock regret. He pushed aside another churn of lust at Loki’s beautiful-but-tempestuous expression, strode over to him and put his hands on his shoulders. He stared intently into Loki’s eyes and said, “Listen, you. Be good. And, be nice to Thor. He’s doing me a favor, get it?” He then kissed Loki passionately. “I’ll be home as soon as possible and we’ll have a nice evening together, okay?” Not getting an answer, he pulled Loki into a bear-hug and got a begrudging squeeze back; figuring he’d better take what he could get, Tony then turned to head out, leaving a decidedly disgruntled and resentful god behind.

 

* * *

 

 

Thor listened gravely as Tony’s ticked off instructions on his fingers. 

 

“First, make sure he eats, he’s too damn skinny. There’s plenty of stuff in the pantry and fridge, there’s bound to be _something_ in there that he likes. Two, let him have some fun, but try not to destroy anything that costs over a grand to fix, it’s rude. And, three, don’t let him get too tired—you’ll have to watch for that, he’ll never admit it. He’s really freaked out by the idea of you thinking he’s weak or something—”

 

“Yes, on Asgard, it is considered shameful to be hindered by a mere injury, especially if one is Aesir.”

 

“Really? Wow, when I was a kid we’d of milked something like that for all it was worth, if it meant we got to play hooky.”

 

Thor frowned. “Hooky?”

 

“You know, you stay home from school, eat Jello and watch cartoons.”

 

“Ah!” Thor’s eyes lit up; he’d just recently been introduced to Bugs Bunny and Wile E. Coyote. “I can see the appeal of that deception. But, Loki should not feel that way. He suffered a terrible trauma—he should know I would not judge him if he were impeded by its effects. Although, it’s strange that it would take him so long to recover; with his magic and Jotun constitution, he is normally healed even more quickly than most Aesir.”

 

“Yeah, well, you know his magic is on the fritz.”

 

“I beg your pardon?”

 

“It’s, uh, not working right. He doesn’t want to use it in case he blows something up or whatever.”

 

“Really?” A worried look came over Thor’s handsome features. “Hmm. I will have to have a word with Mother about that. Perhaps she can offer some council.” 

 

“What’s the matter, Point Break, you think the space-rhino did some permanent damage?”

 

“That is unlikely. I suspect it’s simply that Loki lost so much blood during his valiant fight that it caused his _seidr_ to become depleted.”

 

“Huh. That reminds me—how’d everything work out on, where was it, Trondheim? You know, after the uprising and all.”

 

“Oh! I think you will find this of interest. I’ve spent most of my time there lately helping to sort out the Trondarian government’s troubles. In the process, I discovered that the insurgents that Loki and I fought had been conspiring with the Chitauri in plotting a second attack on Midgard.” He spoke as casually as if noting that his car needed an oil change, while at the same time becoming occupied with peeling a banana, apparently a relatively new skill for him. He looked up, startled, when Tony yelped, _“What?”_

 

Thor nodded mildly. “Yes. Thank the Norns that Loki had compiled the intelligence leading to their plans being uncovered before they had a chance to bring them to fruition, or we’d be doing battle with those infernal creatures at this very moment.”

 

Tony stared. “Wait a minute—are you saying Loki was responsible for... preventing a second alien attack on Earth?”

 

Thor had finally freed the banana from its peel and he took a generous bite. He peered at Tony as he chewed. “Indeed,” he said with his mouth full.

 

“Shit.” Tony chewed his lip for a moment, and then he pointed excitedly at Thor. “Is there any proof? Any documentation that I could show to Fury?”

 

Thor shrugged uncertainly. “There is evidence that was confiscated from their camp, as well as the governor’s testimony before my father’s court. Would that be of help? I can easily gain access to the transcripts.”

 

“Yeah, yeah, do that—soonish, if possible. Might come in handy at some point.”

 

“Of course.” Thor beamed and spoke warmly. “Father also was most pleased to hear of Loki’s heroism and good work.”

 

“Really? Is he going to let Loki return to Asgard?” Tony wasn’t sure how he felt about that idea.

 

Thor’s happy expression fell. “No. He says it’s too soon, that Loki must continue to prove that he is truly recovered for a while longer before he will consider any supplication to end his banishment.”

 

“So, the poor kid’s still on probation, huh?” A wave of relief went through Tony, immediately followed by shame. He shouldn’t be glad that the god was stuck with him here on Earth indefinitely, but damn it—he was. He pushed the thought aside and focused his anger as he imagined Odin’s imperious decree. “Did Daddy Dearest happen to give a flying fuck that his son nearly died fighting those Trondheim dudes and their battle rhino?”

 

Thor dropped his eyes to the floor. “I would like to think he was... sorry. But, to die in battle is honorable. Father would rather that be Loki’s fate than for him to again bring shame to Odin’s reign.”

 

Tony squelched a bitter retort and changed the subject. “Okay, man. I’ve got to go. Thanks for staying with him, sounds like you’ve got a lot of other stuff demanding your attention.”

 

“Not at all. He _is_ my brother, after all. Oh, and Tony—”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I can’t thank you enough for caring for him as you have. I don’t really understand it—how you found the strength to forgive his actions against your realm in the first place is beyond me—but, you have done an inestimable service for him, and thus, for me as well. I thank you from the depths of my heart.”

 

Tony almost blurted out something highly incriminating regarding his feelings toward Loki, but managed to limit himself to saying, “Hey, I told you—he’s trying to start fresh, do some good stuff with his life. I appreciate that. Plus, he’s... kind of an okay guy, once you get past the whole ‘Kneel before me!’ routine and such.”

 

Thor smiled sadly. “The Loki I grew up with had many endearing qualities. It is my hope that they have survived all that has befallen him, and that one day we may again truly be brothers—and friends.”

 

“Yeah, that’s something to shoot for... Well, you and Rudolf have fun. I have stockholders to dazzle.”

 

Thor watched Tony leave and then headed off to find Loki.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	11. Breakfast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor intends to make sure Loki eats breakfast, but it doesn't go well… Just some silliness with Thor and Loki, but the next chapter will be a bit more serious.

Loki had hidden himself in the hallway leading to the kitchen, and now he stood still, listening to Tony and Thor’s conversation. He grit his teeth as he heard Tony tick off a series of instructions, all of which seemed to serve only to highlight Loki’s weaknesses— _how_ dare _Loki’s pathetic condition be so casually revealed to his colossal oaf of a brother, referring to him as if he were a child or an invalid? Well, that’s Tony-fucking-Stark for you, what a fucking rotter_ —and he wearily rolled his eyes to hear Thor’s words of compassion. 

 

He stepped forward, vacillating between storming into the kitchen to make a scene—exhausting, but extremely satisfying—or heading back to the bedroom to sulk, when he heard Thor tell Tony of Loki’s part in foiling the brewing plan for another attack on Midgard. 

 

He stopped cold.

 

_Shit_. He never meant for Tony to know about that. He’d done the work he’d promised to do for Thor because it sounded like a challenging distraction, not because he had any inkling that there might be some sort of redemptive aspect to it. Redemption? _Fuck_ redemption—he’d already said he was sorry. After all, upon discovering the insurgent’s plot, he could just as easily have turned things in another direction, could have thrown his lot in with the Trondarians and had a merry old time creating another massive spree of destruction with himself as the epicenter. 

 

But, he’d had no stomach for that. There was no point. He’d learned that defeat was inevitable in any enterprise he might choose to undertake, and he knew Odin would put an end to him once and for all if he dared violate the terms of his parole.

 

Of course, that could have been a plus. Gods knew he’d thought of taking his own life more than once since being banished, and that would have certainly been a fool-proof way to go about it, but he’d lost any real passion for meeting his demise at this point. Anyway, he’d be damned if he’d allow Odin the pleasure of being the one to snuff him out. It was much more fun to frustrate the old bastard with his continued existence, no matter how miserable and hopeless it might become.

 

Which meant Midgard was important, being the only realm offering him any sort of real peace and comfort, now that Asgard was lost to him; he really didn’t want the curious planet destroyed.

 

And... there was that tiresome little itch that, infuriatingly, kept niggling away at him. Hope, he supposed it was called. And, curiosity. The remote chance that there might be something genuine happening between him and Tony Stark—something he’d never had before—and it was far too intriguing a possibility to risk missing out on. So much so that the idea of Stark being wounded in battle no longer amused him; the thought of him being killed turned his stomach.

 

And, he had no intention of letting Stark know _that_ , either. 

 

He stood with his back against the wall, his arms wrapped around himself, listening until he heard Tony depart. Then, Thor’s heavy footsteps were heading toward him and Loki remained secluded until the thunder god had just passed him, and then he said, “Thor.”

 

Thor whirled in surprise, but once he saw who it was, a huge grin crossed his face. “Brother!” he cried, grabbing Loki in one of his bone-crushing hugs, actually lifting the slighter man off the floor.

 

“Put me down, you imbecile!” Loki spat. Thor complied, and Loki irritably straightened his sweater and gave Thor a disgusted scowl. “Nice to see you, too.”

 

“How are you faring?” Thor asked, putting one hand on Loki’s shoulder and assessing him with a glance.

 

“I am perfectly well. In fact, there’s no point in your staying here today. It was very kind of you to heed Stark’s request to see after me, but I assure you, the man’s concern is unwarranted. Perhaps we could have a cup of coffee, and then you can be on your way. I’m sure you have far more pressing matters to attend to than playing nursemaid to me.”

 

Thor laughed heartily. “Friend Starkson warned me you would be obstinate. Fear not, brother, for you are blessed with the pleasure of my company for the entire day. And, I would suggest you take full advantage of it as, yes, I am quite busy and may not have another opportunity to see you for some time. But for today, I am all yours.” He cupped Loki’s cheek in one hand and gazed at him fondly. 

 

But then, he dropped his hand as a serious expression came over him, and he took a deep breath. “We have always spoken in foolish jests and mockery, but now I speak to you from the heart. I am so proud of you, Loki. Your bravery in battle, the way you kept your word—I can see the tremendous efforts you’ve made in healing your wounded mind. Perhaps it is good that we’ve spent so much time apart; but, I sorely miss having a brother, and now I only wish to mend the rift between us. I hope that is something you wish as well. Is it?”

 

A kind of blackness passed in front of Loki’s eyes, and his tongue was poised to reel off a scathingly bitter diatribe about every slight and inequity he’d suffered growing up in Thor’s shadow. But then, lessons he’d been taught during therapy came to him and soothed away the blackness like balm. He just sighed raggedly. “Gods, Thor—I don’t even know if that’s possible.” He pursed his lips, and they were both silent for a moment. Then, Loki said softly, “But, as I clearly have no other choice... for today at least, I will try.” He looked into Thor’s worried eyes and gave a half-smile. “Come, brother—have coffee with me.”

 

Thor gave him another giant grin and clapped him enthusiastically on his shoulder, almost knocking him off balance. “Coffee would be most welcome, but we shall have to consume more than that! I’ve been instructed to make sure you take in some nourishment. I understand Tony’s larder contains a number of foodstuffs, surely we can find one pleasing to your finicky palate.” 

 

Loki shrugged as they began walking toward the kitchen side by side. “I’ve yet to take breakfast here on Midgard—I’m quite open to suggestions. What do _you_ like?” 

 

“I’m fond of something called ‘Pop-Tarts.’ They are easy to prepare, requiring only an automatic heating iron called a toaster.” Once in the kitchen, they found the coffee maker just finishing a brew cycle—Tony had set it up with a timer the night before— and while Loki poured the coffee into large mugs, Thor went to  investigate Tony’s pantry, where he found a veritable treasure trove of Pop-Tarts. He chose a box of his favorite flavor, chocolate, and brought it over to the toaster. Loki looked on with interest.

 

Thor took out a package and held it up while speaking like a school teacher instructing a rather slow student. “Now, you simply remove the pastry from this paper shell, like so... and drop one into each of these slots.” Thor gave Loki a smug grin and Loki nodded approvingly. 

 

“I see. And, the heating takes place automatically, you say?”

 

Thor frowned. “Uh—no. I believe it requires the manipulation of some gizmo or other. Let’s see... Oh, yes. One simply pushes this lever in a downward direction, and—”

 

Loki couldn’t resist. Something about Thor’s imperious tone took Loki back to being eight years old and, without thinking, he sent a tiny spell to the toaster. 

 

Which immediately exploded into a small, counter-top inferno.

 

“Whoa!” Thor shouted, stumbling backwards. “Loki, what did you _do?”_

 

Loki looked horrified. “I-I didn’t mean to—”

 

“Help me!” Thor threw a tea towel over the flames, but it was quickly engulfed. Loki grabbed a fire extinguisher, pulled the pin, and sprayed the fire until it was completely out. The two men stood panting, looking at the smoking, blackened remains of the toaster, breathing in the stink of melted rubber and charred chocolate pastry.

 

Thor turned to stare at Loki. “What the _hell_ is wrong with you?” he demanded in an aggrieved tone.

 

Loki gave a huff of self-disgust. “Would that I knew, brother. This is exactly what Stark spoke to you about. I only intended to startle you with a little spark as a joke, and look what happened. You can see why I am unable to leave this place and make my way elsewhere in the world. If my _seidr_ were to accidentally harm another being, Odin would have my head in an instant, no questions asked.”

 

Thor studied Loki’s face; his eyes were wide, his forehead furrowed, and his mouth  was quirked the way it used to when, as a child, Loki was about to cry. Thor had a long history of listening to his brother talk his way out of trouble by spinning the most believable of lies, but he’d also learned to sense when he was telling the truth, and now was such a moment. His irritation faded and he shook his head slightly. “You are truly unable to control it?”

 

“I... I don’t know. I’m afraid to try. I have no desire to repay the man who has been so kind to me by burning down his house, or... demagnetizing all his credit cards, or whatever evil might befall him due to my ineptness.”

 

Thor nodded sympathetically and spoke in a gentle tone. “Let’s get this cleaned up.” They found cleaning supplies and worked together until the counter was more or less spotless. “Where’d you learn to use that fire-defeating device?” Thor suddenly asked in an admiring tone.

 

For the first time since Thor’s arrival, Loki chuckled. “Oh... I watched a televised program about fire safety yesterday, and it included a lesson on using a fire extinguisher. It also talked about other safety measures, such as what to do if one finds oneself engulfed in flames. ‘Stop, drop, and roll,’” Loki recited. “I never thought about it before, but it seemed well to pay attention, given the state of my magic. How right I was...” he muttered as an afterthought.

 

Thor grinned as he made a show of dropping the remains of the toaster into a garbage bag, holding it by it’s electric cord as if it were a dripping carcass. “Do you suppose a new toaster can be had for less than a grand?”

 

“A grand what?”

 

“Um... I believe it’s a reference to Midgardian currency.”

 

“Oh. I have no idea. But, don’t concern yourself, it was my fault. I’ll make it right with Stark somehow.” Loki smiled to himself—he was sure he could find an acceptable form of compensation to offer Tony. “What are we to do about breakfast now, though?”

 

“Oh, Pop-Tarts are very good unheated as well.” Thor opened another package and offered one to Loki. They stood together, drinking coffee and munching, each lost in fond memories of long-ago escapades they’d gotten into as youngsters.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	12. Blood and Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki appears to suffer a relapse from his injury, and Thor summons Tony out of his meeting, much to Pepper's chagrin.

Thor was close to polishing off an entire second box of Pop Tarts. He gave a last bite of a strawberry flavored pastry a begrudging glance before tossing it in the air and catching it in his mouth. “Chocolate is by far the superior flavor,” he said as he chewed.

 

Loki held up a whole one and regarded it critically. “I don’t disagree. But the strawberry frosted variety is lighter and crisper on the tongue. It also has a fruity bouquet and a delicate rose appearance. Probably more appropriate for afternoon tea, don’t you think? Perhaps served with a nice Pino Grigio on a white lace tablecloth?” 

 

Thor gave him a bewildered look, but saw a barely concealed smirk on Loki’s face,  and the thunder god realized Loki was actually joking pleasantly with him for a change. Thor burst into laughter. “Loki, you were always able to bring forth a bit of mirth for me.” His laughter faded and a rueful look came over him. “By the Nine, I’ve missed you.”

 

Loki started to make a bitter remark, but caught himself. “Well, I’ve missed you, too,” he amended. Too full to eat more, he set the Pop Tart on the counter behind him and then crossed his arms, staring at the floor.

 

Thor’s eyebrow shot up. “Damn, that almost sounded sincere.”

 

Loki glanced at him and gave his next words careful consideration. He wasn’t used to speaking from the heart, and certainly not to Thor. Still, a lot had changed. _He_ had changed. He wanted things to be different, and as skilled as he was in using words for mischief, he knew that he now needed to learn to use them for healing. “I rather think it is,” he said, sounding a bit surprised. “I miss... the time before I learned of my true nature. When we were young, when we were... just brothers. Everything made sense, back then. Now...” He sighed. “To be honest, I no longer know who I am.” 

 

Thor gave him a searching look, and then chuckled. “Silly cow. You are _Loki_. My little brother, and the Man of Iron’s friend, although I can’t imagine how that came about. But, he seems to have your best interests at heart, which is astounding, given... recent events. That must mean something to you.”

 

Loki gave a snort of amusement and nodded. “Yes, I suppose it does.”

 

Thor clapped a big hand on Loki’s shoulder. “I know things are difficult right now. But one day you will return to Asgard and be her prince. Then, things again will be as they should.”

 

“Perhaps.” A long silence followed, and then Loki raised his eyes. “But, truly, Thor—that isn’t what I want.”

 

Thor had taken Loki’s rejected Pop Tart and was about to bite into it. His eyes widened at Loki’s statement, and he exclaimed, “What! Don’t be ridiculous, of course it is. You want to come home!”

 

Loki shook his head. “I’d like to be able to visit, of course. To see Mother, and... try to repair old friendships. But, Midgard suits me, actually. I like the freedom, the incredibly low expectations. The devotion to hedonism.” He grinned. “I find that quite appealing. I think I could prosper here, if only I could find my place in this strange little world, without S.H.I.E.L.D.’s forces having me in their sights.”

 

Thor stared at him incredulously for a moment, and then something dawned on him and he nodded sagely. “Ah. That is why you have befriended Stark. He can help you.” He frowned. “The question is, what does he get from _you?”_ Thor’s ice-blue eyes felt piercing as Loki internally squirmed at the question. He shook off the feeling and gave Thor a sly smirk. 

 

“I suppose he finds me a challenge. He loves to be the hero, doesn’t he? No doubt he sees me as a project for redemption. Very misguided, but it works to my advantage, and I accept it.”

 

Thor’s expression darkened. “But, you mean him no ill—right?”

 

“I do not. He’s been incredibly kind to me. I will only take from him that which is mutually beneficial. Don’t worry, Thor. When Iron Man and I next part ways, I will leave him with only good memories. That is my vow, you can count on it.”

 

Thor chewed slowly. “I hope so. Tony is _my_ friend, too. I would hate for my own brother to be responsible for causing him more grief, after I’ve so vehemently vouched for you.”

 

“You have my word.” Loki stretched, raising his arms over his head and groaning. He wasn’t feeling 100%, but he needed to move around, to use his limbs. The energy that had flooded his system following the unfortunate toaster incident was fading, but it left him feeling antsy. “Look, let’s do something, shall we? Or would you prefer to stand there and continue eating these infernal tart-things and go into full-blown sugar shock? You know, if you pass out on the floor, I won’t be able to lift you, and Stark will come home and have a fucking heart attack. Not a very nice thing to do to someone you call your good friend.” 

 

Thor gave him an indulgent smile. “That wouldn’t happen, I’m quite accustomed to sugary treats. But, I would like to do something else. What did you have in mind?”

 

Loki thought for a moment. “I’ll give you two options; you may flounder alongside me as I swim in Stark’s gigantic indoor pool, or you may come be bested by me at Midgardian billiards. Which do you prefer?”

 

Thor’s hearty laugh pealed out in the large open kitchen. “I happen to be an excellent swimmer, but I fear the exertion of trying to keep up with me might sap what little is left of your already feeble strength. Why, Tony might think I’d abused you! So, billiards it is, if only you will assure me that, for once in your wretched life, you will not cheat.”

 

“In spite of what you tell yourself to assuage your bruised ego, I have never once cheated at a game of skill,” Loki said irritably. “I am simply better than you. At any but feats of pure animal strength, that is.”

 

Thor leaned back, regarding Loki in amusement. “Well, I shan’t bother to argue the point, I suppose. Given the display you put on in the kitchen, I’ll certainly notice if you attempt to gain an advantage with your _seidr._ Let’s play.”

 

Loki pursed his lips in annoyance. Having his magic go awry was embarrassing,  and he knew from long experience that protesting his innocence would do no good, so he just followed Thor to the game room.

 

******

 

Loki won the first game handily; Thor scowled and racked up again. Loki was well on his way to beating Thor a second time when he missed an easy shot. Thor chortled. “What’s gotten into you, Loki? Don’t tell me you’re taking pity on me. Or are you not quite so adept as your boasts would suggest?” 

 

When Loki didn’t answer and the loud “thunk” of a cue stick falling to the floor startled Thor, he turned to see his brother leaning forward, gripping the side of the pool table so tightly that his knuckles were white. His head was down, his face obscured by his hair. When Loki raised his head, Thor was shocked to see pain reverberating in his eyes.

 

“Brother, what is it?” Thor asked worriedly. He quickly came to stand beside Loki.

 

“It’s nothing,” Loki gasped. “I-I must have pulled a muscle. I... I’ll be fine.”

 

“Loki...” Thor said gently. “You don’t look well at all. Let’s go sit down.”

 

Loki gave a brittle laugh. “You’re forfeiting our game?”

 

“No, I merely wish to postpone it until you can compete properly. You look as if I could knock you over with mere breath.” Thor was careful to speak jokingly to cover the fact that he was genuinely scared by Loki’s ashen face and the way his arms shook as he supported himself. 

 

“I’m all right.” Loki took in a gulp of air and straightened. The pain had passed and  with it a rush of dizziness and nausea, but now he just felt weak. “But... I wouldn’t want to humiliate you further, so by all means, let’s go sit.” He slowly made his way to the living room and Thor followed, nervously watching to make sure he would be able to catch him if he passed out, for he surely looked as if he were close to doing so.

 

Loki made it to the couch and took a seat. Thor sat down beside him, studying his wan face. “Are you sure you’re all right? Should I call Tony?”

 

“No. I’m—” Another wave of pain came over Loki and he bent forward and clutched his stomach. An anguished cry tore out of his throat. “Oh, fuck... _Shit.”_ A second stream of curses followed as Loki futilely struggled not to let Thor see just how much his insides hurt. The blond god knelt beside him, one hand on his shoulder, trying to decide what to do.

 

“Don’t touch me!” Loki hissed.

 

“What is _wrong?”_ Thor asked in a helpless tone. “Tell me what to do and I’ll do it.”

 

The storm of pain finally faded and Loki eased himself back against the couch. “I don’t know... I don’t know. I must have... torn something at the billiard table. Fuck. I don’t dare use magic... but it hurts so badly...” And, there was something else, too, although he thought he’d rather die than mention it to Thor. He scrunched up his eyes in disgust; now that he could focus on something other than the searing pain in his belly, he realized he was humiliatingly wet between his legs. _Surely I haven’t pissed myself?_ he thought. No, it was more to the rear, where he was sitting. Loki discretely put a hand on the moist spot and brought back fingertips daubed with red. He stared for a moment. 

 

Well. It no longer mattered what Thor thought. Loki softly said,  “Thor—I’m bleeding.”

 

“Oh, fuck,” Thor rasped as he stared at his brother’s red-stained fingers. “Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck. Loki—you should lie down. Come, I’ll help you get to bed.”

 

Loki shakily stood up, and almost immediately doubled over with pain. He sank to his knees, arms across his belly. Now he could feel blood gushing out of him, soaking his jeans, hot and wet. “Thor...” he gasped, trying to form a coherent sentence. He wanted to say, “I need Tony—find Tony, please find Tony,” but even in his pain-wracked state, he knew that would sound incriminatingly wrong. Nothing else seemed to make sense, though, and the words died a confused death on his tongue.

 

“Shh, don’t try to speak.” Thor unceremoniously picked him up and carried him to Tony’s bed. He gently laid him down and went to the bathroom for a cool wet cloth which he put across Loki’s forehead. He could see red seeping into the white sheet under Loki’s hips and hastily fumbled on a shelf under the nightstand where he’d seen Tony stash the draught he’d brought when Loki was gored by the Trondarian creature. He pulled out the cork and held it to Loki’s lips. “Drink.”

 

“What is that?” Loki whispered weakly.

 

“It’s a potion Mother made for you when you were injured. It will dull the pain and give you strength. Take it.”

 

Loki opened his mouth and allowed Thor to give him the bitter medicine. He made a noise of disgust as his head flopped back on the pillow, and then he cried out and turned on his side, curling up into a ball as he dealt with another bout of pain. 

 

The blotch of red was growing larger.

 

Thor stepped back into the bathroom, not wanting Loki to hear the desperation in his voice. He took out the cell phone Jane Foster had given him, and clicked on Tony’s number.

 

******

 

It was hot and stuffy in the Stark Enterprises board room. Tony was sitting at the head of the conference table, one hand supporting his head, the other idly doodling on a pile of papers spread out in front of him. His eyes threatened to close on him and he would have been bored out of his mind, but he had managed to completely tune out the blather that was being spewed forth by his stockholders. Instead, he was thinking of Loki.

 

Loki. It had been so delicious to wake up beside him, to feel him breathing next to him. There was something about pulling him into his arms and having those amazing green eyes flutter open, knowing he’d chosen to start his day with Tony, that he was the first thing he saw. A soft smile played at Tony’s lips, but his reverie was cut short by a jab in the ribs from Pepper.

 

Tony cleared his throat and took a moment to assess whether anything worthwhile was being said; of course, he knew it wasn’t. He owned 95% of the company’s voting shares and nothing these fuckers had to say was going to convince him to do anything other than what he’d already decided to do. This was all just making nice and playing a game, that is to say, being a good boy and doing what Pepper told him, but he was done—he wanted to go home and be with Loki. 

 

Wanted to go home and take him in his arms, feel that cool skin against his. Wanted to drag him to bed and fuck him, or to just hang out with him and talk, whatever he wanted, anything that would get him to look at him _just that way_ again, and to smile and laugh and tell him he was a pathetic puling mortal, or whatever creative new insult he’d thought up for him that day. Get him to curl up against Tony and let him feel his heart beating.

 

Maybe he could persuade Loki to keep him company in the kitchen while Tony reached into some dusty corner of his mind for his mother’s spaghetti recipe. Maybe he’d persuade Loki to tell him tales of his childhood on Asgard as he chopped onions and peeled garlic, or of some fond memories he had of adventures he and Thor had experienced, back when they were young and still glad to be brothers. Maybe Loki’d even ask Tony about his own childhood, and he’d dig around in that cobwebby corner for some good memories to share, something that would make Loki laugh and make Tony not seem like quite so much of a pathetic mortal after all.

 

And then, maybe they could— 

 

Just then, Tony’s phone jangled. Pepper shot him an outraged look, might as well have said, _“Really? You couldn’t even turn off the ringer?”_ right out loud. Tony smiled placatingly until he saw who was calling. His smile faded and he stood up. “Sorry gang, gotta take this.” He didn’t really give a shit that everyone in the room was staring at his receding backside with a puzzled scowl; all he knew was that Thor wasn’t likely to call him unless there was something seriously wrong, and this was the god himself on the other end of the phone line. 

 

Not good.

 

“Yeah,” he answered, once he was in the hallway.

 

“Tony—you need to come home immediately,” Thor said in a strained voice.

 

“What’s wrong?” Tony felt panic swelling in his chest.

 

“Loki’s in tremendous pain, and he’s bleeding from his... lower end. I-I think he re-injured himself internally while playing billiards with me.”

 

 _Shit. Yeah, that, or maybe when he was lying under me this morning while I fucked him... I shouldn’t of taken him up on that offer, not yet, I knew he wasn’t ready..._ A jolt of guilt rolled through Tony’s gut, but he managed to croak, “I’ll call a doctor.”

 

“No, Tony, a Midgardian physician will be of no help. You must come home and stay with him while I go to Asgard and consult with my mother. She is a great healer; she will know what to do.”

 

“But—”

 

“Please hurry.”

 

“Okay, okay, I’m leaving now. Ten minutes, tops.”

 

They both hung up and Tony took off, calling for his car as he went. 

 

Once Pepper realized Tony was leaving, she rushed to the door and flung it open just in time to see Tony disappear into the elevator.

 

She rolled her eyes and went back to apologize and explain to the stockholders that Tony had had some sort of emergency.

 

What it could have been, she had no clue.

 

******

 

When Tony came into his bedroom, Thor was already prepared to depart. 

 

“What—”

 

“He’s resting. I gave him the draught I left with you for safekeeping. But its effects will not last long without the use of his _seidr_ —I must hurry.”

 

“Okay, go. I’ve got him.”

 

Thor strode out and soon Tony saw lightening flash. He went to the bed where Loki was breathing shallowly, his arms wrapped around himself. For all that Loki was such a tall, powerful presence, he looked small and frail under the blanket Thor had pulled over him.

 

“Hey, kiddo,” Tony said softly.

 

At the sound of Tony’s voice, a puzzled look came over Loki’s face. It couldn’t have been more than fifteen minutes since Thor called him—Tony must have walked out of his meeting, risked Pepper’s wrath to be with him. Something old and broken inside him loosened up, like an old cog given a shot of oil, and he struggled to look over his shoulder. _He came,_ he thought. _He knew I needed him and he came..._ Loki tried to smile. “Tony... I-I thought you were working.” 

 

Tony had expected an accusatory snarl for a greeting, but as weak as he was, Loki sounded genuinely pleased to see him. Encouraged, Tony carefully sat on the edge of the bed, trying not to jostle him. “Of course I did. What, you think I’d rather sit around with a bunch of dried-up old fuckers with spreadsheets when I have a gorgeous young space-god waiting for me at home?” He smiled warmly. “So, what’s the deal, sweetie? Not feeling so hot?” 

 

Loki shifted onto his back so he could look at Tony properly. Tony felt a jab of fear at the paleness of Loki’s face, and he picked up his icy-cold hand to clasp it tightly between his own, hoping to give him some of his warmth. Loki took in a breath and spoke in a low voice.

 

“I-I don’t know what’s wrong. I hurt. And, there’s blood...”

 

“Yeah, Thor told me. Well, your mom’ll be here in a jiffy. She’ll take care of you, don’t worry.”

 

Loki managed a wan smile. “My mother... is a great healer of her people, but beneath this skin, I am Jotun. She may not know what to do.”

 

“Aw, come on, how different could your insides be?” Tony said with as much cheer as he could muster. “So, maybe a couple of major organs are switched around or you’ve got an extra gall bladder or something. So what? She’ll figure it out.”

 

Tony could see a spasm of pain cross Loki’s face. When it had passed, he took a deep breath and said, “I may be dying, Tony.”

 

“Oh, fuck me. Always the drama queen, aren’t you?” Tony’s eyes crinkled in a grin and he fastened them on Loki’s, but his fake-cheer quickly faded and he tightened his grip on Loki’s hand. His voice was solemn now. “Come on, babe, don’t even say that. You’ll be okay.”

 

“No, please, listen. I need you to know. I need you to know how... sorry I am for all the evil I brought to your realm. For everything I did to cause you grief and pain. I wish—”

 

“Hey, cut it out, no way am I letting you kick off. I—”

 

“I want you to know... how much your kindness has meant to me. How much I... care for you. You brought me hope—something I haven’t had for the longest time. I thank you for that. I only wish that now, you might think well of me, if only just a little...”

 

“Shh. Damn it, you’re going to be fine! Stop this remorse shit, you’re kind of making me want to hurl.” Tony had to bite his lip to keep a sob from coming up. There was nothing he could do to force back the tears welling in his eyes.

 

Loki reached up and ran his fingers over Tony’s cheek. “Ah, well, then, forget it. I hate it when deathbed declarations bring about nausea.” They smiled at each other for a long moment and then another grimace of pain flashed over Loki’s face. “Fuck...” he gasped.

 

Tony couldn’t stand not being able to help. Casting about for _something,_ some little action, he said, “Let me look at your scar.” Tony lifted the blanket and was hit by the thick, coppery smell of blood. He looked at the red staining the white sheet and it suddenly occurred to him—Loki could be right. He _could_ lose him. Tony went into battlefield mode and tightened his jaw. He raised Loki’s shirt and examined the pale pink slash across his side. It looked fine, but of course there was no telling what was happening inside him. Tony lay his warm hand on the cold flesh and forced himself not to cry.

 

“You, uh... you’re kind of my favorite extraterrestrial, you know that?” he said, his voice thin. “I mean... I don’t really want to think about you not being around. So, don’t do that, okay?” He leaned forward to carefully hug Loki. “Stay with me, Loki. Please stay.”

 

Loki gave a soft huff. “I want to. I’m trying. Maybe you’re right. Maybe my mother will...”

 

A fierce clap of thunder shook the tower and Tony sat back, hope flooding into his chest. “Sounds like she’s here. I’ll go get her. You stay put.” He gently laid a kiss on Loki’s cold lips and then his hand as he released it. 

 

Loki nodded weakly, and Tony hurried out to meet his guests.

 

 

 


	13. A Stirring

When Tony entered the living room, he saw Thor standing beside a statuesque, golden-haired woman. She was wearing a flowing white gown and had a battered leather satchel slung over her shoulder. Tony went to greet them. He nodded at Thor and then held out his hand to the woman. She was beautiful, intimidatingly so.  “Hello,” he said, “I—”

 

“Man of Iron, I present to you the Allmother, her most Royal Highness, Queen of Asgard.” Thor held himself proudly, and there was a moment of silence in which Tony kind of didn’t know what to do; his hand was just hanging there like a dead fish. Thor frowned with an expectantly raised eyebrow, and he made a little gesture that Tony interpreted to mean he should, what? Curtsey? Genuflect? Kneel? _Something,_ obviously _._ He dropped his hand and settled for a little bow, which seemed to satisfy Thor. But the queen just scoffed. “Thor, this is hardly the time for formalities.” The queen turned to face Tony. “You’re Tony Stark, yes?” she said in a warm tone.

 

“Yes, ma’am. Uh, I mean, your Highness.”

 

“Please, call me Frigga.” She now held out _her_ hand and Tony tentatively took it, wondering if he was supposed to kiss it like he’d seen in the movies, but the regal lady simply gave it a firm shake, just as anyone would. Tony dared a glance directly at her face and she had a kind, friendly expression that immediately put him at ease. She smiled.

 

“Thor has told me much about you, and I hope we will have an opportunity to get to know one another, but right now, I must see my son. Can you take me to him?”

 

“Of course,” Tony said. “This way, your Highness, uh, ma’am.”

 

“Frigga,” the queen repeated firmly. She allowed Tony to lead her to his bedroom. 

 

“Loki? Your mom’s here,” Tony announced as they walked in. He smiled when he saw Loki’s face light up at the sight of her.

 

“Mother!”

 

“Oh, Loki, I’ve missed you so, my darling.” Frigga hurried to sit on his bedside and wrap her arms around him. Tony could see Loki weakly grab onto her. She turned and said to Tony, “Please, Mr. Stark, leave us. I need to speak to my son in private.”

 

“Yes, ma’am. Oh, and, uh... You can call me Tony.” He stood there a moment, but quickly grasped that he’d already been dismissed, as Frigga had eyes only for Loki. Reluctantly, Tony stepped out and closed the door behind him. He headed back to the living room to wait with Thor.

 

******

 

“My poor little boy.” Frigga leaned back and gave Loki a critical once-over glance; his pale, drained appearance was indeed worrying, a testament to the blood loss he’d suffered—clearly, Thor hadn’t been exaggerating. Still, he looked better than he had the time she’d seen him imprisoned in the dungeons of Asgard, battered and bruised and skinny to the point of his bones poking up beneath his flesh. At least now he looked as if he’d had regular meals and a warm place to sleep.

 

“What’s wrong with me, Mother?” Loki asked plaintively. He didn’t bother to hide the worry in his voice.

 

“Well, let’s have a look at you.” Frigga placed her hands on Loki’s face, and then on his neck, feeling his pulse. She stared into his eyes. 

 

Loki basked in the familiar touch, the look of concern. “I don’t want to die,” he said in a pitiful tone. He didn’t mind being a bit melodramatic for his mother; she generally always indulged his self-pity, but only up to a point. She seemed to know  just when to call his bluff. But now, he didn’t think he was overdoing it, asking for a bit of motherly coddling. He was sure the gravity of the situation was plain to her.

 

Frigga clucked sympathetically, but she had what Loki thought was a rather inappropriately cheery manner about her, almost a twinkle in her eye. It was most perplexing. 

 

“What a dreadful time you’ve had of it lately,” she said. “I’m so sorry. But, I’m fairly certain that you’re not going to die, my love.” 

 

Loki’s lips twisted in irritation. Couldn’t she see he was at death’s door, or at least approaching its front lawn? Although, he _was_ beginning to feel a tiny bit better... “Then, what manner of ailment is this? In case Thor didn’t fully explain the situation, I’m bleeding and in a lot of pain. Not to put too fine a point on it, but this totally sucks.”

 

Frigga chuckled. “Oh, dear, I see you’ve picked up some coarse Midgardian language, haven’t you? Well, I think I know what’s wrong, but I have to be sure. Lift your shirt, love, I need to lay hands on your belly.”

 

Loki frowned, but obeyed. Frigga spread her fingers wide apart and lay them low on either side of Loki’s flat stomach. She closed her eyes, and for a moment, Loki’s mind drifted and everything felt liquid. Then, a sharp spark of energy coursed through his entire body, leaving him gasping for air. “M-Mother! What was that?” he sputtered when he could speak.

 

Frigga sat back and gave him a wry look. “It’s just as I suspected. And, I’m afraid this _is_ going to come as a bit of a shock. But, happily, I can assure you that your demise is hardly imminent.”

 

“What _is_ it?” Loki asked anxiously.

 

“First, I have a question for you, and I want the truth, none of your artful lies,” Frigga said crisply as she fixed him with a narrow gaze. “Have you recently lain with a man?”

 

Loki’s eyes widened comically. He’d never made much of an attempt to hide his proclivities toward a rich and varied sex life from his mother, but neither was it something he felt comfortable... _discussing._ “What the hell does that have to do with anything?” he asked balefully.

 

“Answer me, please. Have you?”

 

Now Loki had the expression of a recalcitrant teenager. He crossed his arms and looked away before giving the barest of nods, and then shrugged. “So?”

 

Frigga picked up his hand and squeezed. “Well, my dear... It seems you are with child.”

 

Loki blinked, and the energy drained from the room. It was dead silent until a slow chuckle came out of him and he shook his head at her slyly. “Mother... And here I thought _I_ was the trickster. Clever, but your humor is a bit misplaced, this really isn’t funny. Please, just tell me what’s wrong.”

 

“Open your mind to me, Loki.” Frigga took Loki’s hand and placed it where one of hers had been on his stomach. She put hers on top of his and again, that liquid feeling came over him. This time, his consciousness seemed to make a connection with his body and he felt... a stirring. Sparks seemed to flow effortlessly from his hand to his brain, not an unpleasant feeling, but... strange. For a moment, time was irrelevant and there was no sound in the room but their breathing. Shuddering waves of knowledge washed over him and he finally raised his eyes to his mother’s. 

 

“Ye gods,” he whispered.

 

Frigga smiled slowly and nodded. “Yes. There’s a life growing inside you, Loki.”

 

Loki dropped his hand limply onto the bed; Frigga sat back. Loki’s eyes closed and Frigga watched his expression harden. When his eyes opened again, they were flashing fire, and when he spoke, it was from between clenched teeth. “This can _not_ be happening. I’m a _man!”_

 

“You are Jotun,” Frigga said gently.

 

It broke Frigga’s heart to see Loki’s face go from wild fury to hurt bewilderment. “Wha... _What?”_ he asked. “Why would that... What do you mean?”

 

Frigga took a deep breath and leaned down to open her satchel. She brought out a large, ancient-looking book, the worn leather cover tooled with flowers, entwined serpents and runes. She laid it open on her lap and pondered a moment before speaking. 

 

“My great-great grandfather travelled the nine realms back in the days when Asgard’s king ruled all. He spent time in each of them, learning their ways. He became a great healer and he wrote it all down.” She turned a few pages of the volume and showed Loki a series of drawings, depicting every aspect of Jotun anatomy, including the external sex organs. 

 

He stared. “I do not look like that.”

 

“I know. When Odin placed a glamour spell on you as an infant, your body became  Aesir, appearing and functioning just like any other. But when you... discovered your true heritage... When you learned to transform at will, the thin fabric of that glamour began to wear away. Oh, it will never disappear completely, you will always bear the same external appearance you have now, but inside... There was a breakdown.” 

 

Frigga bit her lip and smoothed a lock of hair away from Loki’s brow. “Somehow, when you became... intimate with a man, the seed found its way to your womb. It took root.” She smiled, wishing the fiery look in her son’s eyes would fade.

 

“Then, what is this pain? This blood?” Loki snapped harshly.

 

Frigga turned a page in the book. She pointed at one of the drawings and at the ancient runes scratched in beside it. “The Jotun body contains both male and female organs, but inside, the womb is very compressed, it’s tiny, but it does contain an egg. If it goes unfertilized for long enough, it and the organ itself will wither away. However, if a Jotun mates and receives his partner’s spend, the seed joins the egg, but typically remains dormant for some time, for weeks or even months. It stays protected in the harsh Jotun climate until the, uh, mother is in a safe and comfortable environment.

 

“At that point, the womb begins to expand and take shape. Apparently, this is a very sudden—and painful—process, taking place over a few hours. Blood flows, cleansing the passage. But then the little seedling begins to grow, and from there, the pregnancy will progress much like any other.” Frigga looked searchingly at her son. “I know this is a lot to grasp all at once, dear. But, surely, it is a blessing.”

 

Loki stared back for a long moment before snarling, “A _blessing?_ A _BLESSING?_ Are you insane? Why did you never tell me this could happen? What else do I not know about my monstrous heritage, am I to one day begin spewing lava like a volcano, develop tentacles like a squid? Tell me, Mother! _What else do I not know?”_

 

Taken aback by his fierceness, Frigga forced a crooked smile. “I think this is about it,” she said mildly.

 

 Loki rolled his eyes and lay back, exhausted from the storm of emotions he’d just experienced. Then Frigga sadly bowed her head. “We never told you because we never thought... We never thought you would discover your true form. Never thought something like this was _possible,_ with your Aesir body. Until Thor told me of what was happening with your _seidr_... It never even occurred to me. I’m so sorry, Loki, I’m so very sorry.”

 

Loki clamped his hands over his eyes, and again the room fell silent. Finally, Loki spoke, his voice low and gravelly.

 

“All right. There must be... some sort of potion... a cure for this dilemma. Yes?”

 

Frigga looked up. “You mean...?”

 

Loki nodded. “I want it out of me. _Now_. Make it go away, make it _die.”_

 

“Loki, please—”

 

“No, Mother. It’s _my_ body, I make this choice. Where can I get it? How? Tell me now, or I’ll find someone who will.”

 

When Frigga didn’t answer, Loki leaned over and roughly grabbed her arm. “I will not hesitate to cut the thing out of my belly myself. You know that I will, if it comes to that. Will you help me or not?”

 

Frigga sighed tiredly. “There is a plant that grows wild on Asgard, it’s quite easy to find... It’s a simple potion, I’ve made it often for the servant girls. According to the book, it will work on the Jotun, too. I’ll go home and make it and bring it back as soon as possible.” Her lips were pressed in a thin line and she looked gravely at her son. “If that is what you truly want.”

 

Loki dropped her arm, his eyes burning emerald smoke. “It is.” He lay back, his breath coming hard and fast.

 

Frigga’s imagined grandchild, a beautiful giggling chubby little thing with Loki’s dark hair, seemed to vanish to dust inside her mind. She pushed aside her grief; this was hardly unexpected. She didn’t blame Loki for his feelings. But, she wasn’t quite ready to give up. She had to try.

 

“Who is your mate?” she asked softly.

 

“My _what?”_

 

“The man who... The other father,” she settled. 

 

Loki laughed bitterly. “He’s not my mate.”

 

“He’s no longer in your life?”

 

“No, he’s... It’s Stark, if you must know.”

 

Frigga’s brows shot up. “I see...” She stifled a laugh. Her son had chosen well, if he was going to pick from among the mortals for someone to mate with. Tony Stark was certainly a fine specimen, if a bit on the short side. But the odds of him accepting this situation... Mortals were notoriously small-minded about the differences between themselves and other species when it came to mating. Still... "Will you tell him?"

 

A fresh wave of horror came over Loki. _Tell Stark?_ Oh, gods. How he would laugh, once he got over his revulsion. But, what would it matter. Loki never expected anything long term with the man—this would simply force things to their logical conclusion that much faster. It was fine. Once the demon was expunged from his body, his magic would return to normal and he could be on his way, just as he’d always intended. It was fine. But, he couldn’t quite bear the thought of Tony’s face when he told him, the humiliation of his mockery, the pain of his rejection...

 

“Ah, and what shall I say, dear Mother? That his seed has been hijacked by a blue-fleshed monster and his progeny will be some freakish, hapless creature, belonging to no world, despised by all? At the moment, I’d rather not.”

 

“He should know.”

 

“Then, _you_ tell him. But, not Thor. Or Odin. It’s none of their concern.”

 

Frigga nodded. “All right.” She sat quietly for a moment. “You have time, Loki. Sleep on it, you may feel differently tomorrow, and—”

 

“I won’t.”

 

“Very well.” She stood up, leaned down and kissed Loki’s forehead. “I’m so sorry. I love you. Please don’t doubt that.” She pressed a small vial into his hand. “If the pain returns, take this. But, it’s likely over with, and the bleeding too. You should begin to feel much better in a very short time.” She gently tilted Loki’s chin up, seeking his stormy gaze. “I’ll return as soon as possible with the potion. And, I’ll tell no one but Mr. Stark.” She ran her hand over his hair. “I think you underestimate him, Loki. But, it is as you say—it’s your right to make this decision. I just truly hope you will have no regrets.” She gave him another kiss and then turned and walked to the door.

 

Loki didn’t respond. He had nothing more to say. But after Frigga left the room, he lay there, unmoving, his mind swirling. Suddenly, he sat upright, raised his hand, and sent a bolt of energy hurtling toward a harmless overstuffed chair at the opposite end of the room. It was almost a reflex, just an unthinking release of pent-up tension, like slamming a door or tossing a book across the room. 

 

He only meant to throw the damn thing over on its side in a private display of pique. But the chair lifted itself into the air, turned two complete revolutions so quickly it created a little air tunnel, and then the upholstery split open and every bit of the poly-fiber filling so firmly held within spewed out, covering most of the contents of that side of the room with a blanket of white.

 

Loki stared in bewildered horror at first the scene, and then at his shaking hand.

 

The energy from somewhere deep inside his gut seemed to laugh.

 

He lay back on the pillow and wept.

 


	14. Frigga and Tony Have a Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frigga gives Tony the big news, and Tony has a hard time with it.

Frigga found her way back to the living room. She paused before entering, taking a moment to peek in and observe the two men sitting in silence at opposite ends of the couch. Thor was idly flipping through a magazine; Tony was just sitting with his elbows propped on his knees and his hands clasped together. The look on his face was one that Frigga knew well—it was the look of a man worried about his mate. She grinned a little. Poor Loki. He was so perceptive except where he, himself, was concerned. She wondered how he could have missed the obvious love and devotion the mortal man was harboring for him.

 

They both looked up when she walked into the room, and she gave them a reassuring smile.

 

“How does he fare, Mother?” Thor asked anxiously.

 

Tony opened his mouth, but nothing came out.

 

“He’s going to be fine,” Frigga said firmly. Thor’s face transformed into a golden visage of joy and he jumped up and threw his arms around her, but Tony looked like a balloon stuck by a pin as he sat back, slumped in relief. “He’s exhausted and needs rest and quiet, but he should be back on his feet by the morrow,” Frigga continued around Thor’s shoulder.

 

“What was wrong? What happened to him?” Tony managed to ask.

 

“It seems he’s suffering the after effects of a recent... event,” Frigga explained diplomatically. “But, the worst is over, I’m certain.”

 

“Praise the gods!” Thor said happily. “May I go see him?”

 

“He’s probably asleep. He needs rest. Let’s wait a bit, all right?” Thor looked disappointed, and Frigga reached up and cupped his chin. “My son, this ordeal has left me drained. Do you think you could manage a cup of tea for me? You know how I like it.”

 

“Of course!” Thor gave his mother one more massive hug, leaving her tottering, and he hurried off toward the kitchen.

 

“Tea’s behind the Pop Tarts, Point Break,” Tony called after him.

 

“I know! By the way, you might wish to replenish your supply of that delicious pastry...”

 

Frigga waited until Thor was out of earshot and then turned to Tony. “Mr. Stark, is there a chamber where we could be assured of privacy? I need to speak with you.”

 

Uh-oh. Frigga definitely looked as if she had something to say that Tony didn’t want to hear. Plus, he knew his being ignorant of Asgardian etiquette meant he might accidentally offend the Allmother, which was probably a worse diplomatic offense than being culturally insensitive toward a foreign business associate, what with the zapping and the magic and all... Tony felt the tension return to his gut.

 

He led Frigga to what he laughingly called his office, or what Pepper referred to as “Tony’s man purse,” the place he stuck everything he didn’t want to deal with at any given moment. He brought his guest inside, closed and locked the door, and then cleared away piles of papers and debris from a small couch. “Sorry about the mess. Let’s sit, huh?”

 

“Thank you.” Frigga glided in and seated herself on the couch, and Tony pulled up a chair. He wasn’t sure what the protocol of sitting next to an extraterrestrial member of royalty might be, but he was willing to bet sharing a love seat uninvited wasn’t it. 

 

Frigga drew herself up, looking reserved but kind. “Mr. Stark—”

 

“Tony, please.”

 

“Tony. First, I want you to know how profoundly grateful I am for everything you’ve done for Loki. I can’t thank you enough for helping my son, particularly after he suffered such a grievous injury.”

 

Tony felt a bit of relief. Maybe Her Royal Alienness was just going to offer him an outer-space knighthood or something; he could roll with that. “Aw, I was glad to do it. I mean, he’s Thor’s brother, and now we’ve gotten to be pretty good friends ourselves. He was in a bad situation, plus it turns out he kind of saved my planet for a change, so you know—quid pro quo and all that.”

 

Frigga was looking at him with an indulgent smile. She nodded. “Yes. Well, he’s indeed fortunate to have a friend like you here on Midgard.”

 

Tony gave a self-deprecating shrug. “Yeah, it was the right thing to do.”

 

“Mm.” A delicate blonde eyebrow was raised. “In fact, according to Loki, your relationship extends a bit beyond friendship. Yes?”

 

Tony’s eyes widened. “Huh?”

 

Frigga now had an impish smirk. “I understand the two of you have become... quite close.”

 

Tony wasn’t an idiot. Well, he was, but not about discerning the hidden meaning behind a term like “quite close,” when it came to describing his relationship with the hot alien space-god.  But he was damned if he was going to be lured into admitting that he’d been boning the guy to the guy’s _mother._ He didn’t know how things went on Asgard, but he for one didn’t consider that at all proper. So, he played dumb. “Oh! Sure, of course. We like a lot of the same things, football, pizza, movies, stuff like that.” Tony felt sweat pooling under his armpits.

 

Frigga didn’t say anything, just continued to regard him with amused benevolence.

 

Tony squirmed. He cleared his throat, and snuck a glance at her, wishing she would get to whatever point she was going to make. It seemed hours, but finally, Frigga decided to let him off the hook. “You love him,” she said gently. 

 

Thereby impaling him on an even bigger, pointier hook.

 

Hearing the words shocked Tony into silence. He just stared at her open-mouthed, and Frigga laughed apologetically.

“I’m sorry. Please forgive me for being so brash, I can see you haven’t quite come to terms with your affection for him. And, I’m afraid he’s just the same.” Frigga’s humor faded and she took a deep breath. “I wish things could unfold naturally between you two, but I have only a limited amount of time here on Midgard—I came surreptitiously, to avoid upsetting my husband—and while I hate to play the meddling mother-in-law, I feel it’s necessary under the circumstances. Loki has never been good at trusting people, understandably. He also isn’t one to acknowledge weakness within himself, no matter how justified.”

 

She paused to study Tony’s expression, wondering if she was just bewildering the poor man needlessly. 

 

For his part, Tony had given up trying to read the lady and was simply sitting in a cornered animal pose, feebly attempting to gather what was left of his depleted mental defenses. He felt as if he were going to either scream or burst out crying if he got any more bad news, and he could sense that Frigga was about to lay a doozie on him.

 

Frigga forged ahead. “There’s something I need to tell you, but before I do, please understand—Loki will soon need your love and care more than ever, but it will be up to you to offer it to him. He’ll never ask. Are you willing to do that?”

 

Tony forced a placid expression onto his face. “Huh, that sounds exactly like him,” he said with as much bravado as he could muster. “And of course, I’ll do what I can. I promise. But I can’t stand the suspense much longer—what’s going on with Loki?”

 

Frigga’s voice was soft. “Has he revealed his Jotun form to you yet?”

 

“Uh... you mean the going all blue and red-eyed thing? Yeah, he has.” Tony was beginning to feel a tendril of hope snake around in his mind; if that was all she had to tell him, he was home free.

 

“What do you think of that?”

 

“It’s cool. I mean, it’s weird and freaky and would take a little getting used to if it happened a lot, but it’s not a bad thing. What, is he going to, you know, be blue all the time now or something? 'Cause, that’ll make going out to dinner a little challenging. It’s okay, we’ll just order in until I figure something out...”

 

Frigga impatiently waved a hand, thinking to herself, _Honestly, Tony Stark is such a typical male. No appreciation for subtlety._ “No, no, not at all. Loki will always maintain the outward appearance you are accustomed to, unless he chooses to do otherwise. No, what I am trying to say is that there are... other noteworthy features of the Jotun anatomy which only they possess.”

 

“Riiight,” Tony said. “Like the cold skin? That _totally_ freaked me out the first time we, uh... Sorry, never mind.”

 

Frigga narrowly avoided rolling her eyes. “Well, yes... That is one thing. But there is another—the thing I am in fact attempting to explain to you—which is not so apparent. And, it is rather... startling.” Frigga waited, giving Tony a second to prepare himself, but he seemed utterly unconcerned and was now actually worrying at a hangnail. When he realized Frigga had stopped speaking, he looked up and smiled.

 

“Oh, go ahead, I’m listening.”

 

“Good. Because what I am trying to tell you is that the Jotun are intersexual.”

 

Tony froze. Then he lowered his hand and slowly turned to face Frigga, his face screwed up in a grimace of sheer incomprehension. “Excuse me?”

 

“Tony—the Jotun have the reproductive organs of not just one gender, but... both.” Frigga let her words hang in the air a moment. 

 

“I’m sorry?”

 

“Male and female, Tony. Internally, physiologically, Loki is both.”

 

Tony sat back and absorbed that information before speaking. Without meaning to, he managed to sound a bit condescending. “Uh... Okay. Not to be crude, but I’m pretty sure that’s the kind of thing I would have noticed. I mean, I’ve looked him over pretty thoroughly, and—”

 

“I’m sure you have,” Frigga said dryly. “And, because of the spell cast upon him by the Allfather, his outward features look as any other man’s would. And, indeed, until his encounter with the Tesseract, I believe his body _was_ like any other. But as he learned to shift between forms, the hard edge of the spell weakened. Something slipped through,” she added meaningfully.

 

Tony was now staring at Frigga’s face. She looked somber, and her previous light tone was completely gone. Something in what she was saying niggled at him; it didn’t make sense, but he could feel that it was important.

 

Life-changing, maybe.

 

“Frigga,” he said softly. “Please. I don’t understand what you’re getting at. You said Loki was fine, that he’s going to be okay. But now you’re telling me there’s some weird sex thing. I don’t care about that, I’d take him any way he was, I just want him to be all right... Is he going to be all right?”

 

Frigga looked up and met Tony’s eyes. “Yes. But what I am trying to make you understand is that... Oh, gods. Loki really should be the one to say this to you, but he...” She drew in a deep breath and then said simply, “Loki is with child. Your child, Tony.”

 

Silence fell over the room like a wool blanket, thick and heavy. Slowly, Tony grinned. 

 

“Oh, brother. _Wow._ Now I see where he gets it, damn little trickster—or did he put you up to this? If he did, I’m gonna kill him, just so you know. Daaaamn, you really had me going there...” Tony chuckled and Frigga sighed.

 

“I can only imagine how difficult this is for you to grasp. I understand; here in Midgard, this is an utter impossibility. But Loki is Jotun, and it is the way of their race.”

 

“Sure, sure. Man, you two must have kept ol’ Odin hopping, right? Haha, good one. I—”

 

“It’s not a joke.”

 

“Yeah, right...” Tony glanced at her, expecting a gleam of mischief to be reflected back at him. But Frigga was dead serious.

 

She held out her hand. “Tony, will you allow me to help you to understand?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Please, come over here. Sit beside me.”

 

“O...kay.” When Tony had settled in, Frigga took both of his hands in hers. 

 

“Please, trust me. This will feel strange, but it’s neither painful nor harmful to your Midgardian constitution. Just relax.”

 

Tony eyed her warily. “What are you going to do?”

 

“Close your eyes and listen.”

 

Tony obeyed, expecting Frigga’s soothing voice to continue. But, she didn’t speak. Instead, for a long moment, there was nothing.

 

Literally nothing.

 

Tony felt as if he were in a sensory deprivation chamber, with no sounds in the room, nothing to see but blackness, his sense of touch registering only the warmth of Frigga’s hands. But, slowly, his mind seemed to latch onto something, some sort of energy force, and he felt a drop in the pit of his stomach as though he were tipping over the peak of a steep roller coaster. He felt himself jerk, attempting to avoid the fall.

 

“Don’t fight me, Tony,” Frigga said from somewhere in his mind. “Let me show you. Don’t be afraid.” Tony’s mind settled and a soft white light illuminated his thoughts. It shimmered and slowly took shape, and now he was with Loki. “Put your hands on his belly,” Frigga directed. “Touch. Can you feel the energy within his form?” Tony did as instructed and he felt the cool surface of Loki’s bare skin. Suddenly, he was plunged into an endless sea with electricity sparking all around him. He gasped out loud.

 

“There, Tony,” Frigga said. “There. That is your child, alive and growing inside your love. Do you doubt its existence now?”

 

“No,” Tony said, a great sob welling up in his throat. “No, I feel it, I feel it...”

 

Abruptly, the connection was broken and Frigga dropped his hands. They both sat there for a while, breathing heavily, Tony’s mind frantically grasping for something solid to ground itself with. Then he heard Frigga’s voice, and he came back to himself.

 

“It’s all right, Tony. We’re back. You’re all right.”

 

Tony opened his eyes and saw Frigga looking sympathetically at him. He felt tears running down his cheeks, and he wiped them away, amazed to find that they were real.

 

He felt like he’d just popped out of the rabbit hole.

 

“Shit!” he exclaimed. “Shit, what the hell was that? What did—what did you do? _How?_ I—”

 

Frigga patted his shoulder. “I know. It feels strange to me, too. But, I know of no other way to convince you of the truth, and you need to know.”

 

Tony nodded slightly. “Okay,” he said weakly.  “Okay, so I’m going to be a daddy. Kind of didn’t see that one coming— _ever_ —but, yeah. Okay. I can deal with this, hey, there’s a guest room adjacent to the master bedroom, I can knock out a wall and turn it into a nursery. Pep’s great at decorating, we’ll do something non-gender-specific, bunnies maybe, I like bunnies, and—”

 

“Tony.” Frigga’s voice had a warning tone to it. “Stop. Listen to me. Loki does not intend to go through with the pregnancy.”

 

Tony gaped at her, his mind reeling in a sharp U-turn. _What the HELL? That selfish, cowardly little fucker! How could he make a decision like that without even talking to me first? This is my kid too! And he lets his mother do the dirty work? This is bullshit! I..._ Anger and disappointment roiled in Tony’s heart and he snarled, _“What?_ He... Why did you bother to tell me, then? What’s the point, if he’s just going to kill it?”

 

It was odd, but Frigga looked ashamed. “I... I’m afraid my motives are in good part self-serving. I have hopes that you might be able to talk him out of it. But, even if not, he will need you to see him through it. He will struggle and he will hate himself even more than he already does. He needs you, Tony. Are you able to be there for him? No matter what his choice?”

 

Tony frowned, his anger diffusing as he tried to put himself in Loki’s place. Okay. He hadn’t been expecting this any more than Tony had. Has to be weird, being a guy all your life and then being told you’re knocked up. Poor kid, he must be in shock. Probably not thinking straight, probably scared... Tony had a sudden urge to run to him, but he took a deep breath and turned his attention back to Frigga. “Well, yeah. But, why does he want to kill it?” he asked in bewilderment. “I mean, right, kind of a big deal having a kid and all that, but he has me. Why doesn’t he want it?”

 

Frigga smiled ruefully. “First, I don’t believe he _knows_ that he has you, yet. As for the child, he fears for its future. And, he’s right. A half-Jotun infant will undoubtedly have a strange appearance. It would be difficult to find acceptance in any of the realms other than Jotunheim, and there... Well, there, it certainly would meet a harsh fate. Loki himself could never go there to raise a child, even if he wanted to. And you, yourself, can attest to how well such a child would be received in Midgard.” 

 

“But, what about Asgard?” Tony didn’t even want to contemplate Loki going off to his home planet, especially with their kid, but... if that’s what it took... they’d work it out. Tony squared his shoulders as he reluctantly finished his thought. “I know Loki can’t go there right now, but one day, maybe—couldn’t your husband do the spell on the kid? You know, make it look like... an Asgardian?”

 

A flash of pain went through Frigga’s eyes. “It’s... unlikely. Odin has had reason to regret bringing Loki from Jotunheim in the first place. I’m afraid he would reject the child out right. And, he will give no quarter to Loki, and Loki is unfortunately far too disposed to getting into trouble to think he can get through probation without giving the Allfather an excuse to extend his banishment. In truth, I suspect Odin would just as soon Loki never returned.”

 

Tony was staring straight ahead, glassy-eyed. “Wow. My mind is officially blown. How does a father treat his kid like that?” Well, Tony knew. It was a rhetorical question and probably really insulting, but he couldn’t contain his disgust for this Odin guy.

 

Frigga dropped her gaze to the floor. “It’s complicated.”

 

“Yeah, I know all about complicated.” After a long silence, he gave Frigga a helpless look. “So, what do I do now?”

 

“Go talk to him, dear. Listen to him, try to understand. From what Thor tells me, you’re a hero.” A soft smile came over Frigga and she put a hand on Tony’s. “Be Loki’s hero. Help him through this, no matter what course he’s chosen. Can you do that?”

 

Tony nodded, reflecting. “I got a feeling I’m gonna need a better suit.”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Nothing. Okay, I’m going to go see the father of my child, a phrase I never thought I’d say.”

 

Frigga reached for her satchel. “And, I must go find Thor. It’s time we left. I’ll return soon with a potion to... take care of the matter, as Loki wishes. If he changes his mind...” Frigga gave a wistful look. “Well. Anyway, it was nice meeting you, Tony. Please don’t give up on Loki. He’s trying so hard to change. I think you make it easier for him.”

 

“I’m right there with him, Your High—Frigga.” Tony pursed his lips thoughtfully. “You’re right, you know.”

 

“About what?”

 

“I... love him.” Tony chuckled. “Guess I ought to tell him that, huh?”

 

“It couldn’t hurt.” 

 

A tap came at the door. “Mother?” called Thor. “Your tea is getting cold!”

 

Tony unlocked the door and Frigga stepped out. “It’s all right, dear, I think I’ll skip it. We should go back now.”

 

“Oh. Very well.” Thor looked slightly bewildered. “Is everything all right?”

 

“Yeah, it’s great,” Tony said, trying not to sound sarcastic. “You two have a safe trip. Oh, and Thor—remember you said you had some documents about what Loki did on Trondheim?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Could you bring those with you next time you come to Midgard?”

 

“Certainly, I’ll be glad to.” Thor beamed at Tony, but then he frowned. “May I say goodbye to Loki?”

 

“Let him rest, love.” Frigga said. “You’ll be back soon, I’m sure. Jane will miss you if you’re gone too long.” She gave him a playful wink and then they headed up to the roof of Stark Tower.

 

Tony heard a clap of thunder and the building shook for a moment, leaving the air feeling super-charged.

 

Tony took a deep breath and went to talk to Loki.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry not to get to Tony and Loki's conversation, but I wanted to start the next chapter with that and this one went long. Should get the next one done this week.


	15. What Loki Wants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Loki talk.

Loki lay in Tony's bed, fighting to control the harsh sobs that made his throat hurt. He hated crying, dreaded having Tony, or, worse, _Thor,_ walk in and see him in such a contemptible state, but it was useless; the sobs came anyway. He finally gave up and let the tears fall, let them wash out all the muck and debris left behind by the fear and pain he'd recently endured.

Eventually, he was left drawing in shaky breaths, feeling weak and uncentered. He tried to _think_ , to pull himself together, but too many thoughts were pinging off one another in his tired mind. He couldn't form a single coherent thread that would stand up to logic.

And, Loki hated that, too.

One word kept swirling around in the mix: _pregnant._ A ridiculous word, a woman's word, one he'd certainly never thought of as having anything to do with him. Even in the days before he'd known his true nature, whenever he'd lain with a woman, he'd been careful to ward his seed from attachment. He didn't want to leave behind a part of himself unbidden, to suffer who knew what sort of fate.

Although, when he was a very young man, he'd had a vague notion of becoming a father someday. He'd even thought he might be a good one. He liked kids, liked their utter delight in the world, and he had a patient and understanding disposition toward them. He'd never admit it to himself, but the promise of a pure love, of being awarded unquestioning trust, of caring for someone without reserve, made his heart ache with longing.

But once he'd learned what he really was— _frost giant_ —that sweet, modest hope was extinguished like a flame doused by a bucket of filthy bilge water.

He thought of the life starting within him and the tears began anew. Somewhere in Tony's abode was a photographic image of a little boy of no more than two or three years, with a halo of curly dark hair and a pair of the brightest brown eyes Loki had ever seen. _Tony as a child,_ he thought fondly. He would be grateful to have a child such as that. But, no, his progeny would be nothing but demons, garbled amalgamations of monster and whatever weak, lesser being he'd chosen to copulate with. In this case, a human.

He wouldn't wish that on anybody.

He lay there limply, pondering how pleasant it would be to just fall asleep and never wake up. But, after a while, he managed to shake off the haze and look down at himself.

Oh, lovely.

Lying in a blood-soaked bed, sweaty, hair tangled, face lined with drying tears—he grimaced in disgust. " _Stop this,"_ he thought. _"Stupid fool, wallowing in self-pity. And for what? You have no problem. The pain is gone. The bleeding's stopped, strength is returning. Mother will bring the potion, and once the... situation has been taken care of, my_ seidr _will return to normal, and then I can do what I want. Nothing whatsoever to cry about; everything will be_ fine."

Thus encouraged, Loki carefully swung his legs over and sat up on the edge of the bed. His shirt was soaked through with sweat and the air chilled him, but it was bracing after the soporific effects of being covered up in bed, and that was good. He shakily stood up and after a rush of dizziness cleared, he felt well enough to venture off to the bathroom to take a shower.

He let the water flow over him, filling the bath chamber with its good heat and steam. He soaped up and concentrated on washing, pushing confusing thoughts aside and staying focused. When he was clean and refreshed, he stepped out and wrapped a towel around himself, and then dried his hair.

He went to find the clothes Tony had bought for him, but looking at them, he frowned. His stomach already felt swollen, although it was not visibly so. Probably just the idea of having a mongrel creature greedily expanding into the space inside his belly made him feel that way, but even so, he couldn't bear the thought of pulling on snug-fitting trousers.

He went to Tony's dresser and found the freshly washed Hello Kitty sleep pants he'd been given and put them on. He dug around and found one of Tony's precious band t-shirts; it featured an absurd, hairy quintet of wild-looking men on the front, and Loki grinned as he pulled it out of the drawer. Tony might not like him wearing it, but if he ended up being summarily dismissed from Tony's home, at least he'd have a memento of him to keep. Assuming he didn't have the presence of mind to demand it back on the spot.

He had just slipped it on when a knock came at the door. "Loki? Okay if I come in?" Tony asked.

"Yes?" Loki answered uncertainly. Gods. He wasn't ready to see Tony yet. He hadn't put words together to throw back in his face for when he laughed at him, hadn't come up with cruel insults to sear him with when he scorned and derided Loki for being _argr_...

And then a horrible thought came to him— _what if Stark was kind and apologetic as he threw him out?_ How could Loki ever convince himself that he hated the man if he was kind? How could he—

His fretting was cut short when Tony opened the door and stepped inside. He looked first at Loki, but his eye was caught by the polyester fiber coving much of room's surfaces, and he gave a low whistle as he took it in. "Wow. Nice job. But... what did that chair ever do to you?"

Loki glanced behind him and acknowledged the mess with a nod. "Yes. I'm sorry about that, it was an accident. Bit of _seidr_ gone wrong, like with the toaster."

Tony raised an eyebrow. "The toaster?"

"Mm, yes, Thor and I... Never mind, I'll explain later. Don't worry, I'll make it right. How much is a grand?"

"Huh?"

"I intend to compensate you for all the damage, once my magic is back to normal. How much?"

"Oh. No, it's okay. Toasters don't cost much, and the chair... Well, it was just a chair. An insanely comfortable chair, but...

"I promise I'll make it up to you." Loki folded his arms and dropped his gaze to the floor, and Tony approached him slowly, glad to see he was apparently feeling better. They stood within a few feet of each other, not speaking, and then Loki slowly looked up. "So?"

"So... what?"

Loki rolled his eyes, unable to bear the tension a moment longer. "So, why are you here, Stark?" When Tony didn't answer immediately, Loki's eyes narrowed and he spoke in a sardonic tone. "Ah. Come to have a bit of fun at my expense? I'm sure the situation is about as hilarious as they come here on Midgard. How nice it must be to see my arrogance so fittingly rewarded. Well, go ahead—tell me what you think of me now. I'm not a man, obviously. But, not a woman either, so, what—a freak? What's that you always call me—space alien? Very apt. Or maybe now you can finally say it, eh? The real name you have for me?" Loki's eyes glittered as he hissed, "' _Monster...'"_

Loki's fists were balled up, every muscle taut. "How disagreeable it must be, having me here; a reminder of just how low you've sunk, lying with such a creature. Must be hard on the famous Stark ego, eh? We can't have that—you must want me out of here, don't you?" Loki advanced toward him, his lip curled in a caustic snarl and his voice dropped to a low, silky tone. "Oh, you do. You do, don't you? _Don't you?"_

Tony hadn't even attempted to come up with a script for what he wanted to say to Loki. He'd sort of envisioned coming into the room, wrapping Loki in his arms, dealing with a bit of sobbing and listening to some fluttery "Whatever shall I do?" types of comments, and then having the manly, comforting, in-control words magically flow out of him, like they always did when he was in a jam.

Now, faced with this emerald-eyed demon that looked like he was about to eviscerate him, he couldn't come up with _anything_. He really wanted to stop the torrent of bitterness that Loki was spewing out at him, but nada, nothing, not one word came to mind.

So, he just stood there blinking.

And, unfortunately, Loki took his silence as agreement. "Ha! I knew it!" he said with an insane chortle. "Why don't you come right out and say it? Say it, Stark. I want you to. Tell me to get _out._ Tell me _now,_ you cowardly mortal buffoon, I want to hear the words so I can treasure them, soothe myself with them as I fall asleep at night, cherish this _proof_ of my weakness, my idiocy in trusting you, in trusting _anyone—"_ He raised a fist and lunged at Tony.

Somewhere in the back of Tony's mind came the thought, "Get the suit, dumb-ass," but he didn't pay attention. He just leaned in, blocked Loki's punch and grabbed his arm, twisting it back as carefully as he could, given that Loki clearly intended to use it to dislocate his jaw prior to going the evisceration route, and then he managed to yank him off-balance from his still-wobbly legs. When Loki fell forward, Tony pulled him to him and _hugged_ him, hugged the little fucker tight, hugged the living _shit_ out of him, plastering himself to the lithe body so firmly that Loki was basically stunned.

"Wh-what are you doing?" he asked, sounding in equal parts frustrated and bewildered.

"I'm hugging you, you dick-head. It's what people do when someone they love is upset. Even if that someone is in that uber-annoying, about-to-murder-his-boyfriend frame of mind."

Loki felt most of the fight shudder out of him and he curled himself into Tony, clinging to him as he buried his face in the crook of Tony's neck. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry," he whispered.

Tony held him, murmuring gentle words like "It's okay," and "I've got you," and "You're not going anywhere," and "Sh-sh-sh, don't you even fucking _think_ about leaving me," until they were rocking back and forth together in a comforting rhythm.

Once Loki's violent energy had stilled, Tony pulled back and took his face in his hands. "Okay, are we good?"

Loki nodded.

"Not gonna zap me into the next county or explode me like the seat cushions?"

Loki shook his head.

"All right. Then, how about you listen to what I have to say without trying to put words in my mouth, hm?"

Again, Loki nodded.

"Okay. First of all, I want to thank you for proving once again what an asshole you think I am."

" _What?"_

"You really think that this..." Tony gestured at Loki's stomach. "...makes me want to get rid of you?"

"Well, why wouldn't it?" Loki asked sulkily. "I'm a freak."

"No, you're not. You are what you are, and that's just different from what either of us is used to. So, we have to _get_ used to it. And, we will. It's like learning a foreign language, or being allergic to peanuts—we just have to think about things in a different way. Like, for example, in the future, when we fuck? We use condoms. Which are cheap, and easy to find, I mean, they sell 'em at Walgreens. So, no biggie."

Loki looked at him balefully.

"And, two, your mom explained everything to me. She told me you don't want to have the kid, and she told me why. Which is fine. Your body, your decision, but... do you even give one tiny little fuck what I think?"

"No."

"Ah. Well, okay, then."

Loki suddenly took a great interest in the examining the floor, and Tony watched him struggle not to sneak a look at Tony's face. But, he finally did, and their eyes met, and after stubbornly holding each other's gaze in dour expressions of dead seriousness, Loki cracked. A tiny smile tugged at the corner of his mouth, and then they both burst out laughing. Loki put himself back in Tony's arms and they just held each other for a long, long time. Then, Loki pulled back and sighed.

"I _do_ care what you think. Tell me."

"I'm glad you asked, I was about to burst. For your information, I think we could work things out. We could go somewhere. Leave the U.S., live in, I don't know, Russia or Alaska, someplace cold—"

"Alaska's in the U.S."

"What, you been studying for your citizenship test? Anyway, I'm a fucking billionaire, I can make things happen." He pushed a strand of hair away from Loki's face. "We'd figure it out. The kid would have a good life—I promise."

Loki closed his eyes and tiredly drew in a breath. "I find that hard to imagine. But, it doesn't matter. I don't _want_ it. I'm not interested in being a parent. Or... in a full-time relationship, if that's what you're suggesting."

Tony felt a bit like Loki'd managed to punch him in the face anyway. But, okay. So he'd been way off-base about where this thing between them had been going. Fine. Re-calibrate...

"So, what _do_ you want?"

Loki bit his lip and gave a hesitant shrug. "I enjoyed helping Thor with Trondheim, in spite of the fact that things went somewhat awry. When he becomes king, he'll need a lot more of that kind of intervention in the various realms. I can do that, I can be useful. And, as you know very well, that sort of work can be dangerous." He pursed his lips a moment. "If I'm to do a good job, I can't be burdened with worrying over a child. Or, anyone else for that matter."

Tony nodded. "Oh, I see. So, you'll go off galavanting through the universe, and just pop in here for a little roll in the hay once in a while, is that it?"

"I thought it might be, yes. Since condoms are so inexpensive and plentiful."

Tony chuckled, eyes flashing darkly. "I don't think so, gorgeous. I mean, I understand wanting to do good work. I even understand wanting to do dangerous work..." He tapped the arc reactor on his chest. "But, I can't do casual with you." He pulled Loki down for a deep kiss. "Let me make something crystal clear. I want you in my life _all the time._ I'll never tell you not to go, or even pull a guilt trip on you when you do. But, I want to know when and where you're going, and I want to know that you intend to come back to me as quickly as possible, even if it's going to be a while. I want to know that... your home is here, or wherever we decide to live. And I want to know that you love me. _If_ you do." He stared into Loki's eyes. "Do you?"

Loki felt something surge in his chest, and he smiled. "Yes, you stupid man. Yes, I love you. But—"

"Hey, hey, hey, there're a million 'but's,' and I promise, we'll work through every one of them. _But_ , let me have this for a second—you just said you loved me. And, I love you. That's pretty uncomplicated, isn't it?"

"I suppose."

Tony noticed that Loki's lower lip was trembling. "You gonna cry?" he asked teasingly.

"I'm highly hormonal, so there's a strong possibility."

"Good. Because, I hate doing stuff like that by myself." He made a show of sniffing and wiping away invisible tears.

That made Loki laugh, and they embraced again. Then Loki stepped back and squared his shoulders, his jaw tight. "And, you really believe you'll continue to feel this way even after the pregnancy is... terminated. You won't look at me with hatred, won't be sickened by me, by what I chose to do?"

Tony ran a hand down Loki's face. "I'll be sad."

Loki's expression softened. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I told you how I feel, but I respect your decision. And, I'll be here every step of the way. We'll get through it together. I-I just want us to be together."

_Together..._ A beautiful word, a perfect word, one Loki had long thought would never again have anything to do with him. He nodded, feeling the heaviness in his chest fizzle away. "All right. Once my _seidr_ is back to normal, I'll offer my assistance to my brother. But... This is my vow: I'll come home to you, Tony. I'll return to you every time, as long as you want me. This I promise." He raised an eyebrow mischievously. "I'll leave it to you to figure out the numerous 'but's' that come to mind."

Tony wanted to say something, but again he couldn't put words together, for a very different reason. This time, when he swiped at a tear, it was for real.

 **********

Meanwhile, at a hidden land base known as S.H.I.E.L.D. Central, located somewhere underground in New York City, a low level young agent sat in front of a video monitor that looked similar to a radar detection device. He'd already had one blip that morning, and now, a few hours later, there was another. He hastily sent a text.

Almost instantly, Agent Phil Coulson appeared beside him. "What do you have?" he asked softly.

"Another one, and this one's even stronger," the young man replied.

"Were you able to establish coordinates this time?" Coulson asked.

"I think so... Yes. Let me just put this into a GPS program, and—oh."

"What is is?"

"It appears to be coming from Stark Tower, sir."

_I knew it,_ Coulson thought.

Three blips in under three days. It had to be...

Loki.

Coulson smiled as he pressed the "talk" button on his comm device.

"Yes, sir?" a female voice responded.

"Have the team report to the helipad, Agent Hill. Code Green Eyes, repeat, Code Green Eyes."

"On it, sir."

A short time later, a chopper was on its way to Stark Tower.

 


	16. Nick Fury Has a Few Questions

One of the things Tony found interesting about the whole Loki situation was that, up to that point, there hadn’t been too many times in his life when the future had been laid out so clearly before him. Oh, doing what he’d had to do to save the planet had been pretty obvious. But that had been a kind of terrible-scary-nauseating type thing. What he had now with Loki was... good. Nice. _Fantastic-triple-awesome-perfect,_ actually. 

 

Loki loved him. Wanted to be with him. Was willing to work with him on figuring out how they could have a life together while still pursuing the careers they’d chosen. It kind of made Tony want to dance around while chortling giddily, not that he ever would. But—Loki _loved_ him!

 

And, yeah, maybe the whole almost-but-not-quite-having-a-baby thing wasn’t so great.

 

But, as he pulled Loki into the one not-destroyed comfy chair still left in the room, tucking his lanky limbs in beside him and helping himself to a greedy, unfettered kiss, he knew he’d already accepted it. He understood Loki’s point of view, understood that it was probably for the best. 

 

Still...

 

Tony nuzzled into Loki’s neck, liking how his hair felt, thick and silky next to his cheek. He breathed him in, determined to memorize everything about him, noting with a smile how, when he wasn’t mad or irritated or snarky, he could be so almost-soft, so easy to find a rhythm with, fitting him against himself like a humerus into a rotator cuff. 

 

He slipped warm fingers under Loki’s t-shirt and gently stroked low over his stomach, looking for the spot Frigga had shown him. He didn’t feel anything unusual, just the smoothness of Loki’s cool skin, but the memory of that electric sea had stayed with him. _Within_ him. It was weird; he didn’t know how long it would take Frigga to come back with the potion, but until she did, it was like they were a real little family, sitting there together, completing a circle. For a moment, it was as if he _was_ a dad, even if he’d never get to meet the kiddo, never get to see it or hold it...

 

Loki lay his hand over Tony’s. “Having second thoughts already?” he asked, not unkindly.

 

“No. Really, no. I just...” Tony caught himself before his voice cracked. “It’s just weird, that’s all. I mean, up until a few hours ago I’d never seriously thought for one minute about being a dad. Didn’t want to be one, didn’t think I ever would.” He tapped the arc reactor. “Not fair to a kid, you know? Too many variables. But then, this happened—” He rubbed Loki’s tummy. “And, now, I don’t know... Something inside me kind of woke up... All this love... for something that barely even exists...” Tony was aware that a tear had slipped out of the corner of his eye and was sliding down his cheek. He angrily brushed it away. “Sorry. I’m sorry, I’m not trying to make you change your mind, honest. I’m just... telling you how it is for me.”

 

“I understand.” Loki was looking at him with a grave expression. “I must confess, I’ve had similar feelings. But, that’s the wonder of having a mind capable of reasoning, of weighing risk against reward. I truly believe in my decision, Tony. But, it comes with sadness for me, too.” Sadness, indeed. Feeling Tony’s gentle fingers just _there,_ knowing he’d made that psychic connection _(thank you so much, Mother)_ just intensified Loki’s own feeling of loss. And, he kept hearing Tony’s words— _the kid would have a good life, I promise_ —to the point that he almost believed them. “I, uh—”

 

Whatever Loki was about to say was cut short when Tony’s phone vibrated in his pocket. Tony made a big sniff and cleared his throat as he checked the caller ID. “Uh-oh.” He gave Loki an apologetic look. “Uh—I’m sorry babe, but I have seriously got to go make nice with Pepper. I did kind of leave her high and dry with the stockholders earlier. Plus, I need to check on a couple of things in the lab. Everything’s under control here, right?”

 

“Yes, it’s fine.”

 

“Good. Tell you what—I’ll get  someone to come up and change the sheets and clean the room, and then I’ll order us a pizza. You just relax, tell JARVIS if you need anything. I’ll be back in about an hour and then we can talk some more, okay?”

 

“Okay,” Loki agreed. He realized he desperately needed a little time alone. He wasn’t used to having so many emotions playing havoc with his thought process, or to being around someone who was sharing those same emotions and making him doubt himself. 

 

He wanted to, as Tony called it, “chill,” and occupy himself with something that would give his mind a break, something stupid-but-amusing, the sort of entertainment Midgard seemed to produce in abundance. “I’ll find something to watch on the television device in the living room. Or, may I peruse your bookcase? You have some rather intriguing titles there.” Loki found Midgardian “science fiction” stories delightfully absurd.

 

“Sure, sweetie, help yourself. Anything you want. This is your home too, now.” Tony gave him a quick kiss, his mind having moved on to thoughts of at last sharing his home with his beautiful alien space-god. It was going to be _cool._ Cuddling in bed with him. Waking up with him in his arms on a regular basis. Arguing over which show to watch, making room for his stuff. Listening for his footsteps. Ducking shape-altering magic-zaps when he pissed him off—yeah, okay, a little scary maybe, but good. He hugged him. “God, baby, I’m so fucking happy. What the hell have you done to me? I love you.”

 

Loki raised an eyebrow—he still couldn’t quite believe Tony was saying those words, but, oddly enough, they sounded right, and he just smiled. “Oh, Stark. I refuse to take responsibility for your foolishness, I’m having enough trouble accepting my own. But, I love you too.”

 

Tony squeezed his hand. “Damn. You and me, finally. It’s gonna be fantastic.”

 

“Of course it is. I wouldn’t accept anything less.”

 

“All right. I’ll see you in a little while. Try not to, you know...” Tony gestured at the demolished chair and Loki nodded.

 

“I’ll do my best.”

 

Tony roused himself from the chair, gave Loki one more kiss, and headed for the door. 

 

********

Loki watched Tony leave and then he curled up, cat-like, in the warm spot that Tony’s body had just been occupying. He smiled; he didn’t hurt, nor did he want for anything. No one was relentlessly pursuing him, hoping to either kill or imprison him. He had a few people in his life that loved him, notably one Tony Stark, who actually foresaw a future with him. 

 

Loki was content.

 

After a moment, a little fleet of robots lined up at the door, looking for all the world like mechanical animals awaiting permission to enter. JARVIS’ voice came over the speaker system: “Master Loki, will you allow the cleaning crew to come in?”

 

“Yes, fine.” He sat up and watched with interest as metal arms worked in tandem to yank soiled linen from the bed, while a vacu-bot went around efficiently sucking up poly-fiber stuffing from all the surfaces of the room. It was rather hypnotic. 

 

Once fresh sheets had been tucked in and a clean bedspread laid on top of the bed, the dirty ones were whisked away and the vacuum-cleaner fellow zipped along behind.

 

Loki laughed. Tony truly was a genius. It was astonishing to see what Midgardian minds could come up with to overcome their unfortunate lack of magical abilities.

 

He lounged for a moment longer, but felt restless. He finally stood up and stretched, and immediately felt lazy. He was just considering getting a snack and then finding a nice spot for a nap, when he heard a thunderous flapping noise that seemed to be coming from outside and above the building.

 

_Thor?_ he thought; no, it didn’t sound like him, and anyway, he couldn’t possibly have returned with the potion this quickly. No, this was something else, and he was fairly sure that whatever it was, it wasn’t good. He stood stock-still, trying to decide what to do. 

 

Loki had never run from a fight in his life, but he was at all kinds of disadvantages here. Unfamiliar territory, no weapons, using magic too risky—he made a quick decision and started toward the door. Maybe he could get out of the Tower before—

 

Too late. A projectile came crashing through the plate glass window, shattering it completely, and a huge helicopter with a familiar emblem came into view, hovering out beyond the ledge.

 

A kind of platform was fed out, creating a walkway from there to inside the room.

 

Loki froze as four men clad in odd-looking coveralls and helmets, all made of a clear gelatinous substance, came pouring in through the window. They were carrying some sort of weapons that Loki had never seen before and they quickly had Loki surrounded.

 

“Stay where you are, Loki,” came a familiar voice through a bullhorn. Agent Coulson followed the agents inside, watching as they grabbed Loki, pulled his arms behind his back and clamped on cuffs made of the same gelatinous material as their suits. The manacles felt warm and vibrant on Loki’s wrists and he stared curiously at Coulson. A sly grin came over his face.

 

“Ah, Agent Coulson. I take it you’re feeling better than the last time I saw you?”

 

“Matter of fact, I am, thanks for asking. You did a pretty serious number on me, though.”

 

“Merely defending myself. Even so, I obviously had no intention of snuffing out your life completely. I suppose it’s a good thing the restorative spell took effect before they brought you to the embalming chamber, eh?”

 

“Yes, and don’t think I don’t appreciate it. Although, I have to say, coming back from the dead isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.” Coulson looked Loki up and down and then gave him a mildly puzzled look. “What’s that you’re wearing?”

 

“Oh, uh—my own clothes were in a bit of disarray, so I took these from Stark.”

 

“Mm. Speaking of which, where is he?” Coulson came closer. “What have you done with him? Is he even alive?”

 

“He’s perfectly well.”

 

One of the agents was studying an instrument he held in his hand. “He’s in the basement laboratory, sir, according to this. Life signs are strong.”

 

“That’s good. So, what’ve you been up to, Loki—did you put some kind of mind-control spell on him while you holed up here in his house? And, why would you do that—what are you planning?”

 

Loki shrugged. “My activities are none of your agency’s concern.”

 

“Not true. We were assured you’d be serving a life sentence in an Asgardian prison, yet here you are.”

 

“I was released. I’m in a recovery program as a condition of my probation. Ask Odin. Nothing nefarious, it’s all above board, I assure you.”

 

“Well, we weren’t informed by the proper authorities of this development, and until we hear otherwise, you’re under arrest.” Coulson gave a small smile. “And, SHIELD operates outside of the U.S. justice system, so... I wouldn’t hold my breath on any requests being sent for an update. Oh, and don’t bother trying any of your magic on us—the material on these agents’ suits and on your handcuffs works to counteract the energy you utilize for it. Kind of levels the playing field, if you  know what I mean.”

 

Loki gave Coulson a knowing smirk. “Ah. Levels it insofar as your team has significant weaponry, whereas I’m on my own without even a pen knife, is that it? Interesting turn of phrase.”

 

“Yes, well.”  Coulson gestured toward the helicopter and addressed two of his agents. “Let’s go. The rest of you, find Stark and bring him back to headquarters. I’m sure Director Fury will have a few questions for him.”

 

*****

 

Tony was in his lab, using his most sincere tone of voice as he spoke into his cell phone.

 

“Aw, Pepper, come on—I swear, I had no choice! I told you, a pipe sprang a leak, and, by the way? It was a good thing I left when I did, because the water was two inches deep by the time I got here. Huh? Oh, come on, DUMMY’s no plumber! He couldn’t—”

 

“Mr. Stark, there’s been a breach upstairs. Agents from SHIELD have deployed into your bedroom,” JARVIS’ voice intoned.

 

Tony felt as if his muscles had been replaced with concrete. All he could manage was a strangled, _“What?”_ before a crashing sound filled the room and Tony looked up to see the heavy door to his lab being kicked opened. “Holy shit. Pep, I’ll have to call you back.” Tony dropped his phone without bothering to punch the “end call” button and raised his hands defensively as the agents entered with weapons raised. 

 

“Tony Stark? You need to accompany us to SHIELD headquarters, per orders from Nick Fury.”

 

“Okay, hold on, guys. I have a feeling there’s been a small misunderstanding—I know I paid those parking tickets, and if you’ll just check your records, I think you’ll see that I—”

 

“Please come with us, sir.”

 

“Do I have a choice?”

 

The agents stared impassively at him from behind their face-shields. The weapons in their hands weren’t yet aimed at Tony, but he was pretty sure that wouldn’t last long if he didn’t cooperate. He nodded.

 

“I’m guessing not. Could you at least tell me why you’re here?”

 

“Suspected presence of an unauthorized alien life form, which has since been confirmed. The subject has been taken into custody. Director Fury would like to interview you concerning the matter.”

 

_Loki. They have Loki._ A sharp rush of fear stabbed into Tony’s chest. “Of course he would. So, you say you confirmed the alien life form? Was he, I mean, it, actively doing anything, you know—evil, when you made the confirmation?”

 

“No, sir.”

 

“So, no alien guts to clean up before we leave?”

 

“No, sir. The subject did not resist.”

 

_Thank God for that._ Tony nodded again, only somewhat relieved. “Well, that’s good. It’s so hard to keep a tidy home these days. All right—let’s go.” He didn’t want Loki on his own in SHIELD’s hands any longer than necessary. The agents led Tony to a waiting car outside his street-level front door. 

 

_“Tony? Tony!”_ Pepper had only half-heard the conversation once the phone fell to the floor, but got enough to know that something was up. 

 

She called Bruce Banner.

 

*****

 

The helicopter set down on a rooftop. The agents hustled Loki through a door into an empty room, then through another door that led to a hallway that led to an elevator. 

 

Loki figured he had some time. 

 

After all, he hadn’t done anything wrong. He supposed accidentally blowing up an innocent toaster and a harmless overstuffed easy chair might be a senseless waste of several thousand Midgardian dollars, but it wasn’t a matter of intergalactic security for him to do so. 

 

He assumed his magic-gone-astray had alerted them to his presence, but he hadn’t violated any of the terms of his parole. He could show them the scar on his torso if they wanted proof of that. It wasn’t his fault that the Allfather hadn’t bothered to inform Fury of his arrangements following Loki’s rehabilitation. 

 

It would just take some time to sort everything out, and Tony had assured him that he would attend to such things. He might sit in a jail cell for a few days... or weeks... but, sooner or later, things would work out, so he wasn’t overly concerned.

 

Until the group was met in an underground facility by Nick Fury himself.

 

“Well, well, well, what do we have here? If it isn’t Thor’s little bro, Loki! Thought we’d seen the last of you! Yet, here you are...” Fury’s lip was curled into an expression of sheer malice. “How  did that come to be?”

 

“Yes, well. I’m sorry you’ve been left in the dark regarding my status back in Asgard. As it happens, I’ve been released, with certain stipulations. I can assure you, I’m no longer a threat to your realm. And, I’ve done nothing wrong. So, I’m sure we can clear up this whole matter to everyone’s satisfaction if only we could just sit down and—”

 

“First of all, you may be shocked to hear this, but I don’t believe a damn word that comes out of your mouth. And, second, you may not have been threatening the planet at the time of your apprehension, but at the very least, we’ve got you on a breaking and entering charge. Unless you mean to say that Tony Stark was aware of your presence in his home?”

 

Loki gave his best sneer. He had to be careful—he didn’t want to get Tony in hot water with this outfit, but at the same time, he didn’t have a ready explanation for why he would be in Stark Tower. “I have nothing to say, and I don’t believe I’m required to make a statement on the grounds that anything I say could be used to incriminate me.”

 

“Listen, pal. Not one single point of law applies in this case—you’re not exactly a citizen of Earth, much less of the United States. So, say what you want, it won’t do you any good. You belong to me, now. And, I’ve definitely got plans for you, now that your magic’s contained.” Fury gestured at the cuffs on Loki’s wrists. “With those things on, you’re about as much of a threat as outer space tree moss. Let’s not even get into how silly you look in those pajamas. Now, for starters, we’re finally going to get a good look at your insides—don’t worry, nothing painful, just a little bit of x-ray technology. For _now._ We’ll work on getting you to talk later. Take him to the exam room.”

 

Fury turned on his heel and left his men to wrangle Loki into a small room fitted with an x-ray machine. They forced him onto a gurney and secured his hands and feet with leather straps. A small young woman in a lab coat was standing by. When Loki was secured, the men left the room and she gave Loki an uncertain smile.

 

“Hi.”

 

“Hello.”

 

“I’m Jan. Uh... Just gonna take a few pictures. It’s best if you hold still. Wriggling around’ll just make it take longer.”

 

Loki gazed at the machine. He didn’t know a lot about Midgardian technology, but he’d watched so much public service TV by now that he had some familiarity with a lot of common medical equipment. “Excuse me—as you know, I’m not from around here,” he said in a chatty tone. “Could you tell me how this thing works?”

 

Jan was busy checking the machine’s settings. Her job was rather thankless and most of her subjects were in a pretty piss-poor mood by the time she got to them, so she welcomed a little harmless small-talk from a decidedly attractive extraterrestrial. “Electromagnetic waves bounce through your body and create images. It’s like looking at your insides without... you know, actually getting in there.”

 

“I see. And, I believe it produces something called radiation. Is it true that this radiation can have an ill effect on a fetus?” Loki asked casually.

 

Jan laughed. “Yes, absolutely. Not something _you_ have to worry about though, right?”

 

“No, of course not. But, just for the sake of my education, what exactly might it do to a developing creature, I mean, infant?”

 

“Well, it could cause birth defects. Or, cancer.”

 

“Ah. I see.” Loki lay back, watching as Jan positioned the camera at the middle of his torso. 

 

Right where the baby was. 

 

_No._

 

Something in the back of Loki’s mind snapped. His baby... Tony’s baby... He couldn’t let them hurt it. He stared at the machine. A sensitive unit, delicate calibrations—wouldn’t take much to make it inoperable. He flexed his hands. He could feel the interference from the cuffs. Coulson had been so smug, but maybe the damn things weren’t as effective as he thought, maybe with Loki’s magic being a bit haywire, it would be just right—without thinking any more about it, Loki concentrated a small spurt of energy toward the x-ray unit. He felt it go disappointingly flat, but then it seemed to rebound, re-route through his belly, and suddenly the entire machine began to shake and buzz. 

 

“What the—” was all Jan had time to say before the unit exploded. Well, imploded, kind of like a mini-nuclear melt-down, creating a loud whoosh that drove energy into itself. Alarms went off, and the leather bindings on Loki’s hands and feet disintegrated, along with the anti-magic cuffs. The little lab tech was thrown hard against a wall, and Loki stared at her limp body.

 

_Oh, no... Oh, shit. Shit-shit-shit..._

 

Loki launched himself off the gurney and ran to the girl’s side. She wasn’t breathing. He felt for her pulse, but found nothing. _No-no-no-no..._

 

This was _so_ the opposite of what Odin had stipulated in the terms of his release from prison. 

 

He was not to harm another being with his magic, not even for self-defense, not even by accident.

 

And here he’d apparently killed this girl. Which meant Odin would kill _him._

 

Loki instinctively drew on something he’d seen on one of his public service TV shows, and positioned his hands in the middle of Jan’s chest. He then pushed down in a powerful compression, and followed with mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. He repeated his efforts until the girl sputtered and coughed and opened her eyes. “Huh?” she gasped.

 

“Oh, good. You’re not dead. Try to stay that way.” With that, Loki slipped out of the exam room and cautiously began to make his way down the hall.

 


	17. In the Hall of SHIELD Headquarters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Odin shows up and Frigga steps in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long chapter! And, we're nearing the end of the story. Hope you're still enjoying!

 

Intermittent sirens wailed and emergency strobe lights flashed in the hallway. Loki hurried, searching for an exit, even though he knew full well that he wouldn’t get far.

 

“This is all your fault, you know,” he said, addressing his stomach. “Obviously, you’re taking the initiative regarding which of us will meet our demise first; unfortunately for you, at this point, when I go, you go.” He patted his tummy with some affection. “Didn’t think of that, did you? Of course, you’re only just a fetus, so your flawed logic is forgivable, but that doesn’t make our situation here any less dire, does it?—Oh.”

 

He’d only made it halfway down the hall when three of the men that had apprehended him in the first place came around the corner, still dressed in the jelly suits and carrying weapons. Loki put an innocent smile on his face, ran a hand through his hair, and straightened his stance to his full regal height.

 

“Ah, gentlemen, there you are. You’re probably wondering what all the noise was about. Just a little equipment malfunction, no cause for alarm. Although, the young woman in the exam room could do with a bit of first aid—” One of the men ran off to check on her, while the other two leveled their weapons at Loki. He slowly raised his hands; at this point, he almost welcomed being in SHIELD’s custody. They wouldn’t be able to save him from the Allfather, but they might at least slow things down a bit, maybe even give him a chance to see Tony one last time, if he were to somehow turn up. His musings were interrupted by the sight of Fury and Coulson running down the hall towards him.

 

Fury came to a halt in front of him. “What the actual _fuck_ do you think you’re doing?” Fury shouted, partly at the universe in general, but mostly at Loki.

 

“The lab tech is injured,” one of the agents said.

 

“Oh, great. What the hell, Coulson, I thought you said your invention would disable the space freak’s magical abilities?”

 

Coulson pursed his lips. “Well, it’s not like I had anything to test it on. But, it should’ve worked.”

 

“All right, well, throw ‘the god’s’ ass in the slammer. Jack him full of sedatives if you need to,” Fury directed. The agents stepped forward, prepared to wrest Loki’s arms behind his back and cuff him.

 

But, before they could get close enough to do so, Tony came barreling around the corner, followed by two guards who were ostensibly in charge of him. He stopped dead at the sight of the agents wearing what looked like hazmat suits, but he quickly spotted Loki behind them and began loping toward him. _“Loki!_ ” he yelled. “Are you okay? Hey, Biohazard, leave him alone, he didn’t do anything!”

 

Everyone turned to look at the agitated man advancing on them. In spite of the hopelessness of the situation, a burst of warmth surged in Loki’s chest; _So he did come for me,_ he thought. _Poor stupid bastard, as if he could do any good._ He drank in the sight of him, his little banty-rooster of a mortal, his beloved. It felt so good to see him, but he didn’t want Tony’s last memory of him to be of his death throes at the hands of Odin. “Stark, get out of here,” he ordered in a strained tone. “I—”

 

But, all words and thought stopped as the building began to shake. 

 

The air felt heavy, and a self-contained whirlwind arose from nowhere. Loki’s heart sank. Well, of course. It was unfolding just as he’d expected. _How typical,_ he thought. _I finally found my love, my mate, and now I’m to lose him forever... Gods, I’m not ready._ He glanced down and ran a hand over his belly. Strange little creature inside him. His child, Tony’s child. _And, you_... _Funny, in spite of all the trouble you’ve caused, I somehow don’t want to lose you, either..._ Tony said they could give it a happy life, the fool. But maybe it would have been possible, if only... Well, no point in thinking like that. 

 

It was too late.

 

The whirlwind abated, leaving two huge Asgardian warriors dressed in full battle gear in its wake. They pushed the bewildered SHIELD agents out of the way, bound Loki’s arms behind his back and then forced him to his knees. More alarms went off, EMTs were streaming in to tend to the lab tech, Fury was screaming in disgust at the Asgardian intrusion, Coulson was staring, and Tony was fighting through all of them to get to Loki. In the confusion, he managed to reach him and he fell to his knees in front of him. He took Loki’s face in his hands, his eyes wild with worry. 

 

Loki smiled sadly at him. “I fucked up, Tony. I’m sorry. But, you should go. I don’t want you to see—”

 

“I’m not going anywhere! Don’t worry, it’s okay, it’s okay, we can still—”

 

“No, you don’t understand. It’s too late, a mortal girl was hurt by my misguided _seidr,_ and that means I’ve reached the end. I’ll be granted no further consideration.” He rubbed his cheek against Tony’s palm. “I’ve lost you. I’ve lost you both,” he murmured.

 

But then, all went silent, the sirens stopped, the lighting dimmed, and Odin appeared, coming in like a last hot gasping breath, imperiously bearing his spear, Gungnir.  And, whether they wanted to or not, everyone became quiet and still. It felt as if all the air in the room had been pumped out and was now concentrated in the space between the Allfather and his adopted son.

 

“Loki,” the majestic elder god intoned. “What have you done?” 

 

Loki gave him a desperate look, but he spoke as calmly as he could, staring into the face of his once father, bearing the instrument of death in his hands. “I didn’t mean to hurt her, Father. It was an accident, I swear. If only I could explain—”

 

Odin wore a deceptively merry countenance. “Oh, am I to suffer through another of your intricately-crafted lies? Or, perhaps your tongue holds the truth for once. Well, it matters not.” His expression turned to a cold mask of disdain. “You have abused my trust for the last time. No more shame, no more humiliation at your hands, Loki. No more chances.”

 

“But, she lives, Father! I was able to right my mistake. Please!”

 

“It matters not,” Odin snapped. “Her heart stopped. She drew no breath. All because of you. Employing magic to bring her back does not erase the circumstance of her death one whit.”

 

Loki looked up at Odin, pleading in his eyes. “It was not magic, sire, I used a Midgardian rescue technique, she should suffer no lasting ill effects. She—Look! There she is, on her feet! You see?” Loki jutted his chin toward the door where Jan was being guided out of the x-ray room with a small bandage on her forehead. She paused to stare at the strange men surrounding Loki, and then she sought Loki’s eyes, quickly grasping the situation. 

 

“Wait, what are you doing?” she demanded of the guards. “He didn’t do this to me, it was an accident! He helped me! I’m fine, it’s just a little cut—” One of the EMTs  muttered something about a concussion and tried to persuade her to sit in a wheelchair, but Jan refused, insisting she could walk perfectly well and to leave her alone. The medical tech had to settle for hurrying her away from the scene in order to get her to the clinic for observation.

 

 Odin didn’t even bother to turn his head.

 

“I repeat, it matters not. You violated the terms of your release, as I knew you would. It is time to end this farce.” 

 

“So, am I to have no trial? No opportunity to plead my case?” Loki asked bitterly, knowing the answer perfectly well.

 

Nick Fury found his voice. “He’s in my custody, Allfather. Why don’t you leave him to us?”

 

Odin favored him with a slight laugh. “You are funny, mortal. My son’s fate belongs to me, just as it has since the day I stupidly rescued him from Jotunheim.” He raised his spear. “It is now my sad duty to end the disreputable life of one who once held so much promise. One for whom I had nothing but high hopes and expectations. One who—”

 

The despair on Loki’s face turned to raw anger. “Hopes? _Expectations?_ I was never anything to you but a curiosity! At this final hour, can you not finally admit that? You call me a liar, but it is you who’s perpetuated the lie that has been my entire life. Give me this much, Father. Let me hear the truth fall from your lips before I die.”

 

Odin gave a sardonic huff. “You’ve always made your own truth, Loki. Feel free to continue to do so here in your last moments.” Odin again raised his spear.

 

 _“No!”_ Tony bellowed as he threw himself around Loki’s thin frame. “Back _off!_ Don’t touch him!” The Asgardian warriors made to yank him aside, but Odin stopped them with a raised hand, and they reluctantly fell back.

 

Odin gave Tony a mildly curious look. “I have no wish to harm you, human, but you’d best get out of the way.” He cocked his head, looking deeply into Tony’s eyes. “What matters Loki’s fate to you, anyway?”

 

“He’s my mate,” Tony said firmly. “And, not in the ‘g’day, mate,’Australian sense, either. We’re, you know... together.” He pressed his forehead to Loki’s for a moment and then glared defiantly at Odin. “We’re a package deal, Highness—you take him, you take me.”

 

“Stark, don’t be an idiot! Get out of here, now!” Loki hissed.

 

Odin was now frowning, apparently mystified. “Don’t be absurd, mortal. Your life is of no consequence to me, but I’m sure it is precious to you, even in its brevity. Step aside immediately.”

 

When Tony showed no inclination to move, genuine fear showed on Loki’s face for the first time. “Do it! He’ll run you through to get to me. I don’t want that, I don’t want you to—”

 

Tony fixed him with a laser-like stare, forcing his attention to remain firmly on his words. “Listen to me—tell him about the baby,” he whispered urgently.

 

Loki shook his head. “It won’t matter. He won’t believe me, he’ll just think I’m stalling and that’ll make it all the worse. Let me go, Tony. There’s nothing you can do.”

 

“Like hell there isn’t.” Tony stood up, standing protectively between Odin and Loki, and he gave the Allfather a look of pure steel, even though he was more than a little rattled knowing the god could smite him at any moment, smite the _dickens_ out of him, with just a flick of his wrist. Still, he noted that Odin was watching him with some interest. He squared his shoulders and cleared his throat before speaking.

 

“So, Mr., uh, Allfather, let me get this straight. You wouldn’t have a problem murdering a human, I get that. And, wow, offing your own kid, the one you raised from infancy, without even giving him a trial, that doesn’t faze you. But, how about an innocent little unborn baby, huh? Would killing one of those freak you out at all? Maybe just a teeny bit?”

 

“Whatever are you on about?” Odin asked, rather indulgently. “What unborn baby?”

 

“Loki’s pregnant. With _my_ kid, in case you haven’t tumbled to that.” For a moment, the dull hum of the people still gathered in the hallway hushed completely. Even Nick Fury looked stunned. Then, he laughed.

 

“Stark, you are a case. What kind of bullshit tactic is this? If I can’t have him, let the big guy visit justice on the creep that fucked up Manhattan and let’s all get back to work, shall we?”

 

Odin raised a hand and the hush returned. “Mortal, have you fallen under Loki’s spell? Has he convinced you of an absurd impossibility to win your favor? My sympathies, but know at least that you are in fine company. Loki’s managed to work his _seidr_ on the gods themselves. I regret to see your simple trust broken, but he is _not_ capable of becoming pregnant, and—” 

 

As insulated at they were in the underground fortress, they heard a sudden sharp clap of thunder. A deep, rolling rumble went through the building, and then, at the end of the hall, Thor and Frigga appeared. The little crowd gave way as they regally strode past on their way to Odin. 

 

Thor surveyed the scene, and then gave a small deferential bow to his father. “Father, forgive the disturbance, but, at her request, I have escorted the Allmother to this strange underground dwelling as she has urgent need of speaking with you.”  He gave an uncertain sniff. “I trust this is all some sort of huge misunderstanding and that the two of you will... work it out. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must find Lady Potts and Bruce Banner.” He bowed again, and turned to leave his parents to their discussion.

 

 Frigga looked from Loki, bound and on his knees, to Odin, and she shook her head disgustedly. “Husband—what in the Nine do you think you’re doing?”

 

Odin cast a thunderous look at his wife. “Frigga! Why are you here, you shouldn’t be here!”

 

“Thor was summoned by Miss Potts to render aid to her good friend, Tony Stark,” she explained with a gesture toward Tony. “I chose to accompany him; suffice to say, I have my reasons, not the least of which is that Heimdall reported that my youngest son was being held captive at SHIELD headquarters due to _your_ purposeful lack of communication with the director. I didn’t realize that you yourself were on hand, playing ringmaster! Now, stop all this nonsense and tell me what Loki’s done.”

 

“He has broken the terms of his probation. His _seidr_ caused the death of a human female _._ ”

 

“Yet, she lives,” Loki hissed to his mother. 

 

Frigga frowned at her husband. “That sounds like quite the contradiction. Have you given the accused a chance to speak on his own behalf?” 

 

“That will not be necessary! Now, I’ve had enough of your loving but misguided interference, wife. This matter is out of your hands. Leave us, and put thoughts of the second prince of Asgard out of your mind for good. I was wrong ever to have brought him to you.” Once more, Odin raised his spear.

 

Frigga narrowed her eyes. _“No.”_ She stepped forward and grabbed Odin’s arm, pushing him away from Loki. “Clearly, you’ve pronounced him guilty with no attempt at understanding. I suspect you’ve cast judgment based only on your own damaged pride. Now, hear me well—until you know what really happened, you will harm neither our son, nor our grandchild. I will not allow it.”

 

Odin gave her the Asgardian equivalent of a “WTF?” look. “Gods, woman, has he enchanted you as well? Don’t be absurd—he’s not with child, that’s impossible. Loki is playing everyone for a fool, as usual.” 

 

“Do _I_ look like a fool?” Frigga asked sharply.

 

Odin shifted uncomfortably. “No, of course not, my dear, but—”

 

“I tell you, he _is_ pregnant. You refuse to give weight to my words? Then, find out for yourself.” She gestured for Loki to stand. “Come here, dear. Odin, place your hand on his belly and open your mind. Discover the truth.”

 

Odin regarded Loki with supreme irritation, but he did as ordered, and a golden aura appeared around the god’s hand. Loki gasped as a gentle energy reverberated through his nervous system. Tony kept his eyes on Odin’s face and saw the moment when his cynical expression melted into something else.

 

“By the gods,” Odin whispered. “It’s true. I didn’t think... I didn’t think it was possible... Frigga?”

 

Frigga nodded. “I know. And, I don’t believe it was, until Loki came into contact with the Tessaract. It seems that cursed stone exposed a weakness in the spell you cast upon him as an infant.” She caressed Loki’s face. “Being with child has been known to severely disrupt a sorceress’ use of her _seidr._ Apparently, it is the same for a sorcerer. Loki, tell the Allfather what events led to the young woman’s injury.”

 

Loki looked drained. He was staring dully at the floor, but at his mother’s request, he raised his eyes. “Fury ordered an examination to be performed upon me, using an instrument which emits a powerful force, harmful to a fetus. I only sent a tiny bit of magic to try to disrupt the machine’s function in order to protect the baby from its effects. I didn’t even think it would work, due to the manacles Agent Coulson created. But, the spell came out so much more powerfully than I intended and the machine exploded. The girl was injured in the blast, but she was never the target of my attempt. And, I was able to bring her back to consciousness before she was permanently damaged.” Loki drew himself up and sought his father’s eye. “I swear, that’s the truth.”

 

“You were trying to protect the babe,” Frigga said softly.

 

Loki gave her a look. “I didn’t know what was to become of me as SHIELD’s captive. In case the child survived, I didn’t want it to suffer for my failings.”

 

Coulson stepped forward. “Excuse me, sorry to interrupt, but I have a question—the cuffs, did they do any good at all? I mean, did they at least slow you down?” he asked hopefully.

 

“I think they worked perfectly, actually. I could feel the _seidr_ die away before it left my hands. But then...” Loki glanced down at his stomach and then at his mother. “Is it possible that the fetus acted as a conduit?” he asked her in an awed tone.

 

Frigga smiled. “If these ‘cuffs’ you speak of somehow prevented the _seidr_ from leaving your body, then, yes, the babe could have sent it on its way, perhaps even adding strength of its own to the spell.” She cast a pointed look at Odin. “Like a reflex. It would have been completely out of Loki’s control at that point.”

 

Odin was silent for a moment, clearly mulling things over in his mind. He gave Frigga a reproving frown, but then, he made his pronouncement. “All right. Loki, the preponderance of evidence suggests that you are not directly at fault for the injury to the mortal girl, and I cannot punish you for the involuntary response of your unborn child. Therefore, I proclaim you innocent.” He held his hand over the shackles on Loki’s wrists and they fell open to the floor. “You are free. Now, try to stay out of trouble. I don’t want your mother traveling to Midgard again, it’s too dangerous.” _For me,_ he thought wryly. He had a feeling he’d be banished from their bedchamber for a night or two.

 

Loki looked a bit stunned and wobbly, but after drawing a few deep breaths, he managed to say, “You are truly just, Allfather. Thank you.”

 

Tony was grinning and he wrapped Loki in a tight hug.

 

Everyone else was staring open-mouthed.

 

“Now, just one damn minute,” Fury snarled at Odin. “He may be off the hook on Asgard’s terms, but he still has no business hanging around my planet without permission. I’m locking his ass up from now to doomsday!”

 

“Loki has been freed to move about the realms as he pleases, providing he causes no harm. But I will not interfere with Midgardian law. Do with him as you see fit,” Odin said easily. 

 

 _“Odin!”_ Frigga hissed.

 

“I’m sorry, my dear, but he’s on his own,” Odin said with a smug grin. “This incident has distracted me from my duties for far too long as it is. I must return to Asgard, and I would appreciate it if you also would return home at your earliest convenience. I believe we have some things to discuss.” Then, the air grew dense and the Allfather and his warriors disappeared.

 

Fury gave a smile of satisfaction. “All right, now that’s more like it. Somebody get me another set of those anti-magic cuffs, and—”

 

Abruptly, Tony stuck his fist in the air. “Amnesty!” he shouted. With his hair untamed and his shirt untucked, he looked a bit like a frayed freedom-fighter.

 

“Huh?” Fury asked.

 

“Amnesty! I demand amnesty for Loki!”

 

 _“Amnesty!_ On what grounds?”

 

“Dude, he saved our planet!” 

 

“Oh, he saved it after he tried to subjugate and then destroy it?” Fury asked skeptically.

 

“Yeah! I mean later, after all that. It’s a long story, he got hurt in the process, but trust me, he did a good thing and deserves amnesty. Where’d Thor go? He’ll tell you, he has proof.”

 

“I can’t get over you, Stark. First, you turn queer, although I don’t know if that’s even the right term when you’re shtupping an extraterrestrial, but you manage to father a child with the freak, and now you’re claiming he deserves amnesty? You’re trippin’.”

 

Heavy footsteps thudded over the din and Thor strode up, Mjolnir in hand, followed by Pepper and Bruce Banner. The three stopped in their tracks at Fury’s words, and, open mouthed, they looked from Fury, to Tony, to Loki. _“What?”_ Thor demanded, sounding utterly bewildered. “Tony, you...? And _Loki?_ What manner of insanity is this?” Bruce and Pepper stood by in shock.

 

Loki sighed resignedly, but there was a small twinkle of mischief in his eye. “It’s true, brother. You’re going to be an uncle.”

 

Thor was just standing there, moving his mouth with no words coming out. Finally, he managed to gasp, _“How?”_

 

“Oh, you know. Just one of the perks of being Jotun.” Loki dismissively waved a hand, but his shoulders slumped. He suddenly felt incredibly tired, almost as if his legs were about to give out on him.

 

Thor took in Loki’s explanation and slowly nodded. “Oh, I see—Your true form holds its secrets. So, you somehow managed to seduce friend Stark and now you’re going to bear his issue.”

 

“Brilliant summarization, brother. You’re not as dumb as you look.”

 

“By the Nine, Loki, you put a spell on him!”

 

A little spark of aggravation came alit in Loki. “I did not! Why does everyone think that?” He stared balefully at his brother for a moment and then added, “Am I really that unloveable? Is that the only way you can imagine someone caring for me, by the use of _seidr?”_

 

Thor looked as if he was about to say something, but Fury broke in. “I hate to interrupt the therapy session, gentlemen, but Mr. Loki has a nice, comfy cell waiting for him upstairs. Now, if you’ll just—”

 

 _“Amnesty,”_ Tony repeated. “Thor, the documents? Trondheim and all that?”

 

Thor dropped his gaze from his brother’s anguished countenance, and turned to face Fury and Tony. 

 

“Yes. It is as the Man of Iron says.” He produced a deerskin sheath containing a packet of documents and placed it in Fury’s hands. “These bear my father’s seal, attesting to the verity of these statements.” 

 

Fury opened the pack and scanned a few pages. He shook his head irritably. “This is ridiculous, this character killed our citizens, brought alien creatures to attack us—”

 

“That was before his rehabilitation. Another attack was in the making, but thanks to Loki, it was found out and averted. And, it could easily happen again.” Thor stood majestically in front of Fury. “There are many elements among the realms in a state of unrest. Loki is the only one who can help me detect their presence in time to prevent another such attack. You would be a fool to lock him away when he could be the key to your realm’s salvation. And, I’m sure I’m not the only one who would think that,” Thor said emphatically, glancing purposefully at a portrait of the country’s President.

 

The gesture wasn’t lost on Fury, and he again turned his attention to the documents, scowling as he read them through. When he finished, he looked up, resignation evident on his face. “Yeah, all right. Well, I guess I have no choice. Fine. Loki, you’re free on your own recognizance while I submit all this to the council.” He came up to stand face to face with Loki. “Just don’t fuck up again.”

 

Loki squeezed his eyes closed. “I won’t.” When he opened them, he looked at Tony. “I can’t. for the first time in my life, I have too much to lose.”

 

Frigga leaned in and hugged Loki tightly. She pressed a glass vial into his hand and  kissed his cheek. Loki tucked the vial into his pajama pocket. Tony figured he knew what it was and he watched with his heart sinking. But he came in for a hug as well, and then he pulled back and looked into Loki’s eyes.

 

“What do you say, slugger? How about we get out of here?”

 

“I would like that very much.”

 

Pepper walked up to Tony. “Wait. You owe me an explanation,” she said simply.

 

“I wouldn’t mind one, myself,” Bruce added, blinking a little faster than normal.

 

Tony nodded ruefully. “Yeah. You’re right, I do. I owe you both an explanation. But...” He looked at Loki, noting his worn, exhausted appearance. “... I need to get this one home and let him get some rest. How about you both come over tonight and we’ll have dinner? Thor, Frigga? You, too?”

 

Frigga smiled. “I would love that, but I’m afraid I have to go make peace with my husband. And, I think Thor needs a little time to... absorb the situation.” 

 

Thor gave a beleaguered huff in agreement. “Yes.” He turned to where Tony was standing with his arm firmly around Loki’s waist. “So... You two are happy?” he asked, sounding dubious.

 

“Yeah, we are,” Tony said. 

 

“And this... _romance._.. has been going on for... some time?”

 

“Yup.”

 

Thor looked at Loki. “You _love_ him?”

 

“I do.” He regarded Tony fondly. “Surely you didn’t think I was keeping company with him because I share his appreciation of Midgardian sporting matches, did you?” 

 

“I think you’ll like football once I explain it to you,” Tony noted as an aside.

 

Loki smiled, but it turned to an impatient frown at the sight of Thor’s expression. “What?”

 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Thor sounded sad. “Why didn’t you share your happiness with me? I thought... I thought things were getting better between us.”

 

“Oh, gods...” Now, Loki looked almost apologetic. “I assumed you’d taunt me for being _argr._ And...” He looked downward. “It wasn’t my place to sully your opinion of Tony.”

 

Thor rolled his eyes. “Do you really think so little of me? You honestly believe that would make a difference in my feelings toward you—either of you?” He threw his hands up in annoyance. “It is of no consequence to me who you love, Loki. I only ever wished for you to find happiness.” 

 

Loki hesitated, and when he spoke, the words seemed to come hard. “Apologies, brother. I... I fear I underestimated your good heart.” Loki didn’t meet Thor’s gaze, but the blond god placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. 

 

“It is... okay. Seems we still have much to learn about one another.” At that, Loki looked up and they smiled ruefully at each other.

 

Thor then turned to Tony, a slight grin tugging at his lips. “So, this is why you’ve been giving him such kind and tender care. I should have realized. But, you kept me in the dark as well.”

 

Tony shrugged. “Well, I figured you’d whack me with the magic hammer for defiling your little brother.”

 

“You’re hardly the first to do that.”

 

“Shut up, Thor,” Loki sighed.

 

“Ah, now things are back to normal!” Thor said jovially. “Well, congratulations to the both of you. I look forward to having a little one to spoil.”

 

Tony frowned. “Uh—Listen, Point Break, I’m sorry to tell you this, but we’re not going to—”

 

“We’re not going to let the babe get spoiled, just loved,” Loki said firmly. “Which is where you excel, brother. You will make a fine uncle.”

 

Thor beamed and then looked at his mother, who had a delighted look on her face. “Happy to see your sons getting on so well, Mother?”

 

“Of course, dear. That’s _exactly_ what I’m so happy about.” She grinned at Loki, and he held out his hand to her. When she gripped it, she felt him slip a little glass vial into her palm. She threw her arms around Loki and held him for a long time. She murmured something in his ear, and Loki nodded. She then turned back to Thor.

 

“Shall we return to Asgard, dear?”

 

“Yes, Mother. Farewell, all. I’ll be seeing you soon.” With that, Thor led Frigga away to make their departure.

 

Tony had heard Loki’s words, had watched the exchange between Loki and Frigga,  but he still wasn’t sure of Loki’s intentions. He doubted Loki would tell Thor if he still meant to terminate the pregnancy. He turned the dark-haired god to face him. “Loki. The potion. Did you give it back?” He was afraid to hear the answer, but he had to know for certain. 

 

Loki grimaced scornfully. “Of course I did, idiot. Your wretched spawn saved my life. I suppose I owe it the same courtesy.”

 

Tony hadn’t felt so happy and excited since he made his first successful flight in the Iron Man suit. _“Yes!”_ he hissed to himself, along with a triumphant fist pump. He grabbed Loki in a tight hug. “I love you, baby. Don’t worry, everything’s going to be fine, everything’s going to work out, you wait and see.” He pulled back and met Loki’s skeptical eyes with a solemn expression. “Trust me. I’m Iron Man.”

 

*******

 

By now, Fury had seen to dispersing everyone except Coulson, Loki and Tony. “Will you see these two out, please?” he asked the agent.

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

Fury left, closing the hallway door behind him. Couldon was standing to the side, arms crossed over his chest, his eyes on Loki.

 

Loki raised an eyebrow. “Yes?”

 

“Forgive my staring. It’s just... you’re a guy. But, you’re pregnant.”

 

Loki cleared his throat. “Yes. It’s... complicated.”

 

“I imagine so. Well—good luck. Come on, I’ll take you up to ground level.” Coulson gestured toward the elevator, but noticed Loki giving him an appraising look. “Something wrong?”

 

“You must have been disappointed that Odin decided to spare my life,” Loki said coolly.

 

“No, that’s not true.” Coulson shrugged. “I never want to see anyone die, not even you.” He paused a moment, holding Loki’s gaze. “Gosh, you really see the worst in people, don’t you?”

 

“He used to, and with good reason. But, things are getting better,” Tony said softly. “Aren’t they, babe?”

 

Loki gave him a small smile. “Can we go home now?”

 

Tony took out his phone. “Yes, absolutely. I’m calling Happy to come pick us up.”

 

Coulson escorted them to the outside exit and watched them get in Tony’s Rolls.

 

A placid look crossed his face. 

 

It was strange, given everything that Loki had done. But, he really hadn’t wanted him to die. He’d gone into custody without a fight, and he apparently hadn’t been planning on attacking the Earth, killing Stark, or doing anything else to cause trouble. No one’s life had ended, so that made it a pretty good day.

 

He knew Loki had been punished back on Asgard, and subsequently rehabilitated—Coulson hoped he could one day speak with him about that. Perhaps there were things his world could teach his own. He idly laid a hand over the scar he’d been left with after his previous encounter with Loki and thought of the difference between dealing with him on that day and today. Whatever they’d done to heal him must have been successful, so that was a good thing.

 

Plus, it sounded like his anti-magic invention had worked after all. 

 

Yes. A really good day, all in all.

 

He headed back to his desk with a bit of spring in his step. 

 

He had a report to write.

 


	18. Awkward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ah, the fluff begins.

Once Happy had negotiated the Rolls into the busy city traffic, both Tony and Loki sat back, sighs of relief rolling out of them like harsh gusts of wind. They glanced at each other, and a smirk came over Loki’s tired face.

 

“Oh, Stark—what the hell did you think you were doing? Did you really think you could shame Odin into not killing me?”

 

Tony grinned. “Hey, it was worth a shot. Plus, your mom was right there. I was banking on her to back me up.”

 

“Mm. That could have gone either way, you know. Luckily, she seems to like you.”

 

“What’s not to like? I’m rich, cuddly, and remarkably cute. And, besides, I’m her grandkid’s daddy.”

 

Loki chuckled appreciatively. “I can’t dispute that you are all of that.”

 

“I’m smart, too.”

 

“That, I question.”

 

Tony loved the way genuine amusement transformed the severe angles of Loki’s face into soft hills and valleys. Making Loki laugh, really laugh, wasn’t easy and every time he did it, he tried to figure out the secret, like deconstructing a magician’s trick, so that maybe—one day—he’d be able to do it at will. “So, Shakespeare. Am I finally allowed to get excited about this?” He reached over to fondly pat Loki’s tummy.

 

Loki looked down at his still-flat stomach. “I don’t know if excitement is the appropriate response, but yes. In a matter of months, you’re going to be a father. To _what_ remains to be seen.”

 

Tony made a dismissive noise. “It’ll be fine. Kid’s only half Jotun, how blue could he be? We’ll just tell people he’s got a skin condition.” The matter being settled to Tony’s satisfaction, he settled back and gazed out the window, utterly relaxed.

 

Loki shook his head. “You know, you rival my brother for sheer idiocy. The two of you should start a fraternal organization, ‘Men of Stupidly Good Cheer.’ And, am I to infer that you really believe the creature to be male? There’s no basis for that assumption at this early stage.”

 

“Quit calling my kid a creature, and yeah, I have a feeling it’s a boy, but that’s just based on the fact that Stark men tend to produce a lot of boys. I have a bunch of cousins on my dad’s side, and only a few of them are girls.”

 

Loki smiled slyly. “Well, keep in mind that, in this case, it’s not necessarily either/or. It could be both.” Seeing Tony’s self-satisfied demeanor shift to acute discomfort pleased Loki greatly. Now it was his turn to easily settle back and watch the traffic whizz by as Tony stewed.

 

*****

 

They arrived at Stark Tower and Tony gave Loki’s knee a squeeze. “We’re home, babe. And, you know what I want to do to you?” he asked in a silky lilt.

 

Loki raised an eyebrow. “What?”

 

Tony scooted closer and looked deeply into Loki’s eyes. “I want to take you up to the bedroom and get you undressed...” Tony leaned in for a kiss. “...lay you down...” Kiss. “...and make sure you have a good...” Kiss. “...long...” Kiss. “... _nap.”_

 

Loki’s eyes sparkled appreciatively. “Oh, my. You do say the most charming things. Unfortunately, the last time I saw your bedroom, there was a gaping hole where the window used to be and a coating of glass shards all over the floor.”

 

A look of supreme irritation crossed Tony’s face. “Ugh. Damn SHIELD, their methods are so inelegant. I’ll call in a work order. Oh, and by the way? It’s _our_ bedroom now. Right?” 

 

“Uh—yes, of course.” Loki actually sounded a little sheepish. Damn. He wasn’t even close to being accustomed to using terms like “we” and “home” and “ours.” It had been so long since he’d even thought of anything other than a few scraps of clothing as being “his.” It was a bit overwhelming.

 

They got out of the car and, reflecting that it was a good thing he’d had the foresight to stock up on replacement window panels after being thrown out of one by his now-boyfriend, Tony put in a clean-up and repair order. “There. Come on, hot stuff, we can hang out in the den and watch the game while that’s being taken care of. And, you need to eat something—I’m going to get you a snack, and then you can sleep on the couch until dinner.”

 

“All right.” The feeling of being overwhelmed continued; Loki wasn’t used to being managed, and there was an oppositional little spark in him that threatened to rise up and say “Don’t tell me what to do!” but he was so exhausted, he didn’t even bother with a snarky remark. He just allowed himself to be led to the leather couch where Tony gestured for Loki to get comfortable. He disappeared and then returned with a bag of cookies and two glasses of milk, which he placed on the coffee table. He sat down and grabbed a cookie, with Loki eyeing him suspiciously.

 

“What are these... things?”

 

“Chips Ahoy. None better, at least in the pre-packaged chocolate chip cookie industry.”

 

Loki took one, experimentally bit off a mouthful, and chewed. “Tastes like chocolate-flavored cardboard.”

 

“Mm.”

 

“Is this in any way nutritious?”

 

“I doubt it. Dip it in the milk and prepare to be wowed.”

 

Loki did so and sampled the effect. “Soggy cardboard.”

 

“Your palette just hasn’t been developed yet. You probably have to start eating these in kindergarten to fully appreciate them.”

 

“What’s kindergarten?” Loki asked idly as he examined the dripping cookie. Tony stared at him.

 

“Are you serious?”

 

Loki shrugged. “Yes—I’ve heard the term, but only in passing. What is it?”

 

“It’s... school. For little kids. You know, cutting paper with plastic scissors, eating paste.”

 

Loki’s eyes widened. “That’s scandalous. This is how Midgardians educate their young?” he asked in disgust.

 

“Well, that’s just part of it. I mean, you learn the alphabet, counting to ten, you get to draw and color, and—”

 

“Tony Stark, I’ll have you know our child will be creating illuminated manuscripts by the age of four, and factoring complex mathematical equations by the time he’s five, if that’s the sort of thing that passes for academic excellence in this realm. However, he _should_ be receiving training in swordsmanship and battle strategy at that age. He most assuredly will not be eating _paste.”_

 

“How about Play-Doh?”

 

_“What?”_

 

Tony dissolved into a wave of chuckles. “Oh, man. And you keep calling it a creature. Look at you, you already think he’s a super-genius!”

 

Loki wore a decidedly cross expression, but after a moment it softened into a self-deprecating grin. “All right, all right. I suppose I have already grown a bit fond of the little... whatever the hell it is.”

 

Tony clamped his hand on Loki’s. “Good. That’s something we have in common. Now, try not to be too disappointed if he turns out to be just a regular-type genius, like me.”

 

Tony’s upbeat attitude was hard to resist, and Loki found himself imagining a little boy with dark curly hair charmingly reciting the Midgardian alphabet as he thrust and parried a pint-sized sword in mock-battle with his father. He suppressed a chuckle, but then pressed his lips together as he mulled over a new thought. He raised his eyes to meet Tony’s. “I suppose you’re right. We’ll have to temper our desires and expectations for him with reason and understanding.” He then dropped his gaze to his hands. “I know full well how difficult it is to be constantly falling short in parental eyes. I don’t want that for our child.”

 

“Atta boy. Listen, you’re going to be a great dad, and so am I. At least we know a lot of the stuff _not_ to do.”

 

“That’s for certain.”

 

“There now, see? Quit worrying. You need to relax, rest up.” He pulled Loki to him and rubbed his back. “Poor kid. You must be worn out.”

 

Loki rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help but give in to the comforting touch of Tony’s hands and the alluring warmth of his body. As infuriating as it was to find himself needing this, he couldn’t deny it—he bloody well _needed_ this, and from now on, he was going to take full advantage any time he had the chance. He eagerly snuggled in, lying with his head in Tony’s lap, perfectly happy to allow himself to be petted and stroked like a cat for as long as Tony was willing to do so. “I am. This is nice, Tony. And, I believe I’ll try for that nap now.” 

 

“Will it bother you if I turn on the TV?”

 

“No. I could sleep through Ragnarok at this point.”

 

“Through what?”

 

“Nothing, nothing.” He closed his eyes, his body feeling like it might sink into the couch like a rock at any moment, and tried to fall asleep. But frustratingly, even with Tony drawing lazy patterns on his back, he couldn’t. There were too many warring thoughts in his head, too much to sort out, too many unknowns. He shifted restlessly and Tony muted the sound on the television.

 

“Hey, what’s wrong? Can’t turn off?”

 

Loki sat up and irritably ran a hand through his hair. “No.”

 

Tony pulled him close. “Worried about tonight?” he asked sympathetically.

 

“Tonight?” 

 

“Yeah, when Pep and Banner come over.”

 

“Oh! I’d forgotten all about that. No, I’m not worried.” Worry was for when you didn’t know the outcome of a situation. Loki knew perfectly well what would happen when those two arrived—they’d join together in berating Tony for his stupidity in getting mixed up with one such as himself, and then pull every trick in the book to try to change Tony’s mind, to get him to doubt himself, to doubt Loki, and... Well, maybe there _was_ something to worry about after all. Banner was Tony’s good friend-in-arms, and the Potts woman clearly had a profound relationship with him that might well have had a romantic basis at one time, if it didn’t still, and without the use of his magic...

 

Wonderful. Just what he needed, one more thing he couldn’t control.

 

His thoughts were interrupted by JARVIS’s voice intoning, “Sir? The repair and clean-up has been completed in the master bedroom. It is now safe for habitation.”

 

Tony looked up. “Great! Thanks, J.”

 

Loki made some quick projections in his head. Tony would be better able to face a two-pronged attack on his choice of life-mate if he’d recently received suitable attention in the bedroom, and since Loki didn’t foresee himself drifting into slumber any time soon, he might as well lure him into some erotic shenanigans. After all, it would be just as easy to massage Tony’s ego as his prostrate, if he was so inclined. He gave Tony a bright smile. “Tony, I think I’d like to stretch out on the bed and get comfortable, if you don’t mind.”

 

“Sure, great idea. I’ll call you when it’s time for dinner.” Tony sipped his milk, not taking his eyes off of the television.

 

Loki sidled closer. “Come with me?” he asked softly, running a finger down Tony’s chest.

 

The seductive undertone managed to penetrate Tony’s football-clouded brain. He looked at Loki and blinked. “Uh... Huh? Oh! Well, I’d love to, but, don’t you need to rest?”

 

“I’m far too agitated for that.” Loki leaned in and gave Tony a heated, possessive kiss, dropping his hand onto the front of Tony’s trousers and giving him a little squeeze. “Come on. I need something to take my mind off earlier events, and I’ve noticed that you know how to provide a very good diversion.”

 

“Such a smooth talker.” Tony kissed back, and then let Loki pull him to a standing position. “Okay, but after? You really do have to get some sleep,” he said, casting one last longing look at the TV before dutifully following Loki to the bedroom.

 

“Oh, I will, once all this anxiousness has been fucked out of me,” Loki answered cheerily. He stripped out of his pajamas and lay down, holding his arms open for Tony to join him. That did the trick; any lingering thoughts of football disappeared from Tony’s mind and he shucked off his clothes and slid into the embrace, happily helping himself to another deep, warm kiss.

 

“You feel warmer when you’re pregnant, you know that?” he asked as he slid a hand down Loki’s back.

 

“Do I? And, you find this favorable?”

 

“It’s nice. Not that the other way wasn’t. It’s just... different.” Tony nibbled under Loki’s ear, biting down on the soft flesh where his neck met his shoulder. That produced a squawk of protest from Loki.

 

“Stop that!” he laughed. “I’m not in the mood for you to leave marks.”

 

“Sorry.” Tony focused his attention on Loki’s nipples, laving and sucking at them, which brought forth a gasp of pleasure. “Like that, do you?”

 

“Uh... yes. By all means, continue.”

 

Tony chuckled, and went back to his play. After he’d teased each small nub into full hardness, he pulled back and regarded Loki’s flat chest curiously. “So, are you going to get tits or what?” 

 

Loki had had his eyes closed in enjoyment, but now they shot open, horrified. _“What?”_

 

“Well, you know. For the kid. I mean, he has to eat, right? How do you—”

 

“Get off of me.” Loki angrily rolled away and flailed around, looking for his clothes. “Go away, I don’t want to talk to you anymore.”

 

“Oh, come on! It was just a question, I’m sorry!” He threw up his hands in a hopeless appeal to the gods of pregnant partners, if there was such a thing. “ _Why does this keep happening?_ I know, I know, I’m an idiot. Hey—” Tony grabbed Loki around the waist just as he was about to slide off the bed and he pulled him into his arms. “Loki, listen to me. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. But you promised you wouldn’t run off when I did something stupid, and yeah, I just said something _incredibly_ stupid, but please, stay. Forget I brought it up. It doesn’t matter—”

 

“It matters to me!” Loki snapped. Stormy eyes stared into loving brown ones for a long moment, and then Tony felt Loki’s tense muscles relax and he slowly let his head drop down to rest against Tony’s shoulder. “Damn it, Tony. It’s too much.”

 

“I know.” Tony caressed him, running his fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up, uh, weird stuff. Don’t know what made me say that.”

 

Loki sighed. “Oh, it’s all right. You’re just being practical. It’s only that... _that_ particular eventuality hadn’t even occurred to me yet. I haven’t had a moment to consider all the changes about to take place in my body, and I’m utterly unprepared to deal with any of them. It’s a bit... unsettling.”

 

“Well, there’s plenty of time before you have to worry about all that.” He kissed him again, and Loki seemed to cheer up a little. Tony gave him a tentative caress along his side down to the protruding bone of his hip. “We okay?”

 

“Yes.” Loki lay back and they got back to the pleasurable business of making love.

 

To Tony’s surprise, Loki didn’t seem inclined to punish him for his unfortunate question, and was instead rather encouraging and good-natured about Tony taking time to prepare him and spending a lot of time kissing and making out before pushing inside him. He quickly matched Tony’s rhythm, and thrust up to meet Tony’s deep strokes without a single insulting observation about the size of Tony’s penis or his lack of finesse in bringing Loki to orgasm. He even shouted Tony’s name instead of grinding out a string of filthy curses when he came.

 

It was kind of freaky. 

 

Incredibly good, but freaky.

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	19. A Case of Nerves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's thinking too much.

Loki and Tony lay flat on their backs, panting. It took them both a moment to come down from their post-orgasmic high, but once they did, they scrambled toward each other and Loki wrapped himself around Tony, burrowing into his neck and pressing his body snugly against his. For someone who claimed not to be a cuddler, Loki seemed to be taking his cue from an octopus, and Tony had to fight to refrain from chuckling out loud. Instead, he gave him a tight hug and kissed his forehead, loving that the man who had previously been so determined to hold him at arm’s length both physically and emotionally, was now happy to revel in being close to him.

He felt like he’d managed to tame a wild animal without losing a limb.

Tony lay there, fascinated by how tangibly Loki’s body slipped from the state of erotic excitement into a calm, deep sleep. He could hear his breath even out and feel his heartbeat slowing. After several quiet minutes, Loki was completely out, and Tony felt peace come over him in a way that he was rarely treated to. He could easily have joined his boyfriend in slumber, but he had a flash of Pepper’s face back at SHIELD headquarters, followed by the thought of Bruce turning into the green guy, and serenity was quickly driven from his mind.

He carefully disentangled himself from Loki’s arms and legs and slid a pillow in his stead before slipping off of the bed and standing up. He turned to look at Loki, wondering how and when trust had finally solidified between them. When was it exactly that Loki became willing to lie down and sleep beside Tony? Naked and vulnerable, it was an act of intimacy on par with consensual sex. More so, really—Tony had had loads of casual sex without a second thought, but sleeping with someone? That wasn’t something he entered into lightly. How much more difficult must it have been for Loki, wild creature that he was.

Tony pulled up the blanket and covered him. Loki frowned slightly, but just hugged the pillow more tightly, apparently undisturbed. A thought occurred to Tony, and he went to rummage in his closet. It took some searching, but there it was—high on a back shelf, still in the dry cleaning bag he’d brought it home in a few years ago—his childhood teddy bear, Bixby, well-loved and well-worn. It had been nearly as tall as he was when he was a toddler, and he’d taken it everywhere, dragging it behind him, sleeping on top of it, talking to it, an endless source of stability and comfort in a household filled with stress, uncertainty, and tension. He hadn’t saved a lot of stuff from his youth, didn’t want the memories, but somehow he’d held on to Bixby from move to move, just throwing him, dusty and dirty, into a box along with whatever else he felt the need to bring along. 

But when Stark Tower was complete, he decided to clean him up in the interest of preserving him for... what? 

Really, what for? He imagined he might claim it was for posterity, something for his future biographers (and no doubt there would be many) to latch onto, proving he did indeed have a sweet side to him, but in reality, he thought he probably meant to hand it down to... someone. Okay, a kid, maybe. His kid. Not that he thought he’d ever have one. But maybe... And, here he was, with fatherhood just around the corner. He looked at the cute furry face, black button eyes staring back at him from under the thin plastic. He tore it away, fluffed up the bear and held it out for inspection. In spite of the ragged bow tie and faded-with-age brown fur, he was still in pretty good shape. Grinning, Tony strode back to his bedside.

He carefully lifted Loki’s arm and lay the bear on top of the pillow. He then slid the pillow away and replaced Loki’s arm. The god instinctively curled in on it, looking choir-boy innocent with a bare shoulder peeking out from under the cover and the bear’s placid expression peering back at Tony from under Loki’s chin. Pretty damn cute.

And then, Tony grabbed his phone and took a picture. Lots of pictures.

After all, he wasn’t a sorcerer. A mere mortal needs some kind of weapon against a god, right? Nothing like a little blackmail material for future reference.

Tony cheerfully headed off to take a shower and to dress for dinner.

******

After a series of escalating knocks, Bruce Banner stood quietly in front of Pepper’s door, waiting to escort her to the cab waiting to take them to Tony’s place. It took a while, but she finally answered. Bruce smiled—she was so damn pretty—ready to say something inane about the weather, but Pepper’s expression told him that pleasantries really weren’t in order. She gave him a curt nod of acknowledgement and immediately headed to the cab. Bruce trailed along behind her, the misgivings he’d been struggling with all afternoon becoming even stronger.

Once they were on the road, Bruce cleared his throat. “Uh, Pepper? I don’t know if this is such a good idea.”

Pepper had been staring out the window, but now she turned to look at him. “What?”

Bruce pursed his lips, considering his words carefully. “Look. This has been a tough day. A lot of emotional stuff, stress, confusion... Maybe we should call Tony and postpone our dinner. Give us a chance to, you know, think things through.” 

“I’ve done plenty of thinking, thank you. Nothing I have to say is going to change, not tomorrow or the next day or the next, and Tony’s just going to get in deeper and deeper. There’s nothing to be gained by waiting, trust me.”

“Yeah... I know you’re pretty upset with Tony, we both are—” Actually, Bruce wasn’t particularly upset with Tony. He was about seventy-five percent worried that Loki was crafting another elaborate scheme to take over the planet, now that SHIELD was more or less out of the way, and twenty percent curious about the whole pregnant-male thing, plus about five percent pissed that Tony hadn’t confided in him, although, to be fair, he could kind of understand that. “...but, I’d hate for us to say things in the heat of the moment that we might end up regretting.”

Pepper then turned her full attention on him. “I’m not upset, Bruce, I’m terrified. This whole thing stinks of schemes, lies, and deception, which are exactly the things Loki excels at. He’s got powers, right? Maybe it’s magic, or maybe it’s just some kind of mind control, but whatever’s going on between him and Tony is not normal.”

“Um... What do you mean?”

“For starters, Tony isn’t gay. Oh, I’m not naive enough to believe he’s never experimented, maybe even a lot, but he’s way too into women to go that way full-time. Second, Tony’s got relationship issues. He’s had a million infatuations, but falling in love? Hell, he couldn’t commit to a goldfish. Third, I don’t believe for one minute that Loki’s pregnant. It’s bullshit. Clever, all right, but where’s the proof? He’s brainwashed Tony, maybe his whole family, Thor and everyone. He’s got something terrible planned, and he’s using Tony to make it happen, I know it.” She pulled her handbag closer to her and went back to staring out the window.

Bruce shrugged. “Well, it all does seem pretty wild. But, Tony’s not stupid, how could he fall for a scheme like that?”

“Again, mind control. Look what he did to Selvig and Hawkeye. You don’t think Tony’s susceptible? That’s why I have to talk to him, I have to look him in the eye and see what the hell’s going on in his head. I think if we can have a few minutes alone, I can get through to him.”

“And you don’t think Loki will interfere with that?”

“Of course he will. Which is where you come in. I’ll need you to run interference.”

Bruce’s eyes widened. “Ahem, may I call your attention to my alter ego, the big green guy? I trashed Tony’s place once before, wiping up the floor with Loki. I really don’t want to be put in the position of having to do that again.”

“You won’t. I just need you to keep him busy. You can, I don’t know, say you want to apologize to him for embedding him in concrete the hard way, or talk to him about baby names, or ask him to teach you a card trick, I don’t care. I just need you to distract him for a few minutes while I talk to Tony.”

Bruce nodded. “I get it. Now, what’s going to happen if you do manage to convince Tony that Loki’s using him?”

Pepper gave him a dour look. “Then, we may need the green guy.”

*****

Loki was in a dream state. He could feel the child within him thrashing around like a trapped animal wanting out. He was calling desperately for Tony, but he was nowhere to be found. Then, he could see someone in the distance running toward him. But when the figure got closer, it was Odin. He was laughing maniacally and as he neared, he raised his spear. “Don’t worry, son! I’ll help you!” He threw the spear, and just as it was about to pierce Loki’s stomach, he startled awake. He was breathing heavily and it took him a moment to grasp where he was and to accept that there was no danger. As his eyes focused, he found himself face-to-face with a soft fuzzy brown creature. He gasped, ready to throw it across the room, until he realized it must be some sort of toy. 

He sat up and examined it. There was a tag proclaiming “FAO Schwartz” with the name “Tony” neatly embroidered over it. A smile tugged at Loki’s lips. Ah. A childhood memento, then. Why was it in his arms? Of course, Tony must have gotten up and, not wanting to disturb him, gave him something to hold... But, why this, this... whatever this thing was supposed to represent? Loki gave it a critical look. Dog, maybe? No, it was hard to say. Asgardian children had stuffed toys meant to look like animals, Loki had had an elephant called Beryl, but those were typically made of silk and carefully crafted to be as life-like as possible. This was just a squishy warm thing, rather like a pillow but with arms and legs and little ears and eyes made out of buttons. And, it was rather unexpectedly wearing a bow tie. Loki shook his head and considered following through with the plan to throw it across the room, but then he thought better of it and lay the thing on the bed before standing up.

Ugh. He felt sticky and sweaty, thanks to his and Tony’s earlier exertions. He glanced at the clock and wondered when Tony’s guests—there was no way he could think of them as “their” guests, especially Banner—were expected. He went to take a shower, and as water began to course over his body, the unpleasant dream came back to him. It had left him feeling unsettled, unsure whether there was a meaning to it that he needed to decipher, or whether it was prophetic in some way. He idly rubbed soap over his chest and under his arms and frowned.

So strange that Tony hadn’t been there.

Eh, he was probably just worried about tonight’s dinner. Both Banner and Miss Potts would be decrying his and Tony’s relationship, and he’d have to take it or risk upsetting everyone, especially Tony. It was so unfair. Tony had done nothing but good, and now he was going to be put on trial by his close friends, all because he’d been foolish enough to fall in love with Loki. 

Loki leaned against the cool tile, his stomach suddenly in knots. He knew Tony loved him. It had been hard to believe at first, but now he felt sure and secure that his little Midgardian mate truly cared for him. Which would make it doubly difficult for him to be gracious and kind when his guests began a tirade against Loki. 

And, all Loki would be able to do was stand around and try to look harmless. 

Which he was. 

Not that they’d believe it.

Shit. Loki’s eyes widened at the thought. Oh, gods, they’d NEVER believe it. Never. No matter how long he and Tony might be together, no matter how well-behaved Loki might be, no matter how good and kind and responsible he might make himself, they’d never trust him.

And, they’d never let Tony forget it.

They’d never let him forget, and they’d make sure every little misstep, every poorly chosen word, every facial expression that could be interpreted as covering a lie, was endlessly discussed and analyzed, and they’d force Tony to make excuses for him, to apologize for him, and at the end of the day, he’d see it—the doubt, the questions, the weariness in Tony’s eyes. And, tonight was only the beginning.

What of the Black Widow? Hawkeye? And, His Righteousness, good ol’ Captain America? 

What would happen when they’d had their turn at Tony, telling him what a fool he was for being duped, for endangering himself, them, the entire city, the country, the planet?

The water was cascading down his back, almost too hot, and a tight tendril of fear closed around Loki’s throat.

What had he done?

He hastily turned off the faucet, and stepped out, grabbing a bath towel. 

Shit. Fuck. It was too late. He’d agreed to have the baby, agreed to stay with Tony, but what if, after tonight, or the next day, or the next, he didn’t want him any more?

Where would he go?   
He pondered the question as he dressed. He could ask Thor to beseech Odin to let him come back to Asgard to birth the child. No one would ever know he was there. There were caves in the south situated by a pristine stream, he and Thor had camped in them many times. It was nearly Asgardian spring and the weather would be mild. There would be plenty of vegetation and good hunting, he could stock up in advance of becoming too ungainly to manage on his own. Frigga would be able to come to him to assist when his time came, and then...

Thor could bring the child to Tony, if he still wanted it. Or, perhaps Frigga would be enchanted with it and raise it as her own. She might even be able to persuade Odin to put a glamour spell on it, if Loki was out of the picture. 

His heart hurt at the thought, but he pushed the pain aside. He was good at that. People thought him cold and unfeeling, but it was just the opposite. If anything, he felt emotions too strongly. He’d grown up careful not to show his dismay when Thor’s friends made fun of him, lest they use his sorrow against him. Instead, he’d learned to do a trick or make a joke, learned to smile when Thor’s exploits earned him admiration and praise, to look proud when Thor’s accomplishments on the battlefield were being celebrated, even though he’d been right beside him, warding him in safety, distracting the enemy to give Thor a chance to refocus, using sharp strategy to help win the battle, only to be not only overlooked, but mocked for using seidr.

He could hide his feelings now, tamp them down, destroy them. He could leave Tony, leave his child. It—he, or she—would be all right. The child would have no baggage. No one would study its every move, wondering what deception it was up to, or when it would turn on them. 

He just had to make a plan. 

He needed Thor.

******

Loki wasn’t sure how to contact his brother. In the past, Heimdall had been their conduit, but Loki doubted the watcher harbored any kindly feelings toward him now, or even that he would be allowed to give him assistance if he did. Loki wandered around the bedroom, stopping to stare out the newly repaired picture window. He sat down in the recently replaced overstuffed chair and sighed at the thought of all the trouble and expense he’d already put Tony through, whether directly or indirectly, and the thought of it only cemented his plan. His eyes fell on the land line telephone, which he understood was hopelessly outmoded technology now that everyone seemed to carry a tiny device on their person, but beside it there was a sheet of paper with scribbles all over it. He picked it up and saw the name “Thor,” followed by a series of numbers. 

“Hmph,” he said to himself. He was dubious that it would work, but he’d seen this sort of telephone used in plenty of old TV shows, so perhaps it was worth a try; he picked up the handset and put it to his ear. He heard an encouraging hum. He shrugged and punched in the numbers. After a moment, he heard a ringing sound, and then, to his genuine surprise, Thor’s melodious voice came on the line. “Hello?” he said.

“Uh—Thor? Is that you?”

There was what sounded like stunned silence on the other end, but then Thor tentatively said, “Yes. Who’s this?”

“It’s me, Loki.”

More stunned silence. Then a hearty laugh. “Loki! What in the Nine? You’re using a telephone device?”

Loki felt like saying, “Isn’t it obvious, idiot?” but thought better of it, saying, “Um, yes. Strange, isn’t it?” instead.

“It is! But, it’s good to hear your voice. What are you...” The cheer in Thor’s voice dissipated. “Loki, is something wrong?” he asked worriedly.

“Not exactly. But... I need your help.”

“Gods, brother. It’s been an age since I’ve heard those words from you.” Thor’s tone sounded lighthearted, but Loki could hear the concern underneath it. “What do you need?”

Loki took a deep breath as he tried to compose his thoughts. “You know that Bruce Banner and Pepper Potts are coming for dinner tonight, yes?”

“Yes.”

“Then, I’m sure you also know how the evening will go.”

On the other end of the line, Thor frowned. “What do you mean?”

Loki rolled his eyes. “Think about it. They’re not coming here to get to know their friend’s new sweetheart. They’re coming to talk Tony out of being with me.”

“Loki, you mustn’t make such assumptions—”

“It’s not an assumption, it’s a fact.”

“All right, let’s suppose that it is. Do you really think Tony will part with you as a result of their words? He won’t. As difficult as it is for me to believe, he loves you.” Thor spoke teasingly, but the words stung.

“I can assure you, it is no less difficult for me,” Loki snapped. “And, no, I don’t imagine he’d do anything rash this day. But, what about after Natasha Romanoff, Clint Barton, and Steve Rogers have their little chats with him? What about when I make some thoughtless remark or stupid mistake? It’ll all add up, Thor. The day will come when he regrets ever having had anything to do with me, just as everyone else does.”

Thor closed his eyes tiredly. “You’re being ridiculous. Tony won’t fail you. He’s a good, strong man, he’ll answer their fears with the truth and before long, they’ll see you as you really are. As a good, strong man.”

Loki pressed his lips together. “I wish it were that simple. But, it’s not. And I need what is referred to on Midgard as a ‘Plan B.’”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“Thor, I need you to talk to Fa—I mean, Odin. I need you to convince him to let me return to Asgard for a while, just until the baby is born.”

“What? Why?” Thor sounded utterly bewildered.

“If Tony sends me away, I’ll have no way of surviving in this realm while pregnant. On Asgard, I can care for myself until the birth, and then Mother will be near enough to help me.”

“And, then what? Where would you and the child go?”

“I... The child would be in Mother’s hands. If Tony wants it, so be it, she’d see to it that they would be together. Otherwise, she’d make sure it was well-cared for, perhaps even raise it herself. I would then be free to leave and do the work you and I talked about.”

“Loki!” Thor sounded scandalized. “You’d leave your baby?” 

Loki irritably swiped at a tear, and forced his voice not to shake. “It would be best. For it and for me. I have no desire to care for an infant alone. Tony would probably let me... see it occasionally. Of course, if Mother were to take it, well, that would be that. Unless...” There was no helping the tremor in his voice. “Unless, I were to prove myself worthy by helping you. Then, perhaps one day Odin would allow me to visit.”

Thor was quiet for several long moments. When he spoke, it was with the grave manner of a king.

“Loki. You’ve had so little happiness in your life, and now that you’ve found it, you’re determined to push it away with both hands. I will not allow it. You know very well Tony would move mountains for you, and for his child. Do not think he wouldn’t follow you to Asgard, or that I wouldn’t take him right to you. He’d bring you home, kicking and screaming all the way if he had to. So, stop this nonsense and concentrate on making things as easy for him as possible in convincing his friends that he’s not a fool.”

“But—”

“If the day ever comes that you need that sort of help, of course you can depend on me to see it through. But, you won’t.” Thor let that sink in, and then added, “Accept it, brother. You’ve found the one poor soul in the nine realms mad enough to be a match for you. Don’t make it any harder on him than it already is.”

Loki could hear Thor’s grin through the phone line. Slowly, the panicked feeling was ebbing away. He found himself smiling, and he said softly, “Good advice. Another thing you rarely hear me say.”

“Indeed.”

“But, I mean it. Thank you.”

“It’s going to be fine, Loki. Please trust him. He trusts you.”

Loki nodded. “All right. I’ll, uh... let you know how things go. Tonight. Assuming Banner’s green creature doesn’t make an appearance.”

“If that happens, I’ll hear it on the news. Try to be good, though, okay? You’re behaving for two, you know.”

“I know. I will. I’ll be a perfect little angel.”

Thor burst out laughing. “Just try not to piss him off. That’s about the best we can hope for, I suspect.”

Loki laughed in agreement, and then hung up. He leaned back, thinking over everything Thor had said. 

He was just about to go see if he could get a reassuring hug from Tony when JARVIS’s voice announced that Bruce and Pepper had arrived.


	20. Pepper and Loki Have a Chat

Tony left Loki to his nap and went to call in an order of Indian food for four, to be delivered later that evening. He glanced around the living room and supposed he should clean the place up a little. He fluffed a few pillows on the couch, used the corner of his shirttail to wipe away some dust on the coffee table, carried a couple of glasses to the kitchen, and called it good. 

 

Given the colony of butterflies that were making a home in his stomach, he decided to go down to his workshop to putter. That was always soothing, except in cases where there really _was_ something to worry about, something big. In those cases, he’d just double check that his best suit was in working order and ready for anything.

 

Like the clash of a pregnant god and a big green Hulk.

 

Not that he seriously thought it would come to that. These days, Bruce was pretty mild-mannered except under severe duress, and he knew Loki wouldn’t do anything to put their baby at risk. No, if he was the introspective, self-analytical type, he’d admit the truth—he really didn’t want to deal with Pepper. She had always been his touchstone, his rock, his moral compass, and the look in her eyes back at SHIELD headquarters had been devastating. He’d disappointed her, clearly. But it was more than that. She was... scared? Angry? Mistrustful? Sure, and he couldn’t really blame her at all. The trick was to make her _not_ be those things, and that’s where the butterflies came in.

 

Because, he wasn’t sure he could do it.

 

He’d talked his way out of a lot of tight situations in his life, but Pep had a built-in bullshit detector like no other. He knew he couldn’t just schmooze his way out of this. He needed to explain himself, and above all reassure her that his beautiful, sensitive, surprisingly lovable life-mate wasn’t on a psychopathic mission to implode the Earth, or to skewer a few mortals for his own amusement. And that wasn’t going to be easy, because, God bless him, Loki had made a lasting impression on New York City, and not the good kind, either. Plus, he had a tendency to be... snippy when challenged.

 

Soooo... Tony had his work cut out for him this evening. 

 

He mused along until his fingers found an uneven spot on the suit’s face plate and he got out some tools and began grinding it down. Soon he was in a kind of workshop-induced trance, serene and focused, and by the time JARVIS announced the arrival of the evening’s guests, Tony was ready. He was no longer worried about what to do. It all came down to a simple choice—Pepper (and to some extent, Bruce and the other Avengers) or Loki.

 

There was no question in his mind. It would be hard, it would be painful, the consequences would be far-reaching and probably unpleasant. 

 

But, if it came down to it, he knew who he’d pick.

 

Loki. 

 

_Every time._

 

He just hoped Loki knew that. Well, there was no time to confer with him now. Tony would just have to count on Loki’s good sense and... self-esteem? Ugh, the butterflies were back. But, there was no help for it.

 

He looked up at the speaker where JARVIS’s voice lived. “Tell ‘em I’ll meet them in the living room,” he said calmly. He wiped the grease from his hands and headed to the elevator.

 

******

 

A horrible thought occurred to Tony as he rode the elevator up to the living quarters of Stark Towers— _what if Loki met up with Bruce and Pep before he got there?_

 

He suddenly wished he’d put some kind of turbo-charge feature on the elevator that would make it ascend at rocket speed. As it was, he had to stew until the doors opened and he was able to jog to the living room.

 

Which, happily, contained only Bruce and Pep.

 

He took a deep breath and then plastered a slightly manic smile on his face. “Hey, you guys! Long time no see, huh? How are you this evening?” Tony was now in full used-car salesman mode and Pepper rolled her eyes. She crossed her arms and started to say something, but Bruce beat her to it.

 

“Where is he?” he asked flatly.

 

It wasn’t exactly a challenge, but it wasn’t the warmest greeting Tony had ever received. He’d heard cops asking the location of criminal suspects in that same tone.

 

He immediately dropped the fake cheer and walked up to look Bruce in the eye. “His name is Loki,” he said with a note of steel in his voice. “He’s taking a nap, because he’s tired from being pregnant and also because his dad made a quick trip down to Earth so he could execute him. You know how it is, spending time with family. It can really take it out of you.”

 

Bruce looked slightly chastened, but Pepper came up to confront Tony. “We were promised he’d be locked up for the rest of his life. Maybe his dad knew what he was doing, did you ever think of that?”

 

“Loki was punished for what he did to New York. He’s been rehabilitated. What happened at SHIELD was an accident, and—”

 

“He nearly killed a woman!” Pepper snapped.

 

“An _accident,_ and he went on to save her life!” 

 

“He’s a liar, Tony. He’d say anything to get out of trouble, and to keep you blind to his true nature so he can use you to get what he wants.”

 

Tony felt a flare of anger crackle through him and he knew letting that fire come out was the worst thing he could do if he wanted this evening to go even a tiny bit smoothly; after all, it was on the bumpy side already. He forced himself to calm down. 

 

“Look, you wanted an explanation, and I asked you here because I wanted to give you one. Because I felt like you deserved it. But, if your mind’s already made up and you’re not going to listen to what I have to say, there isn’t much point to this. You might as well go home.” He said it as matter-of-factly as he could, and paused to let her know he meant business. Then, he turned conciliatory and put his hands on her shoulders. “But, I hope it doesn’t come to that. Plus, I’ve ordered a shit-ton of Indian food, so please, Pep. Give me a break. Let’s talk.”

 

Pepper closed her eyes, gathering her thoughts. She opened them and gave Tony a searching look. “But how do I know you’re even in your right mind?” she asked softly. “He’s capable of anything. What if he’s in your head right now, doing what he did to Selvig and Hawkeye?” She put a cool hand on Tony’s cheek. “How would you know?”

 

“Hello, humans.” 

 

Tony turned sharply to see Loki standing in the doorway. His words hearkened back to the first time Tony had seen him, post-almost-Apocalypse, wild and regal, standing in his kitchen with potholders and dish towels swirling around his leather-clad form. He’d been mocking and just-this-side of malevolent then, but now... His voice was soft and his expression rueful, as though whatever ill-will he was feeling was directed only at himself.

 

Instead of metal and leather, he was wearing a light green sweater over a white t-shirt and a worn pair of jeans, with red Converse on his feet. Tony had bought all of it for him, but he’d never imagined he’d put together an outfit like that, or that it would all fit him like a dream. His hair was combed back, but it was untamed and a few strands fell softly around his face. He reminded Tony of a young university professor on his way to Starbucks.

 

And, Tony wanted nothing more than to take him in his arms, to protect his God of Mischief from the anger and hostility that was buzzing palpably in the room. But instead he answered, “Hey, babe. Let me introduce you.” He gestured at Bruce. “This is—”

 

“Dr. Banner. We’ve met.” Loki had a tight smile on his face as he ambled up to Bruce. He stuck out his hand. “Under slightly less than harmonious circumstances, I’m afraid.”

 

Bruce hesitated for only a second before shaking Loki’s hand. “Yeah. That was a... rough time.”

 

Loki nodded his agreement, and then his smile turned a little bit wicked. “Of course, that wasn’t our only meeting, you know. We’ve run into each other much more recently than that.”

 

Bruce frowned, puzzled. “We have?”

 

Loki chuckled. “I can’t blame you for not remembering. I looked a bit different. I was wearing a red dress and my hair was blond... I called myself ‘Lola’ that night.” Loki’s voice had taken on a soft Southern lilt and Bruce’s eyes widened as he recalled their previous meeting at the restaurant. 

 

Pepper made a disgusted sound. “Oh, my God. That was _you?”_ She turned to Tony, her eyes glinting with anger. “How can you seriously stand there and tell me you believe anything he has to say? That you trust him?”

 

 _“I_ knew exactly who he was that night.” Tony stoically met Pepper’s bitter gaze as he put his arm around Loki’s waist. “We wanted a quiet dinner together. I told him he needed a disguise—and, let me tell you, this guy doesn’t do anything halfway.” Tony pulled Loki closer and gave him a fond smile. “It was our first date.”

 

“Oh, how nice. Was that when you decided to ‘get pregnant?’” Pepper asked sarcastically.

 

Loki raised his eyes thoughtfully, as if trying to recall exact dates. “Um, no, that was never a conscious decision. At the time, I didn’t even know it was something I could, well, _do._ But, I believe the little beggar was already making itself at home by that point.” He put a hand on his stomach and grinned sheepishly.

 

Pepper huffed and threw her hands up in frustration. _“Really?_ You really expect me—us—to believe this crap? You’re a man, you’re male, you are _not_ pregnant!”

 

Loki gave her a bewildered look. “And why in the name of the Norns would I make a claim like that?” He glanced down at himself and then shot her a look of utter dismay. “You think this is easy? Having everyone think you’re a freak, a joke—or a monster? Trust me, no one would make up a story like this.” 

 

“Then, prove it.”

 

Both Tony and Loki stared at her. Loki tilted his head questioningly. “How?”

 

“This.” Pepper rummaged in her bag and pulled out a rectangular cardboard box. She held it out to Loki.

 

He took it and examined it curiously. “What is it?”

 

Tony sighed. “A pregnancy test.” Tony took the package and tore it open. He held out the test stick.

 

Loki looked slightly horrified. “And, what do you do with that?”

 

“You pee on it.”

 

Loki narrowed his eyes, obviously not believing Tony. He took the box and pulled out the instructions, and after reading them over, he gave a sneer of distaste. “Eww. How repulsive. How does it work?”

 

“When a woman, uh, person, is pregnant, there are specific hormones in their urine  which activate chemicals on the stick, causing them to change color,” Bruce supplied. “Uh... How do they test for pregnancy on Asgard?”

 

Loki glanced at Bruce. “A mage lays hands on the woman’s belly. If pregnant, gold sparks fly out from between her fingers.” He shrugged. “A bit more elegant than peeing on a stick, don’t you think?” he added.

 

“Listen, you don’t want to know how we did it before they figured out the stick thing,” Tony said helpfully.

 

“So, anyway,” Pepper said, trying to get back on track. “If you want us to believe you, take the test.”

 

“Now, wait a minute.” Tony took the package from Loki and returned the stick to the box, and then handed it back to Pepper. “In the first place, I don’t need a damn test to know he’s got my kid growing inside him. I _know_.”

 

“But, _how_ do you know? He’s obviously done something to convince you, but he’s lying, he used you to get SHIELD off his back, and now—”

 

“He’s not the one that told me. His mom—look, I felt the baby’s, what do you call it, life force or whatever. There’s no doubt in my mind about that.”

 

“Then, you shouldn’t be afraid of having him do the test.” Pepper held out the package again.

 

“I’m not afraid. But, these things aren’t always accurate, and who knows whether they work on someone... from another planet. All you need is one false negative result, and you’ll never listen to anything I have to say about Loki again.”

 

“I can’t believe anything now! I—”

 

“Stop.” Loki stepped forward and snatched the test from Pepper’s hands. He turned to look at Tony. “I’ll do it.”

 

A thunderous look came over Tony. _“No.”_ He went to Loki and took the package. “There’s nothing to prove. I know what I felt, and that’s good enough for me.” He turned to Bruce and Pepper. “So, it should be good enough for you, too.”

 

“But, such an idea is so difficult for you mortals to grasp. If this will help to convince them, then let me do it,” Loki said softly.

 

“Wait a few months and we’ll let the baby convince ‘em,” Tony said, pushing aside his anger and smiling at Loki. He took the test stick out of the box and broke it in two, and then tossed it into a waste basket.

 

Loki held his gaze. In that moment, he loved Tony so much he felt his heart would burst. And that was why he had to try, really try, to make Tony’s friends believe him, even though he felt pretty sure it was hopeless, even though in his heart he truly didn’t care whether they believed him or not. He turned to face Bruce and Pepper.

 

“I know that in your world for this to happen to a man is impossible. It is in mine, too. You accuse me of trickery, of lying. Well, as I have only recently discovered, my entire life has been a lie, right down to the very body I inhabit. I don’t expect you to believe me, but the fact is...” Loki gestured at himself. “What you see before you is an illusion. Nothing more than a cheap trick played on you—and me—by the man I thought to be my father. And, even when I learned the truth, I had no reason to believe... to suspect...” Loki took a deep breath as the brutal sting of the Allfather’s deception came over him, as fresh and piercing as it was at the first moment of realization. “I swear, I had no idea this could happen.”

 

“Well, yeah...” Bruce said mildly. “Just the physiology of it alone brings up a lot of questions. I mean, like... How?” A slight blush came over Bruce’s cheeks.

 

Loki glanced uncertainly at Tony. “I am Jotun. From a different realm than Asgard. This form, uh...” He faltered, and suddenly he looked exhausted. Abruptly, he straightened, pulling on his last bit of emotional strength to say with dignity, “I’m sorry. I-I really don’t feel like eating anything tonight. You three enjoy your dinner. I believe I’ll just go to bed. Goodnight.” With that, he turned and strode out of the room.

 

Everyone stared after him.

 

Tony gave Pepper and Bruce a chiding look. “I’m going to go talk to him,” he said and started to walk away. But Pepper grabbed his arm.

 

“Wait. Don’t go. I’ll talk to him.”

 

Tony raised an eyebrow. “You?”

 

“Yeah. I just want to ask him a few questions.” There was an edge to her voice and she locked eyes with Tony. “That’s not a problem, is it? You say you trust him. So, if I go in there alone, there’s nothing to worry about, is there?” 

 

Watching from the side, Bruce wasn’t sure if he should intervene or what. He would have happily headed for home at that point. But, Tony slowly shook his head. “No, there’s not. I’d just appreciate it if you’d treat him with a little respect, that’s all. Even if you don’t think he deserves it.”

 

The hard set of Pepper’s jaw eased and she nodded. “Of course.”

 

Tony shrugged and indicated that Pepper should go.

 

*****

 

Loki headed for the bedroom, closed and locked the door behind him, and sank down on the bed. He absently reached for Bixby and hugged him to his chest. He found some comfort in the soft, friendly fuzziness, but more so in knowing that Tony had taken the trouble to leave it for him. 

 

So many emotions were welling up inside him, he felt as if he might cry. 

 

The Potts woman’s hatred of him was understandable, but accusing him of lying about something he was still mostly in a state of denial about? As if he would _choose_ to have people look at him the way they all had back at SHIELD headquarters? That was bad enough, but having to explain the miserable story of his birth, his so-called father’s deception and the still-unknown workings of his strange Jotun body to the man/beast who had beaten him? It was more than he could bear.

 

He’d thought he could handle it, but it was so much worse than he’d imagined. He wanted Tony to be proud of him, but how could he be when his two close friends, mere mortals, stared at Loki like that? Like he was dirt, something to be gotten rid of, a rat in the attic? He was once a _prince_ , a king, but now he’d been reduced to a circus freak, interesting perhaps, but not someone you’d want to share a meal with.

 

He was suddenly glad he was constrained from using _seidr,_ because if he wasn’t, he‘d be sorely tempted to make Tony’s guests permanently disappear—in a very unpleasant fashion.

 

He couldn’t even conceive of what it would be like the day Romanoff or Barton or Steve Rogers confronted him.

 

Tony’s Avenger friends were warriors, all of them. They’d acted with honor, defending their realm, yet Loki knew that in a time not so long ago, he would have been filled with lust for revenge, for victory. Now, he just felt tired. Now, wretchedly, he wanted their acceptance, for Tony’s sake.

 

But he couldn’t even gain the benefit of the doubt from the blonde woman.

 

He rubbed his eyes and started to lie down when a knock came at the door. He groaned and called, “Please, Tony. I don’t want to see anyone. Just leave me alone.”

 

“It’s me, Pepper. I want to talk to you.”

 

Loki shot a look at the door. Well, this was interesting. The girl had spirit, all right; she reminded him a bit of Sif. And if she was anything like the lady warrior, he doubted she’d take no for an answer. Suddenly cheered by the thought of a bit of verbal sparring, Loki got up and went to the door, opening it a crack. He drew himself up to his full height and imperiously ordered, “Go away, woman, I’ve no use for you. Leave me to my solitude.” There was a moment of silence on the other side of the door, and Loki had to squelch a snicker. 

 

He wanted to see what she’d do.

 

The god’s harsh tone took Pepper aback, but she quickly rebounded. “No,” she snapped defiantly. “I thought you wanted to explain yourself. Well, I have a couple of questions. Open up, it’ll only take a minute.” She crossed her arms and stood pat.

 

Loki smirked to himself and then opened the door all the way. He dropped his haughty attitude and leaned against the door frame, regarding her with a raised eyebrow and rakish grin. “Aren’t you afraid I might do something untoward? I’m dreadfully hormonal and you _are_ quite beautiful, I might not be able to restrain myself,” he said teasingly.

 

Pepper snorted. She’d never been face-to-face with the guy, and now, standing mere inches away from him, she couldn’t help noticing he was so damn... _tall._ And, good-looking. With an aura of venom and power about him that he didn’t seem to be trying to disguise. It was a little disconcerting, but she refused to be intimidated, and she put on a show of bravado. “Yeah, I’m afraid all right, I’m afraid for Tony, and for our planet, but I’m not afraid of _you._ Now, are you going to let me in, or are we going to have this conversation with me standing here in the hallway like an idiot?”

 

Loki gave a mockingly deferential half-bow. “How unhospitable of me, I wouldn’t dream of it. Please, come in.” He made a grand sweep of his hand and stepped aside to let Pepper enter. She walked in a little way and then stood uncertainly, glancing around the room. Loki went to the bed and picked up Bixby.

 

“Do you have any idea what this thing is supposed to be?” he asked, holding the toy up inquisitively.

 

Pepper blinked at the question. Two seconds, and this was already going in a weird direction. She didn’t like it. “It’s a teddy bear. What in the world are you doing with it?”

 

“Teddy bear? Hmm. I’ve studied Midgardian wildlife at some length, I’ve never heard of that particular species. Is it anything like a grizzly, or a—”

 

“It’s just a stuffed bear, we call them ‘Teddy’ because one of our presidents, Theodore Roosevelt, was known for hunting big game, and—damn it, why are we talking about this?”

 

“Tony placed it in my arms while I was sleeping. I was only trying to decipher its significance.”

 

“Ha. I bet he took a picture. He’s probably going to use it to blackmail you at some point.” Pepper took another harried look around the room.

 

Honestly surprised, Loki nodded. “Oh! Well, that makes sense. He’s smarter than he looks.” Loki smiled fondly and put the bear back on the bed. “Come, let’s sit down.” He headed for the seating area by the window and waited until Pepper had chosen a chair before sitting down himself. “Now, what did you want to ask me?”

 

Pepper was now seriously reconsidering her decision to confront the god. At the very least, he was confusing the hell out of her, but she pulled herself together and went for it. “Okay, I’m not going to dance around the issue. Just tell me the truth—why are you even here? What the hell are you planning? And, how does Tony fit in?”

 

Loki laughed softly, seeming to marvel at her words. “My goodness. You think I’m so clever, don’t you?”

 

Pepper didn’t answer, nor did she drop her gaze. Loki ruefully shook his head.

 

“Well, I wish I _were_ that clever. But, I’m not, and that’s the point. Tony’s seen me for what I am, in all my weakness and need and foolishness. And yet, he seems to... care for me. I want that, Miss Potts. And I’ll do anything necessary to protect it.”

 

Pepper’s eyes narrowed and she leaned forward. “Is that a threat?”

 

Loki stared at her coolly, apparently giving the question deep consideration. But instead of answering, he responded with, “Are you in love with him?”

 

Pepper’s eyes widened and she huffed indignantly. “No! What kind of a question is that! Of course not.”

 

Loki regarded her, a sly grin tugging at his lips. “Oh, Miss Potts. Who’s the liar now?”

 

Pepper forced a neutral expression onto her face, but the way she gripped the arms of the easy chair wasn’t lost on Loki. He waved a hand dismissively. “All right, apologies, I withdraw the question. Emotions are subjective. But _facts_ are irrefutable—at the very least, you shared his bed at one time, did you not?” 

 

A shocked “Wh-what?” slipped from Pepper’s lips.

 

“When? For how long? What happened, why did it end?”

 

“I... You... _Did Tony tell you—?_ How _dare_ he!”

 

“Ah. His decision to part, then.”

 

Pepper was regaining steam. “Whatever happened between me and Tony is none of your business.”

 

“Oh, it rather is. They say, health-wise, you sleep with everyone your partner has ever slept with—what if you have some sort of communicable disease? Don’t I have the right to know, especially since I’m expecting his child?” Loki peered at her with wide, innocent eyes.

 

“I don’t have any disease! You are a goddamn, low down, motherf... Ugh, damn it!” Pepper sat back, disgusted with herself for losing her temper. She was beginning to see how Tony could be intrigued with this... character, they must spend hours baiting each other. She stewed for a moment, avoiding looking at Loki. Infuriatingly, she heard him chuckle.

 

“It’s fine if you don’t want to tell me, I’m not subject to your Midgardian ills anyway. I was just curious if you’d admit it.”

 

_“I don’t have a disease!”_

 

“I meant the affair. And, no, Tony’s never said a word, I deduced it for myself. And, to answer your earlier question—” Loki leaned forward, his eyes suddenly sparking with deviltry, all good humor fading. “No, Miss Potts, there is no threat. But do not think for a moment that I feel the need to convince you of anything. I don’t give a _shit_ what you or anyone else on this wretched planet thinks of me. If you were all to disappear, shrieking in a vat of molten lava, I would be fine with watching your skin melt away from your bones. But, that would make Tony... sad.” Loki sneered disdainfully. “So, I would like to make a bargain with you.”

 

“A _bargain?_ You’ve got to be kidding!”

 

“Oh, no, I’m quite serious. Now, here is my offer—first, I will afford you all the respect and civility I can muster while in Tony’s presence, and you will do the same for me. And, secondly, you pretend to believe everything you’ve been told about the baby, about how learning the truth about my origins brought me to madness and how I so deeply regret it all, blah blah blah, and about my being rehabilitated. I don’t care whether you actually believe any of it or not. But, you make Tony believe that you do.”

 

Pepper looked as if she might combust, but she composed herself enough to ask,  “And, what will you do in return?”

 

“I will not leave him.”

 

_“Huh?”_

 

“However difficult it may be for you to understand, I make Tony happy. He wants me, and he wants this child. But, if he is forced to choose between me and you, between me and the other people he cares for, I will not stay. I will not bring him sorrow and shame and... regret.” By now, Loki was breathing heavily and although he turned his face away to stare out the window, Pepper could see tears in his eyes. “I would go. And, you, then, would be left with that burden. The burden of being the one who drove me away. Think about it, Miss Potts. Is that what your love for Tony buys you? His resentment—forever?”

 

Pepper sat back, taking it all in. “I’m not the only one who doesn’t trust you.”

 

Loki laughed bitterly. “No, I daresay there’s an entire legion that shares your misgivings. But, you’re the only one Tony’s ever been in love with.”

 

A stunned grimace crossed Pepper’s face. _“What?”_

 

“Oh, please. Did you seriously think Tony left you because he didn’t care? No, no—it was because he cared so much. He returned from Afghanistan a changed man. He was drinking heavily. He was embarking on a new life as Iron Man, risking death over and over again. He knew he’d break your heart eventually. He didn’t want to do that to you, to leave you broken. So, he made it so that the essence of your relationship could stay intact. A small hurt then to ensure a better future for you. _Because_ he loves you. That’s how good of a man he is.”

 

Pepper sat back and now it was her turn to stare out the window. They were both quiet for a long time. Finally, Pepper said softly, “And, now he loves you.”

 

“M-m. I’m what he thinks he deserves. And, I’m just low enough to take advantage of that. You’re right about me, Miss Potts, but not in the way you think you are. I _am_ a liar, a trickster. I’ll do anything, be pleasant, polite, even fucking _charming,_ to people who despise me, but no longer to... gain a throne. I do it for his sake, to make him happy. So that he’ll want me.” Loki met Pepper’s eyes, and somehow, for the first time, she didn’t doubt his words. Loki closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “How pathetic is that?” he said, almost to himself.

 

Pepper cleared her throat. “Well, I... You’ve got some nerve, mister. There’s a goddamn Hulk out there, you think you can charm _him?_ And Natasha and Steve and Clint?” She laughed, not unkindly. “Well. I agree to your bargain. I just hope you live long enough to carry it out.” She rose and smoothed her hair out of her eyes, letting the pent-up tension drain out of her.

 

Loki was somewhere else in his mind, but at her light-hearted tone, he looked up and gave a tentative smile. “I’ll be all right. I _am_ a god, you know.” 

 

JARVIS’ voice came over the speaker. “Mr. Loki, Miss Potts—Mr. Stark wishes to inform you that dinner has arrived.”

 

“Thanks, J. We’ll be right there.” Pepper returned Loki’s smile. “Come on. Let’s go eat.”

 

Loki hesitated a moment, and then stood up. “All right. I am getting a bit peckish. The little one demands to be fed.” He absently ran a hand over his stomach.

 

Pepper gave Loki’s tummy a look and then she seemed to study his face. “You really believe you’re pregnant, don’t you?” she asked finally.

 

The tired expression came over Loki. “If I’m not, this has been a hell of a couple of months for nothing.” He met her gaze and after a moment, they both grinned. Pepper opened the door and headed for the living area, followed by Loki.

 

Tony was waiting in the dining area, the food already on the table. He glanced from Pepper to Loki with an anxious expression. “Well? Everything okay?”

 

Pepper gave him an exaggeratedly dour look. “You’re insane,” she announced before sitting down next to Bruce.

 

Tony pulled Loki aside. “What happened? What’d she say? What did _you_ say?”

 

“Everything is fine. Miss Potts and I have come to an understanding.” He leaned in and kissed Tony. “She’s a very reasonable woman.”

 

Tony turned and flashed a happy grin at Pepper. “Well, great! That’s fantastic.” He led Loki to the table where they took a seat beside each other and Tony pulled Loki in for a hug. “I’m really happy to hear you two managed to smooth things over, babe. After all, we’re going to need a babysitter eventually. I’d hate for you and Pep to be on bad terms.”

 

 _“Babysitter?”_ Pepper exclaimed. “Good lord, Tony, he’s not—” 

 

Loki gave her a sharp look. Pepper caught herself. “I mean, yeah. Sure, I look forward to it. You know how I love kids...”

 

She settled back, feeling as much confusion as ever, but with it, a soft feather touch of hope. Maybe things weren’t as bad as she’d imagined; as she picked up her fork she stole a glance at Loki. He nodded at her, and she was pretty sure she saw a bit of gratitude in his eyes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	21. Dinner, and What Came After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dinner goes well, and Tony and Loki think they've got a nice evening ahead of them. They kind of do, mostly.
> 
> *****

Well, it was interesting.

Which is to say, it wasn’t interesting at all.

Which was interesting.

Tony sat at the dinner table, trying to concentrate on a really lovely plate full of tandoori chicken and saag paneer, but he found himself surreptitiously watching the interchange between Bruce, Pepper, and Loki instead, his eyes darting back and forth as if he were watching a tennis match. Everyone had started off the meal in awkward silence, busying themselves with passing around take-out containers and filling their paper plates with food. Then, Loki asked for a rundown on what each dish consisted of, and Bruce had launched into an enthusiastic discourse on Indian regional cuisine, something he had very much enjoyed on his recent travels, and which he now had taken to making for himself. 

Loki had listened politely and then asked Pepper if she, too, enjoyed cooking, and Pepper had given him a fairly blank look before shrugging and nodding slightly. Bruce had said, “Oh, Italian food is Pepper’s forte,” and then Loki asked for some examples of her specialities. Before long, the three of them were deep in a discussion of their favorite home-cooked meals, with Loki describing some Asgardian delicacies and Bruce reminiscing about the comfort food his mother used to make. Pepper soon warmed to the subject and told them rather excitedly about an import shop where she’d found real Italian balsamic vinegar, and what a difference it had made in her cooking.

By then, they were talking easily, laughing occasionally, and apparently getting along beautifully.

And, Tony was freaked out because, damn—it was just weird. 

And boring.

He’d been prepared to summon his Iron Man suit at a moment’s notice, and instead he was having to concentrate on not falling asleep.

With Loki and Pepper and Bruce Banner at the same table.

It was bizarre...

But interesting.

 

*****

When everyone was finished eating, Pepper cleared her throat and said something like well-hate-to-eat-and-run-it’s-been-lovely-thanks-bye and Bruce didn’t look like he was necessarily ready to leave, but he was clearly eager to accompany Pepper, so he stood up and made his apologies/goodbyes and Loki, yeah, Loki, graciously saw them to the door and told them it had been most enjoyable getting to know them a bit better and to please come again.

And, when he turned around, Tony was standing there, arms crossed, a look somewhere between utter astonishment and total disgust on his face.

“What?” Loki asked uncertainly.

“What the actual fuck do you think you’re doing?” Tony demanded.

“Excuse me? What do you mean?” Loki looked genuinely bewildered. He’d tried his best to avoid trouble, to be not only non-confrontational but good-natured, and he thought he’d done rather well, considering. But Tony’s tone had him second-guessing himself, and his heart sank to think that even when he was doing his damndest to be good, he could still manage to screw things up. “I behaved properly, didn’t I? Did I do something wrong?” he asked, trying to sound scornful and haughty. But he only just managed to keep a note of anxiousness out of his voice instead.

Tony gave him a huff of annoyance. “No! That’s what’s got me freaked—how the hell did we get through an entire meal without so much as a round of name-calling? I used paper plates and plasticware because I was expecting things to get stabby, you know, with the broken glass and the mayhem and the bloodshed—which leaves me with just one question: Who are you and what did you do with my boyfriend?”

Loki grinned in relief. It was okay. Tony wasn’t actually angry with him. He shook his head affectionately. “Oh, Tony. How little faith you must have in me. Did you truly believe I couldn’t put aside whatever ill feelings I might harbor in order to spend one evening in pleasant conversation with your friends? I do possess a fair amount of self-control, you know.”

Tony regarded the god critically. “Self-control, huh? Sounded like you were actually kind of enjoying yourself in there. Are you saying you were imagining doing something terrible to one or both of them the whole time you were discussing tiramisu and macaroni and cheese? Yes? No? Which is it?”

“Not at all. No one seemed to be holding grudges—they behaved decently to me, I simply responded in kind. And, well... I suppose it was rather nice to engage in civil discourse with more than one person for a change. Not that our discussions aren’t fascinating, but... It’s been a long time since I’ve had much in the way of social interaction.” Loki thought back to the days before Thor’s ill-advised attack on Jotunheim. Then, Sif and the Warriors Three had been his friends, and even though he’d never fooled himself into believing that they preferred him over Thor, there’d been a sense of camaraderie, lively booze-fests, and many deep discussions around a fire about life, the Nine Realms, and, of course, food. 

He missed that.

Not that he’d admit it to anyone, least of all himself. But he didn’t have to say another word for Tony to understand. His stern expression faded, and he pulled Loki into his arms. 

“Hey—listen, I’m really proud of you, and I’m glad you enjoyed the conversation. But, you know you don’t ever have to fake anything on my account, right? I appreciate you going above and beyond with those guys, but I don’t expect you to hide your real feelings. I’m in your corner all the way, babe, and as long as the violence is kept to a minimum, don’t ever hesitate to say what you really think.” Tony pulled back and solemnly met Loki’s eyes. “It kind of creeps me out.”

Hearing Tony say that—“I’m in your corner all the way”— took Loki by surprise. He no longer doubted that Tony cared for him, but to think he would actually take his side against his old friends? It was a bit overwhelming, considering that the only people who had ever given him heartfelt support were his mother and, oddly enough, Thor. A lopsided smile crossed Loki’s face. “Well, thank you. But, it really wasn’t all that difficult. Miss Potts was quite courteous, and Banner was surprisingly agreeable.” Loki’s smile deepened. “If anything ‘freaks you out,’ I would think it would be that.”

“He was probably still thinking of you in that red dress with blonde hair.” Tony grinned back as he raised a hand to cup his lover’s cheek. “Listen—after everything that happened? After everything you’ve been through? You’re amazing. Oh, and gorgeous.” He leaned in until his lips were almost on Loki’s. “Let’s leave the mess until morning and go to bed, okay? Watching the God of Mischief discussing roast goat with the Hulk kind of wore me out.”

Loki pressed his lips against Tony’s, giving them a pleasant buzz as he answered, “Mm. Good idea.” 

They exchanged a soft, sweet kiss before heading off to their bedroom.

*****

Loki slipped into the bathroom to get ready for bed. He wasn’t sure what Tony had in mind for the rest of the evening; he’d implied that he was tired, so that could mean he just wanted to do some of his infernal cuddling and then go to sleep. Or, he could be horny as hell and was being despicably subtle about it, expecting Loki to be the aggressor, as usual. He mused over the possibilities as he changed into a pair of flannel sleep pants, leaving his t-shirt on, and then peeked out to see if he could gauge Tony’s intentions by whatever he was—or wasn’t—wearing. 

Ah. Tony was already under the covers, shirtless, clothes (including underwear) carelessly strewn around on the floor, reading glasses perched on his nose as he idly scrolled through a site on his phone.

So, sex, then. 

A shiver of anticipation went through Loki; so much craziness had been happening lately that his thoughts and emotions had been almost completely focused on simply surviving. But now, with things calm and stable (for the moment anyway) he found himself craving a good, hard rut. Oh, yes—flat on his back, knees pushed up to his shoulders, Tony pounding into him like a jack hammer. Not a lot to ask, was it? And, probably not too difficult to attain, although given that Tony had been treating him with kid gloves since he found out about the pregnancy, he would probably have to do some persuading. 

Which was a tad irritating. Loki was tired of being the one in pursuit. He’d taken the lead nearly every time since the first time they’d gone to bed together, and for once, he wanted to be the one to be, well, seduced. He had a lovely moment envisioning Tony begging him for it, maybe even demanding that he submit to him, and a warm flood of excitement hit him in the crotch. He took a deep breath; Tony had proved his tendency toward cluelessness on more than one occasion. But the hormones coursing through Loki’s blood gave him hope—and determination. He checked his image in the mirror and then strode out to the bedroom. 

Tony looked up, took off his glasses and gave him a welcoming smile. Loki smiled back, but made a show of poking around on what he supposed was now his night stand shelf.

“What’re you doing?” Tony asked curiously.

“Looking for a book. I started one earlier, but now I can’t find it.” He moved to rifle through a stack of tomes beside the comfy chair and held one up in triumph. “Ah, found it!” With a sigh of satisfaction, he flopped down in the chair, put his feet up on the ottoman, opened the book and began to read.

Tony frowned. “Really? You’re going to read... way over there?”

Loki didn’t look up. “Um-hm. The light’s better here.”

“I can turn on a lamp.” Tony reached over and flicked on a bedside lamp. “See? Sixty watts of incandescent illumination. Why don’t you come lie down with me and enjoy Tommy Edison’s good work before they make us switch over to the swirly things?”

At that, Loki looked up innocently. “Oh, thanks, but I’m quite comfortable over here.” He tilted his head and ran his hand through his hair so that it fell softly around his face. He bent his leg at the knee and let it fall seductively to the side, giving Tony a nice view of his flannel-covered crotch. He smiled angelically again and went back to his book, stifling a snicker. With any luck, Tony was getting hot and bothered by now. He might even be ready to get out of bed and come attempt to lure Loki under the covers with him.

But instead, Tony’s eyes narrowed. All he noticed was that his boyfriend was sitting on the far side of the room, more interested in some stupid novel than in cuddling with him. He was getting more indignant by the minute. “Oh, I see. I see what you’re doing. You’re tired and you think I’m going to try to have sex with you when you’re not in the mood. Well, don’t worry, Shakespeare.” Tony held up three fingers, Boy Scout-style. “I swear, I won’t lay a hand on you.” 

The words jarred Loki, and he looked up from his book to peer quizzically at Tony. “What?”

“I mean it. I know I can be a jerk sometimes, but, jeeze, do you really think I’m the kind of asshole who’d try to jump your bones when you don’t feel like it? Especially when you’re pregnant? Shit. Give me some credit.”

Loki kept staring at him. Gods, Tony Stark was the most confusing man he’d ever met. He opened and shut his mouth a few times, trying to decide what to say to such idiocy.

As Tony watched Loki’s nonplussed attempt to respond, he suddenly felt a little guilty. God, he could be such a schmuck. Here was Loki, calm and un-confrontational, just as he promised he’d be the next time they disagreed. Tony could just imagine the kind of snide remark he’d normally have made:“Unhand me, you loathsome ass, haven’t your filthy urges done enough, filling me with your get?” 

Instead, he was graciously avoiding the entire issue (and taking care not to hurt Tony’s feelings) by staying away from him. Which was frustrating as hell, yeah, but Tony being an insensitive douche wasn’t the way to handle it. He sighed and said apologetically, “Aw, I’m sorry, babe, I didn’t mean to mouth off like that. I know you’re tired and need to rest. Come to bed, I promise I’ll leave you alone.”

“Leave me alone?” Loki’s eyes widened into big green pools of disgust. “Oh, bloody hell...” He sank down in the chair and sneered. Every fiber of his being longed to yell and throw his book squarely at Tony’s face, and then thoroughly berate him for his obtuseness as blood dripped from his nose. 

But, he didn’t. 

He forced himself to breathe in and out, and after a moment, the absurdity of the situation struck him and the bulk of the aggravation left him. He gave a rueful “Heh-heh-heh” as he hauled himself out of the chair and went to sit next to Tony. He looked him straight in the eye and said gently, “By the Norns, Stark—are we forever fated to completely misunderstand one another?”

“Huh?”

Loki picked up Tony’s hand. “Your dimwittedness is my own stupid fault. I was playing games with you.”

“What do you mean?”

“I was hoping...” He linked Tony’s fingers between his own, and took a deep breath. “I was hoping you’d feel enough of an attraction to me that you’d try to seduce me.”

“Seduce you?” Tony frowned, trying to understand. “Baby, not a day goes by that I don’t have to use every ounce of self-control I can scrape together not to pick you up and throw you over my shoulder like a caveman. I love you, and it makes me insane not to, uh... Wow. If you wanted some loving, why didn’t you just say so?” He pursed his lips and tilted his head questioningly. “What brought this on anyway? You’re usually pretty straightforward about wanting a roll in the hay.”

Loki sighed and stared down at his and Tony’s entwined hands. “Yes, well... I suppose this sounds odd, coming from someone who attempted to take over your planet, but I’m tired of being in control.” He looked up. “I’m tired of making decisions, tired of worrying about consequences—that doesn’t come naturally to me, you know. I guess I simply wanted you to take the lead so I wouldn’t have to think.”

Tony scrunched up his face. “Well, shit. And here I was, feeling bad for wanting to have a little good, hot monkey sex with my knocked up sweetie, and all the while you were hoping I’d take the reins. Come’ere.” Tony pulled him into his arms, and Loki sought Tony’s mouth to give him a flurry of wet, invasive kisses. Tony eagerly returned them, amazed once again at how right it felt, lying next to his beautiful space-alien god, touching him, tasting him, listening as his breath came faster. “Hey, you—clothes off, on your back, arms and legs wrapped around me like an octopus. That bossy enough for you, tough guy?”

“Good enough,” Loki murmured. He hastened to obey his smart-ass little human, and before long, he was relieved to feel Tony relentlessly thrusting deep inside him, holding him in powerful arms, muttering deliciously dirty things that made Loki feel utterly helpless, completely dominated, and totally owned.

Which was wonderful.

It definitely brought him close to what he needed.

But not... quite... there.

He orgasmed anyway.

*****

Hours later, they lay next to each other, staring at the ceiling and panting—well, Loki was panting, Tony was basically gasping for air like a shore-bound catfish. Clearly he needed to bump up the cardio, that or get a less enthusiastic boyfriend, ha ha—but, in spite of a little light-headedness during that last round of serious fucking, Tony felt pretty pleased with himself. He’d gone the distance, took care of his lover’s needs, gave Loki exactly what he wanted, even though he’d thought his days of being able to get it up three times in a row were long past. He made a mental note to ask Pepper to order him some Viagra, oops, scratch that, he’d ask his doctor for it himself. 

Yeah, Loki was a demanding little bastard between the sheets, and he’d been especially needy tonight, which was actually okay with Tony. He kind of liked this side of his love, a bit unsure, a bit desperate for something Tony felt sure he could provide, although if they were going to keep up this pace, maybe a bedside oxygen tank wouldn’t be such a bad investment.

Once he was more or less certain that a heart attack wasn’t imminent, he turned to face Loki with a look of triumph. “That was fucking incredible, if I do say so myself. How was it for you? Amazing, right? You feeling good and dominated now, babe?” He smirked cheekily.

Loki continued to stare at the ceiling. “It was fine. Certainly took the edge off, at least.”

Tony blinked. “‘Fine?’ ‘Took the edge off?’” he repeated. This was outrageous. “I nearly died! Seriously, if it had taken you two more seconds to get off, my lungs would’ve exploded. I’d be dead right now—dead!” He threw his hands apart. “I did my best. Sorry I didn’t rock your world in the style to which you’re accustomed.” He crossed his arms and huffily lay back to study the ceiling as intently as Loki seemed to be doing.

Loki rolled his eyes. “Oh, Stark. I didn’t mean to insult your manly prowess. You really were exceptional. It’s not you, it’s me. There’s some... inner recess of my soul that remains unsatisfied. I don’t quite know what it is—perhaps a side effect of the pregnancy. But, I seem to long for something that I can’t put words to.” He scooted over and kissed Tony’s cheek. “I’m sorry. Just being here with you is so much better than anything I’ve ever experienced. The sex is secondary.” 

He lay his head on Tony’s chest, and Tony, somewhat mollified, tangled his fingers in Loki’s hair and rubbed his neck. “Well... Okay. I’m totally wiped out now, but later, if you tell me what you want, we can, uh, go again.” Tony wasn’t entirely sure that that would be possible, but he’d give it the old college try, if that was what Loki needed.

Loki gave a low chuckle. “Oh, please. If I need further penetration, I’ll just take care of it myself. I know what that phallus-shaped object in your nightstand drawer is for, and don’t think I’d hesitate to employ it if necessary. I understand it vibrates?” He impishly looked up at Tony. “Might do a better job in the first place. No lungs to explode on such a device.”

Tony curled his lip in a sneer. “You, sir, are asking for a tickling.” 

He took a huge breath and before Loki could react, he proceeded to dig his fingertips into Loki’s side, making him shriek. “Oh, Norns, you’ve found my one indefensible weakness! Stop it, Stark! Noooo...” Loki struggled to roll away, but Tony held him tightly and began working his tickling fingers across Loki’s belly and they were soon giggling like four-year-olds. Loki yelped but finally managed to grab Tony’s wrists and make an escape to the edge of the bed, laughing. “Enough! Enough, lowly mortal, you’ve nearly bested your pregnant god. I bow to your evil fingers. Tell me what flattery you desire, you have won it.”

Tony was busy laughing around catching his breath, but he managed to gasp, “I want to hear how great you think my dick is!”

“Ah! A wise request. Very well, let me see...” Loki considered a moment. “It is magnificent. A steel rod sheathed in softest velvet, an enormous staff that would rival any stallion’s. Shall I tell you how it feels inside me?” Loki was also still breathing rapidly, but he caught Tony’s eye and Tony suddenly realized he was about to be treated to Loki’s version of making amends for his earlier dismissiveness. Tony nodded, and Loki lazily stretched out beside him, taking his hand and rubbing little circles into the palm as he spoke in a low voice, a sinful rumble under the soft tone.

“If I were bound and thrown into the ocean, left to sink lower and lower into that dark and cloying sea, I should feel no less exhilaration at being brought to the surface, to once again breathe good clean air, than I do when you enter me.” He sidled closer to Tony. “When you breach my nether entrance, you force me open, stretching me until I fear I’ll be torn apart, but just when I am sure I can take no more, you sink in to the hilt and I’m filled, made whole, as when a carpenter fits pin in joint.

“I feel you, every inch, from the moment you slide into me; I relish every long, deep thrust, I revel every time the smooth leaking head strikes my most hidden knot of pleasure, making me thrash and moan under you like a cheap whore. Only, for me, the bliss is real. 

“I feel so proud when, again and again, your seed spurts into me—thick creamy strands that wash my insides with your essence—knowing that it was I who brought them forth. It is then I feel myself made fast to you, anchored like a boat adrift too long. And when the heat rises, when the jolts of pleasure travel to the tips of my fingers and inflame my very core, I spill for you, releasing my adoration onto my flesh and yours alike, dreading to feel your still-hard manhood drawn out of me, leaving my body empty, bereft. What surcease do I have at that moment? Only one. I can only cling to the hope that... there will soon be a next time.” 

They were both quiet for a moment, and then Loki turned to face Tony, looking a little discomfited. “Uh... Well! I’ve never said such things to anyone before in my life. But, I’ve never meant them before, either, so... Ahem. I’m sorry I spoke so carelessly earlier, Tony. I love you.” He returned to his place curled up against Tony’s side. Tony pulled him close, letting the warmth of Loki’s spoken thoughts spread through him as he went over his words again.

Damn, he wished he had that Viagra.


	22. Showing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony discovers something Loki had ignored.

Tony and Loki settled in for sleep, but every time Tony dropped off, Loki would flip over, tug at the covers, or sigh restlessly. 

Falling asleep, only to be jolted awake again and again and again was slow torture for Tony’s exhausted mind and body. He finally gave up, sat up, and turned the bedside lamp on to its lowest setting. “Jeeze, Loki, what’s wrong? You’re driving me nuts.” His voice was raspy.

Loki had by now scooted all the way to the edge of the bed, lying on his tummy with his back to Tony. “I don’t know,” he said, his voice muffled because he had the covers pulled over his head.

Tony pulled them back and regarded the dark hair streaming over a vulnerable-looking bare shoulder and pushed his tiredness aside. He wriggled closer, propping himself on one elbow and laying his free arm across Loki’s waist. “Hey. I can tell something’s bugging you. Are you worried?”

“Hm? Oh, no. That is, I don’t think so. Well... maybe. A little.” Loki turned onto his back in order to look Tony in the eye. “Actually, yes. I’m worried.”

Tony stifled a yawn as he asked, “About what?”

Loki stared at the ceiling for a moment before answering. “Everything. Fitting into your life. Giving birth. The baby, the future. It’s just so much...”

“Aw, babe.” Tony came a little closer to consciousness, and now that he realized Loki hadn’t been just randomly tormenting him, he patted him comfortingly. “Okay, first, you are officially not allowed to worry about you and me ever again, got that? We’re absolutely fine. As for the baby, well, there’s a lot of stuff we don’t know, but I guess we’ll figure it out as we go along. I mean, that’s what most parents do, right?”

“We’re not exactly ‘most parents.’” Loki sat up and rubbed his eyes, tiredly blowing air between his lips like a tire deflating. “It doesn’t really matter, though. What choice do we have?”

A smile tugged at Tony’s mouth. “Hey. Listen, do you have any idea how much I’m looking forward to this whole daddy thing? Kid’s first words, learning to walk, building his—or her—first circuit board? Having a little one to take care of, to do stuff with? Disneyland, Central Park, the Washington zoo. Riding bikes together, blowing shit up...”

“Getting up in the middle of the night to feed it. The subsequent clean-up after it expels waste, both liquid and solid, and spews out the contents of its stomach. Doing it again and again, night after night, day after day... Then, later, the screaming pain of teething. Teaching it to use eating utensils, although I don’t recall Thor ever having mastered that particular skill, and he seems to be doing well enough...” 

“Way to be a downer, babe. I guess it’s all in how you look at it. I mean, I’m excited about everything, including the birth. It’s gonna be so cool!”

Loki stiffened and raised his lip in a disgusted sneer. “Cool? In what way?”

“Well, first, I’m going to record every minute of it—”

“What?”

“Yeah, I’ll get a few camcorders set up on tripods ahead of time, each set to capture a different angle. That way, I can spend the whole time helping you!”

“HELPING me?” Loki asked incredulously with a tiny bit of panic. “What could you possibly do to help me give birth?”

“Tons! I’m going to be your birth coach. Banner and I talked about it while you and Pep were having your little chat. Now, he’s not an obstetrician, but he knows all about natural childbirth from when he was in India, and—”

Loki’s eyes were wide. “Wait just one moment—what exactly do you mean by ‘natural’ childbirth? What other kind is there?”

“Well... they call it natural when the, uh, mom doesn’t take anything for the pain, and—”

“Pain? What pain? There are potions—surely even Midgard has potions...”

“We call ‘em drugs, but yeah, we do. Thing is, it’s better for the kid if you use breathing techniques and guided imagery instead. Now, don’t worry. Banner’s going to train us, and—” Tony paused. He’d never seen a look of such sheer horror on Loki’s face before. “What?” he asked, feeling a little bewildered. “Don’t they do stuff like that on Asgard?”

“I wouldn’t know!” Loki almost shouted. “Those are all women’s concerns! I’ve never even...” Loki pushed his hair out of his eyes. “Men aren’t privy to such things, the mages take care of everything. I’d never even considered the possibility that pain might be a-a... choice.”

“Um... Well, it doesn’t have to be our choice.”

“You just said we had to do... breathing techniques and guided imagery, whatever the bloody hell that is, and—”

“Aw, it’s not written in stone, sweetie, we don’t have to go with that. But, God, how do you not know anything about this stuff?”

Loki jerked back, and his eyes were snapping fire. “Forgive my ignorance, Stark, but I was a prince! I was born to wield a sword in battle, to officiate in matters of state, t-to craft treaties and plan strategies between realms, not to push a whelp out of my loins like a brood mare!”

“Okay, okay, I just meant...” Tony caught himself becoming defensive, and immediately changed to a soothing tone. “I mean, I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry.” He managed to get Loki settled down next to him and murmured soothing words into his ear. “It’s totally okay, sweetie. I’ll pick up some books on the subject and we’ll make decisions after you’ve read up on everything.”

They lay quietly for a while and Tony idly stroked Loki’s smooth skin, eventually running his hand over Loki’s stomach. His touch felt nice, but instead of the affectionate rubbing which Loki expected, Tony began a series of investigative probings, first on one side of his belly button, then the other, and then under. To Loki’s shock, Tony chortled. 

“What?” Loki demanded irritably.

“Oh my God, you’re finally starting to show!”

“Pardon?”

“Your tummy’s starting to, you know, stick out. I can feel it!”

“It is not!”

“Yes it is! Feel! See?”

Tony took Loki’s hand and positioned it just so. 

Well. 

It was unmistakeable. There was a gentle slope to Loki’s stomach that he would have sworn wasn’t there earlier in the evening. He swallowed hard and gave a resigned sigh. “Damn it, Stark. You’re right.”

“Ha. Told you.” Tony basked in this rare moment of being right before realizing that Loki didn’t sound especially happy about the development. Tony gently turned Loki’s face to his own. “Hey, come on. This is mega-cool. It means the baby’s growing, it’s healthy.” When Loki didn’t respond with anything other than a baleful look, he gave him a soft kiss. “Wow. I keep forgetting this must be beyond weird for you. I’m so sorry, I—”

“Oh, stop apologizing. I’ve had some time to get used to the idea, I’m just... recalcitrant, I suppose. It infuriates me that my body has the damn gall to go and do something I didn’t tell it to do.” They held each other’s gaze for a moment, and then Loki broke into a lop-sided smile. “It’s fine, Tony, really. I may not be as idiotically pleased about the idea of ejecting something larger than my head from, well, somewhere on my person without a pain potion, but that doesn’t mean I’m unhappy. I just need to learn more about the process. Do you think you can get me those books tomorrow?”

“You got it, angel-pants. There’ll be a stack waist high before dinner time.”

Loki nodded appreciatively and they both soon managed to finally fall asleep.

******

A funny little stirring woke Loki. He lay there for a moment, wondering if he’d dreamed it, when it came again. A soft feathery touch, as if a butterfly was slowly flapping its wings against his belly from the inside. He placed one hand over the spot and looked down at the slight roundness he’d apparently been unwilling to acknowledge before. A grin crossed his face, and he started to wake up Tony, but the movement was now gone, and, besides, he didn’t think it had been strong enough to feel from the outside.

Plus, Tony was dead to the world. It would take dumping a pitcher of cold water on him to rouse him. Which, if Loki’d had his magic available to him, he probably would have done, since Tony was so keen on sharing all the milestones of the pregnancy with him. But, that wouldn’t be nice.

And, Loki was hungry.

He quietly slipped out of bed and pulled on his sleep pants and Tony’s ratty plaid flannel bathrobe before heading to the kitchen. He stuck some bread in the recently-replaced toaster and poured a glass of milk—lately, he’d noticed that even the aroma of coffee brewing made him feel nauseated—and when the toast popped up, he ate it dry.

He sat down and rubbed his stomach as he chewed, wishing he could feel the little flapping sensation again, but the baby was quiet. There were myriad thoughts clashing in his brain, everything from where, exactly, they were going to put the thing once it was born—he was willing to bet Tony would insist on keeping it in the room with them, ugh—to whether he would be able to use his seidr again immediately once the creature, oh, all right, the baby, had left his body. The “how” of which he wasn’t entirely certain.

He wasn’t used to dealing with unknowns. He was accustomed to observing, subtly investigating, and doing research before plunging into anything new. He liked having a plan and being prepared for all contingencies whenever possible, although, clearly, that didn’t always work out for him.

But this... He had no one to observe, no one to ask questions of, and absolutely no reference works to consult, although he looked forward to the books Tony had promised him. But of course even they wouldn’t be able to answer all his questions—for Norns sake, he was a Frost Giant. Who knew what peculiarities he might harbor under his Aesir skin? He finished his toast and sighed. 

He wanted his mother.


	23. An Apology

 

With his hunger temporarily sated, Loki decided to go up to the tower roof and get some fresh air. He stood before the elevator, punched the “up” button, and marveled once again at the breadth of Midgardian resourcefulness. It was truly amazing how the mortals managed to compensate for their pathetic lack of magical abilities and thus to live almost normal lives, he thought as the car arrived and the metal doors slid open. 

 

Outside, it was chilly to be in only a robe and flannel pants, but Loki found a spot out of the wind and wrapped his arms around his chest for warmth. He leaned against the cold cement wall and stared up at the New York sky, smiling to see the full moon. It was larger and brighter on Asgard, but still very pretty here. He mused on the celestial differences between the two realms, a fitting line of thought for someone preparing to humble himself so deeply.

 

He needed to speak to his mother, but the only way to reach her was either by getting Thor to act as an intermediary, or by reaching out to Heimdall. Thor was not an option, because Loki was too impatient to take the time to find him and, besides, he didn’t care to let his brother know how little fortitude he possessed in the face of his bizarre situation.

 

No, like a lowly commoner, he’d have to go crawling to Heimdall. He scowled at the thought; Heimdall had been witness to some of the greatest humiliations of his youth, and the sentry had never been one to be taken in by Loki’s bullshit. He’d also disregarded Loki’s authority during his brief stint as king, leading to, well, not very good things for Loki. But, Loki knew it had all been for the well-being of the people of Asgard, and, now that Loki was in recovery, it occurred to him that he probably owed Heimdall an apology.

 

He sat cross-legged on the hard rooftop floor and closed his eyes. “Heimdall,” he said aloud. “Please. I know we haven’t been on very good terms lately, but—”

 

“But?” came the voice in his head, sounding a bit impatient. 

 

Well, at least he was listening. “Look, I, uh, haven’t always... made good decisions, and, well...” Rare was the case when Loki struggled to express himself, but now he hesitated, trying to find the next sentence .

 

“Go on,” Heimdall prompted smoothly.

 

Loki groaned, but stumbled ahead. “Well, I suppose you could say I’ve behaved rather badly in the past, and I’ve probably been a bit short with you now and again, and—”

 

He heard an exasperated sigh reverberate in his brain. “Forgive my rudeness, young prince, but I’d really prefer it if you’d get to the point.”

 

Loki rolled his eyes, but said, “Very well. What I’m trying to say is... I’m sorry.” Once the words slid out, Loki was surprised to find that he actually meant them. It became a little easier to speak. “You’ve always had the realm’s best interests at heart and I... For a long time, I cared only for my own selfish interests. But, I’ve changed and I’ve learned, and now I know how wrong I was. I’m sorry for the pain and grief I’ve caused you, and I-I beg your forgiveness.” 

 

His mind was quiet, and for a moment he was discouraged. If Heimdall wouldn’t accept his apology, or if he’d been forbidden to assist Loki in communicating with his mother, he’d have no choice but to face the greater humiliation of going to Thor. But, to his surprise and relief, Heimdall laughed.

 

“Well, that’s something I never thought I’d hear Loki Silvertongue say. You really have come far in your recovery. Your mother is very proud of you, and rightly so.”

 

“Yes, well... Thank you.” Loki cleared his throat. “Uh... Speaking of the Allmother, do you suppose I might have a word with her? In private. Please.”

 

“Of course. In fact, she’s headed here now...” Heimdall’s voice now had a positively jovial tone. “A little bird told her you might be asking for her. Farewell, young prince. I... accept your apology.”

 

With that, Loki felt Heimdall’s presence fade, and another draw closer. He closed his eyes, remembering the way moonlight made Frigga’s blonde hair shimmer. He remembered when he was small, how her eyes would sparkle as she indulgently watched her sons gambol about on nights like this, silly and rambunctious instead of being properly in bed asleep. 

 

Her scent seemed to fill the air. He held out one hand, imagining his fingertips first on a smiling cheek, then brushing over a silk dress threaded with gold. His shoulders began to feel warmer, almost as if a loving arm had slipped around him in a warm embrace. He kept his eyes tightly shut, refusing to face the empty air, wanting to hold on to the illusion as long as possible. “Mother,” he said, silently speaking. “I need your wisdom. Please, let me hear you.” After a moment, he heard Frigga say “Loki...” as clearly as if she were sitting beside him.

 

He leaned his head back. “Mother?” he whispered out loud.

 

“I can hear you, darling. What is it? Are you all right? Is the baby...”

 

“We’re fine. In fact, I felt it move today,” Loki said softly.

 

“Oh, how wonderful! Was it amazing?”

 

“Yes, but... It suddenly seems so _real.”_ He switched back to speaking to her in his mind.  “I have so many questions, and no one to bring them to.”

 

“Tsk. I know it’s all so strange for you, and of course you have questions. But I’ve been studying my ancestor’s writings and I feel sure I can offer you at least some answers. Ask away, my love. What do you want to know?”

 

Loki laughed a little. “Well, first, a very basic matter. I’m afraid I know the answer, but—how will the creature, uh, _baby_ , even come out of me?”

 

Frigga laughed too. “You’ll need to assume your Jotun form, dear. Your true anatomy is hidden, but will serve you well once it is revealed.”

 

Loki curled his lip. “Ugh. Isn’t there another way?”

 

“A skilled surgeon could take it out of you, but that is an extreme measure. It would be extremely stressful and dangerous for both you and my grandchild. I sincerely hope it won’t come to that.”

 

“As do I.” Loki sighed resignedly. “I doubt there’s anyone on Midgard with the appropriate qualifications who would understand about my... heritage.”

 

“Mm. Well, the good thing is that, once your Jotun anatomy is available, things will progress like any other birth. Surely there is information on the subject available on Midgard?”

 

“Tony is going to bring me some books.”

 

“Very good. And, don’t forget, I will be there to assist. Everything will be fine.”

 

“Tony wants us to have ‘natural childbirth,’ which sounds painful.” Loki sniffed in annoyance.

 

Frigga gave an amused huff. “I am familiar with that concept. Feel free to go along with it if you like, but I’ll bring a potion, just in case. There’s nothing harmful in it, and it’s worthwhile to be prepared. Now, what else concerns you, love?”

 

“My _seidr._.. Will it return to normal right away, or—”

 

“It will, but remember, it will have been pent up for a long time and your body will be quite weak for a day or so. I would suggest leaving it alone until you are strong enough to control it properly, and then ease into using it again. You’ll be back to normal within a week, I would think.”

 

“That will be a relief.” Loki thought a minute before asking, “Will the child also have _seidr?”_

 

“Judging by what happened at SHIELD headquarters, I would say yes _._ But don’t worry—he won’t be able to access the power until he’s older, and then only through your teaching. It’s rather like learning to read—the potential is there, but there’s no comprehension until the child has reached a certain level of development.”

 

“If you’ll recall, it’s already caused an explosion,” Loki pointed out dryly.

 

“Yes, but it was merely funneling your own magic. Once it’s no longer bound to your body, that will not be possible.”

 

Loki nodded, feeling slightly relieved. 

 

“What else?” Frigga prompted.

 

“Well... If I’m in Jotun form, Tony won’t be able to touch me.” Loki sounded sad. “What about the baby? Without Odin to place a spell on it, it may be just the same. Will it ever feel its father’s caress?”

 

For the first time, Frigga was silent. “I don’t know,” she finally answered. “I’ll look into that. There has to be a way.” 

 

They were both quiet for a bit, and then Frigga said, “Well, I’m very sorry, dear, but I must go now. I hope you feel at least a little better. Oh, and that was a lovely apology you made to Heimdall—if you’d like to talk again, I’m sure you won’t have any trouble contacting me in the future. And let Thor know the moment you think the birth is imminent. He will bring me to you right away.”

 

“I do feel better. Thank you, Mother. I-I love you.”

 

“And I you, my son. I can hardly wait to be with you again, and to meet my grandchild. That will be a wonderful day.”

 

“I suppose.”

 

“It will! Now, please don’t worry.”

 

“All right. Goodbye, Mother.” Loki leaned back and let the energy drain out of him. He felt wrung out, but lighter for having most of his concerns answered. Now, he just wished he could think of a way for Tony to be able to touch him when the baby arrived, since he was so determined to be his “birth coach.” _What an absurd notion,_ he thought, as if they were going to play some sort of bizarre contact sport. _We’ve already done that,_ he thought with a snicker.

 

Loki idly held his hand up, obscuring the moon in the sky. He slowly flexed his fingers.

 

And, a thought came to him. 


	24. The Big Reveal

 

 

 

 

Tony had been too deep in REM sleep to be disturbed by Loki getting out of bed in the early morning. He slept hard for a while longer, dreaming of old battles, and he eventually jerked awake in distress. He reached for the comfort of Loki’s cool but easily-warmed skin and came back with only empty covers. He reached full consciousness and listened for the sound of peeing, or footsteps, or _something,_ but there was nothing in the room but silence. He sat up, coughed, and rubbed sleep from his eyes. 

 

“Loki?” he rasped.

 

Nothing. 

 

He got up, pulled on his underwear, and, still half-blind, felt around for his bathrobe, but it was gone too. Putting two and two together, he made his way to the living room.

 

On the couch was a plaid-covered mound topped by a mass of tousled black hair. Loki’s front was buried in the fold of the couch, a throw over his feet. Tony sleepily grinned, and went to pull the dark tresses away and plant a kiss on his neck, but before he could reach him, Loki growled, “Don’t touch me.”

 

Tony pulled back, startled. He ran through the last several hours and couldn’t remember doing anything to piss Loki off. Hell, he’d been asleep—how could he piss him off in his sleep? Oh, yeah. _This is Loki we’re talking about._   “What’s wrong?” he asked in a puzzled tone. He reared back in shock as Loki turned around.

 

He was blue.

 

A soft sky color, actually, his lips indigo. Red eyes, but a deep red, almost brown, not quite as disturbing as the shimmering red they’d been the first time Tony saw him like this. “Hello, human,” Loki said mischievously.

 

“Wh-what, uh— _huh?_ What’re you doing?” 

 

“Oh dear, I thought you were ‘totally fine’ with me in this form,” Loki snarked.

 

“I am! But, a little warning would be nice. How’d you like to wake up next to me with me in my Iron Man suit?”

 

“Mm. Point taken.”

 

They stared at each other for a moment, and then Tony asked, “Why can’t I touch you?”

 

“Because in this form, a mere touch would freeze the flesh right off of your bones. One of the many benefits of being a Frost Giant.” Loki sniffed ruefully.

 

“Okay, good to know. Then, may I ask why you’re, you know, _like_ that?” Now that Tony had gotten over the initial surprise, he was noticing that Loki was just as gorgeous in his blueness as he was the regular way. And, weirdly, kind of cuddly and adorable in Tony’s old bathrobe. He really wanted to pull him into his lap and snuggle the hell out of him. 

 

Loki yawned and ran a hand through his hair. “Well, I have a reason for taking on this form. I’ve been like this since 4 AM. Now, which of your fingers do you consider to be the most dispensable?”

 

“I’m pretty fond of all of ‘em, to tell you the truth,” Tony said guardedly. “Why?”

 

“Alright, then. Give me your leg.” 

 

Loki gestured for Tony to sit at the far end of the couch, which he did. He hesitantly held out his leg, frowning. “Need my legs, too, sweetie.”

 

“This is an experiment. I truly don’t believe I will hurt you, but if I do, this is a relatively non-essential area for a case of frost bite.” Loki indicated the area below Tony’s knee.

 

“This shows how much I trust you.” Tony braced himself, and Loki laid the tip of one finger on Tony’s bare shin and quickly removed it. “How was that?”

 

Tony shrugged. “Fine. Hardly felt anything, it was so fast.”

 

“All right, let’s try a little more.” Loki put two entire fingers across Tony’s leg. “Now?”

 

“No problem. Kind of cool, but it’s just like your regular temperature. What’s going on?”

 

“Once more.” Loki took Tony’s calf between both of his hands and squeezed. It wasn’t sensual at all; in fact, Tony felt pretty much like a lab rat, given the way Loki was frowning and poking and prodding his skin experimentally. “How does that feel?”

 

“Good. Squeeze a little harder, my muscles are pretty tight after the workout you gave ‘em last night.” Tony was giving him a cocky grin, and Loki rolled his eyes.

 

“Weak humor aside, this is excellent. Just as I’d hoped.” Loki patted Tony’s leg and leaned back, clearly pleased.

 

“Okay, so I’ve still got all my skin. What was all that about not letting me touch you because I’d freeze to death?”

 

“I wasn’t sure if this would work, so I didn’t want to take any chances.”

 

“You weren’t sure _what_ would work?”

 

Loki drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I was able to contact my mother and get some answers to my questions about the birth. She says I’ll have to take on my Jotun form in order for the baby to... have a way out.” He gave Tony a meaningful glance. “And, since you are so determined to be a part of the ordeal, I was concerned about you not being able to touch me. You’re such an impetuous dolt, I was afraid you’d forget the danger and do something stupid, like try to hold my hand, or, worse, hug me, while I’m pushing the damn thing out of my nether regions.”

 

“Yeah, God forbid I hug the man I love while he’s giving birth to my baby.” Tony waited a beat and added, “Now, that’s a phrase I never thought I’d be saying _.”_

 

“Indeed. Anyway, it occurred to me that perhaps I could use the same technique I used to warm myself on that first occasion when we mated. I thought if I practiced, I might be able to hold the heat in my flesh for more than a few minutes. But I discovered that, without the glamour spell interfering, it was quite easy. After a few tries, I was able to stay warm without even thinking about it. I’ve maintained it for hours now, and I’m still perfectly comfortable. I should be able to do it for the entire time of the birthing.”

 

Tony drew his brows together. “But, isn’t that magic? How are you able to do it without, I don’t know, blowing up my stereo system or something?”

 

“This isn’t magic at all, it’s apparently a natural body function of the Jotun. Perhaps it’s a remnant of long ago days when Jotunheim was at peace with other realms and needed to be able to interact with other beings. I don’t know, I’ll have to discuss it with Mother one of these days.” He fell silent and Tony carefully reached out to cup his chin in his hand.

 

“God, you’re beautiful.”

 

Loki sneered. “Oh, am I? Or are you just saying that to make me feel better about being a freak?”

 

“I’m saying what I think.” Tony freely caressed Loki’s face, and he liked the way Loki dropped his defensive attitude and closed his eyes, long black lashes feathered against blue skin. He rubbed his cheek against Tony’s palm, and Tony marveled at how rigid the raised tribal markings felt among the softness. He traced one with a finger tip and had Loki practically purring in pleasure.

 

“No one’s ever touched me when I’m like this,” he murmured.

 

Emboldened, Tony asked, “Okay if I give you a kiss?”

 

Loki’s eyes popped open, but he nodded. 

 

Tony leaned in and pressed his lips against Loki’s cool ones. With his eyes closed, it felt just the same as usual, and Tony eagerly scooted closer and took Loki in his arms. “Damn, you feel so good,” he whispered.

 

Loki burrowed in and Tony could feel the tenseness flowing out of his body as he relaxed against him. “Mmm...”

 

A thought suddenly came to Tony. “Uh, Loki?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Could I... you know?”

 

Loki pulled back and gave him a quizzical look. “What?”

 

“Could I... take a peek?” Tony gestured at Loki’s crotch. “You know, at your, uh, junk? I guess it’s kind of weird for me to ask, but—”

 

“It’s not weird at all. I don’t blame you for being curious. To be honest, I’ve never looked myself.” Loki glanced downward. “I’ve only ever taken on this form for shock value, I never cared to just _be_ this way.”

 

“Hang on a minute. Stay warm.”

 

Tony ran to his bathroom and rummaged in a drawer until he found a small hand mirror. He came back and handed it to Loki. “Here. You should be the first to see, right?”

 

Loki raised an eyebrow and curled his lip. “Gods. I suppose so.” He stood up and slipped off his sleep pants and then lay back. Tony delicately looked away while Loki held the mirror between his legs. He made a sound that was almost a sob, abruptly tossed the mirror aside, rolled into a fetal position and pulled the robe around himself, refusing to meet Tony’s eyes.

 

“Aw, babe,” Tony said consolingly. It hadn’t occurred to him that Loki had not only never before seen himself in this way, but that he might be distressed by the sight. “Come on, it’s okay,” he said hastily. “Look, how about we go get some breakfast? There’s a deli down the street that does the best lox and bagels in town. Maybe you could go ahead and change back to your vanilla form, though, I—”

 

“Leave me alone,” Loki said in a strained tone. “This is unbearable. I no longer want you to see me like this. Not you, not anyone.” His voice dropped. “I really am a freak,” he added, mostly to himself.

 

“You are not! There’s a whole race of people like you, you just didn’t happen to grow up around them—if you had, you wouldn’t think anything about it!” Tony heard another stifled sob, and he squeezed Loki’s shoulder. “Please, sweetie. Look at me.” He leaned in until his lips were almost touching Loki’s ear. “Please,” he said softly.

 

Loki finally turned slightly and glanced back at Tony. “What?” he asked dolefully.

 

“Come on, turn over.”

 

When they were face-to-face, Tony smiled at Loki. “Hey, if it weren’t for the baby exit strategy, I’d say blow off the Jotun thing altogether. It’s your body, you shouldn’t have to deal with this if you don’t want to. But, as you said, the little nipper’s got to, you know, come out somehow, and I’m guessing this is going to be easier than a C-section. So, please—don’t worry about what I think, or anybody. Take your time, and get used to the idea on your own terms. Just know that I’ll be right beside you every step of the way. Okay?”

 

Loki took a deep breath, frowned, and gave an exasperated huff. “How can you be like this?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“So accepting. So... kind. Even animals reject the aberrant among them. My own father left me to die just because I was smaller than normal.” He nestled closer to Tony and his voice cracked with emotion. “How can you continue to love me, when I’m so clearly different from you, from everyone you know? How can you—”

 

“Fuck, Loki, I love you. I love you,” Tony said, his lips against Loki’s skin. “I don’t care about anything but the fact that we belong together. Hey, I’m no prize! I mean, I _am_ , but only superficially. Inside, I’m all the shitty things you always say I am—self-centered, on my way to being a full-time drunk, too quick to act and not to think. I’m all those things, but I’m changing, I’m getting better, and it’s because of you. And, maybe, you’re getting better because of me.” He sought Loki’s eyes and held his gaze. “We’re going to have a baby, and he’ll be better than both of us put together. Right?”

 

Loki’s eyes had welled up with tears, but he brushed them away. “Or, he’ll be worse than either of us ever thought about being.”

 

“Nah. Not when he’s got two parents who love him. And each other.” They shared a somber moment, and then the smile returned to Tony. “Look what we’ve done, you and me. We’ve both been through various kinds of hell. Had a few major screw ups. Came back and started over. We’ve seen some serious shit, babe, and we’re smart enough not to make the same mistakes twice. Trust me—this kid’s going to be just fine.”

 

Loki watched Tony’s face from under heavy eyelids, and he seemed to come to a decision. “Hand me the mirror.”

 

Tony reached down to grab it, gave it to Loki, and then sat up and turned away. Loki sighed, settled flat on his back and parted his thighs. He silently examined himself in the mirror, and then set it aside. “Go ahead,” he said wearily. “Look if you want.”

 

Tony turned back. He let his eyes trail downwards, from Loki’s face to the pale blue skin of his hairless chest, the small cobalt nipples, his slightly rounded belly, to a thatch of black wiry hair partly obscured by Loki’s hand holding his penis out of the way.

 

Tony paused there, and then looked lower. Under the base of Loki’s cock was a small expanse of smooth skin. It became a slit nestled between two plump mounds, with delicate petals of softest blue peeking out between them. Tony wanted to gently part them, but he didn’t dare, not yet. Not until Loki invited him to. Instead, he focused on studying the sight laid out before him. Yes, it was odd, but, damn, it was beautiful—a secret place revealed, perfect as it was. He glanced up and saw Loki regarding him with a small grin. “Damn it, Stark. You look like a hawk circling its prey.”

 

“You’re so gorgeous, babe. I really want to... I mean, I wish we could...” Tony cleared his throat. “Uh, you know, maybe we should get ready and go to breakfast now—” Resolutely, he started to pull back, but Loki leaned forward and grabbed his wrist.

 

“No.” He lay back again and stared curiously at Tony. “You really find it... appealing?” He sounded doubtful, but pleased. 

 

“Oh, jeeze. Yeah. Yeah, I do.” Tony swallowed hard. “It totally makes me want to bang you ‘til the cows come home. Sorry. That’s probably not what you wanted to hear right now, is it?”

 

“Oh, I don’t know.” Loki reached down and trailed a finger along his newly discovered entrance. He pressed in and stroked himself, and a surprised moan escaped him. “Oh. Uh... Hm. That’s nice.” Tony watched the finger disappear within him and he started when Loki breathed, “Ah... Tony. _Touch me.”_

 

Tony licked his lips uncertainly. “Really?” 

 

Loki’s languid expression turned to a scowl. “Yes, _really_. Unless you’ve been lying and find my strange Jotun body revolting, in which case, please, tell me now. I’ll avoid wantonly presenting myself to you in the future.”

 

“I wasn’t lying!” A sultry spark passed between them as they met each other’s eyes, and Tony abruptly leaned down and gave Loki a fierce kiss, partly out of irritation, partly to prove to him how desperately he wanted him, exotic blue flesh and all. He gently brushed his fingertips over the tender opening, and heard Loki murmur in a gravelly voice, “In me. Please.”

 

And then, everything was scrambled. Tony’s brain desperately tried to sort out the conflicting signals—Loki’s erection jabbed into his belly while the inviting flesh beneath it opened easily for him. Loki made impatient thrusts with his hips, urging Tony’s tentative fingers to dip in and slide deeper, giving a little grunt of frustration at his lover’s hesitation. “What are you waiting for? Get those damn things off,”  he growled, tugging at Tony’s briefs.

 

“I didn’t want to hurt you, but—shit, all right, all right, to hell with being considerate. Just give me a minute!” Tony hastily skinned out of his underwear and then wriggled down to fit his own cock to Loki’s slit. He was about to push inside, when a thought caused him to stop. “Hey, should I wear a condom?” 

 

Loki gave him a withering look. “Why, do you think you might be able to get me _more_ pregnant?” he snapped.

 

“Oh. Uh, no. Never mind.” With that, Tony thrust in, a little harder than he would have if Loki hadn’t just snarked at him, and he groaned when the snug, slick channel gave way.

 

He heard a gasp from Loki and kind of congratulated himself on his handling of the whole situation. He’d been afraid Loki would give him more hell before letting him get his bearings—after all, this _was_ weird, no matter how unbelievably good it felt—and he’d had a twinge of concern that he might lose his wood if Loki screwed with his already befuddled brain so soon in the proceedings. But, a gasp was good, gasps meant that something hot and sexy was happening, so, encouraged, he pulled back and thrust in again. 

 

_Hard._

 

To Tony’s dismay, Loki yelped and gasped, “Stop!” This time, it was pretty obvious that this wasn’t the good kind of gasp, and Tony quickly pulled out.

 

“What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

 

“That _hurt.”_  

 

“Oh, shit. Did I pinch something? I do that sometimes with the ladies, get a little ahead of myself, and—”

 

“I’m not a ‘lady,’ you cretin! No, it hurts... inside.” 

 

Tony never understood how Loki could manage to look so utterly disgusted and so completely beautiful at the same time, but, boy, did he look that way now. Tony hovered uncertainly. “Well, uh—whatever I did, I’m sorry. You want to take another run at it, or—?”

 

The disgusted look had morphed into a stoic expression. “No. Not just yet.” He glanced down at himself and then leveled a matter-of-fact look back at Tony. “Stark... You just took my Jotun virginity.”

 

“Oh... Oh, babe.” Tony blinked as realization came over him. “You said no one had ever touched you when you were like this... so, yeah. I guess I did.”

 

“Well. This just keeps getting better and better,” Loki sighed resignedly.

 

“Baby...” Tony snuggled in between Loki and the couch and took him in his arms. “I’m so sorry for hurting you.”

 

Loki waved his hand airily. “Eh, it’s fine. I’ve been gored by a Tronderian battle rhino, being penetrated by your puny manhood’s hardly going to kill me. I’ll be okay.” The sharp pain he’d experienced had ebbed away, leaving only a dull throb, and the ludicrousness of the situation was beginning to amuse him. He gave Tony a sidelong glance to see if he felt the same, but Tony’s brow was furrowed in thought.

 

“I’m just so sorry. But, I swear, it never occurred to me—”

 

“It’s all right! Obviously, it didn’t occur to me either.” Loki paused a moment and then added, “Norns, Tony. You’ve been my first for so many things, haven’t you? Just when I thought the only firsts I had left would be progressively more terrible forms of misery. You amaze me.” He was gazing at Tony with such affection that Tony felt his heart beat faster, and he hugged Loki and gave a rueful chuckle. 

 

“You poor kid. I had no idea I was about to pop your space alien cherry.”

 

“I know. And not only that, but I’m already pregnant. Don’t you Midgardians have a popular myth about something like that?” Loki asked mischievously.

 

“Uh, it’s one of our major religions, kid. I wouldn’t call it a myth in public.”

 

“Good to know.” Loki smiled up at Tony. “You mentioned breakfast. I need to recover from being speared by you, and anyway, I think the fetus has woken up due to your rude intrusion into its abode. We’re both starving. Let’s go eat.”

 

“Sure.” Tony was quiet for a moment, then he added hopefully, “But... Do you think you’re going to want to try this again sometime? I have a feeling it’d be incredible.”

 

“Yes. Yes, I do, and it will.” Loki kissed Tony and then took on his Aesir form. “I’ll get dressed. Any suggestions for a disguise? Without my _seidr,_ I can’t do much on the spur of the moment.”

 

“Come on, I have an idea.”

 

Tony led him to the master bathroom and fished around until he found one of Pepper’s old hair ties. He pulled Loki’s hair back with it and then picked out a gray t-shirt, jeans, and a pair of running shoes from Loki’s wardrobe. He got a beat-up Yankees baseball cap out of his side of the closet, and a pair of Ray-bans, and handed the whole lot to Loki. “Here you go. Do you think you could be a little shorter? Nah, guess not. It’s okay, this is a pretty nondescript outfit. You’ll blend right into the crowd.”

 

“Wonderful,” Loki sniffed disdainfully. “I must say, Midgardian fashion for men leaves something to be desired.”

 

“Yeah, but, damn, your ass looks hot in anything!” Tony gave Loki a leering grin as he left him to dress, and Loki couldn’t help but smile. But it faded as he ran a hand over his stomach and he frowned.

 

“For now,” he thought as he slipped on the jeans. He had to tug harder than usual to button them. He couldn’t wait to see what sort of sartorial monstrosites he’d be reduced to wearing once his tummy was fully expanded. Coming up with a disguise would no longer be a problem, as he’d just never leave the house. Still, he didn’t look too bad at the moment, and he slipped on the cap and sunglasses cheerfully enough. _Might as well make the best of things while I still have my boyish figure_ , he thought as he checked the mirror.

 

Tony gave a wolf whistle at the sight of him, Loki rolled his eyes, and they strolled to the deli without incident.


	25. Buying a Newspaper Shouldn't Be So Stressful

As far as Tony was concerned, walking down a busy sidewalk alongside Loki was the first... well, normal thing the two of them had done together since they met. It felt good, strolling along in happy anonymity, caught up in the little world the two of them had created. And yet, he was still a part of it, his town, the city that never sleeps. He loved it.

And Loki was laughing and talking easily, asking questions, pointing out interesting-looking sights, and Tony forgot to worry about being recognized, or about the past, or the future, or anything at all, really. He was just proud to be out with his gorgeous, brilliant boyfriend, who clearly was totally into him, giving him fond looks and occasional touches on his arm as they walked. And, he couldn’t help feeling a little bit smug. It was kind of like how an old guy in the park would patiently hold out peanuts to a squirrel day after day, until the little creature would finally come close enough to eat out of his hand.

Not that he thought of Loki as a squirrel. But, it was something like that.

As for Loki, for the first time in ages, he felt free. Happy, even. To stroll down the street wearing his familiar skin, out in the daylight, not having to glance behind him every few seconds—that was a long-forgotten pleasure. It didn’t matter that he was clad in stupid clothes or that his hair was annoyingly pulled back and topped by a hideous cap. It didn’t matter that he was surrounded by buildings that blocked the sun, or that the crisp morning air was tainted by bus exhaust, or that a schizophrenic on the street corner was yelling obscenities at someone who wasn’t there. He was with Tony, and they were themselves, no one special, just two people in love on their way to a nice morning meal.

It was glorious.

******

The deli was teeming with impatient morning customers, grabbing coffee and a Danish on their way to the office. Loki found it very interesting, as there really was nothing like this on Asgard. He looked up at the menu, but saw nothing familiar. “Order for me, will you, Stark?”

“Sure, babe. I think you’ll like what I have in mind.”

Loki gave him a sly grin. “I usually do.” And, he winked. 

He winked! For a moment, Tony was completely derailed. Such a little thing, but so unexpected, so mischievous-but-in-a-good-way. Tony found himself falling just a little bit deeper in love with his Aesir god. That kept happening somehow, and it made Tony’s heart swell. He leaned in and whispered, “You’re adorable, you know that?” 

Loki raised an eyebrow and then gave him a haughty sneer. “I most certainly am not.” Then, that sly smirk again. “I’m a formidable warrior, teeming with the power of pregnancy hormones. You should fear me.” He broke into laughter. “But, if you’re foolish enough to find me adorable, so be it.” He slid an arm around Tony’s waist and squeezed. “I shall try to be worthy of your idiotic fancy.” 

They looked into each other’s eyes and Tony kind of forgot what they were there for until the man behind the counter shouted, “I said, next!” in an annoyed way. Tony hastily made two orders of lox and bagels, and coffee. When their order was up, they carried their plates to a table and settled in to eat. 

Loki hadn’t bothered to take note of what he was being served until he was seated. The food looked familiar; he took a bite of the salty fish, the smooth cream, the tart red onion, and the soft bagel, and he closed his eyes, making a hum of delight. “Oh, Tony. This is amazing,” he said around his food. He swallowed and Tony noticed he was looking at him with an expression that seemed almost close to tears.

“What’s wrong, babe? I thought you liked it.”

“I do. It... it reminds me of a meal we used to get back in Asgard. I’ve had nothing like it ever since I...” He looked down at his plate, and then back at Tony and now he was smiling. “It reminds me of long-ago times, of home. I never thought I’d have it again. Thank you. This is a real treat.”

Tony put a hand on his. “It’s just lox and bagels. But, I’m glad it’s special to you.”

Loki gave a self-conscious laugh and went back to eating. He looked around at the other patrons. Most were staring at phones or tablets, some were engaged in conversation, and a few were reading a newspaper. Loki had a sudden surge of curiosity. “Stark—give me some coins.”

“Huh? What for?”

“I want to buy a newspaper.”

Tony grimaced. “A newspaper? They still make those? That’s sooo twentieth century, doll. Look, you can get all the news you can stomach on this—” Tony pulled out his smart phone, but Loki waved it away. 

“I want a newspaper! Hand over the money, surely you can spare a few cents.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Those are pretty twentieth century, too. But, let’s see...” He scrounged in his pockets and came up with a handful of quarters. “Here, knock yourself out. But, if there’s anything left over, I want it back.”

Loki muttered something, Tony thought he heard the words, “Cheap bastard,” and he grinned as he watched Loki amble outside to where the newspaper vending machine stood. “As if there was anything he could buy with a couple of quarters,” he thought to himself in amusement. He watched Loki stare at the coins in his hand, drop them in the box, and bend down to take his paper. Then,Tony noticed something that pulled his attention toward the door, and a chill went through his bones.

*****

Loki stood before the vending machine and studied the sign stating how much a newspaper cost. He then looked at the coins in his hand and carefully counted them out. He had made a point of acquainting himself with Midgardian currency when he first began traveling the universe after his banishment, but he’d had little use for small change then, and it took him a moment to determine the correct amount. He dropped the coins in the slot one by one, liking the satisfying little clinks they made when they hit bottom, and then he pulled on the door, opening it. Pleased, he bent down and reached in to select his paper. Just then, he heard a disturbingly familiar male voice.

“What makes you so sure he’s here?”

An equally familiar and disturbing female voice answered. “Jarvis said he went for lox, and that he left on foot. This is the only deli within walking distance of Stark Tower. Come on, I’m dying for caffeine. Even if we’re wrong, at least we can get a decent cup of coffee.”

“Always looking on the bright side.” The male voice had a decidedly grim tone to it.

Loki waited until the pair went into the deli before emerging from the newspaper machine, holding the newspaper in front of him. He cautiously peeked in the window; yes, it was just as he’d thought—Clint Barton and Natasha Romanov. His heart sank. It had been such a nice morning, of course something would happen to spoil it. He watched them stride over to his and Tony’s table. He wasn’t sure if they were seeking him or Tony, but regardless, they weren’t going to greet him with glad tidings and a smile, he was certain of that.

What to do? He could take off and go... where? Back to Stark Tower? If they were on the hunt for him, they’d find him there soon enough. Just wander off into the streets of Manhattan? With no magic and fifty cents to his name? Not very appealing. Anyway, he wasn’t a coward. He wouldn’t run. In the old days, he’d have simply blasted them with a ball of seidr, sending them to the polar ice caps or somewhere, or maybe he’d have marched right up to them and taken whatever puny weapons they decided to attack him with and turn them on them in a trice, no magic needed.

But, those days were over. Even if he hadn’t been on probation, he was still carrying Stark’s child. He ran a hand over his belly and sighed. No, he couldn’t risk harming the baby. He should just walk away. But, what would Tony do? Surely he’d know how to handle them, to send them quickly on their way. Loki would just stay where he was for the moment, perhaps Tony would give him a signal. But as he watched, he saw Tony rise with a welcoming grin on his face and give each of them a big hug. He gestured for them to pull up extra chairs and sit, and soon they were deep in conversation.

And just like that, Loki felt more alone than he’d ever felt in his life.

********

Two hours earlier...

Clint and Natasha entered the helicarrier, tired, dirty, and a little pissed off, well, Clint was, anyway. They were led to a conference room and told to take a seat, and Clint shot a disgusted look at Natasha. “You really think Fury’s going to take this seriously?”

The redhead shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe. Depends on how crazy you sound when you tell him.”

Clint rolled his eyes and sighed as he leaned back in his chair. “I’m not a great judge of that these days. Maybe you can give me a nudge if I go off in too weird a direction.”

“My pleasure,” Natasha said with a grin. 

Nick Fury strode into the room. “Good morning. And, how are we this fine day?”

“We completed the mission, we’re alive with no missing body parts, so we’re great,” Natasha answered.

“Very good. Let me get somebody in here to handle the recording and you can give me the low-down. Coffee?”

Clint leaned forward and caught the director’s eye. “Nick. There’s something I need to discuss with you before we get to the report. Something I don’t want recorded. It’s... personal, sort of. Nothing to do with the mission.” 

Fury stared at him a moment. “All right. Go ahead.”

Clint drew in a long breath. “You’re probably going to think I’m crazy, and maybe I am. But...” He seemed to lose his momentum, and Natasha watched the expression on his face turn guarded. She bit her lip, and then made the decision to speak.

“He’s been having, for lack of a better term, visions.”

“I beg your pardon?” Fury said evenly.

“I know, there are all kinds of explanations when someone sees and hears things that aren’t there. But, this is different,” Natasha continued. “I was with him when he went through a few of them. It wasn’t his imagination, sir. He wasn’t dreaming. There was something going on that he wasn’t in control of. Tell him, Clint.”

The archer took a deep breath and nodded. “Yeah. It was... It was kind of like when Loki took control of my mind, but it was just flashes of thoughts, like memories except I’ve never experienced anything like it at all. And no one was compelling me to do anything, it was just... It was like catching a snatch of a movie, only I was in it. It keeps happening, Nick. I don’t know what it means. I don’t like it. But, I don’t know what to do.”

“What kind of images are you seeing?” Fury asked carefully.

Clint shook his head. “Crazy stuff. It’s like I’m on another planet, there’s a force talking to me. I can’t see where it’s coming from, I can’t understand the words, but I’m filled with despair, with misery. It’s like... falling. Falling into nothingness. And there’s something evil behind it.” He dropped his head. “I know this sounds wacko.”

“How long has this been going on?” 

“A few months.”

“Why’d you wait until now to say something?”

“It was only happening once in a while at first, and it was kind of vague. Couldn’t put my finger on anything. I shrugged it off, thought I was just tired or stressed. But lately, it’s happening almost every day and the episodes are getting more vivid.”

Natasha put a hand on Clint’s shoulder. “I was thinking... What if this has something to do with Loki? I know he’s in prison on Asgard, but what if he’s still got some sort of connection to Clint? He probably doesn’t have anything else to do while he’s locked up, maybe he’s entertaining himself by playing with Clint’s mind.”

“Loki’s not in prison. He’s here,” Fury said.

Both agents looked up as if they’d been hit with a bolt of electricity. “Here?” they exclaimed in horrified unison.

“Yeah. The information is classified, but... I guess I can authorize you two, under the circumstances. He was released from prison after being rehabilitated on Asgard, but he was banished and has been traveling the universe ever since. He’s sort of settled down here. With Stark, by the way.”

“What?”

Fury nodded, an inscrutable look on his face. “He did the Earth a big favor, and we awarded him amnesty, so... Don’t freak out if you run into him.”

Both agents were staring in shock. 

Then, Fury grinned. “Oh, and there’s more. Apparently, Stark got him pregnant.”

The shock deepened on Clint’s face, but after a stunned moment, Natasha broke into laughter. “You have got to be kidding.”

“Nope. I don’t get it, but they’re a couple, with a bun in the Asgardian oven.”

“This is insane.” Clint’s voice was rough with repressed anger. “That bastard ought to be dead, and you’re telling me he’s Stark’s, what, boyfriend?” Another wave of shock went through the archer and he slumped down in his chair.

Fury shrugged disinterestedly. “I’m over it, guys. What Stark does on his own time is his business, and Loki’s no longer a threat, supposedly. So, I don’t give a shit. But as far as what you’re experiencing? Maybe you need to consult with the trickster. He might indeed be having a little fun at your expense.”

“Can the report wait, sir?” Natasha asked. “I’d like to head over to Stark’s right away.”

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

“Thank you. Come on, Hawkeye. Let’s see if we can shed some light on what’s been happening to you.”

Clint allowed Natasha to take his hand and pull him to his feet. He followed her to the door, but then turned and gave Fury a dire look. “So, you’re saying I can’t kill the bastard?”

“No. Feel free to tell him what you think of him, though.” He let Clint walk a few paces before calling out, “I’d suggest waiting until after he fixes your problem, of course.” He laughed grimly.

Clint heaved a defeated sigh and followed Natasha to the exit.

******

Loki tucked his paper under his arm, leaned against the brick wall and stared down at the pavement. How could Tony do this to him? Surely he remembered Loki’s history with Barton, knew how the archer must crave revenge. And the woman... She’d kill him without a second thought if she got the chance. And yet, there was Tony, chatting companionably with them, leaving Loki out there on the sidewalk like a ragged alley cat. He wasn’t sure how long he stood there, feeling dazed and betrayed, but he finally took a deep breath and started to walk, just walk. He’d only gotten a few yards along when he felt a hand on his arm. He looked back to see Tony frowning at him.

“Where’re you going? Come on back in, we’ve got company for breakfast.”

A little flare of anger ran through Loki. “So I observed. What, exactly, do you think they’re going to do when they see you with me?”

“It’s fine! They got the whole story from Fury, they know everything’s cool.” 

“Then, what are they doing here?”

Tony shook his head. “I’m not exactly sure, but Hawkeye’s got a problem and he seems to think you might be able to help.”

Loki’s eyes narrowed and he sneered, “He’s coming to me for help? Oh, no. I don’t trust that at all. I’m just going to disappear for a while, and—”

“Babe.” Tony squeezed Loki’s arm. “You know I wouldn’t let anyone endanger you or the baby. It’s okay, I swear. Trust me.”

Loki was breathing heavily, fighting down a fight-or-flight response. “All right,” he said finally. “But keep this in mind—if there’s the slightest threat to our child’s wellbeing, I’ll do whatever is necessary to protect it. And, if that means harming a mortal, my fath—Odin will put an end to me.” He looked searchingly into Tony’s eyes. “You do understand what’s at stake here, yes?”

“I do. And, nothing bad is going to happen. I’ll make sure of it.” Tony held Loki’s gaze until he felt him calm down. “Neither of them would harm an expectant... person. I promise, they’re not going to do anything but drink coffee, split a Danish, and talk. Okay?”

Reluctantly, Loki walked back to the deli with Tony keeping a grip on his elbow. When they arrived, Loki stared in the window and saw the pair eyeing him. Barton had a malevolent look on his face, but Romanov looked almost cheerful. Loki let a breath out slowly. “You’d better be sure, Stark.”

“I am. Although, it wouldn’t hurt for you to, you know—be nice.”

Loki grunted. “I’ll be my usual charming self.”

“Uh—yeah, maybe turn that up a notch.”

Loki nodded, and they went inside to their table.


	26. Not Exactly a Gabfest

Loki paused in front of the deli door, head bowed, a worn look to his stance. “You’d have me do this,” he said over his shoulder to Tony. It wasn’t a question, or even an expression of disgust or repulsion. It was just a touchpoint, a confirmation. 

 

“Yeah,” Tony said into his ear, the word barely audible over the noise of the city. “It’s okay.” He gave Loki’s pony tail a playful tug. “Trust me.”

 

Loki sneered in response before reaching for the handle, and Tony watched as he straightened to his full height. He squared his shoulders, threw his head back, and Tony was reminded of the windswept, elegant bastard-god who’d appeared in his kitchen all those months ago. Loki opened the door, and he didn’t look tired or unsure anymore—he was young and strong, and he strode inside undaunted, a king in jeans and sneakers come to address his lowly subjects.

 

A smile crossed Tony’s face; “That’s my boy,” he thought admiringly. “He may have lost his kingdom, but, damn, royalty’s in his blood.” He followed Loki as the god sauntered to the table where the two agents were seated. 

 

Clint and Natasha watched him approach, Natasha with a glint of humor in her eyes, but Clint looked taut, poised for confrontation. There was no mistaking the steel in _his_ eyes, and a crackling silence fell around them. Maybe the jaded New Yorkers sensed something in the air, or maybe they just knew what the moments before a street fight looked like, but people scooted away, casting covert glances at the table, waiting for a sign telling them it was time to take cover.

 

“Good morning,” Loki said in a smooth, vaguely mocking tone. “I understand you seek assistance.” He tipped his head at Clint. “What need have you of me?”

 

Clint’s jaw locked up and a vein in his forehead jumped, but Natasha coolly looked Loki up and down, feigning absolute normalcy. It wasn’t that she was afraid; Tony had sworn Loki wouldn’t use magic against them, and that he would take full responsibility for keeping the trickster in line. It was just that she, more than anyone, knew what Clint had suffered at Loki’s hands, and there was a tiny bit of doubt in the back of her mind that he’d be able to keep control over his rage while sitting across the table from his former tormentor. Still, she had faith, and an exit plan, and she flashed Loki a wicked grin. “Wow. That’s a different look for you, isn’t it? Did Tony pick out the outfit?”

 

“Come on, Tash,” Tony said firmly. “Nobody wants trouble. Let’s get this over with.”

 

“Just trying to break the ice. But, yes. Gentlemen, why don’t you sit down? Plenty of room at the table.”

 

For a moment, it seemed everyone was frozen in place, but then Loki fluidly slid into a chair and Tony did the same. Still, no one spoke—Clint wouldn’t take his eyes off his coffee cup, Loki crossed his legs and folded his hands, apparently perfectly happy to wait everyone else out, and Tony studied the ceiling, unable to come up with an opening line that wouldn’t piss somebody off—and finally, Natasha cut through the silence. “Okay, well, I hate to interrupt the gabfest, but I want a refill. Anybody need anything while I’m up? ...No? Okay. I’ll just be a minute.” She stood, and then paused to add, “Don’t stop talking on my account, I’ll pick up the gist when I get back.” The men gave her a baleful look, and Natasha rolled her eyes as she went to the counter for more coffee.

 

She kept an eye on the three even as she pressed the button on the pump pot and refilled her cup. When she returned, they still weren’t speaking. She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table with her cup clasped in her hands and she blew a cooling breath across the steaming beverage. Clint sat close beside her and she could feel the tension reverberating through his body. She was beginning to fear he would snap like an overwound guitar string if someone didn’t give, so she said, “Clint’s been having visions,” as casually as if announcing that the PTA bake sale had been a big success.

 

Loki frowned interestedly. “What sort of visions?”

 

“He—”

 

“I can speak for myself,” Clint growled. He trained a laser glare on Loki. “I’m seeing—and feeling—weird shit. Voices, images, like memories, but none of this crap ever happened to me. I don’t think it could have ever happened to anyone... human.” He looked back down at his coffee cup, rolling it between his palms. Then he jerked his gaze back to Loki. “It’s like someone’s pushing these, yeah, _visions_ into my brain, and I can’t ignore them, I can’t turn them off. And, they’re getting worse.” He was silent for a moment, his breath coming fast. “You fucked with my mind before, asshole. What are you doing to it now?”

 

Loki thoughtfully regarded Clint for a long moment before speaking. “Hmm. You think I’m causing these illusions to appear in your head. I suppose that’s a logical conclusion, but you’re wrong. Even if I had a purpose for your somewhat limited skills and talents, which I no longer do, it’s impossible. I’d need the power of the Tesseract to accomplish such a thing.” 

 

Tony smiled broadly. “Well, okay, then! Hey, Tash, Hawk, great seeing you, sorry we couldn’t help. Hate to run, but Loki and I have a lot to do, cribs to buy, nurseries to paint, you know how it is with a kid on the way. Later!” Tony made to stand up, but Natasha put a firm hand on his arm.

 

“Down, boy. We’re not done.”

 

Clint’s expression had turned murderous, Loki was staring at Tony with a bewildered look—Tony had said nothing about preparing the nursery that day, they hadn’t even discussed where the nursery would _be_ yet _—_ and Tony flinched at Natasha’s touch, but just as the mood was turning truly ugly, everyone started as a crash of thunder resounded somewhere outside the deli. 

 

Moments later, Thor came striding in, cape flowing behind him. He stood with his hands on his hips, Mjolnir swinging from his wrist, and surveyed the scene. He brightened when he spotted his brother and friends; the deli patrons stared at him for a moment and then went back to their breakfast doings without a second look. Thor laughed heartily.

 

“Good morn, my dear friends! And, Brother! This is a fine sight, seeing the four of you taking a meal together.” Thor wrapped a thick arm around Loki’s neck and squeezed affectionately, causing Loki to make a strangled noise, and then Thor grabbed a chair and pulled it up to the table. He missed Loki’s disgusted scowl, and seemed oblivious to the tension among the other three. “I’m so glad to have found you, Loki. Searching for someone in this city is akin to identifying a mending device among a pile of straw.”

 

“That’s a needle in a haystack, you imbecile,” Loki hissed.

 

Thor just gave Loki a raised eyebrow and then beamed at the rest of the group. “How does one go about procuring a cup of coffee in this establishment?”

 

“I’ll get you one,” Natasha said tiredly. She gestured at Clint and Loki. “Keep an eye on those two for me.”

 

A concerned frown crossed Thor’s face. “Is there trouble? Loki, what have you done?”

 

“Nothing!” Loki snapped. 

 

“Clint’s having issues,” Tony supplied helpfully.

 

“Because of _him!”_ Clint snarled, jerking a thumb in Loki’s direction.

 

The heat began to rise between the two men, but Thor held up his hand. “Please, I’m sure there’s nothing we can’t work out if we just stay calm and address one another with respect. What sort of... issues are you experiencing, Archer?”

 

Natasha returned with an extra-large mug of coffee for Thor and she said, “We think Loki still has a hold on Clint’s mind, but he says he doesn’t. Discuss.”

 

Thor frowned. “I see.” He turned to look at Loki with an appraising eye. “Well, that is very interesting, because I’ve come to speak with you about a similar affliction that has befallen Dr. Erik Selvig.”

 

“What are you talking about?” Tony asked.

 

“It’s the reason I’m here—Jane sent me. It seems the good doctor also has been experiencing strange visions. I immediately assumed Loki had something to do with it, given that he’d taken control of Selvig’s mind once before.”

 

Loki slammed down his fist. “By the Nine! Do you all think I’ve had nothing better to do with my time than play puppet master with a menagerie of mortals? I have no use for any of you! Well, except for Stark, but the point is, I’m doing nothing to affect anyone’s fragile Midgardian mind, and have no interest in doing so, even if I could! Which I _cannot.”_ He drummed his index finger on the table for emphasis.

 

“Well, I’m sorry, but this is getting a little too coincidental,” Natasha said evenly. “If Selvig and Hawkeye are both going through this, and the one factor they have in common is what you did to them, then I’m going to say the evidence points directly at you.”

 

“Yeah,” Clint said, sounding almost pleased. “We all know what a fucking liar you are—of course you’re not going to admit to anything. But, it’s obvious. And, when I report this to Fury, your amnesty’s going to be revoked, you’ll be locked up, and once that kid’s out of you, we’ll find a way to make you fix this shit, whether you like it or not.”

 

Loki stared incredulously around the table. Then he sat back, nodding knowingly. “Oh, I see. No one believes me. Not one of you? My own brother?” He turned to look Thor in the eye. “Thor, I swear to you—I’ve nothing to do with this. Can you not take my side for once?”

 

Thor gravely shook his head. “I’m sorry, Loki, but I cannot. Who else could be responsible for this? The Lady Natasha is right. The evidence points to you.”

 

Loki was overcome by the same futile feeling he’d had so many times as a child. Once he’d pulled a few pranks, once his talent for _seidr_ was recognized, he was always the first one to be blamed for any mishaps around the palace, and no amount of protesting his innocence would help. Thus, he’d become known for his silver tongue, for finding a way out of punishment through a clever tale, because if he hadn’t, he’d have spent his entire childhood confined to his room. 

 

Unfortunately, now, he couldn’t summon up a single plausible explanation. Perhaps there simply wasn’t one. But it hurt knowing that, even after working so hard to change his life for the better, there wasn’t one person at the table willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.

 

He set his jaw, determined not to let his dismay show through, but it was hard to keep his voice steady. “I have nothing to offer in my defense but my word. And, I know that is worthless to all of you.” He looked directly at Tony. “Even you,” he said softly. He raised his hands in a helpless shrug, a horrible feeling of inevitability coming over him as he realized he could very well end up rotting in a cell for the rest of his life, if no one could figure out the cause of the two men’s distress. He unconsciously rubbed his stomach, and tears sprang into his eyes at the thought of having his child taken from him at birth. Then, he felt Tony’s hand on his.

 

“Look at me,” Tony said.

 

Loki raised his eyes. There was a grim set to Tony’s mouth, and his eyes flashed with intensity. “I believe you, Loki. I know you wouldn’t do this. There’s another explanation, and we’ll figure it out. We just don’t have all the facts yet. In the meantime, no one’s taking you away from me.” He turned back to face Clint. “I love you, man, but if I have to put on the suit, I will. Loki hasn’t done anything wrong. I’d stake my life on it.” He turned back to Loki. “Your word’s good enough for me, babe. Always.” He squeezed Loki’s hand reassuringly.

 

Loki felt his lips tremble as he smiled. _Tony believed him!_ Relief and joy flooded Loki’s very core. It was as if all those childhood hurts had been packed in a trunk and dropped into the sea. Tony not only loved him, but he really, truly trusted him, trusted him enough to take his word over the evidence at hand and stand up to his friends. Loki thought he might dissolve into a puddle of sheer happiness.

 

And, at just that moment, Clint gasped and thrust himself away from the table. Everyone stared at him; his eyes rolled back in his head and he began babbling something in a language that wasn’t English. Natasha began speaking soothingly in  Clint’s ear, but he shook and trembled in his seat, seemingly unaware of her presence. She finally grasped both his hands and called his name more and more loudly and he gradually began to settle and grow quiet. Even then, he had a look of terror on his face that disturbed even Loki.

 

“I swear I’m not doing that,” Loki said firmly. Natasha gave him a sour look, but Thor nodded.

 

“No, you are not,” he agreed.

 

“How can you say that?” Natasha snapped. “What makes you think we could tell if he was?”

 

Thor started to answer, but his cell phone rang. He fished around in his armor to find it, checked the number and pressed “talk.” “Hello, Jane dearest.” The others could hear Jane Foster excitedly talking, and Thor’s brow pulled into a frown. He listened without speaking for a while, and then said, “I understand,” in a resolute tone. He hung up and announced, “Dr. Selvig is also suffering an attack, and from Jane’s description, he is experiencing the exact same effects.”

 

“Well, that’s it, then,” Natasha said sharply. “Loki’s got to be behind it.”

 

Before Loki could protest, Thor straightened in his seat and said, “No. What I have forgotten is that the Allfather would have been informed long ago if Loki was manipulating a human’s consciousness again. He would never allow it. Loki would be...” He gave his brother a regretful nod. “...suffering dire punishment by now. Yet, he is not. Therefore, I agree with the Man of Iron—Loki is innocent.”

 

“Wait.” Natasha waggled a finger. “Okay, so maybe he’s not doing anything on purpose—but, surely there’s a connection! Doesn’t your girlfriend have any ideas about what’s going on?”

 

Thor shook his head gravely. “She is as bewildered as I am. And, she is quite insistent that I find a way to end these episodes. She fears Dr. Selvig’s heart might not stand up to too many more of them.” He looked at Loki. “Brother, do you have any idea what is taking place here? And how to stop it?”

 

Loki bit his lip and shrugged uncertainly. “From what I’ve just witnessed, it would seem that some of my most dreadful memories... are somehow occurring in the minds of these two men. I can only speculate that some sort of connection between us persists due to the power of the Tessaract. But, I have not the least idea how to destroy it, if indeed that is the case, and no resources that might offer guidance.” 

 

He looked Clint right in the eye. “Please know... I am sorry for what I did, and I am sorry for what is happening to you now. I wouldn’t wish those memories on my worst enemy.” He gave Clint a look of sincere remorse, and then turned to Thor. “It is up to you, brother. You must discover a solution. I’m severely limited in my current state, but I’ll do anything I can to help.”

 

Seeing Loki truly regret his own actions left Thor amazed—he’d never seen that emotion in Loki’s eyes before, and it did his soul good to see it. Thank the gods he’d been right to believe his beloved little brother was still alive somewhere inside the madman he’d become, and gratitude to his father for finding treatment for him. He gave Loki a small smile and nodded understandingly before speaking.

 

“All right,” Thor said. “It is clear to me that we here do not have the knowledge needed to remedy the situation. But, there is one who surely does.” He rose to his feet. “I must go.”

 

“Where are you going?” Natasha demanded.

 

“To Asgard.” Thor nodded at her, Tony, and Clint, squeezed Loki’s shoulder and strode out of the deli. The building rattled as Thor departed, and the four left behind stared from one to the other. 

 

Clint shakily took a long drink of coffee and tried to wrap his battered mind around the fact that Loki— _Loki_ —had apologized to him. 

 

 

 


	27. Go Ask Your Mother

Heimdall stood in his most favored Asgard-watching spot. All had been quiet for days—weeks—months, really. Of course, he was grateful. But it was a bit of a challenge to maintain a keen eye with nothing to engage his senses. He idly cast his gaze to the far beyond and smiled slightly to see Thor with his Midgardian friends, and, interestingly, with Loki. He hadn’t seen either prince up close for quite a while, and he wondered how Thor’s romance with Jane was going, and also if Loki was truly behaving himself. 

Heimdall had been pondering the fallen prince’s recent apology quite a bit. He believed it was sincere, and it called into question some of the watcher’s previous assumptions. Perhaps he had been a bit hasty in forming an opinion during Loki’s growing up years—he recalled more than a few instances where it appeared to him that Loki could have used a friend, and he had failed to offer a sympathetic ear, thinking the smart-mouthed lad deserved to be taken down a peg. Now, he wondered what would have happened if only he’d offered the young god a few kind words and a bit of impartial guidance, wondered whether things might have gone differently for him... and for so many others.

Heimdall sighed. Probably not. Loki had shown he could be headstrong and self-assured to a megalomanic degree, and Heimdall doubted he would have listened to him, even as a youth. 

But now, he wished he had at least tried.

All regretful thoughts were unexpectedly pushed aside as the God of Thunder called upon him to open the bifrost. Heimdall hastened to make way for him and he smiled delightedly when Thor subsequently appeared before him. “Ah, my Prince! At last you have returned to us. It is good to see you.”

“And you as well,” Thor agreed cheerfully. He paused a moment to gather his thoughts and then he spoke in a more somber tone. “I have need of the Allfather’s counsel. Where can I find him?”

“He was relaxing in his chambers this morn. I believe he is still there.”

“Excellent.” He flashed a cheeky grin. “Then, I shall hasten to disturb his peace.”

Heimdall chuckled. “I suspect he will welcome it. Things have been entirely too placid around here lately. I’m sure he’ll be glad for the distraction.” He gave Thor entrance to the kingdom, and then he returned to his musings, resuming his watchful stance.

*****

Odin was seated at a stately wooden desk the size of a medium-sized Midgardian car. He had a jeweler’s loupe in his remaining eye and was closely peering at a golden locket. Others jewelry pieces lay before him, some still in a presentation box, others clearly cast aside. The Allfather looked up as Thor entered, letting the loupe fall into his hand. “Ah, my son. I’m glad you’re here. What do you think of this one? Is it too plain for your mother’s taste?” He dangled the locket in question from his forefinger and held it out to Thor.

Thor smiled indulgently. “I have a matter of great importance upon which I need to confer with you, Father. You would have me fritter away our time together examining baubles?”

“Your calm demeanor tells me that the matter is less than urgent. Believe me, soothing your mother’s fiery anger at my having forgotten the third millennial of our wedding vows is of greater importance to me than whatever travails your human friends are suffering. Now, I asked your opinion and I will have it.” He again gestured at Thor with the locket. “How would this one be received, do you think?”

Thor rolled his eyes, but took the loupe from his father and stared into it at the gold pendant. On first glance, it appeared to be an otherwise simple piece with an intricately carved rose at the top. But with magnification, Thor could see the flower’s stem was actually two intertwined snakes with their heads forming the leaves. Thor smiled slightly and nodded. “I think she would love it.”

“My thoughts exactly.” Odin made a huff of satisfaction as he took back the locket and placed it in a gift box. “Now. What seems to be the trouble?”

Thor sat in a large chair upholstered with deerskin and took a deep breath. “You may recall that during Loki’s attack on Midgard, he used the power of the Tessaract to control two human’s minds in order to have them do his bidding. Yes?”

“Oh, yes... Such foolishness.” Odin leaned back in his chair and stared out the window, clearly not interested in dwelling on his adopted son’s previous misdeeds.

“Well, unfortunately, the two men affected are now experiencing some sort of residual... connection with Loki’s mind. It causes them great distress, and the elder, Dr. Selvig, is in ill health. If these episodes continue, his heart could fail.” Thor waited expectantly for a response from his father, but the older man just continued to gaze out into his kingdom. 

Thor shifted impatiently. “Do you understand the gravity of the situation, Father? Dr. Selvig is very close to me and my lady Jane, and the other man is a valued compatriot of mine. I wish to end their suffering. I brought the matter to Loki, but without his seidr, he hasn’t the skill or knowledge to devise a remedy, and neither does anyone else on Midgard. So, I’ve come to you for assistance.” 

Odin made no move to acknowledge Thor’s question. Thor waited with pursed lips until he could stand it no more. “You are the Allfather, but I am your son. Must I beg for your attention like a commoner?” he said in exasperation. His words hung in the air, and he knew he was sounding like a demanding brat—a technique that never went over very well with his father, but he couldn’t help it. Still, he forced himself to calm down and in a more respectful voice he added, “Father, please. Won’t you help me?”

Odin settled deeper into his chair and stayed silent for several more moments. He then turned and looked Thor in the eye. “No,” was all he said.

Thor made an annoyed growl under his breath. “But, why? Is it because you wish Loki to discover the solution for himself? I just told you, he has no resources available to him!”

Odin sniffed a bit, a sly twist on his lips. “No, clever boy, it is because I’ll have no truck with Midgardian goings-on. I no longer oversee their insignificant little realm and have no desire to be mixed up in their inconsequential struggles and triumphs. Clearly, I have a son who is quite eager to tend to them, so don’t waste my time begging me to interfere with whatever trouble they’ve gotten themselves into lately. You can handle it perfectly well, I’m sure.”

Thor fought back rising ire, trying to focus on the meaning beneath his father’s blase attitude and finding himself completely flummoxed. “But, I cannot! I know nothing of the sorcery Loki employed to gain control over Selvig and Barton’s minds. That is the sort of thing you are well familiar with, and seeing that it was your son who brought about this trouble in the first place, I see no reason why you shouldn’t feel responsibility toward the mortals who were harmed.”

“If it was my ‘son’s’ doing, he should be the one to un-do it.”

“But, his magic is unstable due to his condition, you know that! If the humans were harmed in the process of him trying to help them, you’d—” Thor caught himself as realization set in and his eyes narrowed. “Oh, gods. That’s what you want, isn’t it? For Loki to inadvertently violate the terms of his probation so that you can punish him? So that you can at last put him to death, regardless of Mother’s—or my—protests.” Disappointment and anger came over him. “How could you?” 

Odin turned a disgusted grimace on Thor. “Is that what you think of me? That I’m sitting here in this chamber, gleefully rubbing my hands together, waiting for Loki to fail once again? In spite of everything, I still consider him to be my son—and always will. Do you not know that my heart was broken by his terrible fall, and that I wanted nothing more than for him to somehow save himself? Yet, think of what he did instead. 

“And then, when you brought him back to me, he had no remorse, no desire to right things—so I had no choice but to punish him. But you and his mother believed in him and together, we found a way to get through to him. And, I have been so proud of him, of what he’s made of his life these last few months.” The gusto behind his impassioned speech petered out and he spoke softy. “I would do anything to make sure he has continued success. But, whether he wishes to attempt to help your friends or not, I cannot interfere. It is his choice.”

“It is not his choice if he has no clue as to how to go about it! Can you not offer guidance? At least, tell me of a place where I can go to learn of a solution. It can’t be that difficult, surely?”

Odin was again silent for a time. Finally, he gave a resigned sigh followed by a grim chuckle. “How persistent you are. You won’t allow me the slightest chance to maintain the illusion of the all-knowing king.” He met Thor’s eyes again, and this time the pain of truth was evident in his countenance. “The fact is... I have no guidance to offer.”

“What do you mean?”

“Loki’s ability to rule other men’s minds was only possible due to the power lent to him by the Tessaract...” Odin dropped his gaze. “...and I have no knowledge of the intricacies of that stone’s powers.”

Thor stared at his father with an incredulous expression. “Oh, gods. You’re saying you don’t know what to do?”

Odin snapped, “I know its value full well! I know how others have employed it, for good, for evil. However, I do not know how to use it to perform tricks of the mind on easily-led Midgardians." Odin shrugged. “Sorry.”

“You’re sorry? A man could die!” Thor swiped a hand over his mouth, feeling a burst of frustration course through him. “All right. Well, there has to be someone who can help, someone who knows about such things, someone who can—”

“Talk to your mother,” Odin said simply. He went back to evaluating the jewelry laid out on the desk in front of him.

Thor gaped at him for a moment, and then disgustedly rose from his chair. He went out into the hall to find Frigga.

******

After Thor’s departure, the three Avengers and Loki continued to sit around the deli table, now in benumbed silence. This time, it was Tony who broke it up, addressing Clint and Natasha. 

“Well, okay. Thor’s on the case and there’s not much we can do here. Carry on with your day, people. The minute I hear from His Honor, I’ll let you know.”

“You think I’m going to let that bastard out of my sight?” Clint demanded, gesturing at Loki.

“He’s not going anywhere that I can’t find him,” Tony responded crisply. “And he already told you he can’t help you. So, we might as well all go home, get drunk and watch some Netflix in comfort.”

Natasha smiled at the thought. “That actually sounds like a really good idea. Come on, Hawk. I could use a drink and I bet you could too. It’s noon somewhere.”

“What about him?” Clint asked, again pointing at Loki.

“Stark’ll keep tabs on him. Let’s go, before Fury decides he needs that mission report in the next ten minutes.”

Clint snorted as he fixed a baleful look on Loki, but allowed the redhead to lead him out of the deli.

When they were gone, Tony gave Loki an appraising look, and he didn’t like what he saw. Loki looked drained, sitting glumly slumped in his chair with his chin resting in his hand, all the regal-ness about him wilted. Tony popped up into a standing position and took Loki’s arm. “Come on, babe. Let’s go home. You look like you could use a nap, big time.”

“I am feeling a little worn,” Loki admitted. He rose and followed Tony to the door.

They left the deli and headed toward Stark Tower. This time, the walk was more of a trudge, as Loki didn’t speak other than to make noncommittal “hmm’s” whenever Tony tried to start a conversation.

Seeing Loki so subdued tore at Tony’s heart. He’d finally had an entire morning with the part of Loki that had, up to now, only been doled out in short spurts, tantalizing glimpses of a young man enjoying life, having fun with his partner and looking forward to the future. 

Now it was as if a giant boulder had been set on top of Loki’s shoulders. Tony gave his neck an affectionate squeeze.

“Hey, cheer up. Everything’s going to be okay.”

A delicate eyebrow raised and Loki huffed sarcastically. “Oh, really? Such an optimist. I believe there’s a very large probability that things aren’t going to be okay in the least.”

“Why?” Tony demanded.

“Because.” 

As a rule, Loki’s flair for the melodramatic tended to make Tony dismiss half of his dire predictions, but he really did seem to have had his legs knocked out of him by the morning’s events, and Tony felt a twinge of discomfort himself. “Because why? I need specifics if I’m going to join you in your little angst-fest.”

“Because Thor is going to Odin to ask for help. You know as well as I do that Odin isn’t going to lift a bloody finger to help me. In fact, I imagine he’ll find a way to use this against me.”

“How?”

“Let’s say Selvig dies as a result of one of his visions—”

“I’d rather not say that, but okay. Go on.”

Loki shot Tony a grim look and stopped in the middle of the busy sidewalk. “From that, Odin could very well extrapolate that I was responsible for a mortal’s death. Therefore, I will have violated the terms of my probation, and ta-da! The universe will be short one stunningly handsome god of mischief. Which is precisely what the bastard’s been hoping for all along.” Loki’s eyes held Tony’s for a moment longer, the anguish in them betraying his cool delivery of that bit of speculation.

For a moment, Tony wanted to punch the daylights out of Clint Barton. This was all his fault, bringing this distress into their lives. He shoved the thought aside and focused instead on getting Loki out of his fatalistic mood.

“No way, babe. I know Odin’s a douche bag-extraordinaire, but even he couldn’t make that charge stick. It wouldn’t be fair to blame you for an after-effect you have no control over.”

“Just so you know, Odin’s interest in fairness is underwhelming.”

“Your mom won’t let him.”

Loki pondered that for a moment, and then a small smile tugged at his lips. “Well... that’s true. And Thor will take care to represent the facts correctly, seeing that he’s invested in my continued success. He’d hate to lose his gamble that I’m worth saving—wouldn’t give his future subjects a lot of confidence in his kingly judgment if he did.”

“That’s right!” Tony said enthusiastically. “Now, let’s shake a leg, I need vodka like you wouldn’t believe.” 

They strode onward toward home, but Tony’s elation at having cheered Loki up faded with every step. His ire at Barton crept back—he really wanted someone to take out his frustration on. Here he’d been enjoying what had been shaping up to be one of the nicest days he’d ever had in his life, and naturally, it got derailed by somebody needing something—something next to impossible—from him. Well, from Loki, but from Tony by extension.

And, in an uncharacteristic flash of self-awareness, he realized—shit like this was going to happen all the time once he had a kid.

Okay, maybe not exactly like this, but yeah. Kids got sick when dad planned a night on the town; they had important school events going on when he desperately needed a trip to the beach to clear his head; and just when he was about to enjoy a long overdue romantic interlude with his sweetie, the sound of a nightmare would fill the room through the baby monitor.

And, hell, even if he did put his own needs first, he’d probably spend the entire time feeling guilty. Guilt was not among Tony’s top ten favorite emotions... For the first time, he wondered if he’d even be able to do it. Would he, Tony Stark, billionaire philanthropist, etc., etc., ever be able to put aside his own selfish needs in order to take care of a child? A horrible sense of doubt hit him in the stomach like a sack of rotten potatoes. 

And, he suddenly became aware that Loki was staring at him.

“What?” Tony asked.

“You look sad,” Loki said accusingly. “I thought we decided to be happy again.”

Tony gave a weak grin. “You notice when I look sad?”

“Of course I do! Look at you, you’re doing it now! It’s disconcerting, and I don’t like it. Stop it this instant,” he ordered imperiously. After staring a moment longer—during which Tony’s expression didn’t change at all—he cocked his head and asked in a genuinely puzzled tone, “Why do you look sad?”

“It’s nothing.”

“Were you lying to me when you said everything was going to be all right?”

“No!”

A knowing look crossed the trickster’s face. “Oh, I know. You’re thinking of what happened back at the deli. Are you feeling ashamed that the archer was being rude and crass and terrible to me, yet you did nothing to defend me?”

“Uh... No?”

“Well, that’s unfortunate, because you should.”

“I figured you kids needed to learn to work out your differences for yourselves.”

Loki sneered at him. “I’m pregnant and hormonal! I shouldn’t be subjected to name calling and implications of evil-doing—I should be pampered and made much of, given gifts and ice cream, and told how attractive I am even with a few extra pounds on me.” With an irritable sniff, he ran his hand over his tummy and gave Tony a side-eye. “Or, am I mistaken about that?”

By now, they were at the Tower, and Tony chuckled. He took Loki’s arm and led him to the elevator. It opened immediately and once inside, Tony pulled him into his arms for a tight hug. “No, hot stuff, you’re not mistaken. You’re fucking gorgeous, and always will be, no matter what. As for those extra pounds, I love ‘em, because it means my baby’s growing strong and healthy inside you.” He pulled Loki’s head down so he could press their brows together. “I’m sorry Clint was mean to you—you’re right, I should have said something. And, I’ll get you all the ice cream you want, and presents too. I’ll... rub your back and draw you a hot bath, if that’ll make you feel better. Anything you want.” 

They pulled back to look at each other, and to Tony’s surprise, Loki was now grinning smugly. “Ah, see? Problem solved—now you don’t look sad at all. Aren’t things better when you’re fully occupied with worrying about my needs?” He mischievously lifted Tony’s chin and met the billionaire’s darkening eyes. “Next time you feel down, ask yourself this: Am I doing all I can to ensure Loki’s happiness? Is he comfortable? Is the temperature to his liking? Is he being sufficiently entertained? Most importantly, would he like something to eat? I’m certain if you’d just learn to focus on maintaining a useful line of thought such as that, you’d never feel sad again, and—ACK!” 

Tony shoved Loki against the wall of the elevator car —carefully though, so as not to hurt him—and filled his mouth with Tony’s tongue. They arrived at the living quarters floor and the doors opened. Tony walked Loki backwards, not taking his lips off of him until they reached the couch. Tony eased Loki down and settled himself on him, wriggling between his legs to keep his full weight off of Loki’s stomach. “You... are a serious pain in my ass,” he informed Loki.

“Hardly. To date, you haven’t allowed me even the tiniest bit of access to your ass.”

“There’s a reason for that. Tony Stark doesn’t bottom.”

Loki smiled up at him and gently caressed his face. “We’ll discuss that further after the baby’s born. For now—I really want to know. Why were you so sad?”

“Aw... I got to thinking about how much having a baby was going to change my life—I mean, our lives. How I wouldn’t be able to handle sacrificing all the stuff I like to do in order to take care of the kid’s needs.”

“Which is ridiculous. Look at how you take care of me.”

Tony looked down at his trickster and preened a little. “I am pretty good at it, aren’t I?”

“Oh, yes.” 

They kissed, and then Loki continued. “It’s because you love me. And, think how much you’re going to love that baby. I have a feeling it won’t seem like a sacrifice at all. Mostly.”

Well-worn laugh lines deepened on Tony’s face as he smiled. “Sometimes I forget how smart you are.”

“Mm, I am exceedingly smart,” Loki said modestly. Then he bared his teeth in a feral smile. “I’m also randy as hell.” He bucked his hips upward, rubbing his erection demandingly against Tony. “Take me to bed immediately.”

Tony laughed, delighted. “Ah, there it is. Smart, smart, smart.”

He took a moment to ravish Loki’s mouth a little more and then stood up and led him to their bedroom.


	28. We're Going to Jotunheim!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor talks to Frigga, and Tony and Loki have some good ol' Jotun sex.

Thor found his mother sitting on a balcony overlooking the palace courtyard. Her hands were busy with needlework and she appeared to be entirely focused on making tiny stitches to bind one piece of soft white fabric to another.

 

The serenity of the scene calmed Thor, and he paused a moment to drink it in before stealthily walking up and putting his arms around his mother’s shoulders. 

 

Frigga gave a pleased laugh. “Ah, Thor. I thought I sensed your sweet presence.” She turned with a merry grin for him and patted his arm. “I’ve missed you, dear.”

 

“And I, you. What’s that you’re working on?”

 

Frigga held up a small gown, sized just right for a baby. “For my grandchild. I suppose it will look odd and out of place on Midgard, but the cloth is woven with protection spells, and it is intended to swathe the babe while it sleeps, so I imagine it will find plenty of use.”

 

Thor smiled fondly. “You are anticipating this child with great pleasure, I see.”

 

“Of course! I’ve always wanted grandchildren.” A sly smile crossed her lips. “I don’t suppose you’ve made any progress in that direction, hmm?”

 

Thor sheepishly huffed and shook his head. “I have far too many other matters to attend to at this time, as does the fairest Jane. One day, however...”

 

“Oh, I know. I’m counting on it.” Frigga folded up the small garment and leaned down to put it away in her sewing case. “Speaking of other matters, what brings you here so unexpectedly, my love?” She straightened and caught his eye, her tone now serious. “What troubles you?”

 

Thor drew in a great breath and then gave his mother a rundown on the situation back on Earth, finishing with the frustrating conversation he’d had with Odin. “He told me to talk to you,” he added sourly.

 

Frigga crossed her legs and leaned back in her chair, a deep frown etched on her lovely face. “Me? How strange. Odin knows I have no experience with the Tessaract. I can’t imagine why he’d—” Her eyes widened as a thought came to her. “Oh! Oh, dear. Surely he doesn’t think...” She pondered a moment and then pursed her lips and threw up her hands in disgust. “That sly son-of-a-bitch.” 

 

“Mother! He is the Allfather!” Thor said, aghast.

 

“He’s also my husband, and a bit of an ass, in case you haven’t noticed. I know what he’s up to. Damn him.” Frigga stood up and gestured for Thor to follow her as she strode purposefully into the palace. They walked to her personal quarters and once inside, she went to a bookcase and pulled out the same ancient tome Thor remembered from when they went to Midgard to tend to Loki. Frigga carried it to a large oak table and sat down in front of it, patting a second chair for Thor’s use. He lowered himself heavily and pointed at the book.

 

“What is going on? That book is about the Jotun people, is it not?”

 

“Yes, yes.” Frigga impatiently waved at him to quiet himself. She now wore a preoccupied scowl and for some minutes, all was silent except for the soft swoosh of fragile pages being carefully turned one after the other. Eventually, the Allmother settled in to read, tracing line after line of dark runes with her forefinger. Once she’d gone through several pages, she made a satisfied sound and sat back. She crossed her arms, fixing her gaze across the room, clearly deep in thought. Thor sat pensively, wishing she’d say something. Just when he thought he’d burst a blood vessel, Frigga turned to him and announced, “Ready yourself, son. We’re going to Jotunheim.”

 

* * *

 

 

Loki and Tony managed to make it to their bedroom before hastily skinning out of their clothes and falling onto the bed. They grappled together, each desperate to feel the other’s bare skin against his own. Loki’s libido had done nothing but smolder hotly inside him ever since his tummy began to swell, and by now he badly needed to rut. He would have liked to think it was his deep abiding love and attraction for Tony that created such an overwhelming ache, but he knew that at this point, it was just his traitorous and hormonal body demanding sexual release that was driving him.

 

“By the gods, prepare me, Stark, but be quick about it.” Loki flipped over on his stomach and raised his haunches, offering himself to Tony in as aggressive a manner as Tony had ever seen.

 

“Hey, chill out there, Rudolph, this is supposed to be romantic, isn’t it?”

 

“Romance is for people whose blood isn’t boiling in their veins. Just fuck me, already.” He glanced behind himself and noted with satisfaction that Tony had fished the lube out of a bedside drawer and was about to coat his fingers with it. Then something occurred to him.

 

“Wait!” Loki snapped. He flipped onto his back again. “I want to... That is, I _need_ to—well, only if you don’t object, of course, I mean, either way is fine, but—”

 

“Hold on, Lassie, I don’t follow. Is Timmy down the well again?” Tony asked with a raised eyebrow. “What are you trying to say?”

 

Loki swallowed hard before blurting out, “I want to do this in my Jotun form!”

 

Tony blinked and then nodded. “Oh. Well, sure.” He put his arms around Loki and pulled him close. “I’d love that, babe. You’re super-hot when you’re all blue. But... it didn’t go so well the last time, and I don’t want to take a chance on hurting you.” He pulled back and looked into Loki’s fevered eyes. “You sure you’re ready to try again?

 

“I told you, I heal quickly. It should be fine.” Loki re-wrapped himself around Tony. “It will, in fact, be magnificent.” He nuzzled into Tony’s neck and murmured, “Please, love. I need this so badly.”

 

Tony nodded against him, feeling a rush in his loins at the thought of Loki in his other skin, begging him for sex. It was just so damn _hot._ He started to reach for Loki’s cock, but Loki pulled away, firmly distancing himself from his boyfriend. “Stay back. After I shift, I’ll need to adjust my temperature before you touch me, remember?”

 

Tony watched in awe as soft blue rapidly ran the length of Loki’s body, replacing pale flesh chameleon-like. And, jeeze, he was gorgeous, Tony thought in amazement. He wondered if he’d ever get used to this, if one day seeing Loki shift his skin would be as unremarkable to him as coming to bed in a t-shirt and plaid boxer shorts. He kind of doubted it.

 

Eyes closed, Loki held himself perfectly still for a long moment. When he opened them, he held his arm out to Tony. “One finger. Quick touch,” he ordered.

 

Tony obeyed, and while Loki’s skin was substantially colder than usual, it wasn’t uncomfortably so. “It’s fine.”

 

“All right. I’ll continue to warm for a while, but if you like, we can go ahead and get started.”

 

“I think it’s cute how you act like I have a choice,” Tony quipped. 

 

“Oh, you do, as do I. I’ll be happy to make use of the, what was the term? Oh yes, ‘dildo,’ you have stashed in your nightstand, should you hesitate much longer.” Loki smirked cheerfully as he reached for the drawer, but Tony grabbed his arm and lay him on his back. He got on top and gathered him into his arms and kissed him, noting that the chilled lips almost instantly warmed under his touch. 

 

“You are so damn sexy,” Tony breathed, outlining Loki’s tribal markings with gentle nips and laves of his tongue. 

 

Without the containment of the glamour spell, Loki’s body was utterly free, and every neuron, every touchpoint inside him felt as if it was glowing and throbbing with desire. Loki had never felt such feral power coursing through him, nor such anticipation; he thought of a jungle cat poised as its prey unwittingly approached, how its body would reverberate with tightly harnessed energy, ready to explode upon attack.

 

He felt rather sorry for Tony.

 

But, Tony would not be rushed. He took his time, lingering over Loki’s desperately arched neck, the tip of his tongue teasing his nipples, kissing down the etched lines of his torso as he slid a finger between the delicate lips of Loki’s slit and gently massaged the tender flesh he found there. Loki was now reaching some sort of apex of frustration, clawing at Tony’s back, digging his fingers into the soft flesh of Tony’s bare ass, killingly squeezing around his waist with his thighs like an angry boa constrictor.

 

Tony was beginning to question whether he would survive the encounter, but hell, what a way to go.

 

Fortunately for both of them, Tony managed to wriggle downward so that he was able to bury his face between Loki’s thighs. To his relief, Loki now spread himself wide, allowing Tony to press his mouth against smooth blue skin, first applying wet kisses, then licking, then giving a series of just-this-side-of-painful bites along long limbs. He heard Loki make a choked sound, it might have been a word, it might have been “please,” Tony wasn’t sure, but he didn’t care. He was like a starved man sat before a rich buffet and he wasn’t going to miss a single morsel. It was several long, deliciously tortuous minutes before he poked his tongue into Loki’s slick, sweet quim.

 

Tony settled in, firmly gripping Loki’s thighs as he dipped his tongue into the tangy depths. He probed deeply, finding a luscious well of wetness and lapped his way in, up and out, and he did it again and again and again. Loki writhed and bucked furiously under his ministrations, begging for him to _fill him,_ please, Stark, for the sake of all that is holy, fill him, before he pulverized his puny mortal bones into dust and had to settle for use of the dildo all the rest of his days. 

 

Tony chuckled and pulled himself upward. He took Loki’s jaw in one hand and locked eyes with him, enjoying the look of hunger and need that peered back at him, loving that he would be the one to satisfy it—well, he hoped he’d be, anyway. God knew what would happen if he didn’t. With that in mind, he took his own cock in hand, guided it inside Loki, and plunged in deep and hard. 

 

Loki cried out, relief and gratitude flowing from every pore. He melded into Tony’s warm skin, wrapping him in his arms and legs, and taking each soul-filling thrust with a groan of pleasure. Deep inside him, Tony paused to reach for the lube. He coated his palm and began stroking Loki’s cock in time with his thrusts. Loki made an anguished whimper, desperately working his hips to find the best angle to accept both the powerful penetration and the rhythmic strokes. Once they were moving in harmony, Loki’s glittering ruby eyes again stared into Tony’s and he hissed, “That’s better—but do not dare to stop, you bootless cur. Hope for your sake you have the stamina to take this to its conclusion. I would hate to have to immolate you in your own bed.”

 

Tony being Tony, he did, of course, stop. He gave a dreamy sigh and fluttered his eyelashes. “Gosh, handsome, you say the sweetest things. I think I’m going to start a line of greeting cards, and that’ll be the Valentine message—oof!” Tony gasped as Loki simply rolled both of them over in one smooth motion, pinning Tony under him. He proceeded to fiercely rock his hips, his inner walls clamped tightly around Tony’s cock, and he worked his own member at the same time, arching his spine and throwing back his mane of ebony hair. Thus occupied, he didn’t notice Tony grab the lube again; he sneakily reached around Loki and slid slicked-up fingers between his bouncing rear cheeks and into his crinkled little hole.

 

Loki gave a primal roar and came; Tony pulled himself upwards with one hand holding fast to the back of Loki’s neck, the other on the small of his lover’s back, and kept brutally bucking up into him. He shot hard inside Loki, groaning through his climax until he collapsed into the softness of the bed. Loki seemed to melt off of him, the blue of his skin gradually fading until he looked like “normal” Loki again, scrunched up against Tony’s utterly spent body. He too felt as if his bones had been turned to jelly; he nuzzled in under Tony’s armpit and heaved an enormous sigh of satisfaction.

 

“That... was extraordinary,” he breathed happily. 

 

“Yeah... That might be... too many syllables for me right now, but yeah. That’s what it was,” Tony agreed in a weak series of gasps.

 

The warm glow of Loki’s release raced into every crevice of his core, and he suddenly realized what he’d been missing the last time he and Tony made love.  The pregnancy hormones must have ignited a need deep inside him, way past the thin cover of his Aesir illusion, and it took being in his Jotun form to reach it. He turned a rueful look up to Tony. “I hope you truly did enjoy that, Stark. Because I have a feeling that I’ll be requiring equally spectacular efforts from you from now until I deliver this fetus. This is the first time I’ve felt satisfied since you got me pregnant.”

 

Tony pulled Loki closer. “I’ll do my best, babe. I love you.”

 

As Loki snuggled in and stilled in what felt to Tony like absolute relaxation, the engineer resolved to look into modifying that dildo. If his horny little pregnant boyfriend was going to need a performance like that from him on a regular basis, there was going to have to be a motor involved.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	29. Chapter 29

There weren’t many things Thor envied about Loki, but his brother’s silver tongue had gotten them both out of trouble more than once, and Thor was often left agape in admiration at Loki’s cleverness. As he helped his mother onto the back of Odin’s steed, Sleipnir, he wished—deeply and sincerely—that he could possess Loki’s powers of persuasion for just a few brief moments. 

It had all happened so suddenly. Once Frigga’d announced that they were going to Jotunheim, a flurry of activity erupted—servants ordered to ready two traveling bags, along with the warmest cloaks the Allmother and her son owned. Some sort of message was sent to someone, somewhere in Jotunheim. Frigga disappeared into Odin’s chambers and Thor stood with his ear pressed against the door, but he could only hear muffled voices rising and falling for a short time before Frigga swept out and past him, on to accomplish another task in preparation for their journey.

It was all quite bewildering, and there wasn’t a moment when Frigga was the slightest bit interested in listening to Thor’s protests.

Now, with Frigga astride, Thor hoisted himself up to sit behind her in the saddle. His thick arms enveloped her as he reached to handle the reins, guiding the magnificent animal toward the Bifrost. Once they were moving at a steady gait, Thor tried once again. 

“Mother, do you mean to tell me that Father approves of this foolish errand?”

“Of course, dear. He engineered it, apparently.”

Thor frowned in concentration. “But, why would he do that? Why would he send his beloved wife and the future king of Asgard on their own to a fierce and hostile land?”

“Things have changed on Jotunheim since Laufey’s death. There is a new ruler on the throne, and the realm hopes to reclaim its long-ago place in the universe through diplomacy and honest trade practices.”

“Trade?” Thor sniffed disdainfully. “They are a warrior people, they grow no crops, they produce no goods—what do they have to trade?”

Frigga laughed slightly. “There are a number of mines which produce valuable metals throughout Jotunheim. But, during the course of an ancient civil war, the entrances to the mines were destroyed and the realm became isolated. Their ruler, Laufey’s ancestor, refused to trade with outsiders and instead created the warrior class. They began attacking other worlds to get what they needed, and thus the notion of the monstrous Frost Giant was born.”

Thor absorbed that information, listening to the rhythmic pounding of eight great hooves on the fertile ground of Odin’s kingdom. Then, he hissed into his mother’s ear, “Why do I know nothing of all that? If I am someday to rule Asgard, why have I not been taught these things?”

Frigga shrugged. “You never asked.” She looked back and smiled as they neared Heimdall and the rainbow bridge.

*****

Loki was fairly luxuriating in Tony’s arms. He was utterly content, long legs entwined with Tony’s shorter, stockier ones, his belly pressed against Tony’s. He was so very nearly asleep that he jerked, startled, when Tony quietly asked, “Is that the baby?”

Loki raised an eyebrow, otherwise holding himself perfectly still. By the Nine, he thought—yes. There it was, the little fluttering, only now it was more pronounced, like a swipe of a tiny hand. Or foot. Or... something. He put his hand over the spot where his skin met Tony’s and was amazed to discover that it was detectable from the outside as well. “It is. And, it’s so much stronger than before.”

Tony whooped loudly. He pulled Loki’s hand away and replaced it with his own. “Wow! Just, wow! I can feel it! Damn, Loki, that’s my kid moving around in there! Do you think he can hear my voice?”

“I think anyone within a square mile of here can hear your voice, but as far as the fetus is concerned, I don’t know. Maybe?”

“Hey, Junior,” Tony wriggled downward to mouth onto Loki’s stomach. “It’s Daddy. Listen, I know things are kind of cramped in there, but trust me, you’ve got it made. Perfect temperature, grub on tap 24/7, and no school! But, it’s okay, once you make it to the outside, you’re gonna love it. I’m rich, and your other dad’s a god! Pretty sweet deal, huh? All right, well, I know you’re busy, what with building a nervous system and the cell division and all, so I’ll let you get back to it, but I just wanted to say I love you—I can’t wait to see you, kiddo. That’s it for now, but we’ll talk again. Over and out.” Tony grinned up at Loki, who was regarding him with a mixture of fondness and bewildered amusement.

“You are ridiculous.”

“Yeah. Trust me, I’ll get worse.”

“Ugh, the mind boggles.”

“Listen, you wait until we’ve got two of ‘em. Or, three. Four? How many kids do you want, Loki?”

Loki’s eyes had turned to slits and he’d already started sneering at the mention of a second child, but his expression slowly softened and he shrugged as he considered the question. “I don’t know. Before, I didn’t want any at all, but now...” He absently ran his fingers through Tony’s hair and smiled a little. “I have a suggestion. Let’s have this one and see how it goes. Perhaps I’ll be ready for another in a few hundred years.”

Tony sighed. “Yeah, well, I hate to say this, because I totally plan to cheat the system, but I’m probably not going to be around by then.”

“Mm,” Loki said with a thoughtful nod. “Good point. Well, I shall simply have to preserve copious amounts of your seed before you depart this mortal realm. Then I can have all the babies I want, whenever I want them. Dozens, hundreds, perhaps. A whole army, and they’ll all look like you.” Loki’s eyes were glinting mischievously.

Tony had a vexed look on his face. “Okay, A. You don’t need an army, and B. I don’t want a bunch of little Tonys and Tonyettes running around without me to teach ‘em how to be awesome. So, no sperm bank deposits for you, pal, sorry. But, I wouldn’t mind having a few more while I’m still around to enjoy them.”

Loki leaned down and kissed Tony. “‘Enjoy’ may not be the word we end up using even with just the one, but that’s a discussion for another day. Right now, I—”

“Tony,” JARVIS intoned. “Captain Rogers is here to see you.”

******

Thor wrapped one arm securely around Frigga, raised Mjolnir toward the heavens, and sent them hurtling through space. They landed on Jotunheim’s icy tundra, bound on one side by a vast ocean, just as they’d been instructed to do in a message Frigga had received shortly before leaving the palace. Wind whipped around them, coming off the water in torrents of vicious needles.

Thor was instantly on high alert, sweeping his gaze across the bare and far-reaching horizon for threats, but there was nothing, not a living creature, not a tree, just rocky formations glinting with blue tinged light. Thor’s face was etched with a scowl; he didn’t like this, not in the least. But Frigga was calm and collected as usual, pulling a heavy fur wrap out of her traveling bag and slipping it securely around her shoulders. 

“Thor—you’d best put on your furs as well. We Aesir can handle a great deal of cold, but it will eventually wear on us, besides being unnecessarily uncomfortable.”

“I’d prefer to stay unencumbered in case of battle, thank you,” Thor said sharply.

“There won’t be a battle. Norns, son, do you think I’d bring us here if I thought there would be?”

“I—” Thor’s retort was squelched by the thundering of what sounded like horses’ hooves in the distance. They both turned to look toward the noise, and soon a large coach drawn by two huge, shaggy gray creatures appeared. 

A shiver went through Thor as the rig approached. There were two Frost Giants sitting on the exposed perch, one holding the reins, the other a staff. In appearance, they were just as Thor expected, having seen plenty of Jotun warriors. Thor instantly tensed, but Frigga warningly squeezed his arm, indicating he was to stay still. 

The carriage came to a stop a few yards in front of them; the two men jumped down and came to stand at attention several feet apart from one another. Every muscle in Thor’s body screamed to jolt into action, but Frigga’s unruffled demeanor anchored him. And, it was odd—neither Frost Giant seemed to take any notice of them, staring past them toward the sea. 

Just as Thor was about to protest that this entire situation was not only absurd, but insane, the door of the carriage swung open. Thor’s eyes narrowed and he gripped Mjolnir tighter, expecting a whole legion of Giants to come tumbling out, but instead there was only one—and an exceedingly old one, at that. 

The man looked nothing like a typical Frost Giant, apart from his blue skin. He was wizened, his back hunched so that he was only a few inches taller than Thor. His head was crowned with flowing white hair, and he wore a fur-trimmed white robe secured with a gold sash; his face had the long, narrow bone structure that Thor was well familiar with, but the flesh fell loosely in wrinkles, and his red eyes were so deep-set that they appeared black. They were topped by thatches of wildly overgrown white eyebrows that lent the strange fellow a rather comical aspect. He, too, carried a staff, but as he shuffled towards them, Thor suspected it was used primarily to aid him in walking. 

The old man wended his way between the warriors and came to a tottering halt in front of Frigga. “Allmother,” he said in a surprisingly hearty voice. “My apologies, I’d hoped to be here to greet you when you arrived. It’s so good to meet you after all this time.” He bowed as well as he could, and as he straightened, Frigga held out her hand. The man gripped it and pressed it to his dark blue lips, and then turned to Thor.

“And, Thor! Prince of Asgard. Please know, you are equally welcome here. I am Alfarin, the Queen’s mage.” His eyes crinkled cheerily. “Also her grandfather, by the way.”

“Queen?” Thor said, stunned. “Jotunheim is now ruled by a woman?” He glanced at his mother, who studiously ignored him. 

“Oh, indeed!” Alfarin nodded. “Our queen is Farbauti, widow of Laufey. Her sons, Helblindi and Byleistr, were neither old enough nor sage enough at the time of their father’s death to take the throne. Which is just as well. My granddaughter is doing a marvelous job.” The old man beamed, and Frigga smiled.

“She certainly is. And, I can’t wait to meet her at last. But, do you think we could continue our greetings in the coach? I’m not going to pretend that it isn’t a bit... chilly out here by the water.”

“Oh, of course, of course. Come, let me help you up.” 

It was quite a stretch to enter the carriage, but Frigga was clearly capable of doing so on her own. Still, she allowed Alfarin to guide her carefully inside. He turned to offer a hand to Thor, but he rather rudely ignored it and clambered up unaided. Thor sat on one side of the coach, and Frigga and Alfarin on the other; Alfarin brought out two heavy lap blankets and he lay one over Frigga and tucked it around her feet. He started to do the same for Thor, but Thor irritably snatched it away and dismissively laid it on the bench beside him.

Frigga shot him a warning look. “Thor, our host is offering you his hospitality. Please accept it in kind.”

Alfarin laughed. “It’s quite all right, your Highness. Relations between Asgard and Jotunheim have been brutally fractured for centuries. I’m not offended that the lad doesn’t welcome my feeble overtures.”

“He can be civil, however,” Frigga said firmly. “He’s been taught some degree of humility, I believe.”

Thor took in a deep breath, and forced himself to say, “Apologies, sir,” and Frigga smiled approvingly.

The carriage rocked as the two warrior Frost Giants reclaimed their seats on the outside, and soon the team was turned and they were back on the road to the city.

As they left the oceanside, huge ancient-looking trees loomed ahead of them, and they eventually entered a dark forest. Thor was busy watching the landscape roll by, only partially listening to his mother chat with their host. Much was weighing heavily on his mind, and he had a flood of questions demanding to be asked, but he had no idea if Alfarin could be trusted to answer honestly, or if he, Thor, would be weakening his and his mother’s position by revealing the depths of his ignorance. So, he held his tongue and hoped he’d have a chance to quiz Frigga at some point in the near future.

In time, they came through the forest and Alfarin reached out a hand and banged on the roof of the carriage. The rig slowed and came to a stop at the top of a hill. Thor instantly tensed. “What is happening?”

“I thought you might enjoy a full view of the Imperial City,” the old man said. Thor and Frigga followed his gaze and saw before them a grand, sparkling city of ice, topped by what was obviously the royal palace. “From here, it looks as it did eons ago, before war and deprivation robbed it of its grandeur.” Alfarin spoke softly, his mind plainly overrun with a rush of bittersweet memories.

Thor cast a glance at his face. Illuminated by the light coming up from the city, he looked more vigorous; his dark red eyes glimmered, and for a moment Thor thought he saw a hint of the young man he must once have been. “It is... quite beautiful,” Thor said, almost without thinking. It seemed wrong not to acknowledge the old man’s pride and sorrow. Frigga nodded in a agreement. 

“Knowing the initiatives Queen Farbauti has already put in place, I’m sure it will be fully restored in no time,” Frigga said gently.

Alfarin smiled slightly and tapped at the carriage again. The beasts began pulling their burden and they traveled down the hill at a brisk pace, slowing only when they reached the entrance to the city. A gigantic metal gate automatically swung open and they rolled forward, passing through a towering defense wall made of ice and what appeared to be wrought iron spikes glistening with frost. 

Thor took in the sights; much to his surprise, the streets were filled with people, Frost Giants too, he supposed, but unlike the warriors he was familiar with, they wore various kinds of clothing, had all sorts of hair styles in shades that ran from jet black to reddish-brown to blond, and were of all sizes, although Thor grasped that the smaller ones were children. Large animals that looked more like wolves than dogs accompanied many; some rode hulking beasts such as the ones pulling their carriage, and some were milling around in front of what Thor gathered were shops made of ice.

It was all very odd-looking, yes, but there was no hint of violence or hostility among the throngs. People paused in their doings to look at the carriage and a few raised a hand in greeting; no one seemed particularly put out by the vehicle overtaking the right of way and causing pedestrians to scoot to the side. Thor was momentarily overwhelmed by an assault on his senses as the smell of food cooking wafted to his nostrils, and the low roar of people going about their day-to-day business filled his ears. Everything had a sheen to it, golden light glowing behind walls of thin ice, like glass. 

It took him a moment to see the signs of dilapidation; holes in the road, broken edges of buildings, toppled spires left to sit uselessly in alleyways. But there was energy too, small crews of workmen conjuring blocks of ice and working to repair fallen walls, and bridges between towering edifices. 

The carriage took a turn and suddenly the palace came into full view. It was alive with light, a beacon at the top of a hill, but as they approached they noticed ruined towers jutting raggedly into the sky and broken-down balconies marring the gracious entryway. The closer they came, the more Thor could see that the palace had sustained all sorts of damage, and stood in a far sadder condition than the city. As if reading his thoughts, Alfarin commented proudly, “The Queen has chosen to spend our limited funds on rebuilding the town rather than the royal palace. She also makes sure the children are fed and taught, when there are those that would prefer to invest in selfish enterprises. It is efforts such as these which have won her the hearts of the Jotun people.”

For a moment, Thor was thoroughly impressed. It occurred to him that this was the sort of thing Loki had been talking about when he’d questioned Thor’s worthiness to rule. Strategic thinking about battles, he excelled at; strategic thinking about winning the loyalty of an entire people, not so much. He was again reminded that he had a lot to learn before ascending the throne, but his troubled thoughts fizzled away when, upon entering the palace grounds, he saw what could only be an entire unit of the Jotun army training in a side yard, and he went back into defensive mode.

The Frost Giants were practicing some sort of complicated maneuver involving casting streams of ice across a mark, but when the carriage approached, their leader yelled something in the Jotun tongue, and the men all stopped and stood in what Thor guessed was supposed to be a pose of respect for the visitors. But, most of the warriors had blank looks on their faces, much as the ones who had greeted them at the oceanside had. 

Others looked positively murderous. 

Thor noticed Frigga staring out the window as well. “I take it not everyone has fully embraced Queen Farbauti’s agenda,” she said calmly.

Alfarin dropped his gaze. “Sadly, no. Most of those men were hand-picked by Laufey. They do not approve of welcoming Aesir onto Jotun land.”

“Then, the queen should get rid of them!” Thor couldn’t help blurting out. “They will cause her nothing but trouble!”

Alfarin smiled sadly. “There is truth to that, certainly. But, Jotunheim has, ahem, ‘lost’ the Casket which provided power to protect us. Without it, we have little in the way of defense other than our warriors. Without them, we would soon be swallowed up and subjugated by another realm.”

“And, Asgard doesn’t need the combined forces of two of the Nine to deal with,” Frigga added briskly, directing her remarks to Thor more than Alfarin. “So, we endorse the continued support of your forces. Within reason, of course.” 

Thor leaned back as the coach made its way to a large courtyard directly in front of the palace entrance. He was glad to leave the warriors behind, but he would keep the image of those battle-ready faces close to his heart forever.

*******

The carriage stopped inside a long dank, lantern-lit tunnel. The driver and his partner leapt down and stood by while Alfarin again offered a hand to Frigga as she gracefully alit from the cab. Thor, he left to fend for himself, and it was just good luck that the majestic golden prince didn’t wind up falling on his royal butt as his feet slid around on the ice. He caught himself just in time and a sneer of disgust crossed his face as he gripped the edge of the carriage and hurried to catch up with his mother and their host. He glanced back to see the two Giants dutifully carrying their luggage with barely suppressed smirks on their faces. 

Alfarin led them into the upper halls of the palace. The temperature was only slightly warmer there, but without the wind whipping around them, it was considerably more pleasant than in the carriage, although the gloom of an overcast sky still hung over them. They walked the long icy way and gradually their surroundings became more and more amenable—floors of marble rather than ice, walls hung with huge framed Jotun landscapes and portraits, windows covered with threadbare brocade curtains. 

At last, Alfarin took the bags from the footmen, opened a door and gestured for Thor and Frigga to enter. To both their surprise, it was a bright, warm room which could easily have been found in any country home on Asgard. The floor was of wood, covered with a faded wool rug. There was, shockingly, a fireplace, with a fire blazing. The worn furniture was Jotun-sized and rather austere, made from metal and various animal hides, but there were two much smaller overstuffed chairs in front of the hearth that appeared to be the very epitome of Asgardian comfort. Alfarin patted one and said, “Please, sit. These were made with visitors in mind, as was the entire room. It is good that it is seeing use again, it’s been eons. I hope it is comfortable for you. If the temperature is still too chilly, I can add another log or two to the fire.”

“No, it’s perfect,” Frigga said as she slipped the cloak from her shoulders. “Most hospitable. Thank you.”

“Oh! The queen has instructed me to offer you some, let’s see...” The old wizard pulled a scrap of bark from his robe and frowned at it, holding it an arm’s length away. “Oh, yes, tea? Or... cof-fee?” The word didn’t seem to come easily to him. 

“Well... coffee would be most welcome,” Frigga said. “Am I to take it that this is not a popular beverage on Jotunheim?”

Alfarin chuckled bashfully. “Oh, no, it is. Among the young folk, at least. I’m still catching up on all the latest trends.”

“Catching up?” Thor asked.

Alfarin nodded. “You miss a lot when you’re in prison,” he said in a spritely tone. “Now, I’ll go see to your refreshments, and I’ll let the Queen know you’ve safely arrived.” He stepped out into the hall and closed the door behind him.

Thor and Frigga looked at each other.

“Prison?” Thor said. “What do you suppose he... did?”

Frigga shrugged. “Evidently, it didn’t take much to get thrown into a cell under Laufey’s reign.”

“Hm.” 

Thor settled into one of the comfy chairs and stared into the fire. Frigga joined him and gave him a knowing look. “You have questions.”

“Well, yes. First of all—” Thor leaned toward her and lowered his voice. “So, Farbauti is Laufey’s widow, correct?”

“Yes.”

“So... is she then... Loki’s birth mother?” he asked, eyes wide.

Frigga sighed. “Yes.”

Thor’s expression turned thunderous. “So, she allowed her babe to be abandoned to die? How could she? What kind of woman would do that? You’ve heard what a good, kind a ruler she is—yet, how can you trust her, knowing she did such a thing?”

“Shh!” Frigga hissed. “We don’t know her side of the story. She may have had no say. Or, perhaps it is considered a kindness to prevent the misery of growing up deformed in a brutal society. We can’t know, and I don’t want you bringing it up. This will be a delicate situation, Thor. Please be cautious with your words.”

Thor scowled, but nodded. Then, he asked, “There’s something else. I was under the impression that the Jotun... carried the characteristics of both sexes. However, I was taught to refer to them all as ‘he.’ How is it that they now have a queen?”

“From what I have been able to glean out of my ancestor’s writings, many Jotun embrace the aspects of both genders throughout their lives. Others find themselves identifying with one or the other and thus choose to present themselves as either predominantly male or predominantly female. And, of course, there are variations along the entire spectrum, which apparently are accepted as a matter of course. In many ways, the Jotun are ahead of us in social matters.”

“That’s all very interesting,” Thor said begrudgingly. “But, on a more practical note, why are we here? How is it you think any of these people can help us with the after-effects of mind control when they’re barely able to repair their city? How—”

Just then, the door opened, and Alfarin solemnly entered, holding himself as straight as his hunched back allowed. “Allmother, Prince Thor—I present to you Farbauti, Queen of Jotunheim.” He bowed low, and in swept the most striking—and unusual-looking—woman Thor had ever seen.


	30. Farbauti, Queen of Jotunheim

Tony paused in what was about to be an upward swoop to capture Loki’s mouth, but JARVIS’ words, “Captain Rogers is here to see you,” caused prickles of adrenaline to swarm through him instead; the expression on Loki’s face told him that he was having a similar reaction. They stared at each other for a moment.

“Get rid of him,” Loki commanded, shooting a dismissive glance up toward where JARVIS’ voice had emanated from.

“No! Cancel, J, cancel!” Tony gave Loki a disapproving frown. “We can’t do that.”

“Why not? Our morning was ruined, must the rest of the day be so as well? Tell your Captain to run along and come back when you’re not so... busy.” Loki ran a fingertip along Tony’s cheek, and then down his chest in a totally distracting way.

“Uh... Huh? Oh, no, I mean—look, this was going to happen sooner or later, we might as well get it out of the way.”

“Get what out of the way?”

Tony pursed his lips, considering the best choice of words. “Having him see you again. Here.”

Loki’s rakishly raised eyebrow and evil grin made Tony realize he could have phrased that better. Loki purred, “Oh, you’re inviting him to our bedroom? I _thought_ there was a bit of subtext between the two of you. Well, I’m not the best at sharing, but perhaps, just this once—”

“No! I just meant—Oh. You’re teasing, right?”

Loki chuckled none too sincerely. “Of course.”

“Great. Okay, I’m going to go make nice with our guest. You get dressed, but stay here until I call you. I have to find out how much, if anything, he knows about the... situation.”

“The situation will not be to his liking, I’m afraid.”

“No, it won’t. But, it is what it is, and he’ll have to figure out a way to accept it sooner or later. Might as well start now.”

Loki resignedly watched as Tony got up and pulled on his clothes. “Fine. But, do try to hurry this up. Tell him we have baby things to shop for, as well as useless fretting to do about Selvig and Barton’s unfortunate conditions. One or the other ought to persuade him to be on his way.”

Tony shot him a long-suffering look as he opened the bedroom door. “Yeah, good thinking. God, I love you. Why, I don’t know, but I do.”

A lazy grin came over Loki, and he settled back under the covers, not quite ready to leave the warmth of his and Tony’s bed just yet.

******

Thor and Frigga rose at Alfarin’s announcement of the Queen’s arrival. Thor stared in amazement at the vision coming through the door.

A sleek jaguar on the hunt came to mind. Queen Farbauti moved sinuously, shiny black hair cascading down over her shoulders, a headpiece of small golden horns protruding from among the thick tresses. A gown of buttery-soft animal skin gripped her voluptuous figure, bound at the neck and waist by a band of glinting gold, and a sheathed knife hung over her shapely hips. Lower, the gown split to reveal long, slender legs that Thor couldn’t help but envision wrapped around him for a round of the most exotic coupling he’d ever experienced—a thought that was quickly dismissed by an elbow jab to his ribs, courtesy of Frigga.

He forced himself to raise his eyes to the Queen’s face, and was soon lost in fascination. Farbauti’s bone structure could have been sculpted by the gods themselves—high cheekbones, long Roman nose, a narrow jaw that could have looked severe but which was offset by huge, long-lashed ruby eyes rimmed by black kohl. Her skin was a rich shade of blue, her full lips painted deep violet, and the tribal markings on her forehead and chin were subtle, small and vertical. She had others on her cheeks that were harsher, a darker color than the others, but they just added a rough edge to her beauty. 

The very air in the room seemed to vibrate as she entered, such was the strength of her presence. Her stature was, as expected, considerably greater than anyone’s on Asgard. She stood easily a head taller than Thor, but she carried herself with such fluid grace that he soon forgot how unusual it was for him to have to look upwards to meet someone’s eyes. 

And, those eyes... Farbauti appeared quite youthful until Thor peered into her eyes. He wasn’t the most perceptive, but even he could see the ages of sorrow and pain they harbored. But all that seemed to melt away as they crinkled in welcome and she purred in a low, melodic voice, “My most treasured guests, at last you are here. I’d begun to fear the ocean had claimed you.” 

Farbauti turned to Frigga. “Your Majesty—I cannot tell you what an honor it is to look upon your face and hear your voice at last.” She dipped her head deferentially and held out her long-fingered, black-nailed hands, palms up. Frigga placed her hands, palms down, upon them and they were enveloped by Farbauti’s firm grip. Then, Farbauti moved to stand in front of Thor, and her eyes seemed to bore into his.

“Your Royal Highness. Forgive my staring, but I’ve heard so many tales about you. I’ve pictured you in my mind so many times, and I must say, the image has fallen far short of reality. You’re hardly the fearsome monster I expected, but are instead fair of face, and a powerful warrior. Having you here under peaceful circumstances brings me great joy—it is an honor.” She again offered her open hands and Thor gingerly placed his as his mother had, upon her upturned palms. She closed her larger hands around his and squeezed; he could feel controlled strength in her sinewy fingers and he resisted the temptation to squeeze back with a show of force. Instead, he just lightly closed his hands around hers and gave a small smile.

She returned it with a flash of white teeth. “How strange all this must be to you, young prince!” she said with a laugh, still holding his hands. “It is to me, too. If, years ago, someone had told me Aesir would be standing before me in these halls pressing hands, I would have slit their throats for their impudence. Yet, here you are!” She dropped Thor’s hands, shaking her head in wonderment. “How times have changed.”

“Indeed.” Frigga spoke softly, and then reached into her travel bag. “Please accept these small tokens of our esteem.” She brought out a flask of mead, a box of little cakes, and several jars of fruit preserves, earning oohs and ahs from their hostess. Once the gifts had been laid out, Frigga continued. “I’ve been looking forward to meeting you, too. I know it must be difficult...” Frigga dropped her eyes respectfully. “...knowing all that has befallen your land and your people.” Frigga took a deep breath and added, “My sympathy on the loss of your husband.”

The room was deathly quiet for a long moment, and Thor noticed Alfarin standing near the queen, apparently on high alert. But then, to both Frigga and Thor’s surprise, Farbauti broke out in peals of infectious laughter. “Oh, your sympathy is much appreciated—but utterly unnecessary.” She gazed at Thor with luminous red eyes. “The fact is, I’ve often wished for the opportunity to do this—” and, with that, she leaned forward and down and pressed a soft kiss onto Thor’s lips. He blinked rapidly, frozen for fear of making some unforgivable faux pas.

Farbuati straightened and laughed again. “That is a thank-you for the tremendous favor you did for me and my kingdom. Taking Laufey’s worthless life was the greatest act of kindness you can imagine. I am forever in your debt.” She dipped into a small curtsey and then smiled enigmatically at Thor and then Frigga. “Now, please, sit down. The refreshments should be here any moment.” She sat in one of the larger chairs positioned in front of the two Aesir-sized easy chairs, and Thor and Frigga took their seats as well, puzzled expressions on their faces.

Alfarin made his way to the door and stepped out into the hall. He said something in the Jotun tongue and ushered in a servant carrying a large tray with cups and a plate of small dry-looking pastries upon it. Once it was in place on a table, the servant was dismissed and Alfarin poured steaming cups of coffee for Thor and Frigga, and something thick and murky for Farbauti. She took it and settled back, beaming at her visitors. “Well, we have much to discuss—where shall we start?”

It was one of the very few times in Thor’s life that he saw his mother appear at a loss. He could almost discern her brain rapidly flipping through various responses and summarily rejecting each one in its turn. Finally, she leaned forward a bit and said, “Queen Farbauti—I don’t wish to dwell on a difficult subject, but I do feel it is important to correct a misunderstanding straightaway. Thor is not responsible for Laufey’s death—it was my other son, Loki, who did the deed. He was in a rather fragile state of mind at the time, and—”

Farbauti cocked her head in mild surprise. “Loki? Oh, yes, you do have a second son, I’d forgotten. So, it is he to whom I owe my good fortune? Well, I hope I will be able to personally thank him one day. In the meantime, please let him know I am most grateful.” Farbauti blew a blast of cooling air across the top of her drink and sipped it noisily.

Thor and Frigga exchanged glances. Frigga cleared her throat. “Your Majesty—again, I hate to bring up unpleasant issues, but I do want us to converse in complete honesty. Am I to believe that you truly harbor no ill will toward Loki?”

Farbauti raised her eyebrows. “For what? For killing a vicious brute? A criminal? Please. You see these?” She indicated the tribal marks on her forehead and chin. “I was born with these. These?” Now, she pointed to the more pronounced markings on her cheeks, and her voice became a snarl. “He gave me these. To make me look like one of his filthy tribe. He held me down and carved my face without so much as a draught of mead to dull the pain. And, that wasn’t even done in anger! He—” Farbauti seemed overcome and she stopped speaking. Alfarin came to stand behind her and he put a hand on her shoulder. She reached up and gripped it tightly. “He could be cruel beyond reason,” she added softly, her eyes hooded.

“I’m so sorry,” Frigga said. “Forgive me. I’ve always wondered... about the circumstances of Loki’s birth. I think I understand now.”

Farbauti was staring blankly at the floor, but at Frigga’s words, she raised her eyes and fixed Frigga with a piercing stare. “What do you mean?”

“Well—it’s just that, when Loki was brought to me as an infant, it seemed so... Such a terrible thing, leaving a babe abandoned to die. I could hardly—”

Frowning, Farbauti set down her cup and leaned forward. “When he was brought to you? What are you saying? Explain!”

“My father brought Loki home after battling Laufey on his own soil,” Thor said impulsively. “He is your son. Loki is your son.”

“Thor,” Frigga hissed warningly. 

But, it was too late. Farbauti’s eyes had taken on a feral glint, her lips were pulled back in a nasty sneer, and one hand was on her blade. “You lie, son of Odin! I have two sons, they’re here with me, and I have no other!”

“I’m sorry,” Frigga said soothingly. “Thor spoke out of turn. Perhaps we should—”

“It is no lie! Loki was found on Jotunheim and brought to Asgard, to be raised as my brother! Odin told me so himself!” Thor’s nostrils were flaring and he gripped Mjolnir tightly.

Farbauti seemed to dismiss Thor as one would an annoying gnat and turned instead to Frigga. “How disappointing. I invite you here in good faith, yet you bring this fantastic tale to torment me. No wonder we have long been taught never to trust the Aesir.”

Frigga sighed and then pulled herself up into her most regal pose. “I came here in good faith, as well. I want only to see our two realms set on the path to peace. This is no lie, no tale to cause you grief. It is truth, and I am so sorry to have it come forth in this way—but it never occurred to me that you did not know the fate of your own child.”

Farbauti seemed on the verge of a violent outburst, but Alfarin leaned down and spoke in a kindly tone. “My queen, please. I have heard this story once before. I was imprisoned in Laufey’s dungeon. Of course, no one would tell me anything directly, but one night I heard the guards talking and laughing. They spoke of the king’s first-born. One of them said he was to be raised by the Aesir, and how fitting that was... for such a weak and pitiful runt.” He squeezed Farbauti’s shoulder and then continued. “I didn’t believe it, of course. I thought it was foolishness, that they were speaking in jest. But, it seems they were not. I’m so sorry, my love.”

Farbauti jerked sideways to face Alfarin. “Why did you never tell me this?” she hissed in a low but dangerous voice that seemed to startle the old man. But he answered firmly, “You know I was allowed no contact with you until after Laufey’s death! By then, it was only a vague memory. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, but what good would it have done to tell you such a terrible thing?”

The queen’s eyes narrowed and her mouth took on an ugly twist. She abruptly stood up and took a step forward, setting everyone on the defensive. But she stopped, threw back her head and shrieked in fury. Thor raised Mjolnir slightly, but Alfarin hastily put himself between Farbauti and the guests. 

Then, to everyone’s surprise, the animal-like roar quickly spiraled down into a low moan of despair, and then wrenching wails. Her hands were clenched so tightly that they shook, and every muscle seemed tensed to an extreme degree. As her agonized sobs reverberated through the room, Alfarin carefully approached her, speaking softly, and then guided her back to her chair.

“Betrayer...” she gasped. “Liar...” Farbauti cast a wild look to the ceiling. _“Murderer.”_ All at once, she slumped back, apparently utterly spent, and the room was again silent for several moments. Slowly, she straightened, and then dropped her head into her hands. 

“Oh, my dear. You truly didn’t know,” Frigga said gently.

Farbauti moved her head slowly from side to side. “No,” she whispered. “No.” By now, she was breathing heavily and tears were streaming down her scarred cheeks. No one quite knew what to do. Frigga gave Alfarin a beseeching look, but he could only shake his head uncertainly. 

Then, Farbauti began to speak. “Long ago, Jotunheim was a divided kingdom. Laufey’s ancestor ruled the upper region, and mine the lower. There was always conflict, but we mostly kept to ourselves. Then, Laufey himself rose to the throne. He brought war. He killed my father. He imprisoned my grandfather.” She absently patted the old man on the arm. 

“And, he stole me for his bride. I was... young. Too young to bear children easily. But he... he wouldn’t wait. I quickly became pregnant, but I was not well. The baby came early and I... I lost a lot of blood. I became unconscious before he was delivered, and didn’t awaken for days. I almost died... When I came to, they told me...” A spasm of sobbing stopped her and they could see her fight to regain control. 

“They told me he was born dead! I never got to see him... Never got to hold him. They told me his little body had been deformed, and that it was a kindness that he didn’t live. I begged to see him, just once, to look upon his precious face, but they... they said he’d been left for the wolves as an offering, so that future heirs would not suffer such a fate. I believed them—why wouldn’t I? What sort of devil would put his own babe to death? I had no friends, no allies to tell me the truth. But I always felt... a part of me was missing. I couldn’t understand it, but now I see. I’ve always known, somehow... that he was still in this world, though lost to me...” She raised streaming eyes to Frigga. “You... You raised him?”

Frigga nodded. “Yes.”

“Why? Why would you take in a Jotun child?”

“When Odin found him in the temple, he made him to appear Aesir. When he brought him home, we agreed—we would raise him as our own. We decided never to tell him...” Frigga was herself crying by now. “...never to tell him of his heritage. That was wrong. It was a terrible mistake. But, we loved him, we always loved him, you must know that.” Overcome, Frigga dabbed at her eyes with a kerchief as Thor uselessly patted her shoulder.

For long moments, there was no sound in the room except for soft sniffling. But then, Farbauti moved to kneel before Frigga. Thor was ready to intervene in an instant, but Farbauti simply picked up one of Frigga’s hands and clasped it between her own. “Thank you,” she said, her voice ragged.

Frigga smiled around her tears and nodded.

“Is he well? Is he... happy?” the Jotun queen asked.

Frigga cleared her throat and gave Thor a glance. “He... suffered a great sickness of the mind, due in no small part to our deception. He did some terrible things, and he was punished. But, he is well again and has found a place in the world, and a love.” She reached out and gently smoothed a strand of hair away from Farbauti’s face. “And... he is with child,” Frigga added, a note of joy coming through her voice. 

A smile eased across Farbauti’s face and she sat back on her heels. “Oh—my son. My babe. I have seen his face so many times in my dreams.” She gracefully rose to her feet and paced across the room to stare out a window. Everyone relaxed a bit and once Farbauti was again in control of her emotions, she returned to her seat. 

“This day is not turning out one bit the way I expected!” she said with a small laugh. “But, it is a great day. My son lives and is well and happy. I could ask for no more than that. But, I do have a wish—I wish to see him, somehow. Where is he? Could he come here, or I there?”

“He... resides on Midgard,” Frigga said slowly. “And, it would not be good for him to travel in his condition, I don’t think. But, more than that, I have to say—I am afraid hearing the news that his Jotun mother wants to meet him might not be well-received. I fear that he could be adversely affected if we... What is the Midgardian phrase, Thor?”

“Sprung this on him,” Thor said dryly.

“Yes, sprung this on him so abruptly.”

“Hmm. I can see your point.” Farbauti frowned thoughtfully. “Still, perhaps something can be worked out.”

“Perhaps. But, Your Majesty, are you well enough to hear the main reason for our visit? I don’t wish to rush you, but as you say, there is much to discuss.”

“Oh, I’m fine now. Please, tell me what you came here for.”

“Thor can explain it better than I.”

With that, Thor launched into the story of how Agent Barton and Dr. Selvig came to be in their unfortunate situation. Both Farbauti and Alfarin listened intently, and when Thor was finished, they looked at each other.

“Mind control... That is nearly a lost art here on Jotunheim,” Alfarin mused.

Farbauti grinned. “One you have practiced in your day.”

“Indeed. And, I have seen this effect before as well.”

“You have?” Thor asked interestedly.

“Oh, yes. The bond exists long after the control is no longer active. You say that the sufferers had a strong reaction in your presence?”

“Yes.”

“Do you recall what Loki said or did just before they were seized?”

Thor shrugged, but thought hard to replay the scene in his mind. “We were all accusing Loki of lying about controlling our friends’ minds and he was very upset. But... Oh, I remember—his mate, Tony, spoke up in his defense. He made it clear that he would stand up for Loki, even against all of us.”

“And, how did Loki respond to that?” Alfarin asked.

A small smile came over Thor. “I have never seen my brother so happy. It was at that moment that I realized he truly does have much of his old spirit back. It was good to see.”

Alfarin nodded sagely. “Ah. And just at that moment, your friends began to suffer, yes?”

“Well... yes, that’s true.”

The old man chuckled. “Classic. As I said, the bond can remain dormant for, well, eons, I suppose. But if the former mind master undergoes a profound emotional event—such as falling deeply in love—the bond can be revived. And, as the master experiences great joy, his victims become the receptacle as the worst of his emotions drain away. And, vice-versa, too. It’s simply more apparent when things are... bad.”

“And, you know of a way to break the bond?” Frigga asked.

“I do. I’ve never had Midgardians involved, but it should work just the same.”

Farbauti turned to Frigga and Thor, a sly smile tugging at her lips. “My grandfather and I need to confer. But, we can help your Midgardian friends. Assuming we are able to attain something for ourselves along the way.”

Frigga smiled back, but there was steel in her eyes. “We don’t expect something for nothing, of course. But, please know—there are some things which are simply off the table.”

Farbauti tipped her head respectfully. “I do know that. But, there’s always more than one way to roast a boar. I’m sure we can come to a mutually satisfactory agreement. If you’ll excuse Alfarin and I for a moment?”

Frigga gave a small nod, and as their hosts left the room, she and Thor sat in contemplation for a long moment. Then, both reached for a pastry. Frigga took a small bite, while Thor popped his into his mouth, whole. Their eyes met, and Frigga drew out another kerchief and handed it to Thor. They both quietly spat out the inedible sweets and washed away the taste with coffee.


	31. What Steve Came For

Tony headed down the hall at a speedy pace, but as he approached the entryway to the living area, he came to an abrupt stop. He figured dealing with Loki had already used up about 99.9 per cent of his viable brain cells, and meeting with Cap was most likely going to require some fancy mental footwork. So, he took a moment to breathe deep, get focused, and put on his best game face before striding in with a totally fake bounce in his step and a broad, nearly-sincere grin on his lips. “H-e-e-e-y, Steve! Steve-o! Welcome back! Bring me anything?” Tony made a beeline for Steve, arms outstretched.

Captain Steve Rogers was standing straight and tall by the huge plate-glass window, staring out into the city. He had his shield on his back, and was wearing jeans, a t-shirt, and a worn tan leather jacket. He turned at Tony’s greeting and just managed to deflect the intended bear hug into a half hearty-pat-on-the-back, half handshake.

“Hey, Tony. No, sorry—no gift shops where I’ve been.” He gave Tony a rueful smile and stepped back, regaining a bit of his personal space.

Tony nodded knowingly. “Gotcha. Well, you okay, man? Want something to drink? You hungry...?”

“No, no, I’m fine. I spent all morning with Fury, and then I stopped to have lunch with Natasha on my way over here.” He gazed out the window a moment before adding, “She told me about Hawkeye and Selvig. Hell of a thing, huh?”

“Oh, shit, yeah. It’s rough. But, Thor’s on it. They’ll be all right.”

“I hope so.” There was a long pause in which both men studied the floor. Then, Steve gave Tony an appraising once over. “And... I heard about Loki.”

Tony’s head popped up like a prairie dog. “Yeah?” he said a little more sharply than he intended. “What about him?”

“Is he here?”

“Who wants to know?”

“Aw, come on, Tony. Don’t play games. I know he’s here—he lives here, right?”

“I do,” came a silky purr from the doorway. Loki was standing propped against the door frame, arms crossed, his hair a bed-ravaged wonder. He was wearing one of Tony’s too-tight t-shirts and it hugged his torso, failing to cover his slightly protruding belly. A pair of plaid pajama bottoms hung precariously just below it, lending a sort of pregnant sex-kitten air to the lanky mischief-god’s appearance.

Steve blinked. 

Tony swallowed hard. 

Loki grinned as he walked, hips shifting suggestively. He stopped in front of Steve and gave him a green-eyed all-consuming stare. “You’re looking well, Captain. Much better than the last time I saw you.”

Steve awkwardly cleared his throat. “Well... I could say the same about you. I guess everything, uh, healed up okay? You know, after the green guy...”

Loki laughed. “Oh, yes. I’m in fine physical shape these days.” He ran a hand over his stomach. “We both are, so far as I know.” His eyes narrowed and he jutted his chin towards Steve’s shield. “And, I intend to stay that way. So, no need for that, if you don’t mind.” 

Their eyes were locked on each other for a long moment, and then Steve pulled the shield from his back and propped it against the side of the couch. “I didn’t come here to cause trouble.”

“Which brings up a great question—why are you here? Really, I mean.” Tony couldn’t help feeling a little left out—Steve and Loki seemed to have forgotten he was even the room, they were eying each other so intently. 

“Couple of things. One, I guess I just, uh, had to see this for myself.” He gestured from Tony to Loki and back again. “Kind of hard to believe, you know? You two being a couple. I—”

“Yeah, well,” Tony said, bristling. “A lot’s changed since your time, old man. Gay people walk around in broad daylight now, no pretending to be something they’re not. We can get married. We’re main characters on TV shows, for chris’sakes. So, sorry to freak you out, but that’s how it is—get used to it.” Tony put an arm around Loki and pulled him close. He knew it was unnecessary to underline his words, but damn it, Loki was still staring a little too interestedly at Steve, and Tony figured it wouldn’t hurt to remind him of who, exactly, it was that had just rocked his world, and—

“You think that bothers me?” Steve asked, frowning. “Let me tell you something. If there’s one thing I learned from the war, it’s that there are a lot of things people make a big deal about that just don’t matter. Things like skin color, where you’re from, how you worship, who you love—things like that don’t make a damn bit of difference. What matters is, when you’re in battle? When the chips are down and lives are on the line? What matters is that you’re fighting for the same thing. And that’s the real reason I’m here.” Steve took a step closer to Loki, and Tony felt him tense against him. “I want to shake your hand.” Steve thrust out his hand to Loki, arm fully extended.

“I, uh... What?” The mild sneer Loki had been sporting morphed into a befuddled expression, which kind of made Tony’s heart sing. It wasn’t often he got to see his boyfriend knocked off his pins by somebody showing him honest respect, and he really, really liked it. 

Steve smiled. “You took your punishment for what you did, and now you’re turning your life around. It takes a lot of guts to do that. And, Fury told me what you did on Trondheim—risking your life to save our planet. That’s a hero in my book. So, I just wanted to say ‘thank you’ in person, and let you know I’m in your corner.” Steve’s hand remained outstretched.

Loki licked his lips, buying himself some time, but before he could gather his snarky wits about him, he blurted out, “Hero? I’m hardly that. Believe me, if it hadn’t been for Tony showing me there could be something more in my life than anger and hatred—” Loki cast an emotional glance at Tony. “...things might have gone in a very different direction. Very different. It’s him you should be thanking.”

“You’re not giving yourself enough credit. Sure, we all need someone to believe in us, but you’re the one that made it happen. And, I thank you for that.” Steve had lowered his hand, but now he offered it again, standing steadfast as he waited for Loki to respond.

There seemed to be a wrestling match going on in Loki’s mind, but at last he firmly grasped Steve’s hand and Tony watched them shake, wondering if the roof would cave in just from the sheer freakiness of it all. 

Loki had been pushing aside thoughts of Barton and Selvig ever since he and Tony had returned home, but now the image of Barton’s face twisted in anguish came back to him, and he wondered how much of a thank-you Rogers would have given him if he’d seen that for himself. But, he rather liked getting a vote of confidence from Captain America and decided to accept it for what it was worth. “Well... You’re welcome,” Loki said at last.

Steve’s smile deepened and then he went to pick up his shield. “All right. Listen guys, I’ve been up 48 hours straight, I kind of need to go home and get some sleep. It’s good to see you, Tony. And Loki, I hope things stay on the right path for you. Oh, and—” He indicated Loki’s tummy. “Sounds like the two of you are headed for a big adventure. Congratulations. I’m excited for you.”

Tony glanced at Loki’s bump and then gave Steve a quizzical look. “So, this doesn’t freak you out or anything? A dude with a bun in the oven?”

The rueful expression returned to Steve’s face. “I’ve seen some stuff, Tony. I’m not saying it didn’t take me a minute to wrap my head around this, but in the big picture? This isn’t the weirdest thing I’ve come across. And, it’s nice to come across a happy weird thing for a change. Congrats again, and best of luck. Can’t wait to meet the little one.” He tipped an invisible hat and then headed out the door.

Loki sighed tiredly, and Tony pulled him into his arms and rubbed his back soothingly. “So, on a scale of one to ten, how jealous should I be right now? I’m feeling kind of eleven-ish.”

Loki chuckled into Tony’s neck. “He’s a decent fellow and his ass looks splendid in Spandex, but I’m all yours, Stark. I’d say a minus one is about right.”

Tony was just formulating a comeback to that when a bank of black clouds rolled across the sun. A violent flash of lightening tore through the sky outside of the picture window and a second later, thunder rumbled through the tower. Loki groaned. “Oh, good. I was afraid things were about to get dull.”

“Hey, it’s okay. Maybe big brother has good news.”

“That is a spectacularly rare occurrence, but all right. Let’s see what he has to say.”

Loki stepped back, prepared for Thor to come barreling through the door, but instead Steve darted back in. “Hey, sorry, but it sounds like something’s going on up on the roof. I thought maybe I should stick around for a minute, just in case.”

Tony shrugged. “It’s fine. Point Break’s coming back from Asgard with some kind of hoo-doo potion thingy to get Selvig and Barton back from the ha-ha hotel, but sure. The more the merrier, I always say.”

The thud of heavy boots followed right behind Steve, and Thor lumbered in with a tight expression on his face. He brightened at the sight of Steve. “Captain Rogers! Excellent. I have need of you.” Thor pulled Steve out of the room and Loki and Tony watched as the thunder god spoke in a furtive tone to the Captain. Steve’s brow wrinkled and he gave Thor a puzzled look, but he nodded and turned to head down the hallway toward the elevator. Thor then came back and strode over to Tony.

“Friend Stark, I would have a word with you in private.” He glanced at Loki. “Perhaps while my brother troubles himself with getting properly dressed.”

Loki snarled. “Oh, no. _No._ I’m sick of being shuffled off to a remote chamber while people talk about me behind my back!” he snapped. “What do you think I’m going to do, rain a plague of toads upon the land? Whatever you have to say to Tony, you can say to me. I don’t care how bad it is, I can handle it.”

Thor’s worried expression faded and he gave Loki a gentle smile. “It’s not bad, Loki. It’s just a bit... unnerving. I thought it might behoove us to have Tony help me deliver the news.”

Now Loki was looking angry and puzzled. “Unnerving? Tell me what is going on immediately, or once I have my seidr back, I’ll turn you into a very fetching female bilgesnipe, one with lots of suitors, and—”

Thor heaved a big sigh and put his hand up defensively. “All right, all right, but you must take care not to become overwrought.”

“Overwr—” Loki made an exasperated sound. “Don’t tell me—you couldn’t find a way to help Barton and Selvig.”

“No, no! I did. It’s just that, it required bringing along some... visitors.”

“Visitors.”

“Yes. Mother is here—”

Loki’s scowl softened. “Mother? Well, that’s good.”

“Yes, but there are two others.”

The scowl returned. “Not Odin and one of his entourage, surely.”

“No. I brought...” Thor couldn’t quite put the words together and he looked helplessly at Tony, who gave him an uncertain but encouraging nod.

“It’s okay, big guy, spit it out.”

Thor took a breath and went to stand before Loki in order to look him in the eye. “I brought with me Queen Farbauti of Jotunheim, and her mage.”

Not a muscle in Loki’s face moved, but his stare could have boiled Thor’s eyeballs in their very sockets. “Jotunheim,” he hissed at last. He broke his gaze and glanced at Tony, shaking his head as if amused. “So, Jotunheim is now ruled by a female. How progressive of them. How did this come to be?” He looked back at Thor, one eyebrow raised in genuine curiosity.

“The Queen assumed the throne when her husband—died.” Thor studied his younger brother’s face, wishing he’d brought his mother downstairs with him instead of leaving her on the roof to keep their guests company. She was so much better at this sort of thing than he. It was clear by Loki’s uncomprehending expression that Thor hadn’t sufficiently made his point. In a grave tone he added, “She’s... Laufey’s widow.” 

“His widow.” Loki stood glaring, his hands on his hips, knowing that, in his usual clumsy way, Thor was getting at something—something awful, probably—but his brain seemed have clicked off in self-defense. When he continued not to react, Thor grasped Loki’s shoulders and said, “Yes, his widow. Loki, don’t you see? Farbauti is your birth mother.”

And, Loki’s brain didn’t like that at all.“Fuck...” he spat, his face contorting in rage. “Why would you do this, you great doddering idiot? How dare you? If you imagine for one moment that I would willingly allow her to stand before me, you are utterly delusional.” Loki’s breath was coming rapidly and his hands were clenched in tight fists. “Why did you bring her here? What business has she with all this?”

Thor spoke as soothingly as he knew how. “She wants to meet you, brother. It’s part of our bargain—”

“Bargain? Oh, lovely. How amusing for her! To meet the pathetic creature she sent off to die on a fucking block of ice—”

“No, Loki.” Frigga’s warm voice wafted through the room and the Allmother swiftly glided to her younger son’s side. “I’m so sorry, I know this is a tremendous shock to you. I would have done anything to make it easier for you, but Thor says your mortal friend’s life is in peril and there simply isn’t time, so please listen. Farbauti had nothing to do with Laufey’s actions. She thought you died at birth, she grieved for you—”

Loki’s eyes narrowed in a scornful sneer. “You believe that?”

“Yes.”

“Has it not occurred to you that the creature who birthed the God of Lies might be lying to you?”

“It has—but I believe her. She’s come here in good faith. All she wants is to see you, and to tell you her story herself. For this, she will have her mage break the bond between you and the sufferers, and then they will be back to normal.”

“Please, Loki,” Thor said quietly. 

Loki seemed a little calmer, but his eyes were snapping fire and he slowly shook his head. “When I completed my treatment on Asgard, I was told I could start my life anew. And yet, it seems I am to be forever punished. Why is it so difficult for you to understand? I don’t want this. Even if I did, it’s pure folly. She’s tricking you, she’s manipulating you both for her own entertainment, and by the gods, I won’t be used like that.”

Thor fought to hold down a burst of frustration. “We don’t have time for your unfounded suspicions, brother. Selvig is getting weaker. He—”

“I don’t care!” Loki’s voice was becoming raw as his anger dissolved into hot crushing pain. “This isn’t fair! I don’t want to see her, she’s nothing to me! _You’re_ my mother!” he shouted to Frigga. The words reverberated in the large, open room until he repeated, “You’re my mother,” so softly, so brokenly, that only she could make them out.

Frigga hastened to wrap her arms around him and smooth back his hair as she made soft shushing noises in his ear. “Of course I’m your mother, love. I always will be. And, meeting Farbauti will not change that.” Frigga held her son for a long moment before pulling back and laying her hand along the side of his face. “But, she did give birth to you—and, she lost you before she could even lay eyes on you. Can you imagine what that must be like? To carry a babe inside you, to feel him moving, and then to have him gone forever, without ever getting to see him, to hold him? Think how that would wound your soul.” Frigga looked deeply into Loki’s tear-filled eyes. “Please, Loki. It will be all right. You won’t regret it.”

Loki blinked back the tears. He’d tried so hard for so long not to think of this possibility. It had crept into his thoughts, of course. He’d known perfectly well that having rid the world of Laufey had eliminated only half of the... the monsters that had conceived him. But he’d managed to convince himself that he’d never have to confront the other one, and now, here she was, on Midgard, among his family. Imperiously demanding to meet him, as if it were her domain to rule. 

It was almost more than he could bear.

He angrily swiped at his eyes and drew himself up straight. “I’ve hated her from the moment I learned she existed. I can’t stand the thought of even looking at her. Do you really expect me to just stand there and... take it?”

Tony came to stand beside Loki. “I’ll be right here with you, babe.”

“And I, as well,” Thor said firmly.

“She means you no harm, Loki. She simply wants to complete a circle. You can understand that, can’t you?” Frigga squeezed Loki’s hand. “You’ve been so strong, my love. Be strong again, for the others’ sake. It’s the only way to help them.”

Exhaustion overcame Loki and he felt himself sway as his knees threatened to give out. Tony quickly slid an arm around his waist and guided him to the couch. “Come on, slugger. If she gives you one speck of trouble, ol’ Thor here’ll pop her with his magic hammer—right?” It occurred to Tony that he had absolutely no idea whether Mjolnir would actually work against a Jotun queen, but he glanced back at Thor and saw him nodding enthusiastically.

“That most certainly will not be necessary,” Frigga said dryly. “If things take a wrong turn, we will protect you, my love. But they won’t. I give you my word as the Allmother.” She sat down beside her son. “It’s the right thing to do.”

The tension in the room hung heavily as everyone watched Loki wrap his arms around himself and stare blankly at the floor. At last, he drew in a shaky breath and gave a slight nod. “Fine. Bring her to me,” he said gruffly. “Let’s get it over with.”

“I’ll return momentarily,” Thor said, relief palpable in his voice as he hurried to the door. “Put on some clothes!” he yelled on his way out, and Loki irritably rolled his eyes before getting up to go do just that.


	32. Lovely Jotunn Genes

Having been sent to deal with the visitors, Steve took the elevator up to the roof, per Thor’s rapid-fire instructions. As he stepped out of the car, he glanced around, recalling the mayhem Loki had caused the last time he’d had dealings with him; happily, the tower roof looked completely different now. At Bruce’s suggestion (and in the spirit of building a monument to peace or some shit,) Tony had had a lush green space created, with a vine-covered pergola at the center. As Steve approached, he saw within it the striking blonde woman Thor had described to him as his mother. She was sitting serenely on a bench beside a wizened blue-skinned old man, chatting amiably. 

Steve stood still, trying to acclimate himself to the sight of the strange man—he didn’t want to make some stupid blunder upon speaking to him, and sincerely hoped he could manage not to stare. But then his eye was caught by the being Thor had referred to as the Queen of Jotunheim, and he couldn’t have stopped himself from staring on a bet. 

She was standing at the roof’s edge, leaning forward with her palms propped on the encircling wall as she stared out into the city. Her head was thrown back and the wind was blowing her long black hair in swirls around her bare blue shoulders. Steve was mesmerized for a long moment, but then he remembered his purpose in coming up there, and, making use of his military training, he pushed aside a swell of curiosity in order to focus on his task. 

“Hello there!” he said over the bluster of the wind. All three guests looked at him and he raised his hand in greeting. “Hi! Uh... I’m Steve. Thor sent me to take you all to a more hospitable place to wait. Could you please come with me?” Steve had not the faintest clue how to address outer space royalty, so he just hoped being polite and respectful would get him by until someone corrected him.

Frigga reached him first and made the formal introductions, referring to Steve as “Thor’s friend, and brother in arms.”

Farbauti tilted her head and gave him a discerning look. “You are a warrior?” she asked, a bit skeptically, Steve thought.

“Well, we call them soldiers. But, yes, ma’am.”

Farbauti smiled. “Interesting. A Jotunn warrior of your age would bear the scars of battle.”

“Not all scars are visible, ma’am. And, I’m lucky enough to heal fast, faster than most.” Steve didn’t feel the need to explain exactly how old he really was, and with a noncommittal, “I see,” Farbauti seemed to accept his explanation well enough. 

Then, the three visitors followed Steve to the elevator.

Farbauti stopped short when the doors slid open. “This is a waiting chamber?” she asked suspiciously.

“Oh, no,” Frigga answered. “It is a Midgardian device meant to save trudging up and down numerous staircases. Humans have all sorts of mechanical contraptions which allow them to avoid physical exertion. Don’t worry, it is quite safe.”

Farbauti reluctantly joined the others in the car and gasped as it began its descent down to the penthouse. When the doors slid open, she marveled, “That was thrilling! Are there other devices such as this? Perhaps which go sideways?”

Steve fought down a chuckle. “No, ma’am, but we do have something called ‘roller coasters,’ which kind of have the same effect, only a thousand times faster.”

“Midgard is fascinating! Hardly the dull, backwards realm of fable.”

“Well, things weren’t always so fast and easy. There was something called the Industrial Revolution, and ever since then, life has gotten better in a lot of ways. Not so much in others,” Steve said wryly, thinking of the advances in technology that had come about since his pre-serum days, many of which only seemed to make it easier to kill a lot of people at once. 

They walked down the hall until they reached Tony’s office/sitting room, and Steve opened the door and gestured for everyone to go in. “Here we are. Please, make yourselves comfortable. JARVIS, Thor said you’d prepare some refreshments for the guests?”

“Yes, Captain Rogers. They’ll arrive shortly.”

Farbauti stared up at the ceiling to look for the source of the voice, her mouth open. Frigga smiled. “More Midgardian magic.”

A tea cart piloted by a small robot rolled in almost immediately, and Farbauti gave a squeal of delight. “Oh, a little mechanical creature! I’ve heard about such things, but I scarcely believed it. This is delightful!” 

Steve dismissed the robot and looked over the contents of the cart. “Looks like we’ve got sodas, iced tea, and, uh—Oreos? Seriously, JARVIS? This is what you serve to royalty?” Steve asked, grimacing.

“Tony keeps them in the refrigerator, sir. I thought that since our guests are from a frozen planet, they might prefer a cold snack.”

“Oh. Yeah, good thinking, I guess. Can I get anyone anything?” Steve asked, turning back to the visitors. 

“No, thank you,” Farbauti said as she moved around the room, looking at photos and knick-knacks. “I’m too excited to eat.”

“I’ll have tea, and one of the odd little pastries,” Alfarin said. “But, no trouble, young man, I’ll serve myself.” He got a plate and a glass and then took his snack to the beat-up couch and got comfortable.

Frigga was standing by the door, a troubled look on her face. “If you’ll excuse me, I’ll go find Thor and see what is happening with Loki.” She leaned in and said softly to Steve, “You’ll be all right?”

“Sure. I think we’re in good shape here.” He smiled reassuringly, and Frigga went off to find her sons. Alfarin discretely leaned over and nabbed another cookie.

*****

In Frigga’s absence, Steve gamely continued the conversation. “Uh... Mr. Alfarin? How exactly will you go about helping our friends? I mean, do you need anything, or...?”

“Oh!” Alfarin put down his third Oreo and delicately wiped his mouth with his sleeve. “Excellent question. I will require the presence of the two sufferers, as well as Loki himself. I will also need some sort of... receptacle.”

“Receptacle?”

“Yes. Into which to deposit the lingering energy.”

“I see. Well, what kind of receptacle did you have in mind? Like, a jar or can or something?”

Alfarin waved a hand dismissively. “No, no, it must be something... elemental. A chicken, perhaps.”

Steve’s eyes widened. “A chicken? You mean, a live chicken? Uh... I’m not sure where to get one of those here in Manhattan.”

Alfarin gave a thoughtful, “Hmm,” and added, “A goat?”

Steve chuckled. “I think we’d have better luck with the chicken.”

“Grandfather, didn’t you once use the branch of an alder tree for this purpose?” Farbauti asked. 

“Yes,” Alfarin mused. “Not the best results, but it was serviceable.”

“So, it doesn’t have to be a living thing?” Steve asked.

“No, it merely needs to be able to both absorb and emit energy.”

Steve’s brow wrinkled in thought, and then something came to him. “How about coal? I noticed Tony’s got an old coal-fire furnace down in the basement. I bet we could get all the coal we wanted from there.”

“What is ‘coal?’” Farbauti asked curiously.

“Uh... well, it’s this stuff that you burn and it gives off heat.”

“Ah! I believe that it is similar to haugmenn—remember, my Queen? The substance we used to mine from the lowlands? The Aesir once prized it for heating their homes. Yes, that would work very well.”

Steve nodded. “Great, I’ll get on that. Also, I can have Clint Barton here in just a pretty quickly, but I’m not sure about Selvig. Thor knows how to contact him, but I guess he’s... busy right now.”

Farbauti stopped her exploration and frowned. “Yes, he’s supposed to be fetching my s—Loki. This is taking a while, and I have to say, I grow impatient. Do you suppose there’s trouble?”

Steve raised his hands in a shrug. “I really don’t know, ma’am. I can’t say I know Loki very well. But, he does have a way of turning things on their ear. Thor might be having a little trouble convincing him.”

“Convincing him—of what?” 

Steve stared for a moment, trying to come up with a gentle way to say it. “Well, ma’am—I’m not so sure Loki will, you know—want to see you.”

“And, why wouldn’t he?” Farbauti asked, disturbed. “Thor promised to tell him I had no hand in his abandonment. Why wouldn’t he want to greet his birth-parent?”

“Uh... Well... Honest, Your Highness, I’m just spit-balling here, I could be way off. Maybe they’re just talking. Anyway, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Farbauti looked pensive as she came to sit beside her grandfather. She shifted uneasily, crossing and uncrossing her extraordinarily long legs, and then seemed to become aware of how fidgety she must appear to the Midgardian. She looked up at Steve and gestured at a chair. “Please sit down, Captain Rogers, there’s no reason for you to be uncomfortable on account of my unsettled state. It’s just that I hate being idle... I know, we shall pass the time telling tales. What has been your most valiant battle as a warrior?”

Steve sank into the chair and dropped his gaze to the floor. Jeeze, what a question. A flood of memories crowded in together, and he fought them back just as quickly. Finally, he looked up. “Ma’am, I don’t mean to be rude. But, that’s not something I care to think much about. Can’t we talk about something else?”

“Of course,” Farbauti said, giving him a quizzical look. “My apologies. It’s just that, on Jotunheim, warriors crow about the least little conflict as if they’d fought down a horde of vicious dwarves and dark elves all on their own. I’m hardly accustomed to such reticence! But, very well, tell me more about this ‘roller coaster’ machine you mentioned. Where does one find such at thing?”

“Usually in amusement parks. Let’s see, there’s a place called Coney Island not too far from here, and—”

Just then, Thor strode into the room. He had a deep frown on his face, but he managed to transform it into a smile as he looked at Farbauti. “Your Highness, Loki has agreed to see you. He is readying himself, but he asks that you be brought to him, and indeed, the living chamber is far more comfortable—”

Farbauti rose to her feet. “Agreed to see me...? He was reluctant?”

Thor got a bit of a deer in the headlights look about him. “Uh, well, he was... surprised. Surprised and a bit... taken aback, I’m afraid. But, it’s fine, I was able to convince him—”

“Convince him.” Farbauti looked down at her hands. “I don’t understand. I mean him no harm. I certainly don’t expect him to feel anything towards me but curiosity. Why is he so obstinate?”

Thor looked at a loss as he cast about for some sort of explanation. “Please do not take offense. It’s just that we grew up hearing tales of Frost Gi—the Jotunn people, of how fearsome and brutal they are.” Thor licked his lips, reluctant to go on, but Farbauti was listening intently. 

“Go on,” she urged.

“Monsters, they were called,” Thor said softly. “Loki discovered his true heritage in the worst possible way. So much anger came from that, so much... hatred. You know what he did to Laufey. Knowing what you are, what he is—I don’t think he’s quite ready to face the one who gave him birth. Perhaps he never will be. It is... difficult for him.”

Farbauti’s face crumpled and she abruptly rose to go stand by a window. The room was hushed, but Steve took Thor aside and explained that he needed him to contact Selvig and get him to the Tower as soon as possible. “I can take Queen Farbauti to Loki,” he added.

“That won’t be necessary,” the queen said in a quiet voice. 

“I’m sorry?” Steve asked.

Farbauti turned, her face a mask. “Tell Loki not to concern himself. I don’t wish to see him after all. Don’t worry, our bargain still stands. Go, the two of you should go, and take Alfarin with you to prepare for the healing. I’ll stay in this chamber until the ritual is successfully completed, and then we’ll return home. Tell Loki... tell him I don’t want to cause him any more pain. And, that I’m sorry. I was foolish to make such assumptions.” She straightened to her full height and shook back her hair. “And, tell him if he ever changes his mind... Well, I would be eager to meet with him under his own terms.”

Steve and Thor glanced at each other, and Thor gave a deferential bow. “I will take your message to Loki, and then I will fetch Selvig. Thank you, Your Highness, for your kindness to my brother, and to my friends.” Thor turned to Alfarin. “Sir, would you please come with me and tell me where you would like to conduct the healing?”

“Oh, yes, it’s best to do it in an open place with plenty of room to spread out. There’re sparks sometimes, you know...” The old man beamed cheerfully and slipped the last two Oreos into his pocket.

******

Farbauti was left alone in Tony’s crowded office with the door closed. She went back to gaze out the window, refusing to allow herself to cry. She concentrated on the wondrous city spread out before her, trying to imagine creating such soaring structures out of something other than blocks of ice, the joy of her imagination forcing down the ache in her chest. 

She barely heard the doorknob click. 

She turned to see a slim young man with long dark hair glide into the room. He stared at her, his eyes locked on hers like lasers. She gave him a smile, which he did not return. She felt sadness tug at the lines of her mouth, but she wouldn’t give in to it. She went instead for a neutral look and stared right back. “Who are you?” she asked, her voice strong and clear.

“I am Loki.”

Farbauti nodded; of course she’d known that, but hearing the words sent a soft quiver of excitement through her. “I am Farbauti.” She knew he knew, as well. It just seemed important to... to say it. She cleared her throat. “They told me you didn’t want to see me.”

“I didn’t.”

“And yet you’re here.”

Loki gave a curt nod. “Yes.”

“Why?”

“Banal curiosity. I wanted to see if the creature who spawned me was as ugly as my sire.”

A flash of irritation lit Farbauti’s eyes, but it passed as quickly as it had come, and now she wore a sly grin. “Oh, I see. You seek to provoke, to expose my true nature. Well, you’ll have to do better than that, little boy. You’re soft, all those years of pampering in your thin Aesir skin have ill-prepared you for going up against the Queen of Jotunheim.” She straightened to her full height and put her hands on her hips, suddenly eager to remind this pale, arrogant pup that she was not one of his foolish mortals, to be brought to tears by an unkind word or two.

Loki returned her grin. He was leaning against the door jamb with his hands behind his back, but now he brought one forward, and Farbauti sighed to see he was gripping a knife. Loki held it out and slowly turned it side to side, noting how the light from the window glinted off the long steel blade. It wasn’t elegant, and it certainly wasn’t as handy as the one he’d once carried in his belt, but it was serviceable enough.

“Perhaps I came here to give you the gift that I gave Laufey.”

Farbauti laughed. “That wouldn’t surprise me. You tried to kill me once before.” She raised a hand, and a thin sliver of jagged ice appeared in her fist.

A dark eyebrow jutted upward. “Did I?”

“Oh, yes. Your birth—it nearly killed me.”

“Perhaps I had good instincts, even as a newborn babe.”

“Well, you didn’t do a very good job of it. And, there have been plenty of times I would have found it a mercy if you’d succeeded.” She looked Loki up and down, curiosity plain on her face.

“Does my appearance displease you?” he asked irritably.

“No. But, it’s strange to see your Aesir face; in my mind, I’ve always seen you as Jotunn. Can you shift on your own, or are you too weak and unschooled to manage it?”

Loki huffed as he let his flesh transform; Farbauti was now standing transfixed before him. A soft smile crossed her lips and she reached out her free hand, but let it fall before touching Loki. “Oh...” she said. “That’s better.” She leaned in, carefully studying Loki’s every feature. “Gods. You look just like a portrait of my grandfather in his youth. Except, you have my mother’s nose, I think. Yes, definitely. And, her hair, she wore hers just like that, as do I.”

Loki’s mouth twisted into a cruel sneer. “Oh, how heartening, to be blessed with such lovely Jotunn genes. But, what of the creature that sired me, hm? What of him do you see in me?”

Farbauti’s delighted smile faded, replaced by a rueful look. “Well, you certainly have his charming disposition.” She eyed Loki warily, but he just chuckled and took a step toward her, holding the knife before him.

“Enough of this. Tell me why you’re here. Revenge?”

“No.”

Loki placed his free hand on his belly. “You’ve come to steal this child, then. A replacement for the one stolen from you.”

A spasm of grief crossed Farbauti’s face. “No!” she gasped. “Oh, you truly do think me a monster. My son, please—”

“Don’t call me that!” Loki snarled. 

“You are my son! I know it means nothing to you, but I’ve lived with your ghost for all these many years, and I only wanted to lay eyes upon your face one time, just one time, to prove you do exist. To prove my dreams were real and not manifestations of the madness Laufey visited upon me.” Tears were welling up and she seemed to lose her voice. She dropped the ice-blade and reached out a trembling hand, ignoring Loki’s knife, and gently touched her fingertips to his cheek. He jerked away and then swiftly brought the blade up to her throat. 

Farbauti dropped her hand, the mask returning to her face. She leaned away from the blade and stepped back, shaking her head tiredly.

“I could have asked for many things, you know,” she said with a touch of bitterness. “The Casket, not that there was a chance in Hel of that. But, funds to rebuild my battered realm, help in reopening the mines, a seat at Odin’s Council table... Instead, I chose you.” She sighed. “‘Such a clever queen,’ they’ll say, don’t you think? 'So good at barter.'” A grim chuckle escaped her. “They’ll see me for the sentimental fool Laufey always said I was.” She drew in a deep breath, suddenly looking older. She paid no attention to Loki’s weapon, but only turned and went to slump down into the couch.

Loki stood watching her and after a moment, he slid the knife into his boot. He still wore a suspicious expression, but he came to sit down next to her. “He hurt you.” 

Farbauti shrugged. “Spoils of war are the victor’s to do with as he pleases. In the end, I was nothing but a piece of property to him. Although... I think I disappointed him.”

“Oh?”

“Yes. I think... I think he truly believed I would come to love him. Hah! He was delusional on top of everything else. When it became obvious that my feelings for him would never change, he became more cruel. I had to learn his moods, find ways to make things work, for the sake of my boys.”

“Your boys?”

Farbauti smiled faintly. “Yes, Helblindi and Byleistr.”

Loki seemed to turn that over in his mind. “So, I have brothers,” he said thoughtfully. 

“Yes.”

“Are they like you, or like him?” he asked.

“They’re... like you.”

Loki’s eyes widened in mock dismay. “Oh, dear. I’m so sorry.”

Farbauti laughed out loud. “Silly! They’re the loves of my life. I wouldn’t change a thing about them.” 

Loki leaned forward, resting his chin on his clasped hands, and they were both silent for a long while. Then, Loki asked softly, “But, I’m like him, aren’t I?”

Farbauti turned with a critical frown, as if evaluating the evidence very seriously. “Well, let’s see. You brashly came to face someone you didn’t trust, prepared to fight to protect your unborn child, so you’re clearly not a coward. You’ve won the heart of someone who apparently cares for you very deeply, so you must have a loving spirit. You’ve regained the trust of your brother and kept the love of your mother, in spite of causing her great sorrow.” She let that sink in before adding, “No, Loki. You have a heart and a soul. You’re nothing like him.”

“But, I was. I did... terrible things.”

“You had a sickness. Maybe he did, too. But, you work to make things right. He would never have done that.”

Farbauti’s words zipped through his mind like hornets; he wanted to fight them, some balky part of him not wanting to be soothed by this... this stranger. But, he couldn’t. The words had strength and they rang true, and he found himself confessing, “I’m trying to get better. I want to become worthy of the love I’ve inexplicably been given.” He absently ran his free hand over his stomach. “I want to be... different. For the little one. I don’t ever want him to hate me the way I—” Loki’s voice caught and he looked away.

Farbauti shifted closer to him and gently lay a hand on his shoulder. “Loki... You’re doing so well. You mustn’t hold that hatred so close. It will rot your soul. I know, believe me. Every day I face the damage and destruction Laufey brought down upon our realm. If I let hate consume me, I could never help anyone, could never find the inspiration to rebuild, or to heal myself. I know you know that—just, please—remember it.” 

 

Loki turned and held her gaze for a long time, seeming to want to... to absorb her, to peer into her soul. Farbauti made no effort to shield herself, instead wordlessly offering her son whatever she had that he could use. The energy built between them, until finally a spark of green ice so cold it felt blistering hot shot between them. It lingered in the air for a moment, and then it cracked, sending tiny particles of ice to fall among the cushions and melt. 

Loki stared in awe. “Gods. I’ve never had that happen before.” Strangely, a sense of peace was beginning to settle within him. He questioningly raised his eyes to Farbauti.

“It’s a Jotunn healing technique. I learnt it when I was small. I’d almost forgotten how to do it. But, when I felt the pain in your heart, it all came back to me—I didn’t even have to think about it. It won’t last long, unfortunately, but at least it will give you some relief this day.”

By now, the tension had drained out of both of them, and they settled back against the couch in an easy silence.

Farbauti was the first to speak. “Well. Shall we go see how Alfarin’s preparations are coming along?”

“Of course. I’m very interested to see your mage do this work.” Loki got to his feet.

“That mage is your great-grandfather, you know,” Farbauti noted as she rose.

A frown crossed Loki’s face. “Really? And you say I look like him? That doesn’t bode well for my future appearance.”

“Nonsense. He was imprisoned in Laufey’s dungeons for eons. That’ll age you, lad, believe me.”

Loki paused as they reached the door. “I’m sorry you—you and your people—suffered so,” he said softly.

Farbauti stopped as well and looked into Loki’s eyes. “I’m sorry for what you went through.”

Loki nodded and changed into his Aesir form. “Come. They’re in what is known as the ‘living room.’” He led Farbauti there, where by this time everyone was gathered—Steve at the window talking with Alfarin, Tony and Frigga sitting on the couch, chatting. Clint and Natasha were standing by the bar, and Thor was busy introducing Jane and Dr. Selvig around. Just then, Pepper and Bruce stepped out of the elevator and came in through a side door.

Everyone looked up as Loki and Farbauti entered and all conversation abruptly came to a halt.

“Well, all right! Looks like the gang’s all here!” Tony suddenly said with all the enthusiasm he could scrape together. 

Loki looked first at Clint, and then at Dr. Selvig. He turned to Alfarin and tipped his head respectfully. “Are the preparations complete?” he asked.

“Yes. We’re all ready,” Alfarin said with relish.

Loki drew himself up into a regal pose. “Very well, then. Let’s get started.”

There was a brief moment of absolute stillness, and then everyone began moving at once.


	33. The Healing

Tony and Alfarin had set up four chairs. There was a small table in the middle on which a fist-sized lump of coal had been placed. Alfarin took a moment to say that Clint and Dr. Selvig needed to sit across from each other, with Loki between them. Neither man looked happy about that, but they went to take their seats.

From the other side of the room, Tony came headed straight for Loki. Farbauti leaned down and asked,“Who’s that?” 

Loki smiled. “Allow me to introduce you.” 

Loki met Tony halfway, falling into a full-body hug that Tony gratefully returned. They swayed together, both in desperate need of a moment of reconnection. Then, Loki pulled back and said softly, “I want you to meet someone,” and he led Tony to stand in front of Farbauti. “Tony, this is Her Majesty, Queen Farbauti of Jotunheim. Your Majesty, this is Tony Stark. He is my mate.” Farbauti didn’t miss the note of pride in his voice.

“Ah! Well, hello,” she said cheerfully.

“Uh—yeah, hi there,” Tony said, sticking out his hand. Farbauti pulled hers back.

“I’m so sorry, but you’re mortal, yes? I’m afraid I can’t touch you. Your flesh would freeze.”

“You can warm yourself, though,” Loki said to Farbauti. When she looked puzzled, he prompted her with quick instructions. She looked uncertain, but she took a moment to close her eyes and breathe deeply. She then opened them, looked down at her hands, and turned to proffer them to Loki.

“Did it work?”

Loki took her hands in his and nodded. “It did.”

Farbauti shook her head. “How did you know to do that? I had no idea it was even possible.”

“It... came up in conversation one night,” Loki said with a wink at Tony. He choked back a grin at the thought of the first time he’d done that little trick in Tony’s bed. “Anyway, it’s fine—Tony, you may shake Her Majesty’s hand.”

Tony quickly offered his hand again. “It’s nice to meet you, Mrs., uh, Queen, uh—”

“Call her Your Majesty,” Loki supplied. 

“Your Majesty.” Tony’s hand was enveloped by Farbauti’s, but even so, he managed a hearty handshake.

“My, he’s a little one,” Farbauti murmured to Loki. She glanced at Steve, standing nearby. “Are most Midgardians like him, and this one’s unusually small—or is it the other way ‘round?”

“Midgardians come in all shapes and sizes,” Loki said affectionately. He pulled Tony to him and kissed him on his head. “And this one’s mine. I like him.”

“I’m so fucking happy for you two,” Clint Barton snarled from where he was sitting. “But, can we get on with this?”

“Clint,” Natasha tsk’d. “Language.”

“Oh... yeah. Sorry, ladies. Rogers. I’m a little on edge right now.” 

“You have a right to be,” Farbauti said crisply. “But, all will be well quite soon. My grandfather is the most gifted mage I have ever known.” She thought a moment and then glanced at Loki. “So far, at least.”

Loki gave her a half-smile before turning to survey the room as he and Tony walked to the circle. “What’s Banner doing here?” he hissed.

“Thought it might be good to have someone with medical knowledge on hand in case Selvig, you know, blew a gasket or something.”

Loki gave him a sharp look and then went up to Alfarin. “Which reminds me—are you certain this procedure will in no way harm my baby?”

A fond smile crossed Alfarin’s face. “Absolutely. You must trust me, young one—I have done this many times. No one will experience any ill effects, except possibly the lump of coal. Now, please—have a seat.”

Alfarin then turned to stand before the group of bystanders, which now included Jane, looking on anxiously from Thor’s side. The mage pulled himself up to his most regal, if slightly hunched over, pose and said, “Good people of Midgard, I am pleased to be able to offer you my services to end your comrades’ affliction. I daresay you will find the procedure of some interest. However, I ask you to please stay back from the circle for your own safety.” 

He first went to Dr. Selvig, and with a hand on the seated man’s shoulder, he leaned down and said something quietly in his ear. He did the same for Clint and then Loki before he picked up the coal and cradled it in his broad palm. The three seated men lay their hands in his, making sure there was skin contact with the coal. Alfarin sat down and placed his other hand on top of theirs. He closed his eyes and soon everyone noted that the room began to feel colder.

“Whoa, that HVAC guy’s clearly been ripping me off,” Tony said in a stage whisper to Bruce. “I’m going to cancel my contract.”

“Shh!” Bruce admonished.

“But, it’s freezing in here!”

“Merely a temporary redirection of energy, young man,” Alfarin said in a dreamy voice without opening his eyes. “No cause for alarm.”

By now, everyone’s attention was focused on the four in the circle. Bruce kept an eye on Selvig, looking for any sign of distress, but the man appeared perfectly calm as he peered curiously at Alfarin. 

Loki had a mild sneer on his face, but Tony felt certain that was a result of having to be in close physical proximity to Barton. Clint himself just looked baffled, his eyes never leaving the point of contact between their hands. 

And, so it went for several long... quiet... uneventful minutes.

To the point that Tony was getting seriously bored. He idly wondered if it was bad form to pour a shot of whiskey while an outer-space healing ritual was going on; he figured that it was, but he was just about to risk it when he heard Pepper gasp. He quickly looked to the circle and saw a soft golden light emanating from between Alfarin’s fingers. The old man made a sharp grunt as if he’d been hit in the stomach, and he began rocking back and forth. 

As everyone watched, the shimmering light grew stronger and brighter, and tiny yellow sparks flicked higher and higher into the air. The glow slowly shifted from gold to red to green. Suddenly, all the oxygen in the room seemed to evaporate for an instant, leaving everyone startled, but with no ill effects. Loki dropped his head, seeming to lose consciousness, but before Tony could react, he straightened and blinked at the light.

Now, Clint and Dr. Selvig wore expressions of utter fascination as the light gradually turned icy blue. The air was warming around them, and the whole room returned to a normal temperature within seconds. At last, Alfarin opened his eyes and regarded the light under his palm. He smiled, pleased, and lifted his hand. He nodded at the other three and they slowly pulled back their hands. Alfarin’s remained outstretched, and a collective “oh!” went through the room as everyone saw that, in place of the grimy black lump of coal, a glimmering blue diamond lay nestled in his palm. His hand began to tremble and he looked as if he might drop it.

Loki stared. In what appeared to be an instant reflex, he reached out to take the gem, but Frigga appeared beside him and then, somehow, the gem was in her hand. She looked down at her son, and Loki met her eyes. He dropped his hand and slumped back, gazing dully at the floor. Frigga bent down and planted a kiss on his cheek before stepping away from the circle. 

Alfarin watched regretfully as she dropped the diamond into her bosom.

*******  
It took everyone a moment to fully grasp what had just happened.

Bruce checked a blood pressure monitor he'd strapped onto Dr. Selvig’s arm and then took his pulse. When he finished, he smiled. “Perfectly normal vital signs. How do you feel, sir?”

“Good,” the older man said nodding. “Better than I have in... a long time.” He still had a prickly look about him when he glanced at Loki, but he sounded untroubled. 

“Wow.” Clint was regarding his hand in amazement. “I feel great. I didn’t realize there was such a weight hanging over me, but it’s gone, completely gone.”

Tony made his way to Loki and hugged him from behind. “How about you, slugger? You and Junior doing okay?”

Loki gripped Tony’s arm and nodded. “Yes, we’re fine.” He looked up and smiled a little. “We’re fine,” he repeated firmly.

“Well, whew,” Natasha said. “So, that’s it? What do we do now?” she asked Alfarin.

“The cleansing was successful. You may all do as you wish.”

A party atmosphere settled in as everyone began moving about and chatting. Tony went around offering drinks, joking and making needed introductions, although he left Thor to handle having his mother meet his mortal girlfriend. At one point, he noticed Loki off in a corner speaking earnestly with Thor and Frigga, and he would have given a lot to know what that conversation was all about, but Clint was asking if he had any limes, and Tony had to go on safari into his kitchen to find some.

******

Clint and Natasha were the first to leave, followed by Jane and Dr. Selvig. Bruce and Pepper went with them to share a cab.

Eventually, Frigga gently reminded the visitors from Jotunheim that she needed to return home and she was sure they did, too. Farbauti smiled sadly as she agreed. “Yes, of course. It is time. But, this trip to Midgard was an amazing journey. I know it’s foolish, but I hope someday to return. I very much would like to ride a ‘roller coaster.’ Perhaps the good Captain could see after me in that regard?” She gave Steve a sly grin, and he looked a little startled, but he nodded with some enthusiasm. “I’d be honored to take you to Coney Island, ma’am. I bet Tony could arrange some sort of... private party?”

“Sure.” Tony nodded thoughtfully. “That’d be great, I haven’t been in years. I bet Loki would love it, too. Maybe we could do it sometime after the baby comes—they don’t let pregnant people on any of the good rides.”

Farbauti’s sad smiled returned. “Ah, the baby. I wish I could be here for that event as well.”

Loki shrugged. “Perhaps something can be arranged.”

The Jotunn queen turned to him and placed a warmed hand on his cheek. “Thank you for agreeing to meet me, Loki. I realize now it was a very selfish request, and I regret that. But, it meant more to me than you can imagine.”

Loki gave her a rueful smile. “I have no regrets, Your Majesty. Someday, I would like to... sit with you and Alfarin, and learn of my ancestry.” Alfarin came up to join them and he nodded happily.

“Oh, our people have a proud heritage, young one. A great tale to tell!”

“Well. I will look forward to that, then.”

Frigga took Farbauti aside and spoke quietly to her. After a moment, Farbauti gave out a whoop of excitement, and then she turned back to Loki. “Is this true? You have convinced your mother and Thor to take our petition to Odin?”

“Of course. I consider anything that serves to irritate the Allfather a worthy cause.”

“What’s that all about?” Tony whispered to Thor.

Thor rolled his eyes but smiled. “Loki has persuaded us to seek Father’s permission to help the Jotunn re-open their mines. I will go myself, and with the use of Mjolnir, we should give them a good start. After that, it will just require funding, which of course he can easily afford.”

“You think the old guy’ll go for that?”

“He will, with some persuading. Once Jotunheim is again recognized as a viable trade partner, there will be far less tension among the realms. He wants that, although of course it will behoove us to convince him that it was his idea all along.”

Tony gave a shrewd nod. “Your mom’s good at that kind of thing.”

“Indeed. Well, I must get everyone back to their homes. Thank you for everything, Man of Iron. Jane was most concerned about Selvig, and I could see the Archer was suffering greatly. Perhaps now everyone can be at peace with one another.” 

“Yup. Well, be careful, big guy. Don’t drop anybody.”

“I shall endeavor not to,” Thor said gravely, but there was a twinkle in his eye.

It took some doing, but Thor finally managed to gather his little group of travelers together for departure. Loki followed them up to the roof to say his goodbyes.

Once they were gone, Steve and Tony stood together at the picture window, watching the burst of thunder and lightening left in their wake.

“That... this whole thing... It was incredible,” Steve said softly.

“Yeah. Boy, having interstellar in-laws makes for fun family get-togethers, doesn’t it? I can hardly wait for Thanksgiving.”

Steve gave him a friendly shot in the arm. “In-laws. You and Loki. Geeze, Tony, I still can’t believe it. How’d you two get together, anyway?”

Tony shrugged, a faraway look crossing his face. “He showed up in my kitchen one morning and said he was sorry. After that? I didn’t ask too many questions. It all just kind of... happened.”

“But, you’re happy.”

Tony grinned. “Yeah, I am. I’m his mate, apparently.”

“I kind of envy you.” Steve now had a faraway look of his own, but it disappeared and his eyes widened as he realized what he’d just said. “Having someone, I mean. Not being with Loki.”

Tony’s grin deepened. “Oh, I don’t know—that icy Jotunn blood... Queen Farbauti seemed like she was a little bit sweet on you.”

“Uh... yeah, well, she lives on a different planet, so...”

“Long distance relationships can work if you try hard enough.”

“Ha-ha, yeah... Listen, Tony—I need to go. Like I told you, I’ve been up for days and I could really use some sleep.”

“I hear you. And, I was just kidding about Farbauti, although, you could do worse, you know? Did you see how she was built?” Tony gave a low wolf-whistle. 

Steve gave a stoic nod, and added, “She really is good-looking.”

“Yeah! And, don’t worry, you’d get used to that little something extra.” He winked lasciviously, leaving Steve with a puzzled look.

“Huh?”

Tony leaned in and explained how, exactly, it was that Loki could be male and still carry a baby. Steve blinked repeatedly and stared straight ahead.

“I gotta go.” He strode to leave, pausing to raise a hand in farewell. “Say bye to Loki for me. I, uh... Well, just say bye.”

Tony saluted. “Will do, Captain.” He then turned to look for his boyfriend, but realized he hadn’t come back to the living room yet. 

Tony headed to the elevator and strode out onto the roof.


	34. Like Any Other Drug

Loki was leaning at the roof’s edge, crossed forearms propped on the wall. It was a rather nice pose for showcasing his ass; Tony stood silently for a moment, soaking up the sight with deep appreciation. 

But, Loki didn’t appear to notice him. Tony cleared his throat, not wanting to startle his lover, although he suspected Loki knew perfectly well he was there. When Loki continued to stare out into the forest of tall buildings, Tony walked up, slipped an arm around his waist, and joined him in his city-gazing. “Hey, gorgeous,” he said softly.

Loki still ignored him, but after a moment he asked, “What?” in an impatient tone.

Well, that wasn’t the response Tony was expecting. He was looking for something along the lines of, “Hey, yourself, handsome,” or, “Oh, there you are, sexy,” or (by far the more likely,) “Where the bloody hell have you been? I want ice cream.” But he managed to answer smoothly just the same. 

“Just wondered what you were doing up here all by yourself, now that the galaxy-hoppers are gone.”

Loki turned to face him with narrowed eyes, his lips a thin line. “Did it ever occur to you that a man alone on a rooftop might be seeking privacy?” The words came out cold and snapped off, like a whip being cracked. 

Tony took a step back and raised his hands defensively. The wind was tangled in Loki’s long black hair, making it dance around his face, and his green eyes had a hard glint to them that Tony wasn’t used to seeing. It made him think of sparking wires, of shards of glass. “Okay. Shit. Didn’t mean to interrupt your ‘me’ time, but would you mind telling me what the fuck is wrong? I mean, we’re still boyfriends, right? Nothing’s happened in the last ten minutes to make you want to give back my letter jacket or let the air out of my tires, right?”

“Shut up, Stark. You’re a blind, stupid mortal, just like the rest of them.” Loki gave a scornful “hmph” and gestured at his stomach. “Not that I’m any better. Gods, this was a terrible mistake. I should have got rid of it right away, I should have left this useless planet and never looked back. I should have—”

_“Whoa!_ All right now, stop it.” Whatever bit of intimidation Tony might have felt was gone, and in its place, the clear-minded detachment of a person walking into a minefield. “Just... stop.” Tony stepped forward and put his hands on Loki’s shoulders, meeting his eyes with laser-like intensity. “What the hell happened? I know it was traumatic, meeting your—meeting Farbauti, but I thought everything was okay. Did she say something to hurt you? Did Thor...? ‘Cause if he did, I’ll put on the suit and beat the living crap out of him, I’ll—” 

At that, Loki gave a harsh laugh. “If you think I’m still capable of being wounded by that donkey-brained oaf, you truly haven’t learned a thing about me. No, no, no. It’s nothing like that.” He let out a shaky breath. “It’s the gem.” 

“The ‘Jim?’ Is that anything like ‘The Stig?’”

Loki irritably lifted his eyes to the heavens. “The stone. The stone that was left after the healing.” Loki returned Tony’s stare and his voice had a serpentine hiss to it. “I _wanted_ it. But Mother took it away with her.”

Tony dropped his hands and chuckled in relief. “Is that all? Damn it, babe, why didn’t you just say so? I can get you diamonds! Buckets of ‘em, if you want. I mean, I never thought you were the Liberace type, but there’s nothing wrong with a little bling. Look, we’ll go shopping, and I’ll get you the biggest fucking diamond we can find, and—”

“It’s not the diamond, fool! It’s the power within it!”

“Huh?”

Loki made a strangled sound. “Oh, for... Don’t you see? The gem is imbued with the power of the Tessaract! Do you know what I could do with that?”

Tony’s nostrils flared, and he cockily planted his feet apart, folded his arms, and leaned back as full comprehension came to him. “No, Shakespeare, I don’t. Why don’t you tell me?”

Loki just shook his head and returned to his spot at the wall. Tony came to stand beside him and looked down, gesturing at the busy streets below. “What could you do, Loki? You still want all this for yourself? You want to rule those blind and stupid mortals? Have ‘em pay tribute to you, build giant statues in your likeness, name libraries after you?” Abruptly, Tony spun Loki around to face him. “You still want someone to kneel before you? Well, here you go.” Tony sank to his knees, and then he threw his arms wide apart. “I await your orders, O Great and Powerful Loki! I’m yours to command, just tell me what you want!”

Loki stood above him, his face taut as plaster about to crack. But, gradually, the hard edge softened and slipped away, leaving Loki biting his lip in a rueful grimace. He slowly lowered himself until he was eye to eye with Tony. “Nothing,” he said quietly. “I swear, Tony—I don’t want anything more than I already have.” He cautiously lifted his arms as if afraid that Tony would pull away. When he didn’t, he eased himself into Tony’s embrace, and Tony instantly wrapped him tightly against his body. 

“Okay... But then, why did you say all those really shitty things? ‘Cause, they were pretty damn shitty,” the billionaire asked, trying to sound casual. But Loki could hear the hurt underneath.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. But, you have to understand...” Loki leaned back, his brows knit as he sifted through broken thoughts. “The moment I saw that stone, I wanted it. It wasn’t even a rational notion, it was a... a physical _need._ What if I’d used my magic to get it? What _would_ I have done with it?” His voice was raspy, and Tony caught a glimmer of tears in Loki’s eyes. 

“What if it all went wrong?” Loki continued. “I could have lost everything. You, our baby, my very life... I’ve worked so hard. I’ve tried my damndest to change, and I thought I was better, I thought I was past all that. I actually thought I was... okay. And in one tiny flash, I could have thrown it all away.” He stared hard at the cement and then turned a brittle look at Tony. “I said those things because I wanted you to hate me. I wanted you to turn from me, now, before I... before I—”

“Well, it didn’t work, smart guy.” Tony read the pain and confusion in Loki’s eyes as he smoothed wild tendrils away from his face. He pulled him back into his arms and held him for a while, considering exactly what to say. The words didn’t come easily, because he didn’t know what the hell he could say to a thousand-year-old god suffering a crisis of self-doubt, but he felt like a lot of stuff was bubbling up right under the surface, and it was important that he got it right. So... he did what he did best, and started talking about himself.

“Hey. Listen to me. Power is an addiction, right? Just like drugs or booze. Once you’ve gone down that road, it’s fucking hard to turn back. I know how that feels. You don’t think I’d still love to get piss-in-my-pants-wake-up-in-vomit drunk once in a while? I would. But, I don’t.” He sat back on his heels, holding Loki’s gaze. “I knew a long time ago that booze and I had a complicated relationship. It’d be easy for me to go off the deep end. I’m lucky, because so far, I’ve been able to pull back when I got to the edge. But, I’ve had to work at it, and believe me, there’ve been times when I almost didn’t make it.” He planted a kiss on the side of Loki’s mouth, tasting the salty path of a tear. “And, know this—if you hadn’t come along, I don’t know if I’d have found the strength to keep fighting.”

Loki gave him a aggrieved look. “But, I’m not like you, Tony. There’s something wrong inside me, in my head. I try to ignore it, but...”

“Uh-uh—don’t beat yourself up. _Think._ Today, you looked the devil in the eye, but you’re still here with me, not hovering over the city trying to subjugate the human race. You said it yourself—you could have used magic to take that rock. You could have wrestled your mom for it. But, you didn’t.” Tony gently lifted Loki’s chin. “You’re stronger than you think. So what if you’re jonesing for it now? Are you zipping off to Asgard to mug Frigga?”

That made Loki break into a smile. “No.”

“No, because you know how much is at stake, just like I do. I don’t want to lose you, and I know you don’t want to lose me, ‘cause I’m so damn awesome.” He caressed Loki’s face. “It’s not recovery if you never have to face temptation, babe. You did; and, you came out on the other side. Now you know what that feels like, and you’ll be ready if it happens again. I call that a win.”

Exhaustion had crept into Loki’s body, leaving him weak and light-headed. He gave a shuddering sigh and lay his head on Tony’s shoulder. “Well... You’ve given me much to think about, but the positive self-talk will have to wait. Right now, I’m tired. I’m just... too tired.” Embarrassingly, his stomach growled, and that made Tony grin.

“Okay, that’s it. I’m not letting you go through emotional trauma AND be hungry.” Tony rose to his feet and pulled Loki up as well. “Come on. I’m making you some lunch, and then you’re taking a nap, got that? We can talk about shiny blue rocks and world domination after you wake up.”

An abashed look came over Loki. “In fairness, I doubt that the stone would have given me the power to fully effect world domination,” he confided.

Tony slid an arm around him as they walked to the elevator and got in. “What, then?”

“I don’t know for certain... Enhanced magical abilities, I suppose. Maybe improved stamina, faster reflexes...”

“Oh, like PF Flyers.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Old brand of sneakers. The tag line was they’d help you to ‘run faster, jump higher.’”

“Mm, something like that.”

“Huh, maybe I need it.”

Loki chuckled. “In bed, definitely. Otherwise... you’re about as physically advanced as it’s possible to be, given your age. Good thing you invented the suit.”

Tony gave a fake laugh. “You know what? When you’re not pregnant, I’m definitely giving you a spanking.”

By now, most of the tension had left Loki’s body, and he smirked, pleased. “And, I look forward to it.” A wicked grin followed. “My hindquarters yearn to feel the blessed sting of your hand as you thrash me, as you warm my tender flesh with your open palm—”

Tony frowned. “Okay, ‘fess up—did you grow up reading Victorian porn novels or what?”

“I grew up reading all manner of ‘porn novels,’ and don’t pretend it doesn’t get you hot when I talk that way.” Loki leaned in and nibbled Tony’s neck, and he in turn went for Loki’s lips, murmuring, “Mm. Well, you have me there,” as they melted into a deep kiss that lasted until the elevator doors slid open.

******

Tony was impressed to find fresh sandwich fixings in his refrigerator—someone was on the ball around there, although he didn’t know if it was Pepper, Happy, or maybe a forward-thinking JARVIS—and he made sandwiches and heated up a can of soup to go with them. 

Loki dutifully ate, grateful to feel his head clearing and strength returning to his limbs. But he made no argument when Tony steered him toward the bedroom and informed him that it was time to go beddie-bye for a couple of hours. Tony got him out of his shirt and trousers and into bed, and then he tucked a light blanket around him. He fluffed a pillow and stuck it behind Loki’s head, and kissed him before saying, “Now, settle down and get some rest. I’ll be down in my lab if you need anything.” That produced a displeased frown from Loki.

“I have a better idea. Lie down with me,” Loki commanded, patting the bed.

Tony had almost made it to the door, but he turned and gave him a reproving look. “Oh, no you don’t. You’re going to nap. No funny business.”

“I know. Just... stay with me until I fall asleep.” Loki’s petulant expression faded and turned to long-lashed, big-eyed hopefulness. “Please?”

Tony wasn’t a pushover, normally. He took great pride in his bullshit detection system. But, hearing the word “Please” come out of Loki’s mouth did something freaky to him, and the sight of those huge green eyes looking at him so trustingly, so imploringly, made him forget that he hadn’t been allowed to tinker down in his lab for days. Slowly, with mock-reluctance, he slid off his jacket and shoes and headed to the bed.

Loki happily scooted over to make room for him; when Tony lay down, he wriggled in to press his bare back to Tony’s chest, grabbed his arm and secured it snugly around his waist. He then sighed contentedly. “Ah, that’s better. So nice when you cooperate, Stark. Almost makes me think you like me.”

Tony snickered. “I more than like you, babe.” He nuzzled behind Loki’s ear, enjoying breathing in the little trace of wildness that lingered there, that scent Tony used to pick up when Loki apparated right in front of him, the scent of hurtling between distant worlds in his hair, on his skin. Tony hugged him tightly. “I love you. Please, please don’t ever doubt that.”

Loki gave his hand a squeeze. “Oh, I don’t,” he said airily. “I’ve given you plenty of opportunities to get out of this mess, yet here you are. You clearly lack the intelligence NOT to love me.” He looked over his shoulder and grinned. “I rely heavily on that fact.”

“You are in for such a spanking.”

“I can take anything you can dish out, mortal.”

“Yeah, don’t write a check your ass can’t cash, hot shot.”

Loki gave a low chuckle, and stilled. Tony felt him relax against him, his breathing slowing, but just as visions of getting into his tool cabinet were filling Tony’s brain, Loki jerked awake. “Sh-sh-sh,” Tony said in a soothing whisper. “It’s okay. Go to sleep.”

“Rub my back,” Loki whispered in return.

Tony rolled his eyes, but began tracing fingertips over the defined bones and muscles of Loki’s back. Again, he could feel Loki slipping into sleep, but again, Loki’s head popped up. He gave an exasperated sigh. “I’m too tired to sleep. I ache all over and my mind won’t rest.” He irritably punched a fist into his pillow and buried his face in it. “What’s wrong with me?” he asked, his voice muffled from its depths.

“Just a wild guess, but I think it’s called ‘pregnancy,’” Tony deadpanned. “I think I can help—you just have to promise to obey my instructions.”

Loki slowly raised his head and cast a suspicious glance at Tony. “I can’t imagine that this is a good idea, but all right. What do I have to do?”

“Nothing. Not a goddamned thing. Just stay still and let me take care of you.”

“Hmm. Sounds... do-able, I suppose. All right, go ahead.”

Tony slid one arm around Loki’s shoulders and the other hand onto Loki’s chest. He ran tickling caresses over his torso before giving each nipple a tug and a roll between his thumb and forefinger. Loki arched against him, and Tony made a warning noise. “Uh-uh. Stay still.”

“Okay.”

Tony slid his hand lower, lovingly cradling the little baby-bulge of Loki’s tummy, and then gently massaging the sensitive skin all around it. Loki moaned and pushed his bottom back into Tony’s crotch. “Nope,” Tony reproved. _“Still.”_

“But—”

“I can stop right now.”

“Ugh, fine.” Loki resolutely settled back.

Tony teased at the band of Loki’s underwear, running a finger just under it, back and forth. He pulled them down, freeing Loki’s cock, and Loki gasped when he was taken in hand. He let out a sigh when Tony gripped him firmly and gave the velvety flesh long, unhurried strokes. Loki thrust up into his hand. “Tony, please. More.”

“Okay, do you even know what ‘relax’ means? This is just to relieve a little tension, think of me as your disembodied, but very friendly, right hand. I’m doing all the work, you just lie there.”

“But, you’re making me feel all tingly...” Loki whined rather pathetically. 

“Yeah, and it’s going to feel really, really good in a minute, but you better not move that sweet little ass of yours, or I’m done.”

Loki made a frustrated huff, but forced himself to hold still. Tony began working his cock in earnest, alternating with dipping down and cupping his balls, rolling them in his hand. 

“Tony, shit!” Loki bucked up against Tony’s solid form, and received a light smack on his bottom for his trouble. Tony was holding Loki around his neck with his free arm, and he tightened his grip to hiss in his ear. “Okay—last warning. Do it again and I’m out of here.”

“All right, all right! Don’t go.” Loki obediently settled quietly against him.

“That’s better. Now, relax.” Tony went back to his ministrations, eventually giving in and allowing Loki to meet his strokes with eager thrusts. It didn’t take long for Loki to come after that; he grunted with his release and Tony felt warm liquid wet his fingers. “Good boy.” He gave Loki a smooch and left him panting among the bedclothes while he went to the bathroom to wash up. He fetched a cloth and wiped the sheets dry, noting that, in just that short time, Loki had finally fallen asleep. Tony covered him up again, gave him another kiss, and quietly slipped out of the room to enjoy a little “me time” of his own down in his lab.


	35. Aftermath

For a few days after the healing ritual, Loki did little other than sleep. Tony didn’t mind; he understood, or thought he understood—Loki had been through one trauma after another, and was probably running on empty by now. 

Tony missed him, though, missed having him nearby. He kept turning around to say something to him before remembering Loki was off snoozing somewhere, in the bedroom or on a couch, or... He kept wanting to touch him, smell him—not that he couldn’t. It just meant he had to find him first, and it was amazing how Loki could wad himself up into a ball and fit into unlikely places, places that he seemed to choose specifically in order not to be found. 

All part of the re-charging process, Tony supposed. He tried not to take it personally.

But, it wasn’t only that. Tony missed doing things they hadn’t even done yet. He wanted to take his trickster on long walks in the park, take him to the zoo. Take him to his fave restaurants, the ones where no one would recognize either of them, and no one would give a shit if they did. He wanted to take him to the really cool clubs, to see the best shows. He wanted to, you know, show Loki Tony Stark’s Manhattan. 

But Loki kept politely declining to go out. He also declined to see anyone who might come over, and Tony soon learned that Loki didn’t need magic to disappear.

Yeah, it felt like they’d just begun to have a normal life together, only to have a big old wet blanket drop down on them in the form of the remnants of Loki’s past bad behavior. But Tony knew they’d pick up where they’d left off, eventually. For now, he could totally see how Loki might need to just check out for a little while, and he resolved to be patient. He had plenty to do in his lab, and he had been a teeny bit neglectful of Stark Enterprises—wouldn’t hurt to catch up on some emails and return a few phone calls while he waited for his space alien mischief-god to get his head together.

But, a few days became a week, and a week became a month, and it felt like Loki’s naps were interrupted only by demands for food and an occasional viewing of The Beverly Hillbillies. 

It finally occurred to Tony that, maybe, he ought to be getting worried.

******

“You’re turning into a cat,” Tony observed one afternoon, having emerged from his lab to answer a summons for a snack and (snidely) the pleasure of his company. He carried a plate of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in one hand, and a large glass of milk in the other. 

Loki was luxuriating on a chaise lounge by a window, the sun warming his back as he lay with his head propped up on one hand. A book was open under the other, and he turned a page before absently asking, “What do you mean?” Tony proffered the sandwich plate, but Loki gave a languid wave at the coffee table, not bothering to look up. Tony frowned as he set down the snack as directed.

“All you’ve done lately is sleep and pester me to fill your food bowl. That’s okay, but just so you know? When you start demanding I dangle a string for you to bat at, that’s going too far.”

Now, Loki raised his eyes to meet Tony’s. “I’m pregnant. Therefore, I shall do exactly as I please for as long as possible, and, in your role as the cur who knocked me up, it’s your duty to feed and amuse me.” He eyed the sandwiches with an air of suspicion. “Which, so far, has not been your strong suit. But I long for a bit of intellectual stimulation beyond vapid TV shows and the lurid pulp fiction that passes for literature around here, and you’re all I’ve got.” 

“Intellectual stimulation, uh-huh. I’m kind of amazed you think I’m going to be able to help you with that.”

“Oh, I don’t think that at all. But, there’re all kinds of stimulation, and I’m not picky.” Loki winked and grinned teasingly. “Meow.”

“See, I knew it, you’re totally a cat.” A burst of affection came over Tony, and he made Loki scoot over. He sat down in the space afforded him and pushed up Loki’s shirt in order to rub his rounded belly. “Come on, Frisky. Purr for me.”

Loki closed his eyes, enjoying Tony’s touch. He arched his back, cat-like, and made a feline noise of satisfaction, which made Tony laugh. Loki then pulled himself into a sitting position. “For the most part, if this is a cat’s life, I’m all for it. Perhaps I’ll become one after the baby arrives. Yes, and I’ll leave you to deal with infant care, at least until the damned creature becomes interesting.”

“Oh, no you don’t. I’ll get Frigga to turn the baby into a kitten and it’ll follow you around, mewing like a bad-ass.”

A laugh turned into a huge yawn that overtook Loki’s entire face. “That’s not really her area, but you’re welcome to try.”

Tony regarded him for a moment, thinking how nice it had felt, rubbing the spot where his child dwelled under Loki’s skin, causing it to stretch tautly over a firm baby-mound. He couldn’t resist reaching over to cup the fullness of Loki’s tummy. “Wow, babe, you’re really getting big.” 

“Well, that’s to be expected, isn’t it?” Loki asked sourly. “Surely it’s unnecessary to remark upon it all the time. Hand me a sandwich.”

“It’s right there!” Tony protested, gesturing at the plate located two feet away from Loki. But, given the foul look he got, Tony handed over the sandwich. “You’re supposed to be getting exercise, you know. I guess reaching for food is a little too strenuous?” 

“I want to be pampered, and I expect you to indulge me, not just remind me of how misshapen I’ve become.” Loki wrangled himself around to lie on his back with his head in Tony’s lap, and took a bite of sandwich. A grudging look of approval came over him. “Well, this is surprisingly delicious. What did you call it again?”

“PB and J. Speaking of naming things, have you given any more thought to what Tony Jr.’s middle name should be?”

Loki sighed. “In the first place, I’m not calling my child by my mate’s name. It’s too confusing, plus it would only go toward inflating your already insufferable ego. Secondly, it could very well be a girl, and while Antonia is a lovely name, it’s almost inevitable that she’d end up being called ‘Toni’ with an ‘i,’ in which case, please refer back to reason number one.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Okay, fine, but other than that, name-wise? We’ve got zip, as in nada, and I’d rather we hash this out while the kid’s still just a bun in your oven, rather than letting his first memories be of you and me screaming over what goes on the birth certificate.”

“Birth certificate,” Loki sniffed, “Leave it to Midgard to insist upon a piece of paper to prove someone’s been born.”

“Yeah, yeah, we’re a lame planet. Now, back to the main point here, I think—”

“Don’t trouble yourself, I’ve already decided. Demetrius if it’s a boy, Seraphina if it’s a girl.”

This time, Tony’s eye-roll threatened to dislodge one or both eyeballs. “No fucking way.”

“I suppose you’ve come up with something better?”

“I have.” Tony held up his hands as if framing a picture. “Try these on for size: Frank if it’s a boy. Francine if it’s a girl.”

Loki looked as if someone had scraped fingernails down a blackboard. “Oh, by the Nine, Stark—could you possibly come up with a more pedestrian and unremarkable selection?”

“What? Those are good names, what’s wrong with ‘em?”

“This is the progeny of a god! A king! And, somewhat less interestingly, a super hero! You’d fate it to the nickname ‘Frankie?’ Or, _‘Frannie?’_ Ugh. Absolutely not.”

“Hey, the key to naming a kid is to come up with something that won’t get them beaten up in school. Frank’s a good, solid name. No beating up likely.”

“I should think being a blue-skinned half-breed would ensure a fair amount of beatings. The name is hardly going to improve his chances one way or the other.”

“Okay, obviously we need to think on this some more.”

“Later. I’m sleepy. I think I’ll have a nap after I eat.”

_Shit. More sleep? This was getting ridiculous._ “I thought you wanted ‘intellectual stimulation.’” Tony made air quotes and wiggled his eyebrows lasciviously. He said it to keep Loki awake and engaged, but he found himself getting hard. He and Loki hadn’t had a good round of hot sweaty monkey loving since the Jotunn contingency had left, and he was suddenly eager to take his boyfriend to bed.

Which wasn’t what Loki was expecting at all. It seemed to him that Tony had been positively reveling in having a little uninterrupted time to himself, both in his lab and in his office. Loki had been certain that, after the forced snack-bringing, he’d surely want to hurry back to whatever he’d been doing. But the nudge swelling against his side told him otherwise, and his eyes widened as it suddenly occurred to him that his idle flirting really must have led Tony down the garden path toward intimacy. There was a time when he might have taken pleasure in mischievously leaving his lover frustrated and bewildered after building up his expectations, but now... 

He managed to put a sensual tone in his voice. “Oh, yes. I just didn’t realize you could be pulled away from your blasted laboratory so easily.” He reached up and yanked Tony down for an upside-down kiss. “But how nice to know you’re not entirely oblivious to opportunity.”

“Hey, I don’t miss out on opportunities. How’d you think I got to be Iron Man?”

“Good luck and a vast inheritance?” Loki asked brightly.

“Believe what you want. I don’t care, as long as you make that cat sound again.”

“What am I, a performing ape?” 

Tony shrugged. “Performing kitty cat, maybe.” He slid an arm around Loki’s waist and hefted him so that he was left lying on his back as Tony stood up. He then bent down to kiss him. “You stay here, okay?”

“Where are you going?” Loki asked.

“Lube!” Tony said as he zipped off to their bedroom.

“Of course.” Loki gave a resigned sigh. 

“Feel free to go all Jotunn on me if you want!” Tony called, slamming a drawer shut.

“No, that’s all right. Have me as I am.” Loki wasn’t exactly in a sexy mood. But when Tony returned, he hastily put on as wicked a smile as he could muster, noting that his genius philanthropist was wearing a bathrobe and nothing else. He braced himself for the onslaught, and it came in fast. Tony knelt next to the chaise and gathered Loki in his arms for a deep kiss. He lovingly laved and nipped along as he bared Loki’s skin, and Loki made sure he stroked Tony’s hair, raked nails down his back, and squeezed his ass through the flannel in as welcoming a manner as possible when he parted his legs for Tony to prepare him. 

Before long, the god was lying underneath his lover, knees pressed high against Tony’s ribs, being cheerfully pounded into the upholstery. 

Which was fine.

Tony was annoyingly considerate, asking if Loki was okay, if this wouldn’t hurt the baby ( _Of course not, idiot,_ Loki thought), and if what he was doing felt good.

Which it did. 

It felt very nice, rather the way a hot shower feels good after a sweaty hike in the woods, or a lovely back rub feels good while you’re watching a dull stupid movie, but of course Loki knew that wasn’t the effect Tony was going for. So, he made a point of writhing around while moaning and keening and crying out with pleasure, yada yada yada, for the duration of Tony’s exertions. 

And soon, Tony came with a roar, and then collapsed happily on his back, drawing Loki in close. He lay there in utter satisfaction for several long moments before noticing that Loki hadn’t, well... 

“Wait a minute—holy shit! I didn’t make you come, did I, babe?” Tony asked with concern.

“Ah... Um, well, not exactly, but it’s fine! It was wonderful just the same. Exactly what I needed.” Loki hastily turned his face away, scratching an imaginary itch on his neck. _God of Lies, indeed._

“It’s not fine, I wanted to make you feel as good as you make me feel. Come’ere, I’ll suck you off, and—”

“No! I mean, no, that’s all right. This was absolutely perfect.” Loki fluidly sat up, pulled on his underwear and t-shirt, picked up the sleep pants that had become his usual attire (they didn’t squeeze his belly) and then gave Tony a genuinely affectionate kiss. “Actually, I think I’ll go lie down now. I really am a bit tired.” He smiled and turned to head to the bedroom, still graceful in spite of his burgeoning tummy.

Tony watched him leave, brow furrowed. Now, that was just weird. He wanted to run and grab him, pin him against the wall and ask him what the hell was going on in his pretty, devious little head. Because Loki, God of Mischief, didn’t have sex and fake orgasms just to make somebody feel good. Well, Tony didn’t think he did, anyway. Or maybe he did it all the time, and was just better at it when he wasn’t pregnant. 

But Tony heard the bedroom door shut, and he decided he’d let him get Nap Number Three out of the way before he confronted him. He got up, dressed, and went back down to his lab, his face creased in puzzlement as he stepped into the elevator.


	36. Loki the Pleasant

_Several days later…_

Pepper Potts sat at her office desk, staring at the tidy stack of papers lying in front of her. It was only 9:30 AM and she’d already plowed through a mountain of written material. This was what was left—contracts, all contracts, all requiring Tony Stark’s signature. 

Which wasn’t normally a problem. Pepper had long ago perfected the art of forging Tony’s signature, to the point she didn’t even need to look at the original source to ensure accuracy. But these were all oddball side projects that Tony never mentioned to her, or if he had, she hadn’t bothered to listen carefully enough to know what the status of the work looked like. Maybe Tony wanted to continue, maybe he didn’t. Either way, there was money involved, and Pepper wouldn’t presume to guess what Tony wanted to do about them.

And, he’d been studiously ignoring her phone calls, emails, and texts. So, she did what she’d done umpteen times before—she grabbed her brief case, stuffed the papers into it, and headed for Stark Tower.

*****

When she arrived, JARVIS greeted her. “I’ll let Mr. Stark know you’re here, Miss Potts.”

“No,” Pepper said firmly. “I don’t want to give him a chance to sneak off. Just tell me where he is—I’ll announce myself.”

“Yes, ma’am. He’s in his office at the moment.”

“Thanks, J.”

Pepper made her way to Tony’s office, noting as she approached that the door was wide open. _Good._ She moved stealthily, hoping to catch him playing Tetris or watching a movie on his tablet, all the better to heighten the guilt effect with, but he wasn’t at his desk or on the couch. She tentatively took a step inside and saw him standing by the window, looking pensive.

_Pensive._ Tony could be a lot of things, but pensive wasn’t one of them. If he was mulling over a problem, his mouth was going a mile a minute, as he was totally an external processor. If he was angry? Same thing. If he was sad? Well, Pepper never knew Tony to be sad, exactly, but when he was, he was in his lab, adding a subwoofer to one of his suits, or trying to invent a robot that would make hand-tossed pizza on demand. But this... Pepper wasn’t sure what this was. 

“Hello?” she asked.

Tony didn’t react immediately. He continued to stare out into the city for a long moment before turning to greet her. “Hey, Pep. Didn’t know you were coming by.”

“Well, how would you, you haven’t answered any of my...” She quickly dropped the chiding tone. It clearly wasn’t necessary—Tony didn’t look to be in a work-evading mood at the moment. Instead, she reached into her case and pulled out the sheaf of papers. “I have some stuff to go over with you.”

Tony raised an eyebrow and gave a wry grin. “Really? Now? It’s only 10:00 AM. You usually let me squander my day until well into the afternoon.”

Pepper sighed. “Yes, and I’ve been going easy on you for way too long. It’s about time you got back into running your own company—a little bit, at least.” She waited for Tony to smart off or attempt to distract her, something, but he just nodded.

“Okay.” He went to sit on the couch and beckoned to her. “Lay it on me.”

Pepper joined him and set the stack on the coffee table before fixing him with a critical look. “Okay, this is just weird. What’s wrong with you?”

“Huh?” 

“You’re acting like they just shut down the power grid. What’s the matter, what happened?”

Tony shrugged. “Nothing. I’m fine.”

“Sorry, not buying it. Come on, tell me.”

Tony avoided her eyes and reached for one of the papers. “I’m fine, I promise. What’s this? Oh, yeah, this guy’s a crook, I’m not signing that. Now, this one—”

_“Tony.”_ Pepper had been running through a list of possible reasons for Tony’s morose disposition and had eliminated every known factor that tended to cause him dissatisfaction. Now, she was moving on to the unknowns. What was different? What had taken place in Tony’s life that she hadn’t been party to? 

Oh. Yeah. 

“It’s Loki, isn’t it?” she asked. “You two have a fight?”

Tony flinched. “Nope.”

A worried expression crossed Pepper’s face. “Oh, God. Is the baby okay? I mean, I still don’t quite believe there _is_ a baby, but is it all right?”

Tony smiled slightly. “The baby’s fine, so far as I know.”

“Well, what’s wrong then?”

“Nothing, everything’s great.”

“No, it’s not. I’ve never seen you like this. Something’s on your mind, and it’s not like you not to bitch about it or hole up in your lab applying algorithms to it.” She put a hand on his shoulder and her voice softened. “Tony, you can talk to me, you know that.”

Tony absently patted her hand. “Yeah, I know. It’s just... I don’t know what’s wrong, exactly.”

“Give me a ballpark.”

He looked rueful for a moment before answering. “Okay, it’s Loki.”

“I knew it! Now we’re getting somewhere. What’d he do? Is he relapsing? Cooking up some kind of power play to take over the Garment District and make everyone wear green and gold on the runway this year?”

An appreciative chuckle escaped from Tony and he seemed to relax a bit. “No, nothing tragic like that, thankfully. It’s just...” He shrugged again.

“Is he pining for Asgard? Plotting revenge against poor Thor? Oh, I know, it’s pregnancy related—he wants interplanetary pickles and ice cream and you can’t figure out how to get home delivery from Jotenheim, am I right?”

“Ha, I wish it was that simple. No, no. Loki’s not causing any trouble. He’s fine.” Tony sniffed reflectively. “He’s great. In fact, he’s been... pleasant.”

Pepper blinked. “Pleasant?” 

“Yeah.”

A cold shiver of unease went through her. “Pleasant. Loki’s being... pleasant.”

Tony gave a nod. “You see the problem.”

“Mm.”

“I mean, Loki at his worst... Well, you just have to look at the footage from the attack on New York to get a feel for that. But, Pep—when Loki’s at his best, he’s... amazing. Wickedly charming, funny as hell, sexy as shit—”

“Whoa! TMI, Tony.”

“Okay, but he’s all that, and more.” Tony stood up and began pacing as he warmed to the subject. “He’s _kind._ He cares about stuff, including, like, well, _me._ He’s vulnerable, he’s sly, he’s brilliant, he’s a whole bunch of fantastic things, but one thing he’s not? Is pleasant. Never. He doesn’t have a wishy-washy bone in his skinny little body. If he’s happy, he’s on top of the world, if he’s down, he’s a black cloud, and if he’s mad, he’s a damn minefield, but he’s always one or the other, and this—this calm, cheery, accommodating bullshit? It’s freaking me out.” Tony’s lips twisted into a worried grimace. “I think he’s planning to leave me after the baby comes.”

“Oh, Tony, come on. I can’t say I know him real well, but it doesn’t take much to see that he loves you. Why would he leave?”

“I don’t know. Some fucked-up idea that the kid and I’d be better off without him, maybe?”

“I don’t believe he believes that, and anyway, why would he be so, uh, pleasant if he was planning to leave you?”

“To throw me off the scent! He’s fiendishly clever, remember? If he lulls me into a false sense of security, he can sneak off into the wacko-sphere while I’m busy with the baby, and I’ll never see him again.” Tony’s voice had taken on an aggrieved tone. “I can’t lose him, Pep. What am I going to do?”

Pepper gave him a look of infinite patience. “Well—this is just a crazy idea, but have you tried talking to him?” 

“Yes!” Tony ran a hand through his hair, leaving it sticking up crazily. “Yes, I’ve asked him what’s wrong. ‘Nothing,’ he says, ‘Thanks for asking,’ he says. And, you know what else? He doesn’t demand things anymore. It’s all ‘Please,’ and ‘When you have a moment,’ and ‘If you wouldn’t mind.’ And then, he’s pathetically grateful—‘I’m so sorry to have bothered you,’ and ‘I do so appreciate your kindness,’ and ‘I hate being such a burden.” Tony gave an unfocused stare at the floor. “I mean, shit. I didn’t even know he could string words like that together in a sentence.”

A puzzled frown came over Pepper. “That really _is_ weird.”

“I know! And, it’s not just that—all he does is sleep.”

“Wow. Really?”

“Oh, he slinks around, avoiding me when he can. He reads, watches bad TV.” Tony threw his hands in the air. “I can’t figure it out! He’s not angry, he’s not depressed, he’s just... pleasant. And, I _hate_ it.”

“I’m going to go talk to him,” Pepper said briskly as she stood up. 

“Huh? What good’ll that do? I don’t mean to hurt your feelings, but I don’t think you’re exactly his favorite person.”

“I know. So, we’ll see if he keeps up the pleasant act around someone he doesn’t give a damn about, or if he goes back to being his usual snarky self. Maybe that’ll give us an idea of what’s going on.” 

Tony pursed his lips, nodding. “Hm. Well, okay. He was in the den, last time I saw him. Asleep. So, you know—don’t startle him or anything.”

“I’ll be careful.”

******

Pepper approached the door of the den with the same stealth she’d used at Tony’s office. She saw Loki sitting cross-legged on the couch, his fingers entwined, hands cradling his swollen belly. He was intently watching television.

Pepper paused to take a deep breath before knocking firmly on the door frame. “Hello?”

Loki looked up, and she saw a flash of displeasure cross his face. But, it was quickly replaced by a neutral, blank-eyed smile. “Ah, Miss Potts. How lovely to see you. Please, come in. What can I do for you?”

“Well... I haven’t seen you for a while, and I just wondered how you were doing.” She left the safety of the doorway and ventured in closer. “How are you? What have you been up to lately?”

Loki glanced down at his stomach. “Gestating, mostly.”

“And, watching TV?”

Loki chuckled. “I’m afraid so. It started out as merely sordid curiosity, but it’s become something of a vice. I may have to join a 12-step program once the baby’s born.”

Pepper grinned, content to share a bit of good humor with the sorcerer before pressing further. “I imagine you won’t have a lot of time for it then,” she said casually.

“No, I suppose not.” Loki glanced at her, and then gestured at the other end of the couch. “Please, sit down.” Pepper took a seat and Loki turned back to the television. After a moment, he drew in a quick breath and gave a slight start, covering the side of his tummy with his hand. “Norns...” he said under his breath.

“What’s wrong?” Pepper asked. She was surprised to realize she was actually concerned.

Loki grinned sheepishly. “Nothing. This baby... He’s very active these days, and seems to take particular pleasure in bashing me in the ribs. Ow...” He shifted uncomfortably and Pepper leaned in and saw a little ripple run along under the rather snug t-shirt he was wearing.

“Oh, wow. I can see him moving!”

“Yes, he’s making quite an impression on my insides.” He looked at Pepper’s genuinely interested expression and asked, “Would you like to touch? Don’t feel obligated. But, Tony seems to find it intriguing, so... feel free.”

Pepper smiled uncertainly, and gently laid her palm over the area. Instantly, a very definite kick met her hand, and she gasped in delight. “Wow! That was really strong.”

“How strange. It seems to be responding to you.” Loki smiled wryly. “Already so sociable, just like Tony. I suppose that’s a good thing.” 

Pepper leaned back, not sure what to say to that, and saw a mildly pained look cross Loki’s face. He began rubbing a hand in circles over his belly.

“Everything all right?” Pepper asked, indicating his motion.

“Hm? Oh, yes. Skin’s a little dry, that’s all. It feels tight.”

“You should tell Tony to get you some honey butter cream. A friend of mine used it to get rid of stretch marks, and she loved how it made her skin feel.”

Loki was now looking at her quizzically. “I’m sure Tony will get right on that.”

Pepper made a “pshaw” noise. “Right. Never mind, I’ll order some for you and have it delivered.”

A slightly aghast look came over Loki. “You don’t have to do that.”

“It’s no problem, I want to. I know we didn’t get off to the greatest start, but, well... I’d be happy to do something for you now, if I can.”

Loki was clearly about to protest, but he almost physically choked back the words. “Ah... Well, thank you. That would be very kind.”

_Pleasant. Shit, Tony was right, he’s being pleasant._ It really was disconcerting, but Pepper plowed ahead. “Tony tells me you’ve been sleeping a lot.”

Loki raised an eyebrow. “I suppose I have. Not so unusual though, is it? Expectant people need a lot of sleep.”

“Uh-huh. But, I think he’s kind of worried. Are you sure you’re feeling all right?”

“Yes, of course.” The displeased look crossed Loki’s face again, but again, it quickly faded.

“Well, that’s good. But, still, I think you should mention being so fatigued to your doctor. You probably need vitamins or something.”

An actual frown came over Loki, reminding Pepper of the Loki of their long-ago pre-dinner conversation. _Good. Maybe he’ll crack and we can get to the bottom of this,_ she thought. 

But, again Loki’s expression evened out and he smiled ruefully. “I don’t have a doctor.”

A little shockwave of disbelief went through Pepper, followed by a grim resolution to shake Tony Stark like a rag doll. _“What?_ Are you serious? You’re what, six months along? You need a check-up! An ultrasound! What if you have gestational diabetes, or preeclampsia? And, don’t you want to know if it’s a boy or a girl?”

Now, Loki appeared frankly horrified. “Miss Potts, I can’t very well visit a Midgardian physician—it would draw far too much attention. And, I have no idea what those wretched afflictions are that you mentioned, but I seriously doubt that I’m subject to them. And, as for whether it’s a boy or a girl, if it bears sufficient Jotunn blood, it will be both. Otherwise, I’d just as soon be surprised. So... No doctor, no. But, thank you for your concern.”

Loki had kept his voice measured and appeared perfectly calm, although Pepper noticed he was now clenching his fists tightly. She forced herself to refocus on her original mission to get Loki to drop the meek act and tell her what was going on with him. It sounded like he was getting close to the edge. Maybe he just needed a little nudge... She took a moment to appear to give Loki’s words due consideration, and then ran a hand through her hair in a carefree manner. 

“Well, I see your point, and I’m sure you’re right. But I’m not at all comfortable with the idea of you going full term without at least doing some basic medical screening.” She chewed her lip thoughtfully, brightening when an actual solution came to her. “I know—I’ll get Bruce to come over here and have a look at you. He did quite a bit of pre-natal care while he was in India.”

Pepper took care to observe Loki’s reaction, but all she got out of him was a severe tightening of the lips. And, after only a couple of seconds, even that was gone, and Loki smiled benignly at her.

“That’s a lovely thought, but I’m perfectly fine, and I’m sure Dr. Banner has better things to do. Please don’t trouble yourself.”

“Oh, it’s no trouble.” Pepper got out her phone and punched Bruce’s speed dial number. “I’ll have him over here in just a few.” She smiled cheerfully, and Loki managed to keep his lips clamped together in a rictus smile.

But, inside he was boiling.

******

Bruce arrived in short order with his medical bag in hand and Pepper took him aside along with Tony, and together they gave him a run-down on the situation—Loki’s apparent exhaustion, his withdrawal from the outside world, his oddly genial demeanor, and his tight control over his emotions.

“It’s all just weird,” Pepper said in summation. “And, on top of all that, he hasn’t even seen a doctor about the pregnancy.” She shot a disgusted look at Tony, and he shrugged helplessly.

“I tried to get him to see someone, but he flat out refused, and it didn’t seem worth a fight. I mean, he seems healthy enough—physically.”

Bruce was mulling over the information, but at Tony’s remark, he looked up. “Yeah, but a lot of pre-natal natal conditions are asymptomatic until it’s too late. There are things that can harm both the, uh, mom and the fetus which are pretty easy to correct if you catch them in time. Of course, I have no idea what sort of physiology we’re dealing with here. But I’ll be glad to take a look at him.”

Tony emitted a low groan. “Which would be fine, if you can get the Knocked-Up One to stay put long enough to see him. Lately, he has a way of disappearing when threatened with guests. What are you planning to do, anyway?” he asked Bruce.

“Draw some blood, collect urine. Check the baby’s position, get an idea of its size. That’ll involve touching his belly, so that might be tricky... I doubt he’s going to let me near his actual body.” Bruce wrinkled his brow. 

“You’re going to have to talk him into it, Tony,” Pepper observed.

Tony sneered. “Yeah, right, that should be easy.”

Bruce scrubbed at his jaw thoughtfully for a moment. “Listen, just convince him to let me take the samples. I think if I have a chance to talk to him, I can get him to trust me, once we’re past those hurdles.”

“Trust you? Really? After you put a Loki-shaped indentation in my concrete floor?” 

Bruce shrugged. “We got along fine at your dinner party, remember? ”

A doubtful look lingered on Tony’s face, but he nodded. “Okay. I’ll go talk to him. Maybe he’ll throw a vase at me or something, which would be great—if I don’t get a dose of the old Loki soon, I think I’ll blow a gasket.” He strode out of the room, leaving Pepper and Bruce to stare uncertainly at each other. 

*****  
Loki was taking deep, calming breaths. When Tony came into the room, he closed his eyes and tried to empty his mind. Things had been going so well, he was determined not to ruin them now. 

“Babe?” Tony asked softly.

“Hello, Tony.” Loki offered a serene smile. “Has Miss Potts left yet?”

“Uh, no. And... Banner’s here.” Tony sat next to Loki and slid an arm around him. “He came to do some pre-natal tests. Is that okay?”

_It most certainly is not,_ Loki’s brain screamed. But, he simply shrugged. “I’d prefer not. There’s no point. I told you, I’m not susceptible to Midgardian illnesses.”

“No, not so far. But, you’ve never been pregnant before, right?”

“No, but—”

“So, you don’t know for sure. Listen, it’s no big deal. He’s going to have you pee in a cup, and take a little blood, that’s all.”

The expression on Loki’s face would have been comical if Tony hadn’t been so tense. But, when Loki spoke, his voice was low and controlled. “I see. Blood letting.” Loki nodded stoically, his lips in a twist. “I had no idea Midgardian medical practices were so advanced.”

“It’s not bloodletting, it’s just a little stick with a needle. Then Bruce can take the samples to a lab and have them analyzed. Just to rule things out.” Tony drew Loki close and hugged him. “Baby, I don’t want anything to happen to you, and if these tests can catch a problem before you get sick or—”

“Whatever you think best, Tony.” Loki seemed to withdraw into an invisible shell and Tony held him tightly for a long time, wishing he could look into Loki’s mind and see whatever the hell it was that was causing him to be so unnaturally passive. But, he decided to take what he could get at this point, and gently released him.

“Okay. I’ll have Bruce come in. Now, don’t worry. He knows what he’s doing, and the green guy isn’t going to drop in. It’ll be fine.” He kissed the top of Loki’s head and went to fetch Bruce.


	37. Some Simple Tests

Bruce stood at the door of the den, running through possible scenarios. He felt sure Loki was no longer a threat. He also thought the two of them had passed some sort of milestone at Tony’s dinner party, allowing them to be civil—even friendly—with each other. But, that was a far cry from being on such good terms that Loki would allow him to give him a medical exam, even a non-invasive one. 

He had to establish trust. And, maybe if he went slowly and behaved in a respectful manner, he could do so. So, he tapped on the doorframe before poking his head in and saying, “Uh, Loki?” in an unassuming voice. He stayed put and waited to be acknowledged, braced for whatever rebuff Loki might choose to hurl at him.

But, all he got was a soft, Asgardian-accented, “Hello, Dr. Banner.” 

Bruce raised an eyebrow. “Hi there. Mind if I come in?”

Loki sighed. He was doing his best to be honest without being confrontational, but it was difficult. He thought a moment before answering. “I’d rather you didn’t. But, Tony seems to think it’s important I have these tests, so I won’t resist.”

Bruce came in and placed his medical bag on the coffee table. Loki looked up, and Bruce met his eyes with a kindly smile. “‘Resist?’ Wow. Sounds like you’re expecting something a lot more dramatic than a pre-natal checkup. May I sit down?”

Loki gestured toward a nearby chair. “Please do. It’s just that... I don’t know what to expect.”

“I understand. But, I promise, it’s all pretty easy, and I’ll be sure to explain as we go along. For starters, I need to collect a urine sample.” Bruce took a plastic cup with a screw-on lid out of his case and offered it to Loki.

Loki frowned. “Is this what Tony was referring to when he said I’d have to pee in a cup?”

“Um, yeah.”

Loki’s frown deepened. “And what, precisely, will you glean from this?”

“A lot, actually. I’ll screen for excess sugar, which could be a sign of gestational diabetes. Also, for bacteria and an elevated enzyme level that could indicate an infection of some sort. And, I’ll check to make sure your nutrition has been adequate so far.”

A blank expression had come over Loki, and he shrugged. “All right.” He took the cup and headed to the bathroom. In the meantime, Bruce got ready to draw blood.

When Loki returned, Bruce had him place the cup in a plastic bag. He then took it, sealed it and put it in his medical kit. He cleaned his hands with an antiseptic wipe and then pulled on latex gloves. “Thank you. Now, I need to get some blood from your arm.” He held up a hypodermic and let Loki take a look at it. “I’m not going to lie—it’ll probably sting when I stick you, and it may burn a little while I draw the blood. But, it’ll only be for a few seconds, okay?”

Loki just maintained his blank expression, and that worried Bruce. All he needed was for Loki to freak out at the needle stick and end up unleashing the Hulk. He spoke as soothingly as he could. “Some people don’t even feel it, while others are very sensitive. But, I’ll be super careful, and again, it only lasts for a couple of moments. Uh—do you have any questions?”

“What does the blood tell you?”

“Well, let’s see—we’ll find out what your blood type is, which could be important if something, you know, went wrong at the birth. Also, it’ll tell if your iron level is low, which might mean you have anemia—and that’s important, because that could be what’s behind your fatigue. We’ll also screen for various diseases—”

“Which I’m not susceptible to.”

“Yeah, but there are some genetic conditions that could affect the baby’s health, and since the, um, other parent is human, well, it’d be good to rule those out.”

A long pause left Bruce wondering if Loki was finally going to raise an objection, but eventually he nodded and said, “Very well, go ahead,” with a resigned note in his voice. He almost sounded beaten down, but as Bruce prepared the needle, Loki seemed to perk up, intently following Bruce’s movements. 

As promised, Bruce explained to Loki the purpose of each step, starting with applying a tourniquet and having him straighten his arm and pump his fist. Bruce gave him a pillow and gripped his arm above the elbow for support. He found a vein easily, swiped the area with antiseptic, and waited until it dried before saying, “Now, just relax, don’t tense up,” before sticking him. 

The only discernible hint that it caused Loki any pain was when he closed his eyes and took a breath, but then he quickly went back to closely observing Bruce’s actions. He watched as Bruce removed the needle filled with thick, dark red liquid and capped it before putting it in a sterile receptacle in his bag. Bruce again swiped Loki’s arm with antiseptic, placed a cotton ball on the puncture, and asked Loki to hold it there while he got a piece of tape to secure it with.

Once he was finished, he smiled at Loki. “That’s it, that’s all there is to it. Not so bad, huh?”

“No.” Loki gave him a wicked grin. “I’ve had worse.” 

“Uh... yeah.” For a moment, Bruce definitely saw “normal” Loki in a flash of those green eyes, but the blank expression came back almost immediately. Bruce cleared his throat. “Mind if I check your ankles?”

Loki’s eyes narrowed. “My ankles? What in the Norns do they have to do with anything?”

“Just checking for swelling, it’s a usual part of the exam. It’ll only take a minute.”

Loki rolled his eyes, but gestured accommodatingly toward his feet. “Fine.”

Bruce knelt and took one slender ankle in hand, then the other, squeezing in a practiced way. “Good. Let me see your hands.”

Loki offered them and Bruce did a similar assessment. “Great, you’re doing really well.”

“Are we done?” Loki asked.

“Well, there’s one more thing I’d like to do, and it won’t hurt at all. But, you might think it’s kind of... intimate.”

“You don’t intend to poke around in my private places, do you? Because, that’s complicated.”

“No, no. I’d just like to get an idea of the baby’s size and position. I’ll need to put my hands on your stomach and do a little probing. Is that okay?”

Another long-suffering sigh from Loki. “I suppose.” 

“Okay. How about you lie back and relax? And, uh—pull up your shirt, please.” Loki stretched out on the couch, and Bruce pulled the chair closer. He fished a stethoscope out of his bag and warmed it in his hand for a moment. Then, he pressed it to Loki’s stomach and listened carefully. He moved it to other points and did the same, frowning. Now, Loki was looking at him with some concern. 

“What? Is something wrong?” 

Bruce looked at him in surprise. “Oh, no, not at all. It’s just, I’m not the best at finding the fetal heartbeat, it always takes me a while. But it’s there, good and strong.” He smiled reassuringly. “No worries. Okay if I continue?” Loki nodded.

He then stood over him, pressing fingers in key spots on Loki’s belly, measuring and probing, and then he jotted down some notes. After that, he sat back and gave Loki a pleased nod. “All right, we’re done, and good news—everything appears perfectly normal.”

Loki pulled down his shirt and sat up. “According to human standards, you mean?”

“Well, yeah.”

“I’m sure Tony will be pleased.”

Bruce put away his exam equipment before giving Loki a piercing look. “Aren’t you?”

“Of course. It’s just that, given my true heritage, I don’t know that your tests are very meaningful.”

“Right. But, at least you can be sure we did everything we could to insure the baby’s well-being. And yours.”

Now, Loki was staring interestedly at him. “Why do you care?” It wasn’t a mean-spirited question; in fact, Loki just sounded bewildered.

There were a few bits of trash scattered on the coffee table, and Bruce gathered them up in a wad as he considered the question. At last, he shrugged. “Well... There’s an innocent baby’s life and health at stake. I’d do what I could for anyone in a similar situation. And, Tony’s my friend. You’re important to him, so, in that way, you’re important to me. And...” Bruce looked up and grinned. “To be honest, as a scientist? This whole thing is fascinating to me. I can’t wait to get to the lab. Do you know how disappointed I’m going to be if your blood work comes back just... normal?”

Loki gave a little smile. “I feel certain it won’t.”

“Well, we’ll see.”

Bruce made a show of checking his medical bag and zipping it up with great ceremony, buying himself a little time. They’d cleared one hurdle; now, on to the next, and this one was going to be much, much trickier.

“Okay, then. Well, I guess I’ll be on my way. But, Loki—there’s one thing I did want to mention.”  

“Oh? What is it?”

“Physically, you do appear to be just fine. But—and of course, I don’t know you very well—but, you do seem... kind of subdued.”

“Subdued.”

Bruce took a deep breath. “Yeah. Tony’s super concerned. You’re sleeping so much, and you... You’re not acting like yourself. Tony’s really worried about whatever it is that you’re going through. In fact... He’s afraid you’re going to leave him—you know, after the baby comes. And, he blames himself.”

“Oh, dear.” Loki tipped his head back to stare at the ceiling. “Tony’s a fool,” he said softly. He returned his gaze to Bruce. “A dear, sweet, brilliant fool. I would never leave him by choice, surely he knows that.”

“Mm, well, I imagine it’s kind of hard for him to believe that when you’re not talking to him.” Bruce spoke in a casual, off-hand manner.

A sly grin came over Loki. “Ah. I see. He asked you to talk to me.”

“Kind of,” Bruce answered sheepishly. “I know you don’t trust me, and I tried to tell him that, but he’s getting desperate.” He spread his hands apart in a helpless gesture. “I’m sorry.”

Now, a worried expression crossed Loki’s face. “Desperate? What do you mean?”

Bruce met his eyes, staring into them as if trying to forge a spiritual connection between them on the spot. “You’re breaking his heart.”

“What?” Loki regarded him for a long moment. “How?”

“He thinks you’ve lost faith in him. He only wants to protect you, to care for you. And, you seem to have turned away from him.” Bruce let that sink in and then added, “You’re killing him, man. He doesn’t know what to do to fix things.”

“But, I’ve done nothing wrong! I’ve only been nice to him, why would he think—”

“He knows you too well, Loki. He knows this isn’t you. He wants you back, the way you were. That’s who he loves, that’s who he needs.” Bruce shrugged. “He just doesn’t understand what’s going on with you, and you’re not communicating with him. I’m sure you can see how that would worry him.”

The cool facade Loki had been showing appeared to crack. He shook his head emphatically. “But, there’s nothing I can say to Tony that he’d believe!”

A spark went through Bruce. This was good, it sounded like Loki might be giving him an in, and he had to be careful not to scare him off. He continued in his casual tone. “Wow—that sounds ominous.”

“You have no idea.”

“So, tell me.” Bruce felt as if he were on a tightrope. If he was too intense, Loki might turn inward again. If he was too detached, the god might lose the impetus to open up to him. Bruce leaned forward, elbows on his knees, his hands clasped together. “You know, there’s not much I wouldn’t believe. Once you’ve turned into a big green rage monster, the line between reality and the fantastic becomes pretty well blurred.”

Loki ran a hand through his hair, clearly giving Bruce’s words his undivided attention. He nodded thoughtfully. “Hmm. I suppose that’s true. I forget how different you are from other mortals.”

“Yeah. So—”

“I’m being punished.”

The words hung in the air, and when Bruce lifted his gaze from the floor to Loki’s eyes, he got a glimpse of something wild and anguished in them, something that could be fear, that could be madness... Bruce wasn’t sure, but it sent a chill through him just the same. “Punished? You mean, right now?”

“Not exactly. Always. I’m... always being punished.” Loki bit his lip, averting his eyes to somewhere in the room.

“Well, Loki, that doesn’t sound right. I mean, you committed some crimes, and you were punished for them, but now... That’s over.”

Disturbingly, Loki laughed. “This isn’t about that. Not really.” He turned and leaned in toward Bruce, like a child about to tell a secret. “You see, Doctor, I’m evil. Just... evil. I shouldn’t even be here.”

“Here... on Earth?”

Loki shook his head, keeping his eyes locked on Bruce’s. “Anywhere. I belong nowhere. I’m just wrong, have been from the moment of my birth.” A knowing sneer crossed his lips. “Dear Odin Allfather fucked things up—the creature who sired me had it right. When Laufey left me to die as an infant, he was doing the realms a favor. Unfortunately, he was too much of a coward to slay me with his own hand. And, stupid Odin swooped in to save me for his own selfish purposes, not knowing what the hell he was doing. And, thus it’s been ever since.” He looked away. “I’m to suffer until I die, and probably forever after that. Punishment for my nature, for having the temerity to defy the fate the Norns intended.”

Bruce spoke gently. “Loki, I don’t understand. Tony loves you, you’re going to have a baby together. Is that punishment?”

“No.” A bitter flame flared in his eyes. “You have to have something you want in order for it to hurt when it’s taken from you. Don’t you see? I was allowed this little bit of heaven, this glimpse of love and care and acceptance, so I could be made to suffer all the more greatly when it’s gone.”

Bruce was busy processing Loki’s manner, the intensity of his speech pattern, the way he was trembling. Whatever brought about this tale, Loki clearly believed every word he was saying. “Okay. But, why... Why have you kept yourself so apart from Tony? How does that help?”

“The evil inside me is just waiting to break out. I learned that after the healing ritual, when I barely contained the urge to reclaim the power of the Tesseract for myself. Because, wouldn’t that be the best? To have me destroy what I love the most, myself?” He gave a grim laugh and a hard edge came to his voice. “The Norns would delight in that more than anything. But, I won’t give it to them. I’ll stay away from Tony as much as possible, and I’ll do whatever he wants when I can’t, so as not to cause trouble. Because who knows what might set disaster into motion?” Now, tears were glinting in Loki’s eyes. “I’m just trying to make it through the pregnancy, Doctor. Then, I’ll leave, yes. But only to protect Tony and the child. Because, maybe, if I sacrifice myself, they’ll be left alone. Maybe... the world will be left alone.” At that, he brightened a little, a tiny hopeful smile slipping in, and Bruce remembered seeing war victims with that look in their eyes.

“Okay. I understand now, that all makes perfect sense.” _Keep him talking. Connect, if you can._ Bruce dared to put a hand on Loki’s shoulder and when he wasn’t rebuffed, he squeezed gently. “I can see that you’re doing the right thing, but it must be really hard, handling all this alone. I think you should tell Tony. He needs to know, doesn’t he?” _Was that okay? Did I just screw up?_ Bruce held his breath, waiting for Loki’s reaction.

But, Loki just nodded absently, studying the floor and tapping fingers against his lips. “Yes, yes, he does. But, I can’t do it. I can’t stand to see the disappointment in his eyes. He was so sure I was... rehabilitated. Ha. If he only knew the depths of my monstrosity...” He looked up suddenly. “You tell him, Dr. Banner. It’ll be better coming from you, I’m sure of it.” A look of relief came over him. “You can explain it and make him understand, make him see that there’s nothing he—or anyone—can do. He won’t blame himself, then. Yes. That’s good, you tell him. You... you tell him.”

“I will. I’ll go right now.” Bruce patted his arm. “Maybe you should go lie down for a while. Give Tony a chance to absorb everything.”

“All right.” Loki took a deep breath, seemingly feeling better for having unburdened himself. He stood up, stretching backward with his hands on the small of his back. “I know this will be difficult. I’ll be in our bedroom, should Tony wish to see me afterwards.”

“Great.”

Loki turned to leave, but then turned back. “Oh, and, Doctor?”

“Yes?”

“Please tell him I love him. Make sure he understands that, will you?”

“Of course.”

“Thank you.” Loki gave him a grateful smile and slipped out the door.


	38. Loki Takes His Meds

Tony sat slumped on the office couch, flipping through the contracts Pepper had brought for him to sign. The words were running together in a blob of legalese, and he’d quit trying to read them, but he wouldn’t put them down. He was grateful to have something to do with his hands. 

Pepper watched him, wishing he would talk to her, maybe tell her how he was feeling. She knew that wasn’t likely. Tony wasn’t a touchy-feely kind of guy, and he never seemed to take comfort in sharing his troubles. Of course, it wasn’t really necessary; she had a pretty good idea what was going through his mind at the moment. But she would have liked the chance to say, “It’ll be all right” just the same.

Not that it mattered. They were both too busy listening for sounds from the den to talk. All they could detect was an occasional murmur of conversation—until a door opened, causing them both to jerk upright. Footsteps faded down the hall, and Tony realized just how tautly he’d been holding himself as he waited for Bruce and Loki’s meeting to be over.

He strode to the door in time to see Loki disappear into their bedroom. He waited until Bruce came out of the den, medical bag in hand, and he felt tension grip him again, because Bruce certainly didn’t look as if he’d just had a breezy tea-time conversation with the God of Mischief.

But, he gave Tony a small smile and nod as he entered the office. “Hey.”

“Yeah, hey, so what’s going on?” Tony blurted.

Pepper came to stand beside Tony, sounding equally impatient. “Yeah, Bruce. You were in there a long time, is everything okay? Did he say anything?” 

“Okay, okay, just give me a second. Kind of a lot to process.” Bruce put down his bag and took a seat. “First, I want you to know he was very cooperative about the tests. And, from what I can tell, everything’s fine as far as the baby’s concerned. It seems to be positioned properly, and is a healthy size, so that’s great. I’ll run by the lab as soon as I leave here, and I’ll let you know the test results as soon as possible.”

Bruce swiped an arm over his eyes and took a deep, calming breath before leaning back and ruefully meeting Tony’s gaze. “Now for the hard part.” Bruce slowly went through each point he’d taken from his talk with Loki, watching as Tony’s brow drew tighter and tighter with each word. When he explained Loki’s plan to give birth and then leave, most likely with the intention of somehow committing suicide, he thought Tony was going to throw up. He hastily moved to sit next to him, wrapping an arm around his friend’s shoulders and holding him close as Tony’s body shuddered with repressed sobs.

When Tony recovered enough to be able to listen, Bruce continued. “Look, man, I’m not a psychiatrist. I have no idea what label to give to what’s troubling Loki, but I’d guess it’s some sort of severe anxiety disorder combined with depression, maybe PTSD and paranoia as well. And, I have no idea where to start trying to help him.”

“Do you think it’s the pregnancy?” Pepper asked uncertainly.

“I’m sure that’s exacerbating everything. Also, he mentioned the healing ritual and the Tesseract—I wasn’t sure what that was all about, but it might have been the triggering event that sort of knocked him off his feet.”

“Well, maybe everything will be all right after the baby comes.” 

“Doubtful. In fact, he could just as easily fall into postpartum depression, which could be dangerous for, well, everyone.”

At that, Tony pulled away. He stood up and began pacing. “Doesn’t matter. He can’t go on like this for three more months, and neither can I. We have to help him _now._ What can we do?”

Bruce shrugged, shaking his head. “I don’t know, Tony. If he was just a, you know, regular person, I’d haul his ass to a professional ASAP. But, who the hell’s ever had training in dealing with a mentally disturbed god?”

“I’m going to talk to him,” Tony said, willing his voice not to shake.

“Okay. But, don’t negate what he tells you. It won’t help, and it’ll just make him think he was right about you not believing him.”

“Right. Got it,” Tony said over his shoulder as he headed out the door.

******

Tony gave the bedroom door a quick knock before opening it. “Hey, kiddo,” he said as he stepped into the room.

Loki was sitting on the bed, scrunched up with his arms clasped around his knees. He looked at Tony and smiled wanly. “Hello, human,” he said in a small voice.

Tony joined him and took him securely in his arms. “Brucie gave me a rundown on everything.”

The smile stayed fixed on Loki’s face. “Good. Now you understand, yes?”

Tony nodded, and then he just held him for a long time, pressing his cheek against Loki’s temple and massaging the back of his neck. Finally, he asked, “Why didn’t you talk to me, babe? You know you can always talk to me.”

“I knew you wouldn’t believe me. You’re very stupid, sometimes.” Loki looked up at him with a wry grin. “And... I didn’t want to upset you.”

“Oh, yeah. And, I’m not upset at all now.” Tony returned his grin, choking back his tears. Even if everything Loki believed was no more than a delusion, it was still heart-wrenching to know that his love had been going through so much turmoil all on his own. Now it was time to take away some of that burden, time to show Loki that he, Tony, was strong. He had to be strong for Loki, and he had to stay strong until Loki came back to himself. Then, Tony could happily collapse and scream and cry like a fucking baby if he wanted—but not until. He crushed Loki tightly against him, brushing his lips across Loki’s forehead.

“I’m sorry,” Loki said in a whisper. “I’m so sorry it’s like this. But, everything will be all right, you know. You and the baby will have a good life, and I’ll—”

“Shh,” Tony said, gently covering Loki’s lips with his fingers. “I-I don’t want to talk about it right now.” He kissed Loki, pouring all the love and faith he had into caressing the soft warmth of the trickster’s mouth, reveling in the primal energy that always seemed to reverberate through Loki’s body. 

Loki kissed back, knowing he had to savor every loving touch, every sweet moment with Tony, from now until... 

Well. Until he no longer could.

But they both stilled as a low rumble shook through the whole of Stark Tower.

******

Bruce looked up at the disturbance, trying to identify which direction it was coming from. “Sounds like Big Brother Thor might be dropping in for a visit,” he mused.

As predicted, a few minutes passed and then Thor stalked into the room, his face set in a worried frown. “Where’s Loki?”

Bruce shot a glance at Pepper before replying. He hoped to hell Thor wasn’t bringing a fresh wave of bad news; he didn’t think Tony could take it. “He and Tony are in their bedroom. What do you need with him?”

“Mother’s been having Heimdall keep an eye on him, and the watcher seems to think Loki’s going through a difficult time. Is that true?”

“Yes,” they both said in unison.

“What’s wrong with him?”

Bruce bit his lip, considering the question. Finally, he answered, “You know when I said Loki’s brain is a bagful of cats? Well, those cats have had kittens, and now they’re all fighting for the last bowlful of cat chow.”

A puzzled expression took over Thor’s handsome face. “Explain?”

“He’s had some sort of breakdown,” Pepper said gently. “He thinks he’s doomed to suffer forever, and that his presence will endanger not only Tony and the baby, but the whole world. So...”

“Oh, no.” Thor glared up at the ceiling in exasperation. “Damn him! Such a willful creature, so headstrong and foolish.” He made a tsk’ing sound. “Mother was right.”

“What do you mean?” Bruce asked. 

Thor turned his gaze to Bruce, then Pepper. “Many years ago, Loki was prowling around Father’s library and he discovered a Midgardian book about the so-called ancient myths of our people. It was quite hilarious—ridiculous tales about all of us, including Loki himself. We gained no end of amusement from it. In fact, we used to pass the time reading it aloud to each other over a few pints of mead.” He gave a wry chuckle. “You wouldn’t believe some of the nonsense it claimed we got up to. But, one particular tale seemed to disturb Loki greatly—the prophecy of Ragnarok, the doom of gods and men. According to the story, Loki is supposed to lead one side of a great battle, I the other, and in the end, the whole world is destroyed. Perfectly absurd, but it seemed to rankle with Loki.” Thor strode to the window and looked out onto the city for a moment. Then, he turned and went back to his story.

“Ages later, when Loki was being treated by the mind-healer, he spoke of that tale over and over again. Seemed obsessed with it, actually. The healer prescribed a draught that he would have to take every third Midgardian moon in order to keep the morbid thoughts from preying on his mind. It worked beautifully, but we were cautioned that Loki must take the draught regularly, or the thoughts would endlessly return. Mother sent me to give him his latest dose.” He shrugged tiredly before reaching into his tunic and pulling out a glass vial. He held it in his hand and stared at it as if reproving its contents for not being inside Loki where they belonged. 

“I know it’s been at least twelve months since he last took the medicine. Said he was fine, that he didn’t need it anymore. Well, clearly he was wrong.” Thor spoke disgustedly and thrust the vial back in his tunic. 

“Do you think it’ll help, after being off of it for so long?” Bruce asked.

“Oh, yes. It will take a few days, but I have confidence that it’ll be just as effective as before.”

“But, will it hurt the baby?” Pepper asked.

“Mother consulted long and hard with the healer, and he assured her that it will not. She even spoke with Farbauti, who says it is perfectly safe.”

“Loki won’t believe that,” Bruce pointed out.

A giant sigh escaped Thor’s lips. “As I well know. He’s been reluctant enough to take it as it is, now he has an additional excuse.” He cast a probing look at Bruce. “How badly off is he?”

“He’s talking about... sacrificing himself. To save the world.”

For the first time, Thor’s stern features softened. “Oh, my poor brother. For so long he’s been plagued with such demons.” He brushed a strand of golden hair away from his face. “If only Father would relent and allow him to return to Asgard. We could care for him properly there, see that he takes his medication, make sure he—”

“Tony can do all that. We’ll help. We just have to know what to do,” Pepper stated with a bit of heat. “Maybe if we’d known about the meds, we could have avoided this whole episode.”

Bruce nodded gravely. “We’re his family, now, Thor. Part of it, anyway.”

Thor looked slowly from Bruce, back to Pepper. “You have come to care for him?” he asked, sounding a bit incredulous.

“That may be overstating it a little,” Bruce said wryly. “But, we love Tony, and he loves Loki. So... Yeah. Family it is.”

Thor stood silently for a moment. Then, he lunged forward and gathered Bruce in one arm, Pepper in the other, and hugged them tightly. “My friends. Thank you.” He released them and grinned heartily. “With your help, I’m sure Loki will find his way back to good health. I will go now and convince him to take the draught. It is my hope he will do so without complaint, but I doubt it. He’s so contrary, arguing for the sake of argument, it’s very frustrating.”

“You might be surprised,” Bruce said. “He’s been pretty accommodating lately. He let me stick him with a needle.”

Thor had already started heading toward the bedroom, but he stopped short and turned to look sharply at Bruce. “Gods. Things are worse than I thought,” he said under his breath. With renewed haste, he took off down the hallway, his cape fluttering behind him.

*******

Thor paused at the doorway and listened; far too many times, he’d walked in on Loki doing all sorts of things with all sorts of people, all of which seemed to require him having his trousers down around his ankles. Thor feared seeing him in bed with the Man of Iron would burn an image into his brain that would make it hard for him to look Tony in the eye. But he heard only soft voices, and he made a point of clearing his throat loudly before saying, “Come out, Loki. I need have a word with you.” 

There was absolute silence for a moment, and then a mischievous-sounding voice offered an invitation. “Hello, Brother! Why don’t you come on in?” Before Thor could answer, Tony was opening the door, thankfully fully clothed. 

“Uh, that’s all right, Point Break. Listen, I’ll leave you two to talk, but...” Tony slipped out and closed the door behind him. “Did Banner tell you what’s been going on?”

“He and Lady Pepper told me some things, and Mother shared Heimdall’s observations. I take it Loki has not been himself?”

“He’s going through some shit, and I don’t know what to do to help him.”

Thor brought out the vial. “I do. He’s missed a few doses of his medication. If he’ll take it now, he should be better in a few days.”

The grim set of Tony’s face melted into an expression of utter relief. “That’s it? That’s all? Are you serious? Are you sure it’ll work?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, my God, that’s fantastic.” Tony braced himself with one hand on Thor’s shoulder, a flood of gratitude washing through his whole being, leaving him weak in the knees. “Fantastic, shit! You’re my hero, big guy.”

“That’s assuming the wretched little bastard will take it.”

Tony looked up. “Oh, he’ll take it. I’ll see to that. Come on, I’ll hold him down for you—”

Thor chuckled. “I don’t think that will be necessary. Allow me a few moments alone with him. I think I can convince him—I’ve done it before.”

“Okay. But, holler if you need help. If that stuff’ll give me my Loki back, I’ll sit on his chest while you pry his jaws open.”

“If Loki doesn’t want to do something, it takes more than one little mortal to hold him down. Don’t worry, Man of Iron. I know how to handle my brother.”

“Ye-e-e-ah, well, experience doesn’t really support that, but okay. I’ll be right out here.”

Thor winked confidently and strode into the bedroom.

*****

When Thor walked in, Loki was perched on the edge of the bed, also fully dressed, much to Thor’s relief. Loki gave Thor an impish look. “Apologies. Tony ran off before I could properly embarrass you.”

“I’m forever grateful for that.” Thor sat down heavily next to Loki and stared straight ahead. “I hear you’re feeling poorly.”

“Not at all. I’m perfectly well.”

“Not according to Dr. Banner. Nor Tony.” He looked at Loki. “Your mind sickness is back.”

Loki gave a bitter chuckle. “That’s what you call it. I call it being realistic.” He turned his head to face Thor, and Thor could see the fevered passion in the dark green eyes. “I know very well what’s going to happen, and I know precisely what I must do to prevent it. There’s nothing ‘sick’ about that.”

“It’s a story, Loki, it’s not real. It never was and never will be. You know that.”

Loki’s voice rose. “What I know is that that... that quack cooked up some sort of potion to dull my mind. That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? You’re going to try to force that swill down my throat again!” 

“Sh-sh-sh. Calm yourself, brother. Please.” Thor put a hand on Loki’s shoulder, which he immediately shrugged off. “Mother sent me. She’s very concerned. You’ve missed several doses, and you know how she worries.” He sought Loki’s eyes. “You don’t want her to worry, do you?”

Loki was nearly sputtering with anger, but he forced himself to be calm. He knew Thor’s insipid tricks, trying to get to him through his mother. Before, he would have bested him handily, arguing in circles until Thor gave up, but... but, now, he knew that would be wrong. _Don’t stir things up... Don’t make them notice you... Buy yourself some time, stay small, stay hidden…_

Instead of a torrent of rage, Loki spoke simply, genuinely trying to get Thor to understand. “I don’t like that stuff, Thor. It makes me feel weird. I can’t think straight, it makes me a ghost. A shadow. I don’t cry, but neither do I laugh. On it, I’m nothing, nil, a cipher, and I hate it.” He again met Thor’s worried gaze. “Don’t make me take it. Please.”

“Loki.” Thor shook his head and pulled his brother close. “I know you don’t like the feeling, but that’s only at first. It goes away in a few days, and then you feel fine. Remember the last time? You thanked me for insisting.” Thor took the vial out of his shirt and squeezed Loki’s shoulder. “Please, Loki. Don’t send me back to Mother in disgrace. She’ll have my head.” He smiled hopefully at Loki, and after a moment of staring at Thor, Loki smiled a little, too. But then he frowned.

“It could hurt the baby.”

“No. It’s completely safe. Mother checked very carefully, and you know she’d take no chances with her grandchild’s health. It’s fine, Loki. Take it.” He proffered the vial to Loki, and Loki took it from his hand. 

He turned it back and forth between his thumb and forefinger, apparently musing on its properties. “And, what if I were to drop it on the hard floor? Do you think it would break?”

Thor sighed. “Mother prepared me for that eventuality. I have a second bottle. If I have to use it, well—let’s just say you won’t have the opportunity to drop that one.” A small grin played at his lips and Loki rolled his eyes. 

“So, in truth, I have no choice in the matter.”

Thor met his eyes and they stared at each other for a long moment. “Loki, you’re ill. You know that. You’ve worked so hard to get well, and you’ve gained so much. Please, please try to remember how good you were feeling before. The medicine helped you get there, you need it. I’m so sorry, but you do. Please.” Thor gently gripped the hand Loki held the bottle in. “Take it.”

“Take it!” Tony’s muffled voice came from the other side of the door.

Loki couldn’t help but laugh. “All right. I can’t fight you both.” He held the vial up to the light, and then uncorked it. He sniffed the familiar acrid scent and then held it to his lips, letting the thick liquid slide down his throat. He set the empty bottle on the nightstand and grimaced at the bitter taste, but then Thor held out a little teacake wrapped in foil, the kind that Frigga herself had often made for her sons when they were growing up. Loki smiled ruefully as he unwrapped it and took a bite. Frigga was a smart woman, he thought. The flavor of the sweet lemony pastry filled his senses and swept away the nasty medicine taste. He sighed, but gestured for Thor to let Tony in.    
Tony saw the empty vial sitting on the nightstand and he dropped to his knees in front of Loki. He wrapped his arms around his lover’s rounded middle and laid his head on what was left of Loki’s lap. 

He really didn’t care what Thor thought; he just wanted to keep Loki from noticing he was crying.


	39. Chapter 39

Well, it was just like Thor said. 

For the next few days, Loki slept more than ever, the difference being that, mostly, he stayed in his and Tony’s bed. In the early morning hours, when Tony finally left his lab and made his way to his bedroom, Loki would sleepily greet him, curling up against him and sighing contentedly—no more scooting away and disappearing. That alone was enough for Tony. It gave him a sense of peace, knowing that while Loki was temporarily a bit of a zombie, at least he wasn’t suffering anymore. Plus, it gave him hope that Loki would soon be back to his old self.

And, while at first Loki felt as if he he were swimming through mud, weirdly disassociated from his surroundings (and even his own body), he gradually found himself smiling again. The movements inside him—the slithery feeling of his baby twisting and turning, the nudges, the kicks—these made him grin, and he often engaged in little conversations with the fetus: “My, we’re on a tear today, aren’t we? Settle down, little one, Daddy wants to sleep,” and “Love, do you suppose you might find a corner of my innards to abuse besides my bladder? I do believe I’ve worn a path to the toilet with this incessant peeing,” and “How nice of you to attempt to kick my ribs back into place, after having dislocated that one so many times. Very considerate, indeed.” 

But, he didn’t really mind. 

His appetite was gone. Tony would bring his favorite foods, taking a seat alongside him on the bed and cajoling him to eat little bites from his fingers. The food didn’t sit so well at first, but eventually real hunger crept up on Loki and drove him to the kitchen in search of snacks. At that, Tony rejoiced. The night Loki requested a pizza was cause for wild celebration, and when, to Tony’s surprise, Loki readily agreed to have Bruce and Pepper join them for dinner, he felt like they’d just scaled a mountain.

Yeah, Tony thought as Loki stared at his barely-touched pizza slice, it was going to take a while. But then Loki took a deep breath, picked up the slice, and gamely took one more bite. 

It was definitely not going to happen overnight, but...

Loki was getting there.

*****

As the days went by, Loki became more alert and less content to lie in a useless lump on the bed. Soon, he took to prowling around the penthouse, and while the weight of his body seemed to drag at him, he couldn’t bear to sit still for long. He couldn’t quite pinpoint what it was that compelled him (although he knew it was more than just restlessness), but he often found himself slipping wraithlike from room to room, vaguely aware that he was looking for something.

One day, he paused in front of the bedroom next to his and Tony’s. He stood motionless for a long time, but finally opened the door and peered inside. It was a large never-used room, with unpleasantly crisp white walls and a boring light fixture in the ceiling, but there was a huge picture window and the hardwood floor was inviting and homey. 

Loki stepped in and turned slowly in a circle, letting the feel of the room wash over him. He envisioned a thick wooly rug, soft-hued paint, and warm light from a whimsical chandelier. Nice heavy curtains to block out the city at night, a crib in one corner, a dresser and changing table in the other, and a big comfortable rocking chair in the middle. There was plenty of room for bookshelves and a toy chest, with space in the floor for rolling around and playing. Perhaps Tony would agree to knock out an opening between this room and theirs; they could always put in a door when the creature, no, the _child,_ grew old enough to crave privacy. Or, when he and Tony did, ha. Loki’s grin deepened, and he nodded to himself as he felt his unnamed craving ease. 

It wasn’t a royal chamber, but it was a nice enough room. 

It would do.

******

Let’s face it, Tony was horny.

The day he’d grasped, horrified, that Loki was participating in sex only to please him, all contact between their nether regions ended. At that point, Tony offered—and asked for—nothing more than an occasional hug or cuddle. But, for those long, bad weeks of his illness, Loki had politely declined even that, leaving Tony feeling profoundly alone, even on the nights that Loki was able to relax enough to sleep beside him.

Now, slowly, Loki was welcoming him back into his arms. For Tony, every little step was exciting—the feeling of his mate’s body next to his, the cool skin, the regular breaths, the pulse throbbing beneath the surface. It was heaven being close enough to hear his heart beat, to breathe in the scent of his hair, to know that the strange, awful presence that was Loki’s illness was finally going away. 

Still, Tony didn’t push. He didn’t touch Loki below the waist and he limited kisses to brushes over his forehead and chaste pecks on the cheek, even though his cock throbbed hopefully and his balls ached, and he felt like he did when he was eight years old and his Red Ryder BB gun jammed.

In other words, his sex life continued to suck, and not in a good way. 

It was funny how patient he was being, though. _That_ wasn’t like him. Back when he was with Pepper and she’d irritably wave him away, pleading exhaustion due to Tony’s congenital state of idiocy, he’d _argue._ Not his best moments, and he’d like to think he’d learned something since then, but in those days, he’d blow up in frustration and slam the door behind him before settling on the couch with some lube and a wash cloth, intent on pleasuring himself to his heart’s content, guilt-free.

But, now, that solo thing... He hardly bothered to do even that. Maybe he was old, or maybe he didn’t have the heart to jack off, knowing that Loki was miserable. Or maybe he was content to wait until things got better, because when he was with Loki, “right now” was good enough, even if it was hard, even if things were kind of shitty between them. Besides, when the day came that Loki was back to normal, Tony planned to give him the good, solid pounding he owed him. He figured this slow burn, this building up to that extra bit of oomph that came from a long stretch of orgasm denial, wouldn’t hurt.

So, he was patient, and he quietly reveled in the beating of Loki’s heart.

*****

Things did get better, though. 

Loki’s grins came more frequently. Here and there, he made a derisive joke at Tony’s expense. He ate. And, one night, he snuggled into Tony’s arms, ground his hips against him, and kissed him. Tony pulled out of the long, lingering moment to look Loki in the eye. He saw none of the troubling vacancy he’d almost gotten used to seeing there. Instead, he saw mischief and fire, and Loki’s grin took on the delightfully wicked quality that always got Tony to thinking about clothes coming off, and nuzzling, and the fun of putting-things-inside-of-other-things that Loki so excelled at. 

“Babe?” he asked. “Are you—”

“I want you, Tony,” Loki answered in a gravelly voice. “It’s been so long.”

“Ye-a-hhh... But, are you sure? I mean, you’re not doing this just for me, right?”

Loki stared at him. “Hardly. I’m a selfish bastard, remember? This is very much for me. If it happens to benefit you as well, well—so be it.”

“Baby, it would benefit the everlovin’ hell out of me.” 

“Good.” Loki rolled on his back, draped an arm languidly above his head, and pulled a knee up invitingly. “So, I take it you’re game, dear mortal?”

Tony was so happy and relieved, he laughed out loud. “Game? Are you kidding? I’m on it!” He clambered onto Loki and smooshed their mouths together in an inelegant attack that would do any teenage Lothario proud. He managed to unzip his jeans while at the same time helping Loki wriggle out of the stretchy sleep pants that now barely covered his pregnant tummy. Tony fumbled for lube and started to prepare Loki, only to be struck in the heart when Loki yelped, “Wait!” 

But he was beyond grateful to learn that Loki only wanted to shift to his Jotunn form.

From there? Yeah, things got a whole lot better.

They eagerly rubbed their dicks together and laughed between sloppy kisses. They licked and sucked, they nibbled and bit, and they ended up with Tony grasping Loki in a fierce embrace, rocking into him like it was 1986, the year Tony joyfully lost his virginity in the back seat of a black ‘56 Pontiac. 

Loki groaned and yowled, left scratches down Tony’s back and teeth marks on his neck. He planted his heels and slammed up to take him deeper. He cursed and moaned and rasped Tony’s name, and, wrecked, he finally came in a deep long shudder, hard enough to stop time.

It didn’t take Tony long after that; feeling Loki’s snug quim tighten and spasm around him put him over the edge, and he rammed into Loki until he filled him with all the gleeful little sperm that had been obediently biding their time for so many long, desolate weeks.

Afterwards, they lay there, breaths coming in gasps, until Loki turned to wrap himself around Tony like a vine around a tree. Tony tucked him into the empty space beside him, pulled the covers over them, and they fell asleep without a word.

*****

In the morning, Tony woke to see Loki glaring at him, wide awake and resentful, from his nest in Tony’s side. “I’m hungry,” he snapped, as if this were somehow Tony’s fault. “Feed me this instant.” 

Tony was groggy, but he sat up, chuckling. “Okay, babe, sure—anything you want.”

“Blueberry pancakes. Fluffy. With lots of butter and syrup. _Now.”_

“All right, all right. I _think_ I can remember how to make pancakes—”

Loki rolled his eyes. “No, no, no. Take me out. Somewhere expensive, where they’ll follow my instructions and not pretend that charred edges are a proper part of the meal.”

Tony came to full alertness, blinking at Loki. “You want to go out?”

“Yes. Oh, and it had better be some place elegant, too. I want to wear that black velvet tunic with the green cuffs and collar, which, by the way, is most certainly _not_ a maternity shirt.” He struggled into a sitting position, rueing how awkward his belly made such simple movements. “I like the way it feels. And, it really brings out my eyes.” He paused a moment, considering Tony with a calculating squint. “And, I’ll bet it’ll make you horny as hell. Your dick’ll swell and I’ll get to watch you squirm in your chair, with nothing to be done about it until we get home. It will be delightful.” He smirked with satisfaction.

Tony grinned. “Oh, you think so? Challenge accepted, Lancelot.”

And, as he was getting a blow job in the men’s room stall of the Ritz-Carlton’s extremely elegant and expensive bistro, it occurred to Tony that Loki was just about back to his old self.

*****

Loki sat curled up in Tony’s desk chair, pecking at the keys of Tony’s laptop and frowning. Tony was sprawled on the office couch, ostensibly going through the much-overdue contracts that Pepper had washed her hands of, but he was actually puzzling over a new feature he wanted to add to his suit. His free fall to earth from space still rumbled through his dreams, and he was determined to create an emergency reserve of power that wouldn’t add a lot of weight to the suit. He sincerely hoped he’d never need it, but it didn’t hurt to be prepared.

“Tony,” came a rather indignant voice. “Did you know they just recalled an Ikea baby swing? Apparently, the suspension fittings can break, posing a risk of serious injury.”

“Really? That’s interesting,” Tony murmured, not finding it interesting at all.

“Yes, there have been four reports of this happening so far.”

“Huh.”

Loki looked up from the computer screen. “A child fractured his leg!”

“Oh. Well, that’s bad.”

“Of course it’s bad, you nitwit.” Something in Loki’s tone told Tony he’d better pay attention. Something else... a word... told him he should _really_ pay attention, but what was it? A word, Loki said a word, and—oh. _Oh._

Tony’s head jerked up like a prairie dog. “Did you say ‘baby swing?’” 

Loki shot him an exasperated look. “I did.”

Tony jumped up, scattering papers all over the couch, and zipped to Loki’s side. He peered down at the screen to see a picture of the offending product and then he looked at Loki. “Are you… _planning?_ For the baby?”

“Well, somebody has to,” Loki said with a sniff. “You certainly haven’t shown any interest.”

“Interest? Loki, I...” _I’ve been so damned worried about you, when did I have time to coo over baby swings?_ he thought, but knew better than to say. “I’m sorry, kiddo. Things have been kind of busy in the lab, you know. But, that’s it, that’s over.” He knelt, propping his elbow on the arm of Loki’s chair. “From now on, it’s baby time, all the way.” He looked at Loki in wonder, brushed a strand of hair behind his ear and then glanced back at the laptop screen. Loki had about a million tabs open.

“So, what’s on the menu for baby Stark?”

Loki’s sulky expression faded and he clicked through several pages. “I’m thinking we do the room in deep chocolate browns and soft greens. Those are gender-neutral tones, aren’t they? Although, I can’t believe you Midgardians assign a gender to colors, how asinine. In the halls of the Aesir, the nurseries are gold, with ruby-colored draperies of the finest silk. Preparation for the child to take its place among the gods.” He cast a reproving glance at Tony. “You won’t find pink rabbits or denim-clad clowns there.” He was quiet for a moment, and it struck Tony that Loki was a little homesick.

“Brown and green look good together, babe, great choice. What else?”

Loki clicked the mouse. “I want a jungle theme. Giraffes, tigers—oh, and elephants. Definitely elephants, don’t you think? They’re so friendly.”

“Sure. Maybe throw in a few Asgardian critters, too.”

“Ugh, no.”

“Why not? Don’t you have friendly animals on Asgard?”

“A few. But, most of them are vicious beasts. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but it seems Midgardians frown on battling animals as nursery themes.”

Tony grinned. “Since when do you care what Midgardians think about anything?”

“I don’t, but as we’re apparently going to have to raise the little bastard amongst them, I don’t want him—or her—to feel at odds with other children.”

“Good thinking.”

Loki clicked back to the product recall page. “Look at this, Tony—page after page of defective contraptions for infants. It’s outrageous, what sort of evil craftsmen does Midgard employ? Who would dare to create products that kill and maim the very creatures they purport to serve?” he wondered. “Surely their numbers must swell the prison population. On Asgard, such deviltry would be met with torture and death, but of course, you humans tend to pussyfoot around on matters of justice. I suppose that’s a good thing, or I most likely wouldn’t be here, but still.”

“Well, they make this stuff in factories, babe. I don’t think you could pin it on any one person.”

Loki shook his head gravely. “If such a device ever harmed a child of mine, I’d identify the perpetrator in short order. I’d string him up by his entrails.” The vicious tone in Loki’s voice caught Tony off-guard. He hadn’t seen that side of Loki in a very long time. He gingerly patted Loki’s arm. 

“Aw, don’t worry. We’ll make sure everything’s safe. I’ll inspect it all myself.” A thoughtful look came over him, and then he brightened. “All this stuff’s lame, anyway. You want a baby swing? I bet I can invent a really cool one. Seat warmer, cup holder, variable speed settings that’ll automatically adjust to the kid’s emotional state—ooo, and a dirty diaper sensor! I can put the alert on the remote so the noise won’t wake the baby, and—” He stopped short, his eyes wide. “Top notch built-in Bose speakers, streaming audio! Oh, man, this is gonna be fun!” A maniacal grin transformed his face and for the first time since Loki’s illness, the old Stark cockiness came shining through. “I’m going to run down to the lab and made some sketches—want to come?”

Loki was staring at him with a slightly horrified look, but he gave Tony a wry smile at the invitation. “I expect I’d better. Don’t want you putting jet thrusters on the damned thing.”

“Aw, not on a baby swing! Wait’ll I work up a design for a tricycle, though.” 

Tony sprang up and strode toward the door, and Loki heaved himself up to follow. 

He wondered how normal people prepared for a baby’s arrival.


	40. Pepper's Idea

It was a quiet New York morning when Pepper brought in her mail. She stopped to flip through it, standing by her apartment door, and an ad from a suburban department store caught her eye. 

She peered at it for a long moment. Normally, she just threw stuff like that away, but apparently it was “Baby Month!” and the cover featured adorable infants in kicky outfits playing with expensive toys. Pepper felt the germ of an idea forming in the back of her mind. 

A really, really bad idea.

******

Pepper and Bruce had been to dinner chez Stark pretty regularly for the last few weeks. At first, she was sure it was Tony pushing Loki to get more socialized among humans, but by now she thought it was possible that Loki himself was initiating the contact. He seemed to genuinely like Bruce, and the last time she’d been over, Loki had bitten his lip before tentatively asking her, “Would you like to see the progress on the nursery?” 

Of course she’d accepted, just to be polite, but she’d found herself sincerely oohing and ahhing over the creamy wall colors, the soft draperies, and the whimsical light fixtures. “Wow—it’s gorgeous!” she’d said.

“Do you really think so? Would you say it’s in keeping with Midgardian tastes?” Loki had asked with a touch of anxiousness that bewildered Pepper. Since when did Loki, the goddamned God of Mischief, give a crap about what she thought? She’d mentally ignored her own question and answered, “Uh—well, yeah, of course. It’s lovely.”

Loki’d nodded absently, running a hand down a cheery jungle-themed curtain. “Good. I want it to feel... as normal as possible,” he’d said, almost to himself.

“Normal? What do you mean?” 

Loki had given a bitter laugh. “I expect the little demon will hate me enough for bringing it into a world that regards its Jotunn features as strange, maybe even horrible. No need to have it hate me for inappropriate decor, as well.”

Oh. Suddenly, Pepper had understood. She’d felt a rush of empathy for Loki as it occurred to her that, really, he was no different than any other parent-to-be, worrying about their little one’s happiness. She’d wished they were close enough that she could give him a quick hug, but had a feeling they weren’t quite there yet. 

“Well, this looks great, it’s perfect. Now all you need is some furniture. Have you thought about a crib?” she’d asked instead, hoping to divert Loki from his melancholy mood. 

Loki had brightened for a moment, but a sardonic sneer came over him almost immediately. “Oh, yes. Unfortunately, Tony has notions about fashioning all the baby’s things himself. I wouldn’t mind, except he’s much too busy to accomplish it all in time, plus, I really don’t think every item needs to have a super-computer built into it, do you?” he’d asked, rolling his eyes. “There was a time when I simply would’ve told him to restrain himself, or face being transported to the frozen North in only his under clothes. But now, I sense it’s important for him to feel a part of everything.” He’d frowned distastefully and offered Pepper an aside. “Carrying on a mutually satisfactory relationship with a headstrong fellow like Tony Stark is exceedingly difficult.”

Well, that was the pot calling the kettle black, Pepper’d thought before giving a scornful hmph. “Yeah, well, I wouldn’t know.”

Loki had turned from his musings to look at her, holding her gaze for a moment. Then, they’d both burst into laughter. “No, of course you wouldn’t,” Loki had chuckled, but then he’d looked taken aback. “Oh—apologies. This must be difficult for you.” 

_Loki? Empathy?_ Wow, Pepper had thought before pursing her lips and shrugging. “I guess. I mean... it was, at first.” 

“Only at first?” Loki had asked skeptically.

She’d looked thoughtful, and slowly added, “Yeah, okay—it still is, a little. Honestly, I never really thought I’d settle down with Tony, but, even so, you think about things when you’re with someone. You get ideas, and when things don’t work out, well...” She’d sighed and then forced a smile. “Look, never mind about all that. I’m happy that Tony’s happy, and while I never would have believed it, if you’re the one to give him that, then, okay. I just want to move on.”

Loki had nodded. “That’s good of you. Tony’s lucky to still have you as a friend.”

Pepper had shaken off the awkward moment and said, “Hey, I’m starving. Let’s go see if dinner’s ready.” They’d headed back to the living area to join Bruce and Tony, and now, thumbing through the mail in her hand, it struck Pepper that that was the first time she and Loki had ever come close to having a real conversation.

******

Pepper roused herself from her thoughts when Bruce came striding out of the bedroom, pulling on his jacket as he walked. “Damn, it’s nearly 9:30, I’ve got to run, sweetie. I’ll see you tonight.”

“Bruce? Take a look at this.” Pepper held up the baby-speckled ad. “Do you know what I’m thinking?”

Bruce came to an abrupt halt. His eyebrows shot up and he gaped for a moment before coming over to put his hands on Pepper’s shoulders.. “Oh, Pepper, no. We’ve talked about this, honey. I thought you understood! We have no way of knowing what kind of genetic Hiroshima my sperm have been through, and—”

Pepper’s face scrunched up in dismay. “Oh, for heaven’s sake. That’s not what I was thinking at all. And, you know I’m not interested in getting pregnant! We agreed—if we ever decide to have kids, we’ll adopt. Did you think I’d lost my mind?”

It was sort of funny how relief washed over Bruce’s face. “Whew. Well, thank God. Okay.” He glanced at a clock. “Jeeze, I’m sorry, but I really have to run—you can tell me all about it tonight.” He gave Pepper a quick peck and then dashed out the door. 

“Seriously?” Pepper asked herself out loud, shaking her head as she went back to sorting the mail.

*****

That afternoon, Pepper dropped in to see Tony, and he regarded her with a mock-fearful expression.

“Oh, no. What are you doing here? Don’t tell me—contracts. Did I screw something up?”

“I’m sure you did, but that’s not why I’m here. I wanted to talk to you about an idea I had.”

Tony went back to his usual “I’m Tony Stark and I’m cooler than you’ll ever hope to be” manner as he threw a palmful of blueberries in his mouth. “Nice. I love ideas.”

“I don’t know if you’ll love this one.”

Tony raised an eyebrow. “Try me.”

“I want to throw a baby shower for Loki.”

Tony’s jaw continued to munch and for a second Pepper thought maybe he wasn’t familiar with the term, but then his eyes widened. “A baby shower? What the... Who… _Why?_ Why would you want to do that?”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s weird, that’s why! Men don’t have baby showers.”

“Men typically don’t have babies either, not from their own personal bodies.”

“Aw, Pep!” Tony whined. “This sounds like one of those things you do that I’ll regret. A lot.” He flopped down on the couch like a sulky teenager.

Pepper shoved his feet out of the way and sat down on the end. “Tony, listen to me. I know I haven’t been Loki’s biggest fan, but I can see that he really has changed and is trying to earn our trust. I believe in second chances.” She grinned, a little wistfully. “Sometimes, even a third or fourth. So, I’d like to show him that he’s got friends here on Midgard.”

Tony shot her a narrow-eyed look. “Does he?”

Pepper nodded. “Yes. Bruce and I have talked about it a lot. He agrees that Loki deserves our support, and having a baby shower would be a fun way to show that.”

“Fun? Seriously? I think you mean horrible. Awkward. Boring. Or, any combination thereof.”

“No, I’ll make it fun.”

“How?”

“I’ve got some ideas, but that’s not important right now. What I need is for you to find out if Loki’s okay with it.”

“Oh, the fact that I hate the idea doesn’t matter, but you’re worried about ol’ Reindeer Games having a stick up his butt?” He gave her a suspicious squint. “What’d he do to charm his way into your teeny-bopper heart anyway, huh? Yeah, yeah, I know. He does have that Sixteen Magazine/Tiger Beat thing going for him, with the hair and all, but—”

“I just wanted to do something nice for him. That, and shop for little tiny clothes and baby accessories. Our social circle doesn’t offer a lot of opportunities to do things like that, you know.”

Tony sneered in as superior a manner as he could manage, but he didn’t hold it for long. He laughed. “Okay, I get it, I guess. But, what am I supposed to ask him, exactly?”

“Just make sure it’s not some colossal Asgardian faux-pas to get a bunch of people together to give gifts to a god’s unborn baby. If it’s okay, tell him I want to get with him to decide on the guest list and the menu. Oh, and we’re having it here, just so you know.”

“Here? Why?” Tony wailed.

“Because, you have a little more room than I do. And, if he wants to invite anyone from beyond the solar system, it’s less conspicuous for them to arrive on the roof of Stark Tower than at my place. Right?”

“I guess.”

“Okay, well, call me after you talk to him, I want to get on this asap. Judging by the size of his tummy, we don’t have a whole lot of time before Tony Jr. gets here.”

“No Junior. Ebenezer or Dorothea.”

Pepper stared steadily at him. “You _are_ kidding, right?”

“Says the woman we call Pepper. Yeah, kidding. I’m hoping if I razz Tall, Dark and Preggo enough, he’ll actually come up with something we can both live with. It’s not working so far, though.”

“I’ll give it some thought.” She grinned. “Maybe we can turn it into a shower game. ‘Name Baby Stark.’ We’ll tell Loki it’s an old Midgardian tradition.”

“He won’t buy it, but can’t hurt to try.”

“Okay. Call me.”

“Will do.”

Tony saluted and then watched as Pepper left, allowing himself a hefty groan once the door closed behind her. Then, he got up and headed to Loki’s new favorite hangout—the nursery. He wasn’t looking forward to telling him about Pepper’s plan. He was pretty sure he’d hate it, put his foot down and refuse to attend. 

If Pepper was an irresistible force, Loki could be one immovable object, and he, Tony, had to play it so he didn’t get squished between the two of them.

*****

Loki was staring critically at the wall where they planned to place the crib. It was a pose Tony had caught him in several times over the last couple of days, but he hadn’t ventured inside to see what Loki was looking at, fearing that the wall color no longer suited him and it would be up to Tony to call his painter to come re-do the job—again. But as he entered, he saw the outline of a mural adorning the wall, and that Loki had a pencil in his hand.

“Babe? What’re you doing?” Tony asked curiously.

“I would think that would be obvious, but perhaps your preoccupation with all things mechanical has dulled your mind’s artistic sense.” He gave Tony a scornful look, but then it melted into a grin. “I’m working on a jungle scene,” he added cheerily.

Tony stepped closer, noting the fluid lines of trees and animals that Loki had apparently sketched out himself. “You can draw?” he asked, impressed.

“Of course I can draw,” Loki snapped. “I can do a great many creative things.” He leaned in and added fangs to a chipper-looking snake twined around a tree trunk as Tony watched over his shoulder. 

“Wow. This is pretty cool,” Tony said.

“Yes. It’s just taking forever. Everything is so tedious without my seidr.”

“Isn’t that cheating?” 

Loki gave him a questioning look. “What do you mean?”

“Well, it seems dishonest. using magic to create art.”

A patronizing smile crossed Loki’s face. “Ah. You have no idea how seidr works, do you?”

“Uh, well, I think I do. Kind of wham-bam-kapow, look, there’s a hole where your nuclear reactor used to be, right?”

Loki chuckled. “It’s all about manipulating matter and energy. Yes, I can gather energy and cause it to act upon an object, moving or destroying it. But I can’t ‘create’ matter or energy out of nothing. So, if I had paint, I could cause it to appear on a wall in whatever design I chose, but it would be my design, created by the same process I’m using now, only in the blink of an eye instead of days or weeks.” He crossed his arms over his prominent belly and frowned. “Which reminds me. Will you take me to buy some paint today?”

“Sure—anything you want.” Tony pulled Loki to him and kissed him tenderly before looking around the room. “You know, this kid is going to have the best room ever. I’m totally jealous. Could you paint a 50’s style sci-fi book cover over our bed? I could embed real rockets in it, make the bed vibrate like a son-of-a-bitch.”

“Of course, my love,” Loki said with indulgent sarcasm. “We’ll have to use precautions so as not to eject the child into the stratosphere, but that shouldn’t be a problem for my clever inventor.” He returned Tony’s sweet kiss and then turned back to the mural.

Tony cleared his throat, mentally flailing to get back to his original reason for coming into the nursery. “Clever, yeah, that’s me, ha ha. Um... Listen, uh... Pepper wants to throw you a baby shower.” He pulled himself upright and said it as casually as he could, as if announcing that they were out of milk.

Loki had been just about to add another touch to his work, but he came to a halt with his arm in the air. He jerked his head to face Tony and asked, _“What?”_

“Pepper. Baby shower. Sound good?” Tony pulled his phone out of his pocket and waggled it from side to side. “Great, I’ll give her a call, she—”

“Hold it.” Loki took the phone away from Tony. “Back up, Stark. What do you mean, Pepper wants to give me a baby shower?”

“Uh, yeah, it’s this thing, a party, where guests bring presents for the baby, and—”

“I know what a baby shower is, you dullard! Do you think I learned nothing from my forced hours of watching imbecilic Midgardian TV? My question is _why._ Why would Pepper take it upon herself to host such an inane event in my honor?”

“Great question, babe. Really good question. I, uh... I think it’s because she, uh...” 

Tony almost said “because, dude, she feels sorry for you,” but the genius part of his brain just managed to catch himself, and he said, “...because she loves parties!” before he got himself—and Pepper—into a very ugly place indeed.

Loki was now standing face-to-face with Tony, eyeing him quizzically. “Hm. Well, I like parties, too. But, I can’t imagine anyone would want to come, given my standing in the community.”

“Aw, babe.” Tony gave him a hug. “You’ve made some friends. And you can invite anyone you want from Asgard. Don’t worry, it’ll be fine, no matter how many people show up.”

Loki smiled a little before becoming a bit peevish. “Oh, but it’s ridiculous—we don’t need gifts, you can afford anything our whelp might require. Don’t you think it’s wrong to expect people to spend their money under such circumstances?”

Tony blinked at his boyfriend. Was Loki actually being unselfish?? Tony hadn’t expected that. “No! It’s not about money—people like to buy stuff for babies. Makes ‘em feel part of it, they like thinking the kid’ll have something special from them. ‘Look, sweetie, let’s put on the bunny sweater Aunt Pepper knitted for you!’”

Loki snickered. “Do you mean to tell me Pepper Potts actually knits?”

Tony laughed too, but he nodded. “Yeah, she does. Says it relaxes her. ‘Course, I’ve never seen her come up with anything but neck scarves—freakin’ tons of neck scarves—but, who knows? She might have learned a new stitch or two by now.”

The amusement faded and Loki frowned and stayed quiet. Tony gestured at his phone with a questioning look. “So? Do I give her the go-ahead?”

Loki dropped his eyes. “You... You don’t think it’s some sort of joke, do you?”

“Huh?”

“You know... To embarrass me, to remind me that I’m...” He ran a hand over his tummy. “... that I’m not really a man.”

“Aw, jeeze, Loki, that’s bullshit.” Tony grasped Loki’s face in his hands and forced him to look him in the eye. “First, don’t ever let me hear you say that again. You’re different, yeah, but you’re amazing and I wouldn’t change anything about who you are today. Second, Pepper wouldn’t do something like that. She’s honest and she’s real. If she wanted to give you some grief, she’d stand right in front of you and tell you exactly what she thinks of you. This party, this baby shower—it’s a nice thing she’s doing. She just wants to welcome the baby. And you.” He stepped back and he and Loki stared at each other.

Tony sighed. “Look, if you don’t want to do it, I’ll tell her,” he said flatly. “But, I hope it’s because of how much you hate the idea of being the center of attention, and not because you don’t trust our friends.”

“Well—I do so hate being the center of attention,” Loki mused, repressing a snarky grin. “But, I suppose I’ll suffer through it.” He handed Tony his phone. “Call her.”

Tony took the phone and punched in Pepper’s speed dial number. “Pep? He’s in. About the guest list, he says he’s got a lot of friends in the Asgardian militia, mostly elves, dwarves, and giants, so the menu might be a little tricky—” He grinned as Pepper’s voice came through the line in a high-pitched screech, and Loki smiled.

Hands at his waist, he leaned backward, relieving some of the baby-weight on his spine. “I didn’t plan for you, little one,” he thought. “But, you certainly chose a fine papa for yourself. Well done.”

Tony finished harassing Pepper, clicked off his phone and looked up, laughing. “She’ll be by later tonight to go over all the guest stuff with you. For now, let’s hit the art supply store. I’m going to buy you some paint.”

“Thank you,” Loki said in a soft voice. He laid down his pencil and followed as Tony called Happy and told him to bring the car around.


	41. One Baby Shower, Manly, Please

_Two weeks later…_

Pepper gave the scene in Tony’s living room a critical once-over. She sighed, resigned; she’d quickly learned it was tough coming up with decorations for a manly baby shower (also known as “one that Tony was willing to put up with.”) Thankfully, Jane was in town and she willingly took over decor duties, transforming Tony’s ultra-modern steel-and-glass penthouse into something close to a medieval castle at harvest time.

Well, Pepper thought, it was a far cry from the super-cute ‘50‘s retro theme she’d initially envisioned, but it did look good, and was festive as hell. With incense burning, candles glowing, with shimmery jewel-toned fabric festooning the walls, and about a million flowers placed on every flat surface in sight, it definitely said “Celebration!” 

Pepper just hoped it was over the top enough to impress a cranky pregnant god. 

There were heavily draped tables along one side of the room set up with snacks and punch, and another awaiting gifts. Jane had been directing an eye-rolling Tony and delighted Thor in rearranging the furniture, and Thor proudly announced, “There, my love!” once everything was in place. He straightened, hands on his hips, and basked in Jane’s thanks, proud because he’d done well over 90% of the work while Tony just stood around muttering under his breath. Thor then turned to Pepper. “Lady Pepper, this was a marvelous idea. Loki will be so pleased. He’s never had a fete dedicated solely to him before.”

Jane looked up from unfolding a hand-stitched velvet banner proclaiming “Welcome Baby!” and Pepper from filling a tray with delicate triangle-shaped sandwiches. At least she could get away with traditional baby shower-type food.

“Really? Never? What about birthday parties?” Jane asked.

“We celebrate the same day of birth, so the festivities were always in both our honors; of course, being older, my name was always first. And larger.” He frowned thoughtfully. “That always seemed to rankle with Loki, for some reason.”

“You two have the same birthday? That’s freaky,” Tony commented. “I can’t believe you’re both the same star sign.”

Thor looked puzzled for a moment, but then answered, “Yes, I thought it odd myself, but once I learned that Loki was adopted, Father explained that, because they didn’t know the actual date of Loki’s birth, they simply assigned him mine.”

Jane and Pepper shot disapproving glances at each other. “That’s rude,” Pepper said. “Guy ought to get a birthday to himself, if there’s a choice.”

Thor nodded solemnly. “Oh, I agree. But, it’s a bit late to concern ourselves with it now.”

“No wonder Loki has issues,” Bruce said. He’d walked in just in time to hear the exchange, carrying a large gift-wrapped box in one arm, with an equally large gift bag hanging from his other. Pepper had him put them on the gift table. “Is there a way to ask his birth mom what his real birthday is?”

“Ah! An excellent idea! I will pose that to my mother when I go to fetch her from Asgard,” Thor said.

“Speaking of which, don’t you think you’d better get a move on? It’s getting close to go-time,” Pepper said, glancing at a clock.

“Yeah, and I should light a fire under the guest of honor,” Tony agreed. “He probably fell asleep again.”

“I did no such thing.” Loki strode in as imperiously as a six-months pregnant person could manage and looked around. He was sporting a slight sneer, but it faded, and he smiled indulgently at the Midgardian idea of preparing for a party. “Well, this is... quite nice.”

“Thanks,” Pepper said, choosing to ignore Loki’s patronizing tone. “Tell your brother to hurry up and zip off to Asgard before the lime sherbet completely melts in the ginger ale.”

“I’m going, I’m going,” Thor laughed. “I’m sure Mother is growing impatient as well.”

Loki’s grin turned genuine. “She really is coming, then?”

“Of course, little brother,” Thor said, clapping a meaty hand on Loki’s shoulder. “She’s most excited to see you, especially under such happy circumstances.”

“As am I,” Loki said softly. The further along in his pregnancy he got, the more he wished for Frigga’s calming voice and sage advice.

Tony came up and gave him a squeeze while gesturing at Thor. 

“Yeah, Point Break, it’ll be cool to sit around and have a stress-free inter-dimensional chat with your mom for a change.”

“Indeed. Well, I’m off, then.” Thor left to head up to the roof, and in a few moments, they heard a sharp clap of thunder and the room lit up from a flash of lightening just outside the huge picture window.

Pepper and Jane hurried to finish setting up the snack foods. 

******

Not long after Thor’s departure, Steve Rogers and Natasha arrived, each carrying gifts. Tony welcomed them and ushered them into the party. Loki smiled broadly as they approached.

“Captain, Ms. Romanoff. How nice to see you. I wasn’t sure anyone would come.”

“Of course we came, idiot.” Natasha grinned with a twinkle. “Children are our hope for the future, even yours and Tony’s. Why wouldn’t we celebrate?”

Loki chuckled. “Oh, yes. I’m sure a half-Frost Giant walking among pathetic humans will command much hope and celebration. In fact—”

“What Loki meant to say was, welcome, and thank you for coming,” Pepper said, giving Loki a stern look before turning to the guests and gesturing at the presents. “Guys, let me take those. What do you think of the decorations, Nat? Jane did them—she has a real flair, doesn’t she? Let’s go say hi to her.” She pointedly headed for the gift table where Jane was standing, and Natasha dutifully went along, leaving Loki to greet Steve.

Steve looked Loki square in the eye and shook his hand firmly. “It’s good to see you doing so well, Loki. I’m happy to be able to share this happy occasion with my friends.” He tipped his head forward, an eyebrow raised meaningfully. “All of them.”

Loki stared uncertainly for a moment, and then gave a deferential nod. “I appreciate that, Captain. I... don’t think I ever apologized for that unpleasant business in Germany.” He dropped his eyes. “You’re a decent man and a powerful warrior. I’m very glad to count you among my friends.”

Steve smiled. “Let’s not talk about stuff like that today. Like Miss Romanoff said, we’ve got something to celebrate, and I hear that Pepper made fancy sandwiches—let’s go have a look at that snack table.”

Loki started to accompany Steve, but JARVIS’ disembodied voice announced,“Mr. Stark, more guests have arrived.”

“Who?”

“Nick Fury and Agent Phil Coulson.”

Tony’s brow shot up in surprise. “Seriously? Okay. Send ‘em up, I’ll meet them at the elevator,” Tony said. He went to stand squarely in front of the doors, braced for whatever the SHIELD representatives might be planning to pull, but as the doors slid open, he saw both men were carrying gifts. He folded his arms over his chest, and gestured at the packages. “Hold up there, guys. This a trick?”

“It’s no trick,” Coulson said mildly. “Pepper invited us. It’d be rude to come without a present.”

“Yeah, Stark. Give me a break, I brought you a Diaper Genie.” Fury proffered a large gift bag to Tony, who took it with only a mildly suspicious frown. He poked around among the tissue paper and then gave Fury a grin.

“You’re a practical man, Director. Come on in.”

Tony saw the look on Loki’s face as he watched the men walk inside the room, and he hastened to stand beside him. “So, Loki—you remember Director Fury and Agent Coulson?”

“The names do strike a chord. Welcome, gentlemen,” Loki said gingerly.

“Here, Agent, let me take that.” Tony relieved Coulson of his gift-wrapped box. “Help yourselves to refreshments, and try not to arrest my boyfriend, okay?”

“Ha-ha. No worries, Stark. Loki, you’re looking well. How are you feeling?” Fury asked rather kindly. In following up on the role Loki had played when he did battle on Trondheim, Fury had learned just how big a favor he’d in fact done the Earth, and he felt positively benevolent towards the God of Mischief.

Loki visibly relaxed. “A bit off-square most of the time,” Loki said, running a hand over his belly. “My center of balance has shifted. Other than that, my complaints are quite mundane.” He then turned to Coulson. “And, how are you faring, Agent Coulson?” He spoke in a respectful tone.

A slow smile came over Coulson. “Wow, you sound genuinely concerned.”

Loki nodded. “I am. I’m afraid I wasn’t very gracious the last time we spoke. And, I never offered you a proper apology for—”

“I’m doing really well. And, I don’t dwell on the bad things, I just try to learn from them. So... let’s forget it.” He glanced at Loki’s stomach. “What I’d really like to do is find out more about your condition. I find it quite fascinating.”

Loki glanced down at himself. “I suppose it is. Well, it turns out I was born on Jotunheim, of Frost Giants, a species that features both male and female reproductive organs. However, I was unaware of this when Tony and I first began rutting, and—”

“How about we save the biology lesson for later, okay, sweetie?” Tony asked, hastily grabbing Loki’s arm and steering him toward the snack table. “We’ll have Phil over for dinner and do a Power Point—charts, diagrams, everything. Right now, I need to make sure you eat something, how about a watercress sandwich? Wait, what the hell is watercress—hey, Pepper! What’s this green shit you put on all these innocent little sandwiches? Is it edible?”

Pepper rolled her eyes and came to inspect the food. “For God’s sake, Tony, yes. It’s kind of like arugula, and it’s very nutritious, very good for a pregnant person. It’s also classy, so of course you wouldn’t know anything about it. I—”

A deep rumble rippled through the whole of Stark Tower, making the glass ladle chitter against the punch bowl. The furniture shivered and the walls vibrated for a few seconds, and everyone looked around for the source of the disturbance.

“What the hell—?” Fury snapped.

“It’s all right,” Loki said, but he looked a bit concerned. “I’m sure it’s just my brother, returning from Asgard. He normally doesn’t make quite so much racket, though...”

Everything quieted for a moment, and then Thor came striding through the door, beaming. He paused to take note of each new arrival and then his voice boomed out heartily. “Hello, my Midgardian friends! Allow me to introduce Loki’s and my friends and family from the grand realm of Asgard!”

Tony glanced at Loki and saw his startled expression; he looked as if he’d just swallowed his gum. Tony slid an arm around Loki’s waist and whispered, “Uh... I take it your mom didn’t show up alone.”

“Apparently not.” Loki shoved his hair back and steeled himself. Frigga came in just behind Thor, and he announced her to the group. “For those of you who have not yet met her, I present you the Allmother, Frigga, Queen of Asgard!” 

Frigga scanned the little crowd until she saw Loki, and a huge smile came over her. “Son! I’ve missed you so.” She held out her arms, and Loki quickly went to her and they tightly embraced. Before Loki released his hold on his mother, he heard Thor continue with the introductions.

“Now, we have the Warriors Three—Hogun, Fandral, and Volstagg! And, our beautiful Lady Warrior, Sif!”

Loki jerked back, blinking in shock. He looked at his mother. “They... they came?” he asked.

Frigga nodded. “Thor told me they were invited, and that they wanted to come. Is that not right?”

“N-no, it’s fine. I just never thought... I never thought they’d accept.”

“Loki, they were your friends, and they will be again. Go say hello.”

Loki closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He’d only included them in his invitation to prove to Thor that he had no one left in his old realm that cared for him besides his mother. How like them to agree to come, but only at Thor’s behest. He supposed he was about to be humiliated, just as he’d expected the mortals to do. Well, it was nothing he wasn’t used to.

He carried himself regally and went to stand before the four. “Hello, all. How wonderful to see you again.”

All four stopped and stared wide-eyed at Loki’s stomach. Finally, Sif said in amazement, “Loki! You’re huge! May I?” She looked at Loki, holding her hands over his tummy.

“Uh—well, yes, if you like.”

Sif laid her hands on Loki’s belly, and as if on command, the fetus kicked into a palm. Sif gasped. “Oh, my! That is astonishing. So powerful! Congratulations, Loki. I... I’m happy for you. 

“As am I,” Fandral said. He came up and wrapped his arms around Loki. Loki awkwardly patted him on the back. It had been ages since they’d committed certain delightful indiscretions together, but he didn’t particularly want to have to explain the nature of their past relationship to Tony if he could help it.

Volstagg stepped forward and gave Loki a full-body bear hug. “It’s good to see you, lad. I’m proud you’ve turned yourself around.”

“Yes, well. It’s good to see you, too.” Loki recovered from the embrace and turned to Hogun, who was regarding him with a piercing stare. They held each other’s gaze for a moment, and whatever Hogun was looking for, he must have found in Loki’s eyes. He gave a respectful bow. Loki returned it, and Hogun stepped back without a word.

“And now, the Lady Sigyn, of Asgard.” 

Loki was still marveling at the kind greetings from his one-time friends when the announcement of the latest guest shocked him like an electrode in the brain. He whirled to look, his mouth hanging open. Sigyn. He’d long ago learned to force the memory of her out of his mind, and now, here she was, standing before him in person. Sensing his emotional turmoil, Frigga came to his side, and Loki swept around to face her. “What’s she doing here?” he hissed.

“I invited her.”

_“Why?”_

Frigga put a gentle hand on Loki’s shoulder. “Oh, Loki. Ever since she heard you were expecting, she’s been moping around as if a bilgesnipe had taken up residence in her bed chamber. It occurred to me that perhaps you’d both left words unspoken; if this is so, you now have an opportunity to close those old doors and put things right. Do you not agree?”

Loki gave his mother a withering glare, but before he could respond, Sigyn glided toward him. Loki choked back his irritation and smiled.

“Sigyn—you are as lovely as the vision I hold in memory.” He lifted her hand and pressed it to his lips.

“Loki. You look just the same. Except, your hair is much longer, and your belly, much rounder.” A sad grin came over the lovely blonde woman, and Loki gave a rueful hmph. 

“Yes, well, that can happen as a result of parental lies and deception.” He shot a sneer at Frigga.

“Loki,” Frigga said disapprovingly. “This is a festive occasion. Let’s enjoy it.”

The evidence of Loki’s dark mood gradually faded, and he nodded. “Of course.” He stared at the floor for a moment as he controlled his breathing, and then he looked up with a forced smile. “Ladies, there are some Midgardian treats at table, and I’m starving—please, feel free to join me.” He turned and strode toward the snacks, only now two Asgardian servants were busy piling the tables high with proper food—roast boar and gravy, huge turkey legs, colorful vegetables, basket after basket of bread and rolls, and mead. Lots and lots of mead.

The Earth-folk were gaping at the spread, and as soon as the last dish was served, they hesitantly approached the table. Thor and the warriors were already filling up platters, laughing and talking amongst themselves.

Tony was doing his best to maintain at least the appearance of being in charge of his own home, but he noticed the expressions on his Midgardian guests, and decided he’d better step it up a notch. He chose Volstagg as his target and went up to him and offered his hand. “Hey, there! I’m Tony Stark, how are you?”

Volstagg had a great mouthful of meat and he smiled broadly around it. “I am in excellent spirits! How’d you do?” He threw back at least a half a tankard of mead before continuing. “I am exceedingly happy to meet the man that finally tamed our little trickster.” Volstaag narrowed an eye and leaned in conspiratorially. “How’d you do it, eh?”

“Uh—hey, listen, have you ever tried ‘watercress?’ I didn’t believe such a thing existed, but, here, give it a shot, it’s not bad.” He handed a teeny triangular morsel to the huge man, who stared at it, shrugged, and popped it in his mouth. He chewed for one nano second before swallowing, and nodded. “Most interesting! What is this doughy material that encases the greens?”

“I think it’s called enriched white bread. Nice, isn’t it? Doesn’t interfere with the taste of the algae at all. Oh, and who’s this?” Tony asked, hastily turning to Sif. 

Slowly, one-by-one, Tony made acquaintance with the entire Asgardian contingent, slyly bringing Pepper, Jane, and Bruce into the group, and before anyone knew it, the entire bizarre crowd was getting along beautifully, feasting, chatting, and laughing.

Eventually, Tony felt comfortable leaving them to themselves, and he turned to look for Loki. He didn’t know a whole lot about Loki’s life before he attacked Manhattan, but he got the feeling it hadn’t been particularly happy, and from the tales Thor told, these very people had been responsible for a certain amount of Loki’s insecurities and bad memories. So, he wanted to take him aside for a long hug and to remind him how much he, Tony, loved him.

But, Loki was nowhere to be found.


	42. The Scent of Memories

It was the pungent aroma of roast boar that did it.

Funny how smells could trigger a memory—open a door and transport a person through time, depositing him squarely in the middle of another day. Or year. Or life. 

This particular aroma took Loki back to a feast, one dedicated to the newly-named king of Asgard. To the moments before Frost Giants invaded, turning everything on its ear and changing his life forever. 

For a moment, he was there, in the great halls of his father’s, no, Odin’s palace, filled with resentment. Back then, he felt small and insignificant, always second, always lacking, nothing but a trickster in his father’s eyes. Well, he’d thought, he’d use the very talents his father scorned to bring his brother’s ego down to size, and do Asgard a favor in the process.

Which, in one way, he supposed he had.

But, everything that came after... He hadn’t realized at the time what he was throwing away. His mind hadn’t been working right, rational thought overshadowed by anger and his newly-triggered mind sickness. Now, seeing his former friends, smelling the scents of home, seeing his mother, seeing Sigyn—Gods, he knew. He knew exactly what he’d thrown away, what he could never reclaim. For a horrible moment, it made him sick.

He had to get out. He needed to be alone to let regret and shame wash over him in private, away from Tony. He’d only be hurt if Loki told him what was on his mind; he’d never understand that what Loki was feeling had nothing to do with him, or with the love and gratitude Loki felt for him and their baby, or his hopes for their future. No, this wave of emotion was about his own failures, and he needed a moment away from other people’s eyes.

So, Loki artfully slipped along the perimeter of the room and made it into the hallway without anyone taking notice. Ungainly as he was with his pregnant belly, he was still good at ninja-like disappearance, even without magic. Once he was in the hall, he straightened his shirt and smiled in satisfaction; his skills remained, enough to outwit both Midagardian and Aesir alike. 

He strode down to Tony’s office and silently closed the door behind him. He went to the window and looked out on the city, finding calm in the busyness going on below. He took a deep breath and drew on the techniques his mind-healer had taught him, centering himself and focusing on the positive things in his life, the good he’d done, the love he finally had. It helped, but still, memories rushed and tumbled through his mind. 

He’d been through so much, and he’d worked so hard to crush the sentiment in his heart that he rarely thought of the old times—his early crush on Sif; his later dalliance with Fandral. The fun of listening to Volstagg’s riotous stories around a camp fire. Afternoons spent sparring with Hogun, evenings spent drinking and laughing, yes, laughing, with Thor. 

Making love with Sigyn.

And, later, ruining himself in her eyes and being called a worthless cad, not fit to darken Sigyn’s doorstep ever again.

That particular memory caused a catch in his throat and he shut his eyes, seeing her in his mind as clearly as he had the day it happened. It had hurt then, and it hurt now, even though her response had been exactly what he’d deserved—and exactly what he’d intended. 

Just then, the door opened. 

He squeezed his eyes tighter. “Sigyn,” he said without opening them. Her delicate scent was unique; the graceful shift of her silken gown, unmistakeable. He composed himself and turned to face her. She smiled awkwardly.

“I’m sorry. I know you came here seeking solitude.” She went to stand by the couch, running a hand along the smooth leather. “I don’t blame you, you know. It must be difficult, seeing everyone, after...” She let the thought drop, and cleared her throat. “I’m sorry,” she repeated. “But, I was afraid I might not have another chance to speak to you alone... well, ever.”

“Oh, Sigyn. Why did you come here?” he asked wearily.

She crossed her arms, chafing herself as if she were cold, buying a moment before she spoke. “I have something to tell you.”

“And what is that?”

Sigyn drew in a breath. It was harder than she’d imagined, being in the same room with the man she’d loved, still loved. Her sweet, mischievous boy. She looked at him searchingly—ah, she thought, yes. He was still there, she could see him under the harsh planes of his face, swimming in the deep green of his eyes. A shot of electricity went through her as she remembered how it had felt to be in his arms, breathing in his scent. His lips on hers as he thrust inside her, his warm voice murmuring endearments as they moved together... She wouldn’t cry. She wouldn’t cry in front of Loki, no.

Loki of Asgard did not deserve her tears. But, her throat was on fire with pushing them back. 

“Oh, Loki,” she finally rasped. “The last time I saw you...” Loki could see her forcibly get a hold of herself before she continued. “...the last time I saw you, I was so angry. I should not have allowed my emotions to subjugate my reason, but I did, and I have suffered for it. Once I finally regained my senses, you were—lost to me. And, I have regretted it ever since.”

Loki rubbed a hand over his forehead. “You should not. When a woman catches her intended in the arms of another man, she has a right to send him away from her. Forever.”

Sigyn gave a rueful huff.“Ha! Fandral—what was he but a passing butterfly, alit on your shoulder? Did you really think your dalliance worthy of ending our love? No. But... my mother?” Sigyn’s eyes narrowed. “Insult on top of betrayal. How could you, Loki?”

“Insult?” Loki spread his arms apart entreatingly. “It was nothing of the sort. I was quite drunk, and she, like you, is quite beautiful by firelight. Having your grace and coloring, it was a natural mistake. I—”

Sigyn rolled her eyes. “Oh, am I not even worthy of one of your more intricate lies? Even now, you make no effort to appease me?”

Loki gave her a brittle smile. “And, what would be the point of that?”

“I, uh...” The lovely blonde stared past Loki, searching for words. Finally, she sighed. “How stupid I am... I still have hopes that we might share a future together.”

“What?” A dismayed look came over Loki as he stared. He sputtered through a few random syllables, and Sigyn raised her hand defensively. 

“Please, now that I’ve started, I might as well finish. Just listen.” Sigyn licked her lips, appearing to wish she could just disappear, but she continued, resolute. “You see, I’ve found a home with some distant relatives on Vanaheim. It is a pleasant realm, untroubled by the politics of Asgard, and you are not banned from there. I was thinking that you—you could come with me, Loki. We could start over, you and I, and with your child, we could become a real family.” 

With Loki still dumbstruck, Sigyn glided over to stand before him. “I never stopped loving you, you know, even as I despaired over you. And, while your mother tells me you’ve found happiness here with your mortal, I can’t help but think perhaps you’ve settled for something... Something less than your worth, something you feel is all you deserve. But, you are a god, Loki, you are Aesir, no matter what the circumstances of your birth may have been.” Sigyn carefully pressed forward until she could lay her head on Loki’s shoulder. “I’ve missed you every moment since we parted, love. Haven’t you? Surely you didn’t just forget me...We belong together, we were to be married, and if I hadn’t let my foolish pride overtake me, we could have—”

Loki’s mind finally cleared and a dark look crossed his face. He grasped her arms and pushed her back so he could look at her. “Stop.” Loki held her gaze, letting his eyes burn into her. Finally, he asked, “Did it ever strike you as strange that you found out about me and Fandral at all... much less your mother?”

Sigyn’s brow wrinkled. “What do you mean?”

“Do you really think if I’d meant to keep my dalliances from you, that you would have had even so much as an inkling? Ever?”

She didn’t answer, just kept staring into Loki’s eyes. He pursed his lips and then went on, an edge of cruelty in his voice.

“I thought after Fandral, you’d have ended things summarily. But, no. Your ridiculous loyalty steals your good sense—you took me back with little more than a word of reproof. That’s why I had to bed your mother, I knew that would be an outrage even you couldn’t look past. I—”

“Wait—you _wanted_ me to hate you?” she asked incredulously.

Loki shrugged. “I wanted you to leave me.”

“But, why?”

For a moment, Loki was tempted to crush her, once and for all. But, she stood before him, still so gentle, still so damnably trusting, and he softened. He took a deep breath. “Well. I was... filled with anger and disappointment about my brother taking the crown. Then, I learned the truth of my birth. Before long, my soul turned black, and I could feel myself slipping away as I began to work against Thor. But, even in my madness, I couldn’t bear to bring you down with me. I thought it better to—to cause you to put an end to things by your own hand. Before it was too late.”

Loki broke his gaze. “I had to leave you because I knew your love would blind you to the rotting of my heart, until I caused you pain beyond mere heartache. I’m so very sorry for hurting you, Sigyn, I am. But, knowing what I became, the things I did—wasn’t it for the best?” 

He looked up. “Was it not kinder, to let you end us on your own terms?” He studied her trembling lip, her blue eyes shadowed with hurt, and silence fell over them for a long moment.

“You trickster,” Sigyn said at last, a slow grin of admiration working its way to her lips. “You were protecting me. A hell of a way to go about it, but... Well.” She hastily wiped away tears with a silk handkerchief. “But, you are well again, I know this. Perhaps—”

“The madness has left me, yes, but I’m not the boy you once knew, and never will be again. You need to go on, my dear. Start again, find happiness with someone worthy of such a pure and passionate heart... I am not, if I ever was.” 

Sigyn stared at him, absorbing his words. At last, she nodded sadly. “So, I have made a fool of myself yet again, coming to you with my delusional offer.”

Loki gravely shook his head. “No. I don’t believe love is foolish. It takes great courage to... to try.” He thought of himself, turning up in Tony’s kitchen, in his living room, in his bed. He thought of Tony, saving him, saving him... He raised his eyes, a tiny smile pressed on his lips. “It takes courage, and it takes faith. Those are fine qualities to have, Sigyn. Be proud of them. Never call yourself a fool.” 

Sigyn started, her mouth open as if she were about to release a great torrent of words, but she swallowed and stood still. Finally, she said in as light a tone as she could manage, “And, you’re truly happy, you and your little mortal, here in this backwards land?”

“I am.” Loki went to stand in front of her. “Tony Stark is my match. I’ve found my place beside him. We’re different, yes, but in a strange way, we’re very much the same. He understands me...” He glanced down at his stomach. “I can’t say it wouldn’t have been nice to have someone else in the predicament of bearing my young,” he said with a wry chuckle. “But, you and I... I would have only brought you misery. Believe me—it’s better this way.”

Sigyn shifted uncomfortably, avoiding Loki’s eyes. “I will never believe that, but it doesn’t matter. I see the truth now. Thank you, I will leave you in peace.” She threw her head back, her mouth twisted in a crooked smile. “Come, let’s return to your party and celebrate a new life. Mine, included.” 

Loki lifted her hand and pressed it to his lips. “I hope the best for you in everything, you know. Truly.”

Sigyn nodded, and gestured toward the door. “Shall we?”

“You go ahead,” Loki said gently. “I’ll be there shortly.”

“All right.” She turned and went back to the shower in search of a tankard of mead so large that even Volstagg would struggle to down it completely.

**********

Loki gave Sigyn a head start while he took a moment to sort his thoughts. Until the moment he’d seen her in the living room, he’d been certain she’d never want to lay eyes on him again. It was a little disconcerting to find that she still cared for him; she’d been the one person besides his mother who’d loved him unconditionally, and it had taken a lot out of him to break her trust so completely. Knowing he’d managed to fail at even that was depressing. He sighed, and then strolled down the hall to the party.

As soon as he entered the room, a scowling Tony was upon him.

“Where the hell have you been, Houdini? I’ve been looking all over for you. And, who’s the blonde bombshell? Don’t tell me you were doing her on my office couch, ‘cause that’s totally not cool. I eat sandwiches there.” 

Loki gazed quizzically at Tony, his head cocked sideways in amusement. “Stark! Is that your jealousy face? Not so attractive as I had imagined it to be. Although, I’m quite pleased to discover you want my attention only for yourself.”

“Who. _Is._ She.”

“Oh, please. You don’t ask questions you don’t already know the answers to.”

“Yeah, fine—she was your girlfriend!”

“Umm, ex-fiancee, actually...”

Tony’s eyes widened. “Wait—you were going to get married?”

“Yes. We broke up before the announcement had been made, but yes.”

Tony soaked up that information for a moment, looking as if he was going to blow a gasket, but then his expression turned to one of sheer curiosity. “So, what happened, Romeo? You screw it up somehow?”

“Of course I did,” Loki said tiredly. “It’s ancient history, and I’d rather not go into it now.” He looked longingly toward the snack table. “Can’t we get some food? I’m very hungry.”

“Not until you tell me what you and Juliet were up to.”

“There was nothing nefarious about it. I just needed a breath of air. Seeing people who would have once cheerfully slit my throat gathered all in one room put me in bit of a mood.” He saw the annoyance on Tony’s face turn to concern, and he smiled. “I’m fine now, though. As for Sigyn, she wanted to... tie up some loose threads, I suppose. All that’s fine, too.” He took Tony’s arm. “Come, feed me, please. It’s so rude to faint at your own party.”

Tony stared at him, knowing he was getting nowhere near the complete story, but he realized that, since Loki wasn’t bothering to concoct an elaborate lie about it, it probably wasn’t that big a deal.

“Well, okay. I could use a nosh myself, although I think Pep’s trying to poison us with healthy snacks. Why don’t you talk me through the Asgardian munchies? Some of that stuff looks great, but I can’t identify it. Might not sit well with the ol’ Midgardian constitution, you know?”

Loki laughed affectionately as he led the way to the considerably reduced piles of food on the snack table and they helped each other navigate through the selections. They then found a place on the couch to sit and eat, and slowly, the guests began to mingle, taking time to chat jovially with Loki, letting him know he was no longer regarded as an evil villain, not even by the SHIELD agents.

But, as Loki watched Sigyn stand silently by the window, he wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to regard himself as anything but.


	43. So Many Gifts!

_Twenty minutes earlier…_

Pepper was too busy worrying about the food table collapsing under the weight of the Asgardian meal offerings to notice when Loki slipped out of the room. But after several moments of Tony talking, not to her, but around her, his eyes sweeping the group back and forth like a radar detector, it occurred to her that he was looking for someone. Given the current Tony situation, she correctly deduced that that someone must be Loki. 

“What’s wrong?” she asked sharply, in a futile attempt to get Tony to actually look her in the eye.

“Nothing. Nothing. Why? Nothing,” Tony answered distractedly. Volstagg was now standing to his right, and Tony’s brow furrowed as he craned his neck in order to see around the man’s substantial bulk. 

Pepper sighed.

“You seem to be missing one pregnant god. Did you two have a fight?”

“No! It’s not that. It’s just... I can’t find him, and I can’t find that blonde Tinker Bell-type who was mooning over him, either.” Tony curled his lip into a bitter snarl. “Point Break told me the two of them used to go out. Or, ‘they shared a chaste, but heartfelt, attraction to one another,’ as he put it. ‘Chaste,’ yeah, right. Has he met his brother?”

Pepper chuckled. “And you think they’ve gone off to rekindle their outer space romance in a closet somewhere? With the size of Loki’s tummy? I think that’s anatomically impossible at this point.”

Tony shot her a scornful sneer. “Yeah, um, no, trust me, it’s not. Fucker’s hung like a horse,” he muttered as an aside. 

Delicately ignoring the remark, Pepper continued. “So, go look for him. I’ll hold down the fort here. In fact, you should go find him, because we need to get this show on the road. We’ve got to get through that mound of presents, serve cake, and then send everybody on their way. Which might be a challenge, because some of your in-laws are already tanked up like a bunch of soccer hooligans.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll—whoa, there he is. Later, Pep.” Tony took off and left Pepper to catch the empty tray dropped by a weaving Thor after he threw the last of the petit fours into his mouth.

******

Pepper kept a close eye on Tony and Loki’s exchange, ready to step in and diffuse the situation (read: use a serving fork to threaten the crap out of them) should harsh words bubble up, but to her surprise, they ended up smiling stupidly at each other and heading for the snack table arm in arm. “What the hell,” she thought, shaking her head. She didn’t know what they’d said to each other, but she had a pretty good idea of what Tony had opened with, and if it had been her and Tony having that sort of conversation, well... there’d be blood dripping off a chandelier by now. 

_Could it be that Loki was actually good for Tony?_

She shrugged and focused on politely suggesting people find seats before finally announcing, “Okay, everyone, Gift Time! Loki, are you comfortable on the couch? We could get you a chair—”

Thor was snickering goofily at something Bruce had said, but he came to full alertness at Pepper’s words. “Wait! Stop the proceedings!” He strode into the middle of the room and grabbed Fandral by the arm. “We have something for you, Loki—stay where you are until we return.” With that, the two Aesir hustled out, and everyone stared after them curiously.

Except for Loki. His expression was all too knowing. Tony, sitting next to him, heard him sigh resignedly, and something suddenly occurred to him—Loki was preparing himself for humiliation.

It made sense. Ever since Loki had heard about the shower, there’d been tension in him that Tony didn’t entirely understand. But, this must have been it—while Thor had been nothing but kind to his little brother, it wouldn’t surprise Tony if the thunder god had some dick-ish practical joke ready to pull here in front of everyone Loki had ever known. Obviously, Loki had been braced for some shit all along, and now it looked like it was going to happen. Tony began mulling over ideas of what it could be.

He slipped an arm around Loki’s shoulders and said in his ear, “Hey, it’s okay. Probably some Asgardian werewolf cub they think it’d be cool to watch grow up alongside the baby—”

Loki’s morose expression gave way to a rueful grin. “Werewolves are mythical beasts. I wouldn’t put it past him to have found an infant bilgesnipe, though, now that you mention it.”

Tony heard the men returning, huffing and arguing as they apparently struggled to carry whatever it was they were bringing. Shit, maybe it _was_ a bilgesnipe, Tony thought, whatever the hell that was. He felt Loki stiffen, and he gave his shoulders a tight squeeze. “It’s okay,” he said again.

Thor and Fandral carried in a large cloth-covered object of irregular shape, which was, thankfully, not moving on its own. It was evidently heavy though, and Thor bore most of the burden, as he irritably proclaimed when they paused to decide where to put it. “Over there, by the gift table,” Pepper hastily directed. They wrangled the thing into place, and, turning to face the party guests, Thor whipped away the cover with a flourish.

Everyone was silent as they absorbed what they were seeing.

A rocking chair.

And, it was beautiful. All wood, arms carved into rather benevolent looking snakes, with a kindly wolf head adorning the top. It was somewhat larger than average, perhaps to accommodate Loki’s long, lanky frame. Loki rose and walked over to examine it more closely. 

“This... This is for me?”

“Of course, brother!” Thor asserted, beaming. “I constructed it myself!”

“With my help,” Fandral added dryly. 

Thor shrugged dismissively. “Eh, he did the carving.”

Loki reached out a hand and ran his fingers over the ornate woodwork. “It must have taken many days to complete.” He looked at Fandral. “You did this for me?” he asked. 

Fandral nodded. “Of course. It was my pleasure.” There was a slight catch in his voice as he added, “I... I want you to be happy, Loki.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “So, did you, in fact, fuck everybody in Asgard?” he hissed into Loki’s ear.

“No!” Loki hissed back. “After all, Volstagg is _married!”_ He gave Tony a mischievous wink and went back to admiring the chair. “Thor, Fandral—it’s magnificent. I’m beyond words. Thank you.”

“We hope you’ll obtain much pleasure from the use of it,” Thor said heartily.

“I’m certain I will. It’s wonderful.” Loki suddenly frowned. “But, Fandral? What are these holes in the arms for?”

“I believe they’re called ‘cup holders,’” Fandral answered grandly. “I learned about them in a periodical I picked up whilst here in the mortal realm. You remember, I and the other warriors had come here to rescue Thor from...” Fandral stumbled on the words as he caught the look in Loki’s eye and stuttered to a halt. He quickly cleared his throat. “Ahem. That is to say, apparently, cup holders are a highly prized feature in Midgardian conveyance machines, so I thought, why not?” He gave a pathetically self-aware chuckle, paused and added lamely, “I imagine they’ll come in handy at some point.”

“How clever,” Loki said flatly. Vivid memories of sending the Destroyer to kill Thor washed over him, and he thought he saw a glance, a dangerous glance, pass between his brother and the other warriors, and what if they had a plan, a plan for vengeance, and what if the chair was imbued with evil, what if they’d cursed it, and—

“Well? Go ahead, Loki, try it out,” Thor said, patting the chair seat with enthusiasm.

Thor’s words cut into Loki’s growing alarm, but only served to affirm it. He stood unmoving, and now everyone was staring expectantly at him.

“It’s all right, dear,” Frigga said in Loki’s mind. She clearly understood what he was thinking, and she put a hand on his arm to reassure him. 

Loki looked into her eyes, and the moment of dread passed. He slowly turned and sat down in the rocker as if it were a throne. His senses were still on high alert though, and just as he’d expected, there was a low current of magic running through the chair. But it was gentle and benevolent, and he sensed that there was nothing dangerous in it at all. 

After a moment, he relaxed and sat back with an appreciative hum. “It’s very comfortable. And... calming.” 

Thor nodded. “Mother placed a serenity spell upon it. Whenever you’re holding your child, all stressful thoughts will fade into the background and you’ll be left with only peace and good spirits surrounding you.”

Loki gave a half-grin. “It’s working already.” He turned his head and held a hand out to his mother. “How well you know me,” he said softly.

Frigga gripped his hand. “Of course I do, love. You’re my son.” 

Loki settled back. He felt the last bit of suspicion and fear fizzle away, and he lovingly patted his stomach. “I look forward to rocking you in this, little one. Surely it will help send you into restful slumber.” He closed his eyes and rocked back and forth contentedly.

“Damn, freakin’ chair works better than Xanax,” Tony noted. “I may have to tie him to it until the baby comes.”

A few appreciative titters went through the crowd, and Pepper nodded briskly. “Yeah, yeah, ha ha, that’s great. Now, how about we open another gift?” She chose one from the stack on the table and placed it on what little room was available on Loki’s lap. He roused himself and read the card out loud. “Ah, from Natasha... and Clint.” He raised an eyebrow. Clint Barton was the one Avenger who still hadn’t at least superficially come to terms with Loki, and another bout of mistrust shot through him. He cast a sharp look at Natasha. “I can’t help but notice that the archer isn’t present.”

Natasha shrugged. “He said he can’t stand the sight of you, but he didn’t want to take it out on the baby. Go ahead, open it. It’s not rigged.”

Loki still looked a little wary, but he cautiously tore away the wrapping paper and opened the box within, giving a soft smile of surprise at its contents. “Oh—well, this is marvelous. All sorts of useful things...” He held up several of the items—baby bath products, a tiny brush and comb, soft blankets with bunnies and kittens on them. He gave a deferential nod toward Natasha. “Thank you, Ms. Romanoff. Thanks to both of you.” Loki’s paused to consider his next words. “It was very kind of Barton to set aside his ill feelings. I’m sure it was’t easy. Please convey my appreciation.”

“I will.” Natasha smiled. “Listen, he had fun shopping with me. I have a feeling he’s going to be a total sucker for the baby.”

“Of course he will, everyone will love this baby,” Loki said proudly, suddenly feeling a surge of happiness.

Tony could tell Loki was feeling better, and he took the opportunity to razz him just a little. “Or else, right, babe?” he asked with a grin.

Loki actually laughed, cheerfully pulling on his most regal persona. “Shush, mortal. Hand me another present. I quite like being feted this way.”

And, just like that, the mood of the whole room was lightened.

********

Jane kept a list of who gave what as Loki went through the pile. Gift bags and wrapped boxes filled with stuffed animals, toys, baby clothes, diapers, all sorts of infant care supplies and gadgets were gifts from the Midgardian crowd. Loki curiously examined each one and thanked the giver profusely, until he went through them all.

That left a few oddly packaged items. There were three ornately carved wooden boxes, one each from Hogun, Volstagg, and Sif. As Loki opened them, he found each contained a child-sized training weapon—a sword, a dagger, and an archery set. 

Loki studied each item thoroughly and then made a sound of deep admiration before proclaiming, “These are exquisite! The sword is perfectly balanced, and the dagger—” Loki looked up suddenly. “Are these dwarf-made?”

“Of course,” Sif said proudly. “We’re very proud of you, Loki. Only the best would do.”

Loki blinked uncertainly. Thor, Fandral, Hogan, and Volstagg were standing behind Sif, all smiling at Loki, and he looked at each one in turn. “You’re... proud of me?”

“We know what you did on Trondheim,” Volstagg said. “You were a most brave and valiant warrior.”

“And we know how you’ve struggled to heal from madness,” Hogan said.

“You saved that woman at SHIELD,” Thor said. “And, you’ve brought joy to my friend,” he continued, gesturing at Tony. “You’re giving me a niece or nephew, and, best of all—I have a brother again.” Thor went to Loki’s side, bent down, and hugged him. “Of course we’re proud of you.”

Loki closed his eyes and bit his lip, keeping tears stifled, but everyone could see he was deeply touched. Tony stood awkwardly for a moment, and then hastily began gathering up the pint-sized weapons. “How about we put these away until the little nipper is old enough to know not to kill someone with them, huh?” he explained as he placed them on a shelf behind the bar. 

“But, they’re so beautiful,” Loki protested. “I want him or her to grow up looking at them, until the day they’re old enough to use them.”

“All right, I’ll have a special glass case made for ‘em. With a lock.”

Loki nodded agreeably, grinning a little. If his child had even a fraction of the seidr he had, a lock fashioned by mortals would offer nothing more than a good learning opportunity.

“Moving on,” Pepper said firmly. There were only two more gifts, one wrapped in a glimmering white silk cloth, the other in some sort of animal skin. She handed the silken one to Loki.

He smiled instantly. “This is from you, Mother,” he said.

“It is.” Frigga came to stand beside him, running her hand over his raven hair in a sweet caress. “Open it, dear.”

Loki carefully untied the lace ribbon holding the package together, and found inside an array of beautifully hand-made baby clothes. Tiny mittens, a cap, a little sweater, booties, shirts, nightgowns, all either knit or sewn with delicate precision, all soft and cozy, but with a look befitting Asgardian royalty.

“Oh, Mother...” Loki said softly as he held up each piece. “You made all these yourself.”

“Yes. It kept me busy. And, I’ve already started on larger sizes. I also have some blankets and crib sheets, but I’ll bring those when the baby comes.”

“Thank you.” Loki wrapped his arms around Frigga and hugged her tightly.

Pepper watched somewhat impatiently, wanting to move things along before Thor got too loaded to take his contingent back to Asgard. “One more, everyone! Here you go, Loki!” Pepper reached for the hide-covered package, not noticing Frigga’s eyes widening.

“Stop!” Frigga cried. She reached out and grabbed Pepper’s hand, pulling her away from the gift table.

“What? What’s wrong?” Pepper asked, startled.

Loki instantly understood. “I suspect it would be better for you not to touch that one.” He glanced around, a frown on his face. “Who put it there?”

Thor’s mead-fueled good spirits faded, and he stepped forward guiltily. “I’m afraid I did, brother. I’m so sorry, I forgot the effect it could have on Midgardians.”

Loki picked up the package and his hands instantly flushed blue before returning to their normal color. He pursed his lips for a moment and then turned to his mother. “She sent this?”

Frigga nodded regretfully, and Loki gave a stormy scowl.

“Why? Why would she purposely endanger my friends?” Even in a surge of anger, Loki was aware how strange it sounded for him to refer to “his friends.” But it felt good and natural to be able to say it at last.

Frigga patted his arm soothingly. “She didn’t mean harm. I think she believed the animal hide would abate the danger. I intended to test it before allowing it to be placed with the other things, but in all the excitement...”

Jane was staring with a puzzled look on her face. She nudged Thor. “What are they talking about?”

“Loki’s birth mother, Farbauti, is a Frost Giant, remember? This item has properties which could freeze a mortal’s flesh to the bone if it came into contact with it. It was a grave error to allow it to be placed with the other gifts, and I bear responsibility.” He shook his head shamefully, and to everyone’s surprise, Loki stood up, put the package on the chair, and went to Thor.

“It’s all right, Brother. It was a simple mistake, and no damage done. Remember this for the future, but now, please, let’s forget about it and enjoy the party.”

Thor looked into Loki’s calm green eyes, awed. As a child, Loki had been gentle and good-natured, quick to anger, but quick to forgive as well. It had been ages since Thor had seen that side of him, and it filled his heart to hear genuine kindness coming from Loki and directed at him, of all people. He smushed Loki to his chest. 

“My brother,” he said softly.

“Yes, well,” Loki voice was muffled as he squirmed out of Thor’s embrace. “Now, let’s see what treasure comes to us from the lovely realm of Jotunheim.” He picked up the gift and sat back down. He untied the strips of leather holding the animal skin wrapping closed and revealed what appeared to be a plain block of ice. It was completely solid, not having melted even a drop in spite of the warm temperature of the penthouse.

“Okay, that’s weird for a lot of reasons,” Tony said. “Who gives ice as a present? I mean, shit, we’ve got a machine that makes the stuff right in our fridge, you’d think—”

“Quiet, Stark. The gift isn’t the ice. It’s what’s contained within it.” To nearly everyone’s shock, Loki took on his Jotun form, and a collective gasp went through the crowd. “Could someone bring me a container of some sort?” Loki asked.

Bruce hurried off to the kitchen and returned with a mixing bowl. Loki took it, careful not to touch Bruce’s flesh. He nodded his thanks, and held the ice over the bowl. He closed his eyes and seemed to focus his full attention on the block gripped between his hands. After a moment, the ice began to drip, slowly at first, but then faster and faster until it had all flowed into the bowl, leaving a thin silver chain with a spiky pendant in Loki’s palm. A fleck of blue glittered from the pendant.

“What is it?” Pepper asked.

Frigga shifted uncomfortably. “I’m afraid I’m not sure. Farbauti only said it is a precious family heirloom and that Loki must be very careful with it. She promised to tell him more about it after the baby’s arrival, if she is invited for a visit.”

Loki grinned admiringly. “I can see where I get my devious nature from,” he said with a chuckle. He placed the pendant in the water, and weirdly, the liquid immediately began to turn into ice, quickly encasing the jewelry. Loki wrapped the entire thing in the animal skin and secured it with the leather. “Tony, where can I put this that no mortal comes in contact with it? Or anyone else, for that matter.” 

“Uh, well... There’s a safe I don’t use anymore down in the lab. Here, I can—”

“You can’t touch it, love.”

“I’ll take it,” Frigga said. “If you’ll escort me, Tony?”

“Sure, of course. We’ll be right back, guys. Don’t cut the cake without me.”

Loki returned to his Aesir appearance, and at that everyone relaxed. Soon the room was again rumbling with laughter and conversation. 

Loki looked down at his hands. They were still thrumming with the magic contained within the pendant.


	44. Chapter 44

Tony strode a few yards down the hall, briskly heading for the elevator that would take him and Frigga down to the lab. Then it struck him that he was probably being rude, walking ahead of a queen—he wasn’t sure, but it seemed like one of those things a commoner ought not to do, on pain of being kicked out of the palace, or stretched on a rack or something. But, what the hell was a guy supposed to do when the queen had no idea where she was going? Tony stumbled to a halt and turned to smile brightly at Frigga. 

She smiled back, and she didn’t appear annoyed or rack-stretchy. But Tony was determined not to do anything uncouth, so he adopted a kind of hitching half-step, in which he could walk beside the Allmother while still guiding her along the way. It worked, but it felt damn awkward. It was a walk good only for carrying on a conversation. 

Which they weren’t.

This was the first time they’d been alone together without a crisis hanging over their heads, and Tony had no idea what to say to the woman who was, for all intents and purposes, his mother-in-law. 

His magical, ruler-from-another-planet-mother-in-law, to be precise. Damn, that’s a lot of hyphens, he was musing, when Frigga asked, “Tony? Are you all right?”

“Oh! Uh, yeah. I mean—Yes, ma’am, I’m fine. I mean, I’m fine, Your Highness. Sorry.” 

Frigga chuckled. “You’re still uncomfortable around me.”

Tony inhaled deeply in preparation for assuring her that he was, too, comfortable around her, but he just ended up laughing at himself. “No, ma’am, I’m afraid I’m not. I just...” He slowed down, frowning as he tried to find the right words. “It’s not so much that you’re royalty—I’ve met plenty of kings and presidents and dictators, and I pretty much know not to do anything too stupid around them. It’s not even that you’re, you know, a sorceress and could turn me into a horsefly if I got on your nerves.”

Another soft laugh. “What is it, then?” 

Tony noted Frigga didn’t dispute that last statement, but she was being kind, so he trundled on. “It’s just that...” He came to a complete stop and turned to look Frigga in the eye. “I just don’t want to embarrass Loki. I mean, you’re his mom, and I really want you to like me, but even more than that—I never want to make him feel like he has to apologize for me being a total dumbass.” Tony paused, and added, “Which, saying ‘dumbass’ probably qualifies me for. I’m sorry about that, too.”

Now, Frigga laughed out loud.

“Oh, Tony. Please stop worrying. I don’t expect you, or any of your mortal friends, to know the etiquette of Asgard’s royalty. I very much appreciate your deference, but I honestly hope that someday you’ll feel as comfortable speaking with me as you do with your own family.” She put a hand on Tony’s shoulder. “And, the fact is, you can do no wrong in my eyes. You love my son, and he loves you. It’s something I’ve long hoped for him, and had come to fear would never—could never—happen.” Her smile glimmered, and then she added, “Now, please relax and lead the way. _I_ certainly have no idea where we’re going.”

Tony gave a huge exhalation of relief and started walking at a normal pace. They reached the elevator, got in, and began the slow descent to Tony’s lab. “Well, uh... So, you’re excited about having a grandkid?” he asked, just to keep the conversation going.

“Oh, you have no idea. Another thing I was beginning to think would never happen. I had hopes for Thor, of course, but now he hardly appears to be in any hurry to settle down. And, Loki... Well, when he was younger, he was so charming, I expected some poor maiden to come up pregnant at any given moment, but it didn’t happen. And then, after everything that came later...” Frigga sighed. “Well, let’s just say this was all a wonderful surprise.”

The elevator came to its destination, the doors slid open with a soft whoosh, and Tony led Frigga to the lab entrance. He punched in a code and the heavy steel door rolled open. He took Frigga to the far back area and pulled down an aged white board hung on the wall. Behind it was an old safe. He spun the combination lock until the door sprang open, and then he stepped aside. “Okay, here you go.”

Frigga peered inside. “Are you sure there’s nothing in here you’ll need?”

“Nah, I used to keep formulas and stuff in there, but I’ve got higher-tech resources now. The last thing I kept in there was a ham sandwich... That didn’t end well, by the way. No, I don’t need it, and it’s completely empty, so please, go ahead.”

“All right.” Frigga slid the hide-wrapped package into the safe and watched as Tony closed the door and spun the lock again. 

“There. About as secure as you can get without heavy explosives. Or a professional safecracker.”

Frigga nodded, but frowned thoughtfully. “Mm. Does anyone else know the code for entry?”

“The combination? Uh-uh, I don’t think so... Well, Pepper. She has records of all that kind of stuff in case I bite it. Umm... My pal, Rhodey. He used to keep all kinds of weird stuff in there. Oh, and there was this girl who—”

“I see.” Frigga stepped forward. She placed her hand on the lock for a moment, and then traced the outside of the safe door with a finger. Tony saw tiny silver sparks erupt every so often. 

“Uh... What’s that for?” he asked.

Frigga bit her lower lip. “Well... Until we learn the exact properties of the pendant, I’d rather not take any chances on it falling into the wrong hands. Now, only you and Loki will be able to open the safe, once you’ve given him the entry numbers.” 

A puzzled frown crossed Tony’s face. “Are you saying the pendant itself could be dangerous?”

Frigga shrugged elegantly. “It’s possible. I haven’t had a chance to examine it, and even if I did, the Jotunn have ways not known outside their culture. I really hope Loki will leave it be until after meeting with Farbauti.”

“Huh. You know, I’m kind of surprised you didn’t pin her down on that before bringing it here. I mean, the US Department of Agriculture tries not to let people bring unknown stuff into the country, in case it kills bees or takes over farmland or what-have-you.”

“Very wise.”

“Yeah, well, you guys kind of bypassed that, what with the space travel and all.”

“Ah, yes. Apologies,” she said with a twinkle. “But, as I’m sure you know, politics sometimes take precedence over good sense.”

“Politics?”

“Yes, relations between Asgard and Jotunheim are better than they’ve ever been, but there’s still a long way to go. I didn’t want to imply mistrust of Farbauti when she was simply sending along a gift.”

“All I know about politics is, ‘Don’t trust anybody.’”

“Indeed.” Frigga looked down at the floor and sighed, and then met Tony’s gaze. “Would you send me a message via Thor if Loki asks for the pendant?”

Tony’s eyes narrowed. “Why?”

“I’d just like to know... if he finds any use for it.”

That sounded a little more ominous than Tony liked, but he remembered Loki’s internal struggle with the Tessaract diamond. God, he hoped this thing wasn’t like that. If it was, he’d probably end up in deep shit before he knew it, and in desperate need of Frigga’s advice anyway, if he lived long enough to ask for it. He nodded. “Okay. I will. Assuming he hasn’t leveled all of New York with it by then.”

A rueful smile tugged at Frigga’s lips. “My dear, if he’s in a state of mind to do that, he won’t bother asking for the combination.” She gave him a pat on the arm, and gestured toward the exit. “Shall we return to the festivities?”

“Yes, ma’am, I’d love to. I really need cake.”

“As do I.”

“And, booze,” Tony added with a straight face.

“As do I,” Frigga answered solemnly. Then, she grinned, straightened to her full royal height and indicated Tony should guide her back to the party.

******

When Tony entered the living room, he saw a resigned-looking Loki sitting on the couch next to Thor, his chin propped on his hand. In an inebriated show of fraternal affection, Thor had an arm slung around Loki and was gleefully regaling the party guests with some tale which apparently featured an escapade from Loki’s youth. 

Tony edged closer and heard, “...and, there he was, standing with his hands on his hips right in front of everyone! Sooo arrogant, like the bloody cock-of-the-walk, ready to be taken down a peg!”

The locals were laughing, the Asgardians were hooting, and a flush of anger rose in Tony’s throat. He started to say something, but Thor continued. “...And then Loki said to him, very quietly, ‘Is that so?’ So smooth, so elegant! And, he raised and lowered his hand, just the slightest bit, like this...” Thor demonstrated Loki’s hand gesture. “And, bam! The mage’s trousers dropped to his ankles, and he was left standing there, naked from the waist down, in front of his wife, the Allfather and everyone!” Thor proudly clapped Loki on the back, everyone laughed even more heartily, and Loki’s lips twisted into a sly grin. 

“Well, I’m sorry, but I can’t bear hypocrisy. If he felt the need to call me down before the the entire town, he should have waited until he no longer had his mistress’s lip paint smeared on his nether regions.”

“Agreed, Brother, agreed!” Thor gave his brother a fond kiss on the temple, and Loki chuckled. He looked up to see Tony watching. It kind of made Tony’s day to see that Loki’s eyes lit up at the sight of him.

“Tony! Come, sit with me. Thor’s reminiscing while drunk on his ass, and it’s quite entertaining.” Loki patted the sliver of couch that was available, given that Thor was half-lolling on the rest of it. Tony headed over, and Loki gave Thor a sharp jab in the solar plexus with his elbow. “Move over, you enormous git. I want to sit with my mate.”

Thor chortled noisily, and scooted to the other end of the couch while at the same time grabbing Tony’s arm and yanking him down to sit between himself and Loki. “My new brother!” Thor said happily, scrunching Tony to him. Then, his face fell. “Oh, Loki... We went so long bearing a rift between us...” he said sorrowfully. But then he brightened. “Yet, we are healed, and not only that, but you have given me a NEW brother! I went from no brother at all to having TWO! This is... magnificent!” Joyful tears leaked out of Thor’s eyes and dribbled onto the top of Tony’s head. “Y-you’ve made me so happy!”

Loki snorted in exasperation. “Well, that’s what I strive for. Norns, Thor, let Tony go. Let him go, he can’t breathe. Damnation, the mead has you acting the fool even more so than usual.” Loki managed to wrangle Tony out from under Thor’s meaty arm and he gave his lover a beleaguered once-over as one would a half-drowned puppy. He shot a frown at Thor as he smoothed Tony’s tousled hair. “Please, try to contain your idiocy until you’re back on Asgard.”

“My boys,” Frigga said fondly. “This is just like the old days.”

“Yeah, can’t believe I’m just now getting in on this,” Tony said, wiping something wet and Thor-related from his eye—tears, sweat, he wasn’t sure. Being under Thor’s mighty arm was a damp experience. He turned to look at Loki and quietly asked, “Are you all right?”

“Yes. Surprisingly, all is well.” Loki smiled, and Tony could see he was being honest. Suddenly, a little Thor-slime didn’t seem like such a bad thing.

“Hey, guys—are we ready for cake?” Pepper asked, not really caring what the answer was. Bruce wheeled out a cart bearing a large sheet cake decorated in a cute jungle scene with the words, “Loki and Tony—Happy Baby!” in bright green icing. Jane and Pepper worked together to cut and serve pieces to everyone, making sure Volstagg got a couple extra, and Bruce managed to discretely ditch the mead and refill the non-alcoholic punch before Fandral began lifting a glass in honor of the parents-to-be. 

Everyone milled around, eating and chatting until Fury and Coulson quietly bid goodbye to Tony and Loki, thanked Pepper for the hospitality, and then slipped out. It was possible they’d come with the intention of gathering intel on the alien visitors, but at this point, they had little more than a broadened understanding of just how much alcohol the Asgardians could consume without falling down. Hardly worth the toner it would take to print the report.

Natasha was the next to depart. She had a foil-covered plate in her hand and announced, “Hey, everyone, this was great. I’m taking Clint some cake, hope that’s all right. Congrats, guys, I’m out of here.” The door was closed behind her before anyone had the presence of mind to say goodbye.

After a bit more socializing, Frigga stood up. “Thor, my love—it saddens me to say it, but the Aesir must return to Asgard now.” She lay a hand on the side of Thor’s face, and he blinked a few times before straightening up, apparently sobered up enough to be trusted with space travel. “Yes, Mother, of course.” He had an aggrieved look on his face as he turned to Jane and gathered her into his arms. “I will return soon, my darling,” he whispered into her ear. He gave her a barely-restrained kiss, and then his voice boomed, “Come, my fellows! We must depart. Accompany me to the open air of the tower roof so that we may take to the sky and return to our realm.”

Loki rolled his eyes yet again and whispered to Tony, “Would it kill him to just say, ‘Let’s go?’” Tony snickered appreciatively. They watched as Thor trudged out of the living area, and then were busy as each of the rest of the alien guests took a moment to say goodbye and best wishes, heartily shaking hands with Tony, and giving Loki bone-breaking hugs. 

Frigga was the last to leave, and she slipped her arm through Loki’s. “Come up with us, dear, and bid us goodbye outside. I don’t want to squander a moment of our time together.”

“All right, Mother,” Loki said. “Tony, you come, too.”

“Sure. It’s not every day I get to see people zip off into the stratosphere without a space ship.”

******

The Asgardian contingent stood gathered in a knot on the roof, with Thor in the middle. He announced to Heimdall that they were ready to go, and then he raised Mjolnir high. With a sharp clap of thunder, a space in the clouds cleared for them, and the entire group swooshed upward toward the heavens.

Which was weird, but impressive.

Tony watched their ascent, wondering if, after the baby was born, Loki would, or could, take him on a space jaunt like that. That would be extremely cool, and would definitely make having an outer space boyfriend _totally_ worth whatever oddball situations he found himself in as a result. He looked over to ask Loki about it, but stopped when he saw the look on Loki’s lovely upturned face.

Aw, shit. 

One of the things the shallow part of Tony’s mind loved most about Loki, besides his cute ass and gorgeous body, was how expressive his face was. Yeah, Loki could lie and control the use his eyes and mouth to convince just about anyone he was telling the truth, but Tony’d had enough time to observe him undetected that he could spot his subtle little tells, like when one eyebrow was just a fraction of an inch higher than the other, or when he thinned out his lips a tad more than normal. Loki had a huge range of facial expressions, mostly on the rage-to-ecstasy scale, although sad and ashamed had snuck in there a time or two as well. And, Tony had quietly gone about the business of cataloging every single one of them. But now, Loki was sporting one expression Tony couldn’t recall having seen before—wistfulness.

_Wistful?_ Loki? 

Again—aw, shit. Here he was, fantasizing about casually careening around the galaxy like an Asgardian noob, when Loki’s former best friends (and, apparently, ex-best-friends-with-benefits) had just given him forgiveness, renewed their acceptance of him, and then levitated out of his life, probably forever. 

That had to be a stab in the heart.

Tony stood there, watching Loki watch the ever-diminishing dot fade into the sky, noting how regally Loki held himself—well, as regal as it’s possible to be when you look like you’ve got a basketball stashed under your shirt. Still, Loki’s ebony hair danced in the wind, his shoulders were squared, and he stood with his arms crossed over said basketball, staring heaven-ward with dry eyes and his jaw set, not letting himself give in to emotion.

But, Tony could read that quirk of brow like a dictionary.

“Hey, kiddo. How’re you doing?” he asked, sliding his arm firmly around Loki’s waist.

Loki started, appeared to shake himself out of a reverie, and then made to head back inside, not meeting Tony’s eye. “I’m very well, thank you. Come, we should make sure your man in the walls is giving Pepper and the others a hand in cleaning up. After all they’ve done, they must be exhausted, and—”

“Just a minute.” Tony turned Loki to face him and cupped his face in his hands. “I want to know what that look was all about.”

Loki gave him a puzzled frown. “What ‘look?’”

“The look that said you wished you could go with them.” There, he said it. Yeah, it used to be true, Tony Stark didn’t do emotions, but Loki changed that. He changed a lot of things. No more would Tony let him slip away with his soul hurting, let him shove the pain back into a dark corner to fester—not on Tony’s watch. They were going to talk about it, dammit, talk about Loki’s _feelings,_ right here and now, while it was warm and fresh, before he could let the ice build up and freeze his lover out. 

Tony watched Loki’s face expectantly.

Loki’s green eyes went huge for a moment. He seemed to be fighting back tears, and he stared hopelessly at Tony, as if left utterly bereft. Tony felt his own eyes preparing to water, and Loki trailed a trembling hand down the side of Tony’s face in commiseration...

And then, the fucker laughed.

“Oh, Tony, you are sweet,” he said, chortling. “How precious, you think I’m homesick! Aw, come here.” Gleefully, he swept Tony into his arms and squeezed him tight.

“Aren’t you?” Tony asked around Loki’s shoulder.

“No, love. Apart from my mother, I have no use for any of those people.” He let go of Tony and one side of his mouth turned up into a wry grin. “It was just, listening to Thor’s tales—I’ve forgotten so much. How close we all used to be, how much fun we had together. Once, we were warriors. Adventurers, conspirators. And, even before that, we were dreadful little children. Absolute terrors.” Loki chuckled, shadows of memories playing across his face. “Thor reminded me of our elaborate schemes to steal freshly made pies from under Cook’s very nose. We rarely succeeded, but we had so much fun trying.” His grin faded and he sighed, looking out across the Manhattan skyline. “No, I don’t care to return to Asgard as it is today. But, I wish I could recapture those happy times and keep them in my heart. I feel as though... they happened to someone else.”

Damn, Tony thought. He was telling the truth.

“Loki... Aw, babe.” Tony gripped the back of Loki’s neck and squeezed. “You know, I’d do anything if I could fill in the empty spaces for you. And, yank out the bad spots. I wish I could—”

“Oh, stop. This isn’t a thermo-nuclear problem for you to solve,” Loki said good-naturedly. “It’s just... part of it, isn’t it? Being sentient? Being... alive?”

Tony shrugged. “Yeah, I guess. But, maybe now the memories will come back. And, hey, we’ve made some good ones ourselves, right?”

Loki nodded.

“Well, maybe you can mix ‘em together. With the ones coming in the future, too.”

Loki wagged his head, amused. “Such an optimist, Stark.”

“I have reason to be.” Tony was still gripping Loki’s neck, and he pulled him to him. He kissed him, and hot desire shot through Loki’s hormonally-charged body. He wormed his way into Tony’s arms and Tony held him, making him feel wanted, cherished, like the precious treasure Loki meant to be for him.

There in the atmosphere of the tower’s sky, the wind whirled around them, and the sun felt good on Loki’s back. In that moment, as far as he was concerned, Loki of Asgard had all of New York City at his feet—because he had Tony Stark by his side. 

_Oh, yes,_ he thought. 

Asgard could suck it.


	45. Dumbass

As Tony and Loki began making their way back to the living area, Loki reached for Tony’s hand and entwined their fingers. They grinned at each other as they entered the elevator, and Tony said, “Let’s keep the goodbyes short and sweet, okay? I’m, uh... tired.”

“Oh, I am as well,” Loki said airily. “Absolutely exhausted. I can hardly wait to lay myself down in our bed... to rest.”

“Yeah, me too, on account of how… _tired_ I am,” Tony said, repressing a snicker and freeing his hand to give Loki’s bottom a lascivious squeeze.

Loki yelped happily and shot Tony a wicked grin. “So, how do you reckon to rid ourselves of our guests without being outright rude? I assume that’s a concern.”

“Ha, don’t worry. I’ll give Pepper the ol’ heave-ho, she’ll see right through me, and she’ll tip off Bruce. Jane’s so Thor-sick, she won’t even notice. We’re good.”

“What about the Captain?” 

“Oh, shit, I forgot about him. You’re right, he’ll never take the hint, being a virgin and all.”

Loki made a “pffft” sound. “He’s not a virgin.” His brows drew together in doubt. “Is he?”

“Hell, I don’t know, but it doesn’t matter, the point is, he’ll want to stick around and chat. _That cannot happen.”_

“Right. Well, why not simply announce that they all must go home because you’ve been called upon to satisfy your mate’s need to rut?”

“No can do, babe. On Midgard, that’s known as TMI, and it’s... frowned upon. At least among nice ladies like Pep and Jane. And Capsicle.”

“I see. Well, I’m sure you’ll think of something.”

“Yeah, no problem, I’m Tony Stark. I can navigate a little social awkwardness. Just watch.”

Loki nodded, and the car came to a smooth halt. They strode through the doors and into the living room, which was abuzz with robotic activity. Little cleaning bots were swooshing around with whisk brooms and dust cloths, while one larger bot vacuumed, and another awaited orders to carry food back to the kitchen. Bruce was taking down decorations, Steve was moving furniture, Jane was organizing the gifts, and Pepper was orchestrating everything with military efficiency. She turned to greet Tony and Loki with a pleased smile.

“Hey, there you are. I think it went well, don’t you?”

“It was amazing. Brava! An absolute triumph,” Loki said sincerely. “Thank you so much.”

“Did you have fun?”

Loki was prepared to continue making whatever reassuring sounds were needed to quickly move things along, but Pepper’s question stopped him cold. “Fun?” he asked, sounding bewildered.

“Yeah, did you have a good time?” She paused to eye Loki more closely. After all, it wasn’t a hard question.

“I, uh—” 

Tony stepped up. “Pep, it rocked, you guys were awesome. Now, everybody go home,” he said, making a shooing gesture. The four stopped what they were doing to give him a puzzled look, and Tony added, “I mean, this was an incredible amount of work, you all must be dead on your feet. So, go on, get out of here, we’ll finish up later.”

“Oh, I’d like to see that,” Pepper said scornfully. “No, there’s just a little more stuff to put away, and—”

“And, I’ll take care of it,” Tony said, giving her a meaningful look as he took a silver tray out of her hands. “Now, thanks a million, but _scoot.”_

Pepper stared from Tony’s supposedly eager-to-help face to Loki. He still hadn’t answered her and was now studying the floor, frowning in thought. Pepper was beginning to feel uneasy.

“Loki, what’s wrong? Did we screw up somehow?”

He looked up. “No, not at all. It was lovely.”

Tony nodded vigorously. “Yeah, it was super-cool, now if you guys could just _go—”_

“Hold on a minute.” Pepper went up to Loki and put a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, come on, tell me what’s bothering you. Did we offend you? Was it too much? Not enough? Did we forget something? Please, I really want to know.”

Loki focused on her and smiled slightly. “No, it was perfect. But, your question—did I have fun...?” He drew in a breath and let it out sharply. “I grew up a prince, accustomed to finery, comfort, unending luxury. But with all that came a sense of duty. Responsibility. Always in the public eye, always tasked to maintain the royal image. To uphold the myth of the throne... For me, fun came in stolen moments. I had to _take_ it, I don’t recall it ever being offered to me, by anyone.” Loki’s jaw was set in the old bitter lines, but after a moment, his expression turned gentle, quizzical. “Did you truly make all this happen in hopes that I would find enjoyment in it?”

It was Pepper’s turn to look bewildered. “Well, yeah. Of course. We, all of us—we wanted you to have fun. That was kind of the point.”

“Yeah, babe,” Tony added. “They were totally trying to make it all just the way you’d like it. They did it all for you.” 

Loki looked from Tony to Pepper, and gave a soft laugh. Then, he took Pepper’s hand and raised it to his lips. He pressed a kiss, and said, “That is... astonishing. Thank you.” 

Pepper shrugged, not sure what to say. “It was our pleasure,” she at last said kindly. “You’ve sort of wormed your way into our hearts.” 

Loki chuckled. “Well, I had a very good time.”

By now, Bruce had joined them, and he patted Loki on the back. “Good deal.”

Steve was standing stalwart beside him, nodding. “It was a gesture to show that we all support you.”

Jane came up next. “Yes. I know we don’t know each other very well yet, but Thor... When he found out we were planning this, he was so excited. He’s so happy that you liked it.”

Loki stepped back, beaming. “I did like it. You’ve all made me feel so welcome. Thank you again.” He tipped his head graciously, caught up in genuine gratitude. But then he saw Tony, his hair left ruffled by the wind, dark eyes trained on him like a laser, looking hot as hell in that Ironman pose with a slight tent in his trousers. 

_Oh, yes._

Back to the matter at hand. 

“But now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll retire. It’s been a very busy day.” He raised an eyebrow impishly. “Hasn’t it, love?”

That was Tony’s cue. He clapped his hands together purposefully.

“It sure was. Big success! Now, I’m sure you guys have other things to do, places to go—don’t feel you need to hang around on our account. Adios!” Tony made like a theater usher, indicating the location of the exit. When no one moved, he added, “In other words, get OUT.”

Pepper had known Tony a long time, and was familiar with this particular brand of impatience. Plus the smirk on Loki’s face... Understanding dawned. “Oh. I get it. Bruce, come on, let’s go. The parents-to-be need some alone time.”

“Huh? Oh. Okay,” Bruce said. He waved a hand at a bunch of garland lying on the floor. “I can just take this stuff down to the garage, and—”

“Nope, leave it, we’re going. You too, Steve, we’ll give you a ride. Jane, are you coming?”

Jane was holding a handful of tiny baby clothes, and she looked up as if shaken from a daydream. “Oh, we’re leaving? Okay.” She laid the clothes on the couch and went to grab her purse from a room down the hall. The others followed to get their things.

They returned to say one last goodbye to Tony and Loki, but they were gone. The four heard the closing of a door down the hallway and a sudden spouting of decidedly raucous laughter. Bruce and Pepper grinned as they made their way to the elevator.

Steve frowned. “What? Where’d they go? What’re they...?”

“Think about it,” Pepper said cheerily.

Steve looked uncertainly to Bruce. He made a crude gesture, forefinger of one hand poking in and out of a circle he made with the other, and Steve reddened. “Oh.”

“It was a really good baby shower,” Bruce said with a wink, holding the doors open.

They rode down to ground level. Happy brought the car around, everyone piled in, and they headed back to Pepper’s.

*******

Tony led the way into the bedroom and Loki followed, closing the door behind him. He started to say something, but Tony made a swift three-point turn, grabbed Loki’s arms, and skillfully guided him to the bed. Loki made a show of resisting, a pretty _good_ show, and he had them both laughing by the time Tony wrestled him onto the mattress, careful for the swell of Loki’s belly. Once they were snuggled in face to face, they started kissing. Somewhere down the hall, they heard their friends leave.

“Alone at last,” Tony said.

“Yes.” Loki wedged himself in closer to Tony and sighed contentedly. “Quiet again. It’s wonderful.”

Tony grinned smugly. “How’d you like the subtle way I got rid of them?”

“Subtle? Is that what you were attempting?” Loki shook his head in amusement. “Ah, well—I suppose, for you, it was.”

“Listen, I didn’t say, ‘Get out of my house so I can have a roll in the sack with my boyfriend,’ like you would’ve done.”

“True. I admire your restraint.”

“Damn right. I can do subtle, classy, whatever, as long as I end up getting to be with you.”

Loki’s superior sneer faded, replaced by a serious look. He laid a hand alongside Tony’s face and looked into his eyes. “You Midgardians. I am constantly in awe of your ways. Your feeble little bodies that hold so much strength, your foolish hearts so filled with courage and love. To think I used to...” He let the thought fizzle away, glad when Tony gathered him closer, and he buried his face in Tony’s neck, inhaling his scent. Tony shivered at the cold nose on his warm skin, but it felt amazing.

“Is this your way of admitting that you can be a dumbass sometimes?”

Loki snickered. “Is that what you would like? An admission of dumb-assery from me? Well, so you shall have it: there are occasions on which I can be a tremendous dumbass. And, I am very thankful to you for pointing it out when needed.”

“My pleasure. And, hey... Right back at you.”

They lay together for a long while, each enjoying the touch of the other, the rhythm of beating hearts. 

Eventually, Tony pushed Loki’s shirt up and laid his hand on Loki’s tummy, fingers spread wide to span the breadth of firm skin. He slid his hand in a slow arc over where his baby was growing, a little arm or leg pressing outward to meet him. “Hey, look—he knows me! Hi, baby, Daddy loves you!” Tony scooted down and planted kisses all over Loki’s stomach, and Loki rolled his eyes in good-natured exasperation. 

“He—or she—is simply responding to external stimuli, you could be a goat for all he knows.”

“You are SUCH a dumbass...” Tony murmured between kisses.

“Why don’t you put that mouth to a more practical use?” Loki suggested helpfully, trying to shove Tony’s head down to his crotch.

“Jeeze, impatient much? I’ll get to it, I’ll get to it...” Tony paused to nip the bulge in the front of Loki’s trousers, earning himself a delighted chortle for his trouble, but then Loki twisted away.

“Get off me. We need to be naked,” Loki announced imperiously.

Tony obediently slid off the bed and Loki got to his feet, whisking off his shirt and pants almost as quickly as he’d have done if he’d had the use of his magic. He lay back down and watched as Tony methodically removed his watch and tie before pulling off his suit jacket. He took the time to hang it up, carefully smoothing out a few wrinkles.

Loki glowered at him. “Stark! What in the Nine are you doing, I thought you wanted to fuck me. I’d be better off pleasuring myself to pay-per-view porn than waiting for you to remove all of your tailor-made dandy-wear.”

Tony hid a grin and instead flashed him a snarl of disgust. “Give me a minute, will you! This is _Armani—_ want me to just drop it on the floor like a wet towel? And, if you want to talk dandyism—I’m not the one with gold threads and silk piping on his jacket, am I?” 

“Oh, I do look good in that one, don’t I?” Loki said, pleased.

“Listen, you look fucking hot in anything, especially my bed.” Tony grinned naughtily as he unbuttoned his shirt extra-slow, and then wiggled out of his trousers as Loki drummed his fingers on the nightstand. 

Tony hung up the pants.

He appeared to be about to drop his underwear when he stopped and strode to the bathroom.

“Where are you going?” Loki asked.

“Gotta brush my teeth!”

“Oh, for the love of...”

The sound of very thorough, very vigorous brushing came in loud and clear, followed by copious amounts of rinsing, spitting, and then gargling. 

“Now what are you doing?” Loki asked dourly.

“Want to be minty-fresh for you, babe!”

“Mm. Would that you were so concerned about the stench you make when you fart in the middle of the night.”

Tony returned and began dragging down his underwear, but something on his ass caught his attention and he comically tried to turn around to give it a suspicious glare. “What the hell...? Look at this, babe, what is it? A zit? Ingrown hair? You don’t think it’s skin cancer, do you? All that tanning on nude beaches, bound to catch up with me someday...” Tony went to Loki’s bedside, turned and leaned forward, presenting the offending area for Loki’s inspection, only to get a growl of aggravation and a resounding smack on his rear. 

“Do NOT expect me to play nursemaid to your disgusting dermatological flaws, human! If you’re worried, go to a doctor. Otherwise, small-clothes off, and get in bed. _Now.”_

Tony straightened and twisted to examine the spot again, frowning thoughtfully. “You know, on second thought, I think it’s an ant bite. I’m kind of allergic. I better put some Benadryl on it—”

“Stark, so help me...”

Tony gave a low chuckle, pausing to admire his beautiful, impatient, thoroughly irritated god. “Eh, it’s fine. Thanks for your heartwarming concern, though.” 

“Ah, well, never mind, I no longer find you appealing in the least. You know what I do find appealing? Cake. I only had one slice, I’m going to fetch more—” 

Loki started to get up, but in a flash, Tony was naked and on the bed, making Loki scoot over to make room for him. “Oh, no you don’t. Something tells me you’re still VERY interested, and we can get cake later. Or—whoa. Wait here.”

Loki let out a groan of frustration, but the sight of Tony’s bare butt zipping out of the room was enough of a distraction to keep him from doing some serious damage to the room. When Tony came back, he carried a huge piece of cake on a plate like a trophy.

“Here we go.”

“Oh, no. No, no food play. It’s—sticky.” Loki frowned in distaste. “Besides, I was only joking about wanting more. I fear the heavy fat and sugar content of your Midgardian desserts will put unnecessary weight on my already burgeoning figure. I doubt you’ve noticed, but lately I’ve had to become more creative with my wardrobe to allow for the... fullness that’s taken place.”

“Hell, you could use a few extra pounds, you’re eating for two. And, as far as I’m concerned, you’re gorgeous just like this. No clothes needed.” Tony openly ogled Loki as he settled back on the bed, cake in hand. He pulled off a chunk and offered it to Loki.

“Flatterer.” Loki glanced down at himself and mournfully shook his head. “I look like one of those python snakes after it’s ingested a chicken.” 

That made Tony lose his concentration and burst into laughter before saying, “You do not.” Tony kissed him and murmured, “You look good pregnant.” He pressed the cake to Loki’s lips, and he agreeably opened his mouth and allowed himself to be fed.

Loki liked it when Tony worshipped him (in his own inelegant Midgardian way) and he liked sharing the treat, eating a morsel from Tony’s hand, licking his fingers when it was all gone, making Tony moan. Loki lay back, fitting himself against Tony. He took his lover’s cock in his hand, stroked and squeezed it, and let out a sigh of admiration.

“Look at you, so hard for me. Impressive, given your advanced Midgardian age...”

“Don’t go there...” Tony said. He still had a finger’s worth of frosting left, and he looked at it appraisingly. “Might have to use this for lube.”

“Eww. Let’s not.” He gave Tony a frosting-flavored kiss. “I do think we’d best get down to business, though, before I really do lose interest. I wasn’t being entirely facetious when I said I was tired.”

“My poor baby.” Tony kissed him back, and then he scooted to the edge of the bed. 

Loki scowled. “Now what’re you doing?”

Tony looked surprised. “Thought you were ready to ‘get down to business.’”

“Yes, which is why I question your moving further away from me. Your cock’s not that long.” Loki grinned sweetly.

“Ha ha. I was just, you know, giving you room to do your thing.”

“My thing.”

“Yeah, you know, the blue thing.” Tony waggled his eyebrows lasciviously.

“Oh.” The explanation brought forth a surge of irritation. It was true that for the last few weeks of their lovemaking, Loki had chosen to assume his Jotunn form every time. There’d been a persistent need roiling in his groin that was only soothed by Tony’s deep thrusting, but that had finally passed. Now, he just wanted to be himself, but what if Tony liked his intersex self better?

“Is that your preference?” he asked in a flat tone.

Uh-oh, Tony thought, a little jolt of panic hitting him. Having a choice in how your lover’s genitals were presented to you wasn’t nearly as cool as he’d originally thought, not when hurt feelings were lurking just beneath the surface. “Uh... No? I mean, I like it, I like it a lot, any time, but, you know, I like everything we do in bed, well, maybe not the handcuff thing, that was kind of ouch-ier than I like, but—”

Loki’s annoyance had gained steam. “Do you prefer my female organs for sex or not?”

Tony gave him a pleading look. “Baby, I love you. I love you whether you’re Jotunn, or just my sweet Loki, the guy I fell in love with, it doesn’t matter. Either way, you make me feel good. The only thing that matters to me is that I make you feel good. I just need for you to tell me what you want.”

All the perfect words, and they only made Loki angrier. Fury whooshed through him, and even though he knew it wasn’t directed at Tony, he couldn’t help lashing out.

“Let’s get one thing straight. In spite of my current predicament, I’m a _man,_ I’m _male,_ and if it weren’t for what was no doubt a run of the most noxious hormones ever found in the nine realms, I would never have taken on that cursed form for any purpose. And, never would again, if at all possible.” He huffed in disgust, sat up against the headboard with his arms folded across his heaving chest.

Tony wisely kept his distance, sensing that this wasn’t the time for logic. He carefully pulled himself up to mirror Loki’s pose at the extreme other end of the bed and stayed quiet. Pepper had taught him a thing or two about hormones, and he‘d learned he could keep his trap shut for hours if he needed to. He set his jaw in a firmly locked position and stared straight ahead.

They were both quiet for a bit, Loki clearly stewing, Tony studying the wallpaper. Then, Tony turned to look at Loki. Shit. He looked so unhappy—Tony couldn’t stand it. He scooted closer and pulled Loki back into his arms, but Loki irritably jerked away. “I’m so sorry, baby,” Tony said softly. “I’m so sorry.”

There wasn’t a sound in the room except for Loki’s angry breathing, but after a while, his unyielding pose drooped a little. “Oh... You’ve nothing to be sorry for. I don’t mean to be difficult, it’s not aimed at you. I just feel so... so...” His hands were clinched in frustration as he searched for the right words.

“Pregnant?” Tony supplied, a lighter note in his voice.

Loki looked at him in amazement and nodded. “Yes, that’s it exactly.” He gestured at himself. “Look at me! Everything’s out of my control, my body is no longer my own, I feel things that don’t make sense, I want things that I don’t really want, and I can’t even gather my scattered wits enough to explain myself to the one I love most in the world without losing my temper.” In a plaintive voice he added, “How can you put up with me?”

“Well, in fairness, you’re not all that different from when you’re not pregnant—” Tony stoically accepted a hard shot to the ribs from Loki’s elbow as being his due. “Ow.” He rubbed the spot and continued. “The point is, as I said—I love you, for a lot of reasons. Now, relax. Come on, come over here. I’m telling you, you can be as much of a dumbass as you want—I’m still not going anywhere.” He held out his arms and Loki hesitated only a moment before inserting himself. He allowed himself to be soothed by Tony’s warmth, shivering as his mortal ran a hand up and down his back and planted a kiss on his temple. He felt the anger evaporate.

“My alchemist,” he murmured softly.

“Huh?”

“You’ve taken a heart of dullest granite and magicked it somehow.” Loki scooted lower to lay his head on Tony’s chest, eyes aglow from the arc reactor. “You take the rage and hatred stored there, draw it out and spin it into gold. Any sorcerer would envy you such talent.”

“I think it’s called ‘listening.’ Which I never used to do, ask Pepper. But you... I don’t know, you make me want to be better. You make me want to think about stuff besides booze and sex and circuit boards. Oh, and hot cars. Not that those aren’t fun—it’s just, I’d rather do them with you. Well, not the booze, that has to wait, but, yeah.”

Loki looked up and settled so he could take a quizzical look Tony into eyes. “Speaking of which—how long’s it been since you had a drink?”

Tony shrugged. “I had a sample of that horse piss your brother brought here this afternoon, talk about rank. Other than that... I don’t know, months, I guess.”

Loki gave a slow smile. “Since you found out I was pregnant.”

Another shrug. “Yeah. I’ve had a shot or two, here and there—but, nothing like I used to do.” He looked at Loki. “I just haven’t felt the need.”

Loki reached up and kissed Tony. “I want you in me, Stark.”

“Yes...” Tony making a triumphant fist-pumping gesture. “So... We’re going for plain old run-of-the-mill gay sex, right?” 

Loki snickered. “As if I’d participate in anything run-of-the-mill. But, yes, that’s what we’re going for.”

“All right,” Tony said with satisfaction. He opened the nightstand drawer and fumbled for lube, laying it on the bed beside him. He kissed his way down Loki’s body, found his cock with his lips and took him in. Loki moaned appreciatively; Tony really was masterful at this, his lips and tongue working in harmony as he first licked and then sucked, pointy mustache hairs prickling sensitive flesh. Loki closed his eyes, only vaguely aware when Tony reached for the lube without stopping what he was doing. 

Then, he did stop and Loki opened his eyes a slit. Tony was looking at him, those huge brown eyes shimmering with lust. “Legs apart, Shakespeare. Gotta do a little prep work before the big game.”

Loki chuckled, raised his knees and obeyed, and he felt Tony’s slicked-up finger probe into him. He groaned at the breach, a thrill of want spreading heat from the pit of his stomach to his cock, to his nipples, to the tips of his fingers and toes. He arched into it, welcoming Tony in with little wriggles of pleasure, and Tony eased in a second finger. A deep sigh came from Loki’s throat and he started murmuring. “Oh, Stark, someday I’ll return this gentle care, this tender preparation, right before I plunge myself into the unplundered depths of your well-muscled backside...”

Tony paused his ministrations to respond. “Big talk for a pregnant guy.” He twisted his fingers in search of Loki’s prostate.

“Well, that’s in the future— _oh!_ yes, just there—first, I must birth this damn baby, then, reclaim my body, and finally... ah, gods, yes... go about the business of seducing the hell out of my cocky little Midgardian.” Loki’s words were coming breathily, stilted. “M-mm, ah, I, uh... I’ll have you on your hands and knees one day, my love—”

“Uh-huh.”

“—and, then, I’ll spear you— _Norns,_ that’s good, don’t stop—spear you like a majestic beast, oh, fuck me now, PLEASE—”

Tony grinned. “Loki?”

“Eh?”

“Are you saying you’re ready for me?” 

“Ah, yes. That will do, Stark. Let’s... proceed.” 

Chuckling, Tony shifted himself up, but halted as he realized he was about to put his full weight on Loki’s stomach.

“Uh, hold on. I don’t think this is such a good idea.”

“What do you mean?” Loki gasped.

“I’ve been reading one of your pregnancy books—”

“You have?” That was a revelation. Loki hadn’t noticed Tony reading anything but email since they’d met.

“Yeah. It said that missionary-style isn’t so great in the last trimester, for the, uh, parent’s comfort, plus it could even be dangerous in some cases. I think you’re far enough along that we need to try a different position.”

Loki blinked. “But I like it when you’re on top of me. I can look in your eyes and kiss you.”

“I know, I like it too, but I’m afraid I’ll squish the baby.”

Loki’s brow furrowed as he considered Tony’s comments. “Well, what do you suggest? I refuse to rut like a dog in this condition, so that’s out.”

“Okay, well, turn on your side.” 

“All right.” Loki gave him a little smile, and with a bit of effort, hefted himself up and over, settling into the soft nest of the mattress, a pillow supporting his head and neck just so. 

Tony snuggled up behind him, sliding one arm under Loki as he cradled his lover’s belly with the other. He held him like that for a while, nuzzling under his ear and pressing his groin against Loki’s bottom. “How’s this?”

“Nice, if you want me to fall asleep.”

“Uh, nope, don’t want that.”

“Then, maybe we could try having intercourse. Just a suggestion.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Okay, okay. Just trying to take care of you.” He raised himself, assessing the logistics of the situation. He squeezed more lube into his palm and slicked himself. He helped Loki pull up his knee and then, going slowly, eased inside him, groaning as slick heat sucked him in. “This okay?” he whispered.

“Y-yes.” The intrusion was a relief after so much anticipation, but, damn, it had been a while since they’d made love in this manner. Loki had forgotten how... well-endowed Tony was. “I’ll just need a moment to, uh, become reacquainted with this particular activity.”

Tony pressed in until he was fully sheathed, and then he leaned down to kiss Loki. “I’ll be careful.”

“Thank you.” Loki looked back over his shoulder. “Now, move!” He gave a little backward thrust as encouragement.

“You got it, angel. I love you.”

Tony had been right, Loki quickly realized. It was good, so good, there was no pressure on his stomach and he could easily reach his cock to stroke himself in rhythm with Tony’s thrusts. It didn’t take him long to spend, and Tony came right after, letting out a roar of release and clutching Loki close to him. 

“Tony...” Loki gasped. He flipped over to face Tony, and they embraced for a long, long time.

Tony was almost asleep when he felt the little fluttering under Loki’s skin where it pressed against his own belly. He ran a hand over the spot, and said, “Hey, baby...” 

Loki chuckled. “Well, how about that? Seems he does know you, after all.”

“I could have told you that.” Tony tipped Loki’s face up and gave him a warm kiss. “Dumbass.”

“Is that to be my name for the rest of this pregnancy?” Loki asked with a sigh.

“Nah, just when it’s deserved. And, then again when the kid’s a teenager.”

“I’m sure he’ll call me worse than that.”

“Not when I’m around. Mutual respect’s the name of the game, right?”

Loki gave wry smile and nodded. He snuggled into Tony’s chest and blissfully fell asleep.


	46. Ultrasound

Bruce Banner put down the thick, glossy-paged textbook he’d spent the last two hours poring over and sighed. He slid his glasses on top of his head before digging his knuckles into his eyes, partly to reenergize them, and partly to banish the unending illustrations of births-gone-wrong he’d been perusing. Then, he leaned back and stretched.

“You okay?” Pepper asked as she passed him on her way to the kitchen.

“No, not particularly.”

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m a very stupid man.”

Pepper looked at the book and instantly understood. She came to stand behind him and began massaging his shoulders. “Yes, you are,” she said fondly. “How’d you get yourself into this mess, anyway?”

“Oh, you know—that beloved bastard of ours, Tony Stark.”

“Oh, yeah?”

Bruce nodded. “Yeah. Loki needed a pre-natal checkup and Tony didn’t—doesn’t—want to let the situation become public knowledge, so... he asked me to give him a once-over, and I said yes.” He shrugged. “Now, I’m apparently the guy’s obstetrician. Refer back to my previous statement—I’m an idiot. But, there’s an unborn baby involved, plus Loki seems to have taken a liking to me, sooo...”

“You really are an idiot.”

“Says the lady who threw him a baby shower.”

“Hey, the fact that I can recognize idiocy in others doesn’t mean I don’t suffer from it myself. Of course, I’m pretty sure Tony Stark’s a carrier. And Loki, well—there’s just something about him that makes it really hard to hate the guy.”

“I know...” Bruce said absently as he readjusted his glasses and dragged the text back into reading position. “He’s charming, in an ex-villain-y kind of way. Plus, I’m probably the only guy capable of handling him if he starts throwing magic fireballs during labor. Well, the green guy.” He looked back to give Pepper a rueful grin.

“Please don’t joke about that.”

He chuckled softly and waited until Pepper left the room to add, “Not a joke, sweetheart.” He turned back to the page about preeclampsia and started to read.

********

Happily, Bruce and Loki had developed a good-humored sense of trust between them. Loki no longer hesitated to cooperate when Bruce came over to give him his weekly check-up—nothing elaborate, just a pulse and blood pressure check, and listening to Loki’s and the baby’s heartbeats. Normally, such frequent monitoring wouldn’t be necessary, but given Bruce’s limited obstetrical experience, his lack of advanced equipment, and having absolutely no knowledge of the Jotunn gestational period, he figured he’d better use what he could to create a “norm.” That way, he could at least take note if a significant deviation in Loki’s vitals were to develop.

Not that he was sure what he’d do if it did.

But, to date, things were progressing beautifully. As far as he could tell, the fetus was developing properly, and Loki was perfectly healthy. But, Loki presumably was entering his third trimester, and at this point, anything could happen. Gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, early labor, problems with the placenta—the list went on and on, and that wasn’t even mentioning some sort of bizarre space alien condition that NO ONE on Earth would have any knowledge about.

Which kept Bruce returning to a nagging thought—sooner or later, he’d have to do an internal exam. 

On _Loki._

The prospect was slightly terrifying. First and most obviously, the idea of convincing Loki to let Bruce stick his fingers in a very intimate part of his body seemed laughable. 

Second, there was the very real problem of accessing that intimate part. From what he’d been able to glean from Tony’s bawdy description, Loki outwardly looked just like any other male, and it was only when he assumed his Jotunn form that his, uh, “quim,” as Loki apparently called it, appeared. The thought was a little disconcerting.

Although, let’s face it, Bruce was curious. He’d actually spent quite a bit of time wondering about the anatomical differences that Loki must be sporting under his Aesir skin, and the thought of actually getting to explore them was kind of exciting. But what would it tell him? What if Loki’s Jotunn equipment was all... strange and squiggly inside? It wasn’t like he could Google a diagram of it.

In any case, he really didn’t want to go in until it was absolutely necessary.

And, there was another pressing issue—the question of Loki’s due date. Loki’s mom would have to be escorted from Asgard, and possibly his birth mother from Jotunheim as well, in order to cover all the intergalactic midwifery bases. Loki and Thor were going to have to coordinate so that the thunder god could play Bifrost taxi driver for the two women, and while Bruce didn’t know much about their communication systems, he had a feeling there was more to it than sending a couple of texts.

Bruce had calculated a due date; assuming the agreed-upon date of conception was correct, and assuming the gestational period of a half-human, half-Jotunn-runt was similar to that of the average mortal, it was a fair bet that Loki would give birth sometime toward the end of May. But, who the hell knew if that was the case? Only by getting a look at the fetus’s state of development could he feel confident in the numbers.

Ugh. He had to talk to Tony.

*********

“Loki needs a sonogram,” Bruce informed Tony over lunch. 

They were at the deli down the street from Stark Tower. Loki was busy organizing Tony’s office—a chore that Tony frankly never intended to do, and one which Pepper had long ago given up on—and had flatly refused to go anywhere until he had things under control. Surprisingly, the god had taken to the tedious work with relish, stating that he was bored enough to enjoy just about any project short of mucking out stables, so Tony had given him a basic rundown on how he wanted things sorted and filed, and then left him to it, promising to bring back a couple of ham-on-ryes for him. With cheese fries. And a soda. Because Loki was so concerned about eating healthy while pregnant. 

Yeah.

“Huh?” Tony asked, looking up from his equally healthy pastrami sandwich.

Bruce held his gaze. “Look, Tony—you know I’m flying by the seat of my pants on this whole baby thing, and while I’m pretty sure that everything’s fine—”

Tony’s eyes narrowed. “‘Pretty sure?’” he demanded.

“Well, it seems like it, but there’re a lot of problems that could develop—if we’re able to detect them in advance, we could prepare. And, to be honest, I’d like to get a preview of Loki’s insides without, uh, actually becoming personally acquainted with them unless I have to.” He braced himself for some crude references to Loki’s sexual organs, but Tony just sat there, intermittently chewing. He picked up his drink cup, took a swig, and then cast a narrow look at Bruce.

“Where the hell am I supposed to get an ultrasound machine?”

“Can’t you just bribe someone to give us time with one at the local hospital?”

“Could. Won’t. It’s too risky, people talk no matter how much you pay them. Anyway, are you saying you’d know how to run one?”

“Well, yeah, but I learned on a really old unit. I’m sure everything’s changed somewhat. But, I imagine I could brush up pretty quickly.”

“Still too risky. I don’t want to take a chance on this news leaking out, for a lot of reasons.”

They went back to their food for a moment, and then Tony said, “I could buy one.”

Bruce paused in mid-bite of his veggie burger. “Kind of an expensive investment, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t matter. I could donate it somewhere afterwards.”

“Well, that would be wonderful, but I don’t think you can just zip down to medical supply and get one. I mean, I don’t think you could stay anonymous, and even if you claimed you were getting it for charitable purposes, I’m afraid that would bring a lot of unwanted attention on you.”

“Yeah.” Tony nodded thoughtfully, drumming his fingers on the table. Suddenly, he brightened. “Hey, what about one of those, what do you call ‘em, prenatal imaging places?”

“How would that be any better than a hospital?”

“Easier to scam. Look, I’ll get you, me, and Loki fake IDs—he can be some exotic princess with diplomatic immunity, and I’ll be her handler. We’ll say Princess Peach only allows her personal physician—that’s you—to deal with her intimate business, and she suddenly decided she wants a pic of her Royal Bun to send back home to her folks in Kazakhstan or someplace.”

“Kazakhstan is a republic.”

“Whatever. I’ll get Pepper on it, we can do it this afternoon.”

“Wow, really? That fast?”

“Do you still not know how awesome she is?”

“Oh, I know. I just didn’t realize she could defy state, federal, _and_ international law, all within a few hours. Or that she’d be willing to.”

“Psh, leave her to me.” Tony had already punched in Pepper’s number and the phone was ringing on the other end. 

“Hi, Tony,” came Pepper’s calm voice. “What’s up?”

“Got a little request, gorgeous. Here’s the deal...”

Bruce listened in quiet amusement as Tony went over the plan, and then as Pepper’s voice rose loud enough for him to hear every word. It took some doing on Tony’s part, but after five minutes of cajoling and bribery, Pepper agreed, and Tony hung up.

He smiled. “See? Piece of cake.”

Bruce nodded. “Uh-huh. But, one more thing. How are you going to convince Loki to dress up like a princess?”

“Well, normally, I’d just tell him it was a sex thing. But for this?” Tony pursed his lips and balefully stared straight ahead. “I have no idea.”

*********

Loki was lounging on the living room couch among a nest of pillows, arms spread out and bare feet tucked under him. He was placidly listening to first Tony’s, and then Bruce’s explanation of what they had in mind for him that afternoon, including what an ultrasound was and how it worked. When they finished, he smiled beatifically. “You are both insane,” he said coolly. “I’m going back to the archaeological dig that is Tony Stark’s office, but feel free to dress up and have invisible sound waves run through your bodies all you want. I’m having none of it.” With that, he grandly swung his feet to the floor and stood up, teetering a moment before steadying himself around his now front-heavy center of balance.

“Loki, sit down,” Tony said. “Ultrasound’s different than an X-ray, it’s not dangerous.”

“The procedure won’t hurt the fetus, I promise,” Bruce added. “But it’ll give me information so I can be prepared when you give birth, in case something goes wrong.”

“My mother has helped birth hundreds of babies, and she’s invited Farbauti to attend as well. They are both great healers. Why should I have need of you?”

Bruce sighed. It had been a balancing act all along, trying to be positive and upbeat about what Loki was going to go through, while still keeping him grounded about the risks. He certainly didn’t want to create unnecessary anxiety now. He gave Loki a rueful smile. “You’re right, of course. I’m being overly cautious. But, isn’t that what we want? To cover all the possibilities? With the ultrasound, we can determine that everything’s fine so far. And, we’ll probably be able to tell if it’s a boy or a girl.”

Loki crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow interestedly. “Go on.”

“Honest, Loki, there’s no danger, and it won’t hurt. Lots of parents-to-be think it’s fun! It doesn’t take long, and you and Tony will get to see your kiddo before it’s born. Don’t you think that’d be cool?”

Loki shrugged slightly. “I suppose. But, this nonsense about my dressing as a female—” Loki raised his eyes and gave an annoyed sneer.

“It’s not like you haven’t done it before,” Tony pointed out.

“That was different!”

Bruce held up a hand placatingly. “Hey, I don’t blame you for not wanting to go along with our scheme. It’s just—”

Tony’s tone was serious now. “It’s just, I can’t take a chance on the media getting hold of this juicy bit of gossip.” He took Loki’s hand and led him back to the couch, pulling him against himself as they sat down. “I want to protect you and our baby from everything, always. Right now, I have to keep you away from the sick fucks who’d lose their minds over a chance to plaster us all over the front page of one of their trash rags. And, if that means putting you in a skirt for an hour with a fake name and foreign address, well, that’s just the way it has to be.”

“But, why is this so important?” Loki asked plaintively. “What are we afraid of?”

He looked at Bruce, and Bruce took a deep breath. “Loki... Bad things can happen during labor. Hemorrhage, resulting in the, uh, parent bleeding out. Cord wrapped around the baby’s neck, cutting off its air. Unproductive contractions, needing a C-section. I’m not a medical doctor, and I honestly don’t know what would happen if something like that came up, but that’s why I want to do everything possible to reduce the risks. I know you’re counting on your mom, but I have to ask—is she infallible?”

Loki blinked a few times and a sad look came over him. He swallowed hard and shook his head. “No. Some have been lost.”

“Okay. And, not to be a complete worrywart, but there’s no guarantee that she’ll be here as soon as you go into labor. That’s another reason for the ultrasound—we’ll have a better idea of when to expect the little nipper to make an appearance.” He put his hands together in mock supplication. “Come on. Just give me this one, will you? I swear I’ll never make fun of you for wearing a dress.”

Loki cracked a grin. “As if there’d be anything to make jest about. I’d be stunning.” He sobered and turned to Tony. “Are you sure this is necessary?”

Tony took Loki’s hand and squeezed it between his own. “I think so, yeah.” He raised the hand to his lips and pressed a kiss against it. “Anything to help keep you safe, you know? Plus, I kind of want to know if it’s a boy or a girl. Doesn’t matter, but... I can’t help it, I’m curious.”

Loki tilted his head pityingly. “As I’ve pointed out before—it could be both.”

“Yeah, I’m aware. If that’s the case, I wouldn’t mind having a little extra time to get used to the idea.” He spoke lightly and smiled. “Come on, babe. Let’s do it.”

A low groan of annoyance came from the god’s throat, but he nodded. “All right, all right, I’m weary of fighting. What do I have to do?”

“You have to put this on,” a haggard-looking Pepper said from just inside the door. She held up a hanger holding a long flowing gown batiked in soft shades of green. 

A pained look came over Loki, but he went to take it from Pepper. He eyed it critically. “Hmph. Well, I guess it’s not too bad. Fine, I’ll go change.”

“Here, take this stuff too.” Pepper handed him a bag, and when he peered inside, Loki could see it was filled with makeup and hair products. He gave her an exasperated huff, and Pepper shrugged. “Go change, I’ll help you with the rest. Trust me, you’ll be gorgeous.” 

“That was never in question. But, just so you know, when I again have the use of my seidr? I’m turning you all into wombats.” Loki grabbed the bag from her hand and stalked off to the bathroom.

Tony watched Loki leave and then asked of Pepper, “Do you have the documents?” 

She grimaced. “I do, and I’m with Loki on the wombat idea. Listen, Tony, this was Not. Easy. You owe me big time.” She held out an envelope and Tony took it gingerly from her hand, as if expecting her to belt him with it. He pulled out authentic looking passports and ID cards, scuffed up enough to look worn. 

“Perfect. Thanks a million, honey. I’ll take care of you, you know that.”

“Yeah, yeah. Call me when you can give me back the last six years of my life. Then, we’ll talk.”

Bruce came up and gave her a sympathetic hug, and they smiled at each other before Pepper announced, “I’d better go check on our phony princess.”

“Technically, he’s the real deal, in a super complicated way,” Tony said helpfully.

“I’ll keep that in mind when he fights me over the mascara and lip gloss. Oh, wait, I forgot—these are for you two.” Pepper dug in another bag and pulled out a fuzzy blond beard and spray-in hair coloring, which she slapped into Tony’s hand, and a large black mustache, which she gave to Bruce. The two men gave her a puzzled look and she grinned. “Disguises. Just to be on the safe side. It’s okay, they’re professional grade—if you put them on right, they won’t look too goofy.” Getting no response, Pepper shoved first Tony, then Bruce, in the direction of another bathroom. “Do it!”

The guys reluctantly headed off, and Pepper rolled her eyes before going to help Loki with his transformation.

*********

Pulling off the scam turned out to be not that much of a trick. The receptionist looked at Loki—stunning as promised with his masculine frame softened convincingly by the folds of the gown, a scarf tied around his long black hair, and makeup expertly applied to give him an exotic appearance—and then she turned her attention to a semi-blond Tony. He used his most charming persona and did all the talking, offering to call the State Department for her if she had any questions. 

She didn’t. She simply took Tony’s cash payment, handed over forms for them to fill out, and then waved them off to a waiting area. They had it to themselves as there had been only one couple ahead of them, and they were called in to a room just as the three arrived.

The ultrasound technician was more of a challenge, put off as she was by the idea of giving up her machine to a stranger. But heavily-mustached Bruce managed to fake an almost indecipherable accent and made a show of confidence around the machine, repeatedly thrusting his “credentials” at her, and Tony soothingly backed him up, reiterating their story about the princess wanting to share a picture of her growing fetus with her family back home, until the tech threw her hands in the air, no doubt figuring it best to just let them get it over with before they caused an international incident. 

It probably didn’t hurt that Tony slipped her a few $100 bills. She tucked them in her pocket, set up the machine, and left the room, announcing she was on break. Tony locked the door, wedging a chair under the door handle for good measure. 

“Let’s get this done, guys.”

“All right.” Bruce yanked off the mustache and then patted the padded table where the client was meant to lie down. “Can I get you to hop up here, Loki? Need a hand?”

“I’m fine,” Loki said irritably. He easily hoisted himself up, swung his legs over, and lay back. “Now what?”

“Could you, uh... open your dress?”

“Ugh.” Loki loosened a couple of ties on his gown and it fell open. He shifted around until he’d exposed his tummy. “All right?”

“Yeah, that works. Are you comfortable?”

“Reasonably so.”

“Okay.” Bruce found a small sheet in a drawer and lay it over Loki from his hips down, giving him additional privacy. He then took up the transducer probe and tested the machine. “See, I’ll run this thing around on your stomach, and it’ll show the image inside you up on that screen.”

The screen in question was lit with snowy static. Bruce took a bottle of gel and showed it to Loki, indicating it would be rubbed on his skin. “This’ll be cold at first, sorry. Now, this won’t hurt, but I might have to press hard enough that it’ll be uncomfortable once in a while. Is that okay?”

“Just get on with it.”

“Okay, here goes.” Bruce began moving the probe over Loki’s tummy, observing the screen as he went. An image appeared, shaky and unclear, and the sound of a whooshing heartbeat filled the room. Tony stood by Loki’s side, and the two stared intently at the screen. 

“I don’t see anything,” Loki said, sounding disappointed.

Bruce nodded. “Yeah, I know, give me a minute to get the hang of this.” He made adjustments and moved the probe around more slowly. All at once, the picture on the screen coalesced and became clear, and Tony gave an excited whoop.

“Look! Look at that, babe! That’s... That’s our baby.” His eyes were wide in wonder as the grainy image of a perfectly-formed infant came into view. 

Bruce kept the probe moving. “Yeah, this is good. Aw, you can see the little face! Eyes, nose, mouth... Here’s the heart, beating nice and steady... Lungs, looking properly developed for this stage... Two arms, two hands, see, you can even count ten fingers. Now, let’s see if we can get a look at...” He slid the probe lower, and the three could easily distinguish the baby’s legs, feet, and toes.

And...

Bruce chortled. “Ha! Look there, right there, see? That, gentlemen, is a penis. You’re having a boy, guys.”

Loki peered suspiciously. “Are you sure that’s... all?”

Bruce looked even more closely, pressing the probe in harder. “Yup. I see no evidence of female organs of any kind.” He looked at Loki. “Disappointed?”

“That the poor creature doesn’t take after me in the genitalia department? Hardly.” He lay back, relief on his face. “Can you tell if it—I mean, he—has blue skin?”

“No, sorry, that’s beyond the scope of the equipment. But, as far as I can tell, he’s a normal-sized, properly formed fetus for the gestational period we’re working with. And...” Bruce dipped the probe lower on Loki’s body, frowning at the screen as he went.

“What?” Loki asked.

“Nothing. I was just checking something.” Bruce was trying to get the lay of the land as far as Loki’s internal organs were concerned. They were as expected, until Bruce got to the groin area. There, things got a little confusing, male and female plumbing tangled in with the rest. It took him a moment, but he was able to make sense of it. “Yes! Okay, we’re good. Nothing is blocking the, uh, exit for the baby. When the time comes, you’ll just have to change to your Jotunn appearance, and the kid’ll have a clear path. Whew.”

“Is that what you were worried about?” Loki asked in exasperation. “Of course there’s a ‘clear path,’ how do you think Jotunns come to be in existence in the first place?”

“Can’t say I know anything about that,” Bruce answered mildly. “I just wanted to get everything straight in my mind.” He leaned down and punched a button on the machine. It made a clicking sound before whirring into action, producing a series of photos of the fetal image. “Here you go. Baby’s first photo session.” He handed the pictures to Loki, watching with satisfaction as a broad smile came over the god’s face.

“Look, Tony. This is remarkable. The Aesir are so scornful of Midgard’s capabilities, yet there is nothing like this in all the realm. Fools.”

Tony took the photos and examined each one in turn. _“Wow._ Awesome.” He leaned down to address Loki’s stomach. “Hey, little guy! Got your portrait here! You sure are good-looking. Of course, look at who your parents are, but still. Someone’s got a side career in modeling ahead of him!”

“Gods, Stark, do shut up,” Loki said in amusement. “He’s going to be enough trouble without you turning him into a vain little prick before he’s even born.” The parents shared a laugh and a kiss while Bruce turned off the machine and stuck his mustache back on.

“All right, let’s get out of here before someone else comes along and we have to do the dog and pony show again.”

Loki sat up, refastened his gown, and climbed off the table, and then the three made a fast exit, breezing past the tech and the receptionist. “Sir!” she called, holding up a piece of paper. “Do you want your receipt?”

“Keep it!” Tony yelled as he zipped out the door. “Kazakhstan’s not picky about expense reports!”

The two women watched the trio leave and then glanced at each other. They shrugged, and went back to their usual duties, happy for a moment of peace and quiet before more clients came in.


	47. Uncle-to-Be Thor

_Shortly after Loki’s baby shower, a nearby university offered Jane a prestigious research position in astrophysics. She accepted, and promptly relocated to New York City._

_Thor volunteered to help her move._

********

Thor sat stretched out on the large overstuffed couch he had just carried up three flights of stairs. The Midgardians at the thrift store had moaned about how impossibly heavy it was; Thor had laughed, lifting it by himself with ease. No, for him—a god—it was little more than an awkwardly shaped bag of potatoes, and he’d scampered up the first two flights with no trouble whatsoever. Unfortunately, he’d misjudged a turn when he got to the third flight and stumbled, giving his ankle a severe sprain and dropping said heavy couch in such a way that it wedged itself between the stairway walls. 

He’d roared in pain, causing no less than three of Jane’s new neighbors to peek out their peepholes, but no one came to offer assistance. Thor had ordered Jane back inside and managed to wrestle the couch free, hobbling to drag it the rest of the way up and put it in its place in her apartment. He’d immediately plopped down upon it and put his injured ankle up, and Jane was now holding a bag of frozen peas on it, worriedly asking him if he was sure it wasn’t broken. Thor smiled in spite of the pulsing drumbeat of pain.

“It’s fine, my love. Just a twinge. Do you forget I am Aesir? It’ll be perfectly well in an hour or so.”

“That’s a little hard to believe,” Jane said. “It’s swelling like crazy. We should go to the ER and have it checked out.” 

Thor chuckled appreciatively. The Lady Jane was so cute when she fretted over him! “No, fair one. Trust me, it’s nothing. But if you’d like to do something for me, I’d have a cold glass of water. I’m positively parched.”

Jane looked up at him, frowning, but she nodded. “All right. Stay put, I’ll be right back.”

Jane returned with the water, and Thor threw it back in one gulp. Jane shook her head—Thor’s rate of consumption always astounded her—and she sat down at the other end of the couch, staring dubiously at Thor’s ankle. 

And so they sat in silence, that is to say, Thor sat in silence. At some point, Jane began talking, and Thor settled into a blissful state of drowsy contemplation as the throb in his ankle ebbed ever more faint and Jane’s voice washed over him like a gentle ocean wave. He had not the faintest clue as to what she was saying, but he loved hearing her voice, low and musical like the tiny birds that sang by his window back on Asgard. Oh, it was pleasant. Warm and happy, he might have slipped into a gentle nap, but...

One simple sentence stabbed through his consciousness like an ice pick.

“...so, you will be there, right?” Jane asked.

Thor blinked. “Uh... I beg your pardon? What did you say?”

Jane’s expression soured. “You weren’t even listening, were you? I said, they’re having a big fundraiser dinner for our department in a couple of months. All kinds of big shots’ll be there and everyone on staff is expected to attend. I don’t want to go all by myself.” She rolled her eyes at Thor’s bewildered expression. “Come on, this is kind of a big deal—it’s not as if I’m not giving you plenty of notice. Do you think you can make it?”

Thor straightened, frowning. “This sounds akin to a royal command to court.”

“Uh... I guess it is. Kind of.”

“Such affairs are very formal. I haven’t proper Midgardian attire.”

“Well, yeah, you’ll need a tux—”

“What is a ‘tux?’” Thor asked, his face scrunched at the unfamiliar term.

“It’s a dressy kind of suit. But don’t worry, I bet Tony knows where to get a nice one. Although, off the rack might be a problem...” she said, gripping Thor’s bulging bicep.

Thor grinned and proudly flexed the muscle under Jane’s slender fingers, but the frown quickly returned. “But, I’m not familiar with the etiquette for such an occasion.”

“Sweetie, you just have to be polite and... maybe not say very much. Just, you know, follow my lead and you’ll be fine.”

Thor still looked skeptical. “Loki always says I have terrible table manners, insofar as Midgardian customs are concerned.”

“Well, we’ve been working on that. You’re doing much better—by the time the dinner comes around, you’ll be using a knife and fork like a pro.” Jane watched Thor’s face for an encouraging sign, but he maintained a detached expression, apparently still mulling over the idea. “So, will you?” she finally prompted.

“Hm?”

A slight huff of exasperation. “I said, will you?”

“Will I what?”

“Make it to the dinner!”

“Oh! Well, I shall certainly try. When is it?”

“May 24th.”

“Well, that should be fine, I—” Thor stopped cold. May 24th? Hmm. Something about that date. What was it? He frowned, trying to remember—ugh, the Midgardian timekeeping system was so confusing. 

Jane carried on.

“From what I hear, the banquet’s really spectacular. You’ll love it. There’s free booze, too. Plus, we get to take our guests on a tour of the facilities, so you can see where I work. Oh, and I’ll have to buy a dress, damn it. Maybe we can make a day of it when we go looking for your tux. Oh, wait, I don’t have any shoes! That’s the real problem, and I hate shoe shopping...” Jane careened on, speaking of things that sounded to be of grave importance, but which meant little if anything to Thor, and he couldn’t concentrate anyway because he kept trying to think of the significance of that damn date.

May 24th. 

May 24th. 

May 24th... 

Oh.

_Oh._

Thor sat upright, disregarding the pain in his ankle. A very clear memory of Loki imperiously marching him into the Stark Tower kitchen and standing him in front of a calendar adorned with scantily-clad women came back to him. 

“Now, _look,_ Thor,” Loki had said after flipping forward to the page labeled “May.” “See? According to Banner’s calculations, the baby is due here—” One elegant finger tapped rapid-fire on the 24th square, the one viciously circled in thick black marker. “...and you’d better be close at hand, then as well as the week before, in case it comes early. I’ll not be bothered searching the Nine for you when I need you to go fetch Mother, do you understand?” Loki had turned a dark glower on him, and Thor had nodded solemnly. 

“Of course, brother. Worry not. I will not fail you at your most precious hour of need.”

“Well, you’d better not,” Loki had snarled, his eyes narrowed to sparkling green slits. “Or, the minute Stark’s get has left my body, I’ll use my seidr to turn you into the most wretched, limbless, _unholy_ creature this realm has ever seen and use you to deposit the leavings from my spawn’s diaper. Hear me well— _brother.”_

Thor had absently patted Loki’s arm, taking the threat in good stride. Loki had been... emotional lately, veering from silent and dour to weepy and sorrowful in mere moments, but this level of energy spiked with such viciousness was new, and Thor pitied the poor Man of Iron more than he ever had in his life.

Returning to the immediate matter, Thor regretfully took Jane’s hand. “I’m afraid I must decline, my sweet. That date has been reserved in service to my brother, as it is then when my nephew is due to arrive. I’m very sorry to disappoint you, but much depends on me and I cannot risk being unavailable. T’would be better if you found another companion for the evening.”

Jane’s eyes widened. “That’s Loki’s due date? Oh, wow, how exciting! Well, never mind, then.” She pursed her lips thoughtfully. “Maybe I can convince Dr. Selvig to go with me. I’m sure he’d love to see my lab. Although, he swore he’d never get within a hundred miles of Loki ever again. Fortunately, he doesn’t know he’s in Manhattan; maybe I can just leave that part out.”

“I’d advise it,” Thor agreed. He took her chin in his hand and gave her a gentle kiss. “Thank you for being so understanding.”

“Well, how often does a person get to help his pregnant brother? I think it’s fantastic, and I’m sure Loki appreciates you being there for him. I bet it’ll help smooth things over between the two of you.” Jane beamed at Thor and then she patted his knee. “How’s your ankle?”

“It’s fine,” Thor said bravely, in spite of the continued throb.

“Really?”

“Yes, I swear.”

“Great! Then, let’s go get the matching armchair!” Jane hopped up and went to the door, holding it open as Thor inwardly groaned. He hauled himself to his feet and gamely avoided limping, at least whenever Jane cast a glance at him.

********

After the calendar incident, Thor made a point of stopping by Stark Tower more frequently. Yes, Thor had a reputation for being an insensitive oaf, but that wasn’t really true; the thunder god had heard the worry and stress underlying Loki’s voice even as he’d threatened him, and Thor was determined to prove to his brother that he was reliable, dedicated, and fully on top of his uncle-to-be responsibilities.

Only to be met with venomous snarls, bitter insults and nasty cracks about his intelligence (nothing new in that, but it was the way Loki said them—he’d achieved a level of contempt that penetrated even Thor’s healthy ego.) Oh, and flying objects. Lots of them, some heavy, some sharp, all thrown with amazing accuracy. Well, accurate assuming the goal was merely to terrorize and bruise, not to kill. If that was Loki’s intention, Thor was amazingly lucky, many times over.

It occurred to Thor that if Loki was being so vicious with him, the Man of Iron might be in real danger. And indeed, now, with Loki’s hormone-fueled rage getting more and more out of control, Thor was beginning to fear for Tony Stark’s life.

He decided he’d better have a private conversation with him.

******

Thor called Tony and asked if they could meet, just the two of them. Tony readily agreed and invited him over, and although he sounded surprised, he didn’t ask questions. But when Thor arrived at the Tower entrance, Tony asked, “What’s the big secret, Hercules?” as he led Thor to the elevator that would take them up to the living area. 

Thor looked around surreptitiously, and asked “Where’s Loki?” in a none-too-quiet whisper. He had the air of a mouse on a mission to sneak out under the cat’s very nose, which mystified the hell out of Tony. He shot a probing look at Thor.

“He’s taking a nap. What’s the deal? You scared of him all of a sudden?”

“No, of course not,” Thor said with a small twitch. “This isn’t about Loki—it’s about you.”

“Me?”

Thor nodded vigorously. “Yes. I came to tell you that everything is going to be all right. At present, things may seem bleak—dangerous—utterly hopeless, even—but I want you to know, Man of Iron, that I am your friend, I am in your corner, and if there is anything I can do for you, you have only to say the word, and I will be by your side in an instant.” Thor hovered over Tony, sincerity emanating from his pores, and Tony folded his arms across his chest and stared. After a moment, he nodded.

“That... is great to hear. You’re a champ, big guy, and I want you to know I appreciate it.”

Tony’s words greatly pleased Thor, and he relaxed a bit and smiled. 

“But, would you mind telling me what the hell you’re talking about?”

Thor’s face fell. He knew he wasn’t the best at communicating in the Midgardian vernacular, but he thought his words had been quite clear. He cast about for a different way to say it. “I am merely offering you, eh, safe haven. A port in the storm. Sanctuary. Should you need it, I mean. Friend Stark—you are not alone.” Thor put his hand on Tony’s shoulder and gave a firm squeeze that kind of hurt, and Tony gingerly eased out of Thor’s grip while still nodding genially. 

“Okay... Well, that’s good to know, but I’m still kind of in the dark. Why would I need sanctuary? From what?” 

Thor pursed his lips, his eyes shifting from side to side. He then leaned closer and rasped, “Loki.”

Tony’s eyebrows shot up. _“Loki?”_ he said before breaking into a laugh. “Why would I need protection from Loki?”

“Please do not pretend with me, there is nothing you could say about my brother that would surprise me. Has he threatened you with harm if you tell of his abuse? Again I remind you, I am here for you, I can take you away for the duration if need be, or—”

“Abuse? Thor—Loki’s fine.” Tony put a hand on Thor’s arm and met his eyes directly. “I promise, I’m in no danger. Why would you think I was?”

“Has he not berated you?”

“Uh—”

“Has he not flung sharp, pointy objects in the general vicinity of your head, neck, or torso?”

“Uhhh—”

“Has he not threatened you with a series of dire bodily ailments once he again has the use of his seidr?”

The bewildered expression on Tony’s face deepened and he held up one hand to halt Thor’s onslaught of fears. “God, Thor, no. Jeeze, he’s been a little cranky now and then, who wouldn’t be in his condition, but no, for the most part, he’s doing great. What makes you think he’s, you know—bonkers?”

Just then, Loki sauntered into the front room. Thor’s eyes widened and he looked protectively at Stark as Loki approached the smaller man. 

“Hello, darling,” the trickster god said sleepily. He wrapped his arms around Tony and snuggled into him. Tony hugged him back and Thor observed a look of total contentment cross the man’s face as he lovingly rubbed circles on Loki’s round tummy.

“Hey there, gorgeous. Did you and Junior get enough sleep?”

Loki laughed. “Oh, never. But, the little one is restless, so I thought I’d come see what you were up to.” He put his hands at the small of his back, leaned back and stretched while regarding Thor benignly. “Hello, Thor, it’s good to see you.” He then went up to his brother, who braced himself. Thor rued the thought of having to defend himself in front of Tony, and of course he would do nothing to actually harm Loki, but he went on full alert as he clamped his muscles together, in case Loki decided to plunge a blade between his ribs or deliver a blow to his solar plexus with a force that belied Loki’s still-lanky frame.

But all Loki did was hug him. He gave Thor a sweet grin as he pulled away and asked, “Stay for lunch?” He went back to stand beside Tony, who slipped an arm around Loki’s waist.

“Yeah, we ordered a ton of Indian food. You in?”

Uncertain, Thor gave a slight nod, and Tony kissed Loki. He paused a moment, eyeing the two brothers thoughtfully before turning to stride away. “Uh, I need to make a few calls—you two chat, and I’ll meet you upstairs when the food gets here.” He disappeared down some stairs, leaving them alone in front of the elevator to talk.

Loki turned back to Thor and raised an eyebrow. “Is something wrong?”

A little thrill of ire rose in Thor’s chest. “I came in concern for the wellbeing of your mate, if you must know.”

_“What?”_

“Oh, please. You’ve been an absolute mountain troll to me every time I’ve visited lately. I’ve begun to fear for Starkson’s life.”

“Are you insane?”

“No, are you? You’ve raged at me, threatened me, and nearly took my head off with a meat cleaver! What horrors are you putting your poor mortal through in my absence?”

Loki was staring balefully at Thor, but he made a low chuckle at Thor’s question. “Ah. Now I see.” Loki strutted up to Thor. “Do you honestly believe I would ever mistreat Tony?”

“You once threw him out a window!”

Loki waved his hand dismissively. “Eh, that was before. Now, I love him. He’s everything to me. Even when this, this creature dwelling within me threatens to pulverize my innards, and tap dances on my bladder twenty times during the night, leaving me with an aching head and back in the morn, I would no more take out my pain and frustration on my love than I would purposely trample an exotic flower beneath my boot.” He gave Thor a pitying look. “How can you accuse me of such deviltry?”

Thor narrowed his eyes at his brother. “Meat cleaver. Here,” he said, indicating an area a mere inch or two beside his neck.

“Oh, don’t be so sensitive.”

_“Sensitive!_ I fear for my very life every time I come over here, I don’t think that’s being ‘sensitive!’”

“Thor, you’re my big brother. Haven’t I always been able to count on you? I admit, I probably haven’t been in the best mood when I’ve seen you lately, and, yes, I probably should, um, temper my behavior a little more, but really, have I been that bad?”

“Yes!!”

A hurt look crossed Loki’s face. He scrunched up his nose apologetically. “I have?”

“You’ve been a terror!”

“Oh. Well, I didn’t intend to be that way. It’s just that—with you, I know I can be myself. You’re Aesir, so I know you can take it. And you always make me feel so much better.” A hopeful smile came over him. “Please, don’t be angry with me. And, don’t worry about Tony. I would never do anything to harm him, especially since I’m lucky enough to have you, who can take anything I dish out. Right?”

Thor’s enraged expression softened. “Oh, Loki. Of course. I would just ask that you be mindful of my limitations. Sadly, I am no more immortal than you, and my flesh is subject to being rent by sharp metal blades, just as is a mortal’s.”

Loki looked unhappy. “But, flinging things is so _satisfying.”_

Thor frowned and pondered for a moment. Then, he brightened. “Jane tells me of a plastic Midgardian disc known as a ‘Frisbee,’ which can be flung with little threat of permanent injury. Also, a type of weaponry called ‘Nerf’ guns, which shoot soft harmless projectiles at even a great distance. I would be happy to arm you with such, and make myself available to you as a target when needed. Would that be acceptable?”

A wry grin crossed Loki’s face. “Well, that hardly sounds as gratifying as lobbing a well-placed glass paperweight, but I’m willing to give them a try. Perhaps you could offer some to Tony as well? It sounds like something he’d enjoy. I know there are times he’d like to take out his aggression in a harmless fashion. So, yes, please. Load us up.”

Thor smiled and wrapped his brother in a smothering embrace. Being Aesir was a source of pride for Thor, but clearly, it brought with it all sorts of difficult responsibilities. How nice to be able avail himself of Midgard’s wonders on occasion. 

If only they’d discover a way to defy the law of gravity where heavy articles of furniture and cute girlfriends were concerned.


	48. Where's Tony?

Loki was dreaming. 

Everything was sharply focused, hyper-real. Emotions came at him like a punch in the gut. 

Which was exactly what the evil dream-elf did to him. Loki was standing at the top of a mountain, slain enemies all around, a rush of triumph engulfing him at finally having made it through the fearsome battle using only his wits and his dagger. But as he turned, he saw the elf materialize before him and before Loki could take a breath, he drove his fist right into Loki’s swollen belly. The shock and pain caused him to double up and lose his footing—he tried desperately to throw out a hand to catch himself, but he was rolling, rolling down the craggy mountainside, and—

And, with a jolt, he woke up. He was breathing hard, and his eyes were assailed by the cool gray dawn giving way to a sunny sky outside the picture window in his and Tony’s bedroom. Loki squeezed his eyes shut and put a hand protectively on his stomach, still shocked by the vividness of his dream. _“Damn,”_ he gasped aloud. That phantom punch had been so powerful, but now the only discomfort he felt was a slight buzz in his lower back— strange, but not worrisome. He lay still until he came out of the dream-daze, and then snuggled back into his pillows, laughing at the absurd illusions the mind could play in sleep.

No, everything was all right. He was at home—home, he had a _home;_ after being unmoored for so long, he still marveled at that fact—in his bed, on a soft mattress under warm covers, fairly rested after a decent night’s sleep. He’d been sleeping better lately, the fetus having taken to moving in mild little shifts rather than with the violence that had so often wrenched Loki awake over the last few weeks. Banner said it was because the creature had grown too large to get any momentum going, and Loki supposed that was true, having noticed that his feet were now obscured from sight by the full mound of his tummy.

He rolled onto his side with a contented sigh. He actually felt pretty well. Stark had made love to him the night before, and it was as if Loki could still feel him holding him tenderly as he thrust inside him from behind. There was a time when Loki regarded his physical body as little more than transport for erotic pleasures, but as his pregnancy progressed, he often felt raw and beaten by the time he made it into bed. Now, he felt enormous gratitude for Tony’s gentle care, the intimacy being more valuable to him than the wild sexual exploits of his youth. 

He smiled as he reached over to touch his mate, but all he got was a fistful of bedclothes. 

That wasn’t so unusual—the bed was huge, custom made and bigger than a regular king-size. Tony often slept fitfully and would end up clinging to the edge on his side like a mountain goat, which made it a real chore for Loki to find him when he needed to be cuddled in the night. But now, Loki scanned the many lumps in the bedding, and deduced that he was alone.

“Tony?” he called, looking toward the open bathroom door. No answer. 

“Jarvis?” he tried instead. Again, no answer. Now, that was odd. The mechanical man _always_ answered when he called. Loki fumbled for his cell phone and punched Tony’s speed dial. There was a brief moment of elation at the sound of Tony’s voice, but that was immediately dashed when Loki realized it was Tony’s voicemail message. “Where are you?” he grumbled into the phone before slamming it down on the nightstand. 

He scrambled out of bed and pulled on a t-shirt and stretchy sleep pants. He stuck the phone in a pocket and then padded into the living area. He cycled through each room, alternating between calling Tony’s name and JARVIS’s, but neither brought any response. 

Loki knew Tony’s habits well enough to know it really wasn’t worth checking anywhere else but the lab. He got in the elevator and entered a code that would take him all the way down to the basement. Somewhere around street level, he thought he felt another little twinge, this time in his side. He absently rubbed it, his thoughts too focused on Tony to pay it any attention.

He entered the lab and looked around. Nothing looked out of place, but neither was there any sign of Tony. Loki yelled for him and walked around, feeling completely out of his element. He occasionally came down when he got bored or lonesome and Tony was gone too long, but he’d never tried to become familiar with the ins and outs of the space. Partly because it was a little like walking around inside Tony’s brain, and partly because it was, well, impressive, and Loki still liked to maintain a bit of superiority where Midgardian attempts to compensate for not having seidr at their disposal were concerned. 

None of that mattered at the moment, of course. It was obvious Tony wasn’t there, and that left the big gaping hole of a question—where the hell was he?

Loki strode out and took the elevator back to the living quarters, trying to quell a growing sense of panic. He was being an idiot, he knew that. But for Tony to be gone, and for JARVIS to be incommunicado—that suggested that something was wrong, really wrong. Tony had backups for the backups that powered his electronic lifelines, and it was highly unlikely they’d all fail at once. Which made Loki wonder—was someone in the house with him? Had someone disabled the system in order to come in and spirit Tony away? If so, why? And how would he ever get him back?

Or, maybe... 

What if Tony had left him? Just gotten overwhelmed at the thought of fatherhood, or, more likely, finally come to his senses about how foolish he’d been to get involved with Loki in the first place? Loki had heard stories about Midgardian men who’d left their families to go out to buy a newspaper, and then never returned. He didn’t really think Tony would do that—Tony didn’t read newspapers—but what if he did leave, it wasn’t as if he’d have any trouble disappearing while Loki was practically helpless, unable to make use of his _seidr._

Panic began to give way to anger. _How dare Stark leave him there alone, heavily pregnant, with no means of communicating with the outside world_ —oh. Loki patted the pocket of his sleep pants. Yes. The telecommunication device, he had that. He still wasn’t accustomed to using it for anything but calling Tony to demand that dinner be ordered at once, but he remembered that Tony had walked him through finding the speed-dial numbers for all sorts of useful contacts he’d programmed in for him—pizza, 9-1-1, Bruce, Pepper, Thor, Jane, the cable company, even Nick Fury, although Tony had cautioned him—and big time—on only using that one as a last, extreme, end-of-the-world scenario, desperation resort. Loki’s finger lingered over the number for a moment as he considered just how dire the current circumstances actually were, but then he scrolled down to Banner’s instead and tapped the number. 

The scientist answered immediately. “Loki? Are you all right?” 

“No,” Loki answered, sounding a bit more self-pitying than he intended. “I mean, yes, I’m fine, but I can’t find Tony. And, Jarvis won’t answer me. I don’t... I don’t know what to do. What should I do?”

“Did you try calling his cell?”

“Of course I did. He didn’t respond,” he snapped.

“Okay. Well, Pepper and I are right down the street, we’ll be there in a minute. Just stay calm.”

“All right.”

Bruce could hear the tension behind Loki’s words. “Loki—I’m sure Tony’s fine. Don’t worry.”

“Okay.” Loki hung up and stared at the phone. He felt better for having heard Bruce’s calm, even voice. The man could be unbelievably dreary, even tedious at times, but he had a way of making everything seem... controllable, somehow. Even so, Loki couldn’t help impatiently pacing around the Tower entrance as he waited. Moving seemed to keep him focused, and it distracted him from the occasional annoying stabby feeling in his back.

***********

Pepper looked at Bruce with concern. “What’s going on? Is Tony all right?”

“I’m sure he is, but Loki can’t find him. He probably just ran out to do an errand or something, but Loki’s a little on edge these days, understandably. He sounded pretty upset.”

“What does JARVIS say?”

“Well—he’s not responding.”

Pepper’s eyes widened. “Uh-oh. Come on, we need to hurry.”

“What? Why?”

“Because, if JARVIS is off-line and Tony’s AWOL? There’s a problem.” Pepper took off loping down the remaining two blocks to Stark Tower, with Bruce gamely jogging along behind her.

*******

The two stormed into the Tower, almost running Loki down. He recovered quickly though, and anxiously sought their eyes. “He’s still not here. What do we do?” he asked.

“The lab. Now.” Pepper spoke urgently.

“That was the first place I looked—Tony’s not down there,” Loki said irritably.

“You haven’t looked everywhere. Trust me, let’s go.” Ignoring Loki’s disapproval, Pepper called the elevator. As soon as the doors slid open, the three got in and took the car down to the lab.

Once there, Pepper strode to a metal-lined side wall. Frowning, she traced a line along the seemingly solid panel with her fingertips. After a moment, she pressed it firmly; a small compartment was revealed, and she leaned in toward a light shining within it. “Retinal image screening,” she explained. “Only Tony and I have permissions; he wanted to be sure no one else could access the surveillance system.” They heard a soft whirring sound, and then the entire panel slid to the right, displaying what appeared to be a large electrical closet, with circuit boards and rows of switches and buttons on the wall. Pepper stepped inside.

“Oh, God. He’s in here,” she called.

Loki was right behind her, and at the same instant, he saw Tony lying on the floor, eyes closed, mouth slightly open, jaw slack. He stared for a moment before asking, “Is he dead?” in a dull whisper. 

Bruce had crowded in past Loki and was already kneeling next to Tony, one hand on the pulse point of his neck. “No. No, he’s breathing, and his pulse is strong. He’s just been knocked out.” The relief was palpable in Bruce’s voice. He looked up at one of the circuit boards and pointed to where a small area was blackened. “I’ll bet he got a mild electrical shock and it jolted him backward.” Bruce swiveled and indicated a metal tool cart that was lying on its side a few feet away. “He must have hit his head on that and got knocked out.”

Bruce gathered Tony in his arms, and the billionaire began to stir. Bruce helped him sit upright, murmuring, “Hey, you’re okay, you’re okay. Breathe, just breathe. What’s your name? Where do you live? Who’s the President?”

Tony groaned, reaching up to feel the back of his head. _“Owww!_ What the _fuck?_ I’m Tony Stark, I live in New York City, and... the President? Fuckin’ ow, Banner, who knows, I don’t give a shit!” He grimaced deeply and now held his head in both hands. “What the freakin’ hell happened? My head feels like it’s coming apart! OW!”

Bruce examined the area and tsk’ed sympathetically. “Damn. That’s one hell of a bump, but the skin’s not even broken. Pepper, do you think you could get us some ice? And, some aspirin? This is going to smart for a while.” He continued to examine Tony, shining a pen light into his eyes. “I don’t think you have a concussion, but we need to keep an eye on you for a while just to be sure. What’s the last thing you remember?”

Tony had dragged himself into a sitting position against the wall and was now gingerly rubbing his injury. “Shit, I don’t know. Waking up. Wanting blueberry waffles. I called Jarvis, but he reported a sensor being out in the kitchen module, so... Yeah, I came down here to check it out. Don’t remember anything after that.”

“We think you got a small shock and fell against a cart,” Bruce said. “Does that sound right?”

Tony nodded, and instantly groaned again. “Uh, yeah. I’m not the best electrician when it comes to stuff like this. I take a lot of short cuts...”

“I’ve yelled at him about that for years,” Pepper said, handing Tony an ice pack, a cup of water and some aspirin. She then went over to where the overturned cart lay, bent down and picked up a pair of rubber work gloves, and dangled them in front of Tony’s face. “Look at this! I bet you’ve got twenty pairs of these, and you haven’t worn them once. You’re lucky you’re not dead.”

“Ow, I know, I know. I’ll wear the gloves from now on, I swear. Inside voice, Pep.”

“And, you shouldn’t do work like that without letting someone know where you are. Poor Loki couldn’t find you—I guess you never told him about your secret command station with the auto-close door panel,” she pointed out.

“No, I didn’t.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know, it just never came up. Ow.” Tony took the aspirin and then looked around. “I guess there’s a lot of stuff I should go over with him one of these days. Where is he, anyway? Is he okay? Get him in here, I need him to pretend to feel sorry for me.”

“He’s right here—oh.” Bruce said, looking over his shoulder to where Loki had been standing moments before, but wasn’t any longer. “Uh, Loki?” Bruce got up and went out into the lab, calling Loki’s name.

There was no answer.

******

Bruce helped Pepper get Tony to a chair in the lab and asked her to sit with him while he went to get Loki. He didn’t want the injured man riding in the elevator just yet. He gave her instructions on what to look out for in case Tony did have a concussion, and then he rode the elevator up to the living quarters of the Tower. 

“Loki?” he called as he strode out. “Where the hell are you?” He heard Loki answer, “In here.” 

Bruce followed the voice to Tony’s office and found Loki standing by the window, looking out into the city. Bruce regarded him for a moment; the god stood in his usual regal pose, except his posture was tilted back a bit, with one hand resting on his stomach, and the other supporting his back. He didn’t look at Bruce when he came in.

“Are you okay?” Bruce asked.

“Look at all those people. How can such a small island support all of them?” Loki mused. “The rate of consumption must be enormous. Where does the food come from? And, what about the trash? Where does it all go?”

“You know, I’d love to discuss the New York City waste disposal system with you sometime, but right now? Tony needs you. He’s asking for you.”

“Hm? Oh, of course. I be down in a bit.”

“Uh, no. Now. Come on, he’s in pain.” 

Loki didn’t budge, and Bruce stepped in closer. “Hey—what’s wrong?”

“All so fragile,” Loki said softly, still staring out the window. “I thought Thor had lost his mind when he took up with one, and now I’ve done the same. What fools we are.”

Bruce absorbed that for a moment, and then he nodded. “Okay. I get it. You had a scare and now you’re faced with the reality of Tony’s mortality. But, guess what, he’s still alive, and he’s waiting for you, so come on—”

“I’m well aware of his mortality, Doctor.” Loki turned slowly to face Bruce. “I knew what I was getting into right from the start, and I didn’t care. I was so... so desperate to have something _good_ in my life again. But, I’m not the sentimental sort, you know. I thought I could manage it, keep my heart shielded just enough not to ever be devastated by losing him.” Loki dropped his gaze to the floor. “Such hubris. The moment I saw him lying there, unconscious, helpless... I knew I’d failed.” He raised his eyes to meet Bruce’s. “He’ll be gone someday, and I’ll be all alone.” He shrugged his shoulders and gave a wry grin. “What’ll become of me?” 

“Loki...”

“No, honestly—what if he’d died down there? What would I do? Where would I go, me and my whelp?” Loki chuckled humorlessly. “I’d be out on the street, without the use of my _seidr._ I’d have to give birth in an alley, like a rat—”

“Oh, my God, you would not! You’re being ridiculous. You have friends, remember? Me and Pep, at the very least. And, I don’t know if Tony’s done anything about arrangements in the event he, uh, passed, but we’ll get him on that right away. I think this incident scared him, too, and he’s ready to—”

“That’s not the point. I mean, it’s very kind of you to offer your friendship, but you—you and Miss Potts—you’ll be gone someday, too, and there won’t be anyone—”

“I’m not so sure about that,” Bruce said in a grim voice.

“What?”

Bruce sighed. “Pepper, yes, unfortunately. But, me?” He shrugged. “Let’s just say, I’ve tried to... not be here. On purpose. And, it didn’t work.” He gave Loki a meaningful look, and Loki slowly nodded. 

“Ah. The green creature... I see.”

“Yeah. So, who knows? Maybe I just haven’t hit the right set of circumstances, but so far, the evidence suggests I’ll be around for a long, long time. So... Don’t worry so much. You and I might be tossing back a cold one together for hundreds of years to come.”

Loki stared incredulously at him for a moment, and then he laughed. “Well... That’s something to look forward to, I suppose.”

Bruce laughed, too. “Yeah, right. Listen, you’ve got a living, breathing Tony who wants to see you. How about it?”

“Of course. Of course, you’re right. Let’s go.”

The two headed out the door to the elevator. Just as the doors slid shut, Loki gasped and clutched at his side. “Damn...” he whispered.

Bruce turned to him, concerned. “What is it, what’s wrong?”

“I’ve been having these annoying pains all morning. I thought I'd slept wrong. But this, ugh... They’re getting worse. What could it be?”

Bruce gave him a dismayed look and huffed in exasperation. “Jeeze, haven’t you heard anything I’ve been telling you all this time?”

“What?” Loki asked, bewildered. “You tell me all sorts of dull things, I normally don’t listen after the first one.” All of a sudden, Loki’s eyes widened and he looked down at himself. “Oh, dear—how embarrassing. This hasn’t happened since I was a small child...”

“What are you talking about?”

“I, um, seem to have lost control of my bladder, somehow.” Loki looked up sheepishly, and Bruce looked down to see a puddle of clear liquid pooling at Loki’s feet. He shook his head.

“No, you didn’t. And, this confirms what I was just thinking.”

“Excuse me?”

Bruce looked pityingly at him, but he spoke kindly. “Loki—you’re in labor.”

Loki turned a little paler. “Oh,” he said with a gulp. _“Damn.”_


	49. Baby!

Loki recovered from the contraction and Bruce noted the time as they stepped out of the elevator. He gave Loki a concerned look. “We need to get hold of Thor, right? So he can get your mom?”

Loki nodded, gesturing impatiently. “Yes, yes, but first I intend to see Tony. Where is he?”

Bruce led him to a lounge area at the back of Tony’s laboratory, where Tony was irritably snarling and trying to force Pepper to take the ice pack, waving it around like a piece of bad fruit. Pepper was holding him down in his chair with her hands firmly on his shoulders.

“I have to get JARVIS back on line, now let me up!” Tony barked. 

“You have to sit still for at least thirty minutes, now settle down!” 

“Is our patient being uncooperative?” Loki asked genially as he approached.

Pepper gave a sigh of relief, and Tony visibly brightened. “Well, hey, kiddo—I know I get on your nerves sometimes, but did you have to knock me out?”

Loki smiled broadly. “If I’d been the one to knock you out, you’d still be in la-la land.” He awkwardly lowered himself to kneel next to Tony and gently cupped his face. “How are you, love?” he asked softly.

The gesture sent Tony’s spirits soaring. Yeah, yeah, he knew Loki loved him, but sometimes... Well, it was nice to see the look of genuine concern in his eyes. “I’m okay. I, uh... wondered where you were.”

Loki had the good grace to look ashamed. “I’m afraid I didn’t handle the sight of your puny mortal body lying unconscious on the floor very well. I’m so sorry. I should have remained by your side all along.”

A worried look crossed Tony’s face, but he quickly waved his free hand dismissively. “Nah... I’m sure you had better things to do. Speaking of which, am I keeping you from something? Filing papers, doing your nails, reading Shakespeare...?”

Loki started to make a snappy remark, but Bruce came up behind him. “Actually, Loki needs to make a phone call—or something. Right?” he asked meaningfully.

“Oh, uh, yes. Yes, I do.” 

Tony looked from Bruce to Loki suspiciously. “What’s going on?”

Loki casually smoothed back his hair. “Eh, well, according to the good doctor, I’m actively in the process of spawning your get.” He then struggled to stand up and fumbled in his pants pocket for his phone. He frowned distastefully as wet fabric clung to his legs, but he focused on scrolling down to Thor’s number, and then gave it a tap. He walked to the other side of the lab for quiet.

Tony’s gaze followed Loki’s receding figure, and then he turned to Bruce. “Huh?” he asked. 

“He’s in labor,” Bruce clarified.

Tony looked as if he’d been hit on the head again. “Labor? You mean, like, having-a-baby-labor?”

“Yeah. His water broke, and apparently he’s been having contractions all morning. But they’re not close together, and not particularly strong, so it’s not like it’s imminent or anything.”

Tony stared as he allowed the full meaning of that information to soak in. “Shiiiiiit...” he finally managed to croak. He shifted in his chair and sought Bruce’s eyes. “This is early, right? Too early?”

“Uh, well, no. I mean, yes, it’s a little earlier than expected, but not by much. Full term is 40 weeks, and we’re at 38 and a half. That’s not terrible, not by a long shot.”

“Not terrible,” Tony said blankly, letting the ice pack drop to the floor. “Okay—so, what do we do?”

“Loki contacts Thor, Thor brings Frigga here to do interplanetary midwife duty. I sweetly ask Pepper to run to the apartment and get my medical bag.” He gave her a hopeful grin, and Pepper rolled her eyes, but nodded in agreement. “And, once I’m convinced you’re not concussed, we take this party upstairs to where things are a little more hospitable and set up a birthing area.” Bruce pulled out his penlight and checked Tony’s eyes again. “How’re you feeling?”

“Like someone clocked me with a tire iron.”

“Good, that’s exactly how you should feel. Now, follow my finger.” 

“I beg your pardon?” Tony asked. “Do we really know each other all that well, Doctor?”

Bruce sighed, unamused. “Just do it.” He moved his index finger back and forth, up and down, and observed Tony’s response. “All right, that’s good. Now, stand up and let me see you walk.”

“Bruce.” Tony no longer sounded light-hearted. “I’m fine. It’s not like I haven’t been hit in the head before.” He looked over to where Loki was standing, talking on his cell and frowning irritably. “I have bigger and better things to worry about right now. Let’s go set up a birthing area.”

Bruce followed his gaze and nodded. “Okay. But, if you feel like you’re going to hurl, tell me.”

“Oh, I totally do—but not because of my head.” He gave a rueful grin. “It’s because I’m going to become a father.” He turned and looked toward Loki again. “To... something.”

“It’s a baby, Tony.”

“Yeah. You say that like it’s a good thing.” 

Bruce chuckled and called to Loki. “What did Thor say?”

Loki strode back, shaking his head in annoyance. “Oh, the big simpleton started crying.”

“Seriously?”

“Oh, yes. He has a sentimental streak several furlongs wide. I had to remind him that I’m actually in need of his assistance for a change. It took a moment, but he’s on his way to Asgard now. He should return in a couple of hours.”

Tony flinched. “Do we have that kind of time?”

“Have you had another contraction?” Bruce asked Loki, and Loki shook his head. “Then, we’re good. Things could change, of course, but this being a first pregnancy and contractions being this far apart, we should have several hours before things shift into high gear.” 

And, maybe a lot more than that, Bruce thought grimly. Or, less. He had no idea how any of this was going to go—who knew how long Jotunns were likely to be in labor? It was all very confounding, but he kept a neutral expression on his face. Both Tony and Loki were looking to him for guidance, and the last thing they needed was to suspect that he felt uncertain. He took Tony’s arm as he stood up and shadowed him to the elevator in case he became unsteady, but Tony appeared to have mostly recovered from his injury.

They took the elevator up to the living quarters, and Pepper ducked out to get Bruce’s medical bag.

******

“And what, exactly, do you expect me to do now?” Loki asked, his hands on his hips and a displeased sneer on his face. 

Bruce had suggested they use a twin-sized bed for Loki to lie on so that it would be easier to minister to him from both sides if necessary. There was only one in all of Stark Tower, and it was in a tiny far-away spare bedroom. When Pepper returned, she and Bruce wrangled it into the living area, where they would be close to both the kitchen and a bathroom. Plus, there was plenty of room for whatever contingency might arrive from Asgard. 

Bruce had commandeered a sturdy table and set up the various pieces of equipment he’d been collecting for the last several weeks in anticipation of the blessed event. Now, there really wasn’t much left to do until Thor returned with Frigga, and/or Loki began having regular contractions. Bruce shrugged at the god’s question and gestured at the bed.

“Honestly, it’s up to you. Feel free to lie down if you want, but it’s probably a good idea to walk around as much as you can, while you can. Also, eat a light snack if you’re hungry, and stay hydrated. Oh, and make sure you note the time when you have another contraction.”

Loki gave him a doleful look. “May I shower? I feel disgusting.” He was still wearing his amniotic fluid-soaked pajamas.

“Sure. Just be careful not to slip and fall—Tony, maybe you should help him.”

“I can do that,” Tony said briskly. “Come on, space man, let’s get you cleaned up.” He held out an arm and Loki grinned as he took it. 

“No shower shenanigans, Stark. I’m in labor.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it, babe. Just want to keep you safe.” The two looked at each other with such tenderness that Bruce couldn’t help but smile. He would never have thought Tony capable of being so nurturing, and certainly not with Loki of all people, but here they were. He ruefully nudged back a tinge of envy and turned to Pepper.

“Pepper, is there a basinet or something? I’d like to have it handy for when the baby arrives.”

“Yes, in the nursery. I’ll go get it.”

“Thank you. Also, could you get some towels—a bunch of them? And, an extra blanket, in case Loki gets cold. Please.”

Pepper took a moment to hug him. “Feel free to order me around as much as you need to. I’ll play nurse, gladly. But, as soon as I’m done hunting and gathering, I need to go back down to the lab and get JARVIS back on line.”

“Wow, you can do that?”

“Of course. I’m not the expert Tony is, but I can replace a couple of fuses and sensors. And, I’ll wear proper safety equipment.” She flounced her hair and gave Bruce a smug look as she headed out of the room.

Bruce watched her leave, impressed and appreciative. “You’re amazing,” he called after her.

“I know!” her voice drifted back.

Bruce grinned.

******

Hours passed. Loki, freshly showered and clothed in a soft white tunic over dark green pants, dourly paced around the living quarters, pausing occasionally to pick up a decorative object and scowl at it as if it were personally responsible for his troubles. Tony perched on a bar stool, sipping a club soda with lime and staring distantly out the window. Bruce and Pepper played cards on the couch. Traffic sounds provided a comforting hum, and somewhere a clock ticked.

“Where the hell is Thor?” Loki suddenly demanded, one hand grasping his side.

“Is that a contraction?” Bruce asked, grabbing a pen and the pad of paper he’d been using to note Loki’s pains.

Loki squeezed his eyes shut, but managed to maintain an otherwise stoic face. “Yes.”

“Are they getting harder?”

“A bit.”

Bruce frowned, biting his lip thoughtfully. “Okay. Listen, Loki—I need to, uh, check how far you’re dilated.”

Loki was relaxing after the bite of the contraction, but he raised an eyebrow disdainfully. “I beg your pardon?”

“Aw, come on, man—we discussed this.” Bruce shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “I need to give you an internal exam.”

“Oh, right, I do recall something about that. Well, let me put it this way— _no.”_ He ambled off to the other end of the room.

Bruce gave Tony a pleading look. “It’s really important to know where we are in the process.”

Tony slid off the stool and walked toward Loki, but Loki turned and held up a hand in warning. “No, Stark. I will not submit to his Midgardian attempts at control. I’m fine, and no one will touch me until my mother arrives.” He cast a glare at Bruce. “You will not deliver this creature, Doctor, and I will not assume my Jotunn form until it’s absolutely necessary. So, put those notions out of your head.”

Tony looked back and forth between the two men helplessly, and then shrugged at Bruce. Bruce consulted his watch. “Where _is_ Thor?” he said, half under his breath. Pepper patted his hand and spoke equally softly.

“It’s still okay. The contractions aren’t very close together, right?”

“Yeah... It’s just, I thought we’d established some trust. That seems to have gone out the window.”

Pepper put her head closer to Bruce’s. “This is hard for him.”

“I know. But, it’s not like it’s going to get any easier.” He took in a deep breath and then they went back to their card game.

*******

Two more hours passed, and Loki was beginning to feel like a prize boar in an Asgardian livestock auction, what with everyone hovering around, observing his every move and facial expression, and then talking among themselves, speculating on what they might mean. 

He didn’t feel well. The labor pains were taking more and more out of him, and it was getting harder to pretend that he was taking them in stride. In a way, he wished he could disappear into a cave and do this in total isolation, free to writhe on the ground and scream and curse as much as he liked. But, having Tony at his side was comforting, and as much as he disliked having Bruce see him in this weakened and vulnerable state, it was good to know there was someone with birthing experience handy if things began to go amiss. Still, as the hours wore on, he felt a ball of tension growing in the pit of his stomach.

And, in truth, his contractions were still unhelpfully far apart. 

He wished his mother would get there already.

************

Steve Rogers stopped by to check in, not having heard a word from any of the other Avengers for some time, and was duly informed of the current situation by Bruce. Steve’s eyes widened and he hastily began looking toward the exit, but Bruce put a hand on his arm and led him out to the hall to talk, a grave expression on his face.

“Frankly, I wouldn’t mind if you hung around a while.”

Steve swallowed hard. “Why?”

“Well, Loki’s contractions are irregular and don’t seem to be productive. His blood pressure’s fine, and his and the baby’s heart rates are still good, but I’m beginning to worry that labor might be stalled, and Loki’s not cooperating with me at all. If things get dicey, I may need you to run interference in getting him to a hospital.”

“What about Tony?”

“He’s a little fried. He’s just trying to keep Loki calm, which is becoming more and more of a challenge.”

Steve took a deep breath. “Okay. Just keep in mind that I’m kind of squeamish about babies being born, anyway. If I had to watch _Loki_... I have a feeling that’s not the kind of thing a guy recovers from very quickly.”

“Yeah, well, I doubt it’ll come to that. Just stick around until we know what we’re dealing with.”

“All right—will do.”

They went back to the living room and after some small talk, Steve joined Bruce and Pepper’s game.

Tony had put on soothing music and was now resolutely walking the floor with Loki, one arm around his waist, cajoling him to keep going until he complained of being too tired. Tony then led him to the little bed and helped him lie down. He cuddled beside him and rubbed his back, keeping up a stream of jokes and conversation that Loki didn’t seem to appreciate in the least; but when he stopped, Loki plaintively said, “Keep talking to me. It’s annoying as hell, but it keeps my mind off of other things.” And, Tony resumed his patter in a soft gentle tone, and Loki closed his eyes and burrowed miserably into a pillow.

*******

After another hour passed, Pepper quietly walked around the bed and tapped Tony’s shoulder. He gave her an inquiring look, and she indicated he should meet her out in the hall. “I’ll be right back, baby,” Tony said to the half-dozing Loki. He slipped out of the room and went up to Pepper.

“What?”

“Bruce is really worried that things aren’t progressing. Have we heard from Thor?”

“The last two times Loki called, he didn’t answer. Loki thinks he’s in transit, but... it’s hard to say.” Tony looked uncomfortable.

“Something may have happened.”

“No, no way. It can’t. Loki’s counting on his mom to help him. He doesn’t want Bruce—”

“I know, but there may not be a choice. He needs to let Bruce examine him. If he’s not having strong enough contractions, Bruce can give him some medicine to move things along.”

“He won’t want that.”

Pepper didn’t bother to argue, but her face said everything. Tony sighed. “I’ll go talk to him.”

It took a long time. Tony sat next to Loki, tightly embracing the god. Bruce, Steve and Pepper left them alone and went to the kitchen for a snack, but they could hear raised voices from time to time. Finally, Tony came to find them.

“He says okay,” was all Tony said.

*******

Bruce hurried back to the makeshift birthing area, with Pepper and Steve behind him. Loki had already shifted to his Jotunn appearance and was staring out the window, jaw set, eyes narrowed. A current of air blew his long hair away from his face and ruffled the fabric of his tunic. He turned when the three came in. “Just you,” he said to Bruce. When Pepper and Steve had left the room again, he added tonelessly, “Do what you need to do.”

“Okay. It’ll only take a moment. If you could undress below the waist and lie back, please? Here, let’s cover you with this blanket.” Bruce put on latex gloves and waited until Loki was lying comfortably on the bed. “Would you like Tony to sit beside you?”

Loki nodded, his mouth a grim line, his eyes fixed on the ceiling. Tony sat down and took his hand, and Bruce performed the exam, taking care not to appear to gawk at what was beneath the light cover. But he had to look in order to find his way around properly. It was a different sight than he was used to, certainly—nothing so odd as to be difficult to navigate, but strange. Still, once he became accustomed to Loki’s physiology, he was able to quickly assess his progress.

Which wasn’t much.

“Well?” Loki demanded when Bruce removed his hand from his body and began cleaning up.

“Uh—you’re only dilated to three centimeters. That suggests we’ve got a long way to go, and since your water broke, well... in humans, that means there’s an increased risk of infection. I don’t know if it’s the same in your case, but regardless, I’d like to start you on a pitocin drip to induce labor.”

“No.”

Bruce sighed. “I understand, and I don’t blame you for being reluctant. We don’t have to do it right now. But, if your contractions don’t improve and you stay at three for another hour, I’m really worried that both you and the baby may face some real difficulties later.” 

The strain was beginning to show in Loki’s face and he just grimaced and turned to Tony. Tony gathered him in his arms and held him. “Maybe you should walk around some more,” he said gently.

“I’m tired,” Loki said, his voice uncharacteristically weak. “I just want to lie here for a while.” 

Tony looked to Bruce, and he motioned for Tony to come to him for a word. “Let him rest for a few minutes, but if things don’t get moving pretty soon, it’s going to be a problem.” He put a hand on Tony’s shoulder. “If he ends up needing a C-section, I can’t do it here. We’ll have to get him to a hospital.

“No!” Tony snapped. “I don’t want him being exposed like that, or our baby, either. We can’t.”

“I know, I know, I understand. We need to do everything possible to avoid it. So—you’re going to have to help me convince him to let me use the pitocin.”

“Not yet, you said.”

“No, not just yet. Let’s see what happens after we get him back on his feet for a while.”

“I’ll walk him all over this town if it’ll help,” Tony said grimly.

“I hope it will. But—”

A low rumble sounded outside the tower. Both men stopped and raised their eyes to the big picture window, where a dark lightning-filled cloud had inexplicably moved in over their little portion of the otherwise sunny city. Loki sat up in the bed, indigo lips spread taut against white teeth in a humorless grin. “Ah, Thor, the Ever-Tardy... When this is all over, I’m going to turn him into a chinchilla and trim my boots with his fur.” 

A sharp crack of thunder was followed by a dull floor-shaking thud on the roof of the tower, and Tony spoke to the air. “JARVIS? Are you alive?”

“Yes, sir, I am, thanks to Miss Potts.”

“Yeah, well, sorry I didn’t take care of you myself, but I’ve been a little busy. So, do we have visitors?”

“Indeed we do. Mr. Thor and some others. They’re in the elevator now.”

“Cool. Thanks, buddy, and sorry about the off-line thing.”

“No apologies necessary. The brief outage left me feeling quite refreshed.”

“Wish I could say the same. I—”

Just then, the elevator doors slid open. Thor strode out along with Frigga, who was toting a large tapestry bag. They were followed by Farbauti and Alfarin; Farbauti also had a pack slung over her shoulder, as well as a sheathed hunting knife around her waist. Loki rose and walked to them as quickly as he could. He threw his arms around his mother and she held him close, smoothing his hair and murmuring into his ear. He pulled away, a genuine smile on his face as he turned and nodded to Farbauti. “I see you made a side trip,” he said to Thor.

“Heimdall has been observing your situation. Mother thought it well to bring Queen Farbauti along for her expertise, considering the circumstances.”

Loki took the queen’s hands in his. “It’s good to see you, Your Highness.”

The regal Jotunn smiled ruefully. Her thoughts had been with her long-lost son almost constantly since she learned of his existence, and hearing the formal address jarred her into recalling that, from his point of view anyway, they were little more than brief acquaintances. “Please, call me Farbauti.” She squeezed his hands. “Loki.” She knew he wouldn’t appreciate her calling him “son.”

Loki greeted his grandfather with a small bow before stepping away from the group. “So, you all concur with Dr. Banner—that my labor is not progressing as well as it should?” He turned, his face studiedly blank.

Frigga went to stand before him. She lay her hands on either side of his belly and closed her eyes. The whole room became quiet and a soft sizzle of energy seemed to travel between the two. When she opened her eyes, she had a worried look. “This happens sometimes. I’ve brought a tea that will help your body harness the energy needed, as well as ease the pain.” She opened the tapestry bag.

“Wait!” Farbauti said sharply, reaching into her pack. “I also have a potion for pain relief, and mine is no doubt more suited to the Jotunn constitution than yours. Besides, given the situation, Loki will need more than a mere soothing analgesic, don’t you agree?”

“I beg your pardon?” Frigga asked.

Farbauti shrugged, and pulled the fearsome-looking knife from her sheath. She held it up and admired it before speaking, not noticing the sudden tension in the air. “When we remove the child from Loki’s womb,” she said, running her thumb alongside the gleaming blade, “even a great warrior such as he will need something to dull the pain.” 

Loki’s blue skin seemed to pale. “Wait a minute, you don’t seriously think I’m going to let you—” He faltered as a contraction jolted him, and when it lessened, he hissed under his breath at Frigga. “You’re not going to let her perform Jotunn-style surgery on me, are you?”

“Of course not,” Frigga answered quietly. She now pulled herself to her full height, brow furrowed in dismay. “Your Highness, please, I’m quite certain that such measures won’t be necessary!”

Farbauti stopped short and gave Frigga a shocked look. “Surely you don’t expect him to suffer the cut of the knife with no pain abatement! And, you call us monsters! Even the Jotunn are not so cruel as to inflict such misery on our birth-givers!”

“No, no! I mean, we won’t have to resort to a blade in order for the child to be born. It will happen naturally.”

At this point, Bruce stepped up. “Ladies, please, listen. Loki’s contractions haven’t been very productive, and he’s gotten really tired. I’m afraid the baby might get into trouble if we don’t move things along, and I have medicine that’ll do that. And, if surgery does become necessary, we’re going to have to take Loki to a hospital—there’s no way we could do it here.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, mortal,” Farbauti said scornfully, casually brandishing her knife in his direction. “We’ve no need of your weak Midgardian potions, nor do we need to move Loki away from the comfort of his palace. I’ve performed dozens of such procedures, from the battlefields of Jotunheim, to the filthy swamps of Muspelheim. Trust me, little one, I will deliver Loki of his child swiftly and cleanly. I—”

“No way!” Bruce snapped, forgetting that he was speaking to the queen of a warrior people, so upset was he by the thought of attempting a C-section outside of a proper operating room. “That’d be disastrous! I—”

Farbauti pulled herself into her towering full height. Frigga got between her and Bruce, Thor got between Frigga and Farbauti; Steve Rogers tried to be heard, using a calming tone, but voices were raised, and the entire room seemed to rumble with the roiling emotions of gods and men. But somehow, over the din, Tony’s commanding voice penetrated everyone’s ears.

“Hey! _HEY!_ Everybody pipe down!! You’re upsetting Loki!” 

Everyone became quiet and they looked around to see Loki sitting on the edge of the bed, his arms wrapped around his swollen belly, his head dropped low, rocking back and forth. “Tony. It hurts,” he said softly. 

That was as close as Loki ever came to asking for help. Tony rushed to his side and pulled him into his arms, looking disapprovingly from Bruce to Frigga to Farbauti. “Come on, you guys. Isn’t there something you can do to make him feel better?” 

“I told you, we can put a stop to his misery in mere moments,” Farbauti snapped, holding up her knife.

“And, I told you, you’re not touching him with that shank!” Bruce retorted. The two looked as if they were about to go head-to-head, when Frigga stepped between them again and held them apart with a hand on each one’s shoulder.

“All right, enough,” Frigga said firmly. “We mustn’t fight. And, I do not believe surgery will be necessary. I have another method that should not only ease Loki’s pain, but will bring about the birth as nature intended.”

“And, what would that be?” Farbauti asked suspiciously.

Frigga turned to Tony. “You have bathing pools in this realm, yes?”

“Uh—well, we have pools. And bathtubs. What exactly did you have in mind?”

“Loki needs to submerge his body in warm soothing water.”

“Wait, you want him to give birth under water?” Tony asked, looking slightly horrified.

Bruce’s irate expression turned thoughtful. “It’s okay,” he said slowly. “It’s a technique a lot of people are turning to. I’m afraid I don’t have any experience with it, and of course the medical community isn’t particularly in favor of it. But, there are a lot of advantages if you have someone knowledgeable guiding you.”

Farbauti looked skeptical. “I’ve never heard of such a method. How can it be safe?”

Frigga went to sit on Loki’s other side, and she put her arm around his shoulders. He slumped against her, and she gently rubbed his back. “The bathing area should not be remote or excessively deep. The parent is in no danger, and when the child arrives, it is still attached to the umbilical cord, so it will not inhale until it’s exposed to air. It suffers no trauma. And, Loki will be able to move about freely as he labors, as the water will make him feel weightless. It’ll be much more comfortable for him.”

Loki made a low grunt, and grabbed his side as a fresh assault of pain flashed through him. When it abated, he said tiredly, “Well, I wish something would make me more comfortable. Mother, I’m willing to try this idea if you’ll be by my side.”

Frigga nodded. “The baby is strong, and in the proper position. We should get started as soon as possible.” She looked at Bruce. “So, does this at all mesh with your Midgardian teachings, Doctor?”

“Yes, ma’am. And, we still have some time. Let’s do it.”

A resolute look crossed Frigga’s face. “Where is this ‘bathtub’ you spoke of?” she asked Tony.

“Come on, I’ll show you.” He led the way to the master bathroom, a huge room with a sunken marble tub that could easily hold four people (and had, once, a long time ago, Tony thought with a smirk.)

“‘Twill be no fun, hauling heated water,” Farbauti said thoughtfully.

“Oh, no, see, we have, uh, water heaters. It’ll get hot right out of the tap.” Tony leaned down and ran some water, gesturing for Farbauti to put her hand under it. She gave Tony a dubious look, but held her hand under the stream for a moment, nodding as she realized the temperature was getting warmer.

“Fascinating! I had no idea you Midgardians were so advanced. This is quite convenient.”

“Well, we like it.” Tony crossed his arms awkwardly. “So, you want me to get this filled up with warm water?” he asked Frigga.

“Yes, please. About to here,” Frigga said, bending to indicate the fill line she had in mind. “But, not too hot. And, these lamps will never do.” She began pulling candles out of her pack. She placed them all around and waved her hand, lighting them all at once while the electric lights dimmed to almost nothing. An invigorating citrus-y scent began to fill the room. “We need music.” She looked at Farbauti.

“Yes. My father is in charge of that.” She cued Alfarin, who took a small instrument out of his robe and went to sit in the bedroom, out of sight but close enough that low soothing notes of some sort of flute wafted into the bathroom. Loki looked around, impressed by the transformation of the familiar room. 

“Well, this is different.”

Frigga nodded. “Loki, dear, you may disrobe and get in the water whenever you’re ready. We’ll step out to give you privacy, but Tony should help you so you don’t slip.”

“All right.”

When they were alone, Tony took the hem of Loki’s tunic and carefully lifted it, helping him slip it off. He knew Loki didn’t really need help undressing, but he hated feeling useless. He steadied Loki as he slid out of his pants, and then guided him into the water.

“Are you sure about this, babe? Don’t let them talk you into something you’re not comfortable with.”

“No, it’s fine. My fath—Odin robbed me of my history and knowledge of my bodily functions. I can only trust those who seem to care for me, that they know what’s best.” He didn’t speak bitterly, Tony noted; he just sounded resigned. “I certainly don’t.”

“Okay. But, just remember—I’ll be by your side every second. If something seems wrong, just give me the word. I’m not going to let anything happen to you or the baby.”

Loki smiled and caressed Tony’s cheek. “I know.” He then stepped into the bath’s more shallow side. He perched there and settled in, letting a low moan of pleasure escape his lips as he sank into the warm water. He closed his eyes and leaned back. A look of peace came over him, and for a moment there was silence except for the soft drone of Alfarin’s flute.

“This is most relaxing,” Loki said eventually.

“Good.” Tony knelt by the side of the tub and squeezed his arm. “You stay put. I’m going to change into swim trunks and then I’ll join you.”

“All right.” Loki had a quiet moment to himself as he adjusted his Jotunn form to the warmth of the water and calmed his mind, letting the music and the scent of the candles guide his thoughts. Soon, Tony returned and slid in next to him. Frigga came in and knelt beside Loki. 

“Are you comfortable, my son?”

“Yes, Mother. This is very good.”

“Tell me when you have another pain.”

Loki nodded without opening his eyes. Time seemed to slow down and he could feel some energy return to his body. Another contraction gripped him and he reached for Tony’s hand, bracing himself, but he noticed that his mind felt less scattered as he rode out the wave.

His mother brought him a cup of tea flavored with honey. “Drink this, darling. It’ll take the edge off the pain.”

“It won’t hurt the baby, will it?” Tony asked worriedly.

“No,” Frigga said gently. “It’s ancient medicine, completely safe.”

Loki drank, and then Frigga slipped off her dress, leaving her in a simple gown. She joined Loki and Tony in the tub and took Loki’s hands in hers. “Now, Loki, I want you to breathe with me. This also will help you manage the pain.”

Soon, the effects of the tea took hold, and Loki felt himself relax even more. When the next contraction came, it was stronger than the ones before, yet the pain was no longer sharp and stabbing, but rather a binding feeling that seemed within his power to control as long as he breathed as Frigga had taught him. 

Frigga and Farbauti took turns sitting in the tub, massaging Loki’s back and keeping him chatting when he seemed to want conversation. From time to time, Bruce managed to persuade Loki to let him check how far he was dilated, and after the third check-up, he was relieved to announce that Loki was now at eight. Frigga put her hands on Loki’s tummy again and ascertained that the baby was still doing well; Bruce backed up her assessment with a fetal heart monitor. He took Loki’s blood pressure and heart rate, and smiled. “They’re both doing great,” he said. “I don’t think it’ll be much longer now.”

Tony got out and put on a robe. He went to update everyone in the living room. The tense mood instantly lightened as Pepper, Thor, and Steve whooped in relief.

*******

In time, Loki felt the baby shift within him. Now, it felt as if the child was determinedly pressing at his quim from the inside, demanding to be let out. He knew that wasn’t really the case; still, he felt an overwhelming ripeness in his groin, as if the baby was about to slip between his legs at any moment. He looked sharply at his mother. “I think the baby’s coming. _Now.”_

Frigga checked his belly and grinned. “Not quite. He’s in position. But, you mustn’t push.”

“I want to push,” Loki said evenly.

“I know, but it’s not time just yet.” 

With his mother’s encouragement, Loki had tried moving from one position to another in the water, keeping himself from stiffening up and also learning to listen to what his body was telling him. Now, he turned to face the edge of the tub, resting his weight on his arms and his knees. It felt right and natural, and he decided that was the pose he’d assume when it came time to push. Suddenly, he felt a great wrenching burst of pain from deep within his core. He cried out, and Frigga and Farbauti both spoke to him comfortingly, the Jotunn queen rubbing his shoulders and back with her large strong hands. “It’s all right, young one. Your insides are opening up for the baby—as they should. It won’t be long now.” 

Tony had taken a break, but hurried in when he heard Loki’s anguished cry.

“Everything okay?” he asked.

“We’re getting very close,” Frigga said serenely. “Tony, can someone bring towels and a blanket, please? We’ll be needing them soon.”

“Yeah, we’ve got ‘em ready. Yo, Pep! Where’re those towels?”

Pepper came in and quickly recreated the setup Bruce had had back in the living area. It was alarming to hear Loki making choked-out grunts of pain. She managed to catch his eye and gave him an encouraging smile. He had the look of a wounded animal and didn’t appear capable of acknowledging her, so Pepper just eased out of the room. She started to fetch the basinet, but scratched that idea when she realized just how many people there were ready and eager to hold the new arrival. It would probably be a while before anyone was willing to relinquish him.

******

Another hour ticked by, and Loki seemed to turn inward, wholly focused on dealing with pain and fighting the urge to push. He wouldn’t talk and answered questions with only a shake of his head, at best. Suddenly, a dark look came over him. He looked at his mother, his eyes flashing. “This. Baby. Is. _Coming,”_ he said, biting off the words. “Do _not_ tell me not to push.”

Frigga hastily moved next to him, put her hands on his stomach and closed her eyes. Then, she nodded. “Yes, my love, it’s time. Do it. Push.”

Loki got in position and gave a strong heave. He could feel the baby traveling down within him. He tried to listen to his mother’s instructions as she paced him, telling him when to give another push, but it was more and more difficult to maintain control. Plus, his energy level was close to depleted. 

“Push, Loki,” his mother said firmly.

“I can’t,” he said weakly. “I just can’t.”

“Yes, you can, babe.” Tony was right beside Loki, keeping a hand on his back for comfort. “I know it’s gotta be tough, but you can do it. You’re the freakin’ god of mischief, right? You can kick one little trickster out of the nest! Come on, baby, let’s do this.” He nuzzled into Loki’s neck and whispered, “Let’s meet our son!”

Loki’s wet hair was hanging in strings around his face and his deep red eyes looked near tears. But he nodded, and took a deep breath. With a loud groan, he put everything he had left into a hard push, and Frigga gave a shout of excitement. “We have the head! The head’s out, darling, now just a little more. I know you’re exhausted, but we’re so close. One more push, my love, one more...”

Loki wasn’t sure where the strength came from, but he managed one more push and he felt the baby slip out of his body. He was able to reach down and clasp the tiny child in his hands, while Frigga held him around his shoulders, whispering instructions. “Bring him up slowly, dear, don’t jerk the cord.” Loki swiveled around and carefully brought the infant upward, until his little head was clear of the water. Loki stared. His skin was a creamy pale blue, faint tribal ridges on his cheeks and forehead. Otherwise, he appeared just as any human baby looked in its first moments on the planet—damp and round and wrinkly.

“Oh,” Loki said softly. “He... He’s not breathing.”

“Slowly take him all the way out of the water.”

Loki awkwardly maneuvered the baby into his arms and against his chest, sitting up straight. After a moment, the little one began grimacing and a tiny, mewling noise escaped his lips, followed by a healthy newborn cry. The pale skin seemed to flush slightly pink, and then became a deeper blue.

Everyone laughed in relief, even Loki.

“He’s fine,” Frigga pronounced, one hand on her grandson’s head. She reached for Tony’s hand, and replaced hers with his. The genius inventor looked as if an angel had touched him. After a moment, Frigga asked him, “Papa, will you cut the cord?”

Farbauti handed Tony the scary Jotunn knife, and he gingerly took it. He listened to Frigga’s instructions and then cleanly sliced through the umbilical cord, just where Frigga indicated. She tied it off while Tony stared at his baby. He didn’t see blue skin or ridges; he saw two gorgeous dark eyes, blinking curiously; reaching fingers, wriggling toes, and a little frowny face that already appeared to be trying to figure things out. Tony looked at Loki and smiled crookedly.

Their son was beautiful. 

“He’s perfect,” Tony said. 

“He’s... alive,” Loki said disbelievingly, feeling the energy of the babe’s life force spark through him.

“Of course he is,” Farbauti said, looking on approvingly. “He’s magnificent! Just look at him, strong in body and spirit, in spite of his mortal blood! He will be a fine warrior, just as you are.”

Loki didn’t bother to respond. He just held his son against his own skin, two shades of blue, and wondered at the silky feel and the indescribable scent of a newborn.


	50. Meeting Everyone

Loki could tell the entire living area was now filled with movement and noise—ugh, _so_ much movement, _so_ much noise—voices rising and falling, laughter, feet tromping, doors opening and closing, a “pop!” and the clink of glass as someone poured champagne. Even there in the bathroom, his mother and Farbauti spoke in hushed but excited tones, and he could hear Thor at the door, vainly trying to whisper as he pleaded for a glimpse of his freshly-birthed nephew.

But in Loki’s mind, the world was just his son’s little face in clear focus while everything else rushed past in a blur, like countryside through the window of a speeding train. 

Then, he was vaguely aware of Farbauti fussing around between his legs, chortling, “And now comes the afterbirth!” and feeling something warm and squishy being pulled from him. He paid no attention, just noted that everyone seemed pleased that _that_ was done, and at last he was allowed to sit quietly, Tony’s arms wrapped tightly around him, sheltering their little one between them.

Until his mother settled beside him. “I need to clean him up, dear.” She held out her arms expectantly, but Loki didn’t move, didn’t take his gaze from his baby’s clear dark eyes wondering in amazement. He didn’t notice Frigga cast a rueful glance at Tony. “He’s going to get cold, Papa. Perhaps you could persuade him...?”

Tony nodded. “Hey, Daddy-bear, give up the goods. You can’t hog him forever, you’ve got a damn fan club here waiting to get a look at the little goober.” Tony gently lifted Loki’s chin and refocused his eyes on himself. “So, gimme.” He carefully wrested the infant away from Loki, and by the look on the god’s face, it occurred to Tony that if it had been anyone else, they might have come away minus a hand. But he managed to transfer the tiny baby from Loki into his own arms—and then he didn’t want to let go, either. 

Frigga sighed, repressing a chuckle. “You poor dears. I know how hard it is to let him go. But, this won’t take long, I promise. Please.” She again held out her arms.

With a resigned scowl, Tony reluctantly placed his son into Frigga’s waiting hands. She smiled and cuddled the squirming infant before wrapping him in a fluffy towel and taking him to the sink for his first bath. 

Tony turned his attention to Loki, who was slumping lower in the water, wearing a dazed expression. “Come on, babe. Let’s get you out of here—you need to get dry and into bed. You must be exhausted.”

Loki gave him a slight nod of acknowledgement and allowed himself to be helped to his feet. He felt shaky, and a shiver ran through him as his knees gave way. “Bruce, give me a hand!” Tony yelled as he struggled to keep Loki upright. Bruce hurried over and between the two of them, they were able to get Loki safely out of the tub and into a bath robe. Farbauti swathed him in a blanket as well, and they made their way to Tony and Loki’s bedroom, where they helped Loki lie down under the covers. Tony dried Loki’s hair with the towel and made sure he was warm and comfortable. 

Gentle hands, a warm blanket, a soft bed... Loki dropped off to sleep almost immediately.

******

In the living room, the chatter rose and fell as people came and went. Steve had called Natasha to give her the news, and she’d hurried over with champagne and a stoic-faced Clint in tow. Thor had indeed managed to sneak a peek at his nephew and he entered the room grandly, his booming voice ringing out as he described every detail he’d been able to glean in those few short moments.

When he was done, everyone was strangely quiet, staring up at the big blond god. He looked around, bewildered. “What is it, my friends?” he asked. “Has the news of my nephew’s birth disturbed you in some way?”

Steve glanced at Natasha and then cleared his throat. “No, not at all, it’s just that, uh...” He shrugged uncertainly.

“Thor—you mean, he’s really... blue?” Natasha asked delicately.

Thor nodded. “Well, of course. This is not cause for surprise, surely? Loki’s Jotunn flesh is most pronouncedly blue.”

“Kid’s going to have a bad time of it in kindergarten,” Clint said somberly. 

“Maybe they’ll home school,” Pepper said.

“Oh, what, and keep him hidden away as if there was something wrong with him? I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.” Natasha spoke sharply, bad memories clearly cloying her thoughts.

Bruce came in, wiping his hands dry after washing up. He caught the gist of the conversation and said gently, “Hey, guys? This really is a joyous occasion. Let’s not worry about that kind of stuff right now, okay? Tony and Loki’ll figure it out. In the meantime, we need to give the new parents our support.” He glanced back over his shoulder, still hearing some good-natured bickering going on between Frigga and Farbauti regarding how to best swaddle the infant before taking him to his dads. “It’s not like things aren’t weird enough for them already.”

Thor gave an earnest nod. “After all, it is just a baby, no matter the hue of his skin,” he said reasonably.

“That’s right,” Natasha said. She elbowed Clint in the side. “Right?”

Clint hastily sat up straighter. “Oh, uh—yeah. And, babies are... cute.” Everyone made enthusiastic sounds of agreement, and didn’t hear when Clint leaned over and whispered in Natasha’s ear, “Even if one of their daddies is a freak from outer space...”

“Shut. Up,” Natasha said around a smile. She turned back to Thor. “When do you think we’ll get to see him?”

“Ah, Mother said he must first be given nourishment.” Thor’s happy smile faded and a thoughtful frown came over him. “Although, I’m not certain how that is to be accomplished. Babes only feed on milk, do they not?”

Pepper and Natasha exchanged amused glances. “Yeah, that’s the impression I’ve always gotten,” Pepper said, nodding seriously.

Thor looked down at his chest as mildly horrified understanding came to him, and then back at the ladies. “But Loki is quite ill-equipped!”

“Not necessarily,” Bruce said. “Aside from the fact that he did just, you know, give birth—males are capable of lactating, under certain circumstances. And small-breasted women can nurse their babies just fine. So, I imagine Loki’s equipped perfectly well. Now, whether or not he’ll choose to do it is another question entirely.” Bruce smiled and sat down on the couch, ready for a bit of non-Loki-related quiet time.

Everyone else awkwardly milled around, trying not to think too much about men lactating, until they found comfortable places to sit and wait for the new arrival to appear.

*******

Loki’s sleep was deep but all too brief, as he was awakened when he felt Tony get up and leave the bed. He heard a baby cry and jolted upright, instantly hit with pain and a wet sticky feeling between his legs. Without thinking, he flicked back his hand and sent magic flashing to the sore place, instantly healing the torn skin and removing the drained blood and fluid—and then his eyes widened in horror at what he’d done. He pulled his legs under himself and looked around the room in a frantic search for whatever—whoever—had received the worst of his ill-managed _seidr._

But, there was nothing. Not a knick-knack out of place, and the voices of Frigga, Farbauti and Tony, still in the bathroom, never missed a beat. He stared anxiously in their direction until Tony came in, smiling broadly and carrying their squirming son in his arms. 

“Hey, beautiful! Someone’s hungry! Pull up the blinds, get the diner open for business!” 

“Wh-what?” Loki asked, his brow knit in confusion. 

“Your son wants feeding, my love,” Frigga said gently. 

Loki stared from one to the other, his heart being tugged by his son’s cranky little wails, but a rush of irritation came over him as he grasped what they were implying. “Are you insane? All of you? I’m not...” The exasperation flooded out of him as he caught a glimpse of the baby’s face, squished up in misery. His voice shook a little as he continued. “I’m not doing that. I’m male, in spite of all this. I’m... I’m not doing that.” He wrapped the robe a little tighter around himself and shot a glare at Tony. “There has to be another way to nourish the creature.” 

“The ‘creature?’ So, we’re back to that again? Oh, brother. Loki, if you don’t—or can’t—nurse him, we’ll get some formula. No biggie,” Tony said as he sat next to Loki and rubbed his back soothingly. “I’ll get Pep to run down to the drug store, it’ll just take a minute.” 

“But, he’s hungry now,” Loki said. 

“What is this ‘formula’ you speak of?” Farbauti demanded, looking at Frigga, who gave a rather un-queenly shrug of her shoulders, as she’d never heard of such a thing, either. 

“It’s this,” Pepper said from the bedroom doorway. She was leaning in, about to knock with one hand, holding a filled baby bottle in the other. “May I come in?” 

“Absolutely! Hey, bring that here, this is like the infant version of pizza delivery, isn’t it?” Tony said with relish. He gave Pepper a worshipful look as she approached. “You always know what to do, don’t you? You’re kind of a genius—like me, only with feelings and shit.” 

“It didn’t take a genius to figure out this scenario,” Pepper said dryly. “When I went to get Bruce’s stuff, I picked up a bagful of formula and bottles, cleaning supplies, everything. But, you two are going to have to figure out how to use them.” She handed the bottle to Loki. “First one’s free, but after that... it’s on you.” Now that she was close enough to see the baby, she leaned down and marveled at him. “Wow... he’s gorgeous! Aw, and so hungry—feed him, Loki!” 

Loki had the baby in one arm and held the bottle uncertainly with his other hand. He frowned. “What do I do?” 

“Stick that,” Tony said, pointing to the nipple on the bottle, “in there,” he added, now pointing at the baby’s now wide-open shrieking mouth, secure in the knowledge that that was how it worked. 

Loki glowered at him, but Pepper gave him instructions so the baby wouldn’t suck in air, and Loki did as directed. Loki discovered that if he squeezed the bottle, a little formula came out into the baby’s mouth, thus giving him the incentive to start sucking, and soon enough the baby was contentedly nursing and Loki was staring at his son in awe. 

Tony looked as proud and triumphant as if he’d just harnessed cold fusion. 

Frigga and Farbauti both had slightly disapproving looks on their faces. “Is that substance safe?” Farbauti asked Pepper. 

“Of course!” Pepper said reassuringly. “It’s got all the nutrients a baby needs. And, if this doesn’t agree with him, there are lots of different kinds. He’ll do fine.” 

“Perhaps I should bring several flasks of Jotunn yak milk,” Farbauti mused. “It’s what we use when a parent dies in childbirth, or battle, or what-have-you.” 

“I’m not dead,” Loki said sourly. 

“No, of course you’re not,” the indigo-skinned queen said, flashing a loving smile at Loki. “And, if you choose to trust these, uh, humans’ notions of childcare, well... I will support you in that. But, if my only grandson fails to grow fat and strong in a timely manner, I’ll—” 

“I know, I know—yak’s milk,” Loki said with a twinkle. “I doubt that will be necessary.” 

“We’ll see,” Farbauti answered. 

The five of them silently watched the baby nurse, sucking down the formula like a tiny little machine. When he was done, Frigga showed Loki how to put him on his shoulder and help the little one bring up a burp, making everyone laugh. Loki gave a loud squawk of mock-disgust when he was subsequently spit-up on. 

“Oh, this is dreadful,” he said, laughing as his mother dabbed at the wet pool on his shoulder. “Stark, you should begin working with this fluid immediately—I believe you have a chemical agent here to rival anthrax.” 

“No one ever died from a little baby puke,” Pepper pointed out. 

“Not yet. I haven’t weaponized it,” Tony said confidently. 

A brisk rap came at the bedroom door and the group looked up to see Thor forlornly standing there. “May I hold my nephew now?” he asked pathetically. “The others would like to see him, too.” 

“Sure, Point Break. Here.” Tony carefully took the baby from Loki and walked him to Thor’s waiting arms. 

“Oh, just look at him!” Thor said as he settled the babe against his broad chest. “He’s beautiful!” His jovial mood returned and he busied himself examining the little fingers and toes and grinning until he thought his face would break. “What’s his name?” 

Tony and Loki glanced at each other, and Tony tugged at his beard. “Uh... We never did nail that down, exactly. We thought we had a little more time.” 

“May I suggest ‘Hjálmarr?’” asked Frigga. “It means, ‘helmeted warrior.’ Appropriate, don’t you think?” 

“Oh, that’s very good,” Farbauti agreed. “Don’t you think so, Father?” 

Alfarin had been cautiously peeking in every so often, afraid of being shooed away by the women, but now he happily stepped into the room and went to look at the baby in Thor’s arms. “Indeed! A fine, strong name. He can be ‘Jari’ for short.” 

“Uh...” Tony said, a helpless tone in his voice. He really didn’t know quite how to explain to his in-laws that he had no intention of calling his son something so, well, odd-sounding. But, Loki spoke up. 

“Mother, that is truly a fine family name. But, the boy will grow up on Midgard, and trust me, he’ll be different enough from the other children as it is. He doesn’t need an unusual first name as well.” Loki reached for Tony’s hand. “How about ‘Jacob?’” he asked softly. 

A smile tugged at the corner of Tony’s mouth. “Jacob? Huh. I like that. But, why?” 

Loki shrugged. “It’s a very old name, from the Midgardian book known as the Bible.” An impish grin crossed his face. “Jacob wrestled with God. That sounds like something our son would end up doing.” 

Tony chuckled and pulled Loki close. “Okay. So, Jacob Hjalmarr Stark.” He whispered in Loki’s ear. “We’ll wait ‘til he’s older to break the Hjalmarr part to him, right?” 

“As you wish,” Loki whispered back. “The Old Ones will call him Jari, anyway.” 

“Fair enough. Come on—let’s go introduce Jacob to the rest of the gang.” 

Loki stood up, and assumed his Asgardian form, but he looked worn out and bedraggled, with the blood-streaked robe and his straggly hair. Frigga smiled encouragingly and squeezed his arm. 

“Are you feeling all right, dear? Any pain?” 

“No, not at all. I...” Loki looked around and then leaned in to say confidentially, “I used my _seidr_ to heal myself before I became fully awake. Nothing bad happened, did it?” 

Frigga looked surprised, but she shook her head firmly. “No. Now that the baby isn’t reflecting your magic, you should be able to use it as you wish. But, I’d go slowly, son. You’re a bit out of practice.” 

Loki looked down at himself, and in an instant, the soiled robe was gone and he was dressed in crisp black slacks and a green tunic. His hair was clean and neatly combed away from his face in his usual style. He smiled, well-pleased to have the use of his magic at last. “It’ll come back to me fairly quickly, I think. How do I look?” 

Frigga laughed ruefully. “Would that I could have returned to my old appearance so quickly after having a baby! It took me months. You look wonderful, Loki. But, I’m afraid your guests will only have eyes for your little one. You’ll have to get used to not being the center of attention, I’m afraid.” 

Loki took in a deep breath. “That... is fine with me. I’ve had enough attention to last a thousand years.” He held out his arm, and Frigga took it. “Come. Let’s see how our guests are faring.” 

Together, they headed to the living quarters to watch the joy of everyone meeting little Jacob. 


	51. Chapter 51

A/N: Hello all! This is just a short little chapter, but I figured I'd better post it while I had the chance. We're almost to the end! As always, thank you so much for reading, for the kudos, and comments.

*******

Thor was holding court, his tiny nephew easily cradled in one arm. Since there appeared to be no threat of the infant having the Jotunn power of turning humans into popsicles, he very generously allowed each of the waiting team members to take an up-close look at Jacob, proudly proclaiming them to be the tyke's "Aunt" or "Uncle," by way of introduction. Natasha cooed something in Russian to the baby and stroked a sky-blue cheek; the baby instantly turned his face in that direction and tried to nuzzle her. 

"Oh, crap," Natasha said in English. "I'm in love. Thor, let me hold him!"

"In a moment, my dear. Let the Captain have a look."

Steve stepped forward and tentatively peered at the small face before breaking into a big smile and saying "Hey—welcome to the world, little guy!" He put his finger in Jacob's tiny fist, and the baby instinctively gripped it, making Steve laugh in amazement. "Gosh, he's strong! He'll be a tough one in the ring someday!"

Thor laughed too, and then turned his gaze to Clint. "Hawkeye? Come, meet the newest Avenger!"

Clint hung back for a moment, but then curiosity got the better of him, and anyway, Natasha gave him a tiny-but-effective shove and he moved closer, frowning, his eyes locked on the little half-alien infant. It was a good thing he was prepared for the blue skin, or he might have said something to earn a nasty growl from Thor; as it was, he took in the sight and was captured by the beautiful dark, knowing eyes staring back at him. He took a deep breath. "He's a little small to handle a bow and arrow right now," Clint said slowly. "But when the time comes, I can, uh... I can show him a few things. If his dads want me to."

"I'm okay with that." Tony walked in, followed by Loki with Frigga on his arm. Tony turned to give Loki a mild look of warning. "How about you, Daddy-Bear?"

Loki left Frigga's side and strode up to Thor. He gave his brother a small grin. "If it won't pain you too much, dear Uncle Thor, I'll take my son now." 

Thor looked a bit chagrined at the thought of Loki ripping the tiny creature away from him, but then he broke into a huge grin himself. "Of course, brother. He's a fine one. I daresay you couldn't have done better."

Smiling, Loki gathered Jacob into his arms and turned back to Clint. "Well, Barton, I'm grateful for your kind offer. I can't think of anyone more suited to train my son in the ways of the archer." Loki stood straight and tall, but without the mocking glint in his eyes he so often reserved for potential nemeses. He offered a hand to Clint. "It would, in fact, be an honor."

Clint held Loki's gaze for a long moment. He didn't trust the guy, and probably never would. But this wasn't a time for friction, and Tony's encouraging expression helped him to reach out, take Loki's hand, and give it a firm shake. "Yeah, well. Don't want him to pick up any bad habits while he's learning." _Don't ever want him to question which side he's on, either. Not if I can help it._

Loki's grin deepened, as if he could hear Clint's very thoughts, and he nodded agreeably. "Of course. Very farsighted of you. Again, my thanks."

There was a snap of tension as Clint internally questioned whether Loki was back wandering around in his brain, but it passed when Bruce and Pepper, and then Farbauti and Alfarin, came to join the group. Natasha wasted no time relieving Loki of his little bundle—"I've got to grab him before the grandmas get a hold of him again," she said—and she whisked Jacob off to the couch to get the full baby-effect of cuddling and snuggling him. Pepper was right behind her, and Frigga and Farbauti watched genially, waiting their turn to claim more time with their grandson.

Tony pulled Loki to him. His love looked suave and gorgeous, but Tony knew him well enough to sense when he was putting on his game face. "Tired?" Tony asked gently.

Loki had a fond expression on his face as he watched the women crowd around Jacob, but it faded at Tony's question and he ruefully drew his brows together. "I'm exhausted. I was able to use my _seidr_ to heal myself, but nothing can make up for my depleted stores of energy. I... I feel I could sleep for days."

"Well, you'll never have a better collection of babysitters on hand than you do right now. Go, lie down, sleep—I'll make sure Romanov doesn't sneak off with the kiddo."

Loki snickered. "I think you'll have more trouble with Mother and Farbauti, but all right." He turned to go to their bedroom, but paused and looked back at Tony. "May I have a word, first?" He tilted his head toward the door.

Tony nodded and followed him to the bedroom.

*********

They walked in and Loki closed the door behind them. He put his arms around Tony's neck and looked into his eyes. "I have to say this now, or I never will. No one has ever loved me as you do. No one has ever taken care of me the way you have. You've been by my side through one of the most challenging experiences I've ever had, and you've brought me nothing but joy and kindness. I-I've never done very well in relationships, but I promise—I will not fail you, Stark. I don't know how to show you the depths of my gratitude, but please know, you and Jacob are my life now. I'll do anything to keep both of you safe—and, if at all possible, happy—as long as I am alive."

Tony just stood there, stunned. Loki was free enough with his affection and he'd let Tony know how he felt about him in a lot of ways, but verbal declarations were rare. The genius didn't quite know what to do, so he gave a careless shrug and said, "Well, maybe you could start by not making poor ol' Clint think you're still controlling his frickin' mind. For a minute there, he looked like he was going to have a heart attack."

Loki dropped his arms and laughed. "Oh, come on, I have to have a little fun." But then, his mood became serious again and he nodded. "Of course, you're right. I still have many bridges to mend, and tempting as it is to play at lighting Barton's short fuse, I should behave better. And, I will." He dropped his voice, as if speaking only to himself. "Tsk, if only he wasn't so easy!" He somberly stared at the floor and shook his head wryly before looking up and giving Tony a cheeky grin, his eyes dancing with the old mischief. Tony had to resist the urge to wrestle him to the bed and get him out of his dapper, well-fitted garments. Instead, he cleared his throat and motioned at the bed.

"Will you please go take a nap? You just had a baby, for God's sake, I'd think you'd have better things to do than drive me crazy!"

Loki chuckled as he made his way under the covers. "I have many better things to do, but not many of them bring me as much pleasure as driving you to distraction. Now, give me a kiss and go see to our son. I hope he's not like a duck, imprinting on all the wrong people."

Tony leaned down and kissed Loki, at first chastely, and then deeply, their tongues finding each other and causing lightening strikes of excitement to charge between them. Tony pulled back and eyed Loki appraisingly. "Hey, so, you're all healed up, right? Does that mean we can...?" He waggled his eyebrows lasciviously.

"Get away from me, Stark," Loki said with a theatrical sigh of doomed exhaustion as he pulled the covers over his shoulder and turned on his side, away from Tony. Tony mock-pouted and began to head back to his guests, but as he made it to the door, he heard Loki call after him. "Tony?"

"Yeah?"

Loki was sitting up, a sly grin on his face. "Maybe tomorrow."

Tony smiled back, ready to make a snarky comment. Instead, his grin softened, and he nodded. "You're amazing, babe. I love you."

The wickedness faded from Loki's expression, and he gave Tony a genuine smile. "So are you," he said with what sounded like wonder. "I, uh... love you, too."

"Good. Now, go to sleep. I'll see you in a little while." Tony winked and left the room.

Loki settled back under the covers and quickly fell unconscious, still feeling Tony's warm lips on his.


	52. What Doesn't Kill You

Tony surveyed his living room, barely able to keep a sneer from forming on his lips. 

Alfarin and Bruce were standing at the bar, deep in conversation about some space thing involving astrophysics, from a Jotunn point of view. Thor was nodding, eyes closed, in an easy chair; Hawkeye was sacked out on the couch. Pepper, Natasha and Frigga chatted, with the baby snuggled in Frigga’s lap. Farbauti had been in the middle of them, but now stood nearby, engaged in a spirited discussion about America with Steve, her eyes sparkling as he described some of his war experiences.

Tony sighed. Okay, it was nice, he guessed, having all these people—the extended family he’d never had—gathered together, getting along, helping with the brand-new baby, giving Loki time to rest and recover from the birth. But, dammit, when would they ever go _home?_ And when would he have a chance to take care of the kiddo himself, without three or four women cooing and clucking over his every move? 

Yeah, fine, so he didn’t have a lot of experience with babies. And, sure, there were all kinds of screw-ups just waiting to befall him, like making the formula too hot—or too cold—diapers to put on backwards, picking up the kid when he wanted to be put down, putting him down when he wanted to be picked up, and oh, the worst, apparently, NOT HOLDING HIS HEAD UP PROPERLY. Sheesh, you’d think he was letting the little Jakester poke a fork into an electrical socket, the way Natasha had screeched at him, like, fifty times. _Hey, Tash, I’m new at this, okay? Cut me some slack!_ he’d pleaded, but she’d watched him like a hawk for the rest of the evening.

Although, he hadn’t actually had much of a chance to screw up anything, because the grandmas were pretty well in constant possession of the infant, like a couple of football players protecting the ball from the opposing team. Every once in a while, they’d grandly announce, “It’s Papa’s turn to change him!” and then they’d generously hand the little bundle over to Tony. Yeah, like that was their good deed for the day, letting Pops change a poopy diaper. Thanks muchly, ladies. 

But now, here it was, what, midnight? Jeeze. Tony was beginning to come down from the caffeine and baby-having high he’d been riding the last few hours, and he felt the need to crawl into bed next to Loki—sleepy, delicious-smelling Loki—and crash. But no one was making the slightest move to leave, and—

“Want me to clear the room?” Pepper sidled up next to him and spoke in a conspiratorial voice. 

“Bless you, ma’am. Yes, please. Make ‘em all go away. Except for the kid, I’ll keep him.”

Pepper chuckled. “I’ll send the locals home, but I think Thor is beyond making another intergalactic trip tonight,” she said, gesturing toward the now snoring God of Thunder. “How about I get the outer space folks to turn in here for the night? I already had JARVIS make up four of the guest rooms.”

“Sure, that’d be perfect. Hell, everybody can stay if they want to—it’s not like we’re short on beds. And we can meet for brunch in the morning.” 

Pepper shrugged. “Okay, I’ll give ‘em the option. Hey, everybody? Listen up, it’s time to give Tony the baby.” She watched as absolutely no one paid any attention to her. She cleared her throat loudly. Still nothing. She hopped up onto the coffee table and dramatically raised a hand in the air, saying “May I have your attention?” until everyone quieted down and looked at her. “Thank you. Now, I repeat— _it’s time to give Tony the baby._ That’s right, hand him over... Very good. All right, here’s how the sleeping arrangements are going to work...”

With tact, grace, and the uncompromising will of a steelyard foreman, Pepper managed to herd everyone away from Tony and Loki’s living area, sending the Asgardian and Jotunn visitors to a separate wing and offering guest accommodations on a lower floor to everyone else. Clint and Natasha bowed out and headed for home. Bruce wanted to stay, just in case there were any post-natal complications, and Pepper decided to head home for a little peace and quiet. On her way out, she was only mildly surprised to hear Steve hem and haw for a moment, only to find that instead of heading downstairs with her, he went to meet Farbauti in the hallway and took her arm as they strolled towards her bedroom. 

******

Tony walked into his dimly-lit bedchamber, a swaddled Jacob nestled against his chest. He pulled the basinet close to the bed and carefully laid the infant in it. He leaned down and planted a kiss on the tiny forehead, and then wearily began undressing. When he was down to a t-shirt and shorts, he slipped under the covers and pulled Loki into his arms. “Hey, babe.”

Loki made a guttural noise that could have been pleasure or could have been grave annoyance, but he lay his head contentedly on Tony’s shoulder. “Where’s the baby?” he asked in a groggy whisper.

“Right here by the bed,” Tony answered, running his hand down Loki’s back. “He’s sound asleep, probably as exhausted as we are. Suffering from grandma fatigue, I bet.”

“Mmm.” Loki pressed a kiss onto Tony’s chest and snuggled in. Then, his head shot up and he looked at Tony, aggrieved. “Wait, is Mother gone? Did everyone leave?”

“No, no,” Tony said, kissing Loki’s forehead. “Your folks are all settled in the guest suites. You’ll see everybody in the morning.”

“Oh.” Loki smiled crookedly. “Well, thank you for your kind hospitality, love.”

Tony gave a soft chuckle. “Hey, don’t use words with more than two syllables on me at this hour. Gets me kind of hot...”

Loki laughed, too. “Hush, you. Get some sleep. I imagine tomorrow will be another busy day.”

Tony responded by wrangling Loki closer to him and promptly falling asleep. 

Loki waited until Tony was lightly snoring. He then gracefully disentangled himself from his love’s embrace and slipped out of bed. He walked around to the basinet, reached in and picked up his sleeping child. He nuzzled Jacob’s soft cheek and kissed him, inhaling him. The baby made a little coo of satisfaction, and Loki took a pillow and blanket and went to settle in the big easy chair by the moonlit window, cradling his son carefully so that he could sleep safely in his father’s arms.

*****

Morning came early for Loki, with the baby’s squirming and demands for food, and the sound of people talking and moving around in the living area. He placed Jacob on Tony’s chest while he freshened up and pulled on a robe. When he came back, Tony was up, gently bouncing the fussy lad on his shoulder and shushing him. “Hold on, bub. Daddy’s going to take care of you. See, here he comes.”

Loki couldn’t stifle a huge grin at the sight of Tony, clad in rumpled underwear, face pillow-creased, hair sticking up in all directions, making awkward dance moves in an effort to calm the now screaming infant. He shook his head in amusement.

“Here, for Norn’s sake. Stop, stop moving about so. As if that were helping anything,” Loki chided as he took Jacob into his arms. “I think you’ve made him sea-sick.”

“Nu-uh. I’m a world-class cha-cha master, I just have to refine my technique for the under 48-hours-old class.” Tony grinned back at Loki and reached for a kiss. “Go take care of the boy. I’ll get dressed and join you in a few. But be careful, you’re on your own fending off the grannies.”

“Oh, they’re nothing. It’s Thor I’m worried about. He’s already a bit too fond of his role as uncle. I may never get Jacob away once he clamps his meaty paws on him.”

Loki strolled elegantly into the living quarters and was immediately rushed by his mother, Farbauti, and Thor. Loki managed to keep the shrieking baby under his command as he gave each of the three a hopeful look. “Would one of you please prepare the formula for Jacob? I believe these pathetic wails indicate the early stages of starvation, and I suspect it’s only going to become more deafening if he isn’t seen to.”

Both Frigga and Farbauti cast uncertain glances at each other; neither knew their way around a Midgardian kitchen. But Thor stepped forward. 

“I shall do it,” he said confidently. “The Man of Iron has versed me in the use of the microwave heating device. Don’t worry, little nephew, I shall return forthwith with your meal.” 

“Hold on there, Point Break.” Tony strode in, comfortably dressed in a t-shirt and jeans. “I showed you how to use it _once,_ and then you blew up a can of soup the next day. Not that I don’t trust you, but let me help you with the finer points, like not nuking a baby bottle to smithereens.” Tony clapped a hand on Thor’s back and escorted him to the kitchen.

Loki sat on the couch, temporarily having shushed the baby, and Frigga and Farbauti joined him. “How are you feeling, darling?” asked Frigga. “Have you recovered from the birth?”

Loki shrugged. “I’m as well as can be expected, just a bit sore and tired. My thanks to everyone for allowing me to sleep uninterrupted. That helped tremendously.”

“We enjoyed it,” Farbauti said, distracting the baby by making funny faces at him. “It’s been so long since I’ve had an infant to care for.”

Frigga nodded agreement. “Yes, for me as well. It will be difficult returning home; I’ll miss him dreadfully.” She brushed a lock of hair from Loki’s forehead. “And, you too, dear. It’s been so good to be with you again. Almost like old times.”

Loki nodded, and gave her a small smile. “I’ve missed you too, Mother. I...” He bit his lip and looked down at the floor. “I don’t suppose... Father’s said anything? About the baby, I mean.”

A sad look crossed Frigga’s face. She ruefully shook her head. “No, I’m afraid not.” In reality, Odin had angrily “forbidden” Frigga from coming to Midgard at all, a command she’d irritably shot down immediately. After that, Odin had simply chosen to ignore the whole situation, merely wishing her good travels upon her departure, and hoping she’d return as quickly as possible. At that point, Frigga hadn’t bothered to waste any more breath on trying to persuade Odin to forgive Loki; she was content that he was no longer focused on meting out further punishment. But, it broke her heart that her husband was so stubborn. 

Which Loki knew very well. She raised an eyebrow at her son. “Did you really expect him to?”

Loki sighed. “No, of course not. It’s just, I was rather hoping...”

“What?”

Loki gave her a quick, bitter glance. “I thought perhaps Odin might finally put aside his anger at me, and be willing to do something for my boy.”

“Such as?”

“A glamour spell. To give him a Midgardian appearance.”

Farbauti rolled her eyes. “And, why in the Nine would you want that?”

Loki’s bitterness now came out in his tone. “Because Midgard is my home now, our home. And, in case you haven’t noticed, the locals aren’t too accepting of people who look different from themselves. Especially those from other realms. I don’t wish that for Jacob—always being an oddity, a freak.” He stroked the baby’s downy head. “It’s not his fault his father is one.”

A sudden intake of breath came from the Jotunn queen. “How dare you!” she said harshly. “How dare you call yourself a freak! You are of my blood, little one. You come from rulers, conquerors, warriors—great men and women, challenged by direst circumstances only to triumph...” Her words trailed off as she visibly got a hold of her emotions. “You have nothing to be ashamed of, in spite of the Aesir teachings you were so unfortunately raised with. Why, I would be happy, grateful even, to bring you and Jari back to Jotunheim to take your place in the royal family! You need only say the word, and—”

Loki silenced Farbauti with a steely glare. “That... is a very kind offer. But, I’m afraid I will have to decline. We belong here, with Tony. It’s what I want. Jacob will simply have to learn to get along just as he is. I suppose it will only make him stronger.”

“Loki...” Frigga spoke gently. “Is it possible you could cast such a spell yourself?”

“No, never. Not one that would last a lifetime, or even a whole day. I haven’t that kind of power. No one has, except for the Allfather.” 

Farbauti was still wearing a snitty expression, but she brightened. “Well, silly boy, that’s what I gave you the pendant for.”

“What pendant...?” Loki asked before remembering the ice-bound present from his baby shower. “Oh... I’d forgotten all about it.” He glanced at Frigga, noting her horrified expression. “I gather you did as well?”

“Uh, yes... Farbauti, may I have a word with you?” Frigga hastily stood up and headed out into the hallway, followed by the Jotunn. When they were out of earshot, Frigga spoke in an urgent whisper. “What is the pendant? What properties does it contain?”

Farbauti shrugged slightly and raised her eyes to the ceiling thoughtfully. “It is fashioned from a bit of ore mined from the cave in which the Casket of Ancient Winters was once stored. It will provide Loki a measure of protection in battle, as well as a great deal of additional power for his _seidr.”_

“Loki doesn’t need additional power!” 

“Evidently he does,” Farbauti answered in a prickly tone. “And, he shall have it. It is little enough I can do for him, given the circumstances.”

“You will do nothing of the sort—you have no idea what could happen—”

“Oh, do you fear your precious Asgard might be in danger if Loki were to be on more equal footing with your husband?” Farbauti’s eyes snapped excitedly, and Frigga drew herself up to her full regal height.

The two rulers looked as if they were about to engage in some sort of battle right then and there, but Tony sauntered up to them and gave them a charming smile. “Ladies, is anything wrong? We could all hear you, uh, talking, back in the room, and I thought maybe there was something I could do for you?”

Both women appeared to calm down, and they both shook their heads. “No, Tony. Everything is fine,” Frigga said firmly. She looked at Farbauti and held out her hand. “We mustn’t fight. We’ve come so far in bringing peace to both our realms. Let’s not ruin it.”

Farbauti took her hand and nodded solemnly. “Of course, I completely agree. But, let us remember, we are talking about our—that is, your—son. Am I to understand that you don’t trust him?”

“No! It’s just that—”

“Whoa, whoa, what’s this about not trusting Loki?” Tony asked quickly.

“I never said I didn’t trust him,” Frigga answered, a distressed frown clouding her eyes. “I simply fear that the stability he’s found could be threatened by the power of Farbauti’s pendant. We don’t know what sort of effect it might have on him.” 

Tony frowned uncertainly. “Wait, are you talking about that necklace with the blue rock that nearly gave everyone terminal frostbite at the baby shower? It could hurt Loki?”

“No!” Farbauti interjected. “On the contrary! It will strengthen him through his _seidr,_ it will help him achieve more than he ever dreamed of on his own! Why would you deny him that?” she demanded of Frigga.

“Because,” Loki said, sauntering toward the three in the hall, “...my mother is a very wise woman. She fears that, as my magic grows, I will return to a state of power-hungry madness.” Loki draped his arm around Frigga’s shoulders and pulled her close. “And, of course, there was a time when she certainly would have been right. Perhaps she still is.” Loki smiled fondly into his mother’s eyes, and she caressed his cheek with the tips of her fingers.

“Oh, Loki. I couldn’t bear to lose you again.”

“I know.” He turned to Tony. “I couldn’t bear to lose all I’ve been fortunate enough to gain, either. I’m afraid Jacob will have to remain Jotunn in appearance. It’s possible he’s inherited the ability to shape-shift, so perhaps one day he’ll be able to change to suit himself, but I expect that will be many years from now, if at all.”

Tony blinked. “Wait, you’re saying—using the necklace—”

“Pendant.”

“Okay, pendant—you could do some hoo-doo on the kid and make him look, uh, Midgardian?”

“Possibly. Is that correct, Farbauti?”

“Yes. Of course, I still don’t agree that such a thing is necessary, but you are Jari’s father and it is your decision.”

“My decision... is to send the wretched pendant back to Jotunheim with you. I cannot take any chances with my strength of mind.” Loki sadly turned and began walking away. 

“Stop!” Tony called. “Come back here. Look at me.” Loki did as he was asked—he loved Tony’s dominant voice—and he stood before his lover and peered into Tony’s eyes.

“Yes?”

Tony put his hands on Loki’s shoulders. “Damn it, am I the only one who’s been paying attention? Look at you! Look at who you are! You’re Loki, and no one—and nothing—controls you, but you. Think about where you were before, way back when we first met—and look at you now. You’re strong. You know what you want, and you know what you have. You really think a little piece of rock is going to change that?”

Loki listened unwaveringly, and suddenly, a tear ran down his cheek. “You foolish mortal. How can you have such faith in me? How can you—”

“How can I?” Tony demanded. “How can I _not?_ I know you. I know what you did on Trondheim, and I watched you heal yourself when your guts were spilling out. A man like that doesn’t cave. You’re not going to mess up what we have—lose your son, your friends, your family. You think you’re going to fuck me over? Uh-uh. Shit, if I really thought that could ever happen, I wouldn’t have bought you that damn pizza in the first place.” Breathing hard, Tony dropped his hands and crossed his arms, never losing eye contact with Loki. 

Loki laughed a little. He closed his eyes and seemed to be working through something. Then, he opened his eyes and said, “All right. I’m willing to try. But, I want all of the Avengers—especially Banner—in the room with us. Once I’ve done the spell, I want the pendant taken away. If there’s a problem... I’ll expect you to take care of it, Mother. In whatever way necessary.”

“Loki...” Frigga gasped. “I could never hurt you!”

“That’s what Dr. Banner is for. But he’ll need to be guided by the others.”

“It won’t come to that,” Tony said quietly.

“I hope not.” Loki grinned. “Anyway, if I cause any trouble, Odin will have my head before Banner even gets to the proper shade of green. I’m not worried.”

“And, neither am I.” Tony took Loki into a great hug and kissed him tenderly. “I love you. Now, let me get everybody together, and let’s see what that dime-store jewelry can do for our boy. Sorry, Queen Farbauti, no disrespect intended.”

Farbauti waved her hand dismissively. “Of course.” She watched Tony and Loki head back to the living room and then turned to Frigga. “What is a ‘dime-store,’ do you suppose?”

“I have no idea,” Frigga said. The two women grinned and then returned to the living room as well.


	53. Chapter 53

The atmosphere in Stark Tower was a far cry from the festive mood of the previous day. The Avengers filed in, each wearing an uncertain frown; they’d each received a cryptic early morning phone call from Tony, something about Loki amping up his wizardly mojo and wanting back-up available, just in case. His voice had been a little more high-pitched than usual, and none of it made much sense, but they came anyway.

 

There were similar looks of concern from Frigga and Thor. They were occupied  watching Loki feed little Jacob, each wondering if it could really be possible for the sweetly good-natured man, smiling and holding his tiny son, to become the dark villain who’d brought about such havoc and misery to so many, not so very long ago. 

 

Such thoughts clearly didn’t trouble Farbauti. She looked on as well, alternating between enjoying the sight of her long-lost son and new grandchild with starting up a spritely conversation with Steve Rogers, who appeared more at ease with her than with anyone else.

 

Loki himself had completely reclaimed his regal bearing, holding himself in a proud and cocky manner, yet his pose was softened by the gentle way he cradled the infant and spoke softly to him, encouraging him to finish his bottle. His smile penetrated the cold mask he’d worn so often around people like Thor and Clint, reaching into his clear green eyes and making them dance. 

 

Tony was the only one appearing to be out-and-out _worried._ He trusted Loki, he really did, but there was a wealth of knowledge about Loki’s magic that Tony wasn’t up to speed on, and of course everything always seemed worse in his imagination. He was running doomsday scenarios through his mind, counting off items in his contingency plan—Hulk post-disaster containment, check; Ironman suit in readiness, check; JARVIS’ emergency mode, up and running, check—over and over again. Not that any of that was going to come up, but still. No way was he going to take a chance on another Loki-led attack on New York, or all of Midgard, or whatever the hell his beguiling lover might turn his attention to, addled by an additional boost of power. 

 

Food had appeared, enough to sate even an Asgardian’s healthy appetite, and people milled around, drinking coffee and nibbling at croissants or danishes, waiting for a word of direction from Tony. Tony and Frigga looked to Loki, who was now holding a onesie-clad Jacob over his shoulder and patting his little back. A loud “burp!” erupted from the baby, and everyone laughed, releasing some of the tension.

 

With that, Loki stood up. “All right. It’s time to get on with things.” He handed Jacob to Thor, who wrapped a baby blanket protectively around the child and beamed happily at being trusted with his charge. Loki smiled wryly at that, and then asked, “Did Tony explain why he asked you here this morning?” Loki looked around and saw some half-hearted shrugs.

 

“It was pretty early. He wasn’t very... clear,” Natasha said.

 

“What a surprise.” Loki rolled his eyes. “Well, in essence, I want to cast a spell on Jacob, which will mask his Jotunn appearance for the rest of his life. I haven’t the power to do so on my own, so I’ll be drawing energy from ore brought here from Jotunheim.” He cast a fond look at Tony. “And, our Man of Iron is worried that I will lose control and revert to the treacherous madman I was before. Which...” He surveyed the room, locking eyes with each Avenger for a moment before drawing himself up even straighter. “...is not an unfounded concern.”

 

Bruce shifted uncomfortably on the couch. “So, you think you might go bonkers on us, is that it?” 

 

A soft, “eh-eh-eh,” escaped Loki’s lips. “Something like that. I’d hope to be a trifle more elegant than that, but yes.”

 

“Loki, you’ve worked so hard.” Thor stepped forward, holding Jacob easily with one hand. With the other, he clasped Loki’s shoulder. “You’re strong. Surely you can manage this, for the good of your son?”

 

Loki nodded. “I believe I can, otherwise I wouldn’t even try. But, like Tony, I believe in being prepared for all contingencies.” He grinned a little. “That’s where you and I differ, isn’t it, brother?”

 

Thor smiled back. “I’ve learned much from you, believe it or not. I hope I am the better for it.”

 

A somber look came over Loki. He nodded again and then took a deep breath. “Let’s get this over with.”

 

“Come on, Avengers. We’re doing this down in the lab.” Tony gave Frigga and Farbauti a nod of acknowledgement. “I guess you two should come too, right?”

 

“Of course,” Frigga agreed. The grandmothers stood and followed the troupe to elevator. They all crowded in, Thor maintaining possession of his little nephew, and when the doors opened again, Tony led them into his beloved lab.

 

******

 

Everyone chose a place to sit or lean around the periphery of the big room. Tony gathered chairs and made a spot for him, Loki, and Thor to sit in a circle. When everyone was situated, he went to stand by the old wall safe where the pendant was  stored. “So, who wants to do the unveiling?” he asked.

 

“Let me,” Farbauti answered. She strode over and when Tony swung open the safe’s door, she reached in and brought out the hide-wrapped object. She untied the sinew strips that bound it, and dangled the pendant from one finger. The cold blue stone in its center lit up the dim corner where they stood. Farbauti smiled. 

 

“Ah, see? It’s so beautiful, is it not? Loki, here is your gift.” She went to Loki and knelt beside him, lifting his hand and pressing the pendant into his palm. “Use it well, my son.” The name came easily to her now, and Loki acknowledged it with a slight nod. 

 

“Thank you.” He gripped the pendant, its blue glow shimmering between his fingers. He closed his eyes and the room fell silent as everyone watched in varying stages of anxiousness as Loki’s placid expression deepened into a furrow of concentration, and then into something like pain. His breaths came faster and the light in his closed hand seemed to shoot out around his fingers and soak into the veins of his skin. He gasped, threw his head back and clutched the pendant to his chest with both hands. 

 

A great cacophony of sights and sounds assaulted his mind, unseen hands dragging him downward into a cold, stony abyss. They let him go, he began to fall, and he saw...

 

_Captain America, a broken, bloody mess—_

_Natasha Romanova, strung up by the neck like a doll._

_The Hulk, gutted, rotting, laid out for the buzzards and coyotes._

_Hawkeye, beaten stupid, awaiting a death blow, begging for it..._

 

_And then... A triumphant return to Jotunheim as Loki, the Jotunn King, proudly wearing his true flesh, ruling as he was meant to—Farbauti at his right hand, his brothers by birth on his left... Marching into Asgard, to conquer the land of Odin, returning with the Allfather’s head on a spike at last..._

 

Damn it. 

 

_NO._  

 

Please, no. Somewhere from deep within his soul came questions— _Where was Tony? Jacob? Frigga?_ They were in none of those visions. Loki, in his mind’s eye, forced himself to freeze mid-fall. The hands grabbed at him again, but he struggled free, and then he was ascending, up, up, until he was on his feet, firm on solid ground.

 

“By the Norns...” he hissed, opening his eyes. He sat panting, staring at the floor for a long moment. “The power of this thing...” A slow, wicked grin tugged at his lips. “What I could have done with this.” He laughed darkly and threw a glance toward Steve, Clint and Natasha. “I’d have had you all on your knees before me, you know. Ah, it would have been grand.”

 

All three flinched and went into full alert mode. Bruce came forward, crossing his arms over his chest, taking up a flank position.

 

Tony saw, and quickly reached out and put a strong hand on the nape of Loki’s neck, kneading the sinewy muscles under taut skin. “Babe?” he said into Loki’s ear. “How about we focus on, uh, making the Jakester a little less blue, okay? Want to?”

 

Loki took a deep breath, shuddering at Tony’s touch as he filled his lungs with cleansing air. “Yes. Yes, Tony, I do.” He turned his gaze to Tony, giving him a reassuring look. “It’s all right, I’m fine. I’m in control. I was just... daydreaming.” He held out his hand and opened his fist, revealing the glowing stone. He stood up and walked around the room, letting everyone look at it and feel its presence. “To be sure, this holds a powerful energy within it,” he announced. “But without my _seidr_ , it’s just a rock.” He returned to his seat and faced Thor. “Look at me, Thor. I _am_ in control, am I not?”

 

The two brothers sat staring at each other. Thor searched Loki’s eyes for hints of evil or lies or cruelty, but he saw only clear reason. He gave a tentative smile, and then reached out and cupped Loki’s face in his big hand. He held it there for a long moment, and kept Loki’s unwavering gaze. At last, he dropped his hand and said, “Yes. I believe you are.”

 

Loki smiled back. “And, I will never again bring harm to those I love. I swear it.” 

 

“All right. Are you ready to cast the spell then, brother?” 

 

Loki nodded. He took Jacob and cradled him in one arm. The infant was asleep, but he made a sweet cooing noise as he snuggled into his father’s grip. Loki held the pendant tightly with his other hand and began making gestures in patterns over Jacob, starting at his head and moving slowly down his small body. He murmured strange words under his breath and then handed the pendant back to Farbauti and placed his empty hand on Jacob’s chest. 

 

Everyone gathered close and watched in amazement as Jacob’s sky-blue flesh began to fade into a soft creamy pinkish color. The light tribal markings disappeared, and after a few moments, Jacob had the appearance of any typical mortal baby one might encounter in the realm of Midgard. Loki gently tickled the little one under his chin, and Jacob briefly opened his eyes—revealing strikingly beautiful, but happily unremarkable, dark blue orbs.

 

“It is done,” Loki said with a tired sigh. He looked first at Thor, and then at Tony before anxiously examining Jacob’s new features. “Is he all right?” 

 

Both men smiled and Tony moved in for a hug. “He’s gorgeous,” Tony said.

 

“My beautiful nephew.” Thor pressed a kiss onto Jacob’s forehead.

 

“A bit boring, but he’s still lovely,” Farbauti said with a sniff. “However, I hope one day he will choose to wear his true countenance.”

 

“He might,” Loki said generously. “It will be up to him. And, Tony and I will explain it all to him as soon as he is old enough to comprehend.” He gave Tony a rueful grin; he could already imagine the awkward conversation to come. But, that was part of being a parent, he supposed. 

 

Tony turned to Farbauti, “Hey, let’s put away the necklace now, okay? Don’t want to push it.” 

 

Farbauti shrugged. “It belongs to Loki. What would _you_ like to do with it, son?”

 

Loki waved dismissively. “Lock it up. That will keep it safe from foolish mortals. If I ever have need of it, a mere lock won’t keep it from me. But, I hope that day will never come.”

 

It was a grim thought, and everyone fell silent as they mulled it over. Then, Jacob opened his blue eyes and began fussing, and Loki chuckled. “Oh, dear, the little one’s ceased being the center of attention for a moment, we can’t have that. I think it’s time for a bath, don’t you, Papa? Would you please do the honors?”

 

“Yeah, glad to.” Tony took Jacob and headed to the elevator. “There’s still plenty of food and coffee, if anyone wants more breakfast. I need to go have a nice quiet nervous breakdown myself, so if you could all see yourselves out, that’d be great. Thanks.” He stepped into the elevator car and closed the door, leaving the group to start chatting and laughing in relief. Thor and Loki stood up and went to wait in the anteroom for the car to come back down, while the others continued to mill around in the lab itself. 

 

“I’m proud of you, brother.” Thor slipped an arm around Loki’s shoulders and squeezed tightly. Loki groaned in mock disgust.

 

“Well, I live for that, you know,” he said sardonically, but he leaned into the embrace just a little bit. It was because he was exhausted, he told himself. A perfectly plausible explanation, nothing to do with appreciating his oaf of a brother’s good will.

 

In truth, he _was_ exhausted. He’d held his _seidr_ at bay for so long, he felt wrung out by his efforts, and he longed for a comfy chair to collapse into. But, it was a good kind of exhaustion, and knowing that he’d lived up to Tony’s—and, yes, Thor’s—faith in him wasn’t a bad feeling, either. Once he got some food and coffee into himself, he thought he might begin to feel quite a bit more chipper indeed. He began herding everyone into the elevator as soon as it came back down—he didn’t want to hang out in Tony’s inhospitable and funky-smelling workshop anymore. 

 

Aaand, there was another reason he was in a hurry to get back upstairs. He might not be evil, but he was still the god of mischief, and he’d been unable to resist playing a tiny little prank on Tony. 

 

He wanted to be on hand to enjoy the fireworks when his mortal discovered what it was.

 


	54. Settling In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter, although I do want to do an epilogue at some point. Thanks to all who have read, commented, and given kudos! I loved every bit of it.

When the elevator reached the Stark living quarters, everyone filed out and returned to the breakfast spread for more food and drink. People were now in a cheerful mood, happy that the tension hanging in the air from before was totally gone. Voices rose in conversation and laughter. 

Loki poured himself a cup of coffee, keeping an ear cocked toward the master bedroom where Tony had taken Jacob. He could hear his mate whistling, and he didn’t have to see to know what Tony was doing—taking a few precious moments of calm for himself, nuzzling his child, maybe standing in front of the bathroom mirror admiring how he managed to look pretty damn dashing, even with an infant in his arms. 

Then came the sound of a faucet giving a noisy creak as water began to flow and warm up. Now, Tony would be placing Jacob on the changing table in the bedroom to get him ready for his bath. Loki stepped a little closer to the door leading to the hallway and, yes, he could hear Tony tunelessly singing one of his beloved Sabbath songs—”...I’m goin’ off the rails on a crazy traaaain...”—and Loki briefly wondered if that had anything to do with him, when Tony’s happy daddy-singing voice took a decidedly upward screech and a horrified _“LOKI!”_ cut through the placid murmurs of chatting in the living room. 

“Loki! Goddamn it, what the hell—” Tony zipped out of the bedroom with the baby clutched against his chest. He stopped in his tracks at the sight of Loki, and stood breathing heavily, reminding Loki of a cartoon bull. Everyone had gathered around the trickster god, open-mouthed and wide-eyed, gawping at the sight of the tiny naked infant sporting a pair of wetly glistening gossamer wings that gently, slowly, flit up and down as if in time with a heartbeat.

A little gasp came from each of the women, and then the group fell silent. 

“Oh, dear. How ever could that have happened?” Loki asked, a thoughtful frown etched on his face.

Tony now had a murderous air about him. Thor cast a deeply concerned glance at his brother. “Loki,” he intoned gravely. “I’m sure this is no fault of yours, exactly, but it’s a disaster all the same. Can you fix it?”

“Yeah, Loki, _fix_ it,” Tony snarled.

“Hmm, well... I don’t know that I want to.” Loki strolled up to his little son and examined the shimmery appendages that seemed to unfold and get larger by the minute. “Don’t you think he’ll like them?” he asked Tony with wide, innocent eyes. “They appear quite sturdy. I’m sure they could hold him aloft. I recall wishing I could fly when I was a boy, and—”

“LOKI.” Tony sounded a little wild by now, and everyone started speaking at once, offering encouragement, threats, or advice to the amused sorcerer. Only Frigga seemed as unconcerned as Loki. 

“Loki, my dear, you’re being very cruel,” she said, squeezing his arm affectionately. “Stop torturing your partner.”

“But, Mother—can’t I have any fun?” Loki asked, pouting. “It’s just a joke.”

“A JOKE?” Tony almost screamed. “Turning our kid into Peter Pan is a _JOKE?”_

“It’s just an illusion, love.” With a much grander flourish than Frigga thought absolutely necessary, Loki waved a hand and the wings disappeared. 

Jacob gave a contented gurgle.

Tony looked down at his son and hastily ran his free hand over the perfect little shoulder blades. Seeing and feeling nothing that wasn’t supposed to be there, he leveled a relieved, if baleful, gaze at his lover. “Okay, Maestro, it’s time we set some boundaries. I don’t care what you do to me—you can give me purple hair, or boobs, or turn me into a newt or whatever—but from now on, Jacob is off limits. Understand?”

The whole group was studiously watching Loki, Thor with an anxious set to his jaw—he knew his little brother very well, and knew that telling him NOT to do something was tantamount to paving a rose-strewn path for him—and now that the dark-haired god again had full control of his seidr, Thor was trying to envision what the Avengers would do if Tony was suddenly turned into a tiny metal-suited amphibian—but Loki just shook his head ruefully. 

“Oh, Tony. Of course. That must have been a terrible shock for you, I forget that your fragile human psyche can be so easily shaken. Forgive me?” He hopefully held out his arms, and everyone turned to Tony, waiting to see what he’d do. He stood pat for a moment. Then, he rolled his eyes, shrugged, and went to accept Loki’s embrace. 

“Why do your apologies always manage to make me sound like a pathetic four-year-old? But anyway—yeah, okay. Just remember, Jake’s a baby, not a new pet for you to dress up in Halloween costumes and shit.”

“I know, I know. It won’t happen again, I promise.” Loki gathered his little family in close and held them tightly, eyes closed, breathing in the scent of his mate and child. Then a wily little smile crept across his face. “But, now that you mention it, you’d look amazing with purple hair. And, an ample bosom would—”

“NO!” Tony shouted, pulling away. “Back off, Criss Angel—I was exaggerating for effect, not making a request!”

“Oh! Well, as you wish. Although, later, when we’re alone, we could—”

“I said no!”

Loki gave an exasperated scowl. “Ugh, you’re such a tease. All right, fine, I’m sure we can think of something equally as interesting to liven up things in the bedroom. But for now, I’d like to enjoy our guests, and weren’t you going to give the baby a bath? Really, Tony, you have such a limited attention span, how do you ever get anything done?”

Tony hadn’t quite recovered from the prank, and he was beginning to feel the must-murder-Loki vibe come over him again, but he took a deep breath and focused on cuddling Jacob. “O...kay. I think I’ll do that.” He turned to address his guests. “Listen, guys, eat up, hang loose—and I’ll see you in a few.” 

Everyone settled down again, and Farbauti came and put an arm around Loki’s shoulders, chuckling. “You really do have a bit of the devil in you, don’t you, my boy? That was quite good.”

“One of his less devious tricks,” Thor said, before downing a a large glass of orange juice.

“It would have been quite delightful were it not for poor Tony being taken to the verge of self-combustion,” Frigga sighed. “But, fortunately, you seem to have mollified him somewhat.” 

“Yes, you really must give me some advice on how to court a mortal,” Farbauti said quietly.

“I beg your pardon?” Loki said, brows raised. With everything going on, he hadn’t taken note of Farbauti being interested in any of the locals. Now, he did a quick sweep around the room, hoping to spot Farbauti’s intended. Barton? Possible, but not likely. Banner? Loki couldn’t imagine his lusty birth mother settling for the shy scientist, but then, maybe she’d heard about his green alter-ego and was intrigued by the challenge. Still, Bruce had eyes only for Pepper. Oo, what about Pepper, or one of the other ladies? Could be, but—oh, wait. Never mind.

The Captain. 

Steve Rogers was standing by himself, nibbling a cinnamon roll, trying not to be seen taking surreptitious glances at Farbauti. Loki grinned and turned back to face her.

“I take it you’ve set your sights on Rogers?”

Farbauti gave a little giggle. “Yes, how did you know?”

“Oh, look at him over there, mooning after you. It’s obvious. And, I don’t think you need any advice from me, you clearly have him right where you want him.”

“Well, yes, he does seem to be fond of me. He’s even offered to take me to some place called ‘Coney Island,’ which he says is an amusement park, whatever that is. But there’s a problem—I don’t wish to call undue attention to myself here in this strange realm. I would like to, you know, ‘blend in.’ So... Do you think you could help me cast a spell, like you did for Jary? It needn’t be so powerful, I would only want it to last a day.”

Loki cocked his head at the exotic Frost Giant queen. He could sense the seidr she possessed. “Yes, I think so. In fact, I’d wager I could teach you to do it yourself, any time you wish, in case this becomes more than a one-time thing.”

Farbauti flashed a startlingly radiant smile. “That would be perfect! Come, let’s find a bit of privacy.” She made a point of catching Steve’s eye, and his face lit up at the sight of her. He raised a hand in greeting and Farbauti waved coquettishly as she sailed out of the room behind Loki.

******

Three days later, it was time for the visitors from other realms to leave, and none of them were happy. Thor had spent the better part of two blissful days with Jane, and was now filled with visions of what it would be like to have a baby of his own with her. And, it was bad enough to have to return to Asgard without her, but knowing he’d be apart from his precious little nephew made his heart ache in a very new way.

Frigga was in tears as she cradled Jacob in her arms for the last time for who knew how long. “He’ll be in school by the time I get to see him again!” she said with a break in her voice.

“Now, now, my dear,” Alfarin said comfortingly. “He may not age like human children—why, he might not even start walking for another two score years or more!”

Tony’s eyes widened and he clutched Loki’s arm. “‘Two score’—that’s what, like forty years or something? Is he saying our kid could be in diapers for _forty years?”_

“Shush, dear, don’t be ridiculous. He’s half human, I’m sure we’re only looking at twenty or so.” Loki absently patted Tony’s arm before going to hug his mother.

Farbauti was stoic even though her heart sank at the very thought of having to leave. She remained a picture of royal dignity, apart from a gigantic pink stuffed monkey she clutched in one arm. Steve had won it for her on their date to Coney Island, a perfect day neither of them would ever forget. Farbauti had taken on her brand-new human form, with tawny skin, huge brown eyes and silky black hair, and a stature that was on the tall side for a mortal woman, but not particularly unusual. She’d worn a yellow sundress and white sandals, and while Steve’s breath was stolen by her beauty, he realized he was taken with the woman herself, not her appearance. He himself held his jaw tightly to keep from showing emotion.

It was with vast reluctance that Thor eventually announced that they must go; and, at that, thinly held-back sorrow was released, and everyone began hugging everyone. A tear ran down Loki’s cheek as he said his goodbyes. He’d just begun to relax and enjoy having his extended family around him, and now he wouldn’t see them again for a very long time. Or maybe never, everyone but Thor anyway, who was the only one free to come and go as he pleased. 

Frigga placed Jacob back in Loki’s arms and kissed her son’s wet cheek. “It’s all right, my love. We’ll be together again before you know it, don’t worry.”

“That’s very nice to say, but you know you won’t be able to persuade Odin to let you go again for a very long time. And, of course, it’s not as if I can just zip off to Asgard any time I like.” He swiped away a tear with the back of his hand and didn’t bother to hide the bitterness in his voice.

Frigga tried to think of something comforting to say, but could think of nothing that wouldn’t sound like ridiculous fluff. So she just pursed her lips and pushed a stray strand of hair from Loki’s brow. She hugged him tightly and said, “I love you, son.”

“I love you, too,” Loki murmured into her ear. He managed a small smile as he pulled away and picked up Jacob’s little arm to wave goodbye to his grandmother.

Tony accompanied the group up to the roof, but Loki stayed back to rock Jacob to sleep. There was nothing he could do to change things, so he decided he might as well take a nap, too, and let his restless mind be at peace for a bit.

*****

Weeks passed. Tony and Loki settled into something of a routine, or as much as they could with one of them running a multi-billion dollar corporation as well as being an Avenger. Tony had understandably neglected both responsibilities for quite a while, and was now finding ways to tend to them while still being thoroughly immersed in his family. He’d had a pretty terrible example in his own father, and he was determined not to make the mistakes he’d made. No, Tony would be there, with Loki and Jacob, first. The rest would be dealt with as he could, but not at their expense. Assuming Manhattan, or the world, wasn’t at risk or anything, of course.

Loki was one hundred per cent focused on loving Jacob. It was strange for him at first, having all these feelings for a helpless, demanding little creature. Loki had never been around children all that much, certainly not babies. Aesir men, including fathers, were kind and affectionate toward little ones, but they weren’t expected to waste their time on something that could neither work nor fight; Loki himself had only sporadic memories of Odin before he was old enough to run around the palace on his own. So, knowing how to care for a baby, beyond feeding, bathing and changing him, was quite bewildering.

And, there were no real examples of parenting in his day to day life. No one they knew had children. When Loki loaded Jacob into a stroller and walked to the park for an airing, he closely observed the other parents and noticed they were almost exclusively women. They noticed him, too, and he often found himself in the middle of a group of ladies, each exclaiming over Jacob’s incredible cuteness before flirting and making numerous side-eye glances at Loki’s handsome face. 

There was a time he’d have had a field day with that, seducing bored trophy wives for an afternoon’s entertainment—it occurred to him that Midgardian men were quite stupid not to take advantage of such opportunities—but he genuinely had no romantic interest in anyone but Tony these days. And, efforts to ask advice or to glean parenting tips were quickly taken as encouragement for more flirting, and he often had to shake the women off like a dog climbing out of a bathtub before he could go home.

So, that was no help. Instead, he learned to listen to his heart and use instinct and common sense to take care of his son, mysterious though his behavior often was. And, he really had no expectations of the child. He assumed that someday, in good time, he’d become more advanced, learn to walk and talk and feed himself, and Loki rather suspected that the older he got, the less Jacob would need—or want—him around. 

But, one day, Loki walked into the nursery and at the sight of him, Jacob’s toothless little face lit up in a smile, a real smile, (making him look even more like Tony than usual) and Loki’s heart nearly burst. He’d scooped up his wriggly bundle and cuddled him, crooning to him in a goofy way that had Tony laughing uproariously, but Loki didn’t care. It was the first time he’d felt the pure love of a child, and he was hooked. He knew then and there that he would spend the rest of his life trying to be worthy of the love held in that sunny smile.


End file.
